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ZoeticLark Archive

View 0 posts and 135 comments by ZoeticLark on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
-1

Im not actually taking it personally, thats your projection. You just didnt pick up on the tongue in cheek sarcasm. His generalization doesnt stand up to reality, so its not very general is it? Dont chastise me because he cant articulate or make a good point. Or are you going to come to his rescue, white knight him, rather than see my point?
/r/seduction29/10/22 06:51 PM
1

Was that women being pursued for so long then dumped after sex or did the guy do it because he actually wanted a relationship with her? Did the woman misread the long pursuit as actual interest thereby causing her to do something she was otherwise resistant to or fully agaisnt? Was it a zero sum game or did they both win in the end? Being "smart about it" sounds like maybe act of deception, if it was just to tag her. Stealth and trickery is one thing, maybe that guy felt proud of his accomplishe…
/r/seduction29/10/22 05:20 PM
1

Who cares, she said no. The problem here is you arent able to accept it at face value.
/r/seduction29/10/22 05:17 PM
1

Wow, this is terrible i didnt know this is what i look like to men. No wonder they cant talk to me. It must be humiliating to even look at my gender anymore. So sorry, damn. So if im not pursued by men day and night does that mean i lack quality? Being honest, emotionally stable, hardworking, etc means nothing, if i am not being pursued? i thought men werent pursuing bc of narratives like this, but its actually me thats low quality and undeserving, hmm interesting take away. I have met strangers…
/r/seduction29/10/22 05:07 PM
2

This analogy is astounding, haha! I wonder where you get your data?
/r/seduction21/10/22 04:37 PM
7

Id be more inclined to imagine it the other way around... she liked the rush and excitement, to let loose for a night, and she can, when the moment arises, because she is a grown woman. But- her routine is that she is (presumably) single and probably has a life full of engagements and obligations and a short notice date during the week can be hard to say yes to, even if a part of her really wants to, thereby making it difficult to just say no thanks. Hence, no response. (That's just one possibil…
/r/seduction21/10/22 04:36 PM
1

The timeline and boundaries and practice is different for everyone, thats why communicating directly about these things with each idividual is important... If it were me, Id text the person back and say something like, "Everyone has different approaches, for me i think of the first date as an introduction/meet up, and if there is a 2nd date, dive deeper." Or something that communciates your preferred timeline/boundary with some level of benevolence/innocence. If you want another date, maybe you …
/r/seduction19/10/22 05:51 PM
1

No hard, fast rules for anything. No sense in hiding away till some day down the road. Ill admit, i think dating apps are whack these days. But, i definitely dont think anyone should swear off of socializing or having multi gender friends, along the way. Thats how we learn more about ourselves, develop our social skills, by making mustakes and getting things right with others... how we practice, get more confortable being pur better selves, through direct interactions with people and working on …
/r/seduction13/10/22 11:53 PM
1

Looks have limits, (drag queens own the right to be masters of the craft), but lies, limitless. Joking aside, we all have masculine and feminine aspects, so what ever you asign to the other, you also asign to yourself in some twisted quantum mirror veil of illusion we have yet to fully grasp as a species. All things go both ways, to a degree. Yes, i think there are generalizations that can be made, but that doesnt make them absolutes. There are always exceptions and gray area. Dont rely too much…
/r/seduction11/10/22 03:00 PM
2

Yeah.. was gonna say, i often swipe left when their dog is front and center on a dating profile... like you said, i see they are hitting their algorithmic points. It comes off as boring to me.
/r/seduction28/09/22 02:57 PM
1

Yes, both.
/r/seduction27/09/22 03:45 PM
2

Oh yeah, dont misunderstand, im all for a bit of fun, haha
/r/seduction27/09/22 03:38 PM
2

I know alot of people get down on being friends with women, but i dont think theres anything wrong with it and in fact it would just give you exposure to how women think and what they want. Like even observing who she is into, if you can detach from outcomes enough, i feel one could learn alot... Anyway, back in the day, women had handkerchiefs and so they were able to give a gentleman a cue that they were open to talking. These days, well etiquette is all but out the window, i think you could g…
/r/seduction27/09/22 03:17 PM
2

Most of the people i dated long term, werent found on dating sites. The dating sites just give me an opportunity to practice my social skills in between relationships, up until the point i actually meet someone i really like. Thats how i try to see o.l.d. as social practice and to witness what i dont want, in person. Helps me calibrate so im not totally rusty when i meet someone really cool.
/r/seduction27/09/22 03:06 PM
3

Its because most of them are young here and think life is a black and white binary. It isnt. Life is full of nuance and exceptions to the rules. The older you get, the more you realize that. Just remember the audience participation here is majority in the early 20s range. Reactionary, convinced they know better than anyone who dares question things like "going numb" being a good thing. Besides that could mean different things to different people based on their life experiences... though i dont r…
/r/seduction27/09/22 03:01 PM
2

It will hurt, thats part of being human... but the hope may he that it would hurt less when you are also investing in finding yourself. Love is really hard these days. It has changed and people are so judgemental and give up easily... i dont know what to do, but be good to yourself.
/r/seduction27/09/22 01:06 PM
2

Thanks! Yeah sometimes its more about unlearning and evicting bad narratives, just to make room to breath.
/r/seduction25/09/22 12:03 AM
2

"She can give you the silent treatment? Hey more peaceful afternoon for me." This reminds me of the idea that narcisism and codependence are a spectrum that touches us all, no one is immune, and in fact, we all need a little of both. Main stream talk about narcisism and codependence will have us believe its an either/or situation, but it isnt. We all need a little healthy codependence to build bonds and a little healthy narcisism to go out there and believe in ourselves to do what we came here t…
/r/seduction23/09/22 09:22 PM
2

Oof harsh responses. I was just looking at Human Design stuff. Its a way of describing energetics and how we interact with the world. But too esoteric for most people. You sound fine. The guy with a gf, probably just knows the cues that engage women, most likely. Maybe a look at some Matthew Hussey videos would give you insight into what women want and get engaged by. Its not esoteric and may offer more thoughtful, and aritculate, (non blaming/shaming) insight into attraction and how to build it…
/r/seduction22/09/22 02:17 PM
2

Understanding pacing would help. We cant just drop everything just bc they show interest. Some of us are actually busy and require time to make room for someone new, and build a new foundation of trust but with the illusion of infinite "options" there is little to no time allowed for things to grow and develop naturally these days. Friendship is frowned upon even though that is the best way to build trust. Courtship/pacing seems like a dead concept. Of course you still have to read the situation…
/r/seduction15/09/22 09:53 PM
1

Im just going to leave this here and see what happens. 👀 (containment in relationships) https://youtu.be/MJxbiHBpSc4
/r/seduction04/09/22 10:26 PM
0

You have a whole narrative that isnt what im about so we wouldnt need the 5 minutes you alot to getting to know someone! It sounds like a numbers game. I get that, to each his or her own. I'm of the mindset that if you are sociable and do social things and have female friends, the kind of woman who looks for men who are able to communicate with women outside of romance, is the kind of woman that guy will attract. But thats different time frame than what you are talking about, i think. There are …
/r/seduction30/08/22 05:32 PM
1

Wisdom>Knowledge>Facts>Data. That is the order of awareness. Dont rely too heavily on data as it is often far removed from the wisdom of the body. You may find some truth there, but data alone is not enough to show you have substance and are the person she might really want to date. Keep the data in mind, but work on yourself and be the kind of person you would want to date. We are all humam at the end of the day!
/r/seduction30/08/22 02:24 PM
4

Can't or won't? Have you done any research aside from reddit, about how to have charisma and how to interact with people? Have you taken any classes or developed your social skills? We arent born with any of these skills and social media is agood way to kill socual skills these days.. Some of us dont have the privilege of being raised in a healthy family dynamic so we have to learn it all from the beginning (as well as unlearn a few things). Thats up to each of us to be responsible for, as adult…
/r/seduction30/08/22 01:16 PM
0

If a man cant be my friend, there's no way id be intimate with him.
/r/seduction30/08/22 01:12 PM
9

We all have a unique signature to how we flirt. It can take time to discover where our confidence and interests are, but it's worth the journey!
/r/seduction30/08/22 03:43 AM
2

Attention, at the very very least- she might just be thirsty.. or.... it's a trap.
/r/seduction25/08/22 07:24 PM
10

Have some things you are into, some solo, some in group setting. The solo stuff is for you to be with yourself, doing something productive that you can be proud of. The group stuff is to practice your social skills. BOTH give you something to talk about and relate to others with. Group activity could be a sport, game night, dance, martial art, or yoga classes. Something with other people in the room, preferably where you have to be face to face, but you decide what level of interaction you are c…
/r/seduction25/08/22 12:50 AM
3

Yeah... it only sounds random to young girls who haven't heard it. Even so, I'd entertain it just for the effort it takes to step outside one's comfort zone. But... even if you have my attention, it doesnt mean flags arent going up. Its such a freakish chemistry experiment when you break it down, haha. Full of yeses and nos... which final answer will win? All depends on how well the seeker chose, whether the alignment of intent is there, at the end of the day. Guys with those openers will get gi…
/r/seduction24/08/22 11:41 PM
1

Take time for you and to be with your friends. Away from the projection mill. Clear your head, do something you enjoy whether being in nature or some sport or a favorite activity. Break the spell (how ever long you need for that) and come back to it later with a clear palette.
/r/seduction16/08/22 08:00 AM
2

Yeah, it took me a long while and many many breaks (really limited engagement) with datings apps. Only there long enough to message a few people, get a few first dates, most of which we never talk again, usually about 3 weeks, then done with it. Take a break, reconnect with me, then try again when im feeling i have the humor for it. After several years of mostly off but sometimes on the sites, i now am fairly detached from the outcome, until i have reason to be more invested. I had to change my …
/r/seduction16/08/22 02:22 AM
1

Depends on what you want. You have to make a choice here.
/r/seduction09/08/22 03:46 PM
3

Yeah i wish more men understood pacing and would have a little more imagination/ empathy.
/r/seduction05/08/22 12:34 PM
2

I said you're taking it personally because you did call me an idiot and that's a personal attack on my character rather than trying to understand what I'm saying. That is what it is, but yeah denialism again. You didn't take it personal but you have to make personal commentary about my intelligence. sure. if you say so. What I'm trying to convey is how the wording comes off. It's like if you call me an idiot gives me the impression that you're actually upset and you want to make me feel bad, for…
/r/seduction23/07/22 04:27 PM
1

I know a few friends who became life partners. Not sure where you got that info. We're human. It's kind of hard to say that there's something that doesn't work for everyone. There are exceptions to every rule.
/r/seduction23/07/22 04:10 PM
-2

Uh huh. Well If you weren't busy taking my opinion personally you would read those lines as the impressions that a statement such as "isolate one of them" conveys. To a woman.
/r/seduction23/07/22 04:08 PM
8

I mean basically the big fumble is that he doesn't realize that women can see the patterns and put the pieces together to get a gut feeling about his intentions. They don't necessarily have to have everything spelled out for them. I know for some of you this is really hard to understand. Women, especially adult women, can read your actions and assess your character based on your choice of words and actions. What you do say and do, as much as what you dont. But even if they sense it, they may not…
/r/seduction23/07/22 04:05 PM
8

I didnt say he was creepy. Lots of people do things that arent right but have no ill "intent". Or just arent aware of how it may come off or affect others. I dont know anything about the guy, but his choice of words shows a certain perspective that tells me if i saw the "isolate from friends" vibes oozing out between his words, id be isolating him the fuck away from my tribe.
/r/seduction23/07/22 04:02 PM
5

I tend to write-off people who spend too much time on social media. You are going to find that the world will be split into 2 camps maybe 3. One group will not bother with social media (most high earning people dont bother with it) another will use it sparingly and almost have a seperate personality so no personal tirades go out there, purely professional facade, and another camp will be so invested in social media as the next wave of human evolution and the world of work that it will change the…
/r/seduction23/07/22 03:55 PM
24

Well but in all fairness his word of choice was, isolate. Why is that a sticking point? Because if you care about someone's well being and rapport you won't be separating them from the people that are part of their tribe, they care about their best interest. If you want to build rapport you gain the respect of the group and she'll be falling. He didnt say, i wish id talked more to jenny. He said "isolate one of them" Denialism doesnt change the fact that this guy is looking for a human tissue, a…
/r/seduction23/07/22 03:47 PM
79

You said, "i should have isolated one of them" Isolated anyone of them, does it matter which one? Isolated, as in seperate from their group by coersive efforts? Isolated as in a weak animal from the pack? Is that really your bar? Oh and, do you actually think that not a single one of them saw "isolate and fuck" oozing out of your eyeballs and every word you uttered??? Lol. And thats why none of them stayed.
/r/seduction23/07/22 03:23 PM
2

The saddest part of all that is alot of men think we cant see the difference. The older we get the more its clear as day. It makes my skin crawl feeling like im on a chopping block about to get hacked. I might humor him temporarily so i can observe and be reminded of how gamers do; at this stage tho, i see it coming at me a mile away like a sick sort of entertainment. You nailed it tho. Be natural, know yourself, your likes/ dislikes and you will be inherently interesting enough where you dont n…
/r/seduction23/07/22 02:17 PM
1

Yes and narcissism comes in many forms, often its a subconscious pattern and people who gaslight dont even realize they are doing it. Choosing to try to see that for what it is, hear the feedback or not, is another story.
/r/seduction23/07/22 10:39 AM
3

I was just marveling about how women talking about substance here and a lot less about body type... like seriously its just not as important when we care way more about a baseline of being safe and treated like intelligent human beings and its a struggle to ensure that at times.
/r/seduction23/07/22 10:34 AM
1

Women live in a twilight zone of a systematic denial of their intelligence and the best film example ive seen recently is called Hysteria. I highly recommend it considering the funny fact that for some period of time there was a doctor that was wacking women off And it was considered a legitimate treatment for "hysteria" because they actually believed that women can't sense pleasure. Its a convenient lie to tell if you want to do displeasurabke things to another human. Men of that era didn't rea…
/r/seduction23/07/22 10:13 AM
1

I need conversational breaks, moments of silence and for gods sake dont give me your life story on the first date, or ask me about mine. A first date where they ask you a bunch of personal stuff and then never ask you out again is not a good look or feeling, whatever the reasons for not going on a second date, it seems like really rude set up either way Prior to a recent date he mentioned his ex, and that he is "totally over that" which indicated to me that he isnt over it at all. Indeed he dove…
/r/seduction23/07/22 09:50 AM
2

Gen Xer here. These stories are common for my generation. Maybe still are, but definitely gen X story. Reading about relationships and insecurity and all that stuff over the years, talking to others about my and their experiences... all helped growig up, now i keep the habit and listen to you tube in my quest to know more and do it differently, better next time.... thats all its about. I still reflect on things, what works what doesn't, discovering what kind of partner i can be along the way.
/r/seduction23/07/22 03:32 AM
1

Aw, poor you!
/r/seduction22/07/22 07:44 PM
7

So true- confident guys do get the cake, so rare tho.
/r/seduction22/07/22 05:52 PM
0

Wow that is quite the narrative. Im just a woman, but overly "attractive" men who sleep around are not that attractive to me- slimy vibes, ew. I would never ever assume a ONS might lead to a rletionship. ONS = hard no on door opening is my base assumption and probably most women at this stage. Your "data" sounds pretty stale.
/r/seduction22/07/22 05:51 PM
1

Change your mind about what things mean: Meditate/ walk/get outside for fresh air and sun. Interact with more people to get practice socializing. Look up the words and ideas you are contemplating and contemplate them some more. Think about what you do that conveys and reflects one idea or another. Know yourself - how you think and really feel, and all will be well.
/r/seduction14/07/22 01:05 PM
3

Men can be exhausting to, But if you learn to read people then you can figure out before you get involved whether they are going to be an energy drain or not.
/r/seduction14/07/22 12:12 PM
2

Facts
/r/seduction14/07/22 12:10 PM
5

Girls are interested in interesting guys. Be curious, discover new likes and dislikes that you have (in real life) and then you will be more relatable to others, if you have interests other than the gym.
/r/seduction13/07/22 02:02 PM
1

Yes, of they take the time to learn ways to connect as listed here- it can be eaaier with some ideas that make sense help shyness be overcome..
/r/seduction10/07/22 02:47 AM
8

Men who can hold a natural conversation and those who are aware and take care of their surroundings get high marks in my book.
/r/seduction09/07/22 10:50 PM
6

It means that rather than bypassing conversation and connection in pursuit of just sex, try building a longer term connection by being present in other peoples lives through group activity/ seeing then regualrly/having mutliple conversations over time... let people know who you are and reflect on how people see you and educate yourself along the way about yourself and others. Btw, you find all kinds of types of people in every walk of life. Dont let sterotypes and mental constructs about "types"…
/r/seduction08/07/22 02:31 PM
2

Yeah, i definitely believe boundaries need to be tested to be learned and at least some experimentation is important to avoid stasis! Keep things interesting by stepping out of comfort zone now and then, but always know retreating is an option and necessary for some nore than others. Life is flow, and resistance always carries information.
/r/seduction01/07/22 06:23 PM
3

Dont use dating apps. Everything you feel is part of a bigger trend thats been happening since social media and dating apps replaced real life exchanges and vulnerability. My advice, get into volunteering, community classes or workshops and other activities thay have you directly interacting with people. You may not find a partner right away but you will feel more fulfilled and you will stay socialized. Social media and dating apps have an anti social influence on our normal human social skills.…
/r/seduction01/07/22 02:49 PM
1

Yes, go out in the world. Lots of advice on connecting with women and people in youtube. Avoid the pua stuff and you can find lots of ways to get over the initial scariness and connect with women
/r/seduction18/06/22 01:41 PM
-7

Sounds like you prefer doormats.
/r/seduction18/06/22 01:29 PM
1

There's a huge difference between cat calling a woman and actually walking up to her and talking to her about something that's relevant or somehow related To either what you're doing or the environment/place, hell even the weather if you have nothing else- anything but her physical appearance. We're all still animals and pacing is a delicate dance. I think more people ought to try it using their gut instinct instead of heady pua crap that is all about numbers. If you want to connect you have to …
/r/seduction18/06/22 03:10 AM
7

You didnt, my friend, snowface21 said something along the lines of, "have some self respect, dont waste your time on a bitch." So sounds like they are saying spending time with a woman you arent banging is a waste of time... Because shes a bitch and a waste of time, I guess? I dunno makes no sense to me and sounds like a pretty vapid taste in people. I was trying to agree with you, shared0!
/r/seduction18/06/22 02:34 AM
5

Since when does self respect mean disrespecting a whole gender and writing it off as useless beyond ones immediate personal satisfaction. Thats sounds mentally ill and not normal.
/r/seduction18/06/22 01:51 AM
3

I think 3 months is a reasonable amount of time to date someone and figure out if you're going to work well together for a long period of time. As a woman I feel that I have to have a 90 day rule these days. Its like a trial period. You are just going to have to accept that women's sexuality is developed differently than men's sexuality and even then no hard fast rules... I thought we all knew this?
/r/seduction11/05/22 03:12 PM
2

Hire a prostitute.
/r/seduction10/05/22 03:37 PM
2

Focus on getting your life where you want it, then go after a man. You feel nervous because That kind of situation is gonna always keep you feeling powerless and like the guy's got all the control. You need to get your life under control get a job get yourself set up and help your family get on their feet before you go after dating. You'll be much stronger and in a much better place to have a good relationship in the 1st place.
/r/seduction05/05/22 03:23 PM
2

Try something physical like running, martial arts, a sport of some sort. I went ice skating recently that was fun. Get your heart rate up and relieve tension by focusing on something in the now. Even a walk every couple days will get you back into your body and out of your head. At 17 it may also be a confusion about life and how to manage things and that just takes time to learn. Plenty of great life advice on YouTube and many subjects of interest.
/r/seduction03/05/22 03:27 PM
1

Here's how: pick up a mirror, look at yourself and say, "I am a beautiful human being with a heart, who deserves to do things that make me feel good, with other consenting adults, who enjoy sharing physical connection me."
/r/seduction19/04/22 04:00 PM
1

It's a bit esoteric, but I found Human Design helpful in understanding why somethings i tried so hard for worked out less and less and others came so easy...when i learned to let go in the right way and use my gut instincts more, things have been getting easier. You can find your Rave Chart for free online and plenty of videos out there explaining it. Some of it gets really specific about bonding strategies and how it is best for each us to enter into relationships. I've read quite a few charts …
/r/seduction10/04/22 03:39 PM
1

A more polite way to say it is "that the attraction isnt there for you", that way its only about the attraction part and doesn't become about them and their bodies not measuring up for you. Hear the difference? One is just more polite, the other is more pointed at them. You dont have to be pointed when you are honest if you try and only speak for yourself without making any "you" statements even if just implied. If you're being honest without being rude, then yeah, I'd welcome that. But if you c…
/r/seduction04/04/22 09:29 PM
2

Psilocybin. Dont take an epic dose bc that will have you in a puddle. A small amount can have the effect of a glass of wine, but much more giddy, playful. It can increase focus and help stave off addictions. Do it with intention and respect and after a good meal and thats a recipe for a fun sprited night. People are already doing/advertising therapy with shrooms and i heard silcon valley techies frequently use it to increase productivity and focus
/r/seduction22/03/22 12:59 AM
1

You just cant have high quality women without being authetic and "real" sounds like you are trying to avoid being human and you think thats going to help your game with older, more high caliber women. That makes you sounds very confused about how intimacy works. My point is if you want high quality women you are going to have to drop the idea that you can relate to people without having feelings, that just sounds sociopathic and i cant see it working unless you target women who are really out of…
/r/seduction13/03/22 12:46 PM
1

I dont know why you cant just be honest and say "i only want casual sex" theres nothing wrong with that and that way you wont have to lie about your intent which sounds like thats what you are trying to do, be better at not telling the truth.
/r/seduction13/03/22 12:42 PM
1

There is a saying, you can have power over others or you can have connection. You can't have both.
/r/seduction13/03/22 12:41 PM
1

Yeah, to each his own. Worth experimenting and change it up now and then.
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:28 PM
1

Yeah i think the gym is a terrible place to pick people up, but that just me. Im all sweaty, in my zone, doing me and someone wants to interrupt my focus to play games? Dont think so. Im sure some people are into it though, gotta read your audience.
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:27 PM
1

Oh, well thats like how there is all this info out there and meaning but its all relative and each person has more or less depth so more or less capability of comprehending or absorbing information, different levels of "personality" or understanding or humor, etc. Maybe because you are on tinder you are meeting up with a portion of the population that is less focused on depth, so their understanding of personality will be much different than someone coming from a more nuanced or complex backgrou…
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:24 PM
1

Maybe its easier for you to believe that women are just habitually saying something they dont mean. I guess i do not know what your question is, really..
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:18 PM
1

Im just saying, its the arena you're in. They say they want personality, but what does that mean to them? Does it mean they want someone to drive them around, take them out make them feel special? Is that what consistutes personality? Maybe thats part of it. I take it to mean interesting and interested in things. "personality" will mean something different to each person- you have to listen to the nuance and the context.
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:14 PM
1

Yeah, i agree, if they dont have a bio, i swipe left
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:11 PM
1

So youre anti social and you want a way to get the benefit of socialized intimacy but without being truly social? Sounds like you are trying to find a way to be sociopathic but convince people that you are someone they can relate to... ok here's what you have to do- target very young women who dont yet know what its like to tango with a sociopath or self absorbed narcissistic type, they will have the willingness to ignore the signs that you are essentially "faking" initimacy in order to up your …
/r/seduction12/03/22 11:06 PM
1

Yeah i likely playful banter, but i could not take the guy in 2nd conversation seriously at all. Especially when he says "i feel like my heart is going to explode, its your fault for being so cute" ew. Sounds like love bombing. I might get a slight kick out of it, but would raise red flags of emotional immaturity for me and hed be staying in the acquaintance zone. Those lines would only work on very young women, who havent met enough puas yet. not a good long term strategy.
/r/seduction12/03/22 10:42 PM
1

Tinder is such a small fraction of the populace and its a notorious hook up, pump and dump site, is it not? Of course you arent going to get people lookin for personality there, even if they say so. How many empty paragraphs do you see? They want personality in someone, but they offer very little themselves. Its just the nature of a site like that. You want personality? Go to the arenas where people with personality/interests go. The gym is probably the most common, consider also: comedy show, m…
/r/seduction12/03/22 10:30 PM
4

No bathroom pics and step out of the car lol
/r/seduction12/03/22 04:51 PM
1

Im happy to see these responses...😅 😅 i havent shared many and the fear that my privacy would not be respected is a major reason why i dont dare. When i have shared anything remotely scandalous, it was purely for the naive idea of just giving my partner some visual pleasure to show that I know (and care) what they might like and its my way of building connection in a way that my partner can enjoy. I dont know if the level of caring in the intent was percieved or not, but i believe that was the t…
/r/seduction09/03/22 08:02 PM
2

Yes, ive been amazed at how my perspective has shifted just by hearing an old idea phrased in a new way. It does happen on occasion when talking to friends, but those deep talks are few and far between so i use the internet alot to expand my awareness and gain new tactics in an accelrated way. Still takes time to integrate and apply in real life, for sure, practice makes better.
/r/seduction09/03/22 06:30 PM
1

Reading a book by someone who has studied science and put alot of thought into the concepts that are based on real life experience and could be viably applied in the real world is better than failing to ever get a straight answers from people who have other motives or fallable ideas that dont stand the test of time or science; and that maybe have motives that are not in your best interest. If you arent surrounded by high quality people then you arent going to get high value advice from low bar p…
/r/seduction09/03/22 05:27 PM
1

They still have someone there to show them how tho.. basketball skill doesnt develop in a vacuum.
/r/seduction09/03/22 04:52 PM
5

I think he is messing with you :/
/r/seduction09/03/22 04:50 PM
2

Real life practice is key, but i dont know why people are ragging on reading and listening to perspectives to expand your awareness, seems counter intuitive. YES. Read books, listen to podcasts and watch youtube videos. All of these will help you so much! Im a woman, so i have listened to matthew hussey (may help you get insight to struggles on the otherside), esther perel, and a few others who have guests on that deal with these subjects including lewis howes and women of impact. Mostly on yout…
/r/seduction09/03/22 04:45 PM
2

Hiring an escort could be great and a fun way to get your needs met and get exactly what you want. I dont think its a bad idea as long as you check references and make sure you are working with someone who is trusted and reputable. Maybe you can even get some pointers from her about upping your game in a way that works.
/r/seduction09/03/22 04:36 PM
2

I would find someone with a high "lay count" less atractive, tbh. Even the term lay count makes me throw up a little. But to each his own battle with the shared fantasies.
/r/seduction08/03/22 07:18 PM
1

I would respond with, "is there anything you would like to know about me?" Or something like that... Then you may either get a clear no, or a lead-in, beyond her initial, and warranted, hesitation or trepidation. I misread the post... but would just reiterate what happened there. Its not a door closing though if you choose to close it, you can do that. Seems pretty clear to me, one date is not much time and "i dont know you" is a fair and honest response to having a stranger over right after. Im…
/r/seduction06/03/22 05:41 PM
1

My sister is in wroclaw, id like to visit and considering relocating from the states
/r/seduction06/03/22 03:58 PM
1

There is no way to quantify that, is there? You would have to ask her how much of her attraction is based on the real you vs how much is based on the mask you showed her (i assume thats what you mean by "game") and how do you expect anyone but you to know the difference without a psychology degree? People are all so different inside. They could all be doing the same thing but each one is going to have different reasons or motivations for doing things the way they do. I can't see a clear answer t…
/r/seduction05/03/22 06:11 PM
1

Leverage? Subtly? Umm.. Are you trying to get around the possibility that she would observe and be aware of you and what you are doing/thinking/feeling? We are all animals. IF you get away with hiding your motives bc youre dealing with someone who isnt self aware, she is still going to register, but maybe later. To find the question ask yourself what you might like to be asked if you were the one with an interest in something. Everyone has likes, dislikes. Get to know your own and it will help y…
/r/seduction03/03/22 11:32 PM
4

"I was thinking Saturday, does that work for you?" Is she says no, without offering an alternative, you will have to train her to be a little more engaged.. start l with a follow up question... Which day does work for you? If its pulling teeth to get an answer, then that's your answer. People who cant engage halfway shouldn't be dating or bothering with friendship. But naturally, people sign up to be rugs and manipulators, its all about what works or doesnt for you. You don't want to be too open…
/r/seduction03/03/22 09:37 PM
1

It happened to me, but reversed genders... I had the benefit of decades to have it play out in different ways, as we operated in some of the same networks, so we saw each other over the years. A takeaway: Never hang your thoughts on what might have been because you will get stuck in what could be in the future as well. I had more than one sad moment with this fella because i wasnt paying attention to the present moment and what I was moving toward. To get through, at various times; I confided in…
/r/seduction27/02/22 02:31 PM
3

I would argue that given her body language when he saw them, she actually does care about how he feels, but that isn't going to change where her attractions is.. she can both care for him as a person and coworker and care for her best interests and attractions. The two are not mutually exclusive.
/r/seduction27/02/22 01:51 PM
0

The narcisistic and divisive nature of social media is a black swan in the grand scheme of evolution, don't undersetimate how much it seperates us into this and that. If you get out in the real world, sans media, its quite mundane most of the time.
/r/seduction23/02/22 04:07 PM
1

Yep, exactly what is was going to say, psilocybin can alleviate depression and increase focus, used by pros in silicon valley.... Hard drugs deplete your dopamine so avoid or take much smaller doses of the party drugs that are more intense as those hangovers can be even worse than what you've been into. Its the nature and cost of doing something that increases your feel goods so intensely. Coke is an either or thing... from what I've noticed (most) people keep going till they are out or the sun …
/r/seduction22/02/22 04:01 PM
2

Its called seeking arrangements for a reason. High value women seeking a somewhat transactional relationship. The benefit is that you probably won't be dealing with the drama of misunderstanding when things are arranged. High value men know the value of that. Men seeking to game women for "free" who embrace the transactional nature of having specific needs met, are in the wrong lane.
/r/seduction22/02/22 03:23 PM
1

It's a balancing act, and I'm just saying remain open to learning about nuances and "pacing". Curiosity will get you alot more answers than ultimatums.
/r/seduction22/02/22 02:30 PM
1

Unfortunately, I dont think i can make that judgement call, because I am not there to read the body language or tone of voice of the girl you interacted with. I am addressing your response, though, and the potential options you can learn to develop for yourself in how you handle the maybes... You say you normally start avoiding the women who give you indirect rejection... what that conveys is that your attention is an either/or deal. Either they are into you, or they mean nothing.. so in a sense…
/r/seduction22/02/22 02:23 PM
0

I think it might be possible... that while your bold come on is attractive bc you're taking command and letting her know something about you, it is a strong come on... This would be a good moment for some pacing... You don't have to charge in and then expect an absolute... It's too soon for that... She's just become aware of your intent or presence... Let it sink in for a moment. Remain open and kind. You now have her attention, what you do from here will tell her a lot about how you handle the …
/r/seduction22/02/22 02:01 PM
1

Yes, of course, bigger and better and much more important :)
/r/seduction17/02/22 07:12 AM
6

Maybe the roles were reversed, and she felt awkward (or the fear of shaming) for squirting when he didn't? They are still both human, after all.
/r/seduction17/02/22 07:10 AM
3

Consider it practice for the next one. I was asked out by a much younger guy last summer. I was curious, but after some conversation and a date, i realized that the age difference would be a barrier. I didn't think there was any harm in meeting up and talking, getting to know him. But i could see he became attached super easily, after one date. We talked a bit more, but I had to gently let him down. It was hard for him to see why it wouldnt work, but for me it was clear after a few conversations…
/r/seduction17/02/22 03:00 AM
1

An old friend just got engaged to a guy she was living with, platonically, as a roommate, for 3 years before they realized they wanted to date. They seem pretty happy and i think if they can be friends for 3 years, they can be more sure of this marriage lasting. But thats just a real-life example... I don't have any examples of relationships that lasted, which were based solely on instant, physical attraction. Probably mostly bc thats not how women's sexuality works and most of the people i shar…
/r/seduction17/02/22 02:29 AM
1

I'm not sure what mistake you think you made. From what I'm reading, you responded with an attempt to stand up for yourself and you were immediately tested. Don't think they will give up a power dynamic where they can dominate you, easily... That's the thing with throwing barbs, you can most surely expect some return fire. When you are shy, it is natural to feel strange about standing up for yourself if that's not something you normally do. I would chalk up your nerves to that. And the fact that…
/r/seduction16/02/22 11:34 PM
1

Men are just as emotional as women. We just don't recognize abuse, controlling behavior, anger, degradation, vindictive usery, and derision/ slut shaming as emotional outbursts, but they are. And its true, humans in general are not very logical.
/r/seduction16/02/22 09:48 PM
2

Revenge for what?! Not sitting on his dick immediately?! Wow.
/r/seduction16/02/22 09:27 PM
5

Yes, i recently heard a term used in nature, applied to new relational interactions: pacing. Its what two animals do when they've just met, and they aren't sure whether the new creature before them is friend or foe. Most people, especially women who have to be defensive in one way or another, need time to be sure. Women are relationally motivated, often seeking markers of emotional security before sex. If you don't understand, don't make assumptions, be curious instead, and you be amazed at how …
/r/seduction16/02/22 09:24 PM
1

It will probably never be the same; masks will be more accepted in society as they have been for a long time already in asia. We will hopefully lose some of the stigma around mask wearing well as covid related politics, more middle ground and acceptance, I hope.. I can't say how, but things will never be the way they were, but thats the circle of life. Perhaps things can, in turn, be better in the future. But more importantly, I wanted to add that while college years are fun and a great time of …
/r/seduction16/02/22 09:13 PM
1

I am hopeful we will cautiously make our way back to more normalcy this year!
/r/seduction16/02/22 08:57 PM
1

There was a younger guy who i met at a party last summer. Too young for me, but i was intrigued and curious, so we spent a few weeks getting to know each other. He wanted to video chat a lot and was recording me one day, on his video screen, or taking a picture for his mother as he put it, lol. I felt very weird about. So I also have to recognize that I am not someone who is at home with having my image digitzed for later unknown use. . Maybe for a younger person, it is the only choice. But I st…
/r/seduction16/02/22 08:34 PM
1

Part of the damper is an extreme level of narcissism across the board and all the mirrors and projections flare up in this forced solitude. I think dating apps are a breeding ground for the illusion of limitless choice and i dont want to engage someone in that arena because that puts me into a long line of endless choices and i will be told that as if its a threat to shape up and be what they want, rather than being appreciated for what makes me different. its gross. In a network society, there …
/r/seduction16/02/22 08:28 PM
-1

You made all these judgment calls, and maybe that narrative is what is holding you down. I struggle with my own narrative and trying to make friends and I'm a moderately attractive woman. Looks are not everything. I am a very open and accepting person (which now has me hermitting due to high levels of societal narcissism at this time)... but I wanted to point out that me, with my pretty face and dancer's body, I have similar issues, and they stem from inside, as most relational problems do. To y…
/r/seduction16/02/22 05:21 PM
3

Work on your self confidence and the rest will follow. People are highly perceptive and will register your inner feelings on some level, even if you try to hide them. Work on becoming the guy that your dream girl would go for. Your housemate, though well intentioned sounds a bit passive about dating. An attitude of "if a girl likes you, she will let you know" (implication being that you dont need to worry about your efforts in the matter) is one sure way to stay mostly single, barring some fluke…
/r/seduction16/02/22 04:30 PM
1

What this guy said!
/r/seduction15/02/22 09:53 PM
2

The feeling wont ever go away, but you can trick your mind, by trying on a different perspective in the approach. This example is more related to social confidence than just dating, but same idea. One insecurity i had was always worrying about what other people thought about what i had said in casual conversation. Then one day i realized i dont spend any time picking others apart so why would i assume they are doing it to me? I do actually welcome critique, but if they spend alot of energy being…
/r/seduction15/02/22 09:50 PM
4

I love this! I have kissed on a first date a few times (before covid) and to be honest, it was always sort of weird to me. Never led to a 2nd date The issue isnt about being prudish... but felt this projection often. It's just, I've met a stranger in person for an hour or two, after a few surface level messages and it seemed like an expectation or attitude of, ok you seem great but are you a good kisser, bc whats the point of talking to you if you arent? There is nothing wrong with the way i kis…
/r/seduction09/01/22 08:22 PM
2

The Dao of Dating
/r/seduction09/01/22 06:16 PM
3

Sorry that was a bit ranty. Maybe try a dating book/youtubers and then level up to a dominace and submission book. Educate yourself about the dynamics, you're asking to have power over somone else like its a simple 3 step game. For her sake, please read something that the opposite sex would appreciate you reading as well. The Tao of Dating is one that comes to mind.
/r/seduction09/01/22 12:40 AM
7

You cant make people submissive unless you hold them hostage. Someone can choose to submit to you however, if you prove yourself worthy of submission. Understand the basics before you go trying to make someone be what you want them to be or you'll be doing some serious damage in the world. Remember, its an agreement between two consenting adults. If a sub was truly submissive in all senses, there would be no contrast and you'd be bored of your megalomaniacal power in no time, humiliating her out…
/r/seduction09/01/22 12:34 AM
1

Don't dislocate yourself from your body and heart and HER on they way to the big score.
/r/seduction08/01/22 08:16 PM
1

Patience! Nuance! Ever try holding hands? Its so retro. Can be super sexy in the right moment. Nothing says body contact... like body contact.
/r/seduction08/01/22 08:14 PM
2

Yeah, listen to other people being charismatic or funny. When you hear something you like, or could have used somewhere, take a mental note. In time, the ways of humor (which you relate to) will start to bridge in your mind and come to the surface more readily and perfect witty come back will pop into your head at the right moment. Maybe not always, but more and more over time.
/r/seduction13/12/21 02:29 PM
3

So true, understanding the actual kind of calibration that is necessary is the easiest path to a life of fulfillment.
/r/seduction12/12/21 10:22 PM
5

Its actions that convey trust, that create a sense of security and bonding, and then the arousal and deeper bonding. Not sex, then bonding... for most women anyway, even if you dont see that, the steps are different for women. Exceptions, of course, but majority of women are so adept at navigating a man's world that we all take it for granted just how we do it day in day out.
/r/seduction12/12/21 09:47 PM
7

Lol all those girls have you in common.
/r/seduction12/12/21 07:36 PM
3

Not trying to fuck me on a first meeting is different and sets a man apart from the dogs (pre covid ref points, mostly, not enough "data" currently 😆) but only if there is tension or attraction built during and before the date. If the chemistry is tepid, or guy seems cold or dull i could care less, i dont attach much meaning to first dates anymore. Makes it more bearable to get through the "nopes" when i dont take a first meeting personally or too seriously. If a guy is trying to screw me on a f…
/r/seduction12/12/21 07:34 PM
1

I find YouTube very helpful for finding new language for confusing or complicated emotional or interpersonal topics... but if you're going to listen to dating advice on there, try and listen to something that a woman would agree with if she were in the room listening too 😆 there are some slutty f#@k bois out there spewing useless trash, good for a cringe when needed.
/r/seduction03/12/21 05:19 AM
3

As far as building tension, actuator's advice is really good! I'm partial though, because I love dancing tango and wish there were more men in my age group that like to dance too. Its so fun- the physicality, music, and show off a little now and then. It's also a great way to get comfortable with friendly and respectful (not goal-oriented) flirting and/or physical engagement. There are rules and that does help with keeping boundaries clear and some ideas I've taken with me and applied to life as…
/r/seduction29/09/21 03:54 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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