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_the_improving_man Archive

View 0 posts and 60 comments by _the_improving_man on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

The … “increase kcal to 3200 “ …. First order of business, are you taking creatine? If not - try it. All your lifts will start going up 24 hours after your first daily dose. However, then be careful to not go too heavy too early on the lifts (at the 4-6week mark) and introduce strains and tendon injuries.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/25 09:12 AM
0

Your section on “Decision Making” … I just recently finished the audio book from the sidebar “The way of the superior man” … one of the themes is a man’s decisiveness is a gift that the feminine appreciates. You then mentioned ‘’I have to make a clear statement early and stick to it” … you might be right, and always trust your instincts … but just be mindful of the larger leadership consideration of still maybe giving the wife/group what they want, but also shielding them from the responsibility…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/25 09:01 AM
3

Just adding another consideration … the salary bumps are nice but capital gains are better, much better. A stable gov job, consider leveraging up into capital you own - which is a dynamic in the corp world (with layoffs, down sizing and the politics of a French court) that will be ‘harder’.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/02/24 01:48 AM
3

Wrt the kids and you wanting some escape / quiet time … a practise I use that works for me is we have small library corner in another room and I sit in the corner chair and read or work on a laptop on my lap. I tell the kids it is a library and we have to be quiet. They naturally then seem to come in and sit quietly with their toys or a book on the floor. Then if they want to be loud they leave and go to other parts of the house. The books on the wall and the library “vibe” the kids pickup on an…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/02/24 01:30 AM
2

Hi … my thoughts … you didn’t mention it but maybe already on your radar? … now that you are in your own place I would focus on clean eating, just simple proteins (steak, fish, etc) and the vegetables you like and then early to bed early to rise before the dawn and out for a walk. You would be surprised how much better a man feels after he eats a steak or bacon and eggs in the morning and how much your spirit is lifted seeing the dawn each day. Focus on this small locus and from it you can build…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/02/24 01:16 AM
2

Reference point, the movie “The founder” and the first wife. There really is no upside in this evolution for the first wife. Either (1) business sinks wife forced to downgrade or branch swing, or (2) business survives but the man grinds out lots of overtime or (3) the business takes off, founder becomes exceptionally wealthy and upgrades his life - which almost always includes mistresses and/or new wife. With no up side … she just becomes as OP has described.
/r/askMRP22/01/24 06:29 AM
3

The daily breath work you mentioned … I too was amazed just what a significant positive change this makes. I practice just 5 mins, cyclic sighing breath technique from Andrew Huberman YouTube videos. After a week or two, you can then quickly clam yourself in just 1 or 2 signing breaths. Great way to “reset” between environments like meetings at work, coming home, taking a break mid afternoon, even before you fall asleep.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/12/23 11:58 PM
1

Wrt the ADHD …. I have had a similar revelation myself …. The way I am framing it to better server me is along the lines of ADHD attributes evolved in mankind generally within the hunters, rather than the gathers. I like to hunt and in business I like to prospect and innovate. My “ADHD hyper focus” is a superpower, I can sit patiently and wait for game, I can look into all the details of complex business systems and not loose my attention/energy. However it can also make me late for many appoint…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/23 11:50 PM
2

Your comment “I want someone affectionate, nurturing, someone who wants to be with me” …. There was a good recent post about this idea at https://www.reddit.com/r/askMRP/s/3n5UDrPO34 Many would state that genuine affection of a woman to a man just does not exist in a LTR, be it a wife or a plate. However myself and perhaps your own experience, you can feel genuine affection at the start of a relationship. Therefore perhaps you are looking in the wrong spot? What other avenues have you considered…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/23 11:17 PM
1

The last comment about “some of the children … showed up, and friends … but not a single woman he was romantically involved even cared enough to call” .. My thoughts * the deep connection that comes from genetics / blood lines. In my house, from my wife’s point of view - the only person she has no blood connection with is me. The blood line above her and below her (our children) mean infinity more to her. Not at a conscious level, but at a deep sun-conscious, evolutionary psychology level. Think…
/r/askMRP17/03/23 12:59 AM
1

I would echo the above suggestion and just add to it, to try and stay off alcohol for a period - especially spirits. And try and eat a high protein breakfast each morning - e.g. bacon and eggs.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/22 09:45 AM
11

I think many, myself in the past, are just deeply and completely distracted … plugged into the matrix and being sustained by it. All the distractions you mentioned above. But then when you take ownership, like you said above, it is a ton of work and emotions and criticisms from others, all on loaded probabilities of success or failure. Edit … just thinking about this dynamic some more… the next obvious question then is … how does a man start to change ? I think it can only start, really start fr…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/22 02:13 AM
2

The “floor cleaning” exchange with your wife you mentioned above …. another perspective of that situation and the frustrations you felt and she probably felt are examined in Matthew fray’s work (search his name on Spotify podcast). The small insignificant details in our male perspective can translate into huge question marks in a woman’s mind about her feelings of safety with her partner. I am not offering advice … just a information source for a different perspective that I have found helpful. …
/r/MarriedRedPill07/09/22 07:03 AM
2

I agree - the audio version with “expletives” included has a Goggins commentary included through out the book. After listening to it once through, I now just jump into the last chapter to pump the tires.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/08/22 01:13 PM
-2

OYS 10 44yr, 6’3’’, 220 lbs (100 kg); BF 29.1% (DEXA), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) OHP: 25kg (3x4), SQ: 40kg (3x4), DL: 45kg (3x4), Bench: 50kg (3x4) Weight/BF% So I finally got a DEXA scan done. 29.1% Fat - which I is what you guys on here were saying. It is hard to describe how I felt reading this number on the report, sitting in the waiting room at the medical centre. A middle aged, fat man. I have been as low as 97kg recently. But I have not been strict with my di…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/08/22 12:09 PM
1

From my experience and hearing others stories I think the most important part of the MAP process is you have to step away from your daily life and be alone in a different location for at least a few days. A cabin in the mountains, a hotel near the beach, a lake, anywhere you can take walks in nature. Take a note pad, pen and the books you want to read. No tv, no conversation etc … just you thinking. Superman had his fortress of solitude.
/r/askMRP06/05/22 09:42 AM
1

OYS 9 44yr, 6’4’’, 218 lbs (99 kg); BF 16.8% (scales), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) OHP: 27.5kg (3x4), SQ: 40kg (3x4), DL: 40kg (3x4), Bench: 40kg (3x6) (20 kg dumbbells) Reading: Bigger Leaner Stronger (BLS) Weight / BF The last two weeks I have eaten more normally (3x a day). I had a low point bounce of 99.05kg this week. For next week I am continuing my IF , OMAD/2MAD protocol for ~ 3 days of the week. The next step I want to take is, executing protocols to manage m…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/22 02:18 AM
1

OYS 8 44yr, 6’4’’, 220 lbs (100 kg); BF 16.9% (scales), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) OHP: 20kg (3x8), SQ: 30kg (3x6),DL: 30kg (3x6), Bench: 36kg (3x6) (18 kg dumbbells) Reading: Bigger Leaner Stronger (BLS) Weight / BF A feedback item from last week’s OYS … maybe I am skinny-fat?. I looked up the meaning …. yep … that defines my current physique well, especially the working definition from the web of looks skinny with a shirt on, but looks fat with the shirt off. Reaso…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/03/22 02:16 AM
2

Thanks - I sometimes feel those lows I.e. the self doubts. Another is the stress triggers that can force me to eat. Like the markets crashing this week. I will keep grinding, brick by brick, week by week. Stacking small wins. I am not including the bar, the numbers are my weights. I am keeping them lighter and building slowly for a variety of reasons, but mostly as I have never trained the power lifting moves like I am now. The squats, deadlifts and standing over head press. I have also never tr…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/03/22 10:23 PM
2

Thanks guys … When I wrote the comment about me not having a good handle on why we have such parties. … I was wrestling with my thoughts * was it a big covert contract from me? A covert contract I created with my wife, my children, my extended family? * was I LARPing (Live Action Role Playing) - almost certainly. I am just starting to turn the ship around. I am faking it until I make it. * do people really want a party? Instead happy to stay home and Netflix and chill? * However I did change the…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/03/22 09:50 PM
3

OYS 7 44yr, 6’4’’, 222 lbs (101 kg); BF 17% (scales), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) OHP: 20kg (3x6), SQ: 25kg (3x6), DL: 25kg (3x6), Bench: 35kg (3x6) Weight I had a low point bounce of 99.75kg. It is hard to describe how positive this moment was to me. A growing confidence that my health, my physique is getting better and I can control my choices. During 2020 I peaked at 118kg. Gym 3x. Being a better captain I hosted a family party at my house over the weekend. In the …
/r/MarriedRedPill08/03/22 10:27 AM
2

demanding week of work. …. At desk for 12 straight hours during the day Many many events could cause such situations. The challenge for us men is to know what part of the situation we contributed to? Generally what was not done in the past to prevent/mitigate/early warning? Are we ok with it or do we want better? Not just for ourselves, but our team that we are on. The next layer up, is do you want to be a part of such situations in the future? What problems do you want to work on? What problems…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/22 08:13 PM
2

I enjoyed reading your OYS. your “two sentences comment” and abundance, fixing deficiencies etc … My thinking went to my understanding is that in many European countries it is commonly accepted that affluent men have mistresses. Different relationships. Different seasons. Different ages. Different personalities. Different experiences. Variety. Didn’t tony montana say, first you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the woman? Going back to your two sentences aren’t they fundamental…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/22 12:25 PM
2

shoot my load in her mouth … shoot my load on her … I wonder if there is a cheat code in here on how to go after this? Maybe some others know?
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/22 12:03 PM
1

Thanks for feedback. I agree, I still need to maintain focus on lift and stfu. I will restart NMMNG. Start afresh.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/22 10:58 AM
3

I agree. I only gym train on days I am eating normally. IF days I am doing light cardio - swimming or walking. My plan is to get my weight down, just low - medium weights until then. Then at a lower BF cycle protein/creatine over maybe 6 weeks cycles to build strength and then switch to maintenance mode while cutting/IF periods. Frequency / tuning I will sort out when I get to low BF point of approx 11-13%. A plan - that still needs to be verified in the field :)
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/22 03:55 AM
2

I had to look up OMAD/2MAD … I do the same 2 day cycle I run once per week - but I am labelling as IF. I cheat a little atm by using the optislim shakes. They help me take edge off hunger at night and therefore I sleep better. I also have to be careful to avoid coffee on these days as the caffeine + hunger gives me a restless night. My go to meal for OMAD/2MAD is breakfast, scrambled eggs and bacon.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/03/22 09:48 AM
3

Your comments about procrastinating .. the screen / video segment below helped me. I took a screen shot on that part of the video onto my iPad, saved it in an album and then jump to it when I need to break procrastinating. For me it comes around 10am and 1pm. https://youtu.be/4x7MkLDGnu8/?t=3m5s
/r/MarriedRedPill01/03/22 09:36 AM
2

OYS 6 Brick By Brick, week by week 44yr, 6’4’’, 222 lbs (101 kg); BF 23% (navy), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) OHP: 17.5kg (3x6), SQ: 20kg (3x6), DL: 20kg (3x6), Bench: 32kg (3x6) Reading: Bigger leaner stronger, Read: MMSLP Lifting Trained 3x gym. Lots of swimming and a hill sprint session. I can feel my strength coming back. I want to enjoy this journey of rebuilding my strength. Brick by brick, starting from zero. A type of temperance. The phrase in my mind, which I …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/03/22 08:58 AM
1

Thank you - helping me see my own CC weak spots. How can you break that mindset? Hmm I sense I should know the answer to this. But now that I search my memory, I am muddled. Theory from WISNIFG - I think. I need to be more assertive? Fuck - I cannot answer this question properly. Ok - I need to work on my answer to this question. Thank you - awesome feedback.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/22 12:32 AM
1

Thank you for your feedback. ^ Why? I regret to say, somewhat still my dancing monkey. That monkey is not dead yet. But there is also a voice in my head, saying .. just start the work, my mental and mindset evolving can come out later.” Also I have found some pleasures in cleaning my equipment. Cleaning the cars - my self satisfaction is high. yes my lift numbers are correct. In my mind progression will be like a S curve, what I am actually building at the moment is the habit of hitting the gym …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/22 08:57 PM
5

Hi, I just read part of your OYS … Your life section and the realisation you mentioned of needing to be ”..working my arse off at work and working my arse off in life - my house, my family and me” … damn reads exactly like parts of my OYS. I feel your challenge - I share it.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/22 12:27 PM
1

OYS 5 - overwhelmed this week 44yr, 6’4’’, 225 lbs (102 kg); BF 17% (scales), 23% navy, married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) SQ: 17.5kg (3x6), OHP: 15kg (3x6), DL: 17.5kg (3x6), Bench: 30kg (3x6) Reading: WISNIFG, Bigger leaner stronger, Read: MMSLP Lifting Trained 4x in gym. This puts me at 4 weeks 3x each week in the gym - which is a consistent period which I am happy with. Each week adding more volume. I am aiming for consistent weekly progression. Overwhelmed this week I h…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/22 12:06 PM
3

So, to that end, today marks day 3 of no alcohol. That’s step one. Massive, massive, massive step forward - from my experience. Well done! To help fill the void at happy hour time around the house I have two tricks 1. Cranberry juice in a tumbler glass. The color looks like a cocktail, the tumbler glass like I am having a scotch, the sweetness a bit like bourbon and the dry after taste you get from cranberry juice feels a bit like having a neat spirit. I pour my self an inch at a time like you w…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/22 12:30 PM
1

Thank you - I am grateful that you take time out of your day to write me. I feel the community. A type of mateship (as we call it here in Australia) that only exists between men, working together with a shared experience of adversity. Now that I OYS, the MRP community means more to me and my week. I will follow up on your references. I feel like stretching and/or massage is the solution rather than surgery. But I don’t know for sure - hence doctor who I am hoping will do an X-ray. You have to ha…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/22 12:39 AM
1

Thank you for the feedback. The guy who is 22% but thinks he is 14% will hamster himself out of doing anything. I agree. This idea that we as men can think we don’t have a problem and therefore don’t need to take any actions. This blindness can be for a variety of reasons, ego, naive, bad intel, emotions over ruling logic, etc. There is a phrase I picked up that comes to mind. ”A warrior has three eyes, one eye on the opponent, one eye on himself and one eye on the unseen.” Your second paragraph…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/22 12:14 AM
1

Thanks for the advice. I looked at the calipers procedure descriptions online and some talked about one spot, others take measurements over seven spots. The $145 calipers seemed to have a pressure gauge read out on them. So even on the fat pinch - how much pressure do you apply before you take the measurement? I am at day 1 of understanding how to use calipers - lots to learn. I agree with your feedback wrt keep taking scale measurements. That is why I also kept the value in my OYS. At a higher …
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/22 12:05 AM
1

Thanks for the note. I have not tried a DEXA scan or any type of body scan / pod experience. No we are out of lockdowns and back to normal I will aim to try one.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/22 11:55 PM
1

Thanks for the details. I am in NSW. I am sure they are here. I need to try one of the pods you step into - so as to get a base line measurement. Likewise I have a blood work place short listed from before the lockdowns that I need to trial. Again just to base line my measurements.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/22 11:53 PM
8

OYS 4 - Veritas 44yr, 6’4’’, 225 lbs (102 kg); BF 23% (navy), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) SQ: 10kg (3x8), OHP: 10kg (3x8), DL: 10kg (3x8), Bench: 20kg (3x8) Reading: WISNIFG, NMMNG, starting strength, Bigger leaner stronger, becoming a supple leopard Read: MMSLP Lifting Trained 3x in gym. Range of motion feels ok through squat. My right elbow feels tender, but I think improving from weights. I hurt it middle of last year on preacher curls. Weight too heavy without goo…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/02/22 09:27 AM
1

Thanks for sharing that link. I wish I had read that 6 years ago. The last line ”woman want a father” … even their positive response to getting spanked as has been discussed on here by others - adds more evidence to this observation.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/22 04:00 AM
2

Thank you. A lot of good feedback for me to unpack. … I feel a little bad after writing all that, I hope you can handle the heat. I have to. I must. The feedback is all 100% correct - my lifts and BF are shit. They need to be less shit. I did feel the flight or fight response rise up. Then I try to control my emotions, via, inhale, exhale and bite the tip of my tongue. My higher self observing voice within my head, takes over, with ”a flight or fight response is a normal bodily response, it is o…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/02/22 12:33 AM
1

OYS 3 - 10,000 salads lay out in front of me 44yr, 6’4’’, 226lbs (102.9kg); BF 17.3% (scales), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) SQ: 10kg (3x6), OHP: 10kg (3x6), DL: 10kg (3x6), Bench: 20kg (3x6) Reading: WISNIFG, NMMNG, starting strength, Bigger leaner stronger, becoming a supple leopard Read: MMSLP Lifting Moved off zero. Did 3x session in the gym. Lite weights to get myself moving. Nursing tight hamstrings and a right elbow issue. Plans in place to address both issues. I…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/22 08:47 AM
3

Thanks for sharing - very inspirational story. Your physical appearance matters. The difference this has made in my life is ENORMOUS This statement and the comments by others supporting it, has really elevated in my personal priorities. Lift itself is simple, but the intent and the benefits is so much more deeper and therefore of highest importance, especially at the start of the journey. I would ask her for 10 second kisses and she would usually schedule it for later in the day. If all of her s…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/22 04:44 AM
1

As one of the aforementioned offenders - thank you for the kick up the bum - message received. At the moment my head is spinning, so I will focus on getting my weekly actions done with a sense of faith that the personal development growth will come.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/22 09:36 PM
1

Wow - thanks for that feedback. Reading back my words in that last 5% made me question my view of myself. Maybe too much negative self talk? I don’t know? Anyway I can deal with that later in the process. Getting my BF % down next step.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/22 06:44 PM
1

This vision your painted reads well to me, especially the part of me that just wants to fuck pretty girls. I am now mentally preparing myself to have the best chance of stacking consecutive weeks, like you said. Imagine 52x OYS stacked one after the other and my growth between now and then. My OYS 2 process feels like a huge step forward from me a few weeks back reading along but not writing. I bought Starting Strength last night.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/22 07:03 AM
1

Yes sir I am both those things. Impressive deduction. I like the different point of view thinking, sometimes the solution is not within the elements of the problem but outside of it, in a completely separate space. Thanks for the prompt.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/22 06:47 AM
1

Wow - that post is another sledge hammer to my head. This sick feeling that it is coercion that causes the weekly sex schedule atm. That I am un-attractive to her. Ok - time for some changes in me.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/22 10:07 PM
1

… before the interaction I mentioned in my OYS above, I was massaging my wife … damn … my nice guy, covert contract, … creating ”an unspoken expectation of reward” … this places a burden on my wife, hence she is “exhausted” and communicates the frustration of ”another job todo”.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/22 09:21 PM
1

Keep running that dancing monkey program. Reflected on this, this morning at the gym. I feel like I swing between dancing monkey and me doing it for my mission objectives. The dancing monkey comes out like a thirsty man, childish frustrations that the sexual attraction from wife is not flowing. My comments in my OYS … wrt BF 12% and lifting my body weight … dancing monkey if I do X and Y then she will want more. This lacks leadership, lacks mission, I feel like I should go back into myself more.…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/22 09:04 PM
1

You're approaching these priorities from a mindset of scarcity. There's plenty of time to do all of these. You're just spending it doing other things instead. Wow, yes. I was looking at allocating scarce time, effort. Scarcity thinking, my thinking creating limits before the work even starts.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/22 08:55 PM
1

OYS 2 - OYS feedback from last week came true for me this week - my validation seeking behaviours exhaust my wife 44yr, 6”4, 228lbs (103.8kg); BF 17.5% (scales), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) SQ: 0 (not performed), OHP: 10kg (3x 8), DL: 0 (not performed), Bench: 0 (not performed) Reading: WISNIFG, NMMNG Read: MMSLP Mission Working this up. Get my family into a house near the beach? Be the master of my own time and money. Lead my family into healthy and prosperous lives.…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/02/22 09:45 AM
1

Ohhh .. now I think I understand better. Looking up ”Acta non verba” …. translates to ”Actions, not words”
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/22 02:28 AM
1

Damn. I can’t answer this. I don’t know. I think I need to come back to this. Why I have her reactions, within my list of inputs to getting what I want?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/22 01:51 AM
2

I feel like the alcohol was a way to distract myself. Other negative binge style behaviours also within me. The image from one of the posts about the drunk captain on his busted stink boat … really hit me. My busted stink boat is the broken shit I have around the house, my car, my office. My lack of leadership to fix shit. Being sober is the start of my being present, rather than off in my state of denial with my brain swimming in alcohol. At the other end of the spectrum from the drunk captain …
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/22 01:43 AM
1

”No short cuts, go to the gym” …. 100% right, action went to the gym this morning. 1st time back in gym after ~3 months due to lock downs, outbreaks etc. supper lite to get my body moving. OHP 10kg. I don’t know exactly why I have the beach as a thing? I just do, always have :)
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/22 01:31 AM
0

You are right. I do feel the start of the change though, the compass spinning backwards to point squarely at me. It is me who owns this problem, my shit, my broken models, my weak actions, my lazy inactions. The sledge hammer has stopped me and now changed me.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/22 01:23 AM
5

Thank you. The words …you are unattractive rolled around in my head. I fought back, the internal jump to excuses (no family guy can get that fit, I don’t have the time to be more attractive etc). Stopped my thoughts, replaced the internal narrative with ”just do the work for fuck sake”, ”lose the fat”, ”get stronger and be more charming and whatever happens happens” Could I be be bad? Go after what I want? At the moment it genuinely feels impossible to me inside my head.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/01/22 01:17 AM
3

OYS 1 - drunk captain, sobering up, cleaning up and angry with himself 44yr, 6”4, 227lbs (103kg); BF 17.4% (scales), married 13 yrs (20 together), 3 children (all under 12) Background I discovered MRP 12 months ago, have drifted in and out over that time. Reading the OYS weekly and hearing your stories has been an incredibly positive experience. So what is different now to cause me to OYS #1, i think it was from reading recent “Put your ego in Box” post that it dawned on my that I had not commit…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/22 11:22 AM
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