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alwaylearning47 Archive

View 2 posts and 30 comments by alwaylearning47 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
17

Getting Startedalwaylearning47/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 10:13 AM
13

Dealing with the Ex / STBXalwaylearning47/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 11:27 AM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
-1

No cheating, abuse, addiction, yet she hurt you. I still feel like something is missing here. She says you're not giving her what she needs but you're the one that's hurt. I'm not saying you're trying to rename the narrative, but I feel like there is a piece of the puzzle we're missing.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 05:02 PM
-2

What brought on the need for a divorce?
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/26 04:40 PM
6

Put her on ignore. If she wants to get in contact with you, it can be through your attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 12:00 AM
3

Good on ya, man. Making the best of a sad situation, working on yourself and putting your relationship with your kid upfront is fantastic. Sounds like you're doing rather well and set yourself up with a good support system. Happy for ya.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 12:24 PM
2

At this point, it's not worth saving.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 10:24 PM
1

It's possible, yet highly unlikely. And even if she has been, at this point, I wouldn't be upset about it. I would just wonder why she wants me to stay so badly.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 10:23 PM
1

Oh, and I took that test for myself and scored 12 out of 48. So good for me, I guess.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 10:20 PM
2

It's really messed up. One thing I didn't mention is that she has been open to me getting what I need elsewhere for sometime. Now she's really pushing for me to take advantage of it if it will "help our marriage". She is doing everything except literally bending over backwards to try to save a dead marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 10:19 PM
2

Yikes, that sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 10:10 PM
2

Ok, so I just took a BPD test according to everything she has told her she has felt and what I know. On Psych Central, she scores a 36 out of 48. I'm so fucked.....and not in the good way
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 10:04 PM
2

Not sure, going to have to figure that out somehow.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 09:49 PM
1

Unfortunately there isn't.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 07:29 PM
5

And next time, read it all before talking.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 09:22 PM
5

It's not just unhappy, it's WHY unhappy. And I'm not some boomer that just picks up a hobby because my marriage sucks. I want a partner, not a roommate.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 09:21 PM
2

Is that what you did? How well did it work?
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 05:49 PM
6

Yeah, I get all of that. Doesn't make it any easier though. I have started setting things up quietly to protect myself. It's just hard, but I know I deserve better. Hell, I would still love to have kids. Isn't gonna happen here. So many reasons to move on for my own well being.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 05:12 PM
1

Yeah, the first problem was letting religion guide you. And concerning kids, I sometimes wish my parents divorced. I would rather have been from a broken home than a toxic one.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 03:31 PM
4

I'm lucky in that we couldn't have kids, which also hurt our marriage for a while (for her more than me since I'm usually good at accepting the reality of a situation). I feel like a caretaker a lot as well. And I know she manipulates as she will do something like vacuuming and it'll be so bad, I have to go back over it later and she will then get upset that she can't do anything right. So then I just stop asked her to do it and do it myself. This is why I do most of the cleaning, cooking, laund…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 02:46 PM
3

Yeah. It's so hard because she's my wife, the one I chose. She's the one with the feelings issues. I still love her as the person I spent 24 yrs married to, 26 years together total. I haven't been happy for a long time, but have tried to work on things. This was the final straw, but I can't just turn the feelings off. So I don't want to see any harm come to her, but it is clearly over and I need to work on moving on. It is going to be expensive to move out on my own, and I get that. But I just c…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 02:15 PM
2

That doesn't sound so bad. It still feels hard, but yeah.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 02:05 PM
2

Ok. I don't know exactly how serious she is. I have actually dealt with a friend when I was a kid that tried to kill himself. There were no signs I saw and he never said he was going to do it. So I get that part. I will definitely look in to BPD, thanks.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:45 PM
1

Get the test done. You need to protect yourself financially and legally. If the kid isn't yours, you can still treat the child as yours. Knowing the truth doesn't mean it has to affect how we are.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:30 PM
2

Calling the cops just feels like a big leap. I'll keep it in mind though.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:08 PM
2

An interaction log, great idea.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:08 PM
2

Thank you for sharing that. It's good to not feel alone in this development.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/24 01:07 PM
2

I'm apprehensive about reading a book pushed my Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly. We don't come even close to seeing eye to eye on anything.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 06:54 PM
0

I have tried. Talking about feeling, needs, therapy, hell even taking one for the team and accepting blame for something that was her fault just to not have her feel bad and avoid a fight.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 05:44 PM
4

That's a great point. Get the details done first. Thanks!
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 11:04 AM
0

It's something that going to have to happen, but I know it's still gonna break her heart. This isn't gonna kill me, but I am expecting it to be rough AF.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 10:54 AM
2

Yeah, not what I was hoping for, but exactly what I expected. Thank you. I appreciate your help.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 10:29 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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