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anothercollegehoe Archive

View 0 posts and 32 comments by anothercollegehoe on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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CBT and DBT therapy helped me realize that I was attracted to very tall, super muscled men because as a victim of childhood abuse, I sought out men that I felt would protect me. Therapy helped me accept that the abuse was in the past and I’m safe here today, so now I’m also attracted to men that don’t fit that mold and have had a serious relationship with a short, not that muscular, soft and effeminate man. However, I am still much more attracted to those who are hyper masculine. Therapy definit…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 06:41 PM
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Interestingly, people who want “unattainable shit” and actually get it are often harming themselves in the long run. Scientific research has shown that women who marry men that are more attractive than them (abbreviated as L.A. for this reply) face significant issues with self-image and self-worth, perhaps as a result of it. Compared to their attractive women married to attractive men counterparts, L.A. are much more likely to participate in extreme dieting and close weight regulation. In contra…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 06:36 PM
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I think I get what you’re trying to say. Studies have shown that women from poorer countries with worse health are attracted to more stereotypically masculine men whereas women from more wealthy, educated areas are attracted to more effeminate men. Research has shown that this is due to women from poorer backgrounds seeking mates that fill a protector role and women from the wealthy backgrounds prefer emotionally intelligent mates. The idea behind this being that since women from the wealthy, ed…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 06:21 PM
9

And I also don’t appreciate you insulting me. I don’t want a man who works out because six packs are sexy. I actually don’t find six packs attractive. I want a man who works out because it’s a common interest that impacts my life heavily- out of my hobbies, it’s the one I spend the most time doing. Furthermore, I want a man who’s physically fit because I don’t want to be stuck taking care of someone who neglected their health. Yes it’s nice that working out makes me more physically attractive, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:56 PM
6

Maybe you just have chosen to associate with some overall shitty people? All my girlfriends are of similar mindsets to me and all are open about it with men. These pervasive beliefs you’re referencing aren’t things that would make you attractive to women but rather things that if you fail to do would make you unattractive. Those are very different things. I don’t want a man who has to put effort into treating me with respect and being clean and hygienic. Those are not wants, those are bare minim…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:50 PM
3

There should absolutely be more protections in place for intimate partner violence victims in divorces. My mother was the perpetrator in my family and when my dad looked for resources to help, he found that most weren’t actually willing to help a male victim. My sister and I were both teenagers but our word to the court that she was abusing us wasn’t considered credible. We had to spend 4 months with weekly custody switches where we were being horrendously abused before my dad was able to accumu…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:46 PM
1

Do you think your dad had any clue your mom would react to divorce that way? I’d think most of the time you know your spouse well enough to know how they’ll handle it. My mom checked every box listed in this post but my dad knew she would. Prior to filing he contacted an attorney that specialized in divorces where the man was a victim of abuse and took steps to protect himself. He installed cameras and made sure to not be alone with her and had her served when my sister and I would be out of tow…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:42 PM
2

I second what you’re saying, not always but often there’s early signs that indicate this would happen. My mom fell into the vandalize property and accuse dad of molesting the kids category in my parents divorce. Now a decade later, my dad has opened up to me that there were clear red flag indicators before they got married that my mom was seriously mentally ill and psychotic. He said post partum made her a million times worse and he had no way of predicting that, but by the time he was filing fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:36 PM
3

I’m not denying that what you’re describing absolutely does happen, but you’re acting like that’s always the case. In my parents divorce, my mom claimed my dad molested my sister and I. My mom called the cops on my dad and said he had hit her. I’ve got countless other examples and not once did it ever cause significant issues for my dad. All it took was 5 minutes in front of a judge for those accusations to get tossed. None of my parents friends or associates believed my mother or exiled my fath…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:30 PM
0

Yeah as a woman who has slept around in the past, I definitely didn’t do it for validation. I already had plenty of that. I actively chose to participate in hookup culture but I’m one of the only girls I know that did.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:18 PM
3

I’m a woman with a very high sex drive, so much so that I would group myself with men in terms of libido, but I’m fully aware that I am not the norm. Just like how there are some men out there who aren’t that interested in sex, there are hyper sexual women out there. But it definitely isn’t typical
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:16 PM
5

Yeah I’d argue that high value women actually often do the chasing, not so much in the fact they desperately chase men, but that they’re confident enough to approach men first and initiate
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:12 PM
18

Clearly you have some sort of misconception about what a high value man is because I don’t know any women that consider a man with multiple baby mommas to be high value. In fact, myself and my friends wouldn’t even consider going out with a man with multiple kids by multiple different women
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:10 PM
9

What characteristics do you think women claim to want? Because I get the feeling you’re thinking the wrong ones. Obviously it varies by woman, but I’m pretty upfront that I want a physically fit, college educated man that’s financially secure and conventionally attractive. I don’t go around saying physical traits don’t matter. I want someone whose compatible in terms of lifestyle with me, and I go to the gym everyday, manage my budget reasonably, am intelligent, and above average in the looks de…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 05:07 PM
3

I think a lot of people also overlook the fact that women don’t necessarily feel safer around “nice guys.” Studies show that men most prone to intimate partner violence are those who are hyper masculine and those who are the opposite end of the spectrum. Men who struggle with masculine discrepancy stress (not feeling man enough) are just as prone as hyper masculine men to being perpetrators of IPV. source 1 source 2
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 04:17 PM
0

I have lots of empathy for men. But I don’t believe women owe men anything. And for me as an American women, when only 27.4% of men are at a healthy weight source that does mean that a lot of men simply aren’t attractive enough to go out with. Not only are they not as physically attractive due to their obesity, but as someone who works out 5 days a week and eats relatively healthy, I’m attracted to someone else who shares that same lifestyle. Most American men are simply fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/23 01:48 PM
1

How do you not know? Like are you not self aware?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/23 01:45 PM
1

I have genuinely never made fun of a man that’s hit on me in a bar and considering I spent 20-25 working in a night club, that’s a lot of men. It’s a myth. I have made fun of men that despite never holding a conversation with me randomly message me asking if I want to see their dick
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 07:02 PM
1

I think a huge part of this is the internet exaggerating things. I’m 25, conventionally attractive, live in a major US city, and want kids. Almost all my female friends are the same way. I know very few women that don’t want kids
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 06:59 PM
21

Chiming in as a 25 year old that’s had a few age gap relationships, for me it’s out of genuine concern. Yes I’ve had a single age gap relationship (24 and 39) where despite being in drastically different places in life and having incredibly different financial means, we had an overall very healthy relationship. The others I’ve been in, specifically one where I was 19 to a 44 year old man, was incredibly skewed. He constantly put me down for not being as accomplished as he was, made me question m…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 06:52 PM
5

The loneliest I’ve ever been was when I was having tons of sex. Not having sex doesn’t make you romantically lonely- the lack of genuine connection does.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 06:34 PM
14

I’m a single woman. I’m not lonely because I have an abundance of close, meaningful friendships. It took time and effort to cultivate those. Yet so many men equate loneliness to a lack of dating. Why would I want to date someone that doesn’t have friends? I have a life outside of you, I want you to have a life outside of me
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 06:32 PM
5

As an objectively attractive women, half the men that hit on me are below average in terms of attractiveness. I’ve known many average to ugly men who complain they don’t get dates, then show me their dating apps and they’re only swiping right on 8-10s despite being in a 2-5 range themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 06:30 PM
28

Most guys I’ve met that complain about trouble dating and lack of matches on dating apps have objectively been below average in the looks department. But then they show me the girls they’re swiping on, and it’s all girls who are 8-10s. I’m not sure if they just delusional about their own level of attractiveness, but most conventionally attractive people are going to date other conventionally attractive people. They have no sympathy to the below average women that they’d be more likely to have su…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/23 06:13 PM
1

I think the female equivalent is a short woman. I know this post is all about height but I don’t actually know anyone that uses it as a dealbreaker really, it’s a preference and how strong that preference is varies by person. I think for men it’s less important but the preference is there. I like tall men because they make me feel protected and the guys I’ve dated have told me they find me shortness attractive for the Same reason, it’s this like protector thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 06:24 PM
2

I think the niches thing is the key to dating. I’m conventionally attractive, and all through college I wore fake tanner and dyed my hair blonde and wore my contacts. In the past 2 years I’ve gone back to brunette and I wear my glasses half the time and I realized men loved it. I found my niche. I’m a brunette with huge round glasses and big boobs. I look like a sexy Librarian. It works.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 06:17 PM
1

Speaking as a short woman (5’2) with a tall sister (6’) it absolutely impacts it. We’re only a year apart in age and both considered conventionally attractive. She’s actually prettier than me tbh but I get hit on astronomically more, probably 10X the rate she does. It’s a combination of a lot of men being attracted to specifically short women (the guys I’ve dated have said it’s cute how small I am and they feel like my protector) and that most men are not willing to date someone that tall, regar…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 05:42 PM
1

Too tall of a man is 100% a thing for short women. I’m 5’2 and anyone 6’4+ doesn’t really work for me. It’s really awkward to kiss and hug and it actually makes Sex kinda difficult sometimes, and eliminates some sexual positions entirely. My last boyfriend was 6’4 and we could only really comfortably have sex in 2 positions, which you get bored of if that’s all you ever do.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 05:34 PM
3

I think you hit the nail on the head here. Confidence is one of the most important factors in dating yet people tend to talk about it the least.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 05:27 PM
3

I’m only 5’2 but my sister is 6’ and tall women definitely have a very hard time dating. She doesn’t care if her partner isn’t as tall as her, though she tends to go for guys within a few inches of her height. She’s very conventionally attractive but because she’s so tall a lot of guys aren’t willing to date her, even guys that are still taller than her. It might not be as bad as being a really short guy, but it still has a massive impact on dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 05:19 PM
3

this entire response is comically out of touch, but what really got me was that you’ve known women who say they like short guys but still reject short guys. You realize that wouldn’t make her like all short men right? I like tall men but I’ve still rejected a lot of tall guys
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 05:13 PM
21

I don’t understand why you restricted this to women, it’s just as much of a thing the other way around. Men want women that are attractive enough to easily sleep around and who love sex, but haven’t slept around. Men want someone whose a slut but just a slut for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/23 05:04 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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