| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 8 | Moving into an apartment | Living Situations | beenthere7777 | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/09/25 10:14 PM |
| 6 | Separation before figuring out divorce | Getting Started | beenthere7777 | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 01:47 AM |
| 6 | How did the conversation start? | Getting Started | beenthere7777 | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/08/25 12:44 AM |
| 0 | Anyone here do an assumable mortgage? | Getting Started | beenthere7777 | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/12/25 02:21 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2 | HOW DO I LET GO?A book I'm reading is called "We can do hard things", I like it. It has helped me. I also see a therapist that has helped. One of the chapters is titled "How do I let go", so it might help you too. On Amazon it's like $11. I borrowed mine from my local library. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/07/26 07:16 PM |
| 3 | Did you initiate the divorce and are you happy now?I initiated and I am happier in some aspects and others not. I was married for 23 years and together for over 25. Over those years I lost my individual friends and many of them became couple friends. So when I left many of, actually all of them, sided with her and left me alone. She has a huge support network while I have nothing. I do enjoy my alone time, but I don't like being alone all the time. I've started seeing a therapist and trying to figure out what the next steps are. I kind of feel l… | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/26 07:13 PM |
| 5 | Anyone willing to admit they actually regret leaving?Yes... I regret it. I initiated it but feel I was too hasty in my decision making process. Nothing was not beyond repair but I think in retrospect I was taking the easy way out but know now after almost seven months of separation it was indeed not the easy way out. We are actually working on reconciliation now. I'm in counseling and have told her I'm open to marriage counseling. We have been seeing each other more and more and it looks like we will reconcile. I feel I should have been more hones… | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/04/26 01:58 PM |
| 1 | 19F trying to understand my dad better after divorce — any advice?I'm not yet divorced, but I am separated. And I have a daughter that is exactly your age. But I would say to have you understand is your mom and your dad will likely never tell you the entire story of why they got divorced. My daughter pushed me to tell her the reason why I wanted to leave. And I told her I would not. I told her I would never tell her the entire story because our relationship is not public information. I would also say, you should really try to understand each one of their persp… | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/03/26 12:56 AM |
| 1 | Anyone here do an assumable mortgage?We did. Chase Bank is who we are with and our mortgage is applicable but told us a generic cost estimate of up to 6%, which is really unhelpful. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/12/25 02:40 AM |
| 1 | Marriage rantMy opinion is, don't wait... Kids are resilient and I have a friend that got divorced when his kids were like 10 and 12, and now they are older they are very well adapted into 2 households without issues. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/11/25 04:54 PM |
| 1 | Marriage rantOp, I am almost in your same situation. Not in trt but had similar revelations over the past couple of years. My kids are now adults and find myself with a roommate with zero intimacy and really no real desire for her anymore. I am telling her I am leaving and getting a divorce after Thanksgiving. We have been married 23 years and the past 5 have been pretty brutal to take, but I stuck it out for the kids, I know I know, but didn't want to leave them and miss HS life. I'm not telling you to stic… | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/11/25 02:55 PM |
| 1 | Divorce & HolidaysI'm in the same bucket as you OP. Though my kids are adults now, 18 and 21. I plan on telling my STBXW in beginning December and discussing the way forward with the kids. I'm sure she will agree not to ruin the Christmas, so I'm going to propose tell the kids December 28th and me move out the next day. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/25 09:05 PM |
| 1 | (47). Not yet divorced.I have started the process. Mainly mentally but also getting the plan in place. We won't do attorneys as we discussed her brothers divorce last year and said it's a complete waste of money. We both make about the same amount and we have similar assets, so it will be you got yours I got mine and see ya. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/10/25 06:58 PM |
| 7 | (47). Not yet divorced.I feel you. I'm 50 and been in a dead bedroom for at least 10 years, been married for over 20 as well. Longest we went was 20 months in between. That's when I began to truly think about divorce. I brought it up for years and years with her never wanting to caring to fix. Kids are now adults and my plan is divorce her after the new year. This was not the only reason for me wanting to leave, controlling, neglectful, selfish, does not know how to reciprocate or show appreciation, the list goes on. … | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/10/25 07:38 AM |
| 1 | Moving into an apartmentThat's a good perspective. I appreciate it. Oh but I already have an air fryer so that goes with me. Lol fucking love that thing | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/09/25 10:45 PM |
| 10 | We broke upOP, I feel for you. I've been in a dead bedroom for probably around 10 years now. I've communicated to her multiple times how important intimacy is it's not just the act of sex but actual closeness of the act. She's made no attempt to remedy the situation after years and years. I've been married for almost 23 years and I stayed because I didn't want the kids to grow up with a dad not at home. My kids are now adults, I'm ready to make the jump to a single life again. It wasn't just the dead bedro… | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/09/25 01:11 PM |
| 2 | Moving into an apartmentThat's kind of what I think will happen to me. I plan on maybe a year, two at the most. But still, I went and looked at some apartments today and I'm like, I designed and built my own house and I'm going to this. I guess at the same time it doesn't matter too much because I'm not coming home to a toxic neglectful relationship. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/09/25 12:22 AM |
| 3 | She would never cheat, right?Got it. She can keep the house, I'm going to move out but I don't know how to structure it. Like hey over the next two weeks I'm moving out all my stuff, or I'm going to come get stuff as I need it. I don't know | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/09/25 01:21 AM |
| 4 | She would never cheat, right?This might be a little bit too private and you don't have to answer if you don't want to, did you move into an apartment or did you move into a house? I'm actually going to look at apartments today for when I plan on moving out. When you left, how did that work exactly? As in moving your stuff out, did you just grab your stuff and leave or did you move out like over a period of time? I'm trying to figure out what to say to her when I move out. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/25 06:49 PM |
| 7 | She would never cheat, right?OP, how are you doing in your separation? I'm in a similar situation, though my wife is not cheating, I've been married for 23 years and I'm going to be leaving soon. Kind of curious how living on your own feels now after being with someone for so long. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/25 01:26 PM |
| 3 | Does anyone ever figure out the truthOP, every thing you said could have come out of my mouth. I'm getting ready to go though exactly what you are going through. Twenty three years of marriage here and truly the exact same description of what you have been through. It's tough but I'm looking to the future and not the past anymore. We are resilient, we will adapt and succeed once again. And as the saying goes, every end is a new beginning. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/25 07:18 AM |
| 6 | [UPDATE] 6 Weeks Post-Divorce – The Loneliness Feels Unbearable. I Need Help.Go workout. Working out releases endorphins and makes you feel happy. Easier said that done but when I work out it really helps me when I'm down. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/08/25 05:50 PM |
| 2 | How did the conversation start?Oh man, that is terrible.. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/08/25 01:38 AM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceThank you. I'm really leaning towards leaving after the new year. Getting everything in order then making the jump. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/08/25 11:20 PM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceAnd be unhappy for the potential of the rest of my life... I don't think so. I'd rather be single then stay where we loathe each other. Staying could work out and leaving could be shitty, I'd rather live in regret than never to experience what might be on the other side. Being "roommates" with no prospect of intimacy is not a way to live, imo. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/08/25 06:56 PM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceThank you. I get that. If that's where it leads, then that's where it leads. But I think a separation is the lowest threat at this point. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/08/25 02:02 PM |
| 2 | Separation before figuring out divorceThank you. I appreciate that. I know from a past experience with one of her siblings going through a divorce, we will not go through that process because of the ridiculous amount of money that is spent on it, and I think that we would be level-headed enough and smart enough to be able to divide up everything. Honestly, she can have the house, she can keep her 401k, I have my own 401k. We have both made similar amounts of money and salary our entire time together. I would just want to be free and… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 03:02 PM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceActually talked to my best friend yesterday about the situation which I've never opened up to anyone else besides an anonymous person on the internet, he is divorced and has been for 10 years and is with someone else now. He was with his wife for 10 years when they started counseling, and he said it only made it worse. It made the hatred and resentment come to the top and it made it even more difficult through the divorce proceedings. I don't think I will do counseling because I think it's going… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 02:46 PM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceThank you for your response. I appreciate it. I've been talking to her about our problems for the past, at least 3 years. There has been no change whatsoever. You might see in one of my other comments, we went almost two years without sex. And many of our conflicts have been discussed at lengths with her not taking any real ownership of problems inside the relationship. Everything is basically my fault. Which I know you're hearing this one-sided from me, I will take ownership for my problems, bu… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 02:13 PM |
| 3 | Separation before figuring out divorceHonestly, I've talked to her about this for years and years. We went two years without sex, not because of me but obviously because of her. She's always used sex as a rewarding mechanism, like if you do this for me I might have sex with you. I would say our last conversation about our problems was about 2 months ago, what has changed, absolutely nothing. That's why I feel I'm at my last straw. She always thinks that I'm the problem in the relationship and never takes any ownership from what her … | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 02:11 PM |
| 2 | Separation before figuring out divorceI appreciate your response. I will take that under consideration for sure. My only thing about that is the time aspect of it, I mean, do I wait another 2 years to see how it unfolds and figure out nothing's changed, then I just wasted two more years of my life. I've been beating the same drum with her for many many years, I really don't think that, in my opinion counseling is going to do anything for her to change. I think the only thing that really is going to make her change is the idea of me … | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 01:14 PM |
| 1 | Separation before figuring out divorceOh yeah... Many times. I'd say we been shaky for at least 7 years and me thinking about leaving for 3. During those years we have had many discussions of how to fix us but it's always I'm the one needs fixing and not her. So I fix what she needs but she does not seem to care what is needing fixing from her side. That really brings me to where I am today. I think when she had kids, she was a good mother but forgot how to be a good wife. I feel I'm been neglected for years and now and the resentme… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/08/25 10:20 AM |
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