bigolswole Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
16	I still miss her... It’s worth looking into to try detachment. That’s what women do to break their emotional bond and abandon men. You’re focusing on her positives. You’re pedestalizing someone who chose to betray you and consider you rubbish to leave behind. Consider ruminating on the betrayal and ways she caused you to hurt over the years. Her coldness towards you now and the lack of I’m sorry or answers to anything. Get angry, deal with that anger in healthy ways and DON’T INVOLVE HER IN THIS PROCESS. I repeat, …	/r/Divorce_Men	16/11/23 01:50 AM
1	Dating after divorce I find this kind of statement more common from men who took a huge financial hit from the divorce. Getting your money and life basically legally taken away at gunpoint by a judge causes real deal trauma and this seems to be some sort of PTSD inflicted defense mechanism against any future repeat.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/11/23 04:37 PM
1	Dating after divorce I went complete 180 and shut down at the end. My ex got into this whole “my feelings are valid” phase and was saying some very untrue stuff about me that was part of her whole detachment, blame avoidance phase. So one day I calmly stated, if all your feelings are valid, mine are too. Here’s how it makes me feel when you… She literally had a tantrum and lost her shit. This validate everything stuff was from her therapist. It was truly poisonous. Her feelings were valid, if I said anything or expr…	/r/Divorce_Men	15/11/23 04:30 PM
1	Dating after divorce Well that isn’t an option for me lol. I really miss a woman’s touch and companionship. There’s something about their demeanor, their shape and curves, their softness and sensitivity, the smell of their lotions and sprays, their way of seeing things and communicating… it all somehow provides a nice balance to who I am as a man. I have learned that the deep questions of life thoughts and the doubts and fears stuff is better left to share with your close men friends. That is 99% of the time not to …	/r/Divorce_Men	15/11/23 03:48 PM
1	Dating after divorce I made the mistake of being duped by the romantic love mythology during my marriage. I started out independent and very much my own man, but near the end I look back and don’t even recognize myself. I thought if someone loved you they were the person you could open up to and that women actually wanted this. They don’t, no matter what they say. Women often want and need contradictory things. Men should figure out what does she need vs what she wants. Does she want you to tell her everything and s…	/r/Divorce_Men	15/11/23 01:32 PM
9	Re-entering Dating Scene Im I’m the same boat. Almost 20 years together, separated a year ago, divorce signed in July. I downloaded Hinge and Bumble but just can’t bring myself to make a profile. It seems so lame to use an app. I know the world has changed and they’re the new normal, but I’m old school and apps just have this desperate vibe to me. I keep hitting the gym, pounding the weights trying to reach some idea of perfect. I know it’s likely because of trauma but at least it’s gym and not whiskey. I am going out o…	/r/Divorce_Men	15/11/23 12:41 PM
1	Why is insecurity so unattractive? Find a copy of the book No More Mr Nice Guy. Save yourself from the inevitable hell your mindset will lead you to. Just do it. You are codependent af.	/r/seduction	23/10/23 01:35 PM
43	"Be authentic" is terrible advice Dude, you need to work on yourself before you attempt a relationship. In your current state, the only kind of woman you will attract will be a basket case with a personality disorder.	/r/seduction	08/10/23 08:12 PM
-1	"just move on" is NOT good advice OP ain’t wrong. This stuff is nuanced.	/r/seduction	06/10/23 01:42 AM
40	I had sex with a girl that I actively tried to NOT meet - If she likes you, she likes you Goblins lol	/r/seduction	01/09/23 01:07 PM
1	The Third Adam I can’t force anyone to go do something if they aren’t willing. I agree about the current state of the church. There were people within the church we were in, actively pushing her towards “following her heart.” The pastor is the one that suggested a “separation towards reconciliation.” Then he did counseling for a week and said he didn’t want to anymore. I never heard from him again until I told him to remove me from the membership roll.	/r/RPChristians	11/08/23 07:51 PM
3	The Third Adam He’s right. I just went through a divorce and the first part describes a lot of the crap I heard my ex wife say. It seemed spiritually demonic how she became, convinced of her holiness and inner light. Ugh. I’m disgusted	/r/RPChristians	28/07/23 09:13 PM