| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2 | Men who went to therapy during or after the divorce. What did you learn?It really helped me unfuck my world view i had gotten stuck in. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/08/25 12:42 PM |
| 10 | Wtf is this even?Dont leave your house. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/08/25 12:13 PM |
| 1 | 50/50 Custody and Job RelocationDon't move. The one that moves loses the kids unless you are willing to pay your ex to move. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/07/25 07:43 PM |
| 1 | Cash outLol if they want it they will find it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/07/25 07:41 PM |
| 4 | Wedding Ring?Some metal detectorist will enjoy finding it! | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/07/25 02:06 PM |
| 2 | How did you press on; when they rewrote truth and turned everyone against you?Fuck em. If they believe you're the problem then they aren't your friends anymore. Time to restart life bucko. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/07/25 02:05 PM |
| 2 | What to do with social media posts?In my opinion it is still part of your story. Its just life that it didn't work out. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/07/25 02:04 PM |
| 2 | Too much free timeI built a big ass bird feeding station to watch | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/25 11:40 AM |
| 6 | How do you get your confidence back?Find a woman that actually loves you for you | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/25 11:32 AM |
| 6 | Handling Abuse AccusationsHey that's what my wife did! Except we have kids so I have to keep seeing her. Just keep your cool throughout the process. In the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter. Yes you lost friends but as you said, that's just the cost of divorcing. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/25 11:15 AM |
| 1 | Seperated, soon to be ex wife is pregnant with another mans child. How to proceed in court so I don't have to pay child support or spousal support?Idk the laws in California, ask an attorney. Odds are your divorce is going to take long enough she can't hide she is pregnant. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/06/25 02:54 AM |
| 1 | Seperated, soon to be ex wife is pregnant with another mans child. How to proceed in court so I don't have to pay child support or spousal support?In your discovery documents they should ask who and when she has been having sex with. They asked my ex that for the specific reason of if they show up pregnant you can show its not yours. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/06/25 07:25 PM |
| 2 | Wife set to say "I don't feel safe"My ex recorded the hour of her packing her stuff and leaving and every single exchange we did eith our kid. They will record everything. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/25 03:06 AM |
| 3 | Wife set to say "I don't feel safe"My wife claimed i was abusive and she didn't feel safe. As long as there are no hospital visits or police records you should be good. Also quit saying mean things because she will 100% record you in your next fight. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/25 03:05 AM |
| 2 | What sort of woman stops a man from having his kids 50/50 for no reason?!Take her to court. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/25 03:04 AM |
| 1 | unresponsible soon to be ex wife financiallyGo to a lawyer and figure out the best way to protect yourself. Also women believe it is so easy to take the kids but it's not. Over half the states have 50/50 as the law. Just dont be a POS and it'll be fine. My ex did limit me to only weekends for a whole year but it all worked against her because it showed she wouldn't listen or cooperate. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/25 03:03 AM |
| 2 | Well… I’m fucked.Dude it sounds awful dealing with that day in a d day out. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/25 03:00 AM |
| 2 | Seeking Advice about Ex's boyfriendLol same. They are going to be crazy no matter what. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/05/25 04:36 PM |
| 1 | Do you all get your children’s mother gifts for Mothers Day?Me? No. Did I help my toddler do some art flowers? Yes. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/05/25 04:32 PM |
| 3 | Should I be trembling my stbxw is shopping for this?Well at least you know she is crazy and can blame it all on that | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/05/25 04:20 PM |
| 1 | Those of you who had wives who “changed” after marriage or children.Dude you gotta help your son. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/04/25 07:26 PM |
| 8 | update # 1: She's upset that I moved on so quickly - and she's the one who leftYes on the distorted image thing. 80% of guys are just normal. So to justify blowing up their life they create the narrative that their partner is the absolute worst. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/04/25 07:21 PM |
| 1 | Sleep and the nightmaresIt took a month or 2 before I was sleeping more than 3-4 hours. Therapy helped Also recreational abused Nyquil and melatonin. But even now almost 2 years later there is the occasional night where I'm up thinking. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/04/25 03:57 PM |
| 8 | Divorce coaching for menGo shill on TikTok. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/04/25 03:52 PM |
| 3 | Sad lonely and lostYup it sucks. And even when it's "over" youll still be mad at frustrated. Therapy helps to realize there is nothing you can do. Just gotta keep trucking man. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/04/25 07:17 PM |
| 1 | I need some input from divorced dads.Dude 15 to even 30 minutes is not too far away. It's still close enough to go to every event. My dad moved 1hr away and he still would show up to most events. Just depends on how nice your boss it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/04/25 09:41 PM |
| 1 | Opinions on counselingFind a counselor YOU relate with. It definitely helped me over the initial sadness. But also walk in with a "this is where I struggle" so it is easier to get strategies or perspective that helps you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/04/25 07:50 PM |
| 4 | Are there any tangible steps being taken to change divorce laws?Well step one is stop the redpill shit. Their whole game is to get you made and then feed you a cathartic "fuck women" answer. That's not helping your stress or anxiety. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/04/25 07:47 PM |
| 3 | Having trouble with taking wife's spousal supportTake the money. You'll never have enough anktbwr opportunity to get it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/04/25 01:35 PM |
| 7 | Tell her you are brokeYuuup. Making 80K in a VLCOL area and I'm lucky to have 200$ every month. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/04/25 07:18 PM |
| 6 | Why are women always so quick to advocate divorce?It absolves you of any accountability if he is abusive. Every woman in your life will coddle and say "there there" | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/04/25 07:16 PM |
| 1 | Rock and a hard placeThe only thing the court cares about is hospital visits or calling the cops when it comes to abuse. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/04/25 04:21 PM |
| 2 | New partner not liking my kidThe kid is 2. Literally all they do is yell and throw things and poop. What is she expecting? Even the best kids are a handful at 2. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/04/25 04:13 PM |
| 1 | Relocation QuestionsWell get a credit card or find a cheap one. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/04/25 04:10 PM |
| 3 | Splitting assetsTake everything you listed and give her half. Ta-da assets split. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/04/25 04:01 PM |
| 10 | Can wife move to another state to get a "better deal" in divorce?No. The UCCJA says that jurisdiction of the child custody case is determined by where the child primarily lived 60 days before filing. So if she leaves file immediately to keep it in your district. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/04/25 03:58 PM |
| 6 | Now wife works out and loses weightCrazy how they make all the life changes that would have helped the relationship after it's over. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/04/25 03:56 PM |
| 1 | 50/50 week on week offI am currently doing that. Granted my kid is 3 so it's a bit different with your kids being older. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/03/25 09:56 PM |
| 1 | DiscoveryWith my lawyer I got them all the documents for discovery. They asked if there was anything they needed to know about. I said "nope we are just two normal people". I'm pretty sure they haven't looked at them and saved me a bunch of money in review. It really depends on if you expect to find anything. If it's uncontested/amicable I wouldn't waste the time or money. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/03/25 09:16 PM |
| 3 | Mediation QuestionsAll the money stuff is in discovery your lawyers will do. Mediation is you both sit down. Say what you want. And work towards the middle. If she is unreasonable about everything then it'll be a waste of 2hours and go to court. Remember that the mediators goal is to get a deal done. So if you come in with the more solid (legal) argument they will put pressure on your wife to agree/adjust. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/03/25 08:48 PM |
| 2 | Ex showed up with her new boyfriend to drop off our sonOr, go rent a lambo for the next kid pickup. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/03/25 08:41 PM |
| 5 | Wedding photosNaw man. It's still a major part of your life. Keep the photos. Note: assuming you're mentally stable and not crying over the photos every night while drunk. That would be bad. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/03/25 11:35 AM |
| 3 | Oh gentlemen, how I hate my lifeKid was 18 months. I was doing most of the housework. Working. Coming home at lunch to help how I could. Did many a diaper change and most bath times. She worked part time online and slept in until 9am and did get her PPD worked on. But suddenly when I'm tired and frazzled and frustrated and voice my concerns I'm a horrible abusive monster. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/03/25 06:10 PM |
| 3 | How to respond to a high-conflict stbxwIs it a text message? Don't respond. If it has to do with the kids send a thumbs up. If it's in person, record it and walk away when it no longer involves the kids. If it's at work, call security. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 08:38 PM |
| 3 | remarried with kids. I struggle balancing my life.Why did you get married to a situation that wouldn't work out at the base level of "where to live"? | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 08:36 PM |
| 1 | Child Custody Mediation in LA County – What to Expect?Yep. 2 rounds of mediation. Both times nothing happened cuz she refused to acknowledge i should have some custody. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/03/25 06:03 PM |
| 3 | They Did You A FavorYeah. She never bothered to get her PPD adressed and then decided I was the reason our life was hard. Because I had to carry the weight of the entire house and would get upset and ask for help. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/03/25 05:57 PM |
| 3 | Men who lost everything after divorce, how have you rebuilt your life from rock bottom ?Redecorating and clearing their crap out is a fantastic feeling. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/03/25 05:49 PM |
| 2 | This morning I filled the dishwasher and nobody told me that I had done it wrong.One of our last fights was i asked her to think of 1 or 2 meals that week cuz I'd been doing it for the last year. 2hrs later I was just pissed and went shopping anyways. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/03/25 01:35 AM |
| 28 | This morning I filled the dishwasher and nobody told me that I had done it wrong.Haven't had to listen to a Youtuber talk about makeup or manifesting. I'm very happy. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/03/25 12:23 PM |
| 2 | Mediation TodayArgue for what the law entitles you to. If it's a waste of 2hrs then say "cool, see you in court" and get a date. Also she probably won't agree to anything reasonable. Go in expecting to NOT reach a resolution if she is asking for the moon. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/02/25 09:48 PM |
| 2 | Social Media - Her friends and familyJust delete them | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/02/25 09:46 PM |
| 1 | I thought we were gonna be "friends"You're "friends/coparents" when she wants something. You're an abusive manipulator when you want something. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/02/25 02:55 PM |
| 3 | Court date coming upThat's exactly what happened with me. If nothing happened then just tell the truth. It's her job to prove you're abusive. If there are no hospital visits or police calls, then the court doesn't care. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/02/25 02:47 PM |
| 2 | What should child support cover?A week ago my ex talked about going to the gym. Yesterday it was "i can't afford to take him to the doctor". | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/02/25 03:39 PM |
| 1 | Is she entitled to back child support?Depends on the state. In missouri CS is started to the date she filed for it, not the date separated. The difference is only 2 months for me but she constantly brings up how i "wouldn't help her" blah blah blah. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/02/25 03:22 AM |
| 3 | For those of you who had to go through “war” in your divorce I want to hear your story and how you made it out.Shut up. Be cordial. Don't act out. Let her look fucking insane when you go to court. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/02/25 03:21 AM |
| 3 | How did social circles and communities change after divorce?Oh your wife will 100% turn your friends against you. Just go make new ones. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/01/25 02:57 AM |
| 1 | Will she submit discovery?Yeah dude that doesn't matter at all. The only thing the court cares about are hospital visits and caling the cops. Otherwise you're just wasting your time and paying your lawyer money. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/01/25 02:53 AM |
| 7 | DiscoveryTalk to your lawyer. My lawyers advice was you can still live your life. If you spend 1k to go see friends you frequently see, it's whatever. If you spend 5k to go to Vegas when you've never been, might be frowned upon. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/01/25 08:06 PM |
| 1 | How do you guys get along with your ex’s boyfriend/husband? Especially if you have kids, how has that been?It is what it is. I hope my ex picks a good guy and that's all you can do. If he joins your ex/kids life then it's now all 3 of yalls responsibility to raise the kid. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/01/25 06:36 PM |
| 1 | How do you guys get along with your ex’s boyfriend/husband? Especially if you have kids, how has that been?When i found out she had a Bf initially I was very frustrated. Mostly because she was still denying me a fair amount of time with my son and now having a new man in his life. Now, and hopefully going forward we can be more honest and just act like adults. I was very thankful my divorced parents all got along well and want to emulate that for my son. We will see. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/01/25 06:29 PM |
| 10 | What hobbies or projects have you taken up as a single dad?There is a great Onion article "divorced man burning through hobbies at unsustainable rate". Gives me a chuckle. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/01/25 02:23 AM |
| 2 | What hobbies or projects have you taken up as a single dad?After years of my brother talking about it I got into 40K this year. It's literally plastic crack. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/01/25 02:23 AM |
| 5 | Take STBX off health insurance?Don't change anything until it's final. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/11/24 03:53 AM |
| 5 | How Much To Pay ?I talked to 3 before deciding. She charges 300$ an hour in a LCOL area. If you talk to multiples you get a feel for the case/pricing. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/11/24 03:05 AM |
| 1 | Wife wants 5 nights a week and me out of the house. I want 50/50…..Get a lawyer. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/11/24 12:34 PM |
| 3 | Day 2, my lawyer emailed me a bunch of forms to fill out, financials and all of that stuff. My wife is hiding our marriage certificate and tax returns. Anyone else have this happen?For taxes you can retrieve them from an IRS website. I forget the exact link but they will send them to you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/11/24 12:31 PM |
| 4 | How to move on from feeling taken advantage of?Being able to come home and just do what I want to is fantastic | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/11/24 12:29 PM |
| 2 | Alimony and child supportYo can you get my ex wife to work full time? | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/11/24 04:33 AM |
| 1 | Anybody else try to protect their ex-wife’s reputation by not telling your side of the story? I feel like I can’t just throw her under the bus.Lol fuck that. Defend yourself. Most people are going to choose her side anyways | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/11/24 08:31 PM |
| 2 | 4 years post divorce now Ex wants to change financial aspects of a divorce decree that SHE WROTE.Oh well it's obvious, everything is gaslighting or manipulation according to them. Even when I send her her own texts as evidence, I'm gaslighting. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/11/24 07:24 PM |
| 2 | How to Live an Exciting LifeTheres an onion article "divorced man burning through hobbies at unsustainable rate". Look at it for ideas. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/11/24 04:27 PM |
| 0 | Future stepdadAll you can do is hope they pick a good partner. And hope the step-dad is different enough from you to give your kid a broader perspective on life and skills. I grew up with divorced parents. My dad was outdoors, caving, hiking, history, and computers. My stepdad was shooting, construction, and sports. Both taught valuable life lessons. Just gotta hope the same for your kid and ex. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/11/24 04:26 PM |
| 1 | How did reality hit you x?I keep trying to get through to her that her lawyer is milking her to prevent this exact thing. But maybe that's just the controlling asshole in me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/10/24 12:56 AM |
| 1 | What does my ex-wife expect will happen in family court?She expects everyone will agree with her and see you for the horrible monster you really are! Or you're just an average guy and the court will go with the standard division of things. My ex forced me to take her to court after the mediator and GAL both said we should be doing 50/50. Now she's 5k more owed to her Lawyer. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/10/24 12:01 AM |
| 5 | Dealing with novel length messagesSend a thumbs up. Also shen you go to court it's fun when your lawyer has 300 pages of your texts to use her words against her. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/10/24 11:56 PM |
| 1 | Need help with financial decisions after wife is leaving me.Jesus christ 20% interest. There are other options besides a loan shark. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/10/24 05:48 PM |
| 1 | She just can't seem to grow up.That was my ex. Every 3 months I'd get upset and ask for help. It'd get better then go away. After 2 years of this she divorces. I'm just "so full of resentment and anger". Yeah cuz I'm taking care of an adult after communicating my problem for years. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/10/24 07:38 PM |
| 1 | Can she file for child support just like that?Yep they can just file whatever they want and don't have to prove anything. Unless all your agreements are in a court order they don't mean jack. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/09/24 01:45 PM |
| 2 | Ex sent me this tonightThat's half of my messages to the ex | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/09/24 12:44 PM |
| 1 | Ex trying to back out…Lol exactly. They changed their subscription plan from "husband" to "Ex husband". | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/09/24 12:43 PM |
| 2 | Exwife's most recent disaster. The fix? Get money out of ex-husband!My last argument with ex I kept trying to drill in "you chose to get divorced". Like goddamn, you wanna be two separate households but still want me to pay for everything. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/09/24 08:20 PM |
| 1 | Anyone’s ex-wives kidnap their kids and run out of state?Lol it's what my wife is doing. Demand I move to bunfuck nowhere to have 50/50. But also wants alimony that's only possible by my big city job. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/09/24 08:25 PM |
| 1 | Anyone’s ex-wives kidnap their kids and run out of state?If you filed immediately you should fall under uccjea where the kid is technically still in your area for legal reasons. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/09/24 08:24 PM |
| 1 | STBX keeps complaining about inconvenience as a reason to get physical custodyIt doesnt matter what you do. She'll still be shitty and blame all her problems on you. My stbx left a year ago and still can't piece together that if she can't afford to live she needs to get a better job. Why don't you get your son earlier in the nights so he gets more time with you? That's the more concerning part. Everything she says is just noise to block out. But that time with your son is what's important. Right now she can paint the picture you're just a hotel for the kid. And as far as … | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/09/24 08:18 PM |
| 4 | I think my ex is recording our conversationsShe 100% is recording them. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/09/24 01:44 AM |
| 2 | Looking for post divorce adviceDo group solo travel. You're with a group of other single people on a trip. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/09/24 01:42 AM |
| 2 | What's it going to take to fix things?It doesn't matter. I've sent her own messages to her and just get told I'm gaslighting. With her own words. He'll half of my custody trial was "she said X on this day". | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/09/24 11:49 AM |
| 6 | Did anyone end up being Happy their Wife Divorced them?Do some therapy for your own sake. It's good to hear your not crazy. I hit the "wow this is better" point after about 9 months. Also the best way to get over someone is to get under someone. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/09/24 07:18 PM |
| 3 | “The spark is gone” is a poor reason to leave a marriage."Spark upkeep". A couple months into marriage counseling I asked her to plan a date. You would thought I screamed obscenities at her by the way she responded. The mere idea that she should put in effort and I should be on the receiving end of being treated nice. Woowwww | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/09/24 11:29 AM |
| 5 | Those who divorced with a baby, what is life going to look like?Wife left when son was 18 months. First she takes the kid away for a year until I finally got to court. But since then it's fantastic getting to run around with my son. So much love and laughing just hanging out. We are "coparenting" yet because she alternates between wanting to fight and playing the victim. So I'm just doing my own thing to raise him during my time. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/24 07:08 PM |
| 1 | Mediation Challenges - Splitting The BillI make 80k, wife makes 30k. She burned through the 10k from when she left and has been screaming poverty for months. But also wants to fight tooth and nail over everything and insists I'll pay her alimony and lawyer fees. Demand everything be fair or she will stick you with the bills for everything. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/24 01:36 AM |
| 1 | Unrealistic thoughts.Omg the nail clipping. Every time I get my son back he has long dirty nails. It's not that hard. Get him watching TV and theni just ask "can I have your hand" and he does fine. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/09/24 01:38 PM |
| 2 | DatingGot on the dating apps 2 months after leaving. Started dating 4 months after. Got into a relationship 8 months after. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/09/24 12:52 PM |
| 4 | Is it just me. Am I the reason the word gaslighting was invented?Sending her screenshot of her own texts. Gaslighting. Telling her what the judge said. Gaslighting. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/09/24 12:39 PM |
| 7 | STBX will not give upI'm just over a year into it. In Sep I said all I wanted was 50/50, everything else is just math problem. She said "hell no". She claimed abuse. We went through GaL process. For even more delay she demanded mediation which I told her would go nowhere. GaL recommended 50/50 in April and she refused to give me the time. Mediation didn't solve anything. Finally went to court a couple weeks ago. Got my 50/50 because it's the law. Now we go back in January because she's demanding alimony she doesn't … | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/08/24 06:55 PM |
| 2 | LLC started after separation date - community property?Get a lawyer. I imagine you're going to have to argue. It also probably comes down to your level of separation and the timeline. If you separated and started a company the next day it looks weird. If you hadn't talked to eachother in 5 years when you started then you can probably argue it's not communal | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/08/24 06:30 PM |
| 1 | Is it common for women to counterfile petitionsWoo way to go! You're magically horrible and abusive and that is what she will tell everyone. As the other comment said, record everything. You can guarantee she is. As far as the "evidence" the GaL only cared about doctor visits, calls to the cops, calls to CPS. Like actual crimes. Her saying I raised my voice didn't mean anything in court. Otherwise hang on and keep your cool for a year. It'll eventually get her back when you get to court. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/08/24 04:11 PM |
| 3 | I have a court appointment this week. Should I go hard or easy on my ex for withholding timesharing time?I went to court 2 weeks ago for 50/50. The lawyer did all the talking. Just present all relevant information to your lawyer and let them sort it out. (Assuming you got a good one). Remember they do this day in and day out. And make sure you're clean and have answers for all her complaints/reasons. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/08/24 02:19 AM |
| 2 | What do you think people usually get wrong about you and your divorce?My stbx wants to live the exact same life we had. She wants to stay at home with our kid and I pay for everything. Just doesn't want me hanging around. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/08/24 02:15 AM |
| 16 | What do you think people usually get wrong about you and your divorce?Dont worry, your wife will tell them you did! | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/08/24 02:11 AM |
| 1 | What are some if the red flags in the beginning of the relationship that you missed?Mmmhmmm if all her family is single that's how she'll end up. Get that CS | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/08/24 04:20 PM |
| 2 | What are some if the red flags in the beginning of the relationship that you missed?If she says "I'm not like my family"... yeah that's a lie. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/08/24 04:19 PM |
| 1 | Any father who went through custody trial?I literally went to court on Monday to go from weekends to 50/50. 1st is what state you're in and how do they determine custody. If 50/50 is the default then you can push for that and barring a crazy circumstance you should get it. Make sure she looks crazy. Keep demanding a fair amount of time with your child. When she denies it it'll look bad on her. As far as the actual trial, it was about 2.5 hours. We both got questioned and raked over the coals by our attorneys. Make sure you have solid ex… | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/08/24 04:15 PM |
| 3 | If you could say one last thing to your X/STBX and she couldn't respond... What would it be?Oh yeah the making of their own reality. It's crazy how I can be abusive, gaslighting, manipulative, and a horrible husband. A month after being "great". | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/07/24 07:38 PM |
| 1 | STBXW hits the nuclear button...I hope it works the same way for me wirh her actions not matching her words. She says I'm abusive and is afraid of me. But I get the kid 6+ days a month... | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/07/24 07:24 PM |
| 1 | Negotiating temp custody schedule with narcissistMy stbxw also just says "no" because she doesn't want the kid in daycare. Even after the GAL and mediator told her to share. So now we get to go to court. It friggin sucks having limited time with your kid. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/07/24 07:17 PM |
| 1 | Living in the house you used to share with your Ex WifeDecluttering really helped. Got to get rid of all the stupid stuff she bought. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/07/24 05:56 PM |
| 4 | Letting your kids goI've been fighting for more time with my son for a year. We were on the call to setup child support and I just wanted the adjustment for the time I was getting. I agrees to all the back support and everything. Still got called a deadbeat during the call. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/07/24 05:41 PM |
| 8 | Narcissism seems to be the new buzzword today. Did or are you dealing with that in your present or past divorce?But surprisingly they never brought up these issues pre separation. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/07/24 04:51 PM |
| 6 | Narcissism seems to be the new buzzword today. Did or are you dealing with that in your present or past divorce?Let's see, so far I'm a narcissist, controlling, gaslighting, manipulative, took her away from her family, and abusive. But she's infallible obviously. All of this is sarcasm btw. She finds whatever on tiktok she can scream about. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/07/24 04:50 PM |
| 3 | How do you stay in contact/how often do you communicate with your kids on days they are with your ex?Not your exact situation because I'm fighting over a toddler. But i get to face time my kid most every night. I've got a coworker with preteen kids and they get to call their dad every night. Given that your kids are at the age they have their own phones you can probably talk to them whenever you want. Within reason. Like don't demand they call you at 10pm on a school night. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/07/24 03:08 AM |
| 1 | Still lostGo watch hoe math on YouTube. Women stopped fighting/committing because in 10 minutes the can download tinder and find another option. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/24 10:02 AM |
| 2 | How to deal with. . . .I admit that I didn't like that my stbxw was having a new man around my son. Especially because I am still fighting for a fair amount of parenting time and she didn't even tell me it was happening. But until proven otherwise you just have to assume your ex has half a brain and will hopefully pick her next partner to be someone as good as you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/24 10:01 AM |
| 3 | How to verify you are her Plan B/C/D/...ZI will be so happy when I finally get assigned the marital residence. I constantly worry I'll come home from work and she will have moved her stuff back in. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/24 09:58 AM |
| 13 | Lying ex wifeYup. My ex started by just lying to family and friends that I'm abusive. Then 4 months into the process told the courts I'm abusive to her and our child. Riddle me this, if I'm abusive, why do you keep giving me the child on weekends? | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/06/24 09:56 AM |
| 1 | Four and a half hours of mediation to get nowhere.MO "requires" 2 hours of mediation. My ex doesn't make any logical sense and even the Mediator started to get pissed off at her. Like he would call out her bullshit reasoning. But she remained insane sonow we are going to trial. Like we originally had scheduled in January. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/06/24 12:11 PM |
| 2 | How to deal with my stbx during our divorce?Me and stbx were high conflict for a couple months because she just left and dealing with the breakup. Eventually she will say something some baffling stupid you realize there is no point in talking to her. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/24 02:49 PM |
| 3 | No one prepares you for the sheer volume of discovery in a high conflict divorce.Same. I knocked my discover out in 2 weeks. Her lawyer came back with a ton of motions about "he didn't provide X document" which I had, and other nitpicking things. Meanwhile they took 4 months and my lawyer didn't even ask them to speed it. I bet she spent over 3k on the discovery of two very normal people. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/24 02:47 PM |
| 2 | Is there really an out19 months is when my wife left. You both need to recognize that you're going through a huge transition. Going from a potato that can put down while you do other stuff, to a toddler that needs constant attention is super stressful. Being the sole provider builds a bunch of resentment. Have her checked for PPD if she truly hates what you do with your time. Give it six months to adjust to your new life. I'd go to your own personal therapist. Because the flip side of not seeing your little kid grow … | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/24 02:43 PM |
| 3 | Quitting my job like women leave their husbandsCounterpoint. When the man does 90% of the chores and the wife watches youtube all day it builds resentment. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/05/24 02:41 PM |
| 6 | Home/Auto Insurance during divorceDon't touch it. There's a lot of spite in the comments but that's not the logical thing to do. If you stopped her insurance (especially without informing her) then she gets into a wreck that now costs 1000s, has to get a new car, maybe some medical bills, has to go to court for driving without insurance. But guess what, you two are still a legal pair and you're responsible for half that shit. If she has to get a new car without an insurance payout then half that debt is yours. Also there is the … | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/05/24 02:14 PM |
| 1 | SOON to be ex wife?Lol my ex had her lawyer file to demand me to get my own phone plan. Like, you could have just told me... | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/05/24 07:39 PM |
| 3 | How Bad Is The RealizationDon't get Gone Girl'd | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/05/24 12:20 PM |
| 1 | I can’t even go fishingNo advice but... woo! Someone else who's ex makes them feel like they have to do everything perfectly. High five! Mine got pissed I didn't tell her BEFORE I went to urgent care and instead told her afterwards. Even the mediator was like "he took care of your kid and told you, what more do you want?" | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/05/24 06:31 PM |
| 9 | Does anyone else get told this after the divorce starts?Do what you want to do that'll make you happy. Everyone gives advice because they don't have to deal with the consequences. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/05/24 12:57 PM |
| 2 | There's nothing I can do.You will. I thought I wouldn't either but when she drops "I have a boyfriend" 2 months into the process your gut will sink. Basically it reminds you that this person you loved could care less about moving on from you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/05/24 11:42 AM |
| 1 | Mediation1k? Like a month for alimony, or 1K total? If it's 1k total sign the check and get out of there. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/05/24 11:09 AM |
| 8 | What is the worst that can happen?Worst is she takes every dime and you never see the kids. Best is 50/50 custody and an equitable split of property and no alimony. How much you're willing to fight determines where on that range you end up. You can't roll over and give her everything because imagine where you want to be in 10 years. You are also fighting for your future. But remember your kids need their father. You're all depressed and sad now, but it does get better. Give it a couple months. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/05/24 01:42 PM |
| 2 | Money and DivorceJust don't. In discovery they'll get all your bank statements. If they see a transaction for 1000s they'll ask questions. Unless this money is hidden in cash there is already a trail. For example, my wife's lawyer asked to see my WeBull account because I had a transaction to my bank from 2 years ago. I hadn't used the account in 2 years and it had 16 cents in it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/05/24 02:09 PM |
| 2 | Why bother with mediation / settlement if a judge will just assign 50/50?Oh yeah 100%. She has no logic in anything she's doing. Even the mediator started to get pissed at her. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/05/24 07:39 PM |
| 2 | STBEx was choosing to be miserableEvery single change my ex "tried" to do for the last year we were together were all accomplished after 3 months with new guy. Lost weight. Being more active. Getting outside. Being an active contributor to the team. They are an entirely new person post separation. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/05/24 04:24 PM |
| 4 | Why bother with mediation / settlement if a judge will just assign 50/50?In my state Mediation is mandated. I told them it's a waste of time because my ex won't agree to 50/50. Spent 2 hours in mediation trying to convince her or figure out ways to get more time with our son. She still didn't agree. Now we get to go to trial for 50/50. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/05/24 04:20 PM |
| 3 | I almost feel like during the separation, she completely managed to deconstruct our history and relationships to accommodate her decision to separate.Our most recent fight I brought up I communicated my frustrations for months before counseling and she never brought up any problems. Guess I need to be a mind reader. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/05/24 03:32 PM |
| 3 | I almost feel like during the separation, she completely managed to deconstruct our history and relationships to accommodate her decision to separate.I found out it's gaslighting to send her back her own txt messages. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/05/24 03:29 PM |
| 5 | I almost feel like during the separation, she completely managed to deconstruct our history and relationships to accommodate her decision to separate.It's just how they operate. Even in marriage counseling these concerns weren't brought up but during the separation you would think I was a horrible monster from her stories. My favorite was she said that saying "I love you" in reciprocity doesn't count. Wrap your head around that. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/05/24 03:28 PM |
| 6 | Why do they get so angry and destructive when most of the time they’re the ones leaving?We finally got to the point where she could be a stay at home mom. The dream she had wanted for years. Instead she has a mental breakdown and runs away with our kid. Now she complains about being poor and I hardly get to see my son. Their brains are fucking broken. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/05/24 02:12 PM |
| 3 | Why do they get so angry and destructive when most of the time they’re the ones leaving?I got called a deadbeat dad. I'm fighting for 50/50 custody and agreed to the child support amount. But I guess that makes me a deadbeat. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/05/24 02:00 PM |
| 1 | Why do they get so angry and destructive when most of the time they’re the ones leaving?I got told I was "controlling" because I "always needed to know where she was". Asking what errands she is running is small talk. Not being controlling. But whatever. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/05/24 01:59 PM |
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