| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 10 | Male Attraction is Treated as Normal and Women's Attraction is Seen as Shallow or BadWe get shamed whenever we express a preference. Just speaking for my own experience, saying I'm not attracted to fat women was treated as if I was the devil. Meanwhile, women literally telling me to kill myself for having an illness affected appearance was just fine. Oh, and I was "entitled" for hoping to be treated with basic decency. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/07/26 11:20 PM |
| 2 | Most people don’t want to be around someone with a victim complex,And you still don't get it. Still refuse to acknowledge the despicable way many women treat men that they consider unattractive. Not just a one-off, or making some mean comments online (as one woman's post here recently whinged about), but a constant and widespread pattern of viewing and treating them negatively in person for things they can't change. The lack of empathy or human decency is actually quite sickening in some cases such as my experiences with being abused for my illness. Things lik… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/06/26 12:48 AM |
| 3 | Most people don’t want to be around someone with a victim complex,"A woman isn’t discriminating against someone because she swipes left or says no" Of course not. But she is when she refuses to even speak to that person, abuses his appearance, openly expresses her disgust, hatred, or in any way treats him less favourably because of his immutable characteristics (the literal definition of discrimination). All of which women do en masse to less physically attractive men. Hell, I've been spat on, told to kill myself, and generally treated as subhuman scum not des… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/06/26 10:48 PM |
| – | I've heard people say that men's lack of success on dating apps doesn't occur in real life. I don't believe thatExactly, I mean I started online dating as a "last resort" because of the hatefulness and mistreatment I experienced in real life. It's a lot easier to handle abuse on a screen than being told to your face that you're too ugly to date and that you should just kill yourself. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/01/26 08:25 AM |
| 2 | CMV: Looks matter more for women, social skills matter more for men.It's baffling how anyone can disagree. Men will give a chance to the majority of women, who meet some very easy to pass standards. We find such a large proportion of women to be physically attractive that personality / compatibility becomes the filter. Contrast this with women who will immediately disregard the overwhelming majority of men on sight, and it's blatantly obvious that they're only judging on looks as his personality literally cannot be known to her. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/12/25 06:52 AM |
| 0 | Why do women dislike the bottom 50% of men?It's rare, but it definitely happens, both online and in real life. The majority I'd say were indifferent, mostly falling in a large group that would either treat me ok (with varying levels of subtelty / tact in making it clear I was not in any way a dating option), or just refuse to even speak to me / actively ignore my presence. It was a much smaller group who would go out of their way to be cruel and hateful - screaming insults, mockery of my illness and the visible symptoms, calling me old, … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/11/25 07:50 AM |
| 80 | Sexlessness is associated with higher IQ, increased educational attainment, lower BMI and lower ADHD ratesHow do you do, fellow geniuses? | /r/BlackPillScience | 17/09/25 07:59 AM |
| 5 | How do you all talk about this online discourse in real life?Same, lovable "idiot" while really being a secretly smart professional is my entire vibe. It's laughable when people claim "well you say it here" (online, anonymously) so you must obviously go around yelling it at the top of your lungs in real life. The only people I've ever touched this topic with in real life are therapists, and my closest friends. The women in that friends group were utterly shocked and appalled to hear the shit that had been said / done to me for the "crime" of looking diffe… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/08/25 08:00 AM |
| 8 | The majority of people aren't as bitter and awful as people here like to make them out to beYep, a big one is that most people are completely oblivious and lacking any form of empathy for those who have had such vastly different experiences that they immediately jump to blaming the one suffering / complaining. Sometimes it seems that many are pathologically incapable of even the simplest thought about what it must be like and how a constant stream of negative experiences throughout your formative years affects your mental health. I mean, I could guarantee you put a bunch of people thro… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/07/25 10:34 PM |
| 11 | Why do men interpret women’s disinterest as hostility?Nearly at work, so short version, the last one was what drove me to give up. First meeting with one woman off an app, about 4 years ago. She was a lawyer who had also done medical research - so not an idiot etc. Out for a drink, was going pleasantly enough, no "wow" but I don't generally have that instant feeling anyway. She knew about my illness (had come up in chat) and we'd talked a little. At the end, I asked about a second "date". The response was incredibly cruel. She proceeded to firstly … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/06/25 12:18 AM |
| 11 | Why do men interpret women’s disinterest as hostility?Sometimes, probably, but bear in mind this was predominantly in social settings e.g. at uni, bars, events, and I'm not one to press. It's also in the context of literally immediately seeing a different reaction to a "normal" looking guy. That is, it's abundantly clear the hostility and cruelty was aimed at treating some negatively but not others. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/25 11:50 PM |
| 13 | Why do men interpret women’s disinterest as hostility?Randoms, acquaintances. I won't repeat my other replies, but yes, this happens in real life occasionally but relatively consistently to men who are considered less physically attractive or different looking. Much more common and depressing is the refusal to even speak to you, often coupled with looks of disgust and body language etc. that makes it very clear your presence in that location (like university, the bar) is not welcome. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/25 11:29 PM |
| 21 | Why do men interpret women’s disinterest as hostility?Yes. And that is paraphrased, because as you say no-one says that in precisely those terms, but absolutely women have said things like "you don't get to talk" (with a visible look and tone of disgust), "no-one could ever love you because of your illness", or spat at me and said "fuck off" "get out of here" (here being a bar) immediately on first eye contact. Exact words etc. are fading as most of this was more than 10 years ago when I was in my 20's. Point is though, that many women will certain… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/25 11:23 PM |
| 16 | Why do men interpret women’s disinterest as hostility?Women. Repeatedly. This can't possibly be news to you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/25 10:49 PM |
| 27 | Why do men interpret women’s disinterest as hostility?Because, for different looking / "ugly" men it frequently IS accompanied with cruelty, open hatred, and treating the man as less than human. Saying you don't want to date someone is fine. Telling that person they don't deserve basic decency is not. Calling the person unlovable and saying they should kill themselves is not. Abusing them for looking different / "ugly" is not. Refusing to even speak to them or to treat them as a human being is not. Now, guess how many times the first happens compar… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/25 09:53 PM |
| 11 | Men, what's the worst thing that happened to you after asking a woman out?I doubt there's any guilt, but the extreme examples were very rare. 99% of the time it was the being ignored completely or polite but very clear not interested in that way. It is more the constant never even being given a chance / getting dismissed on sight that gets you down. Factoring in the "why" just makes you angry. I eventually gave up any hope of dating but have always had good friends. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/06/25 03:31 AM |
| 33 | Men, what's the worst thing that happened to you after asking a woman out?Most of the worst ones for me happened before showing any interest (or even speaking, in many cases) - e.g. the disgusted looks, screamed insults, getting told to fuck off and die, spat on etc. Par for the course for a guy who looks different to the norm. In terms of responses to showing interest / asking, most were polite - if they had shown the basic decency to treat me as human / talk to me, they were kind enough to be tactful. Sticking to real life, the ones I remember are being told several… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/06/25 10:30 PM |
| 1 | Would You Date A Woman With The Following Qualities?Would You Date A Woman With The Following Qualities? Would you date a woman who is a different race from your own? Yes Would you date a woman who is a different religion from your own? Yes, but see 4. Would you date a woman who smokes? No, I'm on immunosuppresants following a transplant Would you date a woman who goes to church every Sunday? Maybe, if they weren't preachy or obsessive about it Would you date a woman who is asexual? Yes Would you date a woman who lives 1000 miles away from you? I… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/06/25 10:18 PM |
| 15 | Dating apps are not a good indicator of real life datingThis happens in real life too. Women absolutely choose based on attraction in real life as well. So much so that a shockingly high percentage literally refuse to even think of speaking to a man who is seen as less physically attractive or looks different to the norm. Others openly abuse and mistreat the "ugly" guy. Appearance then practically becomes the only factor in romance because they aren't waiting around to learn about the man's personality etc., or to interact with him over time, they're… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/04/25 12:34 AM |
| 4 | My take on how society has failed men and has contributed to extreme red pill ideology.One caveat, I'm talking about when I was in my teens and twenties here, now I'm just invisible and have stopped trying / hoping. I've always felt there are levels, and active mistreatment was relatively rare. From the backdrop of a majority (around 2/3rds) just not even recognising me as human and intentionally refusing to speak to me (and I've got a few doozies about some of those!), I'd include as mistreatment the ones who would aggressively do so - things like physically blocking me from grou… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/01/25 03:00 AM |
| 1 | My take on how society has failed men and has contributed to extreme red pill ideology.Yep, the outcome is what's important. I've gone to a therapist for over a decade (I get it for free due to having a chronic illness). And yeah, it's been some help. It's nice to have somewhere non-judgemental to talk about all the shit I go through for the "crime" of looking different. But all the talking in the world, and all the positive mindset / cognitive techniques / masking the pain mean nothing if they don't lead to a material change in my life. And they haven't. Because the problem isn't… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/01/25 09:35 PM |
| 2 | why won't women engage with men?I have experienced it very frequently - at least 50% of similarly aged women i.e. my peers and potential partners. That said, I do live in a different reality! The reality of someone who has always looked very different to "normal" due to an illness. I wouldn't expect my experiences to be common, but it's infuriating all the same when people deny it happens or look to blame me or my personality etc. when it's blatantly obvious that this judgement and refusal to engage or act with basic decency h… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/01/25 02:52 AM |
| 2 | why won't women engage with men?The personality is B.S. for women because all men care about is how a woman looks This is wrong, but not completely. Yes, men care about looks. More importantly, we admit that (as opposed to women's frequent lies). BUT, our threshold for looks is much lower than women's unrealistic and frequently impossible "standards" for many men (being based on immutable characteristics). That said, I know it must suck for the women who do fall below that threshold. In the same way it sucks for the much large… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/01/25 02:43 AM |
| 3 | At what age does a man living with his parents becomes a red flag, ick or deal breaker?Exactly. Most people who instantly dismiss someone for living at home just reveal their close-mindedness and lack of empathy. I'm a perfect case in point. I stayed living at home in my 20's because I was seriously sick and on dialysis. Messed up my ability to work full-time and therefore my career (no-one hires a grad who needs to spend 20 hours a week on treatment). By 30, I'd got a transplant and was looking at places to move out. But guess what? Now mum was sick and with the family broke afte… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/12/24 09:28 PM |
| 3 | Why does the perception that "most men are physically unattractive or below average" exist among women?What is your problem? Have you seriously never seen the absolutely despicable way many women treat men who look different to the norm? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/12/24 12:31 AM |
| 3 | Why does the perception that "most men are physically unattractive or below average" exist among women?Who knows? I don't make the "rules", I can just share my experience of vicious hatred for the "crime" of looking different. But, by not having immutable characteristics that are treated as instantly disqualifying, you're capable of being in that top 25%. Funnily enough, I match all of your characteristics mentioned there (white, tall, good with money / career, and I wouldn't say I'm disfigured, women apparently disagree with that last one) except for not being American and not overweight. Yet, I… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/12/24 09:22 PM |
| 13 | Why does the perception that "most men are physically unattractive or below average" exist among women?You heard wrong. You can do all that and more, but remain in the bottom 5% of dating options simply because of your appearance - specifically immutable characteristics. The result? Frequent abuse and near constantly being immediately dismissed on sight with women refusing to even consider talking to you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/12/24 08:51 PM |
| 2 | Guys here refuse to believe any behavior can be creepy and/or hinder one’s social life.This idea that men should only approach women who make it obvious they want to be approached is detrimental. It is women who push this the most though, in how they act. Being a less physically attractive man, it's also the "safest" way for me to go about things - and I'm not just even talking about a dating context - this applies to basically all social interactions with women. Not engaging without clear signs / eye contact is the only way I avoid excess unprovoked abuse for my appearance (and i… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/11/24 09:10 PM |
| 0 | What’s the one quality in a woman that instantly wins you over?Surprised I haven't seen it yet, but similar sense of humour! Finding the same little stupid things hilarious. Other than that, as a guy who's been consistently insulted / ignored for having an illness that affects my appearance, it's basic decency and the capability for empathy. Sadly a very rare commodity. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/10/24 10:12 PM |
| 10 | Men: what are some ways that women have treated you "horribly"?A genetic kidney disease. Renal failure by 25. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/09/24 10:13 PM |
| 37 | Men: what are some ways that women have treated you "horribly"?Well let's see... Repeatedly being told to kill myself. Called a lesser person and undeserving of basic decency for having an illness that affected my appearance. Labelled "creepy", "decrepit", "old man" as a teenager. Physically assaulted and spat on for my presence at uni events and bars. Disgusted looks, scowls, and insults daily. Having abuse screamed at me for saying hello. Intentionally being ignored and deliberately refusing to even speak to me, physical exclusion from conversations. Accu… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/09/24 08:23 AM |
| 3 | The "nice guy" trope is a defense mechanism which women deploy to divert attention from the fact that they are rejecting a guy based on a lack of physical attractionHow many people really don't want to be with someone solely for their appearance The overwhelming majority of women. Do most women really constantly reject men by whom they feel understood and accepted as they are, with whom they feel safe, with whom they have compatible personalities, lifestyles, values, world view and wishes for the future, merely for his looks? Yes, but not in your bizarre scenario, but simply because they never even bother to find any of that out. I struggle to believe anyon… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/08/24 09:58 PM |
| 2 | Sexually unsuccessful men are like scientistsThis is so self-evident we should be worrying about the mental capacity of those who refuse to acknowledge it. I'm also a living example of your friends here - balding heavily and sickly looking (not exactly surprising given I do have a pretty fucked illness) since 16 - the judgement / dismissal is so often immediate. Women literally refusing to even consider speaking to you or simply making it abundantly clear you are not an option - typecast as the ugly friend. What shocked and hurt me though … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/07/24 10:04 PM |
| 6 | “Getting off the apps” doesn’t help when the same mindsets are predominantYep. But it seemed the only hope, even if it never worked! I have a pretty fucked genetic kidney disease. So was ridiculously pale, skinny, sickly looking. Plus I went bald from 16 to full horseshoe at 21. Probably connected, no treatment worked etc. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/06/24 09:25 AM |
| 10 | “Getting off the apps” doesn’t help when the same mindsets are predominantAround 20 a week, for 6 years, so at least 6,500. Could count the legitimate replies on my fingers. A couple a year. Bear in mind too that I only started online at 26. Real life was worse. Also, this is what it's like if you're a man who looks different to the norm due to illness. For a good chunk of that time too I was spending 20+ hours a week hooked up to treatment too. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/06/24 09:06 AM |
| 13 | “Getting off the apps” doesn’t help when the same mindsets are predominantIt doesn't really work that way in the end. They still need to decide whether to read your message. How do they decide? Your photo. I spent years on dating sites where you have a full profile, and could send messages etc. In a bout of depression / frustration I collected results for a few months. 98% of women I messaged did not read my message or even open my profile (you got notification whenever that happened). 98% Just ignored me based on a photo alone. And a good chunk of the 2% who did read… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/06/24 08:13 AM |
| 3 | How can a man with insecurities remain unruffled by women's predominant preferences in terms of tastes?You do kind of need to know "where" to look, I don't see it daily but it's there amongst young people still - e.g. uni / grad jobs. I always attribute it to being such an immediately visible outlier. Being sick, pale and extremely skinny didn't help either. The easy example were parties / bars at that age. A crowd of young, healthy people with booze, and the one increasingly shy, middle-aged / tired / sick accountant looking dude sticking out. An easy target. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/24 11:50 PM |
| 2 | How can a man with insecurities remain unruffled by women's predominant preferences in terms of tastes?Yeah, we tend to focus on what we know, but absolutely people can be absolutely vicious to those who are different. That sounds so horrible. Truly sorry you had to go through that. I really appreciate how lucky I was to go to an all guys high school, because at least I was a bit more mature and able to handle it a little. Can't help but think how different things could have ended had I experienced it all earlier. And to have been relatively normal up to that point so at least I had some true fri… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/24 11:41 PM |
| 19 | How can a man with insecurities remain unruffled by women's predominant preferences in terms of tastes?Outside. Seriously, some of you must be wilfully blind to not see "ugly" / different looking men and the relentless hatred we endure. I went bald at 16, somewhat accelerated due to illness. Before I was 20 I'd already experienced: - being screamed at in public - open laughter, mockery, and cruel jokes - getting called a creepy / decrepit old man - repeated unprovoked insults for my appearance - being told by women to kill myself - actual physical assaults such as being spat on for my mere presen… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/24 10:06 PM |
| 5 | Regarding the phrase ‘genetically inferior’…Australian women though are some of the most brutal in the world regarding other genetic or unchangeable physical characteristics. They have zero problems abusing men who look different to the "ideal". To the extent of telling them to kill themselves, and even physically assaulting them. That's been my experience as an Australian man with an illness affected appearance (bald as a teenager, extremely pale, skinny etc.). It's so bad that I was driven to the brink of suicide, and would gleefully ta… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/05/24 08:21 AM |
| 14 | I genuinely don't know what else to doThis is before counting looks, interests, education or personality. This is the hilarious / sad part. The men who do meet all of those criteria are still invisible to the woman. Because to be in that group and still be single likely means below average attractiveness (speaking from personal experience!) | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 21/05/24 11:09 PM |
| 5 | being a bear in the woodsJust wear a bear costume. Problem solved! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/05/24 07:08 AM |
| 1 | Despite progressivity, has the treatment towards Autistic men by women worsened in recent years?That's interesting, maybe I overinflate the issue for the ND side because I don't want to minimise their struggles, being personally from the other group (and treated horrifically for how I looked). That said, my experiences were to a smaller extent similar, e.g. have a few female friends who always tried their best to understand and help, but it was always made clear (in a nice way) that I wasn't seen as a romantic option. A similar story every time I'd meet someone new and be interested - alwa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/04/24 09:03 AM |
| 10 | Despite progressivity, has the treatment towards Autistic men by women worsened in recent years?Yes, but the same principle applies in both circumstances. It's being (looking) different to the norm that leads to shocking treatment. The lack of any form of empathy or even any attenpt at understanding is devastating at times. Not to mention the disturbingly large proportion of women who don't see you as human or worthy of basic respect / decency. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/04/24 07:42 AM |
| 2 | When self-proclaimed “nice guys” say that they are “good guys,” what “good” traits are they talking about?And, the lack from nature (i.e. being less physically attractive) then makes it much harder to develop the social aptitude etc. because you get treated less favourably. It's actually surprising that so few "ugly" men act out etc., as you'd expect people who have been kicked their entire lives to eventually have enough. Many of us though internalise the hatred we receive and withdraw / lock it away to numb ourselves. Funnily enough, those guys blessed by nature are much more likely to lash out fr… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/03/24 09:26 PM |
| 9 | Is it over for inexperienced men who didn't go to college?Yeah, this was me. I hoped things would get better and that as women got older they'd be more understanding about me having an illness affected appearance and I wouldn't immediately be written off on sight. Nope. If anything I experienced more hatred for it as the kinder, caring, decent ones were increasingly off the market. No one gives a shit about the reason why you're inexperienced either. Many seem to have a pathological inability to understand how people react differently to things at diff… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/03/24 03:24 AM |
| 16 | Too many people overthink dating100% doubt. You've been told to k1ll yourself? How about physically assaulted? Told you're a lesser human and undeserving of basic decency because you have an illness / look different to the norm? Screamed at for making eye contact? Do 50% plus of women literally refuse to speak to you or acknowledge your existence? Now couple that with zero positive experiences and you may understand why guys like me give up. It's incredibly easy when you have the knowledge that you have been found attractive b… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/02/24 09:34 PM |
| 6 | The reason men "have such low standards" is because they assume that any woman they get with to change to fit the mold of their ideal life.It would make sense, if the judgements did match the smaller data points. We know that's not the case. Good looking but scruffy or slobbish men still have success that well dressed "uglier" guys can only dream of. The halo effect there is massive. There is probably some truth in the "how you wear it" idea as that points to confidence etc., the thing is though that "confidence" in the dating world should absolutely not be the automatic green flag many women treat it as. In fact, what it represent… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/02/24 06:53 AM |
| 4 | The reason men "have such low standards" is because they assume that any woman they get with to change to fit the mold of their ideal life.Part of it is me being old and jaded, but we're seeing now huge swathes of men being rejected (and for the less physically attractive ones, frequently mistreated / abused) based on these mostly appearance related vibes. However, many women continue to select the same men over and over again, despite those men having immediately visible red flags for being the perpetrators of abuse / assaults. The "intuition" is failing where just a few seconds of thought could prevent the mistake and the consequ… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/02/24 03:10 AM |
| 2 | The reason men "have such low standards" is because they assume that any woman they get with to change to fit the mold of their ideal life.Yeah, I can admit to not understanding it lol. I would argue though that it doesn't exactly work that well when we see so many of these judgements ending up completely wrong with sometimes terrible consequences. Especially when it looks like the slightest bit of thought could avoid it all. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/02/24 02:24 AM |
| 16 | The reason men "have such low standards" is because they assume that any woman they get with to change to fit the mold of their ideal life.That's fair, but I'd say its also a response to how women treat the first date. There's a massive over emphasis on there being immediate physical attraction and "spark" where the man is summarily rejected because she wasn't "wowed" or thinking he's "hot" within minutes. This is playing a huge part in less physically attractive men and introverted men really struggling. They're rarely getting even a chance to date, and even when they do, are judged quickly and mostly superficially. Accordingly, m… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/02/24 01:37 AM |
| – | I feel like women cannot understand the male experienceWell yea, I care about myself. But more than that, I will treat people with basic decency, regardless of whether they're attractive or not. I'll freely talk to people, help them, be kind etc. Because I understand that some don't have it easy. I have more than a shred of empathy. I can categorically state the same courtesy has not been extended to me by the majority of similarly aged women. A good 50% plus refuse to even think of speaking to me because I have an illness affected appearance. A dis… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/02/24 07:57 AM |
| 10 | Debate The importance off social skills is absolutely underrated in modern men.It doesn't matter if you have the social skills when you simply get ignored or abused for your looks. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/24 10:42 PM |
| 15 | How do you explain your dating struggles to your parents?I should've learned pretty quickly that no one gives a shit when it's a guy on the receiving end, but my sense of justice meant I kept fighting and getting angrier. It's why giving up was mentally beneficial for me. Yep, and it's only fair as she helped me when I was the one sick. We get on pretty well, and having separate living areas / tv rooms helps! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/12/23 01:59 AM |
| 19 | How do you explain your dating struggles to your parents?I tried but she (just mum left now) didn't really understand how things are different now. Funnily enough she'd get much more furious when I'd talk about things that happened like getting abused for having an illness etc. or looking different because of it, and couldn't believe nothing would be done when I showed her messages on dating apps from women telling me to kill myself. I think those things helped her "get" how difficult things are for any guy who is different to the norm (I don't think … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/12/23 11:37 PM |
| 6 | Woman who complain about ot being able to find a "good man" just have very high standardsBasic freaking logic. It's not that they're necessarily less likely to be good people than say ugly men (that would be an issue of psychology and the impact of life experiences etc. and you can probably mount a reasonable argument either way), it's that good looking men who are also good people are less likely to be available. Seriously, this isn't a difficult concept. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/12/23 12:41 AM |
| 31 | Woman who complain about ot being able to find a "good man" just have very high standardsThey have one high standard - looks. As a result, they ignore dozens, hundreds, thousands of good men for not meeting that standard. Conversely, the men who do meet that standard are fundamentally less likely to be good men (as the guys who both meet the standard and are good men? They're already taken, or simply well out of her "league"). | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/12/23 08:50 PM |
| – | Men: Stop ComplainingI can understand it. The most I ever did was snap back at a few of the worst things but it's the frustration and the fact people deny that the mistreatment usually comes from the woman first that can lead guys to go too far. Try to imagine that near constantly, despite nothing you do or say, you get the kind of treatment I described. Simply for daring to exist in the same space. There's no respite. No positive experiences in that area. It's just unrelenting. Many guys get depressed, and withdraw… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/12/23 09:32 AM |
| – | Men: Stop ComplainingI think it's over exaggerated how many do react that way / say such things, although they probably do congregate in places like this! For every one you hear saying that crap there are thousands who don't. Who are generally silent, quietly just sad, or still hopeful. The other thing that gets missed a lot (and not in any way excusing the guys who do say those horrible things) is that there is an incredible amount of hatred and abuse flowing the other way from women first and frequently unprovoked… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/12/23 06:38 AM |
| 3 | 5.25% of adults aged 40 and above have never been in a relationship: ramifications?Hey! I won't die fat. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/12/23 06:37 AM |
| 4 | You only think women’s standards are unrealistic because you view them as a monolith.Well no, because there isn't any problem with my self-perception. I've never thought that I was hideously ugly etc, but am aware that I look different to the norm (although lesser as I age, and it maybe doesn't fully come through in a photo). The key thing (that a lot of people seem to have trouble understanding for some reason) is that I looked almost exactly the same (if not worse, e.g. take away about 25kg, any healthy "colour" / life / vibrancy etc.) from 16 - 18 onwards. Context is huge. Yo… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/10/23 08:57 PM |
| 8 | You only think women’s standards are unrealistic because you view them as a monolith.Ah, the caring, empathetic, justification of abuse and blaming the "victim" (i.e. the target / recipient in this context). Tell me, do you think it is acceptable to tell somebody to kill themselves because of how they look? How about saying they are a lesser human because they have an illness? Is it OK in your eyes to mock / insult the sick or disabled for their differences? Because quite simply that is what you have just done. You have flat out claimed it's my fault for being treated like shit … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/10/23 06:35 AM |
| 1 | You only think women’s standards are unrealistic because you view them as a monolith.Thanks, it was sadly a pretty common occurrence. There was literally a period in my early 20's where it was a 50/50 shot as to whether a woman would even reply / speak to me. The most extreme stuff was rare of course, but that's what you remember most vividly. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/10/23 02:56 AM |
| 21 | You only think women’s standards are unrealistic because you view them as a monolith.Oh, I fully recognise I'm an outlier. The thing is a good half of this shit happened without me doing anything. Mere presence was enough at times. It is the sad reality though for an unlucky few. I bother typing it all out on occasion because it just shits me how everyone assumes that to be in my position you must be some kind of monstrous neckbeard or mentally weak etc. I mean, just look at the reply just before yours, textbook "he must have deserved it"! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/10/23 02:50 AM |
| 108 | You only think women’s standards are unrealistic because you view them as a monolith.Just lol. You think this kind of rejection for immutable characteristics happens just once before the guy gives up? Try like several hundred times, or tens / hundreds of thousands of times if you include dating apps. And its not just "polite" rejections. It's openly hateful conduct like telling the guy to kill himself, or viciously abusing the way he looks (even when it's clear it is due to illness or disability etc.), or calling him literally inferior / inherently unlovable because of something… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/10/23 08:27 PM |
| 7 | What is up with the term “tingles”?Yep, and for a different looking / "ugly" man it's correspondingly even harder. You don't even get that date or any chance to show personality or attraction to grow. It's usually instant dismissal. Either simply completely and deliberately ignored, or typecast as "the ugly friend". | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/10/23 09:53 PM |
| – | It seems like men fail to understand that the attention that women get is not the compliment or even a privilegeThe mental side of things is always hard. I've said here before that given the choice between being sick but normal looking, and healthy but looking the same, I'd choose being sick every single time, such is the relative impact of each (and the being sick involves dialysis and transplants). I think for men it's just not the same, we value compliments from other guys, but without anything else there's still a massive hole in your life - e.g. I'm not sure most women really, fully comprehend what i… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/10/23 10:48 PM |
| – | It seems like men fail to understand that the attention that women get is not the compliment or even a privilegeThis right here is the difference. You (likely) get compliments all the time from guys, which you don't value (fair enough, a lot of the time they'll have a certain motive), and comments that you do value as recently as 6 weeks ago. In contrast, I'm a man considered physically unattractive (I'm not even ugly, just different looking due to illness). I rarely receive compliments from other guys (and they're still appreciated), and have never received a single compliment about my appearance from a … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/10/23 10:16 PM |
| 7 | Have you given up before properly starting dating? And why?Thanks. I'm ok mostly. Definitely doing better just not thinking about trying to date or tormenting myself with hopes. It is a hard thing to give up though, so you get sad / lonely / depressed at times. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/09/23 10:48 AM |
| 4 | Have you given up before properly starting dating? And why?Thanks man. In a way, being sick helped. Just dealing with other stuff is a distraction, and you develop the resilience to cope with things. It also taught me to be ok with being at home i.e. with no other choice you just get on with it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/09/23 10:46 AM |
| 13 | Have you given up before properly starting dating? And why?Almost word for word this is my experience - except replace being short with being bald at 18 and having a serious illness. All that meant was I tried a bit longer (closer to 20 years) and I was too much of a wimp to go through with trying to kill myself. The experiences absolutely destroyed my mental health, and what really struck me was the almost sickening lack of anything approaching empathy. The willingness to openly attack my illness and say I was a lesser person because of it. The constan… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/09/23 08:09 AM |
| 3 | Have you ever seen a handsome and successful man struggling with his romantic/sexual relationships? And why?Because having height isn't a winner on its own. I've no doubt lacking height is as brutal as short guys say. But even when you're 6 foot there's plenty of other things that can immediately destroy your chances - e.g. I have a serious illness that affects my appearance (been bald since 16 among other things). Then you've got all the autistic guys who'll still struggle. And those who are just ugly enough they get disregarded on sight. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/09/23 10:16 PM |
| 2 | Most men think they are more physically attractive than they areLucky I have the underrating myself due to depression to balance it out then lol Most less physically attractive guys are left in absolutely no doubt about how low they are rated. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/09/23 03:29 AM |
| 2 | Men: how do you feel about yourself? What do you think of yourself?What do you find attractive about yourself? Easy. My personality. I think I'm a "good" guy. Not the most outgoing (being partly deaf doesn't help there) but smart (law degree and good job), reasonably funny, honest, loyal, have my interests and hobbies (nerdy and sporty), a brilliant small friend group. My self-esteem is fine in most areas, basically everything except dating. Do you feel you have unattractive qualities and what are they if you don't mind sharing? Simply, my appearance. I have a … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/08/23 08:27 PM |
| 7 | Does anyone here believe in love and actually finding someone who cares about them?I did. But 20 years of nothing but being either ignored as a possible dating option or viciously abused by women for the heinous "crime" of looking different due to illness (or even the fact of the illness itself) beat that out of me. Could you keep any hope of finding love in the face of almost constant hatred and mistreatment for things you can't control? After 20 years of ZERO positive experiences in dating, of literally no-one ever finding you physically attractive? When you've been told to … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/23 11:11 PM |
| 17 | Everyone should respect other people’s lived experiencesExactly, or the "women are wonderful" effect comes to the fore and people look to deny the lived experiences tens of thousands of less physically attractive men, refusing to even consider the possibility that women could be openly hateful to those they consider "ugly" and beneath them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/23 11:41 PM |
| 3 | Would you donate an organ for your partner?No, but that's mostly because they'd be useless anyway - I'm an organ thief (transplant recipient) myself. A harder question is whether I'd take one. Not that it's looking likely to be an option, but I'd be leaning towards no. Be hard to hurt / take something away from someone you care about. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/05/23 03:46 AM |
| 5 | Many men who have nothing going for them and are low value try to get high value or attractive women, and then complain and moan that they’re “alone forever” but don’t ever lower their standards.I'll add a third. Many guys only turn to apps after soul destroying real life experiences. App or real life, many men are simply ignored on sight alone, and even if she can get to know you in real life it rarely changes the immediate initial decision that you're not good looking enough to be a dating option. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/04/23 03:51 AM |
| 14 | In complete honesty…what exactly do most of you on here want?I mean, my story is pretty unique but basically straightforward. Illness basically destroyed my appearance from around 16 and as a result in terms of dating I've really only had negative experiences (abused for looking different, brutal and hateful / offensive rejections such as being told to kill myself and that I'm undateable due to being sick). This of course has led to depression, social anxiety, and increasing shyness. The fact I'm partly deaf doesn't help either. Despite the limitations I'… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/04/23 02:57 AM |
| 10 | Do men actually have it better dating wise ?Lol, 1-3 matches a week! To put it in context, it took you less than a month what it took me 10 years to get as a man with an illness affected appearance - not even "ugly", just different to the norm. And even then none of them showed the slightest hint of being physically attracted to me. I get that it sucks being mistreated by guys, but at some level that is within your control and there is a tangible hope that one time it'll be different. For the less physically attractive guy that hope is de… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/04/23 03:11 AM |
| 22 | How do women honestly feel about guys that are genuinely going about improving themselves but still can’t get laid?That's fair. I think the problem is though that people instantly assume the latter, no matter how many times lonely men tell them it's the former. It's an issue of expression as well, many men are conditioned to hide their feelings, as well as lacking the ability to explain the loneliness to people who don't understand (and often don't care to try to understand), so they use sex as a simplification of the desire to be loved. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/04/23 08:38 PM |
| 5 | So where exactly are these ugly women?Sorry, but I've fucked up this reply by accidentally hitting post... I am sorry in advance for playing the "who has it worse" shit, No worries, I was a little defensive probably in my reply, I see the negative treatment of guys disregarded and minimised so often it just shits me too. We can only speak from our experiences. It's funny as I've seen it the other way a bit, but I probably just notice it more as it hits so close to home. I guess for ugly people looks are the first line of attack even… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/03/23 09:55 AM |
| 20 | So where exactly are these ugly women?Not to discount or diminish your friends experiences (I personally know how much this kind of treatment sucks) but this is exactly what happens to less physically attractive men, almost constantly in some cases. The biggest differences are that it takes a lot less to send many women into making hateful and abusive comments (i.e. a far greater proportion of men experience this), and that this kind of treatment is normalised and accepted to do to men. And it's not just frustration, this is open ha… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/03/23 03:25 AM |
| 12 | Women here advise guys to "touch grass" and "talk to actual women" yet stigmatize and threat profile men for approaching themHow can you not realise that this doesn't happen easily for less physically attractive young men? That many women will openly abuse those who look different. Being "creepy" has nothing to do with it. I did a law degree (5 years) as a guy who had already started balding significantly due to illness. The most common reactions to me joining a group conversation or simply trying to be social were to be literally ignored e.g. the women (and some of the men) deliberately refusing to acknowledge my pre… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/03/23 10:54 PM |
| 3 | Do you really struggle with dating and what is your relationship status?It's a genetic kidney disease, I've already had a couple of transplants. There are other things associated / combined that make it suck more - e.g. I'm partly deaf which is a symptom of it, and one of the hardest things was going bald at 16, that was gonna happen at some point anyway, being sick just brought it forward. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/03/23 09:27 PM |
| 7 | Do you really struggle with dating and what is your relationship status?Never been on a real date or had anyone even show the slightest hint of being physically attracted to me. I'm 36 so it's pretty fair to say I struggle. My experience basically consists of having an illness affected appearance and either being simply ignored on sight (e.g. either literally refusing to acknowledge my existence, or simply making it abundantly and often aggressively clear that I wasn't welcome / a possible dating option) or outright abused for looking different (I don't think I'm pa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/03/23 07:07 AM |
| 2 | Would you sign a contract with a dating agency, to date someone they choose for you, for a week?Yeah, I'd say I've given up trying (no apps, not really putting myself out there as much irl etc.) but not hope, if that makes sense. I'm on antidepressants and I get free therapy (courtesy of being sick), the rest of my life's pretty ok, I have a hard job which helps. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/03/23 09:23 PM |
| 2 | Would you sign a contract with a dating agency, to date someone they choose for you, for a week?They're just very expensive dating apps for less physically attractive men. I was with one for two years just pre-covid, and had 3 "matches" / setups @ around 1,000 bucks each. Bearing in mind I got this at half price because the woman running it felt sorry for me after I explained my dating history (literally none, but plenty of abuse for having an illness affected appearance). The first ghosted me over text - didn't even reply to messages about setting up a first meeting. The second ghosted me… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/03/23 09:03 PM |
| 1 | Single men, what are your standards?1) body type Not significantly overweight. Maybe "chubby" would be the limit. Shows that they care about health. I'm maybe slightly overweight - it's kinda hard to tell (about 86kg). And that's after two kidney transplants (which sit in my lower abs on the front), and being on appetite stimulating drugs for 8 years now. 2) height Don't really care but just not ridiculously short in comparison. I'm scraping 6 foot (probably shrunk to 5'11.5 now lol). 3) income/ education Would prefer uni educatio… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/03/23 11:56 AM |
| 2 | Men in your 30s, do you actually not want to date women in their 30s?I'd have no problem. But I am 36 with basically zero experience and so the issue is finding any woman within a reasonable age range who has no problem with that and can understand why it's the case. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/03/23 03:54 AM |
| 0 | What do you think has lead to a decline in men "putting themselves out there"?See, but that's the problem these days. Most women just aren't taking that time. They're so bombarded with options that if you're a man who is less physically attractive or different looking you're immediately dismissed as a possible partner. Even outside of dating apps my sole experience trying to date / socialise with women as a guy with an illness affected appearance (not even "ugly", I just went bald as a teenager among other things) was simply being ignored or mistreated / abused (we're tal… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/02/23 05:49 AM |
| 18 | Most young men are single. Most young women are not. Why?The funny / sad thing is that the good men are in the same place they've always been - literally right in front of them. But they ignored them on sight alone for 20 years, shattered their confidence through insults and abuse, and told them they weren't good enough. The good men were either lucky enough to find a good woman, or they gave up. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/02/23 09:08 PM |
| 4 | Men, delete your dating profiles IMMEDIATELYOh, agree on some of that, I know my looks are considered well below average (due to illness affecting my appearance), so I'm for sure I'm an outlier. And there are definitely plenty of guys who give up to easily, don't put in any effort etc. In my case though we are talking like literally zero matches, and open abuse in public. There are a few of us who do genuinely experience this and it's incredibly frustrating to not even be recognised as an option, or barely even as a human at times. My per… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/01/23 07:27 AM |
| 1 | Men, delete your dating profiles IMMEDIATELYSee, I find that difficult to believe, mostly because as a below average looking guy the effort it takes to even get a response is incredible. So the chances of that happening twice, at the same time, gotta be pretty low. That said, don't doubt that below average guys can be dicks. The simple part to me is (by my age, 30's) it should be relatively obvious that good looking guys are single for a reason, that is more likely to be about their personality. With the below average looking guys there i… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/01/23 07:10 AM |
| 3 | Men, delete your dating profiles IMMEDIATELYExactly. I'm not worried about this happening to me. It could even be a good thing if women were to follow the basic logic here and stop choosing the same types of guys again and again (hint: they won't). | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/01/23 06:59 AM |
| 1 | Who is your most unsuccessful (romantically and sexually) guy you know? Describe himSee, I'd love to find someone who thought that way but a lot of people are very entitled now. The few times I've met people who don't immediately disregard me on looks alone, they've tended to bail on hearing about the illness. The last one (just last year) was almost psychotic in the lies she'd told herself to justify treating me like shit, utterly convinced herself that I'd resent her health and be jealous of her past, that I'd die young so there was no point smh. I'm pretty open, e.g. I give … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/01/23 09:45 PM |
| 8 | Who is your most unsuccessful (romantically and sexually) guy you know? Describe himI love how after reading my story your first thought is to try a "gotcha" question. Says it all, really. But to answer your question I would have no hesitation in dating someone who was also ill, although I do worry that they deserve better than someone in my position. Shits hard enough with one person having these issues. It's not exactly easy to find them though! Plenty of people in these circumstances give up completely very early, and we're a very small group to begin with. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/01/23 09:36 PM |
| 4 | Who is your most unsuccessful (romantically and sexually) guy you know? Describe himIt'd be difficult to go overseas as all my doctors etc. are here and honestly I have it pretty sweet from that perspective, I don't pay much whereas in the US for example I know I'd probably be hundreds of thousands in debt. I am thinking of at least trying overseas online, I'm in Australia so there are plenty of SE Asian women who would want to live here, just wary of being taken advantage of / the culture gap. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/01/23 09:32 PM |
| 16 | Who is your most unsuccessful (romantically and sexually) guy you know? Describe himOf course I know him, he's me! Long story so: TL/DR - due to illness I'm a visible outlier, and because I looked different my only experience is being ignored or straight up abused. I'm basically living proof that the first (and often only) thing that matters is looks. Also I'm an excellent example of how being mistreated can harm a guy's mental health and change their behaviour. I was a well above average teenager (aside from one major thing outlined below). Went to a good school on a scholarsh… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/01/23 12:34 PM |
| 5 | Men love women more than women could ever love men.It's a tricky one to me. I mean my experience is that after a relationship is established it can go both ways (e.g. both men and women may leave or stay), but the kicker is that before that point I've only ever experienced women bailing at the slightest hint that things may not be perfect. Like to the extent that for guys suffering illness or disability the most common advice is always to never reveal it, or if that's not possible, to downplay any impact. As a guy with a serious illness that's c… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/01/23 11:45 AM |
| 17 | How many PPD guys be like this?Exactly. My hair was worse than that by 18. All I've ever experienced was being ignored or straight up abused for it. But women still try to claim it doesn't matter, and then berate you for lacking confidence, when the years of abuse from them is the very reason you lack confidence. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/12/22 05:06 AM |
| 22 | I miss r/chadfish.Then reported and banned if they're ugly | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/12/22 12:59 AM |
| 2 | Men Now Face More Unrealistic Beauty StandardsMy entire life lol As a guy who is an obvious outlier (illness affected appearance, went bald as a teenager among other visible "flaws"), I can tell you that there are 4 broad categories of women in terms of how I was / am treated. I think this can be extrapolated to most "ugly" guys but obviously this has never been studied. For reference I'm 36 so have seen this for about 20 years. First, a very small percentage (maybe 1 to 2 percent) were absolutely vicious. This is the group I refer to when … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/12/22 12:42 AM |
| 2 | Why do you require someone who is “college educated”?Haha, not even just frat bros. Sure, I'm in a different country, but my friend group of 90% lawyers literally talk shit, love sports, and bonded through extended drinking sessions. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/12/22 10:59 PM |
| 16 | How many here are still virgins in their 20s? What is your reason for that?I was into my 30's, and really still am except I've been to escorts a few times. The reason is pretty simple but at the same time evolving. I have an illness that seriously affects my appearance. Among other things I went bald as a teenager, looked anaemic / very underweight, medication induced acne. etc. That destroyed any chance as a teen / early 20's, plus lead to a barrage of vicious personal abuse (which continues to an extent to this day), shattering my confidence in dating too. If that wa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/11/22 03:49 AM |
| 4 | Single Men vs Single WomenI'm the same. While I want to share / vent sometimes and get support from my friends, and they are pretty understanding, I worry / hold back because I fear it's boring or too negative. Plus, in the limited time with friends at my age, I want to enjoy the time too rather than focus only on the shit / non-existent aspect of my life. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/11/22 10:43 PM |
| 2 | Do you think gym maxing works for men who are considerably unattractive?Sure | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/11/22 06:36 AM |
| 2 | Do you think gym maxing works for men who are considerably unattractive?if you are some skinny fat dude with a George Constanza hairline? It certainly won’t hurt, but I am skeptical it will be game changing. I'll let you know if there's any improvement at some point next year lol. Zero success in the past (my only experiences in dating are being deliberately ignored or straight up abused for my illness affected appearance), and I'm currently a few months into a really solid effort (after finally overcoming health issues). I could be too old (36) or jaded / depressed… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/11/22 04:49 AM |
| 3 | Most men don't get laid because they don't approach and talk to enough womenMy count is zero for precisely the same reason. No matter who you are or what you have to offer etc., if you're dismissed as an option based on your looks then it's incredibly rare that you can change their mind. Especially not now when they can find a guy they are physically attracted to at the wave or swipe of a hand! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/11/22 11:18 PM |
| 0 | It is just harder and therefore lonely and sad for a lot of guysThank you! This needed to be said. Especially as there have been some really offensive comments on here the past few days basically saying that sick and disabled men don't deserve a chance at love because they were ignored when they were young (i.e. hadn't dated etc by a certain age). The usual suspects were getting into real hateful territory by claiming guys like me (appearance affected by illness, and consequently abused for that) were mentally and socially inferior. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/11/22 12:40 PM |
| 2 | CMV: Men who are inexperienced with relationships/sex should just lie about itIdk maybe I'm overthinking it Maybe. But it's a common enough trait for guys like us (I'm same position as you but 8 years older). I don't lie about it, honestly I'd rather be single than be in a relationship with someone who is incapable of empathy / understanding about my circumstances (serious illness thats affected my appearance). You're absolutely right about damned if you do, damned if you don't though. The other catch 22 that gets me is the whole "we love confident and experienced (presel… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/11/22 02:29 AM |
| 3 | Do you think attraction is mostly looks?Looks are the first and often only thing that get considered. It's repeatedly been said that looks get your foot in the door and personality etc. can keep it open. What people refuse to admit is that if the door gets slammed on your foot because you're a below average looking / different looking / "ugly" man, then no matter what you do or who you are it isn't going to open later. Not in a world where there is no shortage of opportunities to meet other guys who have the looks to get their foot in… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/11/22 03:26 AM |
| 2 | The advice women give here should be prefaced with "for ugly or average men only".Thanks man, I'm all good these days health-wise, well, as good as possible! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/10/22 03:23 AM |
| 1 | The advice women give here should be prefaced with "for ugly or average men only".This can happen. Especially to young men who look different / "ugly" enough, although it wasn't all women. For example, I have an illness affected appearance (went bald as a teenager among other things) and there were plenty of women who refused to acknowledge my existence or respond. My personal "record" was a girl at uni in the same degree who completely and intentionally blanked me for 5 years! Our close friends even dated so it wasn't like a one-off. The other thing that happens (and that wa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/10/22 02:49 AM |
| 3 | Male cognitive dissonance has not taken over this subLol. If they learned from mistakes they wouldn't be single. It's telling how you are intolerant of mistakes. Are you perfect? A genuine person who makes a mistake is still better than someone who never learned they're mistakes in the first place because they never got punished. And yeah, I was probably just following the original comment with the rich and tall. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/10/22 03:03 AM |
| 2 | Male cognitive dissonance has not taken over this subThat makes no sense. It's literally the opposite. You think the taller and richer dude will be a better bf because of the halo effect (he looks good so he must be a great person). In reality, it's this dude who is running around treating women like shit because he gets away with it. He's never seen any consequences of his actions. Also true in the reverse. You think the uglier guy is a bad person, without any basis in reality, just because he isn't good looking. Now, there's no guarantee the ugl… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/10/22 02:50 AM |
| 3 | Women do not like baldness everI started to go bald at 16, mostly gone by 21. My sole experience has been to be simply ignored or openly abused for how I look. We're talking being told to kill myself, treated with hateful contempt, and physically assaulted. Not to mention a near constant barrage of insults, mockery and sick pranks. Now, my baldness was caused in part by illness so there were a few other things going on (thin, pale, medication induced "acne" - that's hard to describe), but overall it's pretty safe to say that … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/10/22 11:34 PM |
| 8 | Q4M: If dating apps largely favour women, why is it disproportionately men who are on them?Hope / Desperation I can only speak as a different / below average looking guy, but after years of being either ignored or abused in real life, dating apps begin to look very appealing. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/10/22 05:33 AM |
| 7 | If women approached men more, would there be less men identifying as incels?One that is difficult to escape from. I'm still objectively below average in looks even though I'm no longer such a huge outlier (illness affected appearance, bald as a teenager, obviously looked sick etc.). The other problem though is that I'm now 36 and have only ever experienced being ignored or brutally abused / told to kill myself / literally assaulted. 15 years of that treatment takes an incredible mental toll, not to mention shattering your self-esteem and any confidence you have in tryin… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/10/22 09:46 PM |
| 2 | Why should average or below average men approach women anymore?The point being though that if he wasn't hot, you most likely would've never noticed him. Or if you did, never even considered him an option for that role. It annoys me that everyone assumes "ugly" guys never leave the house and have never tried. Most of us have done so for years, decades even, with nothing but abuse to show for it. It's extremely rare these days that a woman's mind is changed by exposure over time. If you're not even recognised as an option immediately then you are basically do… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/10/22 10:21 PM |
| 2 | Delight and Camaraderie in HumiliationAnd the disparity is massive. For every incel that snaps and kills women, there are thousands, probably tens of thousands who die alone, crippled by the constant abuse they've received from women. Not to mention the staggering number who kill themselves in their despair. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/10/22 10:23 PM |
| 1 | Would you be cautious getting into a serious relationship with a guy who's had an unsuccessful sexual past?Can't see the automod, so... Same question, but the guy is / was considered physically unattractive. I mean, if being "ugly" / looking different is the only (well, major) reason the guy has never dated? Or, basically, is there any hope for me? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/10/22 01:46 AM |
| 2 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadNah, that's too risky. Just wait for nature to take it's course, and have an air-tight prenup to get your share. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/10/22 01:12 AM |
| 7 | Women say they don’t want to “mother” their man, but expect the guy to “daddy” herHaha, spiders yes, snakes no. I can handle a spider, but snakes scare the shit out of me. At least I'm safe from the snek menace in my Sydney apartment. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/10/22 03:36 AM |
| 66 | Can a man truly give up on sex and be happy ?The early signs from my decision to give up (after 20 years of being ignored and even abused / literally assaulted for my illness affected appearance) are not positive. I don't really know how to stop hoping. As much as I believe I'm trapped in the "ugly" / different-looking man's paradox (basically the idea that any woman who is a good enough person to not judge me first / solely on my appearance has had zero trouble finding relationships and is unlikely to be still single), I find it difficult… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/09/22 09:58 AM |
| 4 | The idea that “if you were truly good looking/socially savvy you wouldn’t be struggling” is a huge fallacy here. Due to women’s inflated egos, even attractive men struggle.It's ridiculous isn't it? These days you're not even going to get a chance to show you can have fun together if she's already dismissed you as an option based on how you look. Anyone at this point pretending that appearance is the number 1 initial factor and everything else comes after is just delusional. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/09/22 01:09 AM |
| 12 | Most average males should not bother with most women unless they are really willing to lower their standards.I think most of "us" (average and below guys) get that, but you may underestimate the cumulative effect. E.g. I'm pretty much by definition a below average looking guy (went bald as a teenager, have a serious illness which impacts how I look), and I have literally never had a positive experience in the dating context. I'm 36. Try to imagine going through that. 20 or so years of solid, constant, rejection. Almost always due to something you can't control or change. With not a single "sucess" to k… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/09/22 12:34 PM |
| 14 | Women and men who don’t do hookups, where do you hang out?Precisely, dating apps were the great hope that could possibly help people like me, but look how that's turned out lol | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/09/22 01:42 PM |
| 4 | Ladies, let's talk about....hair!I don't think that's what a lot are saying. Plenty of the replies are saying they would not even think of giving the guy a chance, but they're ok with it now that they're partner of many years (i.e. they got together while he had a full head of hair) is starting to lose it. As someone who started balding as a teenager and it was all gone by 21, this reflects my reality. Until at least early 30's I was only ever flat out ignored or openly abused for not having hair. And my hair loss was due to il… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/08/22 12:23 AM |
| 3 | Gen Z is alot more ruthless about baldingI don't know about the younger generation but it was bad enough as a millennial who went bald as a teenager. And mine was due to / accelerated early because of illness (it would have happened eventually anyway most likely), so I wasn't able to do some of the things that can help like bulking up, not being extremely pale etc. I've shared a few of my experiences here before, and there definitely was a next level contempt and sense of cruelty by women my age towards men who looked different (not th… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/08/22 05:47 AM |
| 22 | The “online dating is not real life” argument has become obsolete in this decadeIf anything, the real world drives some guys to online dating. I suspect I'm older than most guys here, but I didn't even start online dating until I was 26 (10 years ago), and the main driver was that I (as a different / well below average looking guy) could no longer handle the consistent personal insults and other forms of mistreatment, in person. Online dating was a protective mechanism. Sure, people still abuse me for my appearance etc. but it's easier to take when it's not in your face and… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/07/22 07:33 AM |
| 3 | Question for the women on here & I want you to genuinely think about it rather than impulsively answering.You could almost be my sister lol The ages are different slightly but I hope my experiences have helped her be more forgiving in thr same way. Lost my hair in my late teens and have been treated absolutely brutally for it (never had anyone show any physical attraction or see me as an option, constant insults, abuse and even occasional physical violence). I even have a kidney problem and have had transplants! Not from my sister although it could eventually be an option. The real damage looking di… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/22 01:06 PM |
| 7 | What Is The Biggest Risk Factor That Someone Will Still Be A Virgin By 30? (Not By Choice)Not fully beat up, it was women doing it and just limited to being spat at and you know pushed / hit from behind. The guys definitely got it, they saw most of the stuff going on etc. The girls tried at first to set me up etc. but once it became glaringly apparent that no matter how well I got on with someone they were never interested in that way (to the extent that the set ups would literally end up hooking up with guys they didn't really like or want to see again) they stopped. My friends are … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/22 04:47 AM |
| 18 | What Is The Biggest Risk Factor That Someone Will Still Be A Virgin By 30? (Not By Choice)Absolutely. I don't get how this can even be a debate. If you have "abnormal" / different / well below average looks such that you are literally never even seen as a possible romantic / dating option then it's very difficult. I went bald as a teenager (due to illness which meant there were also some other "negative" impacts on my appearance). Aside from a complete lack of a dating life and the treatment for my illness my life was completely normal, parties, social life, sport, law degree, good j… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/07/22 11:17 PM |
| 12 | Men and women here, how many actual options do you have?Well, I was pretty massively depressed from my late teens to early 30's, it's hard when you try and try and try and get the same negative treatment for something you can't change, you really lose hope. Ironically, being sick probably helped a bit as it gave an "excuse", i.e. "well, what can I do about that anyway?" and you just accept that it's gonna be really difficult. You realise that you have to find a unicorn, and it's kind of freeing. Plus I did kinda have bigger problems like trying to co… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/07/22 12:50 PM |
| 21 | Men and women here, how many actual options do you have?M35 - literally none. I have never had anyone physically attracted to me or show any interest. At best I'm simply ignored on sight for having an illness affected appearance, and have occasionally been abused and even physically assaulted for the same. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/07/22 09:12 AM |
| 2 | CMV: Lack of Sexual/Relational Attraction Isn't Attributed to a Lack of Self-Improvement or Concurrent ValueThe point I think the OP is making is that there can be (and are) other guys who have similar personalities etc. to your husband who have had literally zero success in dating. And that this is not their fault (i.e. due to their actions or personality), nor are they any lesser people, despite being treated as such and blamed for their position. I'd go as far as using myself as an example. Trying to be objective as possible I'd say I have a lot of those same qualities, although perhaps I'm less po… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/07/22 05:42 AM |
| 7 | Do you think in the next couple of decades MAINSTREAM discourse will be "don't encourage average/below average men to expect or seek sex, love and relationships"?I have to say that this is fundamentally untrue in my experience. This is literally what I as a man with an illness affected appearance offer as a minimum, not to mention that my experiences with illness mean I am far better equipped to deliver this than the average person. I definitely don't have excess muscles, have never had a one night stand or even looked for one (honestly, I doubt I'm even capable of doing that), and fwiw I'd say my attitude is in no way demeaning. My dating life has consi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/06/22 11:32 PM |
| 2 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadYou are now king of PPD for the day. What are your royal commands? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/06/22 12:16 PM |
| 4 | Why are men expected to not be upset about their dating struggles?Because a lot of the time that is a fair characterisation. The man is putting in sometimes decades of effort, can be successful in almost all other facets of life, and still is getting constantly (even exclusively) rejected on sight alone, often for things he has no ability to change. And the second he dares complain about the double standards, the physically impossible (for him) thresholds, and the despair that this enduring state of romantic loneliness results in, he is bombarded with (for wan… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 09:09 AM |
| 2 | According To A Study, Women Are Actually Happier With Less Attractive MenI was planning for this to be my niche, your hubby beat me to it! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/06/22 05:32 AM |
| 3 | Do you think the same thing as in Japan is gonna happen to the entire world when western lifestyle/values/culture spreads everywhere?I'm sorry to hear that, many people can be cruel. Outside of the dating context it was more just indifference i.e. people just assumed I was a lot older etc. It's the more outrageous ones that stick with you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/22 09:15 AM |
| 1 | Do you think the same thing as in Japan is gonna happen to the entire world when western lifestyle/values/culture spreads everywhere?Yeah, I should've added a paragraph at the end there. There are not a lot of people in my position (for obvious reasons) and I would agree that there are plenty of guys who could do something to improve their chances. But there are certainly some people who can't change things, and we tend to get lost among the more aggressive / visible complainers. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/22 09:05 AM |
| 3 | Do you think the same thing as in Japan is gonna happen to the entire world when western lifestyle/values/culture spreads everywhere?No longer being ignored / dismissed on sight alone all the time. Feel like I've reached "the next stage" where I'm experiencing the thing where it's a challenge as a guy finding someone who puts effort into conversations etc. In saying that, my experiences and illness etc. mean I'll "need" a very special type of person, and people like that aren't often still single! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/22 08:54 AM |
| 15 | Do you think the same thing as in Japan is gonna happen to the entire world when western lifestyle/values/culture spreads everywhere?I think you underestimate just how viciously you can be treated solely for looking different as a man. My appearance is significantly affected by illness (I went bald as a teenager among other things) and the abuse from women was literally constant in the dating context. At best I was just flat out ignored, at worst, told to kill myself, that I didn't deserve basic decency and should die alone, physically assaulted and that doesn't even cover the range of casual insults. Just one major visible "… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/22 08:45 AM |
| 3 | How do you feel when you see a not so attractive guy with a girlfriend?I'd have to see it first. My first thought would generally be he must have looked better when he was younger, because I have never seen it with guys under at least 40. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/06/22 04:16 AM |
| 2 | Assuming the individual takes personal responsibility, what are the legitimate intersexual grievances today?I can only add myself and the few in my category - "people with appearance affected by illness". I've made a few comments setting out my experiences so won't repeat them, but the simple issue is that it's taken until my mid thirties for me to even be recognised as a human and a possible dating option Throughout my teens and twenties my sole experiences involved being flat out ignored or less commonly abused and even physically assaulted. All for things I can't change etc. We're a very small grou… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/22 04:24 AM |
| 3 | Who are the low value men?Surprised I had to scroll so far to see the simple and correct answer. We guys can have all the great traits in the world, but if you're considered physically unattractive then you are seen as low value. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/22 02:09 AM |
| 3 | What is an average woman to you?That made me actually, audibly lol | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/22 12:04 AM |
| 1 | There is no difference in how attraction works between the sex'sYeah man, just agreeing with you! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/06/22 12:13 AM |
| 1 | There is no difference in how attraction works between the sex'sIt's just too funny at this point. The whole "example" doesn't even consider the fact that she's likely there with the 6'4 dude while the short balding guy is eating alone in the corner, and got an imternal "ew" as she walked in. She might notice that he was nice to the server, but he simply hasn't even registered as someone who could be a date. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/06/22 12:03 AM |
| 39 | Lack of relevant social circles is bad, here's the main reason.Yep, by that point a lot of groups have formed and being added isn't easy, which is where the "just join a new group of friends falls down". I'm in this exact situation, not even considered a possible option on looks alone when I was younger, so missed out on having any opportunities then. Have a close friend group and I am literally the only one who is single, and have been for the last 10 years (i.e. almost everyone else found someone when we were at uni or very soon after). Only one guy was s… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/06/22 02:21 AM |
| 2 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadNot just survived - was the MVP! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/06/22 10:25 AM |
| 3 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadFirst! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/06/22 10:01 AM |
| 16 | What were you told about attracting the opposite sex as you were growing up?Both irl and on dating apps, more often on the latter, but the former included acquaintances e.g. girls I knew in my degree at uni. Many of the girls in real life made it abundantly clear that I wasn't even a man to them - i.e. that I just wasn't even on anyone's radar as someone to date. It wasn't just girls although they were the most aggressive, when I started to lose my hair in high school I found out pretty quickly who my real friends were and those who thought it was ok to belittle my deva… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/05/22 11:56 AM |
| 45 | What were you told about attracting the opposite sex as you were growing up?Like many guys I was constantly told that women didn't care about looks as much, and that as long as I was respectful, nice, a good person etc. I would find someone. Having a good career was emphasised too. My god was that a lie. Even after illness destroyed my appearance in high school, people kept saying that women were attracted to personality, and that it didn't matter that I was being abused for my appearance now, that this would eventually change. This has continued to violently clash with… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/05/22 11:45 AM |
| 17 | Is it really that common for men to have bad hygiene that many girls here have to mention it as a disqualifier?Absolutely. The number of times people try to claim the ugly / different looking guy is unsuccessful because of "his attitude" is incredible when it's blatantly obvious the guy never even gets a chance to show that "attitude" or personality. It's the reverse halo effect where people will convince themselves the guy must be terrible because they can't admit the real reason he struggles is because of looks, because that makes them look bad. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/05/22 12:40 AM |
| 120 | Is dating actually fun for you?The actual dating part is usually fun, I like talking to new people etc. It's the constant struggle as a below average looking guy to even find one woman who is willing to treat me with basic decency, the abuse, the lies, and the complete lack of positive interactions or empathy that is hard. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/22 11:05 AM |
| 3 | How difficult has dating been for YOU?Apologies for the essay!! Practically impossible so far - I have literally never had anyone show any interest or consider me physically attractive enough to even think of me as a dating option. I do still have some (faint now) hope that things could change and there have been some slight improvements. I am 35 though, and my experiences so far have caused incredible distress, massive depression, and changes to my lifestyle / personality that makes things harder. The simple truth is that it's been… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/22 03:02 AM |
| 1 | People in the manosphere are deeply ungrateful and victims of their own mindsYeah, I tried matchmaking and that didn't really work. Something like speed dating is a thought too. At my age things are seemingly getting better on the apps as well, like I'm not such an obvious outlier appearance wise as we all get older and shittier looking lol I go through phases of being really depressed about things and other times where I don't really care. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/22 06:55 AM |
| 1 | People in the manosphere are deeply ungrateful and victims of their own mindsIt's good and bad. Good because I wouldn't want to be with someone who judges me for that stuff, and at least they're not lying. Howecer it's bad because it's really frustrating to be told again and again that unchangeable appearance factors mean you're not considered attractive at all. It's hard to describe to those who've had it "normal" but basically my appearance has been affected to the level where I've genuinely not had anyone physically attracted to me and I'm 35. That is, while most peop… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/22 06:20 AM |
| 3 | People in the manosphere are deeply ungrateful and victims of their own mindsThat's a fair point, but the main issue seems to be that many men aren't even getting a chance to consider compatibility. For example I'm similar to the other commenter here but a few "points" down the scale (health related appearance problems) and it's exceedingly rare that women even deign to talk to me i.e. most of the time I'm simply dismissed as a possible option on sight alone (or on rarer occasions just abused). I always thought I was a massive outlier, but so many guys seem to be having … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/22 03:58 AM |
| 3 | How many of you men here are actually In shape?Lol, read it again | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/22 10:54 AM |
| 4 | How many of you men here are actually In shape?I'm just on 6 ft and 91kg which probably puts me in the very slightly overweight category @ 35. Not overly muscular but for context I have had two kidney transplants, need to take appetite stimulating meds, and am unfortunately injury prone due to the illness. I'm constantly getting fatfished and told by girls who literally waddle that I'm too ugly for them to consider dating, all because of how illness affects my appearance. Essentially I'm living proof of the double standards that exist. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/22 09:04 AM |
| 3 | Correlation between intelligence/education and meeting women?That's a very common misconception. A good number of lawyers will never see the inside of a court room, most of the work is done behind the scenes involving lots of reading. I suppose some level is needed around the office. I'm not terrible at socialising in any case, my problem has been almost 20 years of being ignored on sight alone in a dating context. There's a huge difference between being acceptable as a friend, and being considered a dating option. Can't tell you the number of times I've … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/05/22 09:05 PM |
| 22 | Correlation between intelligence/education and meeting women?I think it's got more to do with neuroticism and overthinking than just being smart. I have glaringly obvious appearance issues that meant I missed out on a lot of things most people in their teens and early twenties take for granted, but now those are becoming less of an issue there's still the problem that I've become even more shy, over analytical, and lacking in confidence - even though in other areas (e.g. work - I'm a lawyer / tax consultant) I have no problems. I wouldn't be surprised if … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/05/22 08:55 AM |
| 2 | CMV: Black women are the least desirable in the dating world today.I've lost count. I am a guy who looks different (not even that ugly) due to illness, and have since my mid teens. Things are better now (and it's taken until my mid-thirties for this to happen) although the outright hate hasn't completely stopped. Seriously, last month alone one woman told me she flat out wouldn't even talk to me because I was sick. I've had women tell me to give up and kill myself, that I'm too ugly to date, that I don't deserve basic decency or happiness (in response to me rea… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/05/22 10:45 AM |
| 11 | CMV: Black women are the least desirable in the dating world today.I know lol... She refers to dating multiple men. Men with just one undesirable trait (be it race, height, lack of hair, poor job or whatever) would kill to have that privilege. Instead, at best we can hope to be ignored, while frequently enduring abuse for existing. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/05/22 09:44 AM |
| 1 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadThat should be gold! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/05/22 10:13 AM |
| 1 | Have you even had a hookup/relationship with a man considered ugly?I'm just wondering how if so many women are answering 'yes' I've never managed to come across one in the wild lol | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/04/22 05:08 AM |
| -1 | paying for the first dateSame thoughts here, I just don't sweat it, it's not like you're "losing" an important amount. Plan to pay but if she offers to share I'm not going to overthink things or say no. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/04/22 08:50 AM |
| 4 | Q4W: If you discovered a man wore a hair piece after having sex with him, how would you feel?A lifetime of abuse since going bald at 16 good enough? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/04/22 11:22 AM |
| 1 | Virginity is a choiceIt's the social stigma as well. As yet another guy who personally shatters OPs delusions I never really even thought about seeing an escort until at least 30. Always hoping that eventually things would change and there'd be someone who didn't dismiss me as an option on sight alone. Even then no-one really suggested it either until a random convo with an old mate. The eventual decision at 34 was pretty "spur of the moment" and I wasn't even in my own State (it'd fully legal in my country). It's a… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/04/22 11:06 PM |
| 1 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadAnd bold to assume English isn't their first language anyway lol | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/03/22 11:52 PM |
| 1 | It is still acceptable to body-shame men, especially for baldness.Can only agree. I've mentioned my experiences here before (went bald at 16 due to illness and have experienced near constant contempt and abuse in the dating world because of it), and the main caveat I'd add is that both genders feel free to body shame men for things like this, although in my experience at least men at least were less likely to (probably because they recognise it might happen to them too at some point). The frustration and devastation you feel because you can't change it is huge… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/03/22 10:54 PM |
| 3 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadClicked on the link and it was exactly what I thought. A true classic! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/03/22 12:32 PM |
| 3 | People with siblings of the opposite gender, did it influene your view on who has it easier?It's a pretty interesting question, I wouldn't say it changed my opinion overall but my sisters experience did show it isn't always as easy as you think as a guy. It did highlight how your personality can impact that though. As we're both fairly shy and don't rush into things - maybe "conservative" is the right word to say. Both of us definitely have limited experience and we're both in our thirties. Fact is though, she gets to impose her own conditions (i.e. she's largely single by choice) wher… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/03/22 03:17 AM |
| 2 | CMV - Women are more shallow than MenI don't want to necessarily argue with you (because you make good points and seem reasonable), but would point out that having an appearance that changes from the "norm" due to illnesss is often treated as a deformity or similar, by both men and women. Personally I found women far more vicious in their treatment than men. I went bald due to illness as a teenager, and instead of women just being "less attracted to me" the response was near constant, brutal, personal abuse including literal assaul… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/22 12:52 AM |
| 2 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadNah, they all say "no homo" before each bout just to be safe of course | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/03/22 02:38 AM |
| 3 | Introverts are more likely to be involuntarily single. Thus confirming that you have to 'put yourself out there' in order to meet people and develop interactions that turn into relationships. This is a hard truth for manyYep, and as a man you grow up believing this, when you hit reality it can be incredibly damaging. The realisation that no matter who you are as a person you are judged solely on your looks first as a possible dating option, and if you 'fail' that for example in my case due to an illness affected appearance you end up either being ignored or abused for things you can't change. That leads to depression, social anxiety (trying to avoid the abuse), becoming increasingly introverted and a homebody), … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/03/22 09:09 PM |
| 1 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadMine is shocking, like the optometrist says even with the glasses I'm getting toward the borderline of being unable to drive unless I get surgery. The scary thing is that legally I could drive without glasses - i.e. last time I renewed my license I passed the eye test without them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/02/22 08:09 PM |
| 5 | It's annoying how many obese women describe themselves as "curvy", then complain that they can't find a "high-value man". r/WAATGM is here to give these kweens a clue.A big part too is the attempted shaming of anyone who says that they're not attracted to fat women | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 26/02/22 05:22 AM |
| 18 | How many dudes in here are actually in a relationship?Haha, fair enough, I think I'm past that lol and have no shame in "admitting" I've always been single. Most people are decent enough once they learn the reason why (appearance changed due to illness). Mostly I stick to my experiences and observations anyway without claiming to be some kind of expert. Even have to stress sometimes that my experiences are way outside the norm. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/02/22 12:36 PM |
| 69 | How many dudes in here are actually in a relationship?Can't believe there are no "no's" yet so I'll be the first. Not RP, and I'm too much of an outlier to have a term define me. Not to mention too old lol. Let's say grey pilled (i.e. I'm single almost exclusively due to my looks, so black pill makes sense, but still hopeful rather than giving up / getting hateful so we can lighten it a bit) | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/02/22 12:22 PM |
| 2 | Why are both players & Incels so vilified?It is grim, and utterly devastating. I meet the technical requirements of an incel but not the mentality, and my life has been basically a textbook case of the damage these lies can do - massive depression because of the constant abuse and dehumanisation. The other poster has got things pretty accurate. As a young guy you are told repeatedly that women don't care about how you look, and that if you are kind / caring, hard working, develop a good personality and have a good career etc. then you w… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 11:32 PM |
| 1 | Why are both players & Incels so vilified?It's the funny thing about how people struggle to follow cause and effect. Women: abuse and attack "ugly" men for years or even decades Some ugly men: become incels and return some of the hate Women: surprised pikachu face | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/02/22 10:45 PM |
| 2 | What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship?It's worth a try. Illness means I'm high risk of covid but even I'm getting a bit antsy always being at home. My fear would be that I've regressed personality wise and find it hard to connect with people (plus I am partly deaf) but I give most things a try. Even tried professional matchmaking and they felt so sorry for me / appalled by my story I got a massive discount. They tried to give me money back too when after 18 months they hadn't come close to finding anyone willing to talk to me. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/02/22 08:06 AM |
| 1 | What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship?Like most lonely guys I have pretty low standards, but you're definitely right in that the second I do express them I'm jumped all over as entitled etc. And the funny thing is that I'm not even asking for anything I don't do myself i.e. the literal cliche of don't be obese and treat me like a human being. And aside from looks (where I say I look "different" rather than "hideously ugly") it's not like I've got nothing to offer - 6 figure job in my country (probably just under in USD) even after m… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/02/22 08:01 AM |
| 4 | What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship?No worries. If I had all the answers I wouldn't be here haha. The one thing I've heard said a lot is the just world fallacy, where people don't want to admit that terrible things happen to otherwise good people, so they feel more comfortable with an explanation that puts the blame on the complainer. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/02/22 03:17 AM |
| 8 | What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship?I've had more time than most to think about things, but I don't really devote a lot of time to it. I'd say part of it is that there are a few who did do things like that, and they tend to be the most visible, particularly on the internet. The neckbeard stereotype does exist for a reason. More generally, it's just that people focus on the now than the past, and that they literally don't see all the times we tried etc. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/02/22 03:00 AM |
| 7 | What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship?Oh, thank you! I'm sorry to hear about that though. It's hard being empathetic / emotional at times as there's so many different things that are just objectively terrible. I've always maintained that this side of things has been much harder to deal with than the physical side of being sick (although that was pretty unpleasant). Things are Ok these days, aside from dating everything is fine although I'm a few years behind most people financially etc. I have good periods and bad periods on the dat… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/02/22 02:42 AM |
| 129 | What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship?The way I look is the big one (illness affected appearance), can't get a relationship when you can't even get your foot in the door to be seen as a possible dating option. As the years have gone by the damage from the abuse and missing out on the experiences "normal" looking people take for granted has just made things harder. A lot of people here seem to have this bizarre reversal of cause and effect - e.g. they think that "ugly" guys locked themselves away immediately as teenagers and never ev… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/02/22 11:03 PM |
| 3 | Standards are not a sacred covenant.There is one, for men in the US at least: https://igotstandardsbro.com/ | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/02/22 09:04 AM |
| 2 | Modern women are becoming more openly and gratuitously cruel and spiteful to unattractive men.I've had similar personal experiences to the OP in the past (up to being assaulted or told to kill myself because of how I look), happens less now I'm older and not 'out there' as much, but I don't think I've noticed any particular increase in frequency generally. Probably because I barely use social media. From what I can see IRL and from reports here and elsewhere the threshold for being subject to this kind of treatment is lowering - i.e. my looks were / are very much an outlier being affecte… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/02/22 12:47 AM |
| 1 | Women who think men don’t look at them as “people” misunderstand male sexual attractionDenial of subjectivity – treating the person as though there is no need for concern for their experiences or feelings Reduction to appearance – the treatment of a person primarily in terms of how they look, or how they appear to the senses Silencing – the treatment of a person as if they are silent, lacking the capacity to speak These three are primarily how physically unattractive or different looking men are treated. Experiences belittled and ignored. Being dismissed as not worthy of basic hum… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/02/22 11:51 PM |
| 2 | What are your OSRI (Open Sex-Role Inventory) results? Are you more fem? More masc? Non-binary? Androgynous?90 for both and undifferentiated (36m). Not overly surprised! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/02/22 03:14 AM |
| 3 | Blue pill advise does not help men whatsoeverI'm hardly an expert, but been around here long enough to get the gist of them. Have also seen first hand how almost everything you're taught about being a good person etc., being confident and funny etc. means nothing if you're simply not even recognised as a possible dating option. I started off "normal" enough (except for looks) and I tried again and again etc. It just wears you down, particularly with no positive feedback ever. Still have hope of finding someone who basically needs to be an … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/02/22 02:54 AM |
| 10 | Blue pill advise does not help men whatsoeverThe blue pill advice is incredibly damaging for less attractive men - it basically guarantees that you'll remain forever single. As one of so many guys raised with bog standard blue pill advice my own experiences essentially prove how wrong it is. Red pill can help (i.e. it is useful beyond just dating), but overall I'd say I'm grey pillled (black pill with a shading of hope). You're told all your life that women don't care as much about looks, that you won't have any trouble finding someone who… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/02/22 12:07 AM |
| 7 | Does anyone know why there's a disconnect between OLD apps and real-life couples?I'm shocked more people don't realise this. Also, basic logic should tell them that the amazingly hot dude on OLD is not there because he genuinely can't find anyone, it's most likely that he has a shit personality or is a giant douche. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/01/22 11:08 PM |
| 1 | Can The Era of Men ever truly die?Would it be better if I claimed the time of the emu has come lol | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/22 12:08 PM |
| 10 | Can The Era of Men ever truly die?The age of men is over. The time of the orc has come. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/22 11:23 AM |
| – | 80% of women are also invisible to meNot always of course, but I think I can speak with some authority on appearance being affected by genetics etc. as a sufferer of severe illness which has affected my appearance. However, it is a choice in the overwhelming majority of cases - illnesses which affect weight control etc. are almost as rare as mine - which is 1 in several hundred thousand. I'm mostly confused about where you're getting this "I think my opinion must be catered to" bit from? I just answered the OP question / comment ab… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/01/22 10:39 AM |
| – | 80% of women are also invisible to meHow could you possibly be confused lol It's pretty obvious I mean it's their choice to be obese. They choose to live that way. They choose to do nothing about it for the many years it takes to reach that point. I see no problem in judging people on their actions. Do you? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/01/22 10:08 AM |
| – | 80% of women are also invisible to meI wouldn't go that high, i.e. obesity rates are nowhere near that level, but yeah probably around 30% just wouldn't register as an option. That's their choice though. If they wanted to be seen as more attractive by a greater number of people the solution is pretty obvious. For others, they don't have that choice. For example there's nothing I can do to alter the visible symptoms of my illness (and I've certainly tried multiple times). What is objectionable is that society deems it perfectly acce… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/01/22 09:45 AM |
| 53 | New article finds that apps like Bumble have women feeling dismissed and dejectedI'd argue it's still different. These women are still getting at least some level of acknowledgement and validation as in most cases the man has considered them physically attractive enough at first glance to possibly give a chance to. What's more, as we all know it is more likely the more physically attractive men that are exhibiting this kind of behaviour (simply by recognising that they will be the ones these women are choosing to "like"). In comparison, as a man generally considered physical… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/01/22 09:01 AM |
| 1 | Daily Community Chat MegathreadIt sounds Australian to me. Source - am Australian | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/01/22 11:13 AM |
| 7 | Hinge experiment analysis. Are men on dating apps really as bad as what women describe?It's worse than that - there's literally an option to make your account invisible but able to message matches (i.e. so you stop getting new likes). It takes like a second. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/01/22 01:29 PM |
| 13 | If dating was a subject/unit what grade would you give yourself?This was my first thought. "You have failed the physical attractiveness prerequisites to be enrolled" | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/01/22 10:03 PM |
| 2 | Men misunderstand the 80/20 rule, and how it applies how men view women aswell.Prepare to lose your arm and your leg lol, I can easily say that I desire at least 50% of women within my age range. I believe most men can say the same - we have a much lower attraction threshold. The general difference is that men tend to be much more accepting of different types of appearance and will actively look for a positive characteristic. On the other hand it seems that women will actively look for a single disqualifying characteristic. I can't speak for the experience of the average l… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/01/22 10:32 PM |
| 3 | Can I ask about your dating life so far? What's your goal and have you been successful achieving it?Non-existent. My goal may have changed over time (e.g. from typical horny teenage guy happy to get anything to desiring a long-term relationship and not being into hookups as I got older and my personality adjusted) yet I've consistently had terrible / no experiences. I've commented reasonably frequently about having an appearance significantly affected by illness and how that's meant I'm not even recognised as a potential dating option and regularly abused for how I look. So practically you cou… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/01/22 12:30 AM |
| 1 | Why don't you make a dating profile of an average man?That's alright man, we don't always write the best hey. I still have hope and know there are good women out there, unfortunately the reality is that I'm 35 with no dating experience so it's very hard to find them. If it happens great yet I'm pretty comfortable (if poor lol) with remaining single. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/01/22 08:38 AM |
| 3 | Why don't you make a dating profile of an average man?I'm sorry, I know you're trying to be helpful, but you don't know anywhere near enough about my life to make this pretty offensive comment. I have a serious illness that destroyed my appearance as a teenager. When I say I've only ever experienced being deliberately ignored or being on the receiving end of hateful abuse and literal assault it's simply a factual statement. I'm aware I'm a huge outlier but that makes it no less frustrating when you're blamed (as you are doing here) for things beyon… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/01/22 08:29 AM |
| 2 | Why don't you make a dating profile of an average man?Thank you! It's sadly a very common occurrence for less physically attractive young men and very few people care. The usual jump is straight to blaming the guy without hearing the back story. I'm running out of time (already 35) but things are ok these days - you come to terms with the loneliness although unlike most I haven't given up completely. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/01/22 02:27 AM |
| 3 | Why don't you make a dating profile of an average man?Honest answer - aside from never even having anything close to that opportunity (my experience literally involves being abused and even assaulted for my illness affected appearance) if you took out overweight there would be a serious consideration. I personally find most very attractive people to be boring as batshit - and they'd find me the same. I'm not interested in casual sex (maybe I could've been with a different life). My frustration is that I've only ever been treated as some kind of sub… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/01/22 01:44 AM |
| 10 | Why don't you make a dating profile of an average man?That's not even a close analogy - it's more like a MacDonald's girl demanding a Michelin starred man. The 5 star restaurant is booked out and instead of even treating the 3 star restaurant as an option, you act like anything other than the five star must be one. At least you admit that you only judge on a single criteria, it's better than the lies we're usually fed. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/01/22 01:24 AM |
| 14 | Why don't you make a dating profile of an average man?Lmao, you don't have standards, you have hateful attitudes towards men based on physical characteristics they can't change. Besides, the second an "ugly" man has even the most minimal standards such as don't be obese you jump up and down and scream about male entitlement and fat phobia. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/01/22 01:16 AM |
| 3 | Why do incels enrage woman so much? Aren’t they literally doing what they wanted? Who gives a fuck if they hate woman if they don’t get dates in the first place?He must be young lol | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/01/22 06:40 AM |
| 11 | Does TRP actually UNDER estimate just how much looks matter?And the reverse is also true - it is very difficult to be confident if you never receive validation (and indeed are regularly ignored or insulted etc.) because of your looks. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/12/21 09:01 PM |
| 36 | Doesn't the existence of lesbians completely destroy a lot of red pill views of how women view men?I've heard the opposite pretty regularly on here - that most women's appearance standards like make up and expensive clothing are self imposed. I'm not exactly a full on redpiller but I would tend to agree i.e. I don't really care a lot about how a woman dresses beyond basic pride in your appearance (and it's not like it's my business anyway). Same with make-up, I hate the layered on look and prefer a more natural appearance (although I have heard that men are hopeless at recognising a real natu… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/12/21 07:19 AM |
| 1 | Do you have female friends?I'd say most of mine have either fallen away or are now in relationships with my male friends. I had the stereotype big friend group in uni and over time many paired up or drifted away (e.g. they met partners or moved cities). These days I have female colleagues etc. but I don't go out of my way to hang out with them (or male colleagues either) outside work. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/12/21 10:33 AM |
| 7 | It has never been easier to dateI mean this is just flat out wrong and incredibly offensive to those of us with "different" appearances (affected by illness for example in my case). Go on, tell me how it's my fault that I've only ever been ignored, abused, or literally assaulted because of how I look. I suspect a severe empathy deficit on your part. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/12/21 12:31 AM |
| 4 | Being " used for sex " is much better than being a virgin and not being used at all.I can see how that really sucks and was obviously painful for years, but I'd like to offer my experiences as a counter (without judging / trying to dismiss your feelings). It sounds like while things for you ultimately ended up terribly, you still had the experience of being wanted and at least some level of emotional connection (again, obviously not good that it was fake on his part). The other thing is that this "only" lasted four years, i.e. eventually you were able to find someone who offere… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/12/21 10:32 PM |
| 6 | Women who claim there are no good men on dating apps or that all men want on there is sex are showing that they are low value.This is the thing that infuriates me the most as a lonely guy. My appearance is affected by my illness, there is literally nothing I can do to improve it beyond what I already have (with the exception of being slightly overweight due to lockdowns). My only experience in dating has usually been just to be ignored / dismissed as an option on sight, or abused for how I look. Yet, I have some basic standards (nothing I don't expect of myself) regarding the things you mention (weight tattoos etc) and… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/12/21 10:24 PM |
| 1 | PPD: When did you lose your Virginity?No regrets. I may do it more in the future (just twice so far), depends on how things turn out in dating and how I want to spend my money. It's legal here but not the cheapest, and in my limited experience you do get what you pay for. Covid putting an obvious damper on things too. I'd say no. It is fairly clearly transactional (although part of that may be me being too shy to clarify all I wanted i.e. the impression of being wanted etc). You know that it's not "the real thing" if you get what I … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/12/21 03:19 AM |
| 4 | PPD: When did you lose your Virginity?35M, when I was 34 I decided to see an escort. It really just reaffirmed my feeling that it's probably a lot better with someone who likes you. My looks are becoming less of a wild outlier now so I'm still hopeful it'll happen "properly" but even then it will likely be a challenge to find someone understanding enough. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/12/21 03:44 AM |
| 10 | Cold approaching is seen as shallow and objectifying, but how is Tinder any better?Yeah, anyone can come off creepy. I think the big difference is that for the ugly guy the default assumption (before he says / does anything) is that he's creepy. The hot guy is given the chance, the opportunity to approach isn't closed off, he may still be considered creepy but it's based on what he says / does rather than how he looks. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/12/21 10:28 PM |
| 105 | I prefer muscular or athletic menExcept herpes. That shit stays with you. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 11/12/21 01:31 AM |
| 7 | If she loves you more than Dunkin Donuts, she's a keeper. PS: No games.Is it even possible for her to love something more than she loves donuts? | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 10/12/21 01:34 AM |
| 7 | Gave you ever pulled the "fake date" joke on a girl? How familiar are you with this trend? It seeks to have happened to a lot of us women based on the thread earlier...The trope is that it happens a lot to the ugly / nerdy guy too, but maybe I'm just showing my age lol E.g. the beautiful / popular girl acts all interested in the guy and flirts with him a little and then it either goes two ways: a) he takes the bait and gets publically humiliated then and there on asking her out, or b) he doesn't react / take a leap and the mocking is minimised and behind his back. Pretty sure I managed the second once or twice in high school - I was just far too cynical to bel… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/12/21 07:43 AM |
| 1 | Devils Advocate: Is 6 figure, 6 pack, 6 feet really to much to ask in 2021?I think it takes guys some experience and time to learn this, and if you're considered ugly when young it just takes longer to learn (i.e. you rarely get the opportunity to see this in action). There's also the social stigma for ugly guys who have standards - I mean I've seen it so often that short guys, bald guys, and ugly guys etc. get labelled entitled or misogynistic etc. just for saying they wouldn't consider an obese woman. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/12/21 08:08 AM |
| 1 | Single but god fearing mother of 2 fishing for Chad on Tinder. She is beautiful and has a nice smile. Anyone willing to commit?Nice smile? Maybe the emoji is literal - "nice" round face | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 02/12/21 11:59 AM |
| 5 | If average men have such a hard time getting in relationships, why do men cheat far more than women?Or Pierre ze Pool Boy | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/12/21 04:42 AM |
| 3 | If average men have such a hard time getting in relationships, why do men cheat far more than women?Or laid by Bill the Bricklayer | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/12/21 04:28 AM |
| 17 | The number of men not having sex within the past year tripled between 2008 and 2018. Why is that?I've found there's a gap at the opposite end too - i.e. the most physically attractive women can be nice to me because they don't even perceive me as a dating / hookup possibility. It's generally the less attractive ones who are the most vicious in their treatment - because they think I might see a chance and they must aggressively stop any such hope. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/11/21 03:09 AM |
| 2 | What height is too short for a guy? Anything below 6'4". Meanwhile, she looks like this.Yeah, I thought it was just me, being objectively below average, who really struggled, but the experiences of average dudes and how it sucks for them too reminds me even more that I was never the problem. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 07/11/21 08:41 AM |
| 22 | "Why do Men who are in my league approach me and Not Mega hot Millionaire Chad? 😱" wonders 35+ postwall Carol. It's natural for poorer people to be interested in buying cheaper products, that's why. You can't be a run down & used SUV and expect Rich guys to buy you.That can be in 'Forever 31' | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 25/10/21 10:47 PM |
| 2 | Emotional intelligence is the most important part of being attractiveOne problem is that it is increasingly rare for women to take that time, or maybe that's just my experience as a "different" looking guy - i.e. it is extremely rare that you get a chance to show anything about yourself if you fail that initial looks test. Because these days theres a guy who passes it a swipe away - even if you meet in real life there's no patience or development of physical attraction - one look and you can be done as a possible option. And then, for a guy considered to be on th… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/10/21 01:20 PM |
| 1 | "I am.... inevitable."Was it the Scottish? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/10/21 08:31 AM |
| 5 | Women have it easier in pretty much all aspects of lifeAnd it's so bad that just by treating a person humanely and having a conversation with them (even though you're not interested in them in any way and aren't flirting) will have them convinced that you are into them just because you are giving them the time of day. I feel this. It's so hard to stop doing it too. It literally makes my week to have a basic conversation with someone I don't know who is nice to me, after so many other interactions are characterised by contempt. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/10/21 09:08 AM |
| 8 | Women have it easier in pretty much all aspects of lifePlus a chunk of your taxes, although that's less a gender thing but more a selfishness / entitlement thing. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/10/21 09:03 AM |
| 2 | Older virgin women, why are you still virgins?My thought would be to try to find a guy in a similar position. For example (and not suggesting myself lol) I'm in that position and I would absolutely love to find someone similarly inexperienced as me, or at the very least understanding about it. But it does get in your head a bit e.g. when do you bring it up? I always worry about mentioning it too early might mean they're scared off, and not saying anything means they could lose interest as nothing physical is happening. If I can get to a pos… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/09/21 11:33 PM |
| 9 | Average men in long term relationships critiquing people who are single.I think the answer is simpler - it's just ignorance. However much he may see and hear about the reality, and the difficulties faced by so many guys, having never experienced it he might struggle to comprehend. It's not too surprising, a lot of people have no idea what it feels like. From his perspective, he tried once, maybe a few times, and found a girl he considers attractive (he won't see her as below average), and the desire to feel superior drives the opinion that other guys who can't get w… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/09/21 12:36 PM |
| 14 | How long *should* it take someone mid-20’s actively trying to get a relationship?Yep. Realistically it might be 3-6 months if you follow rules 1 and 2. For those of us who literally can't, it could take years or perhaps like in your and my experience so far, a lifetime. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/09/21 09:46 AM |
| 1 | [Q4W]Do believe average looking women get a lot of attention?I've missed the boat on a quick reply but this is definitely the case. As a guy who looks / looked different my treatment while being rejected (or even just trying to talk) in real life was often unbelievably brutal and humiliating. So much so that I consciously avoid being possibly seen as doing so. While some responses in online dating can be just as bad (being insulted, told to give up or to k1ll yourself etc) the fact that it's not in person makes it far easier to deal with. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/09/21 11:50 PM |
| 11 | Definition of a fat woman?Can't speak for all of us guys (and I'm probably not the most representative - having literally never dated), but there's probably two big points I think: a) guys like a whole range of different looks - e.g. while I might say I'm into the very skinny look, that doesn't mean I won't even consider different body shapes etc. b) the "cut-off" point is also different for each guy, and for most of us is probably bigger than you'd think! Having said that, I could be pretty unique? I mean, I get constan… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/09/21 10:26 AM |
| 3 | Is a balding man equivalent to an obese female in thr dating hierarchy?Probably because I kind of had bigger problems! That, and because of those bigger problems, I have no money. I don't think look particularly good either. Without remembering how I thought all the way through I'd say it just never really crossed my mind? I was probably naive and believed all that stuff about how there would be people who didn't care etc. Guess I found out better. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/09/21 10:56 AM |
| 6 | Is a balding man equivalent to an obese female in thr dating hierarchy?No worries (although you would note where the picture is posted!), it started at 16, and was gone / as now by 21, far too early for male pattern I would say. Having said that, I think the illness simply accelerated what would've happened eventually anyway. I tried all the medications etc. that are supposed to help with male pattern when I was 18 and nothing had any effect. To expand on my comments, the other thing I would note is that obese women definitely considered themselves to be above me l… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/09/21 10:35 AM |
| 12 | Is a balding man equivalent to an obese female in thr dating hierarchy?My experiences would tell me they're at least equivalent, although as a guy who went bald due to illness at 16 I can tell you it is much more socially acceptable to insult the bald young guy (despite the fact he can't change it) than it is to even mention the fact someone is obese (even though this is ordinarily, but not always, the result of their choices). That is, life as a young bald guy is significantly worse than for the obese woman as generally there is no way to change, and broadly peopl… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/09/21 10:24 AM |
| 1 | What do you consider to be "realistic standards" for your gender?Damn, I'm a millennial guy and it sounds like I should've been born 10 years earlier lol, those GenX women's standards are almost made for me. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/09/21 09:19 AM |
| 13 | Land whale must think shes a 10 with expectations like thisMore if she sits on a few | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 31/08/21 02:32 AM |
| 2 | Late 30s career-oriented womyn sues dating agency after they are unable to procure six foot tall man who meets her list of criteriaI'm not entirely sure. Median is about 55k and I think the average hovers around 80k (although I don't really check / care). Maybe 100k US is probably the most accurate. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 30/08/21 09:46 AM |
| 14 | Late 30s career-oriented womyn sues dating agency after they are unable to procure six foot tall man who meets her list of criteriaHaha, nope you get guys like me! I'm Australian and have tried one of these services as a guy (technically I'm probably still a member as they failed to find a single woman who was willing to talk to me - and my only criteria was literally not fat!). Ironically, I would meet all her demands (I scrape 6 foot and earn over $100k) but would've been filtered out (read straight up ignored) for my looks - and even sadder is the fact that I'm at least her looksmatch if not better - see my recent post. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 30/08/21 04:10 AM |
| 30 | Late 30s career-oriented womyn sues dating agency after they are unable to procure six foot tall man who meets her list of criteriaThis isn't the first time this particular agency has been sued either. I live in Australia and there was a previous case they lost for not being able to find a guy meeting the criteria. It was a consumer law issue in that they'd essentially "promised" to cpme up with a guy meeting the criteria. I assume they've learned from that and made no firm indication that any guy would be found. The hilarious thing is the entitlement of these women though. I mean as someone utterly desperate due to an illn… | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 30/08/21 04:02 AM |
| 3 | Does effort in dating build value or reveal value?You're asking the wrong guy lol - I'm in the bottom 25% of looks but (at least) top 25% intelligence and I haven't even found an answer to being ignored on sight / never being given a chance. Realistically, not much. Maximising what they can (i.e. being well-groomed etc., trying to learn what they can, having active interests). My point is that it's never going to be easy, and there are some people who are going to be unlucky (none of that "there's someone for everyone" crap). Accepting reality … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/08/21 06:44 AM |
| 1 | Does effort in dating build value or reveal value?I'd say it's a mixture between the second and the third, but I wouldn't go so far as to say it's hopeless for anyone - i.e. there is definite inequality in how people are valued (and that in itself is problematic in the way it is done), but effort can help. For example, there are plenty of people considered inherently (and often unfairly) as being low value e.g. this often seems to be primarily on looks. They can improve their prospects to an extent by improving themselves but they'll never have… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/08/21 04:30 AM |
| 1 | I feel like its messed how people get judge for their looks.That's really similar to what happened to me (lost my hair at 16). It's sad how it's just commonplace and acceptable. I mean I tried to laugh a lot of it off, especially while I was still at high school but when it comes from people who were friends it is really hurtful. I shudder to think how much worse it would have been if I wasn't at an all boys school. The double standard is just shocking, isn't it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/08/21 11:07 AM |
| 3 | I feel like its messed how people get judge for their looks.Yep, work and just socialising in general are harder as you're usually looked down on. The saddest thing is that now it's considered not OK to criticise people's choices (e.g. being overweight, having tattoos, piercing etc.) which do say something at least about personality, while if you've got things that can't be changed no one gives a shit about abusing you for them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/08/21 10:38 AM |
| 2 | I feel like its messed how people get judge for their looks.Yeah, I never had it that bad. For me, the worst part is that all the crap is based on things I can't change, things that are literally symptoms of my illness (I've got a kidney problem), and that there is never any attempt at empathy or understanding. The being sick part is really easy compared to how people treat me (and I've had multiple organ transplants!). | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/08/21 10:34 AM |
| 11 | I feel like its messed how people get judge for their looks.I would say it doesn't stop, it just becomes less overt. For example in my teens and twenties I was frequently called ugly, told to k1 ll myself on occasion, literally assaulted, and shouted at / insulted etc. based on my looks alone. That doesn't happen anymore in my thirties, but the disgusted looks, being deliberately ignored, snide comments etc. still happen. It's often the subtle things that can be more damaging, e.g. if someone is openly and aggressively targeting the ugly dude then people… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/08/21 04:42 AM |
| 3 | Chubby with demands. Must be 5’11It should honestly be take off (at least) 3 inches, $30k, etc. whatever the demand is, per kid / per 10kg overweight | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 20/08/21 08:50 AM |
| 20 | Virgins at age 26: who are they?I was 34 ("gave in" and decided to see an escort), I think it is well under 1% by that stage. There was a graph on a now banned sub that showed an asymptotic curve which hit 1% around late 20's and then goes practically flat (e.g. it never gets to 0% but there isn't much downward movement. So, congrats, we're in the 1% (that no one wants to be in) | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/08/21 06:56 AM |
| 7 | How to spot an FDS kween on dating apps.As light snacks | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 19/08/21 02:04 PM |
| 19 | A few quick thoughts on the banning of two large manosphere subredditsWell, more "if it oinks like a pig, and waddles like a pig..." lol | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 04/08/21 01:00 AM |
| 8 | Line up boys! 33yo fat granny is looking for someone to step up and pay for her children!It's the new "curvy" - just want to say to them "you're round, not curvy, dammit" | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 03/08/21 10:51 PM |
| 1 | Q4all: education and income/ genders -- why is there a discrepancyHaha, that too. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/07/21 10:05 AM |
| 3 | Q4all: education and income/ genders -- why is there a discrepancyOr is there another obvious reason that people just don't want to admit to. The reason I can think of is the smarter, higher earning men are commonly considered less physically attractive - can't be found if you're existence is ignored! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/07/21 09:37 AM |
| 7 | Female Delusion CalculatorI put in mine = top 0.37% (if I was American lol) Not married 6 foot White Not obese $95k 4/5 bags of cat food In reality, I'm a guy who has basically never been on a real date because I'm ignored on sight. Next time anyone claims going bald young (teenager in my case) doesn't hurt your dating life - call out their bullshit - ha | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 31/07/21 04:40 AM |
| 1 | Is baldness a dealbreaker for most young women (in a young man 18-24) or can they still be genuinely physically attractive overall?You live, you learn. I can't remember exactly what I was thinking etc. - we're talking 15 or so years ago. I'm 35 now and by any measure I'd think we're talking completely gone for at least 10. I'm pretty much ok with things - I mean it's frustrating but like my illness you learn to accept things you can't change, my problem isn't lack of confidence now. I'm talking history here in relation to OP's question. All I really have in this area is some untested theories and some doctors comments. You … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/21 11:40 PM |
| 1 | Is baldness a dealbreaker for most young women (in a young man 18-24) or can they still be genuinely physically attractive overall?I tried a few things, I'm not exactly sure what was in them but nothing worked. I think it's because the hair loss isn't natural - i.e. the things the drugs are aimed at wasn't the reason mine was going | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/21 10:26 PM |
| 5 | Is baldness a dealbreaker for most young women (in a young man 18-24) or can they still be genuinely physically attractive overall?I get it’s not likely a preference but you really think it’s a total dealbreaker for the majority? At first - yes. Both in real life and online. I found that, at least until my late 20's (which was when I started online dating), real life was often worse - the abuse was much more immediate and visceral. But, the important thing is that this should change. To try to put it simply, if you've got high standards (and well you should, I agree with you there) the kind of woman you're looking for / con… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/21 02:02 PM |
| 1 | [Q4All]Are Ugly People Overrepresented online?In the online context I would say so. Both are going to get treated in much the same way. For example, if someone is gonna swipe left on looks it doesn't really matter with they think you're hideous or just not attractive enough, if that makes sense. What I was trying to say is that for guys, the experience of the average to below average (i.e. constant rejection etc which is clearly rarely based on personality) will leave them with the impression that they are uglier than they actually are. Fro… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/21 11:43 AM |
| 5 | [Q4All]Are Ugly People Overrepresented online?I think the distinction is that they may not be as ugly as they think, but that (for guys at least) they are perceived to be that ugly. We all know about the 80/20 data. Practically what this means is that outside the 20 you're likely going to struggle as a guy on OLD. This leads to your experiences being overwhelmingly negative - i.e. so few matches etc. Given looks are going to be the main judgement point, the logical conclusion is that you are ugly. However, I would think very few guys are le… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/21 05:25 AM |
| 16 | Is baldness a dealbreaker for most young women (in a young man 18-24) or can they still be genuinely physically attractive overall?As a guy who has been through this (I'm 35 and went bald due to illness at 16) I can guarantee you absolutely that it is seen as a deal breaker by most women that age and even older. Think about it this way, it's associated with aging, and young women who have hundreds or thousands of other potential options literally a second / swipe away will often dismiss you on sight alone - they'll assume you are a lot older. Many will in fact be abusive - I've experienced all types of insults even up to li… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/21 05:09 AM |
| 3 | Why are people defending the actions of this women in datingoverthirty?It has a massive overlap with FDS too. I can just see them gleefully supporting this treatment of a "scrote" | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/07/21 03:04 AM |
| 61 | Men dont respect womenYep, this also explains the absolutely vicious reaction ugly guys get when they dare approach. I've had everything from screamed abuse to literal assault for daring to be in the same location! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/07/21 11:29 AM |
| 7 | Australian pain in the ass thinks her success is the problem and not her shitty attitude (since when is having an obscure podcast considered successful??)Always has been. Pretty much all the worst elements of things like dating and celebrity culture have been imported here from the US etc. a looooong time ago. The level of idolisation of reality stars for exanple here is next level cringe. We have dating shows where "sophisticated" inner city women compete to "win the heart" of Chad Thundercock - Sheep Inseminator, with the prize of living on his farm. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 19/07/21 01:12 AM |
| 2 | Where are all the good men?This kind of thing is just depressing for me as a guy - according to those stats I'm in the top O.35%! Yet because of my looks I've never even been on a date or had anyone show any interest in me as a potential partner. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/07/21 09:29 AM |
| 2 | CMV: If you’re a man of average genetic physicality, you are equipped to attract romantic relationships and hookups.The implication being that if you fall below this threshold then it is much more difficult. I wonder why so many people have trouble accepting and acknowledging that? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/07/21 03:07 AM |
| – | Women do think physical attractiveness is important. It's just not impossibly high standards. Just don't be a neckbeard.This might be true for some (i.e. there's no denying the existence of your standard neckbeard) but there are others out there who get treated like shit because of our appearance and there's little we can do about it but hope the hateful attitudes ot many women change. I am all that and far more. Never been fat, always well groomed, have a nice, if understated style. Aside from looks I'm your "standard" highly educated professional with a range of interests and active pursuits. The kind of HVM th… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/07/21 02:26 PM |
| 3 | Woman don't consider overweight and obese woman to have as negative of a sexual marketplace value as men.Worse than that, it's an issue of accepting and even praising unattractive traits that can be changed / controlled while brutally mistreating others because of unchangeable physical characteristics. As a guy who went bald at 16 due to illness there are few things that piss me off more than seeing people whose dating struggles are largely their own fault being empathised with and supported while I cop abuse and calls to k1ll myself for daring to complain and have standards. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/07/21 10:44 AM |
| 1 | Women would be better people if they had to compete in dating like men doYeah, I wasn't having a go at you, but it's interesting you say physical attraction doesn't develop later - that's the opposite of what guys are told e.g. we're always told women don't judge guys on that alone when we all know that's what happens. My point was that you really can't describe your experiences etc. as hard when really everything was in your control and you had options / chances to be in relationships. My experiences were a bit extreme because that's just how people who look differe… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/07/21 04:42 AM |
| 2 | Women would be better people if they had to compete in dating like men doWhile I definitely got more attention online dating 10-15yrs ago, that attention didn’t lead to anything meaningful, just a string of disappointing relationships and downright terrible first dates. Yet you had that chance! Not only that, but you actively chose those men to go on terrible dates etc. with. The average man will rarely experience anything close to that. You had dates, relationships - I had abuse and being told to kill myself because of how I look. It really is worlds apart, what you… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/07/21 02:49 PM |
| 2 | Women would be better people if they had to compete in dating like men doWhile I definitely got more attention online dating 10-15yrs ago, that attention didn’t lead to anything meaningful, just a string of disappointing relationships and downright terrible first dates. Yet you had that chance! Not only that, but you actively chose those men to go on terrible dates etc. with. The average man will rarely experience anything close to that. You had dates, relationships - I had abuse and being told to kill myself because of how I look. It really is worlds apart, what you… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/07/21 02:49 PM |
| 26 | [Q4ALL]Do you believe average/below average people overstate how easy dating is for hot people in their gender?I think I can provide the counter experience of the below average dude! Nothing like that would ever happen, but the opposite does whenever I try to meet someone. For reference there isn't that much "wrong" with me - I'm in shape, 6 foot, high paying job etc. - I just happened to go bald as a teenager due to illness. The results in the dating world have not been pretty. As a snapshot: - I've been told to give up and k1ll myself - had people match with my on apps just to insult me and call me ugl… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/07/21 02:14 PM |
| 3 | If we accept that looks are the most important thing when it comes to attraction for both men and women, then why do we look down on plastic surgery?Get over yourself. Listen to the experiences of others instead of insulting them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/07/21 07:46 AM |
| 4 | If we accept that looks are the most important thing when it comes to attraction for both men and women, then why do we look down on plastic surgery?I don't know how anyone can honestly believe that at this point. I mean, sure there are outliers and exceptions but how can you ignore the thousands of examples that you come across constantly showing that this is not true??? If you don't pass the looks threshold, you're not even being seen as an option. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/07/21 07:44 AM |
| 2 | Height and social awkwardness are the two biggest impediments to a man’s dating life.Yeah, definitely not trying to claim I've got it worse. A lot of the options didn't work for me - e.g. I tried all the medications at 18. Hats just lead to abuse when you take it off. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/07/21 02:04 AM |
| 3 | Height and social awkwardness are the two biggest impediments to a man’s dating life.Fair enough, but the impact of how you're treated stays with you | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/07/21 02:00 AM |
| 2 | Height and social awkwardness are the two biggest impediments to a man’s dating life.Agree - I'd add losing hair young (like teens / early 20's) is as bad - no one wants to date the bald student. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/07/21 01:38 AM |
| 1 | Why is it taboo to admit you are not considered attractive by society?People don't like telling others they're unattractive physically or have a bad appearance because it makes the teller look horrible - i.e. saying "I don't want to date you because you're ugly" reveals the person doing the rejecting to be shallow etc. It's much better for their self-esteem (i.e. not yours or mine etc.) to believe they are a good person and that you have character flaws etc. The effect of this, is that when no-one admits it to you, you start to believe that you are a terrible pers… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/21 10:18 AM |
| 33 | Men who have higher standarts, are more attractiveYep, not to mention calling him entitled, and raving on about only wanting women out of his league. It's funny how women insist that they don't judge guys on appearance alone, yet the second an "ugly" guy has basic standards they'll go ballistic when he rejects them for failing to meet them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/21 10:55 PM |
| 5 | Having Standards is a Good ThingThe thing is though that a lot of what people call "standards" are actually not anything of the sort but rather being intolerant and judging others on things they can't control. No one is entitled to a date etc. and having standards is a good thing. You want a reasonably fit/healthy person, with good hygiene, isn't hateful etc. etc - fantastic - those are standards, things a large number of people can achieve with a little work, pride and self respect. But that isn't what women are doing (note: … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/06/21 09:46 AM |
| 3 | I think this should be here"I am pregnant at the moment but I don't let that stop me having fun" Oh, it will. It will. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 09/06/21 08:13 AM |
| 12 | Q4M: For men who believe your looks are the primary reason you struggle with women, please describe your physical looks?It's the reality for below average guys. I am really fed up with being told "bUt WoMeN cAn HavE StAnDaRdS" when what I'm being judged on is definitely not a standard. To give perspective, I've had multiple kidney transplants, and spent years (5+ all up) on dialysis. I consider that to have been easy compared to how I've been treated due to how my appearance was affected. Even the matchmaker has tried to give my money back to go away / give up after realising following 18 months of nothing but no… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/21 04:22 AM |
| 10 | Q4M: For men who believe your looks are the primary reason you struggle with women, please describe your physical looks?I'm 34. Just reach 6 ft, balding from 16 (due to illnes), other consequences include multiple surgical scars, sunken / waxy eye area, chronic fatigue, medication induced acne. Not fat. Very pale. I'd say 3.5 maybe - my lack of hair means I'm instantly 5 at most - average men my age don't look like 50 year old accountants like I do, and I've looked this way since around 21 at the latest. I don't just believe it's my looks, I've been told so again and again. For example I've got so much that women… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/21 04:14 AM |
| 3 | An attention whore exposing some skin and asking "do real men still exist"? Do real ladies still exist? Cause this is not it!I read this as Moss | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 08/06/21 11:54 PM |
| 3 | Just short of asking the big question😂🤡That's pretty much me as well - everything they claim they want but I went bald as a teenager due to illness, so not even seen as an option | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 29/05/21 06:08 AM |
| 60 | Just short of asking the big question😂🤡The answer she will get to her question there is basically "they must be hawt". If she hasn't fucked up her life by being obese etc. (questionable) and is still single in her 30's it is all because of her own choices. There are literally hundreds of thousands of average or below average guys in their 30's who would kill to meet a childless, human weight, basically normal woman. By rejecting them all to pursue Chad she'll end up being eaten by her cats. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 27/05/21 05:51 AM |
| 53 | Another young girl who "wants someone to grow with and reach goals with." Of course all of this comes AFTER she had Chad or Tyrone's kid. Now she's looking for you.My goal is not to be a step-dad. It's real easy to achieve on my own. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 25/05/21 12:11 PM |
| 3 | Saving myself for my future husband after 5 kidsYep, I'm well aware. We can only hope attitudes change, but posts like this show that the realisation for most women is coming far too late. I'm also not too hopeful that things will change in any meaningful timeframe for me - already mid thirties and the being ignored or abused is showing no signs of changing. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 17/05/21 04:01 AM |
| 4 | Saving myself for my future husband after 5 kidsAnd it conditions us to not have standards. I'm essentially a FA due to how I look, and the shock and hate expressed when I say I'll have nothing to do with the likes of this woman, or obese girls is unbelievable. As an "ugly" guy I'm just expected to be pathetically grateful with anything despite being a reasonably high value guy outside appearance. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 17/05/21 03:03 AM |
| 2 | I have a double chin get over itI'd say junior at the moment - simply because of a lack of time. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 16/05/21 09:15 AM |
| 12 | I have a double chin get over itThis is classic, isn't it. You must have this unchangeable quality that only a tiny minority of men have. But don't you dare say a thing about the fact I'm a future hambeast. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 16/05/21 08:38 AM |
| 16 | Chad didn't want her now she wants to be apart of YOUR future. You get her after Chad's done and now that she has a mom bod. She has a 7month old toddler and is currently getting divorced. No games or hook up over here. She just wants to chit chat and waste your time.Probably chad junior. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 13/05/21 12:25 PM |
| 2 | Who’s ready to treat this princess right because she’s tired of being treated like shit?An excellent coincidence - have my free one! | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 13/05/21 03:48 AM |
| 12 | Apparently she’s not into hooking upYep, and how many posts we see on here with single mothers refusing to even consider single dads. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 07/05/21 12:07 AM |
| 12 | And shes worried about red flags... while she’s holding a red flag Chad left her!Exactly, I fit the profile of that second guy to a T, mid thirties, solid professional job, never had a relationship due to being ignored on sight, going through the apps. For me, a woman having kids is basically an instant hard no. But so many out there will say yes, and even my own family looks at me like I'm crazy when I tell them it's a straight up deal breaker. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 04/05/21 10:36 PM |
| 7 | An eloquent message appealing for partnership from a 45-year old homemaker for your dignified perusalI award her no points | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 26/04/21 12:14 PM |
| 7 | Woman with 1000 cock stare wants you to PROVE there are good men leftYep, and she'll completely ignore them for chad etc. because of the tingles | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 23/04/21 07:36 AM |
| 3 | It's insulting to insinuate that our times equivalent to the cost of coffee. Perhaps less if they expect us to pay for our own.If you act like meeting me is a job, and expect to be paid for your time, I'm outta there quicker than you can say "don't judge me, I'm curvy" | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 21/04/21 10:22 PM |
| 3 | 22yo Single Mother ruled by her 2yo daughter’s impulses. Or maybe she’s blaming the kid for her poor choices in life?I assume most are from the US but seriously we could be talking about any western country these days | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 18/04/21 12:03 AM |
| 11 | Mompreneur??? Is this new?A new name for deliberately having kids to claim government benefits | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 17/04/21 06:35 AM |
| 5 | 28 [or 27 year old] hyperfertile trollop with 6, soon to be 7, anklehangers. Looking for marriage 7 kids too late. Must have a car to carry her growing clan about. [Resubmited to meet guidelines]Bloody hell, 7 already and still wanrs more. At this point she's a revolving door down there. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 16/04/21 01:51 PM |
| 89 | This 19yr old cashier single mom wants you to upgrade her lifestyle into an expensive one. She and her kid get all the thrills and you get all the bills.Thinking skills are always lacking. If she wanted that stable family country life why the hell would you let chad knock you up at 18? | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 16/04/21 11:21 AM |
| 8 | She got the bad boy she wanted. And now she's pregnant and broke and begging for food on ig.And usually in neck tattoo form | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 15/04/21 07:39 AM |
| 8 | “I want two boyfriends”But then what about second breakfast? | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 12/04/21 09:05 PM |
| 21 | When you have nothing to offer but still need to do the minimumHer ex's Netflix membership possibly? | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 10/04/21 12:44 PM |
| 3 | You’ll have to buy her attention just to be considered. Form an orderly line boysFree is overstating her value | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 09/04/21 10:34 PM |
| 1 | 21 year old, green haired, pregnant girl says you better like kids or you can just swipe left. Amazing sales pitch.Isn't that what her past chad "conquests" would have also said? | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 08/04/21 11:26 PM |
| 2 | Kermit didn't man-up so Miss Piggy had to buy her own ringI think it's even more counter-intuitive than that. As you say, many people will check to see if there are signs the other person is already in a relationship. Generally, the type of people who wouldn't are more likely to ne the douchebags they claim to be trying so hard to avoid. If you don't want to be treated terribly, why have markers that attract the kind of people most likely to treat you terribly? | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 08/04/21 03:59 AM |
| 3 | I'm in a complicated relationship but please send me at least $20And on behalf of Australia I'll say - NZ she's all yours | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 06/04/21 03:55 AM |
| 6 | If you can decipher the grammar, you just might have a shot with this "curvy" bipolar lady.He'd have to be a body builder to drag that much. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 04/04/21 02:09 AM |
| 3 | Good thing I’m a gamerAt least! | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 02/04/21 06:59 AM |
| 3 | “I just want everything and don’t even want to give him kids” cry countless post-wall single womenAll I read was "waaaaah, I just want someone who'll ignore all the terrible choices I've made and never want anything in return, waaaaah. Chad only tho" | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 31/03/21 03:01 AM |
| 22 | Gentleman are you a submissive man ready to get your hands on this 46yo that looks at the very definition of this sub and says "hold my Cosmo and watch this"? Then boys, have I got the woman for you (resubmitted. Forgot to black out her name)That's the real cock and ball torture right there | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 29/03/21 03:04 AM |
| 4 | serious shit only 😤And yet, you'll now be hit up every week / pay to subsidise her and the millions like her, sad lol | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 28/03/21 09:05 PM |
| 33 | What's your kids to age threshold?Funnily enough, women often speak of "real women", but simply as code for "morbidly obese" | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 26/03/21 09:26 AM |
| 6 | Poor guuuurl. 38F divorced for 10 years and just can't find love. Cystur feels like giving up. 😢Only until her many cats get hungry | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 24/03/21 05:04 AM |
| 7 | It's so hard being a drunk, fat single mom who $o want$ to $tart a traditional family 😢🎻And you can bet that if a compliment was forthcoming, she would have called him creepy. Can't win. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 22/03/21 07:57 AM |
| 47 | Anytime someone argues that average guys are trying to date models and need to lower their standards, just hit 'em with facts.And it adds up to 58% they wouldn't think about touching with a 10 foot pole. Man it sucks being in that group. | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 19/03/21 01:32 PM |
| 8 | "Hope you got your step daddy license". You can't make this crap up.A $tepchad! | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 16/03/21 09:35 PM |
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