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bluesfan16 Archive

View 0 posts and 103 comments by bluesfan16 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

I do still get fucking pissed off (ego is hurt) when I see she looks up the dick pic guy on the keylogger daily. She's had no communication with him, but still checks his Instagram daily. I feel like checking the keylogger and seeing this steals my focus and puts it back on her, perhaps I will just delete the keylogger now that I've seen she isn't fucking/communicating with him. Yeah, that’s a tough decision under the circumstance. I mean the fact that she's remained no contact so far and has ev…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/22 09:52 PM
1

So after all of the good advice you just received you decided to double down on scarcity and insecurity? Which you will quickly realize if she takes you up on your offer and actually tells you the complete truth. Man I really hope you return after your ban and let us know how this retarded experiment to try to force attraction by using ultimatums played out. I'm going to live my life on my terms. If she leaves she leaves. I'm feeling abundance. You might be feeling abundance but your hamstering …
/r/MarriedRedPill08/12/21 08:10 PM
1

Yeah I was wondering about you too. Being a committed multiyear MRP veteran who crawled through a river of shit and took back control of your life, I was hoping that you didn't hiatus because you got complacent like so many others seem to. So it's good to hear that life is going really well and you're still pushing the sled. Or maybe even starting to feel like you've reached the top of the hill. To the extent that's possible. Anyway, congrats on successfully unfucking yourself. Thats no small ac…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/12/21 08:13 PM
1

Things with plate are going well, moving towards exclusivity, she is pushing hard for it and doing some of the work. Still vetting through some red flags, I see plenty of enablers that she has surrounded herself with. All I can do is point some of these things out, as they say, you can lead a horse to water... A few set backs here and there, shit tests, comfort tests, shitty comfort tests. I still need to work dealing with this, maintain frame, and leading. Need to continue building out my own l…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/11/21 01:50 PM
2

secretly hope that the time turns things around before I fully pull the pin. Last month you were happier than you've ever been and had sub-zero fucks left to give so why do you hope that things will turn around? Is it because you still like her on some level and actually do give a fuck about losing her. Or does it have more to do with sentiment, perceived failure, sunken cost, the impact a divorce might have on your daughter, or something else unrelated to her as person or her role as your wife?…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/11/21 01:02 PM
1

I realized my wife has two power cards over me : one is to remove sex (but can she remove something that is non existant at this moment?) First of all she’s not removing it. You willingly surrendered it by making her your only option. And you haven’t been willing to take back ownership even though there could be other options besides her so stop deflecting the blame. the second is to remove herself (separation / divorce. I am now in peace with this second option. Really? At peace enough to test …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/11/21 11:59 AM
3

I also got "Let's divorce and just be friends to co-parent. I would take that offer an run if I were you because... "I want to explore other options and be with someone else." and "I'm bored, and this life (bedtime, dinner, dishes) just isn't for someone like me because I'm not wife material." You really need to listen to these guys because your wife has flat out told you what she wants (stimulation, excitement, experiencing other men) so you know what kind of behavior you can expect from her go…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/21 04:55 PM
1

I actually meant going forward, but whatever. No better time than the present to begin correcting your mistakes I guess. I only wanted to point that out because this is the first week that the Rule 9 moratorium was lifted and you haven’t been lurking very long. So if you’re not sure why that’s important, ackely1900 did a good job pointing out the overall benefit from these bans. The rule acts as a stick ex-post. But ex-ante, being mindful about it constantly redirects your focus away from anythi…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/21 05:58 PM
48

He was always special to me and I cannot imagine spending my life with anybody else but him. He has it all, he is a family guy, handsome, I am incredibly attracted to him, sex is the best, we share the same sense of humor, he is incredibly smart and strong. I flirted with my colleague for about a two months at work, seeking attention, having feelings for him. Those two statements don’t add up so maybe you were (and possibly still are) lying to yourself as well.
/r/RedPillWomen28/10/21 04:40 PM
1

My marriage has been great. For whatever reason, the pandemic and being together more strengthened our relationship. As I mentioned above, I encountered a couple of suttle red flags in my wife's behavior and communication. Her SMV increased over the past year, but so did mine so I am not too concerned about that at the moment as my MAP will help me continue increasing my SMV. Like I said, I have only been lurking MRP about 3 weeks, but I find myself a bit angry now that I have realized how bad m…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/21 03:48 PM
3

I need to will stop being such a pussy and find ways to get out in these types of situations more often. Some of my weaknesses are getting out and doing things I enjoy and just getting out of the house in general. I need to will improve on both. Bring up your comment history and ctrl+f "I need to". Assessment is necessary for identifying those weak areas but action is the only way you will achieve anything. So going forward, consider framing any awareness you have in terms of a commitment. Then …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/21 07:11 PM
1

I did do a day hike and spend an entire day working on the hobby car away from home, so I did have some progress this week on this aspect. Well that's a start. And I'm sure it feels insignificant in comparison to everything else you're dealing with at the moment but you should still include it in your OYS if you want to keep challenging yourself to do more things like that and hold yourself accountable like Grounded_spark suggested. Anything outside of "create a life outside of marriage" standou…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/21 11:49 PM
1

Ok dude after reading that “email” I’m fairly certain this is all bullshit. And if that’s the case then you need to grow the fuck up and stop wasting time with these daydream TRP incel fantasies. But at the outside chance it’s for real and you’re not just some bitter attention seeking reject then I’ll give my final opinion. If you dump this girl just because you think she’s an irredeemable skank because she got her titties sucked by a wannabe rockstar ephebophile when she was 15 then you are a f…
/r/askMRP21/10/21 08:08 PM
1

I get what your saying. No not really. Because if you understood the impact that cowering to your insecurities and fear will have on your life then you would have written a book length question asking what you need to do to avoid that instead of worrying about this girl. Everytime I ask a question these redpillers act so high and mighty asking oh you shouldn't care i didn't read that. This comment is completely irrelevant and something you actually shouldn't care about. I'm not scared to lose he…
/r/askMRP21/10/21 05:32 PM
1

Why not? You listed all these great things about her so what's the problem? I'll get you started with the answer. "Because I'm scared she is/will/could (insert fear you want to run away from instead of overcoming)."
/r/askMRP21/10/21 04:57 PM
3

As despicable as I was I'd expect it to take a long time for her to believe in me again. If one of the ancillary outcomes of fixing yourself is to have an enthusiastic first mate then believing in you is not as important as gaining a high level of attraction for you. I mean she can be genuinely impressed with the changes you made and trust that you now have a firm handle on the financial and logistical aspects of your marriage but that won’t translate to genuine desire if your still displaying u…
/r/askMRP21/10/21 04:49 PM
1

Was it just shit tests when she brought him up? Or something deeper? Who fucking knows. A better question to ask yourself is what kind of man you want to be. So if I were you I would put 100% of my focus and effort on trying to become a creator of alpha widows instead of worrying about whether or not you are a victim of one. That way you won’t need to waste what precious few minutes you have in this world accommodating your insecurities like you’re doing right now.
/r/askMRP21/10/21 03:33 PM
3

I'm more so curious as to why she would be so against my success even though she benefits. Probably because she knows she’s losing power and influence over your relationship which would make her pretty nervous. So that "you ain't shit" attitude would just be a manifestation of her solipsistic nature. Think about it. If the situation was reversed where you were still so-so or worse and your wife started getting in shape and becoming significantly more attractive and successful would you still be …
/r/askMRP21/10/21 03:08 PM
2

Am I sure I've got to do something differently/make some dramatic changes? YES Am I sure what the changes should be? NO Am I lost and grasping at straws? YES Seriously? Even though those same guys you trust have told you over and over what the changes should be? Like in your OYS a few weeks ago when you mentioned the importance of creating a life outside of your marriage but had no idea where to start. And you received the actionable advice of picking just one thing like camping and doing it, wh…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 11:54 PM
2

It's good you recognized this because you’re pissing in the wind if you expect the same kind of reciprocation from you kids. After a certain age, they just take and rarely give. So setting covert contracts with them is even more futile than it is with your GF because the relationship with your kids is primarily one sided by nature. Or at least until they reach another stage in life. Sure every once in a while they might tell you that you’re a good dad and they appreciate everything you’ve done f…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/21 05:16 PM
3

Why is she so focused on this thing with the work girl. In the context of your situation, the obvious answer is that she’s projecting. There was 3 months during our separation she didn't want to have sex at all. Or at least not with you anyway. I found new lingerie she bought during that time, and she told me she bought it for herself to feel sexy. That's the excuse she came up with? I mean maybe that’s a thing but I've never heard of any women who purchased lingerie just so they can look sexy f…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/10/21 08:41 PM
1

I'm just not feeling it. Maybe it's butthurt, maybe it's lack of attraction on my part. Maybe you finally began to question whether or not the juice is worth the squeeze and realized that on its own, it isn’t. Tell me if I'm wrong, but quite often it seems like your primary motivation here revolves more around achieving the vision of a relationship you desire than it does about your feelings for her. What I mean is, whenever you were confronted with your choice to stay you always seemed to be mo…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/09/21 08:49 PM
2

I did all I could do….If it's a pass/fail grade, mines we are going to be a fail, I doubt I'll ever be fully at peace with that. If you were still fumbling around on OYS 10 then sure, it’s entirely your fault because you didn't offer her the option to be with a high value man. But once you had made significant improvements and demonstrated a sustained willingness to become that man then it's her responsibility to begin managing the relationship. Or at the very least start making a fucking effort…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/09/21 01:44 PM
3

so I can revamp my wardrobe and catch my wife off guard to match the new style I want. That reads like there's still some covert contract/dancing monkey behavior going on so you will need to make a mindset adjustment if that's the case. It's a lot harder to be unaffected to not be negatively affected by her moods Sometimes I still let her little moods negatively affect me You should never be unaffected if someone you love is depressed and acting out so don’t make that your goal. If your wife bec…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/09/21 03:48 PM
3

“And then I realized... like I was shot... like I was shot with a diamond... a diamond bullet right through my forehead.” An honest self-assessment that is void of ego, the need for external validation, and with a desire to take responsibility for the entirety of your situation rather than trying to minimize, blame shift, or just running away. In other words, it sounds like you’ve decided to actually Own Your Shit. And if your main purpose going forward is to establish a strong frame and become …
/r/MarriedRedPill16/09/21 06:33 PM
3

Who are the quotes from? Horns OYS 36 I was kind of thinking this way. I don't want to fuddle around for years again, but letting things soak in for a week or two while I regroup is probably in order. At the very least it wouldn’t hurt to contact a lawyer so you can find out where you stand and prepare to have papers drawn up if you decide to go through with it. And also ask what all the do’s and don’ts are. But most importantly, follow the advice you get. getting "caught" (whatever that means) …
/r/MarriedRedPill15/09/21 11:04 PM
3

After nearly 2 years of OYS it's nice to see everything beginning to sink in and the seemingly endless cycle of chasing your tail in frustration might actually be coming to an end, so congratulations. That said you are throwing around words like “I’m done” and “Nuke” from a state of frustration, anger, confusion, and disappointment for the most part. So I would consider moving forward with cautious trepidation to keep everything from blowing up in your face. Because while your mindset finally se…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/09/21 09:11 PM
3

I want to must change this or I will never be able to achieve the kind of life I want. I'm assuming that you dealt with your alcoholism from a must quit mindset because of the severity of consequence you would be forced to face if you didn't address it. Whereas the negative impact of your porn addiction is far less consequential so it can remain in that want to quit mindset. But unfortunately that lack of necessity also makes your commitment level flexible and therefore easier to succumb to temp…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/09/21 02:30 PM
1

There was a lot of anger, which I had to learn how to let go of by forgiving her. Forgive her for what exactly? Taking the helm when it became clear that you had little to no interest in commanding your ship and transferred those responsibilities to her? Not adhering to the unspoken terms of your covert contracts? Not loving you or treating you in the adoring manner you thought you deserved after spending the last 2 decades doing nothing whatsoever to inspire that level of adoration? Or providin…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/09/21 06:35 PM
1

If it’s mostly about a lack of sex then this is probably the way to go under the circumstances. Your frustration and DNGAF finally hit a level where you actually summoned the courage to put your dick in another women. Coincidently, this was also around the time that your semi-frigid wife decided to fuck you 4 times in 10 days. But immediately after experiencing what OI and having other options (abundance) can do, you appear to have reverted back to your faithful hubby default mindset of false ho…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/09/21 08:46 PM
0

Texts asking to hang out and how she could go for a bowl (I don't smoke up, and wife had NEVER expressed interest in that to me). I didn't need to read anything RP to know the subtext here. I freaked out about it. So wife may be preemptively heading off concerns about a similar situation. Smoking weed isn’t something you need to be too concerned with since it’s relatively harmless. However, starting any out of character behaviors in her forties could indicate she is going through some sort of mi…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/07/21 05:03 PM
8

You might want to read this OYS reply that u/Oobertas made earlier today. That guy also has the same kind of probably happened but can’t prove it situation he’s trying to reconcile and his advice seems pretty solid under the circumstances.
/r/askMRP23/07/21 06:57 PM
4

My kids are 4 and 6, so they need constant attention. No they don't. They just need ways to channel all of their energy. Seriously, they are little kids so tell them to go play and don't bother her unless they fall out of a tree or something like our mom said to us. My sister and I always found plenty of ways to entertain ourselves while dad was at work and she juggled the responsibilities of house cleaning, laundry, meal prep, and watching gameshows. That "needs constant attention" comment kind…
/r/askMRP08/07/21 07:26 PM
1

That actually makes a lot of sense. While youth might be wasted on the young, the combination of impulsivity and a sense of immortality is not so having those restrictions probably saves quite a few lives. Or at least I know if I had been able to ride a sportbike on highways with no speed limit when I was 16 then there’s a good chance we wouldn’t be having this conversation. And that Aprilia looks like a smart choice for you. Just enough HP and torque to have some fun but not so much that you co…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/06/21 02:01 PM
1

Hell yes, about as often as I can. Do you already know how to ride or are you planning on taking some kind an instructional course? Or just buy the bike and learn as you go?
/r/MarriedRedPill25/06/21 12:55 PM
5

Fine, then cater to your emotions and tell her. Then prepare to be sucked back into her frame for another decade or two when she deploys self preservation (doesn't have to get her fat ass off the couch and get a job) by turning on the water works and starting up the "I'm sooooo sorry. It was a huge mistake and I promise it's over. I love you so much. Will you please forgive me." manipulation. Or who knows, maybe she wont give a shit and accelerate her original divorce timeline since you already …
/r/askMRP24/06/21 08:48 PM
6

They are planning on meeting up for a weekend soon. Good. What do you care? You're not even attracted to her. If you're lucky she'll branch swing right to him and you can get on with your life. How about i send her a text message at the airport on her way BACK telling her i know everything and want a divorce? Or, slip a note with screen shots of her texts to him in her suitcase? How about you beg, borrow, or steal enough money to get some basic legal help and then do exactly what they tell you. …
/r/askMRP24/06/21 08:30 PM
1

Fuck yes! (for the hundredth time) Probably not. That sucks but can you afford to not hire one?
/r/askMRP24/06/21 08:18 PM
10

Yeah I’m well aware of what she doing. You’ve been posting about it all week. And of course its overwhelming. But there is nothing you can do to change it. Just like there is nothing you can do to make her stop loving him and start loving you again. But somehow you still feel the strong urge to reward this betrayal by continuing to provide for her. While at the same time continue to punish yourself by remaining tied down to this unfaithful land whale that you're not even attracted to anymore. Se…
/r/askMRP24/06/21 08:15 PM
9

Maybe im just overwhelmed at finding all this out after so long with her. She (an obese woman who has been conducting an online affair with her highschool boyfriend. Been telling him she loves him while also discussing her plan to heartlessly blindside you with a divorce. And is now ready to meet him IRL using your fucking airline miles! so they can fuck) is in an affair fog. I know she will be devastated if i mention divorce. She doesnt work. Are you for real? Because this is some next level du…
/r/askMRP24/06/21 07:41 PM
1

Make it known you need him to man up and commit. I hate that phrase. Seriously, what does it even mean? Because to me the whole “man up and commit” sentiment is just another reflection of how BP conditioning has contributed to this “where have all the good men gone?" society that so many women seem frustrated with. I mean in this case what you basically told her is that this high earning HVM who is chasing excellence is not a real man unless he's willing to to divert from his purpose and commit …
/r/RedPillWomen24/06/21 04:56 PM
1

I have been thinking about getting my motorcycle license. I have been playing with the thought for 2 years now. Always thinking it's too dangerous. Starting to think more along the lines of 'fuck it, let's go'. And with my wrists getting better and me getting stronger I might actually approach this in august. Sportbike here I come. It certainly comes with risk but it could also end up being one of the best purchases you’ve ever made. There are quite a few benefits to owning a motorcycle, includi…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/06/21 03:08 PM
1

Stare at the abyss that is me being alone and left by my wife or leaving my wife and figure out how to be happy there. Figure out why I automatically assume that I’ll be alone in the abyss if she or I chooses to leave and fix it so I can be happy no matter what happens.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/06/21 06:49 PM
6

Yeah I cringed when I read that too. I mean that whole sexy outfit and boxers do you want to make love routine just sounds so void of passion it’s no wonder she wasn’t in the mood.
/r/askMRP11/06/21 10:33 PM
5

She gets into bed and gives a big yawn and I asked her if she wanted to make love. She answered with "We can if you want to." If your wife is saying “We can have sex if you want to” on her anniversary then it sounds like you’re not very good at getting her in the mood. Honestly, what you wrote kind of makes you sound like a boring old married couple. Whatever the cause you are clearly not inspiring her so you should probably start working on that instead of worrying about your dread strategy. An…
/r/askMRP11/06/21 07:50 PM
2

I read that estimate in an article a couple years ago and can’t find it doing a quick search. It might have been the NYT but I’m not sure about that either. Plus I think it was an informal survey they were referencing because, according to them, a formal study had not been done since the late 90’s or early oughts. I may look a little harder when I have some more time, but probably not since I don’t really care. If the research you found indicates 20/13 then it’s probably correct. I just remember…
/r/askTRP11/06/21 12:59 PM
1

I'm pretty sure all the 20% men and 13% women stats were taken from pre-smartphone studies. In the post app world marital infidelity estimates are closer to the 55-65% of men and 45-55% of women ranges. However that may also include EA's and remote yank and diddle affairs if you count that kind of stuff as cheating. Not sure what the PA numbers are now but it has to be a lot higher after the introduction of smartphone apps. But the better question OP should be asking himself is why he wants to g…
/r/askTRP10/06/21 04:44 PM
2

But 100%, I’ve never treated a girl like a fuck doll, let alone told her those exact things, and watch her melt even though I was objectifying the shit out of her. Was kind of weird at first and now I’m just telling her how she can please me and she continues to ask for more. I know it’s fucked up. It contradicts almost everything we were taught about how woman want to be treated. It turns out that it’s not about surrendering your will and pedestalizing her. It seems that when they see you as a …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/21 01:06 AM
2

shifted my attachment to be based upon my desired outcomes (have fun, fuck like I wanna fuck, do what I want, say what I want) rather than her offering me validation, emotional support, and all the other shit I used to turn to women for. Which resulted in her wanting to go on more trips with you so she apparently had fun, liked how you fucked her, enjoyed doing what you wanted and hearing what you had to say. It’s still funny to me how turned on most women are when guys have that subtle DNGAF co…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/06/21 05:48 PM
4

Character traits are something (for me) that you can’t teach like a skill. Integrity is something that you either have or you don’t. Nothing to do with ego or social constructs. When the going gets tough, do I bail because things are uncomfortable for two years? Or do I honor my words and try my best even though I know I will likely fail? That’s what it comes down to for me. My own personal concept of integrity is defined like that. Some might call me a beta bitch, some might say that’s the dumb…
/r/askMRP08/06/21 05:07 PM
2

Absolutely not. It just wouldn’t play out how you envision if it did happen. It’s way more complicated once that factor has been introduced into the relationship. But you’re right, men and women are not equal. And being submissive does not translate to being a doormat and you should never allow yourself to be treated as one if you are a high value woman. Furthermore, you should only be submissive to a HVM who has proven capable of leading and has earned your desire to submit. And disregarding yo…
/r/askTRP04/06/21 09:25 PM
1

Do you think my boundaries, especially #3, are reasonable? It's reasonable but not realistic if you are living together. Assuming he chooses to take an active parenting role then you’ll be interacting with his kid and the mom all the time. His kid will be at your house a minimum of one night a week and every other weekend so you will be taking on that responsibility too if you did want to remain supportive. So you will be way more likely to play the stepmom role than remaining an unattached thir…
/r/askTRP04/06/21 08:01 PM
2

It’s fucking crazy how so many posts are just a rinse and repeat by guys who keep chasing their tails in a desperate attempt to find some way to keep their BP dreams alive without adhering to the basic principles. I tip my hat to the vets who still have the patience and generosity to keep offering the same advice over and over. Especially knowing it will probably be ignored and you’ll be asked to repeat it when they come back crying after they’ve fucked everything up again. As for you /u/ZeGreat…
/r/askTRP03/06/21 07:53 PM
1

Look, the basic understanding of your assessment was accurate so I’ll clarify a little more. Yes, this was ultimately your fault for the simple fact that you are not a man who commands attraction or respect. And the cuckhold fantasy you encouraged certainly didn’t help. But that still doesn’t change what happened or absolve her from taking any responsibility. And what I said about dignity and self-respect will still apply even if you change and become that type of man. Which one of the reasons f…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/21 10:37 PM
2

OK well this reply isn’t going to be so nice but you need to hear it. There is truth and falsehoods in just about everything you stated. Here is what I mean. you should not tolerate it and move on with your life without her. That is true 95% of the time which is why your brain is telling you to do that. First of all you need to realize that you most likely got the trickle truth and don’t know how deep her infidelity goes. Did you catch her or did she confess? Because what she said (one guy a few…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/21 09:04 PM
1

I know it will. And I wasn’t trying to minimize the significance of what you’re going through right now. I know you have two little kids which complicates everything and requires patient and thorough consideration. It’s just that I’ve seen too many guys choose to run away or stick their head back in the sand of delusion when directly confronted with this kind of adversity. But reality and truth are what they are regardless of your feelings, desire, or shared history. And even though you can’t be…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/21 06:35 PM
4

You’re right, it was pretty obvious. And I’m sorry you have to go through it. That pan to the face way of forcing you to confront the reality of your failed marriage has to be one of the worst there is. However if there is anything to feel hopeful about, it‘s that many of the guys here have been through the same thing and come out of it much happier and lead more fulfilling lives. And I’m sure quite a few would be willing to offer their knowledge and support if you can demonstrate a sustained co…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/21 04:28 PM
1

In my head I see that wall as limiting how deep I'm willing to go into a connection. That wall provides a safety net when things sour and I'm able to rebound quickly. You’re right, it will. And you should keep your guard up until you gain more experience and shed all doubt that you are the prize. That said, it is possible to lower the height of the wall and allow yourself to feel deeper connections once you have internalized a different mindset. But that will require retraining your understandin…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/21 12:46 AM
3

I may not ever want to get married again, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to have deep and meaningful connections along the way. If I’m unable to have those my life will be significantly less enjoyable. I agree that establishing a strong connection can greatly enhance the experience, but that can be accomplished in a variety of manner depending on your mindset. So what does having a deep and meaningful connection currently entail in your mind and what are the requisites? For example, could it…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/21 04:38 PM
1

My concern is getting into a chicken match of not texting or who say good night or I love you first. I wonder is it childish of me to make such a drastic change in my text pattern. Is that being butt hurt of minor bullshit? Your concern shouldn't be chicken matches and whether or not it's childish. It whose frame you began operating in. Which in this case is pretty deep in hers. Think about your mindset here. It can’t even be a chicken match unless you’re already operating in her frame. On top o…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/21 07:35 PM
1

I didn't get a returned goodnight text and I was pissed as hell. Just consider that your penance for sending a goodnight text in the first place. As immature as these mind games may seem, by doing that kind of stuff you remove any possible competition anxiety benefit from living separately. Which she just demonstrated by not replying. Not only that but if you do it too often then you risk coming off as needy. Remember, she is the one responsible for managing the relationship. So all the ‘good mo…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/21 04:25 PM
1

Then I need to make cold calls (B2B). I am afraid of that. Building the website has been fun, I love coding. But the next step is a step outside my comfort zone. I sold life insurance for a couple years in my mid-twenties and the very first thing the GA told us in orientation was “My top agents average three appointments resulting in one sale for every ten calls they make. So being successful in this business means that you will still hear two ‘not right now’ and seven ‘I'm not interested and pl…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/21 03:27 PM
2

Yea so....got the plan covered. Already made dinner reservations for the best places in town (best, not most expensive mind you) with a spreadsheet full of beaches, activities, attractions, and breakfast/lunch options Damn, you are certainly prepared from a logistical aspect. Clearly wasted breath on my part. As one spreadsheet guy to another all I can say now is good job. Like you said, she has said she doesn’t want anything serious despite the fact that she said that because she was having a l…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/21 02:01 PM
1

She's overtly communicated she doesn't want anything serious...thinking this chick is some unicorn and getting all fucked up when she bounced, just like she said she would. If I interpreted that correctly, this woman has indirectly told you she’s just using you for laughs and sex until something better comes along or it stops being fun? If that’s the case then you are one lucky motherfucker. Considering where you currently are in your MRP journey (strong in understanding but vulnerable in implem…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/21 08:56 PM
3

Long distance is total bullshit That’s true if either of you wants an exclusive relationship. Under other circumstances it has some benefit. Like the relaxed OI from knowing it’s temporary. And if she is totally fine having a non-exclusive see-you-when-I-see-you drama free fling for a little while then it’s all upside if you can hold frame. I don’t know what I expect to happen after seeing her at the end of the month The good thing is it doesn’t really matter what happens because of your first s…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/21 08:28 PM
1

We have begun not talking and sleeping in different rooms from 8pm-7am my wife began working out late last year and has caught up/exceeded my SMV Her social life is better than mine and she easily gets validation from gym rats and random men in public. she went to the bathroom to look at her phone for 10 mins and get away from all of us She cried and said I ruin every holiday. It's not a sure sign she’s cheating but all of those are on the top ten list of red flags. Fighting with you all the tim…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/21 05:13 PM
1

I’m trying to learn how to maintain my seriousness and hard work toward life (because I believe in that as a long term strategy for success) while adopting the ability to be more fun and relatable socially, I guess is what I would say. It just feels like I have to fake so much to do that. You nailed it. That introspection comes through in your reply. And by being serious all the time, women will perceive you as boring and likely to add needy behavior and bullshit drama to a relationship. Which i…
/r/askTRP11/05/21 03:43 PM
1

I’m a tall attractive guy who lacks confidence within himself. I have trust issues with everybody...Honestly a dream for me would be isolated from the world living on a farm in the middle of nowhere. You should really do an honest evaluation (not clouded by your ego) and find out if your desire for isolation is congruent with how you're wired (extreme introvert) or because of fear. This is important because it's the difference between being true to yourself or just being a coward.
/r/askTRP10/05/21 04:00 PM
1

I’m not experienced with ONS so is this normal? It's the definition of a one night stand. If she gave you her info unsolicited then that would mean she's considering a possible FWB or GF situation. But she didn't so you were basically a live sex doll she used to quench a thirst. If it was really good (for her) and you don't demonstrate a lack of abundance by trying to contact her first then she might hit you up again if she's feeling Randy some night and wants a sure thing.
/r/askTRP10/05/21 03:40 PM
2

Finally got there after a long journey of questioning if this was right for me and realized I've been backsliding for too long while with her. Well no shit, it's about fucking time. Assuming you actually go through with it like you should have last week when you caught her lying about reading your journal. Or before that when you found out she was whoring on sugar daddy sites. Oh that's right, I'm sorry. She wasn't whoring. She was just "selling nudes". Yeah right, give me a fucking break. But I…
/r/askTRP07/05/21 09:46 PM
1

Christianity comes down to your acknowledgement that you are a sinner and have accepted Christ as your savior. That's it. So RedBackedBadger is absolutely correct, the rest of this shit doesn’t really matter. You can’t change how society behaves so you'll just need to decide what you want based on the reality of living in the 21st century. Which includes the understanding that half of marriages will end in divorce. And that a lot of the young women today will gladly share their fast-food pump an…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/21 01:06 AM
12

I read your posts recently and you are so far up your wife’s ass right now that you couldn’t pass her shit tests even if you recognized them. So take a deep breath slow the fuck down. The most effective thing you can do right now is focus only on the things you have complete understanding and control over. Which is why everyone keeps telling you to read, lift, and STFU. And since you’re still struggling to get a handle on what STFU even means then just focus on reading and lifting. Your wife has…
/r/askMRP30/04/21 09:37 PM
3

I think your list is pretty good. All of that should be your top priority right now. Doing whatever is within your ability to be as physically attractive as you can and get your mental health issues properly addressed. That one should probably be the biggest priority. Because, even if he isn't scared off by that and decides to marry you, if you’re a basket case all the time and constantly causing turmoil in your relationship then you can’t really be a good wife no matter how loving or accepting …
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/21 08:06 PM
2

The most important part of the vetting process is patience. Take plenty of time and really get to know them before you make any long term commitments. The very beginning of any relationship is typically the most exciting. Especially if you are being love bombed (which is a HUGE red flag BTW). Plus, you admitted that your a LTR/marriage type guy so it will be tempting if she starts dangling that "I've never loved anyone as much as you. You're my soulmate. I can't ever imagine living without you. …
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/21 03:52 PM
5

my struggle include situations where my wife after great sex asks what I want and what I want to say is I want you to act like total slut with me... but I feel like this pretty much breaks the STFU rule... Unless I misunderstood, it sounds like she was asking for your direction so why do you need to be vague or STFU? Instead, why don't you tell her one specific thing she can do and see what happens. “What do you want me to do?” “I want you to buy a cheerleader outfit and surprise me one night by…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/21 08:24 PM
1

How can you keep track of all the different people interests, hobbies, likes, dislikes etc. By paying attention when they talk about themselves. And if you can’t remember then you don’t give a shit about their interests, hobbies, likes, dislikes, etc. anyway so it doesn’t really matter. Just seems very mentally and emotionally draining to me. It's only as draining as you make it. Just because you are seeing multiple people at a time doesn’t mean you can't set a schedule you're comfortable with. …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/21 08:52 PM
1

How can I date now knowing my dark past of misogyny and disrespectful actions? By being a philogynist who treats his dates with respect. Which will also help you with the self-forgiveness healing process. Does my future partner deserve someone like me who has done these pathetic things? That depends on how you treat her. But for now you probably shouldn't date anyone until you have your shit worked out and are ready to provide some emotional stability to that future companion.
/r/ExRedPill23/04/21 06:47 PM
1

Thank you all for helping me out in the askMRP reddit with my situation with my bipolar girlfriend . I actually wrote a long reply to that post a couple weeks ago but I don’t know if you saw it so I’ll sum it up here. I basically explained that, as someone who raised a child with a bipolar woman, I know how bad it can get during a manic episode. So you need to take this very seriously. You are possibly dealing with a girl who has a clinical mental disorder so do yourself a huge favor and take it…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/04/21 03:55 PM
-1

Ok but what assures your partner that you really changed? Other than death, there are no assurances in life. That's especially true when it comes to relationships so don’t bother looking. All you can do is try to increase the odds in your favor. So instead of puzzling over all the different what if’s of relationship dynamics like body count and pair bonding statistics, change your focus on trying to become more attractive, resourceful, educated, funny, exciting, fun, rich, or whatever, than your…
/r/ExRedPill22/04/21 06:49 PM
3

Getting married is not an option for people who are unwilling to take the risk. Which I’ll agree can be life shattering. Whether you’re married, in an LTR, or just knock some girl up, there will always be the potential for circumstances which are out of your control. If you want kids then you’ll have to be willing to accept that risk. But also work hard to control what you can. Never stop trying to become/remain a man who is worth keeping. That’s the core message of TRP anyway. The rest of it li…
/r/askTRP21/04/21 09:02 PM
1

I was actually with a 20 year old when I turned 40 and caught alot of flack for dating someone so young so I never considered it again. But maybe just for sex, it would be ok. Click on "What is Frame?" in the sidebar if you want to learn how to kill that ego protection and validation seeking mentality and live your life in a way that's most fulfilling to you. The bottom line is who cares what they think. The people giving you shit aren't going to meet those needs for you so fuck their judgements…
/r/askTRP21/04/21 07:08 PM
4

I became depressed, anxious, and desperate. The world did not open up magically like I thought it would. This is why you shouldn’t get married or even cohabitate for at least the next 8-10 years. There are too many things you still need to learn and experience. Nothing ever magically opens up in life. Anything of significance will have to be earned through discipline and hard work. And even then it’s not a guarantee as many of the guys here can unfortunately attest to. And don’t be depressed. In…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/21 09:29 PM
1

In the end, my wife was fucking Chad. Big surprise. However, Chad was also married and lurked here on this sub. Chad was also upset that my wife broke things off with him. Chad was able to pick up enough details from my posts that he successfully surmised my true identity and doxed me to my wife. She then was able to successfully guess my reddit password and proceeded to delete my /u. Luckily she has no idea how reddit works and neglected to delete my individual posts….they still litter the OYS …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/21 03:30 PM
2

Nothing about TRP is correct. The problem with your statement is it implies that All People Are Like Me. Which of course they are not. There are people who believe what you do about TRP because they shared a similar experience with it. Most people in this sub would probably fall into that category. But there are also men and women who are thankful that some of the RP principles were applied to their relationship. Quite a few of which were right on the edge of collapsing before some of the TRP ph…
/r/ExRedPill09/04/21 04:43 PM
1

My inability to trust, my jealousy, and my untrustworthiness These are rooted in insecurity and seem to be pretty common with a lot of TRP guys. Its also extremely unattractive behavior to both men and women so I'm curious how you plan to overcome it so it doesn't impact your future relationships.
/r/ExRedPill09/04/21 03:57 PM
1

Dude, this is kinda fucking creepy you want to know (and already know) so much about my wife. And are obsessed with SMV. Shit yeah you’re right it is. But like I said I read your OYS history so that’s how I know all that. As for why I wanted to know? I don’t know I guess I always thought SMV was strictly related to age and physical attractiveness and was confused about how you were determining it. However why I cared about that in the first place would actually be a much better question for me t…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/21 10:40 PM
1

Fair enough. Well in that case you might consider the following adjustment to better reflect the reality of where you seem to be. Mission: Eat, Lift, Read and learn how to have fun. Just be myself, whatever that is. Create the man I want to become with the unwavering frame to support him. My Plan: My plan is to make certain that I truly understand the correct path to follow going forward to insure that my continuation of putting one foot in front of the other doesn’t just lead to more years of w…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/21 06:39 PM
1

At it's peak, the SMV gap between my wife and I was probably 3 points. Now it's probably 1 This is just a curiosity question but how does a post-wall 36 year old woman raise her SMV 2 points? I read your OYS history last year and think I remember you saying she was a HB9 at her 20 something runway model peak but became an HB7 in her thirties? Then there was some comment about looking at her naked body (or ass maybe) and it was really unattractive. You also said she was even skinnier than usual a…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/02/21 02:28 PM
1

Why did you feel so terrible? You essentially delivered a nicer version of the Fuck Me Or I'll Fuck Someone Else speech. Which you have actually been contemplating and rightly so. And frankly that whole aftercare situation read more like it could be her trying to manipulate you than it was her feeling genuine shame for not fulfilling her marital obligations. Now I realize that I don't know either of you and I wasn't there, but if she was truly concerned about you or your needs and actually wante…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/21 06:11 PM
1

Whatever you do make sure you save ALL of texts and missed call notifications.
/r/askTRP03/02/21 12:34 PM
1

Can you stay with a friend? Or just get out of town for the weekend? Maybe visit your friend in that other city. Might be worth the cash to avoid any potential legal trouble seeing as this girl seems really unhinged.
/r/askTRP03/02/21 12:32 PM
1

Yeah I know what you mean. Any form of dread sex is basically a negotiated transaction and not from a place of genuine desire. And again, I was only referring to the possible benefit of passive dread in context to the dead bedroom guys whose marriage and family are already on the ropes. But if he is married with kids and doesn’t want to lose both then it might just be the spark he needs to get the relationship headed back in the right direction. Like I said it can be beneficial as a shot across …
/r/ExRedPill02/02/21 09:26 PM
4

Fuckin' A dude. My apologies for the external validation but your level of honest and intelligent self-awareness at this stage in your journey is pretty impressive. As is your ability to recognize how detrimental your ego is to achieving genuine OI and eventually being able to obtain a true abundance mentality. Reading this OYS reminded me of a few times when I had read some of HOA’s “ah ha” moments during his journey to unfuck himself. Where the self-analysis was honest, intelligent, accurate, …
/r/MarriedRedPill02/02/21 03:17 PM
2

I agree. I am much more sensitive when teasing my female friends than I am with my male ones. With them anything goes short of actually trying to emotionally destroy them (like making jokes about a dead relative or something like that). But with a female friend the teasing is just enough to get a little laugh or a smiling "hey that's not very nice" kind of reaction but not hurt her feelings. Unlike the hardcore ego jabs my male friends and I do to eachother.
/r/ExRedPill02/02/21 12:07 AM
1

You take much more shit from female friends and act comoletely different. Huh. This has always been the opposite for me. My male friends break my balls much more and vice versa than my female friends ever do. But you are correct about it not remaining strictly platonic with female friends. Unless they are married or one of you don't find the other one attractive you will almost always end up getting it on at some point in the friendship. The most common time seems to be when there is a combinati…
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 11:41 PM
1

I think applying ACTIVE dread is horseshit. Passive dread can be beneficial to the dead bedroom LTR guys. Assuming they got their fat lazy asses off the sofa and put in the months of work required to make themselves attractive as possible to their partners again. But assuming they did, a passive situational heads up shot across the bow to let their partners know that "passionless once a month starfish duty sex isn't going to work for me anymore and now you're fully aware that I don't have to set…
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 11:15 PM
2

True but don't kid yourself. Sowing division is a tool for the powerful in general not just wealthy capitalists. Socialists do the same thing with class division. I mean Stalin, Castro, and Chavez were not sharing two bedroom flats with 3 other families like the citizens were forced to do. They were living in palaces and eating caviar just like the CEO of twitter and Facebook. Even her professor falls victim to this on some level. Preaching against inequality like student loan debt while at the …
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 10:56 PM
1

You are smart to be aware of your insecurity. There is nothing wrong with honest communication about setting comfortable boundaries for eachother or your relationship. But jealousy, mate guarding, showing a lack of trust, snooping through her phone, etc. are all big indicators for a lack of self confidence and/or your confidence in her and your relationship. And that's not an RP tenant. Its a since the beginning of time attraction characteristic. The fact is that women are not attracted by uncon…
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 09:20 PM
3

Pushovers finish last. Nice guys with self confidence and a backbone usually get the best overall results in most aspects of their life. Whereas assholes might win a battle here and there with that DNGAF attitude but likely lose the war in the long run. Most of those guys don’t seem very fulfilled or happy deep down if you ask me. Even if they achieve some monetary success or have success picking up women. Pushovers however will get shit on every time. In their careers. In their friendships. And…
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 08:58 PM
1

Because there are more potential for complications and a higher overall risk vs dating a woman without kids. For example if you date a single mom long enough then you will most likely form a bond with her kids which can hurt a lot more if the relationship ends. This happened to a friend of mine. He dated a divorced woman who had 2 little kids. They were together for 7 years and lived together for 5 of those. So he pretty much usurped their bio fathers role in their lives since he saw those kids …
/r/ExRedPill01/02/21 08:37 PM
-4

I haven't read anything in RP literature that espouses hating women as a RP tenet or even side effect. Sure there is the anger phase when you realize that the Disney fantasy is unrealistic bullshit for the vast majority of people but you shouldn't hate women for that. That wasn’t their doing. It was the medias propagation of societal norms that created that narrative for the most part. Ex: Happy wife happy life. That kind of stuff. For the most part RP just gives a generalized explanation of gen…
/r/ExRedPill22/01/21 10:18 PM
0

I think most of the RP dialog is coming from men who have experienced severe relational trauma and are desperate to avoid going through that ever again. So they focus more on the basic needs that women provide for them while also trying to protect themselves emotionally and financially. And this is what leads them to strictly seek sex and boxed companionship from women in their lives. And that is completely fine so long as they are honest and upfront with the women they choose to date, plate, LT…
/r/ExRedPill22/01/21 07:03 PM
1

You could have replied "What can I say, Fortis Fortuna Adiuvat" or something like that then leave it alone until she decides one way or the other.
/r/askTRP04/01/21 04:57 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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