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blurgg77 Archive

View 8 posts and 26 comments by blurgg77 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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19

Wow - this is the most astute observation and is so accurate I feel like you just read a book about my life lol! He is great with money, saves everything (except what he spends on his gross habits), and used to care a lot about being "I show up to the office in a suit every day"....but every since lockdown, he is doing the BARE minimum at work and allowing his terrible life choices to spill over into his work life. Luckily for him he is just smart enough to still do a good job. I do most of the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 11:17 AM
8

I remember when I first started reading FDS a while ago, I would look for posts just like these to show myself "look at what somebody had to deal with, started to think it was normal, and still was able to leave". Because now that I had a very tiny amount of distance, I do realize I was being heavily gaslighted. Manipulated. And I'm working through it, maybe this wasn't the best place to post. I will say the first year he did a great job of hiding almost every single red flag - and at that point…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 11:06 AM
4

this comment made me laugh SO HARD, thank you. that's what a fe wow his exes looked like so you're not wrong
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/22 10:50 AM
30

Thank you so much for this <3 I'm going to save it and re-read it daily!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 06:32 PM
14

Lol I know. It's because he was very good at hiding everything for the first year. then COVID hit and we moved in together (I know, dumb idea, but my state went on very strict lockdown and my lease was ending, and I didn't know how to find a new place or how to get home. It was when everything was VERY scary). and now it's like I have stockholm syndrome....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 05:01 PM
338

Very handsome unfortunately...even despite the 50lb weight gain. Over 6 feet lol. Rich. Claimed to have family values (but obviously does not...lol). I was also only 23 when I met him, he seemed so mature and together with his fancy job, house, big friend group, etc. Then slowly over COVID I saw the real him, and it's only getting worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 03:03 PM
2

I love this. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 08:02 PM
2

I'm sorry - I didn't mean to violate any rules. I have read the handbook twice, but I think I'm still really trying to rip myself out of my pick-me phase. I am 100% behind the FDS concepts when they apply to other people, but I'm trying to get over the hump to see them for myself. So seeing all these comments really is helping me. Again, sorry about violating any rules.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 07:29 PM
10

I never considered it might be abusive. But you might be right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 06:21 PM
8

Basically whenever we've had a fight with crying and/or yelling, he basically tells me I have to leave RIGHT NOW, even if it's 11pm on a work night and he knows I have nowhere to go but a hotel. And sometimes when he's told me this I've been drunk so I couldn't even drive. So I cry and tell him "I have nowhere to go in the middle of the night, at least let me leave in the morning" and he says "no pack your shit right now". Eventually he relents and lets me stay. But every single time he threaten…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 06:21 PM
26

Thank you for sharing - I should've continued vetting into quarantine and it's good to know there were men who DIDN'T spiral during quarantine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 05:15 PM
25

I totally relate to this. Not only did my dad commute hours a day for work, but he helped around the house, cooked a few nights a week, did major household maintenance, was very present with his children's school and hobbies, treated my mom with gifts and trips, AND found time to develop his own interests and never stop learning. He made it look so easy, too. I struggle to find a man who can bear to tear himself away from video games before 5am.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/21 11:37 AM
1

I am impressed how many of you have chickens/horses/gardens etc! I'm so jealous haha.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/20 09:27 AM
0

About as well as I expected, maybe a bit better. He basically said "I know you want kids one day, but right in this moment I don't know when I'm going to be responsible enough for that." He also said "I know this sounds bad, but I'm thinking one day it's going to get bad enough for me where I am forced to get my life in order." - and I was thinking when he said that, why can't that be NOW? Isn't it bad enough for you right now? He doesn't want me to move out but he isn't stopping me, and he isn'…
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/19 02:01 PM
1

Well to be fair, he will never find work in his field without a masters. That's just a fact. He has applied to lots of semi-related jobs, but they all want people with more experience than he has. Plus the 2 year gap isn't good. And now he has a year of very very unrelated/random work experience. So finding something 'real' (for lack of a better word) is harder and harder for him every day without going back to school for something. At least that's how I see it.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/19 03:57 PM
1

Well, he chose to move to this city when he was still unemployed, and right when I graduated and started applying to jobs. It's his home town, and we lived with his mom for a couple months while I worked and he looked for jobs (kind of). Overall, he is applying to things, but always feels like 1) he is overqualified and wouldn't want the job anyway, or 2) sees a job he wants but doesn't apply because he thinks he won't get it. It's a negative feedback loop. I see this pattern of self sabotaging …
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 10:44 PM
0

I am definitely worried about seeming like a gold digger. What I really want is for him to be passionate about what he does and for him to keep his sights set on helping me bring income to support a family. If he had a low paying job that he felt passionately about, I think it would change everything. But he's not content with what he does, but doesn't care enough to change it. If he does want a family some day, I can't keep working my very stressful job (I work 50-60 hours a week now, and I wou…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 10:40 PM
2

I have tried taking him out to dinner many times, and he gets mad that he has to leave the house. So instead I order us food all the time - I always pay. He has offered once in a blue moon, but I don't really mind because I am the one who initiated the dinner. I know he doesn't like going out and doing things, so when I try to show him my love in that way, I end up getting him things. But this isn't the same as a shared experience where we learn to relate to each other better and spend more time…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 08:47 PM
3

I feel like it could be a bit of both. Because during one of our only fight-fights a year or two ago, he said "you know, I never even wanted to live with anyone anyway. that wasn't part of my plan" - implying he only moved in with me to save money, not because he really wanted to. He later said he has really enjoyed living with me and that he's sorry and all that, but he still had that thought/feeling at some point. If he was rich, I really don't know if he'd have moved in with me by now. And of…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 08:43 PM
3

Yeah - I can totally see where you're coming from this. Honestly, it's not the money that's the problem. It's the ambition thing. I am fully aware that in this kind of economy, I will probably have to work for the rest of my life, at least part time at a certain point. But I'm worried that as an educated man who went to an amazing college who could really do anything he sets his mind to just chooses to not set a goal. It's hard to watch somebody intelligent give up like that. He has tons of grea…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 08:25 PM
8

Oh man. This really hit home. Thanks for your honesty. I know it sounds dumb, but I almost didn't make the connection that his loyalty might just be convenience. I guess it's those love goggles I've got on, haha.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 08:12 PM
3

Thanks for the advice! I have actually tried to do things for him like what you suggested, but the issue is he doesn't find any of those things fun. i actually laughed out loud about the massage one, because I am pretty sure he'd rather die than have a stranger rub his back, hahahahahah. Whenever he's upset I will go and bring us back food from a restaurant he likes, because he hates going out to eat/leaving the house even when i suggest it. So I try to be thoughtful and do "fun" things with him…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 07:36 PM
7

That's crazy how similar these two situations are. I do feel like I've talked about my needs plenty of times over the years, but I've never seen anything done to fix them. Meanwhile I've bent over backwards to give him what he needs because I genuinely care about him and want him to succeed for his own sake, not just "our" sake. I'm so happy that you were able to find somebody good for you :)
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 07:29 PM
10

I love the big text haha!!! Really sends the message home. I agree. I tend to blame myself for everything, maybe more than I should. I probably should've mentioned this - but he mentioned during one disagreement we had that he kind of blames me for not having a job for 2 years. Because HE chose to stay with me. He apologized later for saying this and said he didn't mean it, but I can't help thinking this must be how he really feels.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 06:58 PM
4

For #1, what worries me is that it seems like he's already given up, because #6 is a pretty common theme in his life. He complains all the time about how much smarter/more qualified he is than everyone, but he's not doing everything he can to escape the situation he's in. I'm worried it's becoming a cycle and these qualities are feeding into each other. It's funny you mention the list of things to do on dates, because I actually made a super specific one with all the cool restaurants/museums/bre…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 06:18 PM
24

Thank you for this. I think you're right, moving out but not breaking up (yet) is probably the best thing to do. I'm too close for comfort and can't really see things for what they are, but I don't want to end things completely yet.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/19 05:50 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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