bridd84 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
5	Being bled dry! Find an attorney who will do limited representation, hire them to prep and attend trial only. Paying attorneys for false settlements is painfully draining. Besides, they will lose their strategy to drain you, be forced to deal with you directly, and get pushed out of their comfort zone. If they actually want to settle, you’ll just tell them what you want and they’ll either agree or go to trial with the differences.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/01/23 04:07 AM
4	What to look out for when hiring a lawyer? Depressing af but important to avoid getting taken advantage of.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/07/22 03:34 AM
5	What to look out for when hiring a lawyer? Ask if the lawyer or paralegal will perform redline document changes, MS Word Track Changes is most common. Avoid them if they only send letters or bulleted emails with changes to documents. Ask if they console their clients emotionally, and don’t go with anyone who does. Lawyers are not therapists, but pretend to be to rack up hours. As about communication preferences… are text messages ok, can you reach them off hours on critical dates without excessive costs, will the consult you before makin…	/r/Divorce_Men	07/07/22 03:30 AM
1	In desperate need of advice Read this book and get a coaching session with Jack Ito. Plan a new version of you, and be that way. Get ready for some hard truths you may have to learn to accept about yourself, he is remarkable. https://www.amazon.com/Overcome-Neediness-Get-Love-Want/dp/0989099946 https://coachjackito.com	/r/Divorce_Men	23/06/22 12:35 PM
2	Just a little advice. Learn actions you have the right to exercise of civil procedure. Nothing else will give you the confidence you deserve for someone in your position. Don’t abuse them, but don’t let anyone, even an attorney, intimidate you without knowing them: https://archives.lib.state.ma.us/bitstream/handle/2452/808179/on1125983551.pdf?sequence=1&isAllowed=y#page153	/r/Divorce_Men	15/04/22 03:16 AM
1	confusion Give it a shot. Post-partum affects everyone differently. Be clear with yourself what you’ll tolerate and what you’ll do if you won’t. I did two years of ambivalence, marriage counseling, and relationship coaching before I wouldn’t tolerate it anymore. Kids deserve a chance for a real family, if she can pull it together.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/10/21 01:27 AM
1	Hey guys. Not divorced yet but she’s drifting away fast. I’m become somewhat unhinged with despair trying to change her mind but I think it’s only making it worse and her decision easier. Any advice for how I can be to hope for a change in the outcome Lots of helpful points on this page: https://coachjackito.com In short, as right as it feels to hold on tight, hold on loosely (38 Special) and try not to pull a Tommy Boy and kill the sale: https://youtu.be/c1EyN9xTK94	/r/Divorce_Men	05/08/21 03:07 PM
8	Almost there Not to be nit-picky but suggest replacing “decree” with “separation document” in vernacular until after the court accepts the document. I learned this after doing it myself for a while, and my attorney corrected me because “decree” means the document has been mutually agreed upon between you and your STBEW and accepted as record with a court. You won’t want to imply any agreement until you sign it. That’s great news you are free of child support and alimony. Too bad about the house and memories,…	/r/Divorce_Men	28/06/21 03:18 PM
2	Child Support is so Heinous An attorney could help you file a complaint for modification to reduce child support by adjusting for her income and imputed income from the money she’s saving living with her parents. 80% is so high! Maybe that could free up some money to spend on your kiddo.	/r/Divorce_Men	21/05/21 01:22 AM
3	How do you guys deal with the bitterness? I find comfort in acknowledging and monitoring my situation, so I use the burns checklist to see where my head’s at and what are the biggest things holding me back from happiness by scoring myself on this checklist regularly: https://www.uwgb.edu/UWGBCMS/media/Continueing-Professional-Education/files/Assess-Pkt-1-Burns-Depression-Checklist.pdf	/r/Divorce_Men	04/05/21 10:34 PM
3	Going in to battle --medical bills My first suggestion is to call the orthodontist yourself and ask to catch up on the appointment notes with the doctor directly to understand the diagnosis for yourself. Then get a second opinion on the treatment and a quote / estimate if possible. Send her what you feel is reasonable or what you’re required to pay by the separation agreement, whichever is higher, to CYA.	/r/Divorce_Men	30/04/21 03:15 AM