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View 1 post and 32 comments by btgarner on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

btgarner/r/Divorce_Men14/05/19 01:35 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
8

There really needs to be a push for federal Child Support guidelines. I don't know what those would look like, but assuming a 500/50 split, I envision that there would be a tapered payment system (100% for year 1, down 20% for every year there after). Five years is more than enough time for the other parent to get their act together and support their kids. But that is an unpopular opinion the only way this is going to happen is if we (as a country) show why this makes sense, and stories like the…
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/22 04:00 PM
5

Upvote and this IS the right answer. Divorce is not going to help her depression, and it's going to be stressful for you. You owe it to both of you to try and fix what is broken first. Yes, somethings are broken beyond repair, but filing for a divorce with her in that condition is not going to lead to a win-win solution.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/22 06:05 PM
4

Find something that you (plural) can do together. My daughter (14) and I volunteer at the local humane society. She is also interested in cooking and baking so nto only do I ask her to help with planning, I ask her to decide and help with the coking and baking. Have things to talk about; your 15 year old is old enough to start thinking about college majors, so print out a list of majors and discuss 2-3 with here every weekend. The big thing is that you will probably need to initiate these things…
/r/Divorce_Men14/01/22 07:12 PM
2

I am in a 50/50 situation, yet I pay 86% of the child costs. I am apparently paying so much that the ex was able to quit her job and go back to school. And yes, this is from the state child support calculations. CS needs to be tapered off. I am not unwilling to pay for my child but there is truly no reason for my ex to do better when the state is going to mandate that I pay 72% more than what she does.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/21 04:39 PM
1

I tried. My divorce was ~5 years ago, when many upcoming artists were selling custom audio tracks to people. So I paid several hundred to an upcoming band that I had found in the UK for a "Celebratory Song," they never delivered, nor did I ever get my money back. Now that band is signed to a major label, and at this point it is a bit past the desirability of getting said track.
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/21 09:18 AM
10

Offer to get her the mental help she needs, if she refuses, file. If she cannot follow through on helping herself, then file.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/21 08:51 PM
5

My ex tried this as well. A sternly worded letter from my attorney (outlining what child support covers) was all that was needed to stop that nonsense. But don't worry, there is plenty of other nonsense that exes pull out.
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/21 11:47 AM
6

It is a waste of time, and just leads to frustration. .. unless you are overwhelmingly handsome, and 6ft or above. I have not logged into my profiles in weeks, and oddly enough, I have had the exact same number of dates, and much more free time on my hands that would have otherwise been spent chasing after women (figuratively, not literally) who won't acknowledge my existence. YMMV depending on location, age, and a bunch of other things, I understand that. But in general, for 80% of guys out the…
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/21 07:52 PM
5

And that is why I do not think this is fair this way either. We cannot complain about the fairer gender reaming our paychecks after a divorce, then celebrate when the opposite happens. The whole system needs a national overhaul that weens the underearning partner off whatever sweet teet they latched onto. Unfortunately, this is an complex issue, and more persons would rather decide using emotion, then what is fair for both parties.
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/21 05:04 PM
2

Get your attorney to write up a separation agreement that outlines all of the above. You may need to be more specific about some things (like being able to take what you want from the family home). Couple of things that I would be sure to add: 1) that you can sell your half of the house when you need to. Obviously she gets the right of first refusal, but do not get trapped with half a mortgage that you cannot collect on. 2) Go 50/50 with the kids. It is easier to go 70/30 (you with the 30) later…
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/21 12:57 AM
2

It's is going to depend upon how income is defined in your agreement (or by your state if there is no agreement). The government does consider profit from a house sale as capital gains, but there are exclusions (profit under $250K for a single person; or if you use those gains to re-invest in another home within a certain time frame after the sale). As others have said, you really need to have someone knowledgeable about your exact financial situation, and who can review the definition of 'incom…
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/21 11:38 PM
3

She will get an increase, no doubt. Odd how when your salary goes up they can find a way to suck off of that immediately, but when the well runs dry, it takes months to stave off the trickle. It is unclear from your post but you imply that the Ex does not have an income (you say that while together she did not, and make no mention of the current situation), so be sure that you are using an imputed income for her if either she has none, or is under employed. Your attorney can help you bring that …
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/21 07:57 PM
6

Accusations like this need to have the Anti-SLAPP treatment applied to them. If you accuse a person of abuse (et al), and it turns out not to be true, then the accuser is liable for all expenses incurred by the accused to defend themselves. This behavior is done because it is a no lose situation. If nothing happens from the accusations, things carry on, despite the cost, (monetary, physical, and emotion) to the accused. Closing this "No Loss" loophole would hopefully make it so that in these sor…
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/21 02:54 PM
2

If her income does get imputed, be sure to get the child discount as part of her benefits, and therefore should be included in the total of her "employment value."
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/21 05:33 PM
1

Couple of observations (and I am not making any judgments, these are just generic things for any guy should pay attention to during this process). 1) Push for Spouse support (not alimony), this is used to get your STBX on her own and puts a more temporary restraint on the time frame; it may ever taper off rather than just stop after some amount of time. It may not work, but it is worth a shot. 2) determine an imputed income for the STBX -- this is the realistic amount of money she could earn if …
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/20 12:24 AM
2

As others have said, since you both make the same amount, the obligations should be equal. However, your attorney may be able to make an argument that since her expense are less (living with parents), that more of her income should be able go to child care. It can be a risky argument, especially if you have any "saved expenses" that she could also make the same argument about, so tread carefully. And the actual results of this argument with differ based on local laws, and the judge who ultimatel…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/20 09:31 AM
3

Any behavior that prevents you from communicating with your children is not looked upon kindly by family judges. Not only that, but she has basically stolen software licenses (from the xbox) by her actions. Contact your attorney, I can see where you should be able to get access to things, and honestly, it is worth fighting now. If you don't, she will just keep pushing things to make your life/time with your son as difficult as possible.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/20 09:26 AM
2

I don't know what state you are in, but I have a really hard time believing that. Just about every child support calculator is based off of the parents' salaries. Find an online calc for your location and plug in the values (you, or rather your husband) should have a copy of this worksheet as part of the ruling. I would even go as far to say call another attorney for a consult and get their opinion because that does not make sense to me. Not saying it is wrong, but it does not pass the smell tes…
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/20 11:58 PM
1

Not sure if you have tried, but you should really hire an attorney to place an imputed income value on the ex. Just because she is not earning money, does not mean that she cannot, and the child support MUST reflect that to prevent her being reward for laziness.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/20 09:07 PM
4

A lawyer will help you to calculate an imputed income for her if the reported income does not mesh with average salaries for her profession, and based on the lifestyle she is living. Just remember if you are trying to argue her income numbers up, and yours down, you are going to get pushback, so be prepared.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/20 06:52 PM
1

Don't do this. Unless you have an agreement about all medical costs going to her, doing this can open you up to legal issues.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/19 01:12 AM
1

Depending on your location, you should very easily be able to find your state's Child Support calculation worksheets to get an idea of what your weekly/monthly obligation will be. The only way to increase the other parties income (if it has not yet been increased) is to force an imputed income, this is basically saying that if the person were getting paid the average for their background, experience and skills, they'd make this amount, but are instead under employed and only making this much. Bu…
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/19 01:21 PM
1

The journey depends on a lot of different things, so your first move, regardless of anything would be to consult with an attorney or legal service who can walk you through the process for your situation, and advice on the steps you need to take to protect yourself and your interests.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/19 01:18 PM
1

Whenever you talk to the Ex (or STBX), never say what you are pursuing legally. The best answer is something long the lines of "I am looking into whatever option is going to be best for the children." Never show your hand, and the public face always, ALWAYS has to be kids first.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/19 02:04 AM
1

Half the time, think this is pretty much the default unless there is some really good reason not to.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/18 12:10 AM
1

Very likely. Very likely. Very likely. Michigan is a no fault divorce state, so that does not help since you are the spouse who was wronged. Now the good news, Michigan is not a community property state. That may help, however 5 years of a continued relationship will probably be viewed as forgiveness, so any transgressions from then may not play into things. You did not go into details about her current situation, but just texting may not be enough to throw anything in your favor. I know it's a …
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/18 05:34 PM
1

Have her buy the car from you (plural). So let's say together you owe $5K on the car, and if there is some equity in the car that you are going to recoup (say, $2K, but it can even be a single $1). She secures a loan for the debt and equity owed to you, then you sell the car to her, use the $5K to pay off the original loan, you get the agreed upon equity ($2K), and sign all the documents, you should be good. Car is in her name, along with a loan for $7K, again only in her name. Your local DMV sh…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/18 11:54 PM
1

Hard to say without knowing the value of the things on your end. Do keep in mind that it sounds like your savings are the only liquid asset (that is, ready usable cash), where as the car, house and 401K are all frozen to some extent (in increasingly solid order; she'd have to sell the car or house to get funds). Is she keeping everything in house that is not "yours?" Does that have any value? Keep in mind that anything your brought into the marriage is yours and usually non-negotiable for asset …
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/17 10:06 AM
–

I had the same scenario 8 years ago. I cannot tell you what to do, but I will say this, if your reconciliation does not work, then anything you have as ammunition for a divorce due to her cheating may be lost. Now, obviously this depends on your state and what the magic eight ball says about your reconciliation chances. If you want to protect your assets, consult an attorney and do everything that he/she says to do.
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/17 07:38 PM
1

I think I would do this then. Use the calculator both ways. That is, run it as though you have full custody and then one as your ex has full custody. You will come up with 2 numbers one that you owe her and one that she would owe you. Add these together and then multiply by the percentage that you will have them (50%). Subtract that number from the larger of the 2 numbers you first came up with. If your owing number was bigger, then you would owe, else she would owe you. Here is an example using…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/16 10:24 AM
1

You need to find the right worksheet to get a real number. Again, an attorney can help you with this. Usually the percentages are what matters, not the actual split of individual kids, but I think Washington also has special compensation based on the ages of the kids (children over 12 get more support than those under 12)
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/16 12:32 AM
1

If you are filing a civil agreement, then the numbers you (plural) decide (and how you decided them) are completely up to you (plural). If you are going to have a court ordered "agreement" then whatever 50/50 works out to be from the worksheets is what will be used. If you cannot reach a consensus, then you will end up with a court ordered agreement. So from my perspective (assuming your numbers are correct), you have nothing to lose by holding out, since the court ordered number ($550) is much …
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/16 09:22 PM
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