candid_salad Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
160	Making out with a girl? Good. Use this to make it more effective.		candid_salad	/r/seduction	30/05/15 06:57 AM
10	[FR] Fantastic night out.	Field Report	candid_salad	/r/seduction	24/04/15 05:18 PM
6	How to hook a set		candid_salad	/r/seduction	30/04/15 09:23 AM
5	[FR] Being fun and light-hearted. Deflecting serious conversation topics.	Field Report	candid_salad	/r/seduction	12/04/15 01:51 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
6	What you did to counter your disadvantage of looks? To put it simply, you have to stop giving a fuck what other people think of you. You can always work hard to improve your appearance by working-out, dressing well and getting a good haircut but these are all temporary fixes if you don't have that core confidence. As an example, I have a bald friend who gets laid a lot. If people point out his baldness he just fully accepts it and doesn't let it get to him. He'll either make a joke about it, or act playfully narcissistic about how awesome bald pe…	/r/seduction	24/08/15 12:53 PM
1	Not sure where I'm going wrong (granted I don't try very often.) Well you're answering your own question really. No-one is going to hand this to you on a platter. This sub sees some version of the post you just wrote every single day and guys are genuinely shocked that they can't just be nice and gentlemanly, average in terms of looks and have no girls just falling into their laps. It's like asking why you're no good at guitar when you don't practice and you've hardly ever tried to play it or learn. The guys who get really go…	/r/seduction	03/08/15 08:43 AM
9	Struggling to get my head around Alex's 'you are enough' concept This really gets to the heart of a concept that I didn't really understand until a couple of years ago. In your childhood, there have always been authorities. Your parents have always told you what to do, your teachers have always had the last say and are able to get you into trouble if you disagree with them. It's possible that you've also had religious authority figures in your life i.e. you have to do what God says or you'll be punished. If you're not careful, since you've always had authorit…	/r/seduction	01/08/15 02:58 AM
19	(FR) Im so beta, i could irradiate electrons I think you did really well actually. A couple of things: "Would that change if i had a boyfriend?" Hot girls often have boyfriends. That's just the way it is and it's something that you have to learn to deal with if you're to get good at this. Don't let it get you down. I decided to act cool, and said "not at all, just want to meet people that do workout with me (i do talk to people in the gym), could i have your number?" You presumably wanted to get to know this girl because she's attractive a…	/r/seduction	30/07/15 02:16 AM
1	Being too pushy? is my game lacking? this is the part where you tell me when I think this is the mistake. You shouldn't expect the girl to organise a location or time because you're the one who asked her out. You can't just ask her out and expect her then to sort out the details. I usually give the girl a choice of two days that we can hang out. If she flakes on both without a legitimate reason or an attempt to reschedule then she's probably not interested and you can move on.	/r/seduction	07/07/15 02:38 PM
39	How would you introduce yourself to a potential blind date? "Hey, I know this is totally random but I was chatting with Luna the other day and she wanted to try and set us up. I don't normally do blind dates but from what she was telling me you seemed really cool and I think it would be a fun thing to try. Anyway, I'm going for drinks at ____ on ____. If you're up for an adventure you should come along." This acknowledges that the situation is a little out of the ordinary which builds comfort. You're also coming from the frame of being a selective man wh…	/r/seduction	07/07/15 11:07 AM
3	I give up Getting good vibes from her made me feel like maybe I'm not a total fuck up. This is your problem. You should feel like you're not a total fuck up regardless of whether the girl is giving you good or bad vibes. Fix this first and everything else should follow.	/r/seduction	07/07/15 04:25 AM
1	Talking Topics First night, talked to a girl, had alright conversation, and got her number. She ended up having a BF though. Excellent. It doesn't really matter that the girl has a boyfriend as it's totally outside your control. The thing you could control was the approach and you actually did it which is great. Long story short, I tried to talk to her when the music died down, but she seemed more interested in partying around. Yeah I think you stuffed it up a little here. In a nightclub environment you need t…	/r/seduction	05/07/15 11:01 AM
10	Getting over Oneitis Hey, congratulations on making this post. Recognising that you're at rock bottom and finally want to start turning things around is the first step in a long process, so you've already made some progress! Firstly, Been waking up absolutely miserable since a break up with a girl over a year ago. I would book an appointment with a therapist if it's at all possible, just to check that you don't have depression and/or anxiety. Think of it like going to the doctor to check up on your runny nose - it c…	/r/seduction	05/07/15 10:27 AM
3	What is a good resource for young 21yo club game? The hardest thing to do in a loud nightclub is actually getting and holding the girl's attention. You're competing against loud music, and a generally chaotic environment so you need to be more intense off the approach. This means you need to focus more on body-language and eye contact rather than conversation skills. You're also going to need short, high impact openers which are going to grab the girls attention. For example, during the day it's perfectly acceptable to open with something indir…	/r/seduction	26/06/15 06:22 AM
6	[Field Report] I kissed two girls at the same time He did tell you how he did it though. I don't quite know what came over me at that split moment but before Brooke could say anything I replied "I wanna kiss both of you, how bout the three of us kiss?" He assumed they were both attracted to him and was fully congruent in the interaction. He wasn't thinking "holy shit, how cool would it be to make out with both of them?" whilst sitting there and doing nothing about it.	/r/seduction	07/06/15 10:17 AM
2	socially anxious guy needs halp If you have diagnosed anxiety I would really try and get into therapy. If it's absolutely not an option then I'd recommend trying meditation. There are meditative techniques which can give you more awareness of your current experience, so instead of trying to get rid of your anxious nervous thoughts you can learn to meet them head on and experience them without fear. You can find guided meditations on youtube which will help you start. Clubs here are not speaking friendly the music is loud, but …	/r/seduction	06/06/15 05:57 AM
10	How do you recover a date that flaked on you if you want to try again without seeming desperate? How do I try to get her to commit to a date this time? Every single problem you're having can be summarised by examining this sentence. You should not be trying to get anything from her. Just relax, if the girl flaked then she probably won't be up for a second date. That's fine. Don't worry about it too much and just go out, talk to other girls and get some other numbers. If you really, really insist on texting this girl again then try "Hey, I'm gonna grab a drink at ____ on _____. You should co…	/r/seduction	04/06/15 03:55 PM
11	Did I make the right call? I was in the exact same situation a few years ago and made the opposite call. That is, to stay in the relationship and just not have sex. Not only was it the most intensely frustrating experience of my life, but I felt emasculated every time I was with her because I was compromising on my values. It was horrible, and if I got into the same situation now I'd handle it the same way that you did. You made the right call.	/r/seduction	04/06/15 02:16 PM
3	[FR] 2 approaches but no numbers I made her laugh but she seemed a bit weirded out by the situation asking "do you do this a lot". I think she was kind've into you and this was a shit test. See the sidebar for some techniques on passing them. Basically just demonstrate confidence, high value and don't take it very seriously.	/r/seduction	03/06/15 01:43 PM
2	[FR] I approached a girl and told her she was cute I've always had trouble approaching on the bus for exactly this reason. A friend of mine who does really well on the bus usually sits near the front and smiles at the girl as they get on. That way, if they smile back he just gets up and talks to them as the bus starts moving.	/r/seduction	03/06/15 12:25 AM
24	[FR] I approached a girl and told her she was cute When you do your next approach, don't apologize at the end. Just say "Anyway, have a nice day" or something along those lines.You'll feel more confident and masculine just by being unapologetic about your sexuality and the fact that you find her cute. Sorry that this isn't on the level of some of the stuff that gets posted on here. Also don't apologize to us. You don't need to, we get hundreds of questions a day from guys at varying levels of expertise. I'd actually say this question is above so…	/r/seduction	03/06/15 12:23 AM
1	[FR] Day 2, didn't go so well With girls that are working you have to approach more indirectly so it makes it harder to escalate because you have further to go. I think your opener was fine because it was natural and organic, and then you can gauge whether or not they're interested once you start talking to them. I wouldn't avoid talking to girls that are working just because they're working. I can definitely think of situations where you would open a girl naturally while she's working and she's just really flirty and intere…	/r/seduction	30/05/15 07:39 AM
1	[FR] Field report, need pointers I'll tell you a secret. If you have the confidence to calmly walk up to a girl and say "Hey, you're really cute. What's your name?" Then you'll be completely fine in 100% of cases. Don't sit there and eye her up and down, it's way too easy to misconstrue as creepy. Also, you didn't actually show your intent in the interaction. She had no idea that you were talking to her because you thought she was attractive.	/r/seduction	30/05/15 07:18 AM
1	[FR] Day 2, didn't go so well This FR is fine, although I'll point out a few quick things. I intended to improve on yesterday and approach 10 girls 10 girls is a lot and I find that setting myself a goal like that makes some of my interactions feel forced. As though I'm talking to some girls just to fill up the numbers. If it works for you and motivates you do the approaches then by all means keep doing it, but I wouldn't feel too bad if I couldn't get 10 approaches done in a day. Turn to one and ask if I can borrow her frie…	/r/seduction	30/05/15 07:07 AM
10	[FR] First approach ever: "Music or me." Thankyou so much for this post. I've recently had a heap of trouble approaching girls with earbuds, this is some great motivation to try it out.	/r/seduction	25/05/15 04:48 PM
1	How to be a good wingman? This.	/r/seduction	25/05/15 09:53 AM
9	Approaching girls who MIGHT have a boyfriend? "Hey [girl's name], I know this may seem a little random, but I think you're really cute, and I'd love the chance to get to know you better. What do you say you and I grab a cup of coffee this weekend?" This opener is fine, if a little wordy. You don't need to rush through the whole interaction in the open. I might actually start a regular conversation with her first and then use this to setup a date but it's totally up to you. Also, put the fact that she might have a boyfriend out of your mind.…	/r/seduction	25/05/15 09:50 AM
2	Girl was looking at me, smiled and looked away. Now I know this means something but just to satisfy that voice telling me that I'm delusional, can someone confirm that this is something? Just a hint. Don't ever do this. If you're 99% sure of the answer to a question then just accept the answer and move on. You don't need anyone else's reassurance, and you don't need somebody else to tell you whether you're right or wrong. One of the most critical parts of seduction is being in control of yourself at all times. That means approaching that cute…	/r/seduction	25/05/15 09:42 AM
1	What should I do next? Well yeah, she seems really into you. Text her, set up a date and see how it goes.	/r/seduction	02/05/15 12:08 PM
3	Lost two girls with in 5 minutes last night. What's wrong with me :( I think you're already doing some things right here. You actually went onto the dance floor, you must have looked approachable and relaxed enough for girls to come and start dancing with you in the first place and now you've identified the things you did wrong and started to think about how you can get better. So if you know that physical escalation is a sticking point then start working on it. Keep putting yourself out there and learning from the uncomfortable situations, eventually they won't …	/r/seduction	02/05/15 12:07 PM
3	What should I do next? So what should I do next, should I text her or what? Yes.	/r/seduction	02/05/15 12:00 PM
3	How do you communicate with your wings which girl you are interested in? The goal of wingmanning is to isolate the girls from each other so that you can have a one-on-one conversation. The purpose of this is to get the girl in an environment where you can escalate the conversation without her feeling judged and where there's less distractions (friends pulling her away etc..) So all I do is talk to the girl I'm interested in and my wing will jump in and engage the other girl and bring her away into their own one-on-one. If he opens the set I'll do the same for him, ju…	/r/seduction	02/05/15 11:54 AM
4	FR Going to a new club as a beginner. Number close. This sounds like a really good FR. I think you did a great job by engaging the whole group and not showering the girl you had your eye on with attention from the outset. A couple of things with texts: Don't bother with timing your texts so as not to seem desperate. Text her when you want to. If she's interested she'll reply. I like texting the girl almost as soon as I get her number. It's a fun way of flirting but you can also check that she's actually receiving your messages and build some fami…	/r/seduction	12/04/15 01:09 PM