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carbe_donut Archive

View 1 posts and 13 comments by carbe_donut on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
15

carbe_donut/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:13 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

thanks for the info. anytime you need to vent married guy shit feel free to PM me as well.
/r/TheRedPill06/08/14 09:51 PM
3

I would like to know your process of taking the finances back over. I'm about to do something similar - I'll be opening a single checking account and moving my paycheck to that. Then putting a monthly 'allowance' into the joint checking for groceries and expenses. No longer will she be able to dip into more funds if we overspend out cash. Also will be canceling her credit card. I'm bracing myself for all the pouting and shit testing that will ensue. Would love to her your experience with it. Als…
/r/TheRedPill06/08/14 07:59 PM
1

I will definitely be separating accounts, as a tactic to encourage her to begin working and to have stuff better prepared for a divorce. Thankfully most of my assets are from before the marriage and safe from her. She is very skilled at all the tricks you have mentioned - I have chosen a lot of smaller battles along the way that have given me good practice in dealing with them, though there is always room for improvement - I still get internally irritated but am usually able to play them off or …
/r/askTRP04/08/14 11:11 PM
1

thanks, this is sort of what I've been trying to do already, except she has access to joint funds as a fall back if we go over our cash allotment. I will be changing to a personal account in the near future. I really liked this "If you aren't willing to work for <insert expense> then neither am I." One big sticking point with me has been paying for cable tv so I will be canceling that with this exact response. I need to take back control.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 10:58 PM
2

and unemployment fugue is a perfect description of this, every single thing you mention. She also has very little social life or friends because she is just always around the house - and then expects me to fulfill all her needs for attention and emotional support. I really hope me laying it on the line is the shock she needs to get out there. I think she would improve a lot with working.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 08:04 PM
1

Thanks. I've consulted an attorney and it looks like I'd probably be looking at 3-5 years of alimony. I'd rather pay the alimony and have full freedom in other areas of my life than support her and have her under the same roof with me, if it comes to that.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 07:57 PM
1

thanks - I'll check out the resources you mentioned, too.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 05:52 PM
4

I don't know if this will get any better, it's really a tough place to be in and a difficult decision. I'm not sure 45 is the prime of my life but I'll take your word for it.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:56 PM
3

thanks, this is helpful
/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:56 PM
3

So what do you suggest for me to own this situation?
/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:55 PM
1

Thanks. I have actually thought about picking up some outside work to meet my goals. I guess the thought of doing that while she does nothing creates a lot of resentment in me. You've given me a bit to think about, thanks.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:50 PM
2

Or are you saying it's my fault for not making enough money? I make 70k which is decent - I could also put the budget on lock down and stop her from buying expensive vitamins and organic groceries. I just don't know any women without children who don't work, it seems ridiculous to me.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:29 PM
3

No, I understand 100% that this situation has happened because I have allowed it to happen. That's why I am taking the necessary steps to rectify it. Get her working or divorce.
/r/askTRP04/08/14 04:23 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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