~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 261 | “Why are you still single?” And other questions I hate answering | DISCUSSION | cervaNera | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/21 02:35 PM |
| 203 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others… | DISCUSSION | cervaNera | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 11:49 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…Thank you! I also agree with you, it’s so difficult to untangle yourself when you’re also surrounded by people who are supposed to protect and support your best interests and yet everybody has this hidden agenda “well, at least she’s in a relationship instead of being alone.” How wrong we all are 💀 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 11:07 PM |
| 4 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…Right?! Marriage is supposed to be a partnership… Target wouldn’t sell half as many pillows with girly gold handwriting embroidered with “Marriage is a Struggle.” Jfc lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:49 PM |
| 6 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I think it’s hard to grasp being a pickme in a past life.. until you truly love yourself again. After regaining a huge amount of confidence the last several years I’ve managed to claw my way back to feeling like the best version of myself- so while it my be cringey to look back at the bullshit I let slide- I am Less Harsh on my past pickme self because I love myself enough to know it wasn’t my fault. I was being taken advantage of, I was manipulated, I was gaslighted, love bombed, emotionally ab… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:45 PM |
| 4 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I think that’s one of the things I really love about this space because I was never quite as vocal about being a feminist because some things didn’t line up for me, so it’s really great to see people having honest and blunt discussions about stuff that some women will just be annoyed by when they just say “I’m a feminist.” Without taking into account what that means in a patriarchy- so I look side eyed at stuff that’s blasted about “empowering women” when we’ve never lost our power, or making su… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:38 PM |
| 9 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I was the “dump him” friend, too!!! I wish I followed my own advice, my friends and I let so many LVMs just waste our time, but now I’m so much more secure & confident and can articulate better why I don’t like dating this guy or that and trusting your instinct and helping support my friends when they realize it, too. 👸🏼 Also I know exactly which post you’re talking about I remember it perfectly- it was a huge queen move and it Really helped me realize that I never needed any closure from any ex… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:31 PM |
| 5 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I’m so glad you didn’t have to deal with that, it must’ve been a great feeling of relief- that’s awful!! Trusting your gut is back on the table and FDS has really helped build my confidence back up, too! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:28 PM |
| 10 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…Ugh.. this. I word for word said this to an ex: “I don’t want to plan dates anymore. You plan the dates.” I manage multiple people at work all day long.. events all week long. If I go home and we go out I don’t want to do any planning besides getting ready and arriving. If you can’t figure out how to choose a restaurant and how to get us there AT BARE MINIMUM this will never work out. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:27 PM |
| 6 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…One thing I read a lot about on here that really justifies my feelings is that we get so engrossed about how all our friends are constantly dating/in relationships and when are standards are higher it’s definitely tougher to find somebody worth spending time with because of that. But THAT IS THE POINT. And what I’ve discovered and really enjoy reiterating to myself is that men are NOT competing with other men for my time… they are competing with ME. When you get those feelings of “I wish somebod… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:22 PM |
| 7 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…It’s an Amazing feeling though when you see a text or hear somebody saying that verifies your gut feelings about them. We grow up being told not to listen to it and give LVMs a “chance” for one reason or another and get burned in the end- so it’s almost prolific regaining the feeling of having the confidence back that Knows you deserve better than somebody who does this or says that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:14 PM |
| 7 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I love this! I felt exactly the same way. It was like coming into a room full of women and connecting with almost every thought or experience and all of them were on the same page about just wanting something better for ourselves. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:12 PM |
| 5 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I really feel for you and I’m so glad you got out of it for yourself. I love the mantra “if he wanted to he would” - it reminded me of a mantra I had to smack myself in the head with last year when I stupidly believed an NVM that he was going to do all the things with me that he could never do with his ex-wife because he “fell out of love with her.” It was me facing myself as a final boss of a pickme that I absolutely fell for a this nightmare of a “fairytale” just because we knew each other for… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:09 PM |
| 24 | “Well, she was just seventeen, You know what I mean”Holy shit that’s terrifying | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/21 02:23 PM |
| 14 | if you're in doubt remember all those lies: "men's desirability peaks at age 50. But women's desirability starts high at age 18 and falls throughout their lifespan."I was thinking the same thing 🤦🏽♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/21 06:39 PM |
| 5 | Rebuilding after traumaMy ex was allergic to a particular type of food that I L O V E D - But when I finally got away from him & broke it off… I spent the entire week after eating this food every single D A Y. Every bite was uplifting and reminded me that I was finally free. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/21 12:44 PM |
| 5 | As someone who’s writing a story that young girls and women are likely to read, what are some helpful lessons/themes I can integrate?.What’s really great is people are becoming more vocal about what’s appropriate behavior that doesn’t detract from the story. Shadow & Bone is a great example. Spoilers! In the book the villain makes the first move on the heroine, but in the Netflix series.. the heroine actually makes the first move and the 2nd time they kiss and it looks like they will go further, he pauses and verbally asks for consent and waits to receive it before continuing the moment. THIS IS HUGE. I didn’t even realize thi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/21 02:42 PM |
| 12 | As someone who’s writing a story that young girls and women are likely to read, what are some helpful lessons/themes I can integrate?.Things I wish I learned when I was younger to watch out for: 1) Grooming behavior. What is unacceptable behavior in acting towards girls. (Girls because I meant, for me.) That’s it. There are so many books I read growing up that would have an “inappropriate” relationship that you get “excited” about and imagine yourself in the position of the heroine or a character that you relate to. But the person displays all our known typical LVM behavior like gaslighting, future faking, lovebombing is HUUGE… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/21 12:09 AM |
| 3 | Part 2: Finance, Relationships and How to Protect YourselfThis is all gold & great information broken down, thank you so much for doing this, definitely saving for another read through when I start dating again! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/21 03:37 PM |
| 25 | Film: Good On PaperI read the interview in vanity fair about who she based this film on and her own personal experience, what a rollercoaster. Super positive FDS advice. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/21 03:31 PM |
| 102 | Almost allowed others to convince me to approach him but I found FDSIf. He. Wanted. To. He. Would. Expect nothing and you won’t be disappointed. Because he could’ve opened his goddam mouth and used words to say “I like you. I would like to take you out to dinner if you like me, too.” There’s absolutely nothing stopping him from doing this. Right now he’s just masquerading as a guy you like when in reality he could just be a LVM who enjoys getting attention from a woman whenever he can. Glad you know you deserve better! Edit: I’ve had a few shy guys ask me out in… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/06/21 07:50 PM |
| 50 | How do you end a date early?If you’re having anxiety about setting boundaries and worried about dates that are creepy or could get angry if you try to leave, maybe ask a friend to practice with you and build up your confidence. My friend and I set up a fake date together and both pretended to be creepy/aggressive/sexually forward and then each practiced saying exit lines. She actually ended up having to do this IRL (this was a few years ago when we were still leveling up) just a week or so after we did this and ended up ca… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/21 01:05 PM |
| 12 | Block and Delete: People Know Because Their Texts Turn GreenAs you get older you realize that there are very few people that would fall into “best friend” category. You wouldn’t trust anybody with almost all of your secrets or feel comfortable talking to other people knowing they’ll let “slip” some shit you’re trying to keep inner circle. So setting up boundaries however you want to to protect yourself AND YOUR GROWTH is something those other people will either learn to respect or they’ll disappear and you’ll never have to worry about ever again. One thi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/06/21 03:06 PM |
| 8 | Update on my life beyond an LVM. I have levelled up immensely :’)I wouldn’t trust “Adrian” as far as you can throw him. He “came back” and blamed somebody else for “brainwashing” him over you? Sounds like this guy will say anything to keep you on a back burner. I 💯 believe his ex came back into his life, so he had to cut all ties with you so she wouldn’t find out. Then, when it obviously didn’t work out (again) he walked it back and tried to get in touch with you again because you were easy to manipulate the last time. This may sound harsh, but I’m trying to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/06/21 02:55 PM |
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