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charmtheory Archive

View 2 posts and 16 comments by charmtheory on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Of course empathy and a dislike of hurting people are good things. :) What I'm saying is: first, set boundaries up front so women you're not serious about don't start to believe you're their long term boyfriend... search for "relationship frame" on this or any other pickup forum for tips on this. second, yes, breakups suck but they're a normal part of life but you have to decide if the threat of a potential bad breakup someday is really worse than never meeting someone in the first place. Someth…
/r/seduction26/02/11 10:34 PM
6

No, you're not the only one. I tend to fall victim to these thoughts, too. But they're completely irrational. It's sort of like women who don't want to lift weights because they're afraid they're going to start looking like a pro wrestler -- as if it one or two workouts were all it took. The truth is, sometimes you get the girl and then you find out you don't really want her. Maybe you even like her, but it just doesn't work for you. Maybe she's going to be very pissed and angry and dramatic whe…
/r/seduction26/02/11 06:03 PM
2

What are you, a middle school girl? Hahaha. I guess so. :) Channel that energy into your flirting Good point. I do that, sometimes... But sometimes I just forget. I guess I need to just practice it consciously. Thanks.
/r/seduction31/12/10 09:58 PM
1

I've done it way more than once... But you're right about remembering the look. I need to train myself to focus on the effect, not how I might feel in the moment. Thanks.
/r/seduction31/12/10 09:54 PM
1

I think you're onto something with the frame thing, but 'm not sure I understand completely. Do you treat unattractive girls the same way you treat attractive girls? Maybe that makes sense. Whenever I've been friends with a girl I wasn't interested in, I've tended to have my guard up, and they've often wound up being attracted to me. Hrm....
/r/seduction31/12/10 09:52 PM
1

Haha. That could help! :)
/r/seduction31/12/10 09:46 PM
1

I think you and I might be dealing with similar issues here. I used to be incredibly shy, but now I can talk to people when I need to - I just keep everybody at arms length. I started seeing a cognitive therapist recently about social anxiety, and she suggested that my problem is not so much with being social, but with intimacy. I'm still working through the problem, but I think a big part of the trick is to let your guard down and share more personal things with other people, even if it's as si…
/r/seduction06/12/10 01:43 PM
1

Yeah, that's kind of what I'm planning to do myself. Basically treating them as a temporary crutch. Good to hear it worked for someone else. :)
/r/seduction01/12/10 01:20 PM
1

When it was first forming, the guy starting it posted on Cliff's List Later on, I just googled Atlanta PUA and found what it had turned into.
/r/seduction01/12/10 01:54 AM
1

Good point, and I agree in general. In my case, each of the people I talked to was someone who'd brought those things up with me in the past. I'd always been one of the people that got uncomfortable with those topics and backed away. Now it seems like no big deal.
/r/seduction01/12/10 01:51 AM
3

I've been to two versions of the Atlanta Lair. When it was first getting started, it was just a couple guys hanging out, and one older, fairly alpha guy kind of monopolized the discussion. We went to a bar and a girl literally jumped on him. A couple years later, I came back and it was a totally different group of people. It was much more organized, and there was actually a structure to the meeting. It was a diverse crowd: everything from the guys who barely said a word to really cool, friendly,…
/r/seduction01/12/10 12:30 AM
4

Tony Soprano.
/r/seduction26/08/10 02:14 PM
1

Do you tip for the ice water? I feel weird going into a bar and not buying anything. Should I just get over it?
/r/seduction26/08/10 01:21 PM
1

Or take a lesson from the guy that got trounced there? He learned from that, and he kept working on his own game. He's doing pretty well for himself now.
/r/seduction26/08/10 01:01 PM
1

One other thought: sing songs that girls like. Even girl songs. I was at karaoke a couple weeks ago, and it was kind of dead, so I decided to sing Poker Face by Lady Gaga. Anyway, three girls came in with this big shy guy in the middle of the song and the girls went nuts. They were up dancing around and cheering. This is a girly song with a dance beat that talks about making her guy hot and bluffing with her muffin... I think it's a bit like the peacocking concept, because you have to be willing…
/r/seduction17/08/10 01:51 PM
1

This seems kind of funny to me, since I'm exactly the opposite: I have a hard time carrying on conversations, but find it easy to get up in front of a room and sing. :) Karaoke is nice because you're basically introduced to the whole room at once. If there's actually a KJ it's even nicer because they basically introduce all the singers to everyone so you get to know everybody's name, plus there's a built-in thing to talk about. You almost certainly can sing. Breathe from your diaphragm so you're…
/r/seduction17/08/10 11:16 AM
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