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chuckvsthelife Archive

View 2 posts and 164 comments by chuckvsthelife on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
7

chuckvsthelife/r/seduction13/11/19 09:33 AM
5

chuckvsthelife/r/seduction21/11/19 02:50 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

The thing with being rich, is it can help with the confidence and looks in the sense of money buys good clothes, perhaps someone to help style you. Great haircuts, gym, personal trainers. Generally you’ve been successful which feeds confidence. It’s easier to be rich but unnecessary
/r/seduction16/08/23 06:09 AM
13

You live in your parents house and you talk about hooking up with someone as “you put in the work”. It’s not a good look. I get it, rents expensive but like anyone else people base their life decisions either intentionally or not on risk analysis and probabilities. If I’m doing probabilities the likelihood that the guy who lives with their parents isn’t the top of the pile of people a woman could sleep with is higher. Worry less, be the best version of yourself. Getting women isn’t about putting…
/r/seduction18/10/22 07:15 AM
1

If you have truly worked through the jealousy you don’t catch feelings and have it be a major problem. IMO jealousy is a me thing, and I’ve successfully worked through it on multiple occasions. At the end of the day if I truly have strong feelings for someone, I prefer to be a part of their life. I can’t hold onto I hope I’m a bigger part but id like to support them in their happiness. Usually after a while I see things where it’s like, yeah we could have boned and they are attractive and I love…
/r/seduction30/09/22 05:22 PM
10

Which I will say can be done from a place of love but not one that has jealousy. Needs to be done from a place of “I love the journey for their happiness this person is on”. You can support that journey as a friend but you have to accept your role in it and their life. It’s one of the harder things in life to do.
/r/seduction29/09/22 10:34 PM
1

I mean I’m a bit bi, like half ways between straight and bi is my sexuality. The funny thing is…. I think women really like that. The more I try with women the worse it goes. People are really good at smelling a lack of authenticity.
/r/seduction10/09/22 06:17 AM
6

It also comes down to how it’s executed. I’ve multiple times been told it was hot when I asked for consent. It’s down to how it’s done and situations. I always ask for consent for kissing and I have a brief spiel before sexy times. It usually leads to more uninhibited sex, the “hey if you say no I’ll honor that at any point, and if something isn’t doing for it or you want something specific tell me, I can’t read your mind but I want you to feel good”. More likely to lead to hot sex than not IME.
/r/seduction10/09/22 12:05 AM
14

I honestly think you are reading into it wrong, just because you can push multiple times and eventually have it work doesn’t mean the author advocates for you to do that. Many other places in the books he talks about taking rejection and moving on.
/r/seduction10/09/22 12:02 AM
9

Honestly, as someone who went through the whole I’m a robot thing for so long… therapy.
/r/seduction16/07/22 05:42 PM
1

I got divorced at 26 with no friends. Within 2 years I built 5 really close friends. I’ve since moved away but I straight up text these people in some way or another daily. It’s not easy, it is doable. Find some meetup groups for some stuff that sounds fun. Like board games go play board games. Go out with them, got to a karaoke bar and work on general social skills talking and making friends…. Etc. Then spend the time investing in building those relationships. Straight up made me much much bett…
/r/seduction15/07/22 08:05 PM
3

Honestly my advice generally would be to focus on building a social circle instead of dating.
/r/seduction15/07/22 08:00 PM
1

Not super common in the US. In Europe party smoking very common IME.
/r/seduction31/05/22 11:52 AM
1

Should read about their scale, it’s only for faces and it’s supposed to be normally distributed.
/r/seduction26/05/22 07:27 PM
2

Jealousy can be a bitch too.
/r/seduction10/05/22 09:57 PM
2

The big difference for me in early dating is being open to having them. If you have already said no it’s not likely to change.
/r/seduction10/05/22 06:25 AM
5

Can be useful in some industries in combo with experience to get higher level director, VP, etc positions. Became really popular in the 2000s so now they don’t mean much unless you go to a top name school.
/r/seduction27/04/22 07:24 AM
18

Depends on the individual, but often good advice. Some women won’t come on early encounter no matter what just cause in their own head. My girlfriend came for the first time from oral this past year, and I have references Im quite giving and decent at it, she comes from penetration fairly easily though. Different people are different, being able to figure out and respond to what different people like is the true “good at sex”.
/r/seduction08/03/22 03:38 PM
3

I like to enjoy a small dose edible before going out. Similar affect to being tipsy in terms of reducing my social anxiety. Have to make it’s too much though. It’s quite a slippery slope if you do haha.
/r/seduction27/01/22 10:17 PM
1

Virginity is a construct. Are all lesbians virgins because no dick involved? Is using a dildo virginity breaking but masturbating for men isn’t? Virginity is whatever you say it is. It’s a way to make men feel bad and to control women’s sexuality.
/r/seduction24/01/22 03:51 PM
1

So…. I never made friends in college really do to a perfect storm of social anxiety and depression. Around 25 I learned I like being social. It’s harder now because of the pandemic depending on where you are but I made good friends by going to social type outing nights and a lot of the stuff that is “game” goes for making friends too. Say high, don’t be afraid to say you want to hang out get phone numbers of people etc. I made friends at a weekly MTB group ride off meetup, I went to karaoke bars…
/r/seduction13/01/22 04:46 PM
4

Honestly I think is all shit advice. Threesomes require three people open to a threesome. Do men tend to be more open to a threesome than women? Yes. Do women tend to be more apprehensive of a 3some with a single guy they don’t know? Yes. I also was fairly recently at an orgy that had a couple single guys and was about 60% women where the women were generally more attractive than the men, it’s generally IME just about meeting the right people with the right vibe. Often times those people have a …
/r/seduction12/01/22 08:11 AM
4

All push pull is…. is good banter. Surprise to no one people like people who are honest with who they are and they have good banter with. Sometimes two people don’t click that way sometimes they do, getting better at engaging with people makes you more attractive.
/r/seduction16/12/21 08:49 PM
2

There is something to the excitement of newness for many men and women.
/r/seduction16/12/21 05:34 PM
7

Sometimes validation is good, it’s nice to feel desired. Sure it’s better to feel self confident and such, but sometimes it’s hard. If you are constantly seeking validation it’s problematic. The occasional ONS can be fun too, also doesn’t need to be a sloppy drunk mess. People can have hookups that are actually good sex when you openly communicate and aren’t sloppy drunk.
/r/seduction16/12/21 05:33 PM
1

It doesn’t have to hitting on them either though.
/r/seduction04/12/21 04:37 AM
2

Giving someone a compliment isn’t hitting on people though. Although some cultures wouldn’t appreciate that either YMMV. Willingness to have someone you don’t know talk to you at all varies drastically across cultural boundaries. In the US though… I’m a straight parterre man. I’ll tell guys I like their shirt, women that their earrings are cute. Especially if our at a bar or some sort of social event.
/r/seduction04/12/21 12:15 AM
8

For every person who says they wish they would be approached every guy hears 10 that say that just being out in public isn't permission to be hit on.
/r/seduction03/12/21 10:01 PM
2

Starting from deceit, always a great idea /s
/r/seduction08/11/21 05:33 PM
1

I find it’s unhelpful to start from a place of distrust. No need to lie, shit we added to both those totals together. Sex is fun, no need to take it so seriously.
/r/seduction05/11/21 10:35 PM
3

Yep been there dealt with it myself. Self work needed to get around it. Therapy was involved in years of self work but not specifically on the issue. Core problem for me was that I couldn’t accept that I was enough.
/r/seduction05/11/21 08:16 PM
1

And vice versa, like you’ve sampled and know what you like.
/r/seduction05/11/21 08:00 PM
-1

Nope. There are studies showing some odd relationship between number of partners and marital success basically first partner works out better 2 is a lot worse. 3 is worse. Gets slowly better and plateaus. No definitive causation has been found. My theory is jealousy/ curiosity related. You don’t know when you haven’t had more. At 2 or 3 jealousy peaks from there it’s just slightly less attachment to your first but decreasing jealousy issues
/r/seduction05/11/21 05:09 PM
12

Yeah that makes sense. At least you are cognizant of it. Means you can work on it!
/r/seduction05/11/21 05:07 PM
42

Why? Again you don’t own her and it has 0 affect on you. If she settles down with you it means she chose you. FWIW my GF is at 29, I’m at 10. She was single and had a couple of ”ho phases” that helped her to grow and be the wonderful person I love. I was married to my first serious girlfriend. It’s all just life circumstances and how things work out. Even with a lower number I’m rarely jealous of the past. We are pretty open. She could be jealous of the connection I had with my ex wife (it reall…
/r/seduction05/11/21 03:36 PM
31

I draw a distinguishment between “nice guys” and “good guys”. Nice guys are nice to get what they want, they aren’t honest about how they feel and what they want. It’s manipulative behavior that smells of desperation. Good guys are honest about what they want. In the ways they are nice it’s because they are good people. Don’t express you interest in a girl by being nice to them. Express it by telling them you are interested. Do nice things because you are nice not because you want something.
/r/seduction05/11/21 03:16 PM
2

Honestly that sounds so fucking annoying.
/r/seduction23/10/21 10:11 PM
15

Well the problem is that women now generally only complement men if they want to have sex because most men will take any compliments as a desire to have sex. So it’s self fulfilling and you have to ask if it’s a chicken or an egg problem. Similar to this, women could complement men on anything that’s not their body much like I do with women generally. I don’t tell women they have a great ass, sometimes I’ll see a woman in a great dress on the street and I’ll just tell her that. “Just wanted to s…
/r/seduction29/09/21 06:02 PM
2

Whatever you try to grow into I don’t recommend it being an image. Instead grow towards whatever grind is the most sustainable for you. If you enjoy the grind of something you will keep doing it. The goal and image of one thing is hard to feed you forever.
/r/seduction23/09/21 12:52 AM
5

The difference between being a nice guy and a good guy is all that matters here. A nice guy says nice things for hopes it gets him something. It reeks of desperation and is not genuine. A good guy says nice things because he believes them. That’s all. A good guy also isn’t afraid to say something that people might not like because he is genuine. If they don’t like him they don’t like him. That’s all there is. If you get upset when people disagree with you, then you are also not being a genuine g…
/r/seduction24/08/21 06:25 AM
6

Yeah a girl having mostly guy friends is fine. They aren’t friends if she is just using them for her benefit though.
/r/seduction31/07/21 03:36 PM
1

Nahhhhhhh.
/r/seduction31/07/21 03:35 PM
7

Oh that’s also a thing, but there is an edge to it. It’s in how you carry yourself and usually one thing that’s nice (like the clean very white shoes vs stained green and brown from dirt and lawn clippings). You could easily just throw that on but the effort to keep the shoes clean shows. It’s very little effort realistically to have ok shoes but the minimal effort makes you look like you care about something. Caring about something is hot. With attraction in general, it’s hard you could look li…
/r/seduction24/06/21 07:32 PM
15

I think it's less that people cognitively checkout shoes, but it really changes a whole outfit, as well as the confidence you wear it with. Dad jeans with a worn down tshirt and shoes that look like you just finished mowing the lawn with a body posture that says "IDGAF" probably DGAF. Wearing the same pants and shirt but with nicer shoes, can look casually chic, purposeful in dressing down. Wearing the same clothes and white AF air monarchs while standing up tall? You own your shit and are fully…
/r/seduction24/06/21 05:01 PM
3

My honest take: if you are putting this much stock into dating apps you are using them wrong. Dating apps are best used somewhat sparingly as a time pass. Women get so many matches they are overwhelmed you can send a message but don’t get invested. It’s just another social avenue, but it is largely a meat market and women’s choice. If you want to actually meet up with someone then I would recommend generally quickly moving from messaging to date plans. As always if they don’t message back they d…
/r/seduction23/06/21 03:16 PM
4

I think a lot of this is age group driven too. My experience with dating apps for women over the age of about 25 is much better than below.
/r/seduction23/06/21 02:30 PM
1

Honestly I think the biggest thing time at the gym helps you with is confidence. I mean being lean enough helps but beyond that you need to believe in yourself. Sure some people love a big arm. Just like some people love a dad bod or a skinny one.
/r/seduction12/06/21 10:59 PM
5

“If you ever call yourself an alpha, you are a beta”
/r/seduction27/04/21 02:21 PM
1

I formatted as I believe OP intended..... I haven't read it though: Basically, last night, I went over to an old coworkers place to have a couple drinks and catch up. I hadn’t seen her in years, so I was basically gonna get to know her all over again. In the back of my head, I was for sure thinking I was gonna get laid, but when she invited her other friend over, I figured that was off the table(at least for that night). During the time I was over there, I stopped caring about whether I was gonn…
/r/seduction19/03/21 11:06 PM
2

A lot of women want a 5’11” to 6’ tall guy for whatever reason. I guarantee you most of them see someone who is 6’6” or something though and it’s too much (not all obviously).
/r/seduction06/03/21 03:21 PM
12

Depends on the country. I believe the average height for men in the UK off a short google is 5’9”. In the US it’s about the same and a standard deviation is 3 inches (75% of the population is between 5’6” and 6’). I think unfortunately tall (to a point) and attractive are often linked in collective ideals so people think “short for an attractive person” more than short. At the end of the day of course..... it doesn’t matter you make do with what you have.
/r/seduction06/03/21 03:20 PM
23

I think, what you have found is that being appreciated feels good.
/r/seduction26/02/21 04:48 PM
5

Nah man. It’s hard but the sooner you can stop worrying about what the patriarchy expects you to want the better. Back before the pandemic I remember I was in a bar dancing. Had met this cute girl in line. She was 100% my type physically. We had some playful banter. We shared some drinks. I asked if I could kiss her, we kissed we danced. At some point I just told her I’d like to get her number. I told her I wasn’t going to sleep with her that night but I obviously thought she was funny and attra…
/r/seduction22/02/21 07:00 PM
17

I don’t think it really matters at all the gender of the friends, personally.
/r/seduction20/02/21 01:30 AM
5

I don’t post all that often about relationships on social media because like..... why? I also mostly just post nature photos. I think a lot of people use Valentine’s Day as a “hey I do love this person even if I don’t post about them much”. I didn’t do it this year but many do. At the end of the day it really doesn’t matter much. I do often feel like posting about how glorious your life is on social media is just posturing. I jokingly say I don’t post about my relationships because I don’t need …
/r/seduction15/02/21 10:27 PM
9

Your Nice Guy in this anecdote is being a jerk by not being open about what he intends with his friend. It's really kinda simple: honesty is generally your friend. Don't be afraid of rejection, don't be friends with people because you want to sleep with them. You are a person like them talk to them make it known. The intricacies of flirting and such can come from there but that's the starting point.
/r/seduction10/02/21 11:41 PM
13

If you are being nice because you want something from someone, you are kinda being a dick. People (men or women) like people who are actually good people, they don't like people who treat them nice so they can get what they want and get upset when their "niceness" doesn't result in their desired outcome. The whole nice guy platitude is actually guys who are kinda dicks.
/r/seduction10/02/21 11:39 PM
74

Life pro tip: learn how to not be a judgmental cunt. It’s good for your relationships with people period. It’s also surprisingly hard. You have the people who judge you for not being something snd then who do. For the persons judging someone for being promiscuous there is someone judging you for being a prude. For the persons judging your for being vegan there is someone to judge you for eating meat. Religion etc. Different strokes for different folks. I only judge people for being judgmental. W…
/r/seduction29/12/20 01:55 PM
6

This is the way.
/r/seduction27/12/20 03:26 PM
14

I like to think of attraction as three pieces. There’s mental, emotional/spiritual, and physical attraction. You can debate what the labels of the other two are. It doesn’t really matter. They are personality and job socio economic status or whatever. Generally need at least two 7s, although one 9 can do it and nothing below a 5 to be enough. So you might meet a girl and you are a 5 on her physical. She would get with you, but only if you can get to a 7 on her other two measures. When someone di…
/r/seduction26/12/20 08:08 PM
15

You don’t get a girlfriend to pick up a girl. That’s fucked up. If she’s not into you then you just accept it. If she ends up into you just because you are taken then maybe when you move on she’s interested.
/r/seduction10/12/20 09:23 PM
124

Then you move on, she wasn't that interested. Not everyone who has potential to be interested will be.
/r/seduction10/12/20 04:38 PM
3

I think just having a girl who understands and puts no pressure on you can help a ton.
/r/seduction02/12/20 03:04 AM
0

I straight up can’t do the basic tinder hookups personally. Without the connection the sex was shit. That’s not to say tinder has never worked for me but it’s been because we had a conversation a connection snd some degree of comparability. I married my first partner and thought after the divorce I’d just fuck around. I realized quickly that unless the person was pretty compatible certain things just would not happen for me.
/r/seduction02/12/20 03:01 AM
3

For me, it was lessening my performances overall take away on the whole performance. Ie lots of foreplay, going down on her, etc That and just being open like “hey I can be nervous during first encounters” helped me a lot. I was straight up worried I was having serious ED up until recently.
/r/seduction02/12/20 02:57 AM
46

I think he meant blank but instead wrote about racism.
/r/seduction25/11/20 02:33 PM
13

I think the best way to find a good relationship is rarely to seek it. Instead of looking for a relationship date with an open mind and it unfolding into more. Find people with the same mindset. It builds the best relationships where people just really want to be with each other. The whole world of trying to lock down a relationship snd only that is full of people looking for something every bit as toxic as some of those who just want to fuck around. There is nothing inherently wrong with wantin…
/r/seduction03/11/20 10:41 PM
1

Lol.
/r/seduction29/10/20 09:06 PM
7

I was wondering like.... why are these people shaking hands? I mean I've done a hug.... but usually just like greet with a smile and openness. I dont shake hands with my friends either that's weird.
/r/seduction29/10/20 03:56 PM
3

You guys shake hands when meeting someone for the first time on a date?
/r/seduction29/10/20 03:55 PM
5

I've been facing a similar dillema, and mine is perhaps a bit different. I was married to my high school sweetheart, 9 year relationship never really considered anything different. Then it shattered (no cheating) but I realized that she hadn't been happy for years and just did everything to make me happy. It made it real hard to commit fearing that you would do so and fully invest and then.... rip. Ironically getting into books like models and seduction and investing in myself helped a lot. I ha…
/r/seduction14/10/20 05:06 PM
2

Don’t talk about things you hate on a first date. Positivity is good. Negativity isn’t attractive.
/r/seduction05/10/20 03:25 AM
2

The problem with being nice is when you are nice instead of expressing yourself. Don't be an asshole and be genuine.
/r/seduction23/09/20 04:16 PM
16

I broke up with someone once because I loved them and could see she was miserable being with me. That was shitty but you know what she’s happy now. The person she wanted me to be in order to be happy wasn’t me, but she also didn’t want to do the breaking up so I had to do it. Love isn’t about making yourself feel good. Lots of guys are here trying to complete themselves and make them selves feel good through emotional attachment. You got to be good for yourself and just enable partners to be hap…
/r/seduction16/08/20 05:28 PM
6

I think we are in agreement here. It's nuanced. I mean there are lots of women who totally avoid going outside alone after dark and such. I know my ex had a few bars she refused to go to without driving with someone else because the walk was too dark. It's a real thing, and your risk of being sexually assaulted is much higher than being hit by a bus. Obviously different people have different perceived levels of risk and different risk tolerance.
/r/seduction10/08/20 09:10 PM
8

Well it can actually prevent harm in many instances too, it’s a functional shortcut of the brain which creates bias. Ie women who avoid men also avoid predatory men. There is no other particularly common demoninator. If you want to avoid those interactions you avoid men. Simple as that. So yes we as men need to be better. I’m not saying you can’t approach women or find them sexy but you do need to be more conscientious sometimes. You can’t just get mad at women for being upset about it. Unlike s…
/r/seduction10/08/20 08:16 PM
24

Stereotyping is also human nature. Doesn’t make it right but it’s natural for humans to have bad interactions and form associations with them then avoid people who match that. If you have enough creepy interactions with men (which girls get quite a few of from a young age), it is natural to form barriers against all men. Clumping is useful although not right.
/r/seduction10/08/20 06:48 PM
1

I don’t see much difference between the two. My point is that sometimes people are making the most effort they can with what they have going on. I’ve certainly had times in my life where it’s not that I’m not interested it’s that I’m completely exhausted from work/school/whatever is going on in life. Sometimes meeting people is a matter of timing. I’m not saying to wait for them but if you keep them in play while still searching for whatever you are looking for and being willing to latch on to s…
/r/seduction09/08/20 01:38 PM
2

Through not around. You can’t clutch to things but you need to acknowledge and experience them to some extent. This is more for the emotion stuff. Hung up on a girl your liked, but also being sad, being hurt, being in love. The ability to have and process emotion without becoming overwhelmed and without bottling it up. I highly recommend meditation. It’s clinically proven to alter ways certain parts of the brain. It helps you to accept and move through things. It can have sizable benefits outsid…
/r/seduction09/08/20 10:02 AM
1

Not totally the case in this instance but generally true. As is the case typically “it’s complicated”. Generally though it can be anything. Sometimes when a girl says she is busy she really is. Sometimes busy is just not interested and sometimes it really is busy. If you are interested give space come back later.
/r/seduction09/08/20 04:46 AM
2

“It depends” I like to have some conversation but not too much. We all know if you meet a girl where you fit really well you don’t really run out of things to talk about. Shoot, I always married and saw the same person everyday and we always had something to talk about. That said, if you just want to fuck around a bit you aren’t trying to find your life partner. You need to be able to have a conversation but it doesn’t need to be like.... fireworks non stop etc.
/r/seduction08/08/20 10:32 PM
10

You know what’s worse than ghosting when she says she had a great time would love to see you again but then just become far far less responsive and non comittal.
/r/seduction08/08/20 10:29 PM
2

Same to an extent. Fortunately dated a social worker for a while, helped set me straight.
/r/seduction07/08/20 02:40 PM
3

Which is a by product of a patriarchal society which has told men that having emotions is bad. Teaching boys and men how to handle (and experience) their emotions so they don't all eventually just come out as bottled rage and anger. You can't truly not experience emotions.
/r/seduction07/08/20 01:27 PM
1

Self assessment is the key.
/r/seduction07/08/20 01:23 PM
26

It doesn’t matter. She’s not interested it’s not going to work out. You being your most authentic self didn’t do it for her. It would have been a shitty time. “What did I do wrong?” Is just asking how you can alter yourself and not be authentic to you in order to attract someone.... assuming you’ve taken the steps to build yourself into a happy fulfilled person. Which is step 1.
/r/seduction07/08/20 04:32 AM
25

I think if most guys were well educated on feminism they might actually be for it.
/r/seduction07/08/20 04:30 AM
2

It’s not bad, they use a dizzying algorithm go get a number value based on the ratings you’ve gotten so esters who tend to rate high or low have less certainty I believe. The algorithm seems to be built to stop this sort of rating blasting. You can also select specific demographics.
/r/seduction26/07/20 01:31 PM
0

You miss a point which is at the very beginning and forming of attraction. Generally women hold the cards in picking partners and men hold the cards in staying with them. Once she gets to know you yes you are right if you provide that in a way that is right for her she will be engaged with you. Capturing the initial engagement though requires some degree of investment from her. To start with women are selective though. Guys who are overly available and into them can come off as desperate (unattr…
/r/seduction23/07/20 02:50 PM
7

Touch is a barrier that is touchy though, baristas don't touch customers for tips usually. It's a pretty strong boundary.
/r/seduction22/07/20 02:08 PM
13

Having ego isn’t bad having too big of one is. This only works if you actually work hard to make sure you have value and then respect yourself appropriately
/r/seduction03/07/20 01:02 PM
4

Work on building the deep connections with friends.
/r/seduction09/06/20 05:29 AM
7

Some reading, but largely just my own experience. It started when I realized I always had women interested in me when I had a GF but not when I didn’t. Had to figure out what was different. I didn’t need anything and I was wholly authentic when I was dating someone else. Then just learning how to harness that.
/r/seduction02/06/20 05:37 AM
27

There are two pieces here and they aren’t mutually exclusive. First you need to be authentic and need to not be desperate. People can smell desperate from miles away. That doesn’t mean you can’t find people attractive and be interested and express it. It means you can’t have that “I’m counting on this I need this”. Live your best life and try to not need girls. The irony here is that guys with more options gets more options. It’s simple human psychology and it goes either way, what other people …
/r/seduction02/06/20 01:03 AM
13

Don’t workout to get women, workout for yourself and in turn get women. If you don’t want to be an active healthy person that’s ok, I don’t think it’s the best life choice. You may not even get skinny or super fit your body might resist that. Be the best person you can be for you and other people will respect that.
/r/seduction31/05/20 03:27 PM
21

I think the thing with dating apps is it fundamentally doesn't resemble normal dating experiences or humanity. It's a game of having good pictures and some quick wit oftentimes. There is no ability to talk with body language and your behavior it's just a fundamentally different way a meeting people with less factors and a whole lot of noise. Additionally for many the dating app game can kill self confidence. Going through hundreds of girls and not getting a single match is demoralizing. At one p…
/r/seduction18/05/20 09:51 PM
1

she is just feeling that she COULD be if you don’t fuck it up. The more you try to talk over tinder / DM / whatever the more likely you are to fuck it up so get to the date ASAP. I stopped reading here. I mean on one hand OLD just kinda sucks, on the other hand, it has nothing to do with fucking it up and generally if you can't keep a conversation the in person conversation will probably be dry and shitty too. I mean if you are just looking to smash, that's fine, but if you want anything beyond …
/r/seduction27/04/20 04:58 PM
2

I agree. My only point was that attractive people are used to being told how attractive they are. Telling someone who is a 10 they have really pretty eyes as an opening might not work as well as it would with someone else.
/r/seduction23/04/20 02:22 PM
1

Although the really attractive ones will often be more interested in a good conversation than a compliment. Treat people in a way that stands out from their usual.
/r/seduction22/04/20 08:55 PM
7

There was actually a study which showed men rated big muscles as more attractive than women did, was interesting. The bottom line is for both men and women being compassionate and funny are usually the two most attractive traits. You might be able to get fit and pickup some girls at the club but you aren’t going to keep them by being self obsessed.
/r/seduction08/04/20 05:28 PM
47

I think for guys.... we just need to work on being true to ourselves and care less about the “masculinity” and “femininity” we have (these are by and large social constructs). Yeah like maybe there is some middle that attracts the most women, but it’s not about getting the most women it’s about getting the women who are most attracted to you and the only way to do that is to be your best self. A woman can be a 10 to me physically and open her mouth and spew vacuous bullshit and I’d be completely…
/r/seduction08/04/20 01:34 PM
1

You are worrying to much. It either works out or it doesn’t. Not talking to someone ever doesn’t make them like you more. Number one rule of this whole game is to not be scared. You can’t put too much weight on the outcome.
/r/seduction07/04/20 02:02 PM
3

There is actually research showing women are less lonely outside of relationships than men. The main theory of why is because women tend to have better close relationships. I notice a lot of guys who have half their relationships built on finding girls. Don't be that person, build close strong relationships with emotional connections with your friends (I don't care if they are guys or girls). When you have a relationship don't throw that away either! There is this broken thing in society where m…
/r/seduction06/04/20 05:34 PM
6

You act differently when you are seeing someone it's simple as that. You don't act like you are interested in or looking for something.
/r/seduction05/04/20 05:59 AM
1

Just sent this to my ex, but we are just friends and have been texting anyways haha.
/r/seduction25/03/20 10:44 PM
1

I think it's more than people to date. That is where people fuck up, you just run into people. Oftentimes you meet the best people or the interesting ones when you stop trying to date. You meet some dude who will be a wing man or a girl you were just talking to turns out to be interested, but if you approach it as making connections and those sometimes turn into opportunities for friendship or more: A) you end up less creepy and B) you are much less likely to be dissuaded by an awkward interacti…
/r/seduction24/02/20 06:37 AM
1

The leading theory is that women have better closer friendships outside of relationships than men Do ok average. We should defy social norms and built high quality friend groups outside of our relationships. You know how you often see women out on the town for a night with friends not necessarily looking for something but a group of single dudes are usually eyes peeled for someone to hook up with. It’s not hard to see how those females are less lonely. Companionship is companionship. On the flip…
/r/seduction21/02/20 03:52 PM
3

https://www.google.com/search?q=alpha+male+definition the dominant male animal in a particular group. "two of them trotted over to greet the alpha male, a black wolf with a graying muzzle" a man tending to assume a dominant or domineering role in social or professional situations. "two alpha males constantly competing to be the best"
/r/seduction21/02/20 04:11 AM
5

Again alpha just isn’t a thing. It’s a term taken from a study on wolf behaviors that has since been debunked. (And it literally mean to be dominant and lead) The term is overloaded and often viewed to be being over the top loaded with toxic masculinity. It’s just a problematic term. What you are describing is good but again overloaded poor descriptor. Say the traits you want not two giant buckets that have no meaning.
/r/seduction21/02/20 04:03 AM
3

I never said it’s the only thing you need. Just saying that it is generally true. And an alpha just isn’t a thing.
/r/seduction21/02/20 03:57 AM
5

But most people here alpha and think that they need to become someone toxic. The whole terminology is fucked up and mired in bad psychology.
/r/seduction21/02/20 02:45 AM
20

This just in people don't like spending time with people who hate themselves and are needy generally. This has nothing to do with being beta or alpha, people like spending time with self actualized individuals.
/r/seduction20/02/20 10:50 PM
2

Why do women spend so much time and effort on their appearance? This one... no. Women put time and effort into their appearance because they like looking good. The rest, yeah because they want to find a good person. But actually statistically women are less lonely when single than men. There was a study on this. Women are lonelier in marriage and less lonely than men outside of it.
/r/seduction20/02/20 10:49 PM
0

Punishment only works until someone hasn’t been punished recently. And I’m not being punished by downvotes I just see people disagree. There is literally no harm done. Punishments lose effectiveness the more they are used and are most effective in situations where followed quickly by a reward for positive behaivior. Really my point is stop trying to train your SO. You want a deep nourishing connection with someone don’t treat them like a child or a dog. We might be able to theoretically classify…
/r/seduction05/02/20 04:06 PM
3

Then the real part of having “game” is recognizing they are interested and not being an idiot about that. Pretty sure I still suck at that. Oh well. At the end of the day I’ve built myself a better life and there is a lot more to it than getting girls.
/r/seduction05/02/20 03:17 AM
-1

Punish is just the wrong term here. Cause and effect is not punishment. “the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense.” Not having sex isn’t a penalty or retribution it’s just an undesired outcome. The food doesn’t punish you by burning your mouth because you ate it when it was too hot. That’s a simple negative outcome. Punishment requires intent, it needs to be inflicted or imposed. Not to mention the whole withholding thing which makes sex an object that can be given…
/r/seduction05/02/20 01:35 AM
-1

witholding sex I hate this term. Does she owe you sex? She doesn't want to have sex with you because you haven't made her feel comfortable sexy or whatever other reason. If you use your words and communicate and understand why she doesn't want to have sex with you, then you can do something to change it. Also not wanting to have sex isn't the sole provenance of women.
/r/seduction05/02/20 01:03 AM
1

Words are clear all the rest open to interpretation.
/r/seduction05/02/20 12:59 AM
2

Words... words are how you communicate "hey sometimes when you do X I feel Y, just want to make sure you are aware of that", "I really love it when you X"
/r/seduction05/02/20 12:11 AM
5

Fun fact... punishment doesn't really work in conditioning whether with dogs or people. Also don't try to classically condition people that's manipulative.
/r/seduction05/02/20 12:09 AM
105

Love Mark Manson's stuff, hate reading about techniques. No technique solves the fact that you are a boring person without basic compassion.
/r/seduction05/02/20 12:08 AM
1

I’ve definitely not felt chemistry with someone it’s no big deal. I’m a chemistry person. I’ve had girls I feel lots of attractive things to be hard now and women I’m not that attracted to initially become definite yes after some conversation. Clicking conversationally for me personally means more than physical attraction
/r/seduction02/02/20 06:19 AM
26

Also not a replacement for friends but yeah I like myself and still miss having a partner often times 🤷‍♀️. The key here though is that when we are desperate for a partner we tend to accept anyone for a partner.
/r/seduction29/01/20 04:08 PM
3

Admittedly who I am attracted to becomes more open after some alcohol, and a good conversation. Attraction is more than physical and how you feel about someone physically can change based off of the other stuff too.
/r/seduction15/01/20 11:39 PM
1

Boulder CO and yeah I’m pretty sure. I don’t care much I don’t really use it.
/r/seduction15/01/20 05:10 PM
1

Wow there is a lot of assumptions in here. I wear nice clothes not to attract people but because I like they way I look. Most women I know would tell you the same thing. They don't wear the clothes they wear for you they wear them because they like how they look in them. I'd argue women typically care more about their clothing and appearance than most men not because they are "insecure at their core" as the comment below says. It's because as a society we have told and continue to tell women the…
/r/seduction15/01/20 04:54 PM
1

How are you trying to change your brain/actions?
/r/seduction15/01/20 04:22 PM
0

I think my height is one of the biggest things holding me back I'm 5'7" 135lb. I'm not big but I used to race bicycles very competitively and run. Generally a skinny person but with some muscle definition. Getting big would frankly look weird on my body. I have to shop for european skinny fit clothes and still wear an extra small most of the time and I have a 28 waist so I'm just very lean. I'm also weird in that I'm attracted to good conversation more than anything else. I'm sorry but if you ar…
/r/seduction15/01/20 04:21 PM
2

Well I don't get tinder matches so probably not.
/r/seduction15/01/20 02:58 PM
4

For sure, I'm relatively fit and decently attractive, albeit shorter (169cm, 5'7" in freedom units). Based on feedback I've gotten I'm a 7 or so.
/r/seduction15/01/20 05:46 AM
62

This is how I generally go about meeting women is just dress well take care of myself be myself and I do remarkably little flirting. I won't say it's magic and I bed a ton of women but generally when I do get a date it goes well, and because I don't care much I seem to attract women and people in general, and to me that is the real goal. Be an attractive person.
/r/seduction15/01/20 01:41 AM
1

There was a study I saw recently about what women are attracted to in men. Basically men thing men who are big are the most attractive but it’s more about being ripped. You don’t need to be big but being fit and lean enough to see the muscle you do have is good
/r/seduction07/01/20 04:05 PM
2

I’ve never understood this obsession with people being a day older when most civilized countries have ages of consent below 18. If you follow the half your age plus 7 rule he shouldn’t see anyone below 20 though. Back to OPs point being a high schooler interested in some 26 isn’t likely to workout unless you are just looking for sex. There is just such a huge difference in where you are in life. It certainly depends on the person and there circumstances but people long term tend to work out with…
/r/seduction27/12/19 02:24 PM
2

I am! I’m moving abroad next year and have been using my freedom to travel a bunch.
/r/seduction12/12/19 09:26 PM
4

I’m 26 just got divorced from my high school sweetheart who has decided she is poly. It fucking blows man. I have no game because I have no experience. I’m objectively decently attractive but as they say being a stud is much more difficult than being a slut. The irony is the divorce is finalized tomorrow and I think my ex went through a phase and is now over it. I’m waiting for her to come back any day now so I can say no. #notbitteratall
/r/seduction12/12/19 06:52 PM
1

I mean a shower plus good cologne and spending 30 seconds on your hair does make you more attractive.
/r/seduction09/12/19 08:28 PM
8

I’m shortish and naturally just a thin build. Fit for me looks pretty lean because huge muscles on a small body is both a clothing nightmere and I just don’t like the look for me personally. At the end of the day though I basically I look like a twink when I dress decently. So much gay attention. At least it is flattering.
/r/seduction08/12/19 03:52 PM
5

You absolutely need to break out of your comfort zone and if just doing that is do it. But he is right about talking people. Going out and then trying to pickup girls and making approaches next is a recipe for disaster. The next step is just socializing. Funny thing even just running 0 game when you get good at socializing you will get some random people’s phone numbers. The trick from there and what I’m working on is how to remain authentic and non needy like you come off as when just being fri…
/r/seduction07/12/19 03:56 PM
14

Reminds be of a Instagram meme I saw recently that said the only time women want to be controlled or suffocated is during sex.
/r/seduction25/11/19 02:59 PM
1

I’ve done it and told my SOs they can do it in any relationships they have and it’s partially just because it’s nice to feel desired on both ends. I’d rather my partner choose to be with me everyday than start because they think they have no other options. I also think it’s kinda hot knowing that you are chosen over all the other people interested in them.
/r/seduction24/11/19 06:01 PM
1

People in relationships flirt all the time it’s fun. It’s harmless acting beyond that isn’t.
/r/seduction24/11/19 03:20 PM
1

I’m in a smallish city and this bar is only karaoke on Wednesdays and it is packed with college students and grad students. I love it, but I haven’t seen anywhere else quite like it.
/r/seduction21/11/19 10:12 PM
3

I think karaoke is awesome because people just enjoy it and put themselves out there. From what I’ve heard and what I feel being authentically yourself is super attractive and I think people do that singing karaoke. This one near me is great mostly college seniors and grad students. People singing songs from their childhood the whole crowd into it.
/r/seduction21/11/19 03:22 PM
4

I think the issue is that SOME men flip the fuck out when this happens throw insults etc. Don’t be that guy. That guy makes it so the other is just going to ghost from now on.
/r/seduction21/11/19 02:41 PM
1

Challenge accepted!
/r/seduction13/11/19 07:15 PM
1

Yeah for sure right now I’ve just been working on having an attitude of abundance. I’m not really flirting right now just being myself and getting comfortable with that will work into flirting more. I know being proactive is important right now just trying to work on being attractive and non needy. I talk to women let them decide if they like me and then sometimes by the end of the night they give me their number. Sometimes I’m not really interested beyond that conversation but this one was cute…
/r/seduction13/11/19 04:43 PM
4

You shouldn’t be trying to avoid comfort. You avoid complacency. You can consciously know younger making comfortable decisions and not be complacent , complacency comes only if you are scared to leave that comfort.
/r/seduction13/11/19 09:36 AM
1

Tried that quickly turned into poly because partner found sex meant feelings.
/r/seduction12/11/19 03:51 AM
1

The problem with promising you won't develop feelings is that it's real fucking hard to control when you develop feelings. Some degree of comfort is required to have a good sexual connection. It's why I always say about people who talk about someone cheating "emotionally" . You can't control your feelings only your actions. So do you realize you started falling for someone and then just stop the sex? That's hard too.
/r/seduction11/11/19 11:43 PM
1

So I agree on the nonconsensual power games in monogamy also being bad. For me, having tried poly. It's simply a matter of time. I've got a job, hobbies, friends. Building and maintaining relationships requires time and effort. I have to make time to have one good one. If I had two I'd be half assing 2 relationships. My ex who is poly just doesn't have as substantial of relationships and when they get rough she finds new ones. I think poly CAN be toxic in that way, it's often easier to try somet…
/r/seduction11/11/19 11:40 PM
10

Open relationships poly are things. The problem is most guys seem to want to have sex with lots of people but their girl to have just them. Jealousy is a bitch
/r/seduction11/11/19 07:06 PM
21

Really depends where you are! I'm parts of the US ifeel normal shortish at 5'7". In other areas just short. In the Netherlands or Denmark I'm definitely short.
/r/seduction17/10/19 07:31 PM
2

There is a tendency to get in a good thing and thing you have it made. As a divorced guy I'll say you never have it made. Sure you don't have to search or whatever but you always need to work on yourself and the relationship. It's not necessarily less work, it's different though.
/r/seduction13/10/19 07:39 PM
13

Fuck yes isn't a fuck yes for everything. I've had people where fuck yes I'll hook up with them .... And no don't really want anything more than that. I've got people who are fuck yeses for just friends, and I've had some fuck yeses for relationships. It also needs to be a fuck yes on both sides.
/r/seduction11/10/19 04:38 PM
135

The "I don't call guys" line and the general "I won't return calls even when I say I will" is really annoying. The real lesson here is generally speaking if a girl wasn't responding or whatever she probably isn't worth your time. Improve yourself and move on, can't do anything else. Or as I believe I've seen a couple people say "if it isn't a fuck yes, it is a no"
/r/seduction11/10/19 03:26 PM
6

But like piano with a little work you can become good enough to impress.
/r/seduction07/10/19 02:37 PM
5

Good for him, a couple early wins help keep ya motivated
/r/seduction06/10/19 03:02 PM
2

I don't know about most... But sure many do. If nothing else most people drink when in college. House parties make that easy. The real problem here is you are allowed to drive at such a young age. The 21 age limit is supposed to avoid teenagers driving drunk. Personally.. I think the real issue is teenagers driving but what do I know.
/r/seduction06/10/19 02:55 PM
2

A couple drinks help too. I'm working on doing this when less intoxicated. Drunk I've never met someone who isn't a friend. Sober though... ooof anxiety.
/r/seduction04/10/19 11:12 PM
3

At least she didn't cry on your couch for an hour.... True story of the time I got a girl to my place and didn't have sex. I'm a nice person, we talked about what she had going on in life. Why she was having issues etc and I drove her home. But yeah was NOT expecting that one.
/r/seduction04/10/19 11:10 PM
4

Note: there is a difference between being confident and being cocky or an asshole.
/r/seduction25/09/19 05:58 PM
20

The reason why I'm addressing this is because women all prefer dominant guys who can make decisions for them. I don't agree. I think this is true for many if not most women around certain subjects, but it is not true of all women. Similarly in BDSM most doms are men.... but not all. That said even with those women suggestions are probably better. It isn't about being dominant, it's about being confident. A question to ask a question is meek, just say what you want. Be polite but assertive and co…
/r/seduction20/09/19 11:57 PM
9

Your response is incredible..... but paragraphs are your friend.
/r/seduction20/09/19 11:48 PM
1

I am desperate. This is likely your problem. In my experience desperation is obvious. Those who are confident and don't need women get a lot of them and the desperate ones get nada. I mean no one NEEDS women. Be comfortable in your skin, be comfortable in who you are and then go out not deperate see a cute girl and go for the approach. As someone who is new to this whole thing: start working on this with not girls you want to hookup with. Start by grabbing some drinks at a bar and making friends…
/r/seduction13/09/19 10:02 PM
2

Many other countries don't really drive cars, and a number of them don't really have a big concept of a date.
/r/seduction01/09/19 05:14 PM
21

Well that's cool, it's my default most of the winter. That or a T-shirt with a sport coat. Floral button ups all summer though, it's hot here.
/r/seduction01/09/19 05:07 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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