| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 29 | "My bf doesn't do foreplay so I cOmmUnicated, countless times, but he won't change... why?!"I am so glad I have managed to find one that puts my gratification so high on his list. There's no way I would deal with bullshit ike this again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/20 02:40 PM |
| 44 | I started making lunchboxes. I always wanted to and couldn' wait to have a partner/children, so I can express my love this way. Just recently I realized that I already have a loved one, that I can make food for! (And who will always appreciate it) It's silly but it never came to my head before :DYou can try lining with clingwrap before putting the lid on for those dishes you're more worried about spillage with. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/10/20 09:56 PM |
| 101 | I came across this in another subreddit. I am curious what do you think about it?I think his parents have raised a very thoughtful young man. Unless he was self-promoting as "look what I did to make all these girls feel special!", it seems he had a "wouldn't it be nice" thought and actually followed through, which is what we want. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 07:03 PM |
| 27 | It’s always the best ones, isn’t it? 🤣🤣🤣What tf does that even mean?? "I'm a good guy because at least I'm honest that you'll never be enough?" Ok, loser...smh | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 02:11 PM |
| 2 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 1 2020I wish you luck in love!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 01:10 AM |
| 3 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 1 2020Honestly, I don't remember asking what they were looking for. I worked under the assumption that they're either trying to find a partner or a hookup. If what you want is the same thing, it'll just happen. You'll either mesh or you won't. You or he could literally say anything you want to answer this, but it doesn't mean it's the truth. Actions are truth. If he wants a serious relationship, he'll treat it seriously. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 08:12 PM |
| 31 | When a LVM tries to drop this hot line to reel you in thinking you are a pickme, but you decide to play stupid to give him a taste of his own medicine before you block & delete for good as an enlightened QueenHilarious!! Whenever I hear the term "Dom" I think of the actor Dom Deluise. TIL from my random Google search thanks to this post that there is a restaurant that has a sub named after Dom. https://www.lioniheroes.com/menu #46 (I'm on a computer instead of mobile so insert laughing emojis here lol) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 08:04 PM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 1 2020"I'm looking for dependability and trust." These are basic tenets of any relationship, not just romantic. But a guy that is only looking for something casual will NOT like the word dependable. "I'm looking for someone who deserves my time and attention." Using the word deserve lets them know you have standards; again, a guy that is only looking for something casual doesn't want you to have standards; or, he'll stick with it for a little since he feels in competition with your standards and wants… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 07:29 PM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 1 2020I believe they recommend dating multiple men so that you don't get too fixated on one and put everything into him. Back in my dating days, I realized my memory didn't allow for more than 2 at once; it was very hard for me to keep up with personal details when there were too many. But I was able to stay emotionally distant as long as I didn't have sex. If you know you are able to stay emotionally distant until you can continue to vet each one, you're fine. The point is to do what YOU'RE comfortab… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 07:17 PM |
| 17 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered September 1 2020Anyway, his case of wandering eye depresses me This is your answer. If what he's doing makes you feel anything less than amazing, be done with him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 07:07 PM |
| 17 | the only appropriate response to when you hear someone say this 😂I'm in Texas too, and I've definitely heard of women who are only allowed to come to Zumba to work out because the husbands assume it's only women there. I asked a lady if she wanted to meet at Planet Fitness another day, and she said she wasn't allowed to work out anyplace else. I was like whhhhaaaa?? I've also been told how it's "nice that your husband lets you do theater. Mine would be never let me be that close to other men." Umm he doesn't "let" me do shit. This is my hobby. We may have to … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 06:57 PM |
| 0 | If your man looks at other women, he’s willing to cheat on youI think we are basically agreeing, the difference is in how we interpreted the OP. I translated "look at" to "be attracted to", while others are translating it to neck-snapping ogling or him actively saying something. No, I would never tolerate blatant disrespect and neither should anyone else. But to think that he is never attracted to another female is delusional. I find other people attractive, so maybe I'm the odd woman out in that.. I've objectified plenty of men lol. The health of a relati… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 05:38 PM |
| 4 | If your man looks at other women, he’s willing to cheat on youThis. If it's something that's constantly done, or in any way that makes YOU feel uncomfortable, drop his ass. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 01:52 PM |
| 1 | If your man looks at other women, he’s willing to cheat on youLet me just laugh at being called a pickme lol. No, I would not accept my husband "ogling" other women or commenting in a flirtatious way. But I'm not threatened by another woman's beauty; if I think she's pretty, chances are he does too. I am confident in his feelings for me. I'm not worried about him cheating because he'd be a fucking idiot to. If another woman can pull him away, she can have him. Edit to add: Not once in our relationship has my husband made me feel other than the most amazing… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 01:19 PM |
| 3 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!I love that! One of my big fears is that we will somehow lose the playfulness and intimacy that we have. I love to see and hear about long-term couples still loving on each other, and am really hopeful we can be one too! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/20 03:12 PM |
| 7 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!Thank you! It was especially fitting because we were waiting on our daughter's COVID results (negative!) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 07:14 PM |
| 11 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!Oh no!! Now I have to admit it was on plenty of fish (don't judge lol). I would be much more leery of online dating now, but for me at that time, it was my best assurance that I was going for compatibility instead of sexual chemistry. My pattern had been attraction, sex, relationship, THEN try to make the relationship work. I liked the idea of OLD because I could easily tell intelligence levels, shared interests, etc. and knew I'd be pickier. Plus as a single mom of two toddlers I didn't want to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 07:11 PM |
| 17 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!Maybe a little, but I don't mind lol ;) Better than the type of obsessed I've had in the past! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 06:59 PM |
| 13 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!I hope you find a partner you deserve! Until then, be your own unicorn!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 06:57 PM |
| 14 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!Yes yes yes!!! I love that you've got one too!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 06:56 PM |
| 18 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their partner up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!I wondered after posting if anyone was going to take offense to that lol. It was after something had hit his shin at work. He says things bump into him all the time and he didn't think twice about it other than it feeling bruised, until he was at home modeling some new shorts for me with these really exaggerated poses. He stood wrong or something and it started hurting more. So then he was slightly worried that it was fractured after all. He had wanted to get an X-ray to make sure, but no place … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 06:55 PM |
| 2 | Some texts from my husband. After receiving this morning's texts, I just wanted to show that there ARE men who love to build their woman up! 8 years together, and he still goes out of his way to make me feel adored. It may seem hopeless, but HVM do exist!Thanks for pointing that out! I'll edit and repost :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 02:42 PM |
| 19 | I better get my clown makeup on 🤡But now you know! Deep down a man knows he's supposed to be a provider. The character needed to even take money from a woman is questionable, let alone someone he's only known 2 weeks. A. He shouldn't have to borrow money simply for 2 week's of lost hours, you deserve someone at a better place financially. B. IF he actually needed money, he should have family/friends/a freaking personal loan to help him out with that. I won't even take money when it's offered from anyone because I have self-resp… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 07:23 PM |
| 26 | I better get my clown makeup on 🤡Then it's a good thing you're here. Stop it now!!! Even if you've already said you would, you literally owe him NOTHING!! We are allowed to change our minds after we realize we made a mistake | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 07:13 PM |
| 33 | I better get my clown makeup on 🤡How can he possibly come to the mindset that YOU owe HIM money?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 07:11 PM |
| 20 | Regardless of commitment status.Our house is very much run with a "happy wife, happy life" motto, and I'm not hating it :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 02:24 AM |
| 143 | "we talk all the time at work so let's keep doing that" 💀💀I remember reading this thread, and at least a lot of the comments mentioned an appreciation of the fact that this was straightforward and honest but not rude or insulting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 06:59 PM |
| 9 | “I don’t have a child”I made them show me their licenses on the first date. Of course they could cover up the address portion, but I wanted to see their picture matching a date of birth. The ones that laughed or smirked at my sense of safety didn't get second dates. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 04:43 PM |
| 1 | Why being attracted to men feels like a mental diaorderI want to know the saying! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/08/20 06:41 PM |
| 10 | Why being attracted to men feels like a mental diaorderI work on the "nose" theory. I've had my share, and when I thought back after learning the size of their feet and hands had NOTHING to do, I realized that all of the larger guys had a more straight, stronger looking nose. The smaller guys tended to have more rounded noses. The ones with noses that were more wide than sticking out tended to be the smallest. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/08/20 01:48 PM |
| 4 | What are some the embarassing things you’ve done as a pickmeisha that you promise you won’t ever do it again, now that FDS has taught you better?Most definitely never again! This was about 10 years ago. I "leveled up" mentally about 6 months after this; I had recognized a pattern within myself and did not want to do it anymore. I met my husband 8 years ago and have enjoyed a loving, healthy, and supportive relationship ever since then :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 07:09 PM |
| 11 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered July 23 2020They call you innocent because they get off on making you not innocent. It's a way to neg you. Your line of thinking is supposed to feel challenged enough for you to then go to "I"ll show you I'm not so innocent!!" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 06:41 PM |
| 9 | What are some the embarassing things you’ve done as a pickmeisha that you promise you won’t ever do it again, now that FDS has taught you better?Pawned all of my halfway decent jewelry to be able to put the cash deposit on a rental car in order to go visit him. I will never forget the look of humor on his face when he found that out...he even yelled it out to his roommate so he'd get a load of what "this chick did for me." Before I even got there though, I had to drive around for a little bit to wait for his ex to leave because he didn't want her knowing I was there. He went out a lot per our previous phone conversations but would not ta… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 05:59 PM |
| 12 | What are some the embarassing things you’ve done as a pickmeisha that you promise you won’t ever do it again, now that FDS has taught you better?This is a thing!?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 05:40 PM |
| 43 | Reminder: You are NOT "too much."During our dating time I let my husband know that I was the sort that didn't sit still well...I've got too many goals and aspirations and if he was the sort who wanted "someone at home" he's be sorely disappointed in me. His response was something to the effect of "aren't all amazing and successful women that way?" Another time I was a little emotional about something, can't even remember what, but I apologized "for being a crazy bitch." He told me never to refer to myself that way again, that I… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 05:25 PM |
| 25 | Run sister run!My first thought is that he couldn't take the 5-10 minutes to pick up the room he's in before playing his game? Then I saw what game he was actually playing and nooooope.... my husband is a "gamer" but never these hostile, overly violent games. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 05:17 PM |
| 31 | My co-worker asked me out?You recently started this job? Is it a job that has more males than females? I have often worked in areas where I'm one of only a few females and I have noticed that when there is a "new girl" there is often an attempt to see who "will get her." I would think an HVM would know that it is not professional to date coworkers. Not saying that two people that work together can't eventually forge a relationship, but it is very telling that you're a new employee and he's trying to go there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 05:09 PM |
| 3 | breaking mom and TikToks are my birth control 😬As someone who had two unexpected pregnancies because the bastard told me he had had a vasectomy.... I don't know how you could avoid it if he wanted to lie about it other than asking to see the op note. That's what made me realize he had lied that WHOLE TIME. I thought my son was some miracle baby, but when I got pregnant again only 1 month after no longer breastfeeding, I told him he needed to get the medical records because somebody didn't do something right. His response? "I coulda sworn....… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/20 12:42 AM |
| 2 | My ex made me feel sooo crazy for not wanting his female “bestie” to constantly touch him and say ily to him. It’s good to know I wasn’t crazy and my boundaries are valid.Well mine has communication issues about his feelings lol. I can literally remember one heart to heart where I had to explain that females want to talk things out, and that no woman worth her salt was going to settle for a dumb log while she's standing there TRYING. He said he gets locked up and so scared of saying the wrong thing, he thought not saying anything was better. I was like nooooo it's respectful communication plus ACTION. We don't like to repeat ourselves. Don't be a dumb log, dude. … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 09:41 PM |
| 59 | My ex made me feel sooo crazy for not wanting his female “bestie” to constantly touch him and say ily to him. It’s good to know I wasn’t crazy and my boundaries are valid.I am a female best friend. We do not hold hands. We do not message each other beyond catching up on life's happenings. We do not discuss relationship details like I might with my female friends. When we hang out, there is a hug upon greeting just like with all my friends, but it is apparent to anyone with a brain that we interact like a brother and sister because that's how we feel about each other. It's ok if a guy claims a woman as his best friend, but the actions will show if they're actually… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 03:02 PM |
| 22 | When you call him out and he calls you crazyOmg I just flashbacked to being called "one of those women that wants to get hit" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 02:48 PM |
| 9 | Tinder LingoIt's been some time since dating apps for me (actually met my husband on pof though, don't judge lol) but I would change "like style and elegance" to- wants you to look pretty for me while I'm sitting in greasy tracksuit lol Your post reminded of all the stupid profile pictures of half naked men in the bathroom throwing a deuce sign. Which reminds me, maybe add... "pic in bathroom"- I do not own my own home, or I live with my girlfriend and can only take pictures here | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 02:35 PM |
| 22 | “Real men get vasectomies!”Dr Anthony Youn.Yes!! My husband and I decided on him having a vasectomy over me having a tubal very quickly after doing research on both. Even my doctor kept trying to pressure me to go ahead and have a tubal done "while I was already open" for my 4th C-Section. But those side effects seemed like nothing to gamble with vs what he'd have to do/go through. He advocates for it very openly, but it's still amazing the mindset of some men we come across. "They ain't touchin' muh penis" groooooaaan | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/06/20 07:00 PM |
| 3 | I wonder how many independent successful women are gonna find his company enjoyable... I’m guessing zeroYes, my nose and mouth were already scrunched up in distaste with the words "grown up child, but saying he likes the Foo Fighters brought it to a whole new level. I always felt like I was the only one that didn't get why they were liked lol. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/06/20 12:08 AM |
| 16 | What led you to find this sub?I couldn't tell you which sub exactly, but being new enough to Reddit, I know it had to have been in someone's comments and out of curiosity, clicked and have been a fan ever since. I'm happily married, but had the "leveling up" mindset when I left my last abusive relationship. I gave myself rules and expectations that I never had before and stuck to them. It was nice to see that even without this knowledge, I landed a man that treats me better than even I could have imagined and continues to am… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/20 03:52 PM |
| 5 | Today is the Day I Kick this Man out of my HOUSEHow do you send someone an anonymous link? My sister-in-law needs this sub BADLY!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/06/20 04:53 PM |
| 1 | An epiphany I just had 🤔You’re not going to get a cookie or high fives from us because you choose to settle for scraps, sis. Women with desperate pick me behavior will be banned on sight. This is from Rule #4 listed in the sidebar. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/20 08:23 PM |
| 0 | An epiphany I just had 🤔I think you are on the wrong sub, honey...... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/20 08:16 PM |
| 4 | An epiphany I just had 🤔I'm sorry, I still consider myself new here, but isn't this line of thinking EXACTLY WHAT A PICKMEISHA SAYS????? You have the audacity to use the phrase "wasted 4 years" and then still want to cling on to "but I love him??" I still loved the mf-er that was abusing me, but I knew I loved myself more. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/20 08:10 PM |
| 3 | An epiphany I just had 🤔How is this a mindset shift when you're clearly not ready to leave him? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/20 06:45 PM |
| 34 | LVM is unhappy that his girlfriend isn't 'open minded' enough to do anal and have a threesome involving him and her 'cute friends.' 🤮What a selfish ass. 🤢🤢 at least most of the rest of the comments also support the hopefully ex-girlfriend | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/20 06:25 PM |
| 1 | If your male support system personalizes a general statement about how "all men are trash" after an ex LVM partner deeply hurt you, projects their insecurity onto you, and tries to debate you on how "it's not all men" just know they are NOT a HVM.I guess MY perspective is that an HVW doesn't wail about "all men being trash" just because most are. An HVW thanks the loser for showing his true colors and moves on in her life. Never once have I ever said or thought that ALL men are trash, because I've known good ones. I'm sure you would agree that any man who ever put ALL women in the same category would automatically qualify as LVM. In my mind, as soon as you "all men" anything, you've just reduced yourself to a pickme. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/20 04:15 PM |
| 2 | If your male support system personalizes a general statement about how "all men are trash" after an ex LVM partner deeply hurt you, projects their insecurity onto you, and tries to debate you on how "it's not all men" just know they are NOT a HVM.I'm not quite understanding this line of thinking. Your male support system should agree that ALL men are trash, thus calling themselves trash? I'm honestly not trying to male sympathize, but wouldn't HVM friends and family want to remind you that there ARE good ones out there? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/05/20 07:08 PM |
| 2 | That's a rough 41 😬I asked to see their licenses on first dates. Told them they could cover up the address, I just wanted to confirm the name and age. If we changed locations during the date, I also made sure they realized I was taking a picture of their license plates. Any guy that made fun of me for it was an instant "DONE." When I went on the first date with my now husband, did the same thing. His response? Not even a hint of thinking it was funny when I asked for the license and just showed it to me. When we d… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/05/20 05:04 PM |
| 8 | Pickme coworker strikes again she was giggling "this is so my fiance" like she was actually proud. Then went on to tell me and the other coworkers how "he never likes my cooking?" &I Asked what does he cook? "OH HE WORKS" me: "you do too! He should cook too!"Admittedly, I make my husband's lunch most (>90%) days. It's just easier for me in portioning out leftovers, and *gasp* part of me actually enjoys it. But if there's not one in the usual spot in the fridge for whatever reason, he makes his own before he goes in. He doesn't wake me up to make it for him (he wakes up at 2am to start getting ready), he doesn't send passive aggressive texts, NOTHING! I can't imagine him even thinking about complaining about something not being in there. He knows dam… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/20 03:38 PM |
| 7 | I have yet to meet a man who is as interesting as he pretends to be. Where are the men who read and can keep up with me intellectually?You should! I love the outlet it gives me, from whether I have a leading role or if I'm helping backstage. I've met people I never would have met, and you bond in a fun way over the shared process, anxiety, and excitement! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 08:33 PM |
| 10 | I have yet to meet a man who is as interesting as he pretends to be. Where are the men who read and can keep up with me intellectually?I actually know a lot of intellectual and learned men with varied hobbies. I've met them through community theater, which I think already opens you up to people that are more interesting. One I am active in (not right now of course) is in a major college town. I actually feel dumb in a lot of conversations because they're all very well-read and have other interests and expertise beyond the theater. Whether they're HVM or not, I couldn't tell you in respects to romantic relationships because I'm … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/05/20 08:18 PM |
| 4 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered 5/13/2020No tips in helping to avoid unwanted thoughts. Just a tip in following that barfy thought with another barfy thought---how your life would look like if you were still with him. I do that every time my children's natural father pops in my head. Despite finding an HVM that is the father they deserve, I still have moments of sadness and anger when I think about him because if I hadn't been such a loser, he would have never lasted as long as he did. But then I think of what my life would have been l… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/05/20 03:20 PM |
| 9 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered 5/13/2020Yes! I met my husband through OLD and I remember telling a coworker at the time of our first dating that I wasn't as physically attracted to him, but with his personality and all the other amazing things about him, I didn't care. I look at him 8 years later and can't imagine I ever thought he wasn't attractive, he turns me on so much!! I think it was about 2 years in when we figured out that when he grows and maintains a groomed beard, I find him REALLY attractive for some reason even though fac… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/05/20 03:06 PM |
| 1 | Sisters, what led you to realize you needed the knowledge from this subreddit instead of dating the conventional way. In other words, what made you woke to the game?When I was dating, I put men in two columns. One was no compatibility for long-term, and thus available for sex. The other was actual potential relationship material. If a guy fell into the potential relationship category by showing HVM qualities, I held off on sex with him for 2 months so that I could continue to see if the effort would be there and to also make absolutely sure I wasn't equating good sex with good relationship. It allowed for real conversations with the ones that had potential,… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/20 05:59 PM |
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