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dadthrowaway1989 Archive

View 6 posts and 29 comments by dadthrowaway1989 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

This is certainly possible, but as others have said complicated and not sure the juice is worth the squeeze. Key item no one else brought up yet is taxes. You could wind up slapping each of your kids with a big bill if you aren't careful. Even noncash gifts have to get reported and if they are big enough could cause issues. You can give each kid 15k tax free per year, at least for now
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/19 05:24 AM
1

Dont be scared about going into "awkward" situations to see the kids. Obviously dont stir the pot and be sure to take the high road every time when confronted, but dont be bullied
/r/Divorce_Men03/11/19 03:02 AM
4

i am cocked and locked with the paperwork. i was 100% ready before i started to get hit with the flood of opposing viewpoints from her side. i kept the door firmly shut to everyone, but just had to ask the question here to see what others had been through.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 04:29 AM
1

spent some time with different permutations of these answers. i dont like flunking quizzes. thank you for the comment and helping me through this
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 04:22 AM
2

i appreciate the comments because i certainly am not just looking for validation. we will never be right together. it is just so sad and painful as you said. i want my kids to be happy. hell i even want her to be happy for her and for the kids sake. it would also be nice for me to be happy. baby steps
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 04:21 AM
4

this is spot on with my concern. she want her chance to get the hooks back in. not happening.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 04:18 AM
2

thanks. i was definiltey 100% ready when i took the shot. in the onslaught of communications from her side, i allowed the slightest shadow of doubt to enter my mind today. after having time to sit back and think again, I know i am making the right decision.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 04:16 AM
3

i have walked this logic trail today and it still gets to me.....before i told her, i had many long talks with myself about how i could stand in front of my maker and my kids in the future and say i did everything i could, because i did. now, just because her life will have to change and she will have consequences for her action/inaction, i have to go back to the well i know is dry? there will always be something else i could do or change, right? so how does one ever know he really did everythin…
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 02:45 AM
1

you have to do what you think is best, cant live for anyone else but your kids and yourself now. on the recording front, where do you live? is it a two party consent state? if so, and you have proof she is recording you without your consent, i would talk to a laywer about how to use that to your advantage. i have always been the one with my shit together in my family. very hard to come to them with my problems. mine came around. im sure yours will too. just communicate effectively about how you …
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 02:39 AM
2

cant offer many thoughts due to the russia angle, but you arent alone. hang in there. love your son and do the right thing for him.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/19 02:29 AM
1

i just watched a video the other day that was posted here i think. 10 stupidest mistakes or something like that from one of the big national law firms. it was like an hour but watched it at 1.5x speed. great place to start with a note pad and pen. lmk if you cant find the post/link or just google it. i dont want to get banned from here....not sure what I would do if lost this place right now haha
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/19 05:46 AM
2

opened up to post something very similar. keep your head up, you can do this
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/19 05:40 AM
3

Get a lawyer now. Do not move out entirely. Pretty sure a night or two here and there is ok but do not move out entirely. Separate rooms maybe at least. Get a lawyer asap.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/19 11:24 PM
1

yup.......................................
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 03:57 AM
1

if you love your kids, get that crazy thought about ditching them out of your head. you need a support system. i dont care how bad your family relationships are, now is the time to reach out. get someone on a plane or in the car to come help you rebuild. i second the job stuff above, i know cultures differ, but you probably need to say somethign to someone, maybe HR at a minimum. they can, will, and should listen to you and help. maybe short or long term disability is an option? feel free to PM …
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 03:54 AM
1

yes no fault state. i am definitely partially responsible, i know i am complaining about her but i definitely own my pieces. i think for the most part i have cleaned up and done what she asks. especially on the big stuff. i still get shit for like my alarm going off, like really? she thinks she has done some things, but truly they are superficial. nothing substantive. we have a prenup. she wants to quit her job now (i had tried to get her to quit for a while post first kid). to do that she doesn…
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 05:40 PM
1

good perspective...probably....
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 05:36 PM
1

agree. i dont think so, i know so. the other thing people have told me with regards to my concern about mom maybe trying to turn kids against me is that the truth will come out and it will bite her sooner or later. that is where i am worried about being strong enough to endure, if she does do that.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 05:35 PM
1

thank you for the pep talk! appreciate all of your thoughts
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 05:33 PM
2

i have let it happen for too long and generally stand up now. she definitely doesnt respect me for it....im "a dissapointment". recently she is trying to get me to put her name on a bunch of separate assets....LOL
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:36 AM
2

truly nothing would make me happier then time alone with the kids. it will just be near impossible to make it happen without a huge fight, and brother, i am so tired of fighting.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:34 AM
1

really depends on age and geography. websites referenced earlier are a good start.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:31 AM
1

i do believe most are her fault, but im not blameless. her main problem with me is the affection and emotional support. it is just near imppossible for me to be lovey dovey in the face of everything else she does to me. i guess when we got married i was more of a doormat and a pleaser, finally standing up for some of the things i want. never thought about it that way with the kids. big short term pain or death by a thousand cuts for 18 years....good perspective comms to the kids will be super ha…
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:30 AM
1

to your question, a vehement NO. im far from blameless, but i want to make peace and grow. the incremental steps mean nothing to her. it is all or nothing, black and white. i dont take the same tact, but the lack of progress from her has taken its toll.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:26 AM
1

i do think it really is best for the kids. their lives are dominated by my wife and my inlaws. i have minimal hard input, other than being around and being a solid dad. cant guide activites, preschool, etc. my offers to help are refuted. environment is increasingly toxic, that is why i am where i am. id sleep on a bed of nails for the kids, but if it affects them, i draw the line. honestly i dont feel freaked out about the post-mess future. i know i can handle both kids, which feels amazing. it …
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:24 AM
1

moving down the street...bingo. this is big concern of mine, becuase i have thought about just going and buying a house with separate assets, but attorney has advised against, for now. she hates the house we are in so doubt she will want to stay. her family is on other side of town. my job is here. will be tough to resolve. amen on being more aware in picking a partner.....i just feel so stupid right now. hard to believe i did this myself and then to my kids, who didnt ask for any of this i gues…
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:20 AM
2

thank you very much for your thoughts. i think i know what her real problems are, but there just hasnt been a solution (other than me bending over and taking it up to this point). she definitely has keeping-up-with-the-jones mentality, which for the most part id be happy to oblige, if she wasnt constantly complaining about the state of our finances, which are beyond fine. i do have a lawyer and am quietly planning. great, great point on remaining happy no matter what. this is something ive recen…
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/19 03:16 AM
2

hang in there man
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/19 02:58 AM
2

hey bud. hang in there and keep the chin up. you can do this! here are my thoughts for you: dont do drugs and stay out of trouble. if you can demonstrate some recovery on that front, it would be useful in court. AA meetings or something like that maybe. dont slip up with the law or it will bite you in the ass. document what you can in a clear, concise way. maybe a timeline of what she did with the facebook stuff. im surprised facebook wont help, i would keep raising holy hell with them until the…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 04:03 AM
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