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degs35 Archive

View 0 posts and 42 comments by degs35 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
7

I took time to re-evaluate myself and my mistakes in relationships. My future wife will probably thank me for that. Took me about 2 years to forget my marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/22 02:00 AM
1

It's hard. Find comfort in knowing you're not the only one. I keep telling myself that it's just a temporary setback. It gets easier as time goes on.
/r/Divorce_Men25/07/22 12:59 AM
1

Yes, it happened to me. Do not contact her at all, or it will be jail time for you. In my case, the court saw that she was crazy and deemed my actions as self-defense and case was dismissed. If you didn't do anything wrong, you shouldn't have a problem defending yourself in court. You need to collect evidence of abuse (pictures, emails, etc.) If she's unstable, most likely her life will fall apart as is what is happening with my ex. You can't control what you can't control. Just have to wait it …
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/22 01:50 AM
3

Worn out women are much more easygoing than girls in their 20s.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/22 12:59 AM
1

I don't think there's a specific age that I would have waited for. My oldest kids are old enough to remember fun times with me and their mom and they are still sad about me not being home. I have regrets about my youngest never having those family experiences. My stepson was just committed to the psych ward for trying to hurt himself. It's a total cluster fuck. But my ex wife is textbook bipolar narcissist and I realized that I couldn't live with her for my own health and sanity. When you know i…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/22 12:23 AM
1

Around 30 is when your character is fully developed. For some people, they never have a stable character and you just need to identify early on in a relationship whether you can be with that person no matter how attractive. Marriage should be based on trust and compatibility. Other than a fully-developed character: Marry someone that you undoubtedly love. Marry someone who is your equal. If you can't find those, get a prenup.
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/22 01:30 AM
2

I was bedridden when I was married. No way to live.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/22 01:26 AM
10

When we're in our 20s, we're naieve. Divorced in 30s is a different experience because we know what we want and deserve. I'm picky now, but also lonely. But I'm also broke from support and know I can't waste money on dating.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/22 01:27 AM
1

The hump was my ex-wife hitting me.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/22 04:01 AM
5

Nah. In the beginning, I was bitter. But the longer it went on (over 2 years) , the more I just hated her and wanted her out of my life and it was easier just to let go. I have a ton of support though. She left me basically homeless with nothing else to lose and I got to the point where I just want to rebuild my life from a fresh start.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/22 02:48 AM
3

In the end, I ran out of money and gave up most of everything to settle. So basically, I lost.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/22 02:22 AM
1

Johnny Debt. What has been done so far? It's only expensive when your ex doesn't cooperate. You might need a new lawyer if you spent all that money and don't see any progress on the docket. I'm all done and 50k in debt, but it was brutal and had an uncooperative vindictive ex.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/22 02:08 AM
1

I went through the same issues. There was nothing I could do because the cost of a lawsuit would be more than any benefit. Just gotta start fresh. It's a crazy world we live in because if roles were reversed, I'd be posting this comment from prison.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/22 11:22 PM
2

I was lucky to have my kids today, it was the best fathers day I've had ever. The kids are so happy as am I. Happy fathers day!
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/22 02:12 AM
1

Mines the same in PA.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/22 01:30 AM
1

$1800/mo for 3 kids with an ex at minimum wage earning capacity and no higher education.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/22 01:26 AM
5

I get jealous sometimes too but then realize she's batshit crazy. That horrible feeling comes and goes and it's like a pinch to the gut, but we gotta be good examples to our kids. It's part of greiving and it sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/22 08:47 PM
2

This one hits home. Dealt with the same thing. It's hard to give you good advice because it's not an easy process. No matter what you decide to do, you're probably going to feel regret in some way. But also, if she's pregnant with your baby, why is she sexting another man? There's a fine line between being supportive and being a sucker.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/22 02:36 PM
1

I don't have too many friends either, just coworkers. And I work remote from home, so it's tough to meet anyone with my type of personality. I've been quiet and shy my entire life with people that I'm not close with.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/22 11:03 PM
4

I was going to say the same thing! People get mushy and old during marriage. Does he love you, provide for you, and treat you with respect? If it ain't broke, don't try to fix it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/22 12:44 AM
3

Also... Kids are not resilient. Trauma stays for a lifetime. They ADAPT, but trauma stays forever. Not good for them to watch their mom go ape shit.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 06:02 AM
2

Man, I loved my family so much. There's only so much a person should have to deal with. If she's anything like what I imagine, you're gonna have to take it in the ass for a bit. It's rough, it's sad, but in the end, the kids will be better off. I learned the hard way that "meet the parents" should be a deal breaker if they're in a trailer. Who knows, maybe it'll even be a wakeup call for her to clean herself up a bit. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 06:00 AM
1

Makes no sense that he has to be insured under two different policies. What am I missing? To answer the question though, no. You did not do the right thing. Sounds like you're frustrated over finances, which is understandable. But seems like you took it out on your boy.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 05:53 AM
3

I wish I had stockpiled cold hard CASH.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 02:09 AM
1

I have 3. In my case, the judge set her earning capacity at 0 bc she's an uneducated do-nothing. We're still in the middle of a custody battle.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/22 03:25 AM
7

Yea, between child support and alimony, I pay about 4k a month and it's brutal. I tried to do what you're doing but my junk wouldn't work because I kept thinking about how expensive an accident would be. I'm a ruined man lol
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/22 01:56 AM
5

Do you pay support? Just wondering how you can take the new girl out while paying support bc I'm piss poor.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/22 01:38 AM
2

I agree with people here saying 3 years. Although, mine was a pain in the ass and cost me tens of thousands of dollars, some irreparable physical damage, and yet, I still care about the crazy bitch. Maybe because she's the mother of my kids or I'm just a sucker. I'm the one that left. Year 1 was tough and I was emotional. Year 2 was tough and I was mad at her and myself. Going on year 3, looking forward to starting fresh because I realize every time she calls, my day is ruined.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/22 02:34 AM
4

There is only so much money in the world. When you run out of money to fight, there's no choice. It's the hardest decision to make. Just gotta make sure you stay in touch with them over the phone, zoom, or whatever you can, and be supportive and loving. My ex is taking my kids 6 hours away. I've never cried so much.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/22 01:36 AM
3

Yup, and think of it this way. Most people are married to these types of narcissistic psychopaths their entire life. Good luck to you too buddy, hang in there. At least we get a 2nd chance someday.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/22 04:51 PM
3

And she has my kids. So I worry about them all the time. She punched me in the head and gave me neurological issues and I can't take custody because of my disability. I can't sue her without financially impacting my kids either, so I'm just stuck trying to rehab with hopes that one day I'll be able to have my kids again. It's total lunacy what she got away with. Lesson learned though, now I gotta make sure my kids marry someone with a brain.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/22 04:15 PM
5

Dealing with something similar and I swear I'm going to have a stroke. She cried her way out of a subpoena and escaped contempt many times by confusing the hearing officer with ignorance and insanity. She's refused settlement offers in her favor (I'm trying to pay to get rid of her). When dealing with someone like this, it almost seems like she just doesn't want to be divorced. I wish I could give advice, but I'm right there with ya. Good luck man!
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/22 09:49 PM
1

If she's truly incapable at being an adult, I wonder if the judge can award her the house. If the judge does this, the mortgage company has to accept it I think with a Quitclaim deed.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/22 02:39 AM
2

Did we marry the same gal? Crazy how so many women don't understand basic finance.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/22 02:36 AM
4

I think you can also try trading your equity for alimony if they're the same. That's what I'm trying to do because they're roughly the same amount and I don't want to have my kids worry about switching schools.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/22 02:33 AM
1

It'll get better and easier when it's over.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/22 01:59 AM
1

They most likely will already know what a bunch of BS it was and maybe one day resent their mom for it. I think the best thing to do is keep being their dad and make some good memories with them. If they don't already know, theyll eventually figure out that their mom was wrong.
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/22 03:02 AM
7

Yea, building muscle helps me a lot. Also doing yard work and staying active outdoors. Winter is tough though.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/22 01:32 AM
10

I pay 75% of my salary right now to my ex. She has no income. I wake up every day to do a job that I hate, just to hand my money over. When you fall in love, you don't really think of qualifications, education, etc. Women should come with like CarFax reports.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/22 03:00 AM
8

The divorce process is bad enough, I wouldn't sacrifice what should be yours just to be nice. It depends on what state you're in. The court isn't going to care about Christmas gifts, and she shouldn't even list them on her expenses. I've offered settlements to my ex-wife, and she's out for blood, so I'm letting it go to court. I've paid everything since we've separated, and she has no income other than my support. I'm asking for credits on the bills, mortgage, etc. but not things like clothes an…
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/22 02:44 AM
2

At some point, you loved her too. These feelings are normal, and you will go through a cycle of emotions through your divorce until the point where you are indifferent. It will take about a year to get through the worst of the anger, grief, hatred, etc. and you will come full circle into regret, nostalgic, etc. Divorce with kids is complicated because it's not a complete split. You're forced to continue a life with this person for the sake of your kids. No matter what the outcome of the divorce,…
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/22 02:18 AM
2

I would also say no too. I was married for 10 years and my wife was abusive. Not sure why I didn't leave sooner. The things we deal with as men is unbelievable.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/21 03:47 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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