democrattotheend Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
2	Men nowadays want babies to grow up in paid care 100%. I tried to socialize my kids through parent groups, but was getting nowhere with it. They are thriving in daycare with structure and seeing the same kids every day.	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/07/26 06:53 PM
4	Men nowadays want babies to grow up in paid care LOL, have you ever actually taken care of a toddler? If so, you must have had an unusually easy toddler if you describe it as "not exactly vigorous."	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/07/26 06:52 PM
3	Men nowadays want babies to grow up in paid care Or they are too old and frail to be able to handle babysitting, especially once there are multiple kids including one or more toddlers.	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/07/26 06:50 PM
5	Men nowadays want babies to grow up in paid care Do you realize how unfair that is to women though? As you acknowledge, she has to take a big career hit, meaning she may not be able to get back into her professional field, or may have to get back in at a much lower lever for lower pay, probably in a "flexible" mommy track job that pays shit in exchange for being the one who takes the hit to PTO/perception of reliability whenever the kid gets sick, has days off school, babysitter flakes, etc. By that point she has to be, because the man's job i…	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/07/26 06:50 PM
13	Men nowadays want babies to grow up in paid care It's not just about pride. If one partner takes a break from the six figure career they may never be able to get back into it and make that much again, or it will take years if not decades for their salary to recover. Not to mention that not everyone is cut out to be a SAHP.	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/07/26 06:45 PM
7	The utter revulsion women feel and openly express against the idea of coddling or nurturing their partners like a mother figure is conclusive proof that women do not actually love men for who they are The quickest proof I‘d present is the fact women emphatically do not want to ever have to mother you or take care of you whereas men do not at all mind taking care of and nurturing a woman they’ve grown to love over the course of a relationship. If this were true, why are men statistically more likely to leave when their wife develops a fatal or chronic illness than the other way around? My grandparents had a loving marriage for over 50 years. But when Grandma got sick Grandpa just couldn't hand…	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/07/26 01:45 PM
1	Women are lucky that men tend to have low standards and be simps. That goes both ways though. I'm not promiscuous, never did one night stands and would have ideally preferred to wait until marriage or at least until much longer into a relationship (i.e. at least the "I love you" stage). But most men didn't/don't expect to wait more than a few dates or they would lose interest (maybe because they thought it meant the woman wasn't attracted to him, but more likely he just didn't want to wait). And the type of men who didn't expect it after a few dates were typic…	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/07/26 05:10 PM
11	Women are lucky that men tend to have low standards and be simps. I'm a woman and a feminist and I hate read this post the first time around. But then I realized this is exactly my dad's situation. My parents got divorced 15 years ago, and dad rushed into a new relationship with the first woman who was interested because he didn't want to be alone. Everyone (myself, my brother, my husband, my uncle, even my mom and her boyfriend) have expressed concern about how his girlfriend treats him. A couple weeks ago I told him how imbalanced the relationship felt, and …	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/07/26 05:01 PM
–	Do most women take the marriage and kids revelation as positive or negative realistically? I got more serious about dating when I hit that age, but I was never into one night stands or sleeping around before that. I was a late bloomer and wasn't that focused on dating for most of my 20's. When I did date I was always in it to find a boyfriend and maybe eventual husband (I'm just not the casual type), but I spent more time on dating apps, went out on more dates, and was more purposeful about not letting guys waste my time when I got to my late 20's. I met my now husband right after my …	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/07/26 09:27 PM
–	The "Don't Tell Me What to Do" Myth I think the "pick for me" is exaggerated for attention on TikTok. Most women fall in the middle. Personally, I would not like a dynamic where I always had to be the one to find/pick the restaurant, and I wish my husband would occasionally take initiative to plan a date night. But picking my outfit, deciding what I am going to eat, and ordering for me would be a HELL NO. I like when my husband occasionally goes out to grab lunch for himself and surprises me with something he knows I'll like, but …	/r/PurplePillDebate	07/07/26 03:07 AM
–	Women detest men who “just want to have sex” yet live exactly like that from age 18 to 32 or so. I'm (mostly) happily married now and just lurk/comment on these subs because I find the debate interesting. I wouldn't say I have a side, exactly. I first discovered the MRA/red pill/PUA stuff years ago when looking for advice to help my dad protect himself in his divorce (ended up not being necessary, because my mom was a class act) and when he started dating again, and have been following it on and off out of morbid curiosity since. It's a ltr credibility issue, we know how pair-bonding works …	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/06/26 07:09 PM
–	Women detest men who “just want to have sex” yet live exactly like that from age 18 to 32 or so. That makes no sense. Plenty of women have no interest in casual sex for themselves but have no moral objection to it, as long as it's between consenting adults who agree to a casual arrangement. That doesn't mean they themselves have any interest in random hookups. Also, why does it matter so much?	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/06/26 04:27 PM
–	Women detest men who “just want to have sex” yet live exactly like that from age 18 to 32 or so. The majority of men are not forcible rapists or physical abusers, that is true. But way too many men are overly pushy and/or manipulative trying to get laid. I have no problem with men who are upfront about just wanting casual sex. But when I was dating I encountered too many men who would push for it too soon, violate boundaries, and in a couple cases seemed to be actually following the PUA playbook for how to manipulate me into it. And too many men engage in other kinds of abuse - financial, e…	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/06/26 04:22 PM
–	Women detest men who “just want to have sex” yet live exactly like that from age 18 to 32 or so. For me when I dated in my 20's I was only looking for LTR/eventually marriage. Never had any interest in hookups. But it took until I was 30 to meet my now-husband because I am socially awkward and it took until 30 for me to really know what I was looking for and be emotionally ready. I did get more serious about dating in my late 20's, but I wasn't hooking up with randos before that, just focused on friends and career. Many of my friends are similar, btw. Most women I know who met their eventua…	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/06/26 04:11 PM
2	Is true that men marry the convenient women they CAN have, while spend their lives secretly obsessing over the women they truly desire but can't have? But isn't the risk of that much greater if a man "settles down" with a "6" whom he considers more "wife material" after pumping and dumping 9-10's for years? Especially if the 6 is more "chaste" than the 9-10's and thus potentially less sexually adventurous? Men are more visual than women, and it seems to me that men who sleep around a lot before finally settling down with a more traditional woman would have at least as hard a time maintaining attraction, staying faithful, and not feeling like h…	/r/PurplePillDebate	25/06/26 03:28 PM
2	Just had the talk Only if the person is greedy to begin with (which it seems like OP's wife might be). My mom wasn't. She had a 30+ year marriage in New Jersey and only hobby-job level income at that point. She could have taken my dad to the cleaners but opted not to seek alimony at all, not even transitional. She genuinely had no desire to screw over my dad, and they are still friends now. Several of their friends had similarly amicable divorces.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/06/26 12:32 AM
5	Is true that men marry the convenient women they CAN have, while spend their lives secretly obsessing over the women they truly desire but can't have? I do think it's pretty common for a man to lose sexual interest in his wife as she ages out of her fertile years and for him to secretly (or not so secretly) lust after younger women. Exactly! IMO a lot of the alpha fucks/beta bucks theory is men projecting onto women what they would do. Whereas women usually are not even as driven by sex as they get older, so I think a woman who slept with a lot of "Chads" and then married a beta guy is far less likely to cheat than a man who slept around a lot…	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/06/26 02:43 PM
14	Is true that men marry the convenient women they CAN have, while spend their lives secretly obsessing over the women they truly desire but can't have? Isn't that kind of the reverse of alpha fucks/beta bucks? And given that men are generally more driven by sex than women, doesn't a more prudent, less sexually experienced "wife material" woman have as much to worry about if she marries a man who has had a lot of sexual partners than a "beta bucks" guy does? I understand a lot of men prefer to marry women who are younger, less experienced, more feminine, good cooks, nurturing, etc. - but do they stay loyal to those women when they get older and …	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/06/26 02:41 PM
4	Do people have the right to prefer and seek out traditional gender dynamics, in your view? I agree with you, with the caveat that it has to be an easily revocable choice. For example, if a couple wants to set up a joint account and agree that the husband has to approve all purchases over $100, fine. But a setup where the wife has no or limited access to funds and has to ask her husband to transfer money every time she needs to buy groceries is abusive, IMO, especially if she has no source of income and no way to earn money due to childcare obligations or lack of access to transportati…	/r/PurplePillDebate	20/06/26 02:27 AM
9	Do people have the right to prefer and seek out traditional gender dynamics, in your view? Exactly. I have a lot of friends in my parent group who are SAHM's, changed their last names, and have more traditional gender dynamics in terms of division of labor. But I don't think any of them have a "traditional" power dynamic where their husbands have final say and expect minimal "back talk" from them. None of them are like the women in the Kamala Harris commercials who pretended they voted for Trump to appease their husbands. They all hate Trump and were pretty vocal about it, lol.	/r/PurplePillDebate	20/06/26 02:24 AM
–	Red Pill men: Why do you want to settle down with women if they're so bad? I don't know how old you are, but most likely your grandparents are from a time when marriage was heavily imbalanced in men's favor and to women's detriment. So I agree, marriage is a worse deal for men today than the sweetheart deal they had in the 1950's. But that's because the 1950's were a raw deal for most women.	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/06/26 11:41 PM
–	Red Pill men: Why do you want to settle down with women if they're so bad? How are we getting paid? Other than from our jobs, which pay us an average of 79 cents on the dollar.	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/06/26 11:38 PM
–	Red Pill men: Why do you want to settle down with women if they're so bad? Um, yes. Way moreso than for a man who doesn't make my life easier. What kind of a question is that?	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/06/26 11:35 PM
5	When it comes to chores, it's not that men won't help out/pull their weight. Women just hate to see men relaxing. And so many men complain that their house isn't spotless when they come home with a hot meal waiting for him because their "lazy" SAHM wife naps while the baby naps. Nevermind that the baby isn't sleeping through the night yet and the mom is doing all the night wake-ups.	/r/PurplePillDebate	11/06/26 04:43 PM
2	"meet my standards", "not settling", "treat me the way i deserve" ect. All of these buzz phrases at the core is just hypergamy, 5'4 was my minimum height that I wanted in a guy also. And 5'11 was my maximum.	/r/PurplePillDebate	02/06/26 02:40 AM
2	"meet my standards", "not settling", "treat me the way i deserve" ect. All of these buzz phrases at the core is just hypergamy, FWIW, I actually had my dating site set to filter out guys over 6'. I'm 5'3, hate wearing heels, and have a bad neck. Kissing a guy over 6' is uncomfortable, lol. I will admit I would not have been keen to date a guy who made significantly less than I made unless there was significant upward potential, but I was fine with a guy who made a similar income. At the time I met my now-husband I was making the minimum it took to at least have my own 8x8 private room in a shared apartment, so I didn't h…	/r/PurplePillDebate	02/06/26 02:39 AM
1	Most women aren’t looking for a provider they’re looking for a teammate Um, no. I scaled mine down for a few years when I had my kids but now I'm scaling back up. My husband and I are both smart, capable people and us both working and contributing to our field serves the greater good.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/05/26 04:19 AM
10	Society is 'equal' everywhere except the expensive, high-risk part where men have to audition Men are expected to plan and organize? Tell that to my husband. I know very few men in a relationship who takes the lead on planning and organizing. Hell, I had to ask half his groomsmen to be groomsmen for him because he hadn't gotten around to it.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/05/26 03:04 AM
2	Women need to cook But you...don't. You're unemployed.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/05/26 02:57 AM
1	Most women aren’t looking for a provider they’re looking for a teammate And why does that matter? The same two people would still be working the same jobs (and thus taking those jobs off the market for others) if they got divorced, or never married. If anything, marriage frees up some high paying jobs by forcing one partner, usually the woman, to take a lesser-paying "family friendly" dead end job.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/05/26 02:55 AM
6	Most women aren’t looking for a provider they’re looking for a teammate That doesn't make sense. If those two people were not married to each other, they would still most likely have those same jobs and take those jobs "off the market" for everyone else.	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/05/26 07:07 PM
3	Woman of Reddit. What is your usual response or reaction when you hear guys say "Women are too much work"? Isn't it mostly men who complain about the "male loneliness epidemic?" IDK why the draft is always brought up as an example of how poor men have it so much harder, since it hasn't been used in 50 years, but I'm fine with making women subject to mandatory registration for the draft on the day the ERA takes effect. One of the main arguments against the ERA was that women could be drafted if it were ratified. So it wasn't ratified, and yet people regularly propose making women register for the draf…	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/05/26 03:37 AM
2	DISCUSSION🗨️ ABOUT MAIN PPD POSTS📮, LOOKS👀, AND N-COUNT🔢 ARE RESTRICTED🚫 FROM THE DAILY🌞 MEGATHREAD🧵 Okay you are obviously either a troll or this is satire to highlight how absurd the manosphere is.	/r/PurplePillDebate	18/05/26 05:44 PM
1	Women need to cook Oh I see. So it's fine to be stuck in the past when it comes to what women are supposed to do, but can't have us stuck in the past when it comes to men's obligations.	/r/PurplePillDebate	18/05/26 05:43 PM
1	DISCUSSION🗨️ ABOUT MAIN PPD POSTS📮, LOOKS👀, AND N-COUNT🔢 ARE RESTRICTED🚫 FROM THE DAILY🌞 MEGATHREAD🧵 And what produce are you sharing as an unemployed man child living at home mooching off his parents?	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:43 PM
1	Women need to cook Huh?	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:40 PM
0	as a financial consultant, i’ve seen too many men go broke trying to impress women. why? IMO, as a low-maintenance woman, expecting a man to pay for a woman's beauty treatments is more fair than expecting him to pay the whole rent or every meal she eats while dating. I have to eat either way, but I don't need manicures and facials and don't care to spend the time getting them. If my husband cared about those things he's paying for them.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:36 PM
3	Women need to cook How I wish I'd been born with professional-level cooking skills. Or even basic cooking skills.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:25 PM
2	Women need to cook So what are your duties?	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:23 PM
1	Women need to cook Historically, one of those "duties" was working and providing, which you said you don't do. So even if one believed in traditional roles, you sure as hell ain't filling yours.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:21 PM
3	Women need to cook Pilots sign up for a career flying. Women don't sign up for being home chefs (especially for men like you who don't even work) simply by being born female.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:21 PM
1	Women need to cook I think it should be based on 1) who is better at it, 2) who enjoys it more, and 3) who has more time for it. Who pulls in more money working the same number of hours is largely irrelevant. The goal should be for both partners to have a roughly equal amount of leisure time after doing their part to contribute to the family (through paid work, cooking, housework, childcare, household management, home maintenance, repairs, etc.)	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:16 PM
3	Women need to cook Woman here. I don't find it easy at all. If I do cook it takes me a long time to process the recipe and figure out how to do it, and half the time it still comes out wrong. Everything takes me twice as long as the recipe says. And I sure as hell have no desire to spend 3 hours cooking after a full day of work.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:11 PM
1	Women need to cook I'm a woman and if being a woman was supposed to make me naturally better at cooking, something must have gone wrong during my birth, because that natural talent that supposedly comes from having female genitals completely skipped me. My husband is a much better cook than I am.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:08 PM
6	Women need to cook I'm a woman and I also find cooking stressful. My mom attempted to teach me when I was a teenager but I was hopeless. I've tried but it just doesn't come naturally to me at all. In contrast, my husband is able to cook without ever looking at a recipe and finds it therapeutic. He just has a natural feel for what works in the kitchen. I don't.	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/26 11:07 PM
1	Why are feminists so against paternity fraud? That seems fair. But women should not be compelled to take the test while pregnant, which involves a blood draw. It should happen after the baby is born.	/r/MensRights	15/05/26 04:28 AM
1	Why are feminists so against paternity fraud? I'm a feminist and I am empathetic to men's concerns about this, although I think if the woman has never given him any reason not to trust her and he is still worried about it he may have issues he needs to address. That said, I would have had no problem taking a paternity test when my kids were born, though I would have wondered why my husband was asking (especially for the first one, who was conceived in April 2020 - we both knew there was 0 chance he could be anyone else's based on the fact t…	/r/MensRights	15/05/26 04:26 AM
1	Why are feminists so against paternity fraud? I'm a feminist too and I mostly agree. The only concern I have is about how the results are stored and who has access and for what purpose. If the results were stored in a government database or worse, the hospital reserved the right to sell the data, no way I would be okay with it.	/r/MensRights	15/05/26 04:24 AM
1	Why are feminists so against paternity fraud? I still consider that too invasive for the mother. Getting blood drawn hurts. After the baby is born they can do the test without anyone getting pricked and poked.	/r/MensRights	15/05/26 04:21 AM
1	Why are feminists so against paternity fraud? Under your proposal, would it be mandatory for the father too? In other words, if the father planned to sign the birth certificate and didn't want the test (due to concerns about the sample being stored and used for other purposes), would he have to do it? I would be opposed to mandatory prenatal paternity testing, because I don't think the woman should be forced to potentially endure an extra blood drawing for it. If they are going to make it mandatory it should be after the baby is born, when …	/r/MensRights	15/05/26 04:20 AM
2	Why are feminists so against paternity fraud? I consider myself a feminist (I hope it's okay to comment here - I don't see anything in the rules against it), but I think I would be okay with mandatory paternity tests at the hospital. I feel like men are kind of in a crappy position since asking for the paternity test (especially if married) is not the norm and can be a relationship killer because he seems like a jerk if he asks for one and the mother never gave him any reason to doubt it. As someone who gave birth to two kids who I knew 100…	/r/MensRights	15/05/26 04:17 AM
–	Would you rather have primary custody or 50/50 and pay child support? Because at a minimum she took time off from her career (and probably a hit to future promotion potential) to grow and deliver your baby. And probably sacrificed additional earnings/career options in order to have the more "flexible" job so someone could be there for the kids. If your kids are adopted and you can honestly say that you called out of work or left early as many times as she did when the kids were sick, that you did at least as much child care, housework and household management as s…	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/05/26 09:35 PM
1	How to deal with the blatant bullshit That is not all they are "all" after. There are plenty of women like my mom - 20+ year marriage in NJ, lower earner by a lot, could have easily gotten lifetime alimony. But she chose not to seek any alimony at all, not even transitional. Why? Because she was worried about whether my dad would have enough money for the rest of his life and wasn't out to screw him over. They get along great now that they don't live together. Most of their friends who got divorced had similarly amicable splits. I'm…	/r/Divorce_Men	10/05/26 02:58 AM
4	What is wife material, and why women should want to be wife material? What the hell is "good wife stock"? You sound like you are buying a farm animal.	/r/PurplePillDebate	09/05/26 02:44 AM
1	Will courts allow uncontested zero alimony? Yes. That was my mom (NJ) and the court signed off on the settlement.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/05/26 04:17 PM
2	Red pill men: what turned you red pill? Huh? Isn't that why you would want to be chosen? I thought TRP says most women choose men based on what they can provide rather than who they are as a person.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/04/26 03:08 PM
2	Red pill men: what turned you red pill? My parents had a somewhat similar situation and I used to feel the way you do about it. Their situation was a little different because she helped him start and run his business, as well as being the sole parent for 3-4 nights a week for years when we were young while he traveled for work. They got divorced in 2013. My mom initiated it but they both agreed they were not getting along and it didn't make sense to stay together anymore. At the time I thought it was unfair that my dad had to split ev…	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/04/26 03:08 PM
1	Beating addiction and custody? I don't have a story about a successful court battle, but I do have a friend who left her husband and took the kids to an apartment last year because of his drinking. He was pretty shocked, but he got help for it, his wife let him back into their lives little by little, and now she and the kids are moving back in with him and not getting divorced. I don't know if your ex is open to reconciliation (I think my friend was from the get go), so this may not be applicable to your situation, but I wish…	/r/Divorce_Men	25/04/26 02:47 AM
1	I hate how much propaganda there is around women doing housework being unfair If a woman is expecting her husband to spend significantly more hours contributing to the family (through paid work, childcare, and work on the house) than she does, that is not okay either. IMO the only fair way to divide labor is to try to ensure that each partner gets roughly the same amount of leisure time each week after accounting for all of their responsibilities to the family. Of course there will be some give and take - if one partner is sick or just having a really rough day/week the o…	/r/MensRights	20/04/26 08:31 PM
1	I hate how much propaganda there is around women doing housework being unfair I'm a woman and I personally am not physically able to do most of those things due to a neck injury, but I know plenty of women who can. But even if a woman can't do those things, which in most cases are occasional tasks, she should only have to take on extra chores she can do to compensate when her partner actually does those tasks. For example, if she can't shovel snow, she should do more dishes and cleaning up the day it snows to compensate for his time shoveling, so they both get some downti…	/r/MensRights	18/04/26 03:58 AM
1	I hate how much propaganda there is around women doing housework being unfair LOL, I don't know too many husbands who do all or even a substantial chunk of those things. My husband does minor fixes, but almost all of the services you listed are hired out to professionals. And even if a man does a lot of those things, it doesn't take up as much time as cooking and dishes, which have to be done every single day, plus laundry and cleaning the whole house. For example, half the things you mentioned are just the 3-4 times a year visit to the mechanic that I pay $60-100 for. A …	/r/MensRights	18/04/26 03:55 AM
1	I hate how much propaganda there is around women doing housework being unfair Woman here. I have no need to work in the Florida sun. I have an advanced degree that I can probably make at least comparable money with from my comfy home office. Unfortunately not quite enough for my husband to be a househusband/SAHD, but that's only because he insisted on having such a big house/plot of land.	/r/MensRights	18/04/26 03:48 AM
1	Why divorce if things are amicable? This sounds exactly like my parents. The divorce itself was very amicable and they are pretty good friends now, but things weren't amicable when they had to live together. Now that they no longer have to share a house, agree on finances, deal with each other's bad habits, rely on each other for sex, or deal with each other's sleep idiosyncrasies, they are free to just be friends, co-parents and co-grandparents and it works a lot better. I'm incredibly grateful that we still get to have regular f…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 10:15 PM
1	Is being friends with your ex still possible? My parents are still very good friends. She comes up here from the city and brings dinner once a week, and she invites him and he joins us for family dinner more than half the time. Dad has a very friendly relationship with Mom's boyfriend, and Mom gets along with Dad's girlfriend as much as any of us can. My parents even picked up my kids together from daycare a couple months ago, and the director told me she never would have known they were divorced if I hadn't told her. My mom's sister is als…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 09:22 PM
1	Divorced dads, have any of you opted for every other weekend with the kids? But why would the custodial parent pay child support to a parent who has them every other weekend?	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 09:11 PM
1	Lawyer told me in a divorce I’d be financially wrecked. Wife is emotionally gone. Any dads survive getting hit with this reality? What do you mean "back together"? Like, you are dating again? Living together again but not married? My parents didn't go that far, lol. They both have other partners now. But they get along really well as friends and we all do things as a family a lot. Dad has a good relationship with Mom's boyfriend too. Mom gets along with Dad's girlfriend as well as any of us do, but that's a whole other can of worms that has nothing to do with my mom. Whatever your arrangement is, I'm glad it worked out for…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 04:16 AM
1	Lawyer told me in a divorce I’d be financially wrecked. Wife is emotionally gone. Any dads survive getting hit with this reality? A lot of women wouldn't, but plenty do. My mom waived alimony because she had waited long enough to separate that she was making enough with her business to be able to support herself, and she wanted a smooth, non-contentious divorce that didn't destroy our family and not to waste money on attorneys' fees. She and my dad had several couple friends that had also gone through amicable divorces and they were determined to do the same. Given how much they fought when they were together, I'm amazed h…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 02:27 AM
1	"Family" I feel sad for your son. My pictures of my divorced parents walking me down the aisle together are some of my favorite ones from my wedding. I'm incredibly grateful that they stayed friends, and my childhood family is way more functional now than it was when I was growing up.	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 02:06 AM
1	"Family" The family pictures are for the kids. And they mean a lot to us. I can't really explain why, but the family pictures post-divorce, especially the pictures of my parents walking me down the aisle and walking out together at the end of my wedding ceremony means a lot to me, even though I 100% supported them getting divorced. Granted, their divorce wasn't caused by a betrayal, abuse, or anything that would have been grounds for divorce before no-fault existed, so it was easier for them to split ami…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 02:04 AM
2	"Family" As the child of an amicable divorce, that's awful of your friend. I love the pictures I have of me with my parents from my wedding. In fact, one of my favorite pictures and my mom's was of the two of them walking out together at the end of the ceremony after walking me down the aisle at the beginning of it. Your friend's attitude was so disrespectful to his son. Even my cousin's parents, who had a much more acrimonious divorced, walked her down the aisle together (we both had Jewish weddings, wh…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 01:56 AM
1	"Family" My divorced parents take family pictures with me and my kids all the time. We get together for family dinner at my house several times a month. Sometimes my parents' partners join us. My mom's boyfriend (a retired doctor) even helps my dad navigate his medical condition. We have dinner with both of my parents so often that I think my five-year-old barely understands that they are no longer married, and the two-year-old thinks we are all one big family. I recognize this is the exception not the r…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 01:49 AM
2	Divorce asset allocation in high earners As an adult child of amicably divorced parents, I cannot upvote this enough. My mom was a class act and opted not to seek alimony, even though she could have, because she didn't want it to get ugly. They negotiated themselves and figured out how much my dad would pay to buy mom out of the house, because he wanted to keep it and she did not. I joked at the time that she was divorcing the house as much as she was divorcing him. The crazy thing is, they fought constantly when I was a kid, and if yo…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/04/26 12:21 AM
1	We are ignoring the reality of gender roles here on PPD Of course it is. But I am pretty sure my MIL decided she wanted to do all the cooking and almost all of the cooking. My FIL decided that unilaterally. I know for a fact she would like more help from him around the house but it's more work for her to get him to do it than to just do it herself.	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/04/26 03:58 PM
2	Moving Forward, but need help processing.... Plenty of women don't take their husband's last names for a variety of reasons. You have every right to want a wife who does change her name (and make that clear early on in the relationship), but a woman keeping her name does not mean she has "one foot out the door". I don't understand how they got married without discussing or resolving this. It also seems a little weird that OP wants his wife to be traditional by taking his last name (and it seems like do the lion's share of the cleaning, bas…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/04/26 03:56 PM
2	Moving Forward, but need help processing.... As a woman who went through a checked-out stage with my husband, I figure I can offer a bit of perspective. I hope that's okay. My husband and I fought a lot from 2022-2023, when our second son was born and we went through a big move and a lot of life changes, and I guess I kind of checked out of the marriage a bit in 2024 due to a combination of work/little kid stress, preoccupation with the election, and self-protection after all of the fights. But when he called me out on it in the fall of 20…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/04/26 03:51 PM
–	Divorce rhetoric reveals that motherhood is "worth less" Correction: if it was bought while they were married it belonged to both of them. If he bought the house on his own before they were married and it was in his name only, he would keep it in divorce. Yes, you could have said she was working at Arby's but it's telling that you didn't. Because as far as I know, there is no massive gender divide on who works at Arby's. You chose a traditionally female (at least before high school) field that is underpaid despite the value added to society. And let's…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 03:38 AM
1	We are ignoring the reality of gender roles here on PPD Au contraire - men are praised to the heavens any time they are seen out with their kids. And women are told they are "so lucky" if anyone ever sees their husband cook even a simple meal or load a dishwasher. Single mothers are shamed as sluts and leeches on society (even if they are self-supporting), whereas single dads are showered with praise for "stepping up". And let's be honest, it's pretty rare to see a single dad who doesn't have a nanny, his mom, a girlfriend, or another female relative…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 03:32 AM
1	We are ignoring the reality of gender roles here on PPD How lovely it would be to get to work more hours in a job, so we could further our careers. But that would require not having to negotiate for flexibility because of our kids, or have our salaries automatically discounted because employers expect we'll be the ones to call out when the kids get sick. That would require employers not to laugh in the face of men with similar requests. That would require schools to not automatically assume they should call us instead of our husbands when our kids ar…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 03:28 AM
1	We are ignoring the reality of gender roles here on PPD Hell no - that would be a huge turnoff for me. But then again, I suck at domestic stuff. If we had no kids I'd be happy to be the breadwinner.	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 03:22 AM
1	We are ignoring the reality of gender roles here on PPD You would think marrying a man who has lived alone would solve that issue. But it doesn't always. My FIL lived alone for a decade and learned how to cook and take care of himself. But in the 10+ years I have known him, I've never once seen him cook a meal. His excuse is that my MIL enjoys it and is better at it. She does enjoy cooking, but I'm sure she wouldn't complain if he picked up some of that load. I won't say I've never seen him lift a finger to clean up, but she does the lion's share of …	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 03:21 AM
1	We are ignoring the reality of gender roles here on PPD LOL, my husband is the opposite - he is the primary chef in our house and cooks gourmet meals multiple nights a week, yet for the life of him he cannot seem to make a PB&J for our kids' lunch. Every time he tries he uses way too much jelly and the sandwich is a mess, or he uses too little and the kids complain.	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 03:06 AM
–	Divorce rhetoric reveals that motherhood is "worth less" You make an interesting point, but I would argue that the fact that you are so bothered by the idea of a teacher living in a $400k home is reflective of the larger problem - the societal undervaluing of "women's work." Teachers provide enormous value to society - arguably more value than people in more lucrative careers like hedge fund manager or professional athlete. And yet they are way underpaid in comparison to the value they add to society, as are many other fields often occupied predominan…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 02:16 AM
–	Divorce rhetoric reveals that motherhood is "worth less" I'd be fine with doing that if my husband did everything that a 1950's housewife did. Or even a good chunk of that. That's our temporary situation right now and he does cook and do close to half the parenting for the first time since we had kids. But I'm still doing at least 50% of the childcare and at 40% of the house work. And I consider myself lucky - many breadwinner women still do the majority of the childcare and housework, even when they are the sole provider. That's the case where I woul…	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/04/26 02:09 AM
3	N COUNTS WEEKLY DISCUSSION THREAD If he "can't get over it" he shouldn't get into the relationship, period. As long as the woman doesn't lie at the beginning, it's not "entitled" to expect a man who moves forward with the relationship after she tells him her "body count" to not resent her for things that happened before they even got together.	/r/PurplePillDebate	02/02/26 11:16 PM
1	A woman below the top-tier can either have Chad or have exclusivity, but not both When he decides to settle down, wouldn't he care about more than just looks at that point? The pretty girl he's most attracted to may not be the best life partner, especially if she's spent her life coasting on being pretty.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/01/26 03:29 PM
3	We need to go back to our roots, especially women He doesn't want to be a provider. He wants a woman who will earn her own money but also do all the cooking and childcare.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/01/26 03:14 PM
4	We need to go back to our roots, especially women If men want a woman who does all the cooking and housework and the lion's share of the childcare and take care of them like their grandmas took care of their grandpas, they need to both seek out that kind of woman and be willing to be sole providers. Not primary breadwinners, sole providers. Most men don't want that or can't afford it these days.	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/01/26 03:02 PM
4	We need to go back to our roots, especially women Why do women automatically "have the biggest share of child-raising work?" That's how it often ends up in a family, and it's fine if that's what works for them, but I disagree that should automatically be the default, or that mothers are by default any more responsible for how their kids turn out than fathers (with the exception of during the pregnancy and childbirth and maybe immediate post-partum period - if a woman drinks during the pregnancy she's obviously responsible for any birth defects …	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/01/26 02:59 PM
–	“Choose better” until that means women wont fuck a stranger. Your first point is fair. Your second point makes no sense though. Sex is supposed to be pleasurable for both partners. If a woman (or a man, for that matter) tried something in bed once or twice and didn't enjoy it, (s)he should not be obligated to do it with a spouse just because (s)he tried it once with a previous partner. Applying that principle to chores makes no sense because nobody likes doing chores - unlike sex, chores are something we do because they need to get done, not because we ar…	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/01/26 06:02 PM
1	Men currently have no reproductive rights once a pregnancy happens — and that’s a problem That seems reasonable to me. Although there are some situations it wouldn't cover, like where the man (or even the woman) find out after it's too late to have an abortion, or the woman lives in a state that has made it illegal or close to it.	/r/MensRights	23/01/26 03:14 AM
1	Domestic labor being a point of contention in marriages is the fault of feminism, not men My FIL supposedly lived alone and cooked for himself and did all the domestic chores before he met my MIL. Supposedly. He just never cooks now (or does much of the housework) because my MIL is better at it and supposedly enjoys it. I call BS. She enjoys cooking, but I really don't think she enjoys having to do everything for an overgrown man-child who not only can't be bothered to cook or do the dishes but has to be badgered to even come to the table for dinner. A couple years ago at Thanksgivin…	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/01/26 11:41 PM
1	Domestic labor being a point of contention in marriages is the fault of feminism, not men Using Social Security data to assess whether modern women earn enough to be worth it doesn't really make sense, because the women collecting SS today are Boomer and Silent Gen women who were either expected to drop out of the workforce when they had kids and/or had to take lower-paying "mommy track" jobs and do all or most of the "second shift" because they were married to useless manchildren like my FIL who were raised by SAHM's and never learned to do anything for themselves. That divide and t…	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/01/26 11:34 PM
3	Single Mothers Hit The Wall Early Wow, 58k at 19? That's impressive. Good for you.	/r/MGTOW	01/09/20 03:50 PM
0	Poor baby has to pull her own weight in her marriage. THIS IS ABUSE!! LOL This depends on the situation. Is he doing exactly 50% of the household and childcare work? If he's not, and yet he's demanding that she pay 50% of all expenses even when she was on maternity leave, then he's the one "being taken care of."	/r/MGTOW	01/09/20 03:48 PM
1	Poor baby has to pull her own weight in her marriage. THIS IS ABUSE!! LOL I think this depends on the circumstances. I would be pissed if my husband did this, not because I am opposed to paying my fair share, but because I would hate feeling like everything is so tit for tat in a marriage. Also, it depends on how much he does around the house, and on what their initial arrangement was. I make a good six-figure salary, but my husband makes substantially more than I do, and we live in a high COL area. When we were looking at houses, I suggested we look for a house that …	/r/MGTOW	01/09/20 03:45 PM