dissonantclear Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Aging? I will be 42 next week. My husband is seven months younger than me, which he sometimes teases me about in a nice way. I don’t think anything short of me going back in time being key to a plot to nationalize the American health care system would be worth being in my early 20s again. I love who and where I am now. I am grateful to 20s me for doing what she did to get me here, but I do not want to be young with fresh unhealed trauma again. No person worth building a life with is going to be so weir…	/r/ExRedPill	08/12/22 04:56 AM
3	Do I have to appeal to the female gaze? You said you wanted an unhygienic sad sack woman. I have complex PTSD and I am probably somewhere on the autism spectrum, so I know plenty of women like that online. If that is what you want, it’s a good place to find them. It’s only predatory if you’re doing it on purpose to find targets to abuse and manipulate. If you’re looking for someone similar to yourself, I don’t see it as predatory. I may have taken the statement too literally -see above probably being on the spectrum. I mean, my husban…	/r/ExRedPill	31/03/22 05:13 PM
12	Do I have to appeal to the female gaze? Which women? I am a 41 year old woman and I have never met these women. Like honestly I can’t think of anyone I have ever interacted with who has expressed that preference. Most women I’ve read or heard talk about it like guys who aren’t 80s action stars.	/r/ExRedPill	31/03/22 03:41 PM
1	Redpill ruined the perfect relationship I’m a woman. Never showing me comfort and never being vulnerable sounds like a potentially abusive relationship to me. It’s a giant red flag, and if I didn’t see those red flags in time to avoid you in the first place, I’d definitely break up, block you online, and maybe change my number once I saw them.	/r/ExRedPill	04/03/22 06:45 PM
15	Ladies of r/exredpill what inspires you to help and advice men here? I’ve always been interested in humans and how they work and how they form their beliefs about reality. I found this forum and IncelExit a while ago and it was like a window into other people’s brains. I have complex PTSD and I’ve healed so much in the last decade, and I find meaning in passing that healing on. Traumatized guys seem to end up in right wing online cults more often than they end up in the female-dominated online trauma community. Right wing online cults terrify me, as a person with…	/r/ExRedPill	18/02/22 08:31 PM
1	Ladies, or even gentlemen, how much do you agree? I’m a white woman. I don’t agree at all. I love my husband because of who he is, not because of where he was born or how much sun his ancestors were exposed to. I think whoever posted the original post you screenshotted is deeply troubled, not in contact with reality, and is in desperate need of help with their mental health. I hope someone is willing to put in the work to deprogram them and bring them back to humanity and reality and healthy relationships.	/r/ExRedPill	04/02/22 10:12 PM
22	What the hell does being alpha even mean? Alphas aren’t real. https://www.animalhealthfoundation.org/blog/2017/10/the-myth-of-the-alpha-dog/ The most telling part of that article, I think: “That means that the dogs that most people say are ‘dominant’ are actually the ones that are the most scared, frightened, worried, or anxious.”	/r/ExRedPill	14/12/21 10:11 PM
0	Updating beliefs on women's sexuality Are you sure you’re married, especially for that long? Was it an arranged marriage, or did she need a green card or something like that? Most people get married because they feel a deep emotional connection, as opposed to feeling bitter about trying to create one 20 years in. I’m demisexual myself, but most women are allosexual. Watch some Korean dramas and read online discussions and listen to podcasts about them if you want examples. Viki is a popular streaming service for kdramas, and my husb…	/r/ExRedPill	12/08/21 12:24 PM
19	Lurker here, I’m a little more purple pilled but my God this right here.... I have often wondered about the mothers of these men. Were they abusive? Did they enable the father abusing the kids? I can’t see someone having a healthy relationship with their mother or other female relatives and coming out like this. Maybe it’s complex PTSD for all of us who grow up with abuse but women tend to internalize and blame and hate themselves and men tend to externalize it and normalize it and blame and hate others, due to differences in socialization. Also someone needs to tell th…	/r/ExRedPill	12/07/21 06:34 PM
7	Do women really hit a point in their lives where they have trouble accepting they aren't as hot as they used to be and it messes them up? I am 40 and a woman. I am happy, still married to the guy I met at 18 and married at 21, we still like each other a lot, we’ve both matured and gotten over emotional problems we dealt with when we were younger. Life is good and I wouldn’t want to go back to my early 20s with the fresh complex PTSD and the self-hate and self-injury for anything. Speaking of which, I see a lot of similarities between cptsd symptoms and what young guys in the red pill/incel share about their view of the world and t…	/r/ExRedPill	01/07/21 03:29 PM
2	My thoughts on the red pill idea that men have to do so much more to find sexual partners. Wow, this makes me glad that my husband and I are both probably somewhere on the spectrum and that he doesn’t expect me to spend all of our money and a lot of my free time on that stuff.	/r/ExRedPill	28/06/21 06:10 PM
12	How do women sense ambition in a man? And how much ambition is attractive? I am a woman, and my husband and I agreed on our first date that we wanted to be happy more than we wanted capitalism-defined success. And now 22 years later we have enough money to live on and we’re happy. So for me, caring a lot about money and status and success would be a turn off and an incompatibility. Because women are all individual people with different personalities, and there isn’t anything that all 3.8 billion of us agree on.	/r/ExRedPill	23/06/21 04:25 PM
2	How do I (24M) come in peace with the fact that I will most probably remain forever alone? Ever heard of demisexuality? Sounds like it might fit. I’m demi, and the idea of casual sex with a stranger does not make sense to me at all.	/r/ExRedPill	20/06/21 10:31 PM
1	LMS is it that important ? Depends on what you want. If you want status, money and looks are important. If you want a meaningful long term monogamous relationship, having enough money to live on is good, the looks thing is personal and just between you and your partner and what you’re both cool with, and status doesn’t matter.	/r/ExRedPill	16/06/21 07:19 PM
1	If the redpill tactics aren’t working when dating why do they still insist on using them? Sunk cost fallacy, having made red pill their identity, and also feedback loops. People in religions will go out and try to convert strangers because the rejection builds their in-group solidarity and is evidence that the world outside of the religion is bad and the believers really are being persecuted, so they believe in the group even more. Not hard to imagine that rejections by women work the same way for red pill guys. See, they really are awful and it really is hard for a man and the red p…	/r/ExRedPill	16/06/21 03:45 PM
9	What is the obsession with single moms? One part about it that really bothers me is that my mother raised me by herself from a month after I turned seven. Because that was when my father suddenly died from a heart attack. There’s no understanding of all the various situations that could lead to a single mother. What if she left an abusive husband, like my mother did with her first marriage? Which yeah, my mother had a rough time of it. First husband is abusive, second one dies on her. It’s just….even for the mothers who are single fro…	/r/ExRedPill	14/06/21 06:02 PM
1	Is Friendship the best way to step into a serious relationship? Maybe we have different definitions of friendship? How did you get married without ever just talking about random stuff and doing fun things together and just chilling with each other? If you lived in the same house with your partner after marriage, did you do anything together other than have sex? If you ever talked about things other than groceries or housework or car maintenance or stuff like that, then by my definition you were friends.	/r/ExRedPill	10/06/21 01:27 PM
12	Is Friendship the best way to step into a serious relationship? I was friends with my husband for a month before I asked him out. He took a couple of hours to respond because he was worried about messing up the friendship. He’s still my best friend almost 22 years later. I have never understood the people who say they can’t imagine being friends with a romantic partner. Does that mean they only have sex and they never hang out or talk or have fun together? If so, no wonder their long term relationships end badly. You have to actually talk to people to build …	/r/ExRedPill	09/06/21 02:30 PM
11	Just a rant about life and female perspective on being exredpill Anyone worth being with won’t care about your age, as long as it’s not too creepily far from their age. As for how to stop attracting not so good partners - work on your boundaries and your self-esteem and work on healing any trauma you might have. I have CPTSD from a traumatic childhood, and it took me a long time to learn about boundaries and to trust myself and to think that I am an okay person. But it is possible to learn and heal. Also from what I have read of red pill type tactics, they ar…	/r/ExRedPill	05/06/21 03:16 AM
19	What is the truth about women and money? Is it that important or not? I have been a woman for a few decades now, and I don’t care about money. On our first date my husband and I agreed that we didn’t want kids and we wanted to be happy more than we wanted capitalist-defined “success.” 22 years later we have jobs we can emotionally handle that pay enough to live on while giving us free time, some cats we love, and a very happy little life together. Everyone is an individual. There is nothing that applies to “all women.” I can tell you that we never got some univers…	/r/ExRedPill	04/06/21 10:31 PM
4	Red Pill Thought Trap #1 - Mental Filtering I just wanted to chime in and say this works. It really helped me with my anxiety/complex PTSD. It can take a while, but you really can rewire your brain into healthier thought patterns.	/r/ExRedPill	04/06/21 03:10 PM
1	Lowering your standards is for desperate people. Those who don't mind being alone don't have to lower their standards. My father died suddenly a month after I turned seven. My mother was 38 at the time. I agree, nothing is forever and there are no guarantees.	/r/PurplePillDebate	03/06/21 08:26 PM
14	Even though I'm not part of the Red Pill anymore, I still fear for being falsely accused. Including single mothers? Let me go tell my mother that my father dying of a heart attack when I had just turned seven made her a bad woman.	/r/ExRedPill	26/05/21 04:28 PM