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doppleganger2621 Archive

View 0 posts and 61 comments by doppleganger2621 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Best of luck sir. I think your head is in the right spot especially regarding your kids. Divorce sucks, but you shouldn’t look at it as splitting up a house, it should be looked at as an opportunity to make sure your kids just have two loving houses. Three years out and my kids are great! I’ve become the “travel parent”. I’ve taken my kids abroad a couple times, to places I only dreamed about as a kid. My oldest graduates next spring and we’re planning his two week dream vacation (I told him any…
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/26 10:42 PM
1

Eh, for me, the amount of equity in the house and the appreciation later was a no brainer. If I took the money I would have just put it into another house in the same school district where prices have skyrocketed since I bought this house.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/26 04:14 PM
7

She can't just "keep the house". You're owed the equity in the house. Can she afford to buy you out of your equity? It usually involves a refinance where-in she becomes the sole owner of the house and has to prove that she can afford the payments + also use the equity of the refinance to pay out your share of the equity. My ex also wanted to "keep the house" but when it became clear to her she would owe me $80k in cash and she could not afford the have the house in her own name and also take out…
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/26 11:05 AM
4

I don’t understand why you would go through a divorce, which is a complex legal process that has significant financial ramifications, to give her a second chance later? If you’re giving her a second chance, just do that. I’m not sure why you would go through a divorce otherwise.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/26 03:03 PM
3

I'm not saying you're incorrect about the whole of "shouldn't be on the mortgage" but Fannie Mae rules allow for mortgages paid by other people to be excluded from the DTI ratio if there's proof that the debt has been paid by someone else for 12 months (or immediately if it's written into the divorce decree). I only know this because I had a 12 month stipulation to refinance my mortgage in my divorce, but my ex-spouse was able to purchase a new house within 7 months and the mortgage debt from ho…
/r/Divorce_Men06/07/26 05:08 PM
6

I'm guessing like so many people, they bought their house at an absurdly low interest rate, and the refi would cause the payment to go up significantly
/r/Divorce_Men06/07/26 04:09 PM
7

25 year olds feel like their brains haven’t fully formed yet. I wouldn’t worry about the age gap if this is just having fun, but I can’t imagine entering a real relationship with a 25 year old at your/my age. When I re-entered the dating pool at age 37 I moved those sliders to a minimum of age 30. Ended up snagging a woman who was, at the time, 32. Three years later we’re engaged
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/26 11:14 AM
1

It’s really not painful and recovery is very quick lol. On the pain scale I would put the actual procedure in the pain realm of getting a blood draw. The recovery scale…I mean you’re off your feet for like a day. It’s probably one of the easiest outpatient procedures you can get
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 10:45 AM
2

Exact same here
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 10:33 AM
2

Man, you’re thinking about this too deeply. Most of us with vasectomies don’t want any more kids and are content to not have to worry about making sure any partner we have is on birth control or counted her ovulation days correctly.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 10:32 AM
3

Sorry I’m late to this but man I find it egregious that your ex is entertaining this. I know that you’re divorced and divorces are by nature contentious, but all my dealing with my ex was grounded in the concept of 50/50–money, kids, everything. We were married to each other and the home and life we built together meant that we should split it equitably, even if the financial pain hurt.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/26 11:22 AM
2

Ehhhh it CAN, but 1) it’s no guarantee there will be a return to fertility, 2) it’s not fun and 3) many insurances don’t cover it
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/26 07:50 PM
5

Don’t give up tbh. At age 37, I started dating a girl who was 32 and didn’t want kids of her own but was totally fine being a stepparent. Those women do exist out there. You just have to be patient
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/26 07:49 PM
5

Oof, I thought this was a recent thing--over 4 years is a long time man, especially since you've been dating someone for 4 years. Who cares that she's getting congratulated?
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/26 11:22 AM
1

I kept the house. It’s the house my kids have grown up in, it’s in our school district, and we got it for a great price as values continue to rise. Yeah, I guess I could have moved into an apartment, but when I eventually went to buy another house, it would have been considerably more expensive to buy a house than to just keep the one I was in. Money was a little tighter after buying out my spouse, and paying a mortgage on my own for a while, but my fiancée just moved in and pays me rent so I ha…
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/26 11:22 AM
2

$30k from joint checking $60k from home equity buyout $700/mo in child support for (at the time) 4 years and then $350/mo for another 5 All in all I didn’t get too hosed, we agreed to keep our own retirements (we have state pensions). We did not use an attorney so no money lost there
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/26 10:34 AM
3

Bingo. Came here to say this
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 11:34 PM
9

Overnights matter for child support and the ability to file as head of household. Yeah you get to see your kids everyday but you can get royally fucked on CS or inability to file HoH taxes Why would you do this
/r/Divorce_Men24/02/26 11:33 PM
2

They won't let her e-file a return, but if she files a paper return they will absolutely slow down the process and make a determination who is the custodial parent in this case. It doesn't matter who files first, it matters who had the custody of the kids the most during the previous year. OP says they were "about 50/50" in taking care of the kids, the IRS may ask them to prove that to them. Again, OP just potentially created a headache for himself that didn't have to exist when there are like t…
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 12:25 PM
4

This really isn't true. If the ex also files a return and claims the kids, the IRS will in fact investigate who should be claiming the kids. Also, you should absolutely NOT both rush to file first, there should be a legal agreement in place determining who claims which kid when.
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 11:37 AM
1

Yep and now his ex can also file a return, claim both kids, and then he’ll have the IRS in his business as well as they investigate who rightfully can claim the kids (hint it doesn’t matter who made more money) when it could have all been avoided with a quick conversation
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 10:28 AM
1

Nothing was stopping you from filing for divorce and a tax return filing won’t change anything in that. Married filing separately is usually done for tax advantage purposes and not “we are a separated couple”. Courts don’t care about your filing status. My ex and I filed jointly even after our separation (late 2022) and our divorce was finalized (early 2023). There was no advantage financially or personally to filing separately. All that’s been done is delaying the inevitable and it sounds like …
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 03:22 AM
2

Yeah and assuming they are still legally together that refund is a marital asset when it hits his bank account and she’ll get half of it anyway so he didn’t really do anything except cause more strife
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 03:15 AM
3

At the end of the day when your divorce is finalized whatever you probably got in your refund is going to be considered a marital asset and split anyway unless you have some sort of actual legal documentation saying that your assets are separate as of the separation date. You said “unofficially” so I’m guessing that’s not the case. Again, you likely just created yourself a headache where none was needed and at the end of the day, she’ll get half of it anyway
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 03:14 AM
4

This seems like a situation where you guys should have figured out together the best path forward and just split the refund. Or at least one of you claim one kid and the other claim the other if you’re insistent on the filing separately—I fear you may have caused a headache where you didn’t necessarily need to
/r/Divorce_Men20/02/26 01:14 AM
5

I had one while still married and it did help I think narrow the dating pool for me, I was upfront with women when we got to that point and was also adamant that I didn’t want any more children. For sure it might “hurt” against women that still have dreams of having their own kids, but also, I didn’t want to date someone that wanted kids, so that helped My fiancée loved that I had a vasectomy. She was someone who wanted to be a parent but didn’t necessarily want her own kids
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 06:55 PM
1

Yes they basically tell you to “expend” at least like 7-10 times before the final check
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 06:54 PM
1

Instead of listening and perhaps providing affirmation, I would express my opinion which would sometimes hurt her feelings Man she has you over a barrel. She basically has made you believe her affairs are YOUR fault and having an affair right in front of her face what are you doing? You're placating her by saying you can get a house together. You need to leave her in the dust man. This isn't good for you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/01/26 12:21 PM
3

This is not realistic. What happens when you want to start a relationship with someone? What happens if you get serious with someone else? Is she going to move into your house that you cohabitate with your ex and be sister wives or something? There is probably not a woman on this planet that will go on a second date with you when you reveal you still live with your ex wife What she is doing is being a cake eater. She wants to still be able to have you for her emotional and financial support, sti…
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/26 09:42 PM
1

Hmmm my company just does 26 even payments, so technically even though I owe $700/mo, I actually only pay like $650/mo because it accounts for the extra paychecks
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/25 12:15 PM
4

Just remember that Christmas isn't about a date on the calendar, it's about spending time with the people you love. Whether or not you have them on the 25th doesn't matter. Last year my custody week finished up the 22nd, so guess what? We did Christmas the 22nd! We acted like the 21st was Christmas Eve, did all our traditional Christmas Eve things, and on the 22nd, we acted like that was Christmas Day. It felt no different to me at all.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/25 07:33 AM
6

I would probably go the complete opposite tactic. There’s no point in dragging this out for years. A divorce is one of the most stressful things a person can go through and it’s going to take a toll on you mentally and financially. “Depriving your kids of their family home”—I just wouldn’t deal with this. Figure out how to get the best settlement for yourself, figure out the house, if someone is going to buy out someone else, etc and be done. Rarely does a long, drawn out divorce benefit anyone—…
/r/Divorce_Men09/08/25 05:06 PM
3

Is it what you want? The court will agree to whatever you guys agree to, but make sure you’re seeing your kids the amount you want. I would have accepted nothing less than 50/50 in my arrangement
/r/Divorce_Men01/01/25 12:36 AM
3

Remember that Christmas is whatever day you want it to be. I came from a divorced family myself and Christmas Day was just another day to me because we usually celebrated on some other day. I don’t have my kids on Christmas this year so instead, this past Sunday, we treated Saturday and Sunday like Christmas Eve/Christmas Day, and we had a blast! It didn’t feel any different. Christmas is whatever you make it.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 04:26 PM
3

Bingo. I convinced my ex to do a dissolution without attorneys and made out soooo much better. I would say in pure dollars, I saved $80-$100k in net worth and that doesn’t even include no alimony and reduced CS
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 10:15 PM
10

You should be good. And also, divorcing men, you will NEVER get a better settlement if you have a cheating spouse than when they’re in affair fog. They are so eager to live happily ever after with AP that you can get REALLY good terms, and most things, if agreed to and finalized are VERY difficult to ever change after the fact
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 10:04 PM
5

My ex and I were very amicable in our divorce and neither of us hired a lawyer. Saved us both a lot of money in the long run. Paid like $350 total in court fees
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/24 12:15 AM
4

It depends. If you want to do it without lawyers, then once one of you gets one, the other will, and then the game starts. I told my ex I wanted a divorce (she had an affair) and she also wanted out, so we were able to do it without needing an attorney. Saved us both thousands and we walked away satisfied with what we both got.
/r/Divorce_Men09/02/24 08:45 PM
4

The gamble could affect your ability to file Head of Household next tax season is if you have more than one kid
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/24 01:06 AM
6

Not my ex MIL, but all three of my ex wife’s sisters cheated on their husbands too
/r/Divorce_Men04/02/24 05:16 PM
2

Divorce settlements are incredibly dependent on your amicability in the process. In general, your marital assets need to be “equitably distributed”, that is to say, they should be split fairly. Child custody also depends on the state and also, again, your amicability and ability to get to a favorable agreement. My ex and I immediately agreed to 50/50 custody of our kids, so we didn’t worry about what a court may do. Can she kick you out of the house? Well that depends on who gets the house in th…
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 07:37 PM
4

Why even off 60/40 on assets? I guess it depends on your state but my state presumes 50/50 of marital assets. I’d tell her 50/50 or get fucked
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 04:11 PM
1

Just stopping by to say this is a great post. Excellent lay of the dating land. There’s a guy on TikTok that covers like the “math” of dating sites and it’s essentially like what you said. And the probably with the top 10% of men is that even women from like the 50th “percentile” want the top 10% guy (I.e. the top 20% of men don’t just date the top 20% of women, it’s more uneven).
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 02:15 PM
2

We had been discussing a dissolution but she kept finding reasons why she couldn’t sit down and start hashing things out. So one day I told her I would be filing the next day with infidelity as the cause and I had everything ready to go. She sat down and started the dissolution stuff with me that day. We ended up having a pretty amicable dissolution and I ended up making out pretty well in it because she was still in her affair fog
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 02:08 PM
0

Just be real. Be interesting but don’t be a tool. Be someone they can see taking home to their mom one day. You’re highly educated, make note of that. Say the things that interest you. You don’t have to be a doofus but you do have to put in considerable effort. But I will say, you will likely be the person who has to make the first move. On Hinge, when you like a woman, say something memorable. Say something funny. Say something that shows you read thejr profile. Like I said, you may feel like i…
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 01:43 AM
3

Honestly I found tinder to be full of fake profiles. It’s a little more hookup oriented. Hinge was personallymy favorite
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 01:41 AM
5

Do you have kids? That’s an important thing. Your height will help. And perhaps age. Definitely Hinge and Bumble. But beware it’s a grind out there depending on your age/sex/child situation. Be up front about your situation. You don’t have to put it on your profile but don’t let a woman meet you without knowing your divorce situation. My SO (who I met on Hinge) basically said women don’t even have to swipe on dating apps, they can literally just choose from the many men who swipe them every day.…
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/24 01:32 AM
4

It sounds like they are in a state that requires a year of separation before divorce. So it's their soon-to-be ex spouse
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 06:02 PM
2

This is another thing too--I don't think if I had filed the papers, that she would have ever taken the initiative. I knew if I continued to live with her during even a "separation" that I would constantly be taken advantage of.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 03:46 PM
3

I guess it's different when you live in a state where you don't have to separate before divorce. We had two kids and I couldn't not imagine continuing to stay in the house with her--the one month I had to do with her while she was securing her own place was very blah. Like, we were cordial, but I knew she was pursuing her relationship with her AP, so like knowing she's sitting in MY house texting her AP while my marriage to her was ending was not something I enjoyed, and my mental health suffere…
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 03:45 PM
3

Yeah I think it could work in cases where the marriage just went south but when an affair is involved, the only way I could exist was like removing all her social media and literally just texting about our kids’ pickup schedules and stuff. I spiraled anytime I saw her with her affair partner and she was posting that shit before we even officially divorced. This woman has caused you too much pain and the best thing to do is just disconnect her from your life
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 12:32 PM
7

I cannot imagine a situation (or at least very few) where divorcing adults should remain in the same house. Shit like this will happen and you have no ability to just move on separately. I would do whatever you can to move into your own place or have her move into her own place.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/24 12:12 PM
3

No, it is not your burden to shoulder her emotions or provide her with the support you once did. She can hire a therapist for that. Now, you mentioned was related to a problem with one of your children. Without knowing the problem it’s hard to say, but as a co-parent, I would say that if there is a problem with one of your kids together, you should to some extent support your child however that may be, even if it does involve stepping in to absorb some of your ex’s shit.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 09:48 PM
3

It was some like strategy game, not clash of clans but something like that
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 04:46 PM
9

Dude, my ex spent close to $5000 a year on a fucking app. I was never more happy than when we finally got to separate our finances at divorce and I didn’t have to watch her frivolous spending anymore
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 12:23 PM
8

I definitely noticed this. I did literally everything and actually it’s a lot easier now—also helps I don’t have my kids half the time to mess it up haha Also, my new partner loves to cook too, so we either cook together or a few nights a week someone makes ME dinner. It’s fantastic!
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:38 PM
6

Bingo, this 100%.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 02:50 AM
2

This is what I concluded. Had even converted to Catholicism for her. Kept getting mail from our parish until I told them to get fucked and God’s an asshole
/r/Divorce_Men28/01/24 03:48 PM
2

The best I can think is to explain that sometimes adults have problems that can’t be solved very easily and the best thing moms and dads can do is live apart and still be “friends” and good parents together. They’ll eventually figure out that it’s because you aren’t together As far as the home thing, I think explaining to them the advantages of having two houses is great. Tell them they get two Christmases now! Two birthdays! They get to have two bedrooms (how many kids get to say they have TWO …
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 09:08 PM
2

Haha I think maybe we just have differing opinions of “not bad”. Hell I negotiated my support down to $700 for 2 kids in a 50/50 split and I still resent every dime I pay
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 08:40 PM
3

Idk, my state’s guidelines for that disparity would still be like $1000 a month for two kids
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/24 06:50 PM
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