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duskst0ne Archive

View 0 posts and 213 comments by duskst0ne on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Are you actually holding yourself to the same standard, or are you trying to convince yourself that you being a 28-year-old virgin was an intentional decision about values when it wasn't a choice for you? Honest question, not saying that to be mean. Either way, your preferences are reasonable if you can find interested partners who fit them, "unreasonable" if not and you're not happy staying single. If you can't find someone, I might suggest relaxing your view on student debt and having some sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/23 01:10 PM
–

They were not successful when they were young, are extremely bitter about that, and think the solution is to live the life that they imagine they were unfairly denied with younger women. They themselves don't seem to even know if they wanted to be "Chad" who could jerk around a bunch of 20-year-old women for sex, or if they wanted to settle down with their high school sweetheart and be each other's firsts. Single women their own age are categorically bad to them because they are somehow all guil…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/23 12:54 PM
2

Someone really needs to make content directed at autistic men that strikes a balance between explicitly stating the things that everyone else knows but finds distasteful to talk about, but also not dehumanizing and demonizing women like RP stuff does. It's sucks for you guys and that's totally unfair, there's no way around that, but I think getting that it's because you drew the short straw in the dating department and not because there's some kind of society-wide conspiracy to brainwash men int…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/23 01:45 PM
0

I think these women were immature/kinda toxic and were playing games because they wanted to "dread" you or make you act jealous and protective. This is "some women but probably the ones you want to stay away from" behavior over general women behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/23 12:41 PM
–

I think it's less about finding the dick attractive and more about what it represents - the guy expressing how turned on he is in that moment because he's thinking about you. I would guess the vast majority of women have never saved a dick pic and looked at it later while they're alone, but most guys who get nudes probably do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/23 10:07 AM
8

I have one (female) IRL friend that's aware of this stuff, and we'll use these terms to kinda mockingly describe other people's views. Something like "oh yeah he sees himself as some high-value alpha and he's pissed because he thinks that other guy mogged him". I've never met a guy who said any of these words directly, but you can tell they've been reading this content from the way that they talk about dating. If a guy says "most women are hooking up with just a small number of really attractive…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/23 11:42 AM
2

why though? what does one do with this information??
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 12:39 PM
0

can someone explain the appeal of those subs to me because I really don't get it? like I'm not offended just... confused about what the utility of them is, why would anyone ever need to know who is "objectively" a 8 vs a 6?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/23 12:02 PM
11

I think someone really needs to make some resources specifically aimed at HF autistic men. TRP seems especially toxic, since they take the points where it's hyperbolic too literally and might lack the social cue awareness to know when things like "negging" or "ignoring LMR" aren't teasing and are just straight-up verbal abuse/rape, and also not even actually helpful for these guys. Idk what specifically "blue pill" means here but I think they do need some specific support beyond just figuring it…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 10:46 AM
14

You know what does increase fertility rate? Public childcare availability and maternity leave. I think we can also do more for societal norms around taking time off and incentivize companies to hire women with resume gaps related to child rearing. Men helping around the house is good but it does nothing to solve the logistical problem that babies require 24/7 care and women largely do not want to or cannot afford to completely exit the workforce. I know the argument you're trying to make is some…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/23 07:39 AM
3

There's definitely more but here's a few I found after 5 min of searching: https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/mas8or/cmv_there_is_absolutely_nothing_wrong_with_cold/gru118p/ https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/v82qbh/too_many_men_are_scared_of_making_women/ibs2ypy/ https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/cn4ozq/if_male_sexuality_is_predatory_do_females_enjoy/ew6vpbx/ https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/r94ea3/with_the_news_reports_about_ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/23 12:21 PM
5

Yes. The vast majority of domestic work isn't hard, it's just tedious. If you're telling me that men are somehow actually incapable of noticing household tasks that need to be done and remembering to do them... we should probably not let them work a lot of jobs, that seems like a safety concern. If a man can't figure out how to do laundry properly, how can we trust him with something like building a bridge or repairing a car?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/23 02:44 PM
–

I don't think the point of having a separate women's tournament is about making it easier for them to win, the point is about whether or not it's even a fun activity for them. The vast majority of men who participate in chess or poker tournaments aren't winning either, it's just fun for them to get together and play with people with some level of competitive stakes. The problem is that when women go to mixed-sex tournaments, it's not even fun a lot of the time because the men make it so miserabl…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 12:18 PM
4

No, and I think guys who think this either: a) Are awkward or spectrum-y and see a normal level of banter and flirtation as a performance b) Are trying to force something that isn't there. If she's not into it and the conversation feels like you have to force yourself to put on a show to keep it going, then you're probably just not compatible. These guys seem to approach dates as something that they should "win" at at all costs, rather than scoping out compatibility and asking themselves if they…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/23 12:04 PM
7

Are you a recent immigrant? No offense meant but I'm a little confused about you are in the US and don't know that splitting rent/mortgage is the norm for the vast majority of couples (excluding a huge income gap, or a SAHM obviously).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/23 11:19 AM
1

It's actually harder to make it as a woman in streaming. Basically men go "oooh woman!" and are more likely to click on their stream or follow, but it turns out men don't actually want to watch a woman game for hours, so they don't stick around. And sticking around is usually what leads to subs. Scroll down this list (keeping in mind that the vast majority of female streamers don't tag their stream "Woman"), there's plenty of decent-looking/not fat women with less than 10 viewers. There are thou…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/23 07:00 AM
–

"Rent" absolutely not. She can pay more for the utils and other expenses, but expecting her to pay part of your mortgage - which goes towards a house that you will own at the end and absolutely nothing for her - is insane. This is your girlfriend, not your tenant.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/23 09:41 AM
1

are women obsessed about it? i see way more men talking about this nonstop and women just answering their posts. i rarely see women bring it up unprompted, and even when they do it's often more of a "this phenomenon (that men keep talking about) is curious" than some sort of moral offense i'm confused if you're actually reading this sub, because 90% of what i see from women is just answering guys like you with "you can have whatever preferences you like, but maybe don't call women used up whores…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/23 10:33 PM
3

What is meant by "best option" though? If I have two options and like one more than the other, why would I not pick the one I see as "better"?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/23 07:37 AM
8

you need to be her best available option in order to have a fulfilling longterm relationship I don't understand this and it's also something different than the actual definition (that women prefer to date up economically). Why would someone with multiple options not pick the one that they see as the best?? Anyways, I think many women are averse to dating significantly down economically but that's a different thing than only dating up. If I look around me, I see a lot of women dating men who are …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/23 07:20 AM
12

I could imagine making exceptions, but for the most part education is really important to me. I'll give it a 4 on your scale. It signals: At least a base level of intelligence, especially in certain fields Intellectual curiosity. There are relatively few young people with a burning hunger for knowledge and intellectual conversations that decide to not go to university. Ability to stick through something even when they don't enjoy it 100% of the time or think the requirements are kinda bullshit s…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/23 09:24 AM
1

I have never seen women actually go after a guy after finding out he's taken. Some of you guys hang out with garbage people if this is the norm for you. I do think "he has female friends and a normal dating history with at least one LTR" is a green flag in the sense that you've at least eliminated the possibility that no woman wants to be around him long-term. Like obviously he can still be awful in any other number of ways, but you've eliminated one particular type of awful with that at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/23 08:26 AM
2

what is the demographic info of you and the men you are talking to. class? location? job? education level and school prestige? for a high-earning woman with a graduate degree from a prestigious school living in a big city, her male counterpart absolutely wants an educated and high-earning partner. the thing is that the gender ratio of such people is skewed towards women, so even if every man dates a woman like himself, there's still going to be some "leftover" women who are going to stay single …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/23 01:51 PM
1

so that the father spends time/resources on your children and they are more likely to survive?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/23 10:49 AM
3

1) there's not a ton of data on this and a lot of it is conflicting (and much is from modern hunter gatherers of which there are not very many these days + they have some contact with modern society so are not perfectly representative of things 10k+ years ago), but the general belief is that polygyny existed but the majority of hunter gatherers were in monogamous relationships. and many of those were probably arranged marriages so who knows how much female mate choice mattered anyways 2) there i…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/23 10:28 AM
3

The thing with flirting is that you slowly escalate to less and less ambiguous interactions until either it's obvious to both people what's going on, or one person backs off because they aren't into it. Playfully punching someone in the arm is ambiguous yes, so you respond with some similar sort of playful teasing or a flirty-with-plausible-deniability comment and see how she responds. What did you do to get these responses after these actions? It sounds like you're escalating from mild friendly…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/23 05:33 PM
3

I always thought that one should be renamed "thoughtful surprises", because I think that's what it's really about. If you look up examples it's more stuff like "got their favorite candy as a surprise on your way home from work" than "spent $500 on their Christmas present" I've never been big on expensive gifts, but I really like that love language (both giving and receiving) when it means things more like hiding a cute note in their bag or making a scavenger hunt or planning a surprise party
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/23 01:06 PM
5

I think a lot of it is about what it represents - someone who is relaxed and laid-back, and would rather just focus on other priorities and enjoy life. Also I'm pretty sure "dad bod" is a guy who is still active and has some muscle, just at a higher BF % because he's not strict about his diet and has more of an active lifestyle than a "workout routine". From your comments you sound kinda intense and arrogant, which is a common personality type among guys really into fitness (esp aesthetics-focus…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/23 12:24 PM
6

Clearly the charming types are the ones to watch out for. I agree, but I think the difference is that it's not intuitive to see these guys as bad news. Creepy guys are like rotten milk. You don't need to learn to stay away from them, your instinctive reaction is just "nooope". Sociopaths are like candy - they're actually awful for you, but they hijack your instincts such that they initially seem even better than normal healthy options, even if they end up making you feel like shit later on. Simi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/23 04:03 PM
1

from a vegetarian: if she knows you eat meat and agreed to go on a date with you, she's probably aware that you might eat meat. most vegetarians are not literally uncomfortable watching someone eat meat because we live in a society and sometimes enjoy interacting with other people that said, going to a vegetarian restaurant or ordering something vegetarian is an easy way to impress. also if it turns into something serious, consider that you'll probably end up eating a lot of vegetarian food just…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/23 08:58 AM
1

cute/necessary after becoming official, kinda weird beforehand
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/23 09:38 AM
4

that would be less awful but still no if you are asking because you're thinking of doing this, discuss it with her first. lots of women would not see this as a fun surprise
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/23 03:18 PM
2

i can't stand him, but i think if a guy is going to be an influencer in this area, he probably shouldn't be good-looking. i don't think the average/below average guys who are struggling want to listen to an attractive guy saying "just do what I did!"
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/23 02:27 PM
1

Why do we need "objective" ratings like that though? Like what use is that? Beauty is subjective. I would say someone who gets 3 "9 for me" and 7 "6/10" is actually getting useful information from that. Even though they have about the same average as someone who gets 10 commenters with 7/10 ratings (or 5.5/10 by truerateme). The first person learns that they have niche appeal, the second person learns that they are broadly seen as moderately attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/23 10:50 AM
6

it's so weird when PPD women give them the answers they actually ARE looking for in a partner and they go "well you don't count, you're just a weird nerd and probably ugly anyways". like if that's what you want, then maybe you SHOULD be looking at weird nerds and not at the club or Tinder? not that I particularly want to inflict some of these guys on nerdy women but their obsession with the "average woman" over finding a niche that would fit them is odd
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/23 09:01 AM
2

I don't think there's any inherent reason why a bell curve should be used and it's at odds with the scale that normal people are already using and understand. The "objectiveness" also seems to reflect something other than attractiveness. You have posts like this that are very highly upvoted because that's the kind of woman men are interested in, but she's getting ratings of like 5.5 because she has cuter features rather than striking modelesque ones. I kinda think the guys there just like it bec…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/23 08:55 AM
1

was he a nerd or engineer type? I've known a few guys with those and they're all just nerds who like to tinker and probably imagine they're some guy in a heist movie. I bet he was thrilled to have a real reason to use them
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/23 08:33 AM
1

Girls are taught to back down and "be nice" when someone disagrees with them, boys are taught to stand up for themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/23 01:42 PM
4

I mean 30+ single guys are the ones saying this. Pretty much all guys jerk of to hot girls in their 20's Sure but that doesn't mean that they want to date them. Pretty much all guys jerk off to pornstars too, but that doesn't mean they want to commit to one
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 10:32 PM
1

the post is by the man in question who is afraid that he ruined it, and the comments are mostly saying either "no, unless she's awful" or asking for specifics on the state he left the bathroom in. it's not the woman asking if him vomiting is a reason to end things
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 10:10 PM
1

I don't think you look intimidating in your pictures at all, you actually have fairly soft features and kind eyes. I would guess it's body language or something else about your behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 01:27 PM
-1

Because overwhelmingly you don't observe this preference among men IRL who had normal dating lives in their teens/early 20s. Occasionally you find men like that (usually ones who are not looking for a partner but something more like a sex pet), but the majority of well-adjusted older men will say that 20-year-olds are hot but too annoying and immature to do anything with.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/23 12:19 PM
2

Sure, men can start making sleeveless businesswear if they want to. Suits in hot weather seem very impractical and I don't think men's arms are all that offensive. Maybe it's about time we changed the formal dress code for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/23 12:56 AM
3

why would they not just make it so that everyone can show their arms? that seems like a much more logical way to do equality. of course people aren't happy when you take totally harmless things away from them this reminds me a bit of the air conditioning debates - "well we have to keep the air conditioning up unreasonably high, because men wear suits to work!". like why would you waste all of that energy and make women freeze when you could just change the dress code for men?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/23 12:48 AM
1

No I mean women think this because media aimed at women heavily promotes this body type. Straight women base their idea of the ideal body mostly just on what the media says is attractive. As someone who was a very insecure teenage girl in the 00s, no girl cared about her WHR, having thick thighs or a big ass was the end of the world. Suddenly that's changed in the past few years, where woman with a low WHR posting a picture of herself will get tons of "omg you have the perfect body I'm so jealou…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/23 11:11 AM
2

do you guys not know what kids look like or something? all but one look obviously like adult women with soft features to me. only one stood out to me as actually looking like a teenager, so I googled it - yup, she's 15.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/23 09:42 AM
1

eh I think they're just parroting what men/the media tells them is attractive. same with how a lot of women think like BMI 16-17 is the ideal weight. ask actual bi/lesbian women what celebs they're into and it looks pretty different than this - lots will say women who are older, have sharper features, are a healthy weight or even fat
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/23 09:34 AM
3

I don't know anyone serious who recommends some kind of sexual slavery as a solution. Veeery frequently I see this heavily implied, although rarely stated outright. Like you know that's what the guy talking about it actually wants, he just won't say it because he knows it's obviously going to get nowhere. Glad that you're making other suggestions at least. But I don't know, maybe we also need a conversation about how committing to lifelong monogamy at some point in your 20s doesn't work out for …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/23 04:26 PM
20

What is a win-win solution? Explain how it would look, concretely. The reason why women get offended is because when men talk about this, it's usually with the implication (that is never stated outright because of course that's going to piss us off) that women need to be forced to be with men that they don't want. With wording like "we need to acknowledge that this is a problem" and "we should talk about solutions" - OK, let's talk about them. What are you proposing?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/23 11:42 AM
1

an easy way to spot a high value person from a low value person: a low value person calls people fat to their face a high value person has the tact to either not say anything or say it politely
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/22 02:51 PM
2

I think men should try making a profile as a woman just to see what it's like. Your options are basically: Be extremely picky about swiping, skipping most of the "maybes" that could turn out to be a good match Ignore any messages that don't pique your interest quickly (basically forcing men to come up with a clever opener which I can imagine gets exhausting, but how else can you filter when your inbox has 40 messages that say "hi"?) Become absolutely inundated by messages and spend your free tim…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/22 02:44 PM
2

this must be why conservative cultures with arranged marriages have such low rates of domestic violence compared to western countries! ... oh, wait
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/22 11:43 AM
2

Oh oops, you can never tell on this sub though lol
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/22 08:35 AM
5

ah yes, those selfish women who are raising their children alone instead of abandoning them like their fathers do
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/22 07:21 AM
2

bc I'm not asexual and I enjoy being found attractive in sexualized contexts (ex. with a partner, flirting with a cute stranger in an appropriate venue) The problem is when EVERY context is basically a sexual context. Doctor's appointments and job interviews and buying milk do not need to be sexualized
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 12:55 PM
6

I can enjoy it in certain contexts (ie with a partner, maybe at a party), but the problem is how it's just CONSTANT and you can't ever exist neutrally in public as a woman. I don't like thinking about things like "should I wear makeup to my appointment with my 60-year-old doctor to have my medical issues be taken more seriously" or "does this outfit I want to wear to an interview flatter my figure", and yet that's kind of what you have to do if you want to get ahead. And there's another layer, w…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/22 12:33 PM
2

you realize you are exactly what these women don't want and you are doing them a favor by removing yourself from their dating pool right?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 04:02 PM
2

I don't think so. Both the Republicans and the Democrats benefit from the culture wars. It costs them basically nothing and it means they can distract people from more serious issues. If they agree on social issues, there's more pressure to solve economic issues, which is complicated and likely to upset their corporate donors. But Republicans probably have more to lose there, which is why they can't stop using social issues to differentiate themselves from the Democrats. Democrats just need to s…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/22 03:45 PM
3

i've made a few comments about them on this sub before so i'll just copy them: I feel like every man who makes an argument about this talks about it like some theoretical thing, but: I'm opposed to it because 95% of the time I have seen or heard about these gaps in actual relationships, they WERE predatory and abusive in practice. Every man I've seen on this sub bring this up talks about theoretical ideas like "she's technically an independent adult" and "but what REALLY counts as a power imbala…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 10:54 PM
9

ChatGPT writes a Q4W post literally deceased. I can't believe that this AI not only understands "write a post on /r/PurplePillDebate" but actually gets it so on-the-nose
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/22 01:40 PM
3

relevant NYT article: As Women Take Over a Male-Dominated Field, the Pay Drops A new study from researchers at Cornell University found that the difference between the occupations and industries in which men and women work has recently become the single largest cause of the gender pay gap, accounting for more than half of it. In fact, another study shows, when women enter fields in greater numbers, pay declines — for the very same jobs that more men were doing before. (...) The reverse was true …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 03:57 PM
1

She's not asking you to specifically promise commitment to her. She's basically asking you if finding a partner that you want to commit to is a priority to you at this point in your life, or if you're cool with spending the next x months/years flitting between casual situationships that you keep going with vague hope for the future like "Let's just see where this goes".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 03:55 PM
3

So you're not compatible because you're looking for different things, and then you came back and said "is that a dealbreaker?". No shit it's a dealbreaker? To me that could come across as playing games - the conversation should have ended there, why are you still trying to keep her interest and meet up with her? "Looking for something serious" != "I expect commitment from a stranger after one conversation". It just means that your goal in dating is to find a long-term partner and not waste your …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/22 03:40 PM
2

I see from your post history you're German (or just into German football?), so: The German system of Bachelors -> Masters is a weird result of just cutting the old Diplom degree (which took 5-6 years) in half into a bachelors and masters because of the Bologna process. So Germans still basically do the Diplom degree, it's just called Bachelors + Masters now. Undergraduate = Bachelors Grad school = masters or PhD. Usually PhD programs to have a built-in masters. Basically you apply for PhD right …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/22 12:43 PM
2

It's because the majority of MRAs don't actually care about other men, they just like using their problems as a way to shit on women Consider something like how 90% of workplace deaths are men. MRAs are thrilled about this statistic because it lets them make their "it's so much harder to be a man!" point (even if they themselves are office workers). What I have literally never seen MRAs do is talk about how to lower the number of workplace deaths - because the people who need to be held responsi…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/22 09:17 AM
2

This is a great explanation of what's so annoying about him. For people who want evidence: here is a short example of him doing that exact thing that came up on this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/22 12:04 PM
3

nah there are definitely guys who get obsessed with mildly cute crazy women because the charm pulls them in
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/22 03:05 PM
3

Copy exactly what he's doing and stop cleaning up after yourself, particularly in ways that inconvenience him. He doesn't see his messes because he doesn't HAVE to - he knows you'll finish the job if he half-asses everything. Leave the dishes that you know he will want to use dirty in the sink. Tell him that you did his laundry and just leave it in the dryer. Intentionally don't sweep the floors when he invites people over. Everyone has a higher tolerance for THEIR OWN messes and gets pissed whe…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/22 12:04 PM
55

How many men do you think claim to want a "pleasant" and "no drama" woman and then end up obsessed with the stereotypical "BPD woman"? It's just a human fault that applies to a certain subset of both sexes.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/22 11:05 AM
21

“Now the soft-voiced gentle woman of my reverent worship has all but vanished,” Tesla told a reporter in 1924. “In her place has come the woman who thinks that her chief success in life lies in making herself as much as possible like man—in dress, voice and actions, in sports and achievements of every kind.” Also this entire Twitter thread full of newspaper articles of people saying "men these days are too feminine and women too masculine since literally 1886. I kind of think this "women these d…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 09:30 AM
4

The feminist opposition to "positive masculinity" is mostly about saying that there's something inherently masculine about these traits. You can be strong and brave and stoic if you want, but that isn't inherently linked to being male. The offense is about gendering of positive traits that can apply to anyone. On consent, I've never come across this "you need to explicitly ask 'is this OK?' at every step" attitude outside of: a) things aimed at young men with little experience, where the goal is…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/22 12:26 PM
12

I've only seen about the first 3/4 of the first movie until I had to stop because it was too awful, but I'm pretty sure half of the supposed appeal of Christian Grey is that he's a total simp. He's completely obsessed with Ana from their first meeting and had no interest in anyone else. It would definitely be a lot less popular if he spent the whole movie acting disinterested and sending 1 AM "u up?" texts and strategically leaving other women's forgotten toiletries visible in his bathroom, even…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/22 02:04 PM
5

lol probably. it is kind of concerning how many of these guys seem to get their views on women entirely from /r/relationship_advice and TikTok influencers
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 10:40 AM
5

The rich part is correct, but autoimmune disease being higher in women is probably because of the effects of estrogen on the immune system (stronger immune system to protect fetus => more likely to mistakenly attack own body), not amount of time playing outside. Consider something like T1D, which usually starts before puberty, actually affects boys more than girls. Or childhood food allergies, which are kind of a rich people thing but are also more common in boys. No idea about psoriasis, but Ce…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/22 02:17 PM
1

I think you're reading a whole backstory into this that probably isn't there, because you feel insecure about your place in life. You say you're almost 40 - most men your age have kids, that's just the dating pool of the women you're dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/22 09:10 AM
2

I think it's hypocritical if you ever have sex (or would want to if you could) where you'd be freaking out if she ended pregnant. Otherwise eh, I mean it's a gross preference to me personally, but you do you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/22 09:04 AM
9

No it's not. It's about an intense fear (often irrational, occasionally somewhat based in reality) of being in a relationship where the woman has the upper hand and is manipulating him. But instead of responding to that with trying to figure out how to have a healthy equal relationship, they aim for the opposite dynamic - they want to be the manipulative one with the upper hand who has control over the relationship. It's like telling a kid who is a victim of bullying that the proper response is …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/22 10:00 AM
5

If anything I think men on this sub do it far more, especially the inhibited/awkward men who seem to think that hating parties and seeing flirty banter as a tiring performance is the universal male experience. Or the men who think everyone shares their taste in women. I see "women are not a hivemind and have different preferences" comments pretty often from the women here, but I don't think I've ever seen a man here say "not all men like the same things" Usually the women offering their experien…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/22 03:18 PM
11

men in every other thread on this sub: Women are so picky, unlike men who are completely satisfied with average women! men in this thread: No shit men are only interested in hot women, how could you not know that?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 02:16 PM
13

Can someone explain to me why this is always framed as "you can either ask men or you can ask women"? Are you guys not capable of having multiple conversations with different people? Everyone has biases, why not just listen to a bunch of different perspectives and form your own opinions from those?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/22 09:38 AM
3

What do you mean by "solution"? People can have whatever preferences they want. Other people can have whatever judgments they want about those preferences. What kind of answer are you looking for here?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 09:32 AM
13

Men here, constantly and unprompted: High-n women are disgusting and broken and only worth being used for casual sex Low-n women here: Ew I don't want to date you though Most women here: That's a kind of gross attitude to have about women Men here making their 327982th post on this topic: WHY DO WOMEN CARE SO MUCH ABOUT MY PREFERENCES!?!? Like... women are not the ones who won't shut up about this, we're just responding to you guys. I suspect it's because these guys aren't actually dating low-n …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 09:36 AM
2

I think your reaction to those features is still culturally influenced though. For example, I don't think it's just random chance or anything biological that broad noses are viewed by a lot of men as completely unattractive. It's heavily influenced by growing up seeing attractive celebrities who have all had surgery to have the "ideal" narrow upturned nose.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 12:43 PM
3

Don't focus on dating, focus on getting the rest of your life in order. I don't mean "just forget about romantic relationships entirely forever" or "a relationship will naturally happen once your life is in order", I mean that you should save prioritizing them for later. If you put all of your self-worth on getting a partner, you'll completely wreck yourself dealing with rejection, and even if you do find a relationship, it will probably fail because you'll put so much pressure on it to be the o…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 12:27 PM
1

I think it's a complicated conversation because culture absolutely influences what people find attractive*, but also you can't just force people to like someone that they don't. Increased media representation is probably a good way to combat that. *Biology obviously plays a huge role too but I think culture can emphasize a focus on a very narrow slice of what people naturally could be into. Like look at the extent to which women's body types go in and out of style. Or the fact that men swear up …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 11:55 AM
9

Toxic masculinity is using masculine energy malevolently No it's not. Toxic masculinity is not "bad things men do", it's about specifically how the pursuit of a certain image of "masculinity" causes men to engage in harmful behaviors (to themselves or others). It's pressuring your friends to do things by calling them a "pussy" if they don't, it's "real men do/don't (x)" as a justification for behavior, etc. The reverse concept is much less of a discussion because "harmful things women do because…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/22 11:54 AM
2

Everyone is like this and you have just as much of a blind spot as these "morons" do if you think you're immune to it. IMO the most common reason why people struggle to change their mind is that they have some sort of investment in their idea being true. They're probably not too dumb to understand logical fallacies conceptually and can identify them in other people, but if you challenge their deeply-held beliefs, cognitive dissonance kicks in and they'd rather use a logical fallacy than consider…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/22 09:03 AM
4

this is kind of like those people who say global warming doesn't exist every time it snows. There's 197 countries and 15 of them (now 16 I guess) have female leaders
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/22 04:09 PM
6

do you think these "super moms" are not miserable? why do you think they're always complaining and end up divorcing their husbands?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/22 09:17 AM
4

Like holy shit ladies, just suck it up and bond with your man regular "duty sex" can completely ruin your relationship though. There's an MRP post on this that actually got it kinda right: https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/3fw7wa/from_trp_every_unhappy_wife_is_a_rape_victim/
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 01:57 PM
7

Most of the men who are getting upset about advice like this seem to struggle with recognizing platitudes. Probably because they are hyper-literal and bad at understanding social nuance, hence why they're struggling in the first place and need what women find attractive spelled out to them. "Just be yourself" is the advice of someone who really doesn't care that much about your dating life but at least likes you enough to not want to hurt your feelings. Actually giving someone good advice on thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/22 10:31 AM
7

I have literally heard the argument on this sub that if she gave into her ex pestering her, but not her current partner, that's because she was more attracted to her ex. Only men are allowed to learn to stop being conflict-averse doormats and stand up for themselves as they get older apparently.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/22 09:42 AM
1

"acting like their attraction is some magical, mysterious thing" implies to me that you think women's attraction is actually not mysterious. not "well men's attraction is mysterious too" either way, if it works the same way as men's then they should be able to understand it intuitively. based on this sub, some of them very clearly do not
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 01:03 AM
1

if it's so easy then why do men on this sub constantly get it completely wrong?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/22 12:40 AM
–

Huh? The comment you replied to was about IUDs, not periods
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 07:39 AM
–

ah yes, because men taking exogenous hormones are very well-known for their emotional stability
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/22 07:15 AM
5

I think most women are not so desperate for a free dinner that they're willing to spend their evening with someone that they definitely don't like at all. I'm not going to sit through an entire awkward dinner and pretend to be interested in a guy just for a $20 meal. I think for some women it can be a factor that pushes a guy from "meh I dunno, I'm not really feeling it" into "well if we don't hit it off, at least I get a meal out of it". Does this bother men though? Aren't you guys constantly c…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/22 08:24 AM
1

Having a few specific foods you don't like or ethical/medical dietary restrictions doesn't bother me at all, but the "doesn't like most vegetables and only eats bland food" type of picky eater would definitely be a dealbreaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/22 08:38 AM
4

Feminist, I think that phrasing is bullshit. I also think we need another term for modern times (I've heard "male supremacy" suggested for example), because many of us live in a society where women do have some amount of economic and political power (although still less than men), and "patriarchy" doesn't really cover things like "men are seen as the default human being" or "men are taken more seriously". Gender roles harm both men and women but that's a totally different thing than what's meant…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/22 06:49 AM
1

I'm not sure how you went from "some women cheat on their partners with someone more attractive/"alpha"*" to "I should assume nearly all women would cheat". Where did you get "the vast majority" from those stories? Most people don't ever cheat. *I suspect this is often either a fantasy the guy has invented in his head, or a story the woman is telling him to appeal to his ego
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/22 12:06 PM
–

What I don't get is why people view it like a black-white dichotomy where you're either "child" or "adult". Of course a 20-year-old is a legal adult who should be able to do all of the things that that entails, but they're also still pretty naive and lacking in life experience and are much more prone to be taken advantage of. It seems logical to me that older adults should give them some guidance while they are in the process of gaining that experience. Like who do you think is more likely to be…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/22 08:03 AM
–

Yes of course? Men can wear comfortable shoes but women have to wear painful shoes that damage their feet and are not in any way necessary to do their job? How is that not discrimination? I mean yeah you can say "well that's in the job description, they knew what they were getting into" but why should women have to avoid a job they might otherwise really want to do just because they don't want their feet to hurt, when men don't have the same restriction?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/22 07:26 AM
3

both of you, you're both having a pedantic linguistic argument when you know damn well what the other person means
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/22 12:04 AM
2

He would pay those people and they could use that money to invest in their own assets. A SAHM isn't getting a salary that she can put in her own savings account and buy her own house with.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 04:32 PM
9

Being an influencer of any sort is a business that takes time and strategy and skill, also just luck. It's not a good time investment for most women, nor do most women find the work enjoyable. I couldn't do it, for lots of reasons unrelated to my looks. I'm not good at posing for pictures, I'm not good at makeup or dressing "sexy", I don't enjoy being a salesperson and promoting myself at all, I'm kinda awkward and bad at doing that fake "on" personality. Pretending to flirt with gross simps wou…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/22 11:27 AM
1

IMO companies should be incentivized by the government to hire people who might take parental leave (ex. the company receives some amount of money for each month that a parent is on leave), and also to hire people who have been out of the workforce for a while doing caretaking (children or elderly). I know men on this sub will flip out about this suggestion, and if so: stop whining about falling birth rates if you're unwilling to support policies that would actually improve them. A lot of women …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/22 12:44 PM
2

Is she going out and publicly accusing him, or just saying to him how things feel from her perspective? I mean, that's how things look from her perspective, she has no idea if he's lying or not. Hell, Reddit has no idea if he's lying - maybe he did assault her (this kind of assault is definitely a thing that happens) and is asking for advice on how to convince her that his fake coverup story is true. I would be freaked out too if I went to bed in PJs and then woke up naked with no recollection o…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/22 09:07 AM
3

1) not every distribution is a normal distribution 2) no one is thinking "mathematically average" when they say average. they mean "not really ugly but also not really attractive"
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/22 12:22 PM
1

They actually don't. This is true only in a small number of metro areas. Overall women under 30 are earning 93% of what men under 30 are (which is a small gap but it's certainly not more). Also, racial pay gaps are far, far more extreme than gender pay gaps, but feminism is silent about that. it comes up occasionally but I'm not sure why it's surprising that a women's movement mostly talks about how issues affect women
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/22 09:03 PM
–

Just considering straight people, it's mathematically impossible for the average between men and women to differ. In reality the correct numbers are actually going to be towards men having more partners, because gay men tend to have high partner counts, but I don't think they're a big enough group to influence the numbers that much. I remember reading in some article about one of these studies that women tend to answer this question by counting out each partner, whereas men just throw out a numb…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/22 09:04 AM
1

Both people should contribute roughly equal amounts of work, however that ends up looking. If you're at home with young kids, taking care of them is your job. Of course you'll find some downtime to do housework and 50-50 might not be fair, especially depending on the ages of the kids, but doing 100% of the childcare and 100% of the housework is going to end up being more work than a full-time job. Note that when you hire a nanny to care for your kids, it's not standard to expect them to do house…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/22 10:37 AM
3

Lol this is SO OBVIOUSLY a man larping. The language itself gives him away, but the fact that he keeps talking about "women" in the third person is just so... c'mon, at least try. Not saying that this kind of thing has never happened, but Reddit is so full of these fake ragebait posts. This is not a thing that happens commonly IRL at all. Seriously concerning that it seems like some guys here are really basing their worldview of how women act on some Reddit advice posts...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/22 12:40 AM
1

Competence, but I'm not necessarily the best judge of competence in all areas, so status to me can be an objective outside indicator of competence. Like if you're good in your field, I probably couldn't judge your work myself to know if you're actually good because I'm not an expert in every field, but if you're objectively accomplished in your field and other people respect your work, that's a good sign of competence. Your examples are weird and I'm not going to bother picking them apart
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/22 01:36 PM
1

Very! I love getting people nice gifts and planning dates and doing cute little things. I'm not really a "fancy" person but I love doing romantic things tailored to my partner's interests. It's really weird to me to think of it like a chore. I'm more like "whoo, I have a reason to make chocolates for Valentines this year!". I guess giving compliments doesn't really come naturally to me though, so someone with that love language might think I'm not very romantic.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 12:22 AM
1

30F, blue-ish, 134
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/22 12:09 AM
3

there's /r/FeMRADebates but it's a lot less active than this sub
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/22 10:13 AM
3

You tell them very clearly what you're looking for, and then probably nothing happens because you aren't compatible. A woman in her early-mid 30's who wants kids is not going to agree to that timeline because she might not be able to have kids by the time you get married. Either you don't date these women, or you adjust your timeline. Tbh I don't think even most 25-year-olds would be cool with a couple of years before cohabitation, and then another couple of years before marriage. A 25-year-old …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/22 10:24 AM
2

Idk I know way more people who have wasted years of their lives struggling with productivity because of their addiction that they refused to address because "weed isn't addictive", than I know alcoholics. Weed is unlikely to immediately fuck up your life, the way that getting in a car crash from drunk driving or getting hospitalized for alcohol poisoning will, but it can definitely cause a slow destruction of your life. I don't think it should be illegal, but I definitely think we need to have a…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 02:20 PM
1

your problem is that you think smart and educated people don't go to parties lol IQ correlates positively with alcohol consumption (even after controlling for factors like income and religion) and recreational drug use, there's a good amount of research on this. "Intelligent" != socially inhibited nerd
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 11:38 AM
1

“People are upset” but are still largely allowed to say what they want on these platforms. I think the accusation is bigger than the reality of it. So it's OK with you that Reddit has banned making subs to discuss homosexuality? As long as everyone else can "largely say what they want"? Reddit has had ads for ages, also IIRC they still aren't profitable. But even still - you think that advertisers would pull their ads because they were offended by /r/truelesbians, but not /r/TheRedPill? Or the v…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 11:24 AM
3

Lol what? Not having to be exposed to political views that you don't like is not a "basic freedom"
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 11:09 AM
1

Mostly people are upset that social media companies have started enforcing particular political stances, not that they can't post videos of violent torture. Sure there's some edgelords that want to post NSFL content, and I really feel for the poor moderators who have to sift through that content, but the main criticism I see is of ideologically-motivated censorship. 343_peaches_and_tea mentioned the old /r/GCDebatesQT sub - why was that sub banned and not this one? I think the things that men sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/22 11:07 AM
3

sometimes it's just brain chemistry and there's no logic to it, sometimes trauma history, sometimes people have serious problems in life other than not being able to get laid (if you can't imagine any of those, congrats, your life is pretty good)
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/22 02:40 AM
1

I don't think it's really a black-and-white thing, it's just something you need to find a good balance with. Sometimes you have to do things you don't want or act in ways that are out of your comfort zone to get along in society. Sometimes doing this actually changes what "being yourself" means by introducing you to new interests or expanding your comfort zone, which can be a positive thing. But if you're consistently acting in ways that are uncomfortable for you, or forcing yourself to do thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 11:21 AM
5

personality is a part of attraction but for some reason men seem to think "personality" means "good moral character" and not "fun and charming". there is definitely a point where being an asshole is a visceral turn-off, but the threshold for that is different depending on the woman
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/22 09:55 AM
0

For me it's the morality. You know that woman is only there because you're paying her and not because she's getting anything out of the sex, you know that she's most likely only doing it out of financial desperation or that she could even be a trafficking victim, and yet you're still going for it and still capable of enjoying it? I can't speak for all other women, but I don't think this way of thinking is uncommon.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/22 01:35 PM
6

i would bet this effect disappears once you control for whether or not the woman is working full-time. SAHMs are less likely to divorce, either because they have more traditional views about marriage and divorce, or because, contrary to popular belief on this sub, a lot of them would be financially screwed after divorce
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/22 11:25 AM
3

being willing to have sex with a woman who is only consenting because she's getting paid is inherently repulsive to me
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/22 02:35 PM
5

the thing is that women can't just act like men and get the same results. women who act like men in the workplace aren't seen as "confident" or "assertive", they're seen as "bossy" and "aggressive". it works for a passing ftm because they're perceived as a man, but the average woman won't get the same response edit: it's also bizarre that men will complain about women today not being feminine enough, and simultaneously punish them for not acting like men. maybe we should just change workplace cu…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/22 12:54 PM
7

how did you read "just pay for a test tube baby" and think he was being serious
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 12:43 PM
5

Should men be paid more across the board? Again, you seem to have not understood the article. Men are still outearning women on average. The geographical distribution of men and women is such that in a small number of cities, women outearn men. When people discuss the pay gap they cite a study that focuses on one variable. When you take other variables into account that gap dissipates. IIRC it doesn't disappear entirely, but shrinks to something like 5%. Either way, the argument isn't just "wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 09:38 AM
2

Did you read what the article actually says? "Young women earn at least as much as young men in 22 US metros" out of the 250 metros that they looked at total. Young men are still outearning young women on average. A lot of this is probably explained by college-educated young women having a stronger preference than their male peers for moving to big cities.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 08:54 AM
5

High level of ambition and entrepreneurial spirit. You'll always be second place to their work, there's a lot of judgment about spending your time on what they perceive to be "frivolous" things, and it tends to come along with other personality traits like arrogance and inability to compromise.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/22 08:33 AM
2

I think it depends too much on her reasoning. Does she just want a room that's "hers" that she can decorate however she wants? Is she an introvert that wants a space that she can retreat to and not be bothered? Is she a light sleeper and he a snorer? Do they have very different sleep schedules? OPs approach to this is horrible because they seem to have totally skipped discussing the why, and he just jumped immediately to taking it personally and flipping out.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/22 06:54 AM
1

drinking the soda isn't really gross, the gross part is that you apparently haven't vacuumed under your bed for 6 months if it took you that long to find it
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/22 10:47 PM
4

One of the things I find amusing about the TRP men is that they claim to like women who are low N/have children/don't get divorced, and yet those seem to be the female posters here that they dislike the most. Also the "women have unreasonably high standards, unlike men, who are capable of being happy with an average looking woman!" combined with "there's no way you're attractive if you're posting on Reddit, therefore your opinion on dating doesn't count" is pretty funny too.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/22 01:30 PM
0

Emotional immaturity, inability to deal with conflict in a healthy way Bad at "adulting" (keeping things clean, cooking healthy food, paying bills on time, etc) Spends excessive time playing video games at the expense of other things in life Inability to keep a job, poor long-term planning ability
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 03:18 PM
4

I dunno, I know plenty of men who only do recreational sports like 5-10 hours a week who have nice physiques. Yeah I think women probably can't tell you how much more work it is to get from "goes to the rock climbing gym 3 times a week" to Chris Hemsworth, but also... we don't really care, the former guy still has a nice body. Men who think women only want Chris Hemsworth are the equivalent of women thinking that they can't find a man unless they're underweight and have an Instagram model ass. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/22 07:45 AM
1

IMO she is technically correct but I'm not sure it's the hill to die on. I am so confused about all of these people who don't understand the difference between a girlfriend and a tenant though. Charging your girlfriend rent is like charging your friends hotel prices if they visit you and stay at your place (or even half of the hotel price, and then saying "well it's a good deal!").
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/22 11:09 AM
3

We have data on what age people get married (which is not disputable) and on how long they date before getting married (this is more subjective but who is lying about this). Most women get married in their late 20's, and date their partner for ~5 years before marriage. The idea that "all women are spending their 20's having casual sex and then panicking and looking for a beta bucks at age 30" is not supported. Most women are already dating the guy that they will marry in their mid 20's. P.S. onl…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 11:26 AM
7

I brought myself to pull the sperg move and politely ask why she wasn't feeling it This always results in the guy either becoming aggressive, or claiming he will change these traits about himself to date you. Plus it's just an awkward position to be in - I don't actually want to insult the guy, nor do I really want to be his dating coach. And sometimes there's really not anything wrong with him, he's just not what I'm looking for, and it's weird for me to give advice to mold him into my own pers…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/22 08:48 AM
2

Why wait until he saw a picture of her ex to bring it up then? Either way, if he's not happy about how she's treating him or her level of attraction to him, he can leave. No one is making him stay with her. I still don't get what his goal was in bringing this up.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 02:42 PM
-1

He's bitter that he was unsuccessful when he was younger, and he's taking it out on her, which is kind of illogical. He clearly IS resentful, otherwise he wouldn't have even said anything in the first place. Exactly what outcome was he even expecting by bringing that up to her? Like wtf does he even expect her to do? If he isn't happy that her ex was hotter than him, he doesn't have to stay with her. But he's just putting her in an impossible situation here.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 02:32 PM
3

Ideal situation is that people see both themselves and their partner as the prize. Both people should feel lucky to be with their partner, but there shouldn't be a power dynamic around it. I always assumed the TRP advice here actually meant "stop putting women on a pedestal and recognize that you also bring value to the relationship" and not "she should feel lucky to be with you, not the other way around", but maybe that is too charitable of an interpretation.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 12:24 PM
7

Calling paid Tinder prostitution is like saying that going to a bar or a club with a cover to pick up women is prostitution. Yes there is a huge difference between paying for access to a venue to find women who want to have casual sex with you, and paying a woman who doesn't even want to fuck you but needs the money.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/22 12:18 PM
–

preselection != high-n count the ideal is a man that COULD have any woman, but he doesn't want them, he only wants you. look at romance stories aimed at woman, every male love interest is this guy. they're not high-n player types
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/22 02:27 PM
7

There's a certain depth to a long-term relationship over many years that you just can't get from short-term casual relationships. Having someone who has been by your side through everything, good and bad, over the years, who you've had thousands of hours of conversations and tons of experiences with, knowing all of their little habits and all of the stories of the things who made them who they are today... a casual relationship just can't remotely compare for me. Casual dating and going through …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 12:04 PM
23

Why would women know this? Do you know how much women exercise to get their bodies, how little calories they need to eat to maintain an "ideal" body, or how much time and money they spend on makeup? Probably not, especially because women know that men don't like high-maintenance women and play down how much work they put into their appearance. It's not like there's a direct correlation between number of hours spent exercising and body type anyways. The Bumble guy does ultramarathons, which are a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/22 11:35 AM
3

Let’s say your SO develops and interest in mma and starts training. NOPE. NOPE NOPE NOPE. Not staying with someone who is going to end up with brain damage. I don't care about losing the fight, although crying and reacting like that is a little... pull yourself together, it's just a sport. Not caring about brain health is disgusting to me though.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 11:19 PM
1

The number of men who a woman will find attractive walking down the street is extremely small. The number of men who a woman will find attractive given that she has interacted with him in a social situation, particularly if he is good at flirting and escalating properly, is much higher.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/22 02:38 PM
5

Factors other than looks go into attraction, but a woman who already knows you (how you act, talk, move, smell, etc) and isn't attracted to you is very rarely going to change her mind. I mean more those guys who think that they can somehow logically argue a woman into wanting to date them (has happened to me multiple times), or convince a woman who has already friendzoned them for a while to change her mind. Plus a lot of women just aren't going to have casual sex with a guy she just met, no mat…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 01:37 PM
1

Seeking either commitment or casual sex because you actually want those things is fine. Doing them specifically for validation is not really healthy. A woman whose primary motivation to find a relationship is validation that she's desirable, and not the relationship itself, probably also needs therapy.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 01:18 PM
9

Right: Advice relating to self-improvement and taking responsibility for your own life. Attraction being non-negotiable. Wrong: Pretty much everything else, particularly: Basically all of their "truths" about women. Hypergamy, AF/BB, that all women are constantly looking to "branch swing", "women are the oldest teenager in the house", etc. The idea that a relationship (either committed or "spinning plates") necessarily involves manipulative strategies like dread or "holding frame". 80/20 interpr…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 01:15 PM
1

I mean, some men actually want relationships, and some men catch feelings. You're going on the assumption that every man's goal is casual sex without a relationship, and that the only reason why men enter relationships is because they can't get sex otherwise. IME it's a small number of men who want to be lifelong bachelors and think this way long-term. A lot of guys get bored of casual sex after a while and want to find someone that they can have a real connection with. You're only 20, so there'…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/22 12:58 PM
1

Pressuring I would guess is love bombing a lot of the time. Just expressing interest in marriage early on, like casually saying "when we get married..." probably just means he really likes the girl and sees a future with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 04:31 PM
8

chronically single people are a lot more likely to only have friends of the same sex, so you aren't meeting these girls because their friends are mostly/all female
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/22 10:21 AM
2

What are you suggesting, exactly? That women should date men that they're not attracted to, to avoid some sort of "consequences"? That we "intervene" and entirely roll back feminism so women are forced to depend on men to survive? There's no way to enforce "fairness" in dating that isn't forcing people to date people that they aren't into.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 12:27 PM
5

Might be for guys to accept that the deciders make the leagues and live with that? Obviously? The idea of "objective" leagues is ridiculous. Your league is whoever will date you, and this applies to both men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/22 11:52 AM
26

I'm actually not sure it's an inherent part of male sexuality, given the number of men who don't seem to care (and how much this seems to correlate with the man's own sexual success). Also that I have never once heard of a gay man caring about this at all. I mean I get the evopsych argument for it, but the reality that I observe is that the only men who care that much are the ones who are inexperienced themselves. Maybe experienced men are bothered by it on some level, but it doesn't seem to res…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/22 11:12 PM
1

No shit, but he's not 10/10 looks-wise and is never going to be anywhere near that, so he needs to figure out what he can do with what he's been given. Some men are lucky enough that their looks alone will catch someone's interest, most men are not and need to find some other way to make themselves appealing if they want to find a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 02:14 PM
1

He comes across as boring, and his profile feels more like he's applying for a job than a relationship. Like yes, his looks/height/being Indian are going to make OLD hard for him and he should probably look IRL instead, but he comes across as the definition of "standard issue Indian software developer". Maybe he is actually a fun person IRL, but his profile is giving zero indication of that. If he's into salsa dancing, ice skating, and sketching, he should go to social events for those and meet …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/22 10:19 AM
8

the actual thread though
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/22 07:11 PM
12

Because they're our friends and we like them and want them to feel good about themselves. From a feminist perspective, I don't think it's really productive, because it just reinforces the idea that a woman's only value is in her looks. When we call an ugly woman beautiful, it's less about "factually, I think you are good looking" and more about countering the "ugly = worthless" idea she has in her head. It would probably be more productive to reframe the original thinking from "I'm ugly, therefo…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 05:47 PM
14

I dunno I think that's on your company for hiring someone underqualified and not wanting to train them on the clock. If you want someone with more than a 6 week bootcamp worth of education, pay up for an actual CS grad.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/22 04:16 PM
1

Not sure who does faster in general, but I think men getting bored first is missed a lot of the time, because a man who is tired of his partner still wants to have sex with her. I think one of the more common dead bedrooms situations actually starts with the man losing interest, and then it comes out in his behavior (just wanting low-effort sex without bothering with seduction), which subsequently results in the woman losing interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 02:41 PM
3

That is a horrible methodology and it's obvious the person doing this research didn't even look at their own data. Go search Twitter for "slut" or "whore" - the majority of tweets are women calling THEMSELVES those words in a positive way. Most of the tweets using the words in a negative way are in fact from men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/22 04:57 PM
4

Hair/skin/eye color are slightly sexually dimorphic, with women leaning lighter than men on all of those within a single ethnic population. So it's the same reason why blonde hair is preferred on women, and pale skin is the beauty standard for women (but not men) in some cultures. There was an interesting study that showed that men with brown eyes were perceived as more dominant than men with blue eyes - even when they were photoshopped to switch the eye colors. So seems like it's related to the…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/21 02:48 PM
7

The fact that the majority of women on those platforms don't make that much money and it's a very small number of people who "make it"? "Go be a successful influencer" is literally just "go become a celebrity", there's a limited number of people who can succeed at it and luck is a huge factor. Or that not everyone wants to or has the personality to do so? Even if you stay away from OF and go for less sexualized content, it's still a job that takes a ton of work that not everyone enjoys. I think …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/21 10:27 PM
2

I don't understand how you can be in love with someone in a romantic sexual way and have the idea of having sex with them so revolting and unbearable that it becomes traumatic Yes because you are a man. And yeah I think a year is reasonable. Perhaps longer if there's extenuating life circumstances like having just had a baby, illness, grief, etc. So basically you're stuck with choosing between a shitty divorce life, a sexless marriage where you resent your partner, or cheating. Why would anyone …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/21 02:54 PM
1

Imagine if every single partner got out of doing anything by saying "not transactional". "Don't want to wash the dishes, relationships aren't transactional." "Don't want to drive the kids to school, relationships aren't transactional." "Don't want to love you, relationships aren't transactional." It's literally just a lazy excuse for taking and not giving. I started this conversation out by saying that sex is different from most other activities like this. Like I said, maybe it's so far from the…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/21 02:17 PM
2

I mean most women work 8 hour days too lol. Even the ones who don't are busy taking care of your children, so it's not like they're just lounging around at home enjoying free money. Either way, a woman "simply not wanting to" is an issue with desire. It's not normal to not want to have sex with your partner. Women don't just put up with sex until they get married and then say "great, I don't have to do this anymore" - women generally actually desire their partner and actively want sex with them,…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/21 01:48 PM
1

Sex I think is kind of an exception, because having frequent "duty sex" you don't want is a lot more mentally unpleasant than other chores or nice favors. IMO sex should never be transactional and it's not something you can ever "owe" someone. You can love someone and be more than happy to go out of your way to do other things to make them happy, but if you don't desire sex, there's no "just do it anyways because he's owed it" that doesn't have a negative impact on your mental health and your re…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/21 12:50 PM
3

Without either heavy moderation or a subject matter that naturally is female-dominated (ex. a sub for skincare or The Sims), online communities generally follow the trend that unpleasant men become more and more common and eventually drive out most of the women/reasonable men. I think this sub is hard to moderate in way that keeps guys like that from driving people away without censoring the actual subject matter of the sub, because outright misogyny is literally on-topic. So I think you're righ…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/21 10:43 AM
10

IMO he clearly believes that, but was dancing around directly saying "divorce should be illegal" because he knows the blowback he'd get for that soundbyte. The interviewer pretty directly asked him if he thinks it should be illegal and he dodged the question, and at the end he says "maybe the rule should be, if you don't have children, then divorce is no problem, but if you have children-" and then doesn't finish the sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/21 11:38 AM
6

Does he think the result of making divorce illegal would be that the same number of people would get married, and that instead of divorcing, they would all stay in cohabiting relationships? People would separate without legally divorcing. More people would opt not to get married, which is WORSE for children, because the "divorce is messy and complicated" barrier that makes people think twice before ending a marriage wouldn't be there anymore. For a psychologist, he has a pretty poor understandin…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/21 10:42 AM
3

How crazy is he? If you expect he'd try to retaliate somehow, I'd stay out of it. Otherwise I think you should tell her everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/21 09:25 PM
6

Idk, do you not know anyone who is really into going to every new restaurant that opens and trying new recipes? I think it's fair that they would want to find people who would enjoy doing that with them, and avoid the kind of people who are happy eating the same few meals repeatedly.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/21 12:59 PM
6

as a woman who has never had sex with someone I met while traveling and doesn't have an Instagram account, because it's fun? It's fun seeing new places, and seeing all those sights you've only seen in movies/pictures, and going to cool museums, and people-watching, and trying new foods, and all that. Why are (some) men boring and just want to sit around at home?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/21 12:42 PM
3

Sometimes this works the other way around too though. Predatory men go out of their way to target women who seem like they'd be easy victims, often because they've already been victimized in the past and have adopted a victim posture/mentality - turning it into a vicious cycle of attracting more predatory men and further entrenching the belief that men are all scary and dangerous. Whereas men with healthy self-esteem are more likely to just avoid these women, because they don't come across as ps…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/21 09:42 AM
10

Remember to “reward” behaviour you want to encourage… The problem here is that praising a man for picking his socks up off the floor or putting his dishes in the dishwasher correctly makes women feel like they're parenting a toddler and completely kills sexual attraction. I get that "why do you always" is usually not a great way to approach issues in a relationship, but there's only so many times you can directly say "please clean the dirty dishes you left in the sink" before you become resentfu…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/21 01:24 PM
10

Probably more "I was raised UMC and grew up with cultural values that told me that following my passions was far more important than thinking practically about my future, also the idea of being poor is some vague theoretical concept and not something I think could ever happen to me". 18-year-olds are probably not thinking concretely or realistically enough to view it as "I know my job prospects are poor and I'm going to find a rich partner". They think they're going to be one of the few that mak…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/21 09:46 AM
6

Both are fine preferences to have, but both groups sometimes say offensive things out of post-hoc rationalization. You can't seriously tell me that anyone was like "well I thought high-n women were OK, then I read the statistics on divorce" or "I thought bi men were OK, then I read about HIV rates" - they're both trying to find reasons to justify that visceral "ick" feeling.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/21 05:40 PM
2

Just not wanting to fuck someone is not any type of -phobia. The guys on this sub are legit like "I think lesbians don't exist and they all are hungry for Chad cock" and the women are like "I would personally prefer not to date bi men" and you think it's the women who are more homophobic?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/21 08:50 AM
5

Lol at just using "low quality articles" as a way to dismiss evidence you don't like. The digit ratio article is a meta-analysis with > 1000 people of each orientation (which, incidentally, shows a difference in prenatal androgen exposure in lesbians but not gay men). Do the same Google search for homosexuals. There's been significantly more research done on gay men, because of the general tendency for research to focus on men and also that they approach it with the same biases that you have - t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/21 12:03 PM
4

Yes they are? Did you literally just make this up without spending a single minute looking for evidence? https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-021-84496-z https://www.newscientist.com/article/dn9125-clue-to-sexual-attraction-found-in-lesbian-brain/ https://doi.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fa0018764 https://asa.scitation.org/doi/10.1121/1.426845 Also it's fairly obvious that lesbians have masculinized brains if you look at the careers and hobbies that they're interested in.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/21 11:47 AM
4

Just sounds like the gender swapped version of the "forever girlfriend" to me. Someone who is comfortable to date and you like well enough, but who you aren't crazy enough about to want to commit to long-term. I think you're reading too much into it if you're getting "she dumped him because he was too nice" from this article.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/21 07:40 PM
6

Vaccination rates are higher in Scandinavia than in most other countries, also the population is healthier (less fat). In the US, hospitals are completely overrun with unvaccinated people who got COVID. Check out the differences in excess mortality in the US and Europe. It's not just Americans making a big deal about nothing, there's actually a ton of people dying from it. Part of me just wants to say "if you chose not to get vaccinated and you have severe COVID, you can go die at home and stop …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/21 08:24 AM
4

Lol no one on this entire thread bothered to look up the numbers. Scandinavia (and France) have the highest birth rates in Europe. Being European is associated with low birth rates, for various reasons, many of which were mentioned in this thread already. It seems that within Europe, that parental leave policies do have a positive effect. Culture matters too though - birth rate is lower in countries like Germany that also have great parental leave policies, but have a culture where women are exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/21 02:16 AM
12

Guys should be socially shamed for engaging in these relationships, young women should be warned to stay away from them. Women obviously have the ability to leave/reject these men, but young people are dumb and naive and don't necessarily see why these relationships are a bad idea for them until they're already caught up in the abuse. It's the role of older adults to give guidance to younger adults who, despite being legally adults, are still immature and need some direction on making good decis…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 02:06 PM
21

I feel like every man who makes an argument about this talks about it like some theoretical thing, but: I'm opposed to it because 95% of the time I have seen or heard about these gaps in actual relationships, they WERE predatory and abusive in practice. Every man I've seen on this sub bring this up talks about theoretical ideas like "she's technically an independent adult" and "but what REALLY counts as a power imbalance anyways", and I just don't care to try to give you some perfect proof that …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 01:47 PM
3

Idk I just don't like hanging out with people who are high on a regular basis. Like you're trying to have a normal conversation and they're just couch-locked and replying with some weird high-logic, and it gets tiring after a while. I wouldn't mind if it was more like a couple times a month and I'd join in occasionally in that case, but every day is a bit much.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/21 05:52 PM
5

I feel like when people talk about "daily weed smokers", they don't talk about how much and how often. It's like grouping alcoholics in with people who have a single glass of wine with dinner most nights. Smoking a small amount most evenings to relax, have no problem skipping it if they're out late doing something social = probably fine, although not something I would want personally in a relationship. Smoking in the morning, going to work high, or coming home from work every day and getting tot…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/21 05:22 PM
7

Your reply to Fleischpeitsch basically gets it - women are already very aware of the precautions we need to take to avoid being raped and we're just sick of hearing about them. Women already know the points on the many lists like this and follow them. Even though men often call women paranoid and misandrist for worrying about stuff like this! Honestly I think the idea of a woman who literally believes she should take zero precautions against male violence is mostly an MRA fantasy. Also, programs…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/21 12:53 PM
2

I don't have kids yet, but I think I would teach them the basics about stuff like consent and safety, and then give advice on their individual relationship problems as they came up. Making sure they are well-socialized (stuff like limiting screen time and making them participate in sports) and have healthy self-esteem and a secure attachment are probably more helpful than giving them specific advice on dating. I don't think you can prevent your kids from ever having a toxic relationship, and try…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/21 11:06 AM
4

I've never understood these arguments because like... we already do understand that young adults are easy to take advantage of in general, and encourage them to seek advice from older adults on big life decisions like that? If you're under 25 and have a good relationship with your parents or another older adult role model, you probably will actually ask their opinion before buying a car or accepting a job offer. No one thinks it's infantilizing to say that an unscrupulous boss knows that a 20-ye…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/21 02:39 PM
16

If they're making men feel uncomfortable/threatened from their advances, even if he'd be open to the same behavior from Stacy, then yes that is creepy. I think in general the threshold for women to be creepy is a lot higher, because women are both much less likely to be a threat and more likely to be aware of social norms, but yeah women can occasionally be creepy too.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/21 01:12 PM
1

I was diagnosed with ADHD in my early teens. Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/21 11:19 AM
17

I've got chad friends who I've seen do things that would get me labeled a creep if I tried it just because they are good looking. Knowing how people respond to you based on your looks is a type of EQ. If you're ugly and act like you're hot, you have a poor understanding of social rules, and people find that creepy. Also often those attractive men are responding to subtle IOIs that less attractive men don't get as often.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/21 11:07 AM
2

Oh god I can't stand people like this. Sure there's some guys who do nothing but jack off and play video games who need to be pushed out of their comfort zone to do something productive with their free time, but the opposite extreme is just as insufferable. Women (well, people) find accomplishments impressive, but they also want to be around people who are happy and chill and enjoying life. It's just exhausting to be around people who are so pompous about being productive that they can't even un…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/21 10:52 AM
17

There's some reversal in the trend of men earning more than women in one specific demographic - unmarried, childless women under 30 who live in cities are outearning their male counterparts. As to why the discrepancy exists in other demographics: The drop in women's wages after having children is huge Controlling for education, women still earn a lot less than men. Men here will probably say "that's because women choose to go into lower-paying fields", but there's also evidence that pay in a fie…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/21 09:37 AM
6

This is awful, but why is it feminism's job to do anything about? Feminism is about women's problems, no matter what some male-pandering feminists say. Maybe MRAs can do something productive for once and protest this?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/21 08:43 AM
8

Men want women to rate themselves lower so they'll "have to" date their "looksmatch", as if women actually approach deciding who to date like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/21 09:53 AM
–

Sometimes I wonder how women can really be this dumb about men's insecurities, then I remember that time I asked my 5'8" ex why he was so much shorter than his 6'2" brother. I don't even know what response I was expecting anyone to have to "why are you short?" lol
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/21 09:41 AM
9

That's not the same argument - I'm not saying that users of the website are not representative of cheaters in general. I'm saying that knowing that 29% of cheating men are in the trades is a useless number unless you know how many men are in the trades. If 29% of all men are in the trades (not too unreasonable to assume, depending on your definition of "trades"), then men in the trades would be just as likely as any random guy to cheat, not more likely. Even if they're slightly more or slightly …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/21 06:07 PM
63

Did no one notice that this said "men who cheat (using this website) are most likely to work in the trades" and not "men who work in the trades are most likely to cheat"? It says nothing about which careers are more likely to cheat because it's not normalized for the number of men, cheating and not-cheating, in each career. Without that information, it's literally just a list of common careers.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/21 05:11 PM
2

yeah we should also question the capacity to do other things like signing a contract, getting a loan ect. I mean... we do? It's pretty commonly acknowledged that military recruiters, college loans, etc. are predatory. Ive seen women here use the terms predatory, abusive, creepy ect for even more tame gaps like early mid 30s pairung with early mid 20s. Because they usually are. This isn't some theory women invented sitting at home because they were mad at men being attracted to youth. This is an …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/21 07:06 AM
6

I always assumed "be yourself" was more directed at people who are capable of being socially competent and fun around their friends, but become awkward and tongue-tied around someone they're interested in. It's not relevant to men who actually need self-improvement because it was never directed at them in the first place. I've gotten this advice a lot, not around dating but other social situations, because I'm very lively and silly around people who I know well, but shy and withdrawn around new …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/21 11:53 AM
4

Is it normal to not say what you mean? is that the state of the world? No offense meant, but are you on the spectrum? Of course it's normal to not say what you mean in some situations. No neurotypical person says literally exactly what they mean all the time - indirect communication serves an important social function.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/21 11:48 AM
2

It's not UBI no, but I just mentioned it because the idea of free money for raising children is probably totally foreign to Americans outside of welfare for the poor. If a country did actually implement UBI, I highly doubt it would not include payments to the parents for each child they had. edit: which is relevant to the OP's point because if the child's expenses come from the child's UBI and not the parent's, then there would be no point to having child support
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/21 12:44 PM
1

The parent(s) would get the money for raising a child. If you determine that an adult needs $X for their basic life expenses, that wouldn't be enough for the child's basic life expenses too, so you give them an extra $Y to pay for that. We already have something similar to that here in Germany. Not enough to totally pay for a kid, but everyone gets ~200 euros a month for each child under 18 they have, regardless of their income.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/21 12:38 PM
4

Having had an eating disorder, there is no shortage of men who are into women who are too underweight to ovulate (which is a weird preference to have developed from an evolutionary perspective, but OK), but they're way more likely to be controlling and abusive. Men who want a healthy relationship are generally not interested in women who always get dizzy on walks and have panic attacks in restaurants. Being told you're "tiny" by men who would be just as attracted to you if you put on 20 lbs is n…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/21 12:09 PM
17

Frankly I think anyone who has the slightest degree of social intuition can tell if someone isn't really into them, if they're honest with themselves. If they ignore that gut feeling, it's probably either because they're too infatuated to think clearly, or because they have low self-esteem and think they don't deserve better. This is one of the reasons why, despite that I agree with FDS on some things, I think some of their "vetting" methods like seeing if he pays for everything or holding out o…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/21 01:31 PM
36

Women like analyzing human relationships in general. Some women stick to gossiping with their friends or debating the relationships of their favorite celebrities or in their favorite TV show. This sub is an appealing way to discuss relationships for women who at least one of cerebral, autistic, or argumentative.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/21 12:05 PM
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