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ectoplasmic1 Archive

View 0 posts and 23 comments by ectoplasmic1 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

22 year old me: "I want to have sex with a really hot woman". 32 year old me: "I want to have sex with someone I love". They're going to leave eventually and they'll never love you the way you love them. Negative assumptions. Why apply for a job? You won't get it. It won't suit you, it'll never work out. Marriage and children are too risky, so what's the point? I know many people alive right now, friends, who are proving this not true. People can be happy in these situations, they regularly and …
/r/askTRP10/08/18 03:23 PM
2

Sorry you had a negative experience. It seems like you built a powerful story in your head along the lines of "women will always cheat" - and whether by chance, or the natural attraction of our belief systems for self-confirming evidence - you have gathered together a lot of evidence that supports your story. You are also using a lot of dramatic wording. Like your brain is panicking and you allow yourself to be very emotional about things. Bring in the self-awareness to know that you have seen o…
/r/askTRP03/08/18 05:09 AM
6

I don't agree that men and women are that different. Get an attractive girl, start getting text messages from her, maybe get intimate with her.. what happens next? You want her texts. You get pissed when she mentions another guy she thinks is 'cool'. You get pissed if she doesn't call for a few days. People love attention. If your pursuing girls with tons of orbiters you're pursuing a specific kind of woman, the female equivalent of a 'player'. They thrive off sexual attention and are probably t…
/r/askTRP22/07/18 03:21 AM
2

I'd believe her if I were you. The person is trying to be honest, at least I would roll with that assumption. Try to build a connection. Once you get out of this bubble the guys here are in, and understand what meaningless sexual connections are - you'll see her point of view clearly. She probably means what she says.
/r/askTRP22/07/18 12:55 AM
1

Well, our conversation is certainly finished now. Good luck.
/r/askTRP10/07/18 08:19 PM
1

Dude, I don't really care what you do. Go out and pursue women if you want. Or work on yourself. Up to you.
/r/askTRP10/07/18 07:12 PM
1

Well my dude, you can continue exploring relationships with women while you deepen your relationship with yourself. I myself took a whole 5 to 7 years off of dating and relationships (for real!) and spent that time working on myself. I also had a traumatic past. That's an extreme length of time, but I think a shorter stint could be good for anyone. Get happy with yourself. Fill your own cup. etc. etc. If you feel cut off within yourself, then right now, there isn't a whole lot you can share with…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 06:13 PM
1

Well, I have to disagree with you there, regardless of how negative your experiences have been. I don't have any emotions I can understand how it might feel like you have no emotions, but you can trust me, you have them. Even in reading your reply, I sense a deep current of sadness. That is an emotion. Beneath that emotion there are many, many more. Imagine a thick layer of numbness and beneath that, an even thicker layer of negative emotions, which are caked over yet another layer of positive o…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 05:43 PM
1

It kind of shows your belief system around mating and dating, which is "this is an algorithmic problem that I can solve by my behaviors". In my experience, this is not true. I suggest stopping trying to hack people's feelings and emotions, and rather, training yourself to reflexively accept them. Accept what other people feel, accept their acceptance or rejection. It is what it is. By treating it like its a hackable thing, you train yourself to not accept it, to try to game it. Just push on unti…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 05:32 PM
1

Thank you, I appreciate the appreciation. What does your username mean if I may ask? Are you completely self-fufilled now? If so, how has it changed your life? Well, fulfillment is fulfilling, haha. So, its by definition pretty much a very good thing! Completely self-fulfilled? No, but increasingly, more and more self-fulfilled. I just take more and more joy from life regardless of other people and circumstances. I'm discovering there are very few hard limits on the amount of enjoyment one can a…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 05:15 PM
1

Thank you, I can explain that term. Please don't take this personal because what I'm about to describe is pretty much the default human position, its totally normal, and getting over it / moving beyond it can take decades. Its a delicate thing. When you seriously hunger and thirst for another person to give you something (in this case, female affection) - it can sometimes place a kind of distorting magnetic force field onto interactions. One's hunger can be a very strong force, one's needs. This…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 04:54 PM
1

here's my view of things, take it with a pinch of salt. To be feared is a terrible feeling. It is very alienating. I assume that when you say 'to be feared', you are using it as a proxy for wanting to say 'to be respected'. Its good to be respected. Being feared feels quite bad, as I said. To be loved? That feels very good, generally. It is also compatible with respect. To be loved and feared? Those things are not really compatible because they produce a schizophrenic response in the person who …
/r/askTRP10/07/18 04:46 PM
1

This is neuroticism, which is a fancy word for meaningless, circular self-doubt. Just go out, you have a golden opportunity. You know she likes you. There is no real leader frame, unless one is emasculated to the point of having no drive or self-assertion at all, which is the case for a few but not many dudes. Don't waste your time disproving that negative view of yourself. Just go out with her, assume the best, have a good time, and see if you connect and want to pursue things further. Good luc…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 04:12 PM
1

She may be perceiving the vibe of your interest in her, and speaking preemptively to stop you from making an advance. She may be unnecessarily nervous around men and acting in mild freak out mode. I would read this as you not broadcasting a sufficiently comfortable and confident vibe to assure her that you were "safe", e.g. that you wouldn't suddenly surprise this random stranger with a reference to your unmet romantic needs. That's kind of brutal for me to say, since you kinda can't help it, an…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 04:08 PM
1

Here's some rough and ready advice, take with a pinch of salt. Drop the autism label. I know a lot of serious sounding adults are parroting it, but its not correct or helpful. Having some social difficulties doesn't mean you have a disease that needs a name. You're growing into larger social awareness and that's it. Lots of people struggle with dating and relationships - normal people. Don't label yourself, it will have negative subconscious consequences and be something you have to reverse late…
/r/askTRP10/07/18 03:39 PM
2

What's wrong with the nice guy trap? I'm a seasoned nice guy, and I fall in that trap all the time. Doesn't look like a trap to me - looks like a nest! I'm having fun down here, cantcha see?! Seriously, my perspective is, it doesn't sound like this guy is a lot of fun. Sounds kind of on a power trip or something. Just giving him what he wants - which is apparently control, in a social sense - gets you off the hook from having to deal with his unpleasantness. Let him be the big man. You can be "D…
/r/askTRP29/06/18 02:16 PM
3

I think by "losing frame" what the writers are trying to point to is a state of hypnotized, knee-jerk autopilot subservience, which one falls into when "dazzled by the lights" of another. Its a state where I guess one kind of forgets oneself, and falls into simple admiration for the other person. I suppose it describes a kind of "giving without receiving" which allows for unreciprocated relationship exchanges, which I think the people on this sub are trying to avoid. If this concept is understoo…
/r/askTRP29/06/18 02:04 PM
1

There's a temptation in life to praise or condemn our choices in hindsight, but I find its more helpful to view everything as a choice - a choice that has consequences. Its just a choice. Some choices bring more happiness, other choices bring more sadness. Either way, you learn and grow through making choices. Life is very forgiving, so even if you make what appear to be 'bad choices' - in the long run you will still be OK. I think you may have learned some things about impulsiveness (destroying…
/r/askTRP24/06/18 04:48 PM
1

Sometimes you are just not her type. Same as for you.
/r/askTRP21/06/18 07:55 PM
1

Plans are good, but they are more about managing your own anxiety, than they are about realizing dreams. This ultra-specific read through of future events? Not likely to happen. That vague feeling of desire and ambition inside your chest? Very likely to have its day and carve a path in the world that is beyond what we can guess. You can know nothing, just like the rest of us.
/r/askTRP20/06/18 11:26 PM
2

You can play with the mindset that the feelings that arise during sobriety, are meaningful broadcasts from your self, to your self, that you would profit by listening to. In other words, within the feelings you run from, are concealed precious gems. When integrated, they will unfold to reveal parts of yourself that you never thought existed: deeper, more soulful feelings, intuition, psychic and mental abilities, strength of character - and all this is revealed through the discipline of acknowled…
/r/askTRP20/06/18 11:17 PM
3

There's not really a way to reliably do this. There's several courses of action that make it like a 20% probability that something vaguely similar to what you mentioned, would happen. Instead of "addicted" think "interested". Basically have meaningful conversations with her.
/r/askTRP20/06/18 11:14 PM
1

One thing you can do is observe yourself and study the things that trigger you emotionally. Then ask yourself why they trigger you, and journal the responses. Within time, you'll develop a map of your mind. Working through those things, is a life-long task. But worthwhile.
/r/askTRP20/06/18 08:41 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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