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educatedkoala Archive

View 0 posts and 62 comments by educatedkoala on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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9

There's either one of two problems: you're not nice to people in general, or women specifically. You say it's just women, but none of us can tell that for sure because we don't know you. People who aren't nice usually don't realize this about themselves - people rarely try to be unkind. If this is your problem, it would an excellent thing to discuss with the privacy of a therapist as none of us can really help you. If it really is women in particular... the fact that you said "how do I find the …
/r/ExRedPill09/03/26 07:04 PM
1

Sort of? It's more like... she found the other guy "smash right away" hot. That comes with some positives (i.e. he gets laid right away more easily, and has more opportunity to explore more than that than someone without this quality) but it could also mean he doesn't have the kind of attributes or qualities she would want to pursue more than just that with. The kind of guy who can and would smash right away, knows how hot they are, etc. are often not boyfriend/husband material. Personally, I've…
/r/ExRedPill11/02/26 12:05 AM
2

I think you did get the point, but didn't quite connect all the dots! I mentioned Brad Pitt because I think he's the most attractive celebrity. He's not "my type" so the chances of me wanting to date a Brad Pitt are small, but I still like it enough that I'd sleep with him just because of what he looks like. Wanting to do that doesn't make me less attracted to my preferred type. My preferred type doesn't make brad pitt less attractive to me. The point was that comparing is quite useless. You can…
/r/ExRedPill10/02/26 09:38 PM
5

You're looking for "body count" to solve the issue. That woman would have been just as attracted to you with a body count of 0 as she would at 100. The biggest factor in change of her attitude towards you is going to be what's going on in the rest of her life. Chances are, you are never going to be 100% perfect for anyone. And those couples that seem to have that? That love is built and grown, preferences changed over time, for each other. Natural, initial attraction? It doesn't matter! It's sub…
/r/ExRedPill09/02/26 10:31 PM
1

The people I've been the most compatible with are triple digit people like me. Idk it ultimately doesn't matter in the end but I prefer them to have had a couple dozen sexual partners at least? It's not a requirement or anything, but I think the likelihood that we're sexually compatible goes up with experience. Low body count tends to scream insecurity.
/r/ExRedPill09/02/26 10:07 PM
2

In an absolute worst case scenario -- there are very few men who can't overcome genetics with being in shape, style, and a good personality. If you throw in career and budget, cosmetic procedures can fix the edge cases. I'd say it's a mindset and a reflection of discipline.
/r/ExRedPill04/03/25 07:22 AM
5

I'm happy if I die alone, I do enjoy my friends and career and hobbies. If I meet someone I like who seems perfectly compatible, I'll date. But I like myself and my life at default too much to compromise right now, which successful dating requires
/r/ExRedPill01/02/25 06:30 PM
3

That is one woman's opinion. There will be more who think like her, and many who don't, men and woman alike. Why tie yourself to their opinions in any way? They don't matter. Don't let one person affect the rest of your life (confidence) when there are so many who disagree if you keep looking.
/r/ExRedPill05/11/24 07:49 PM
1

Parenthood is a dealbreaker for me. I got sterilized knowing I don't want children ever. My sister has spent 15 years in medical education. She doesn't want to birth a child, but she wants to be a step parent. It just depends on what your goals are. So I'd just clarify this and say you should decide your parental goals agnostic of your partner, and only date people who already align with your goals. Don't "put up with" kids or the other way around because you want the person
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 04:06 PM
1

Yes. External validation certainly doesn't hurt, but I could have a scarred and melted face and I'd still dress the same
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 03:58 PM
3

On the rare occasion someone has asked me, they haven't cared. I think it's pretty obvious without asking & just from knowing me (sex clubs, orgy parties, all sorts of very promiscuous stories). So I don't think men get far enough to be invested or interested in me unless it doesn't bother them. The only time anyone has ever cared, he had extremely minimal experience personally, and I think that was why it bothered him. I'm still active in that lifestyle too (in my 30s) but no kids, no one cares…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/24 02:21 PM
5

I feel like this may be one of those situations where your algorithm is biasing what you see. Women couldn't leave their partners for centuries... endless criticism after they finally could. My mom got a divorce from someone physically abusing her, she has scars from it and everything, and lost her entire community because she was no longer invited/welcome post divorce. So when she met my dad, she moved/aligned with his family instead, as they were out of town. Women not being criticized for lea…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 11:06 AM
1

I see a correlation with financial success more than attractive levels.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 11:12 PM
1

Maybe they're stopping the search because they're tired of men whose company does not compete with their solitude? Men aren't single by choice generally, it really feels like that's what's coming through in your post. I have so many hobbies and friends that I'm perfectly content dying alone, I don't see any need to sacrifice an ounce of my comfort for a man unless everything just happens to work out perfectly 🤷‍♀️
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 04:40 PM
1

It is literally no wonder y'all struggle with this if you can't take the time to even learn about another perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/24 10:54 PM
-1

I highly recommend you read more into mental load for domestic labor and decision fatigue, because it's not able to be strictly contained within 8-5
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/24 09:46 PM
3

After the 8-5 hours are over, housework should be mutual. Domestic labor shouldn't be a 24/7 job while the other is only working 8-5
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/24 05:45 PM
0

Be in shape and dress well.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/24 12:25 PM
2

Compersion can be used outside of sexual contexts as well despite its origin. Serves a useful place in the English language as we don't really have other good ways to describe that sentiment.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/24 04:37 PM
0

Right, hotwifing is probably the most cuck-adjacent without the degradation aspects. It's part of swinging also, and there are more. My experience swinging is that it's almost celebratory, like "look at you go, look at how much x is loving you" and it's a shared sentiment. I'm willing to try and have tried most everything. What I've found exploring humiliation/degradation is that the person matters immensely. Aftercare is really important, and it's kind of insane how intimate it can feel to trus…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/24 03:02 PM
1

I've met a few people into cucking. They were actually all incredibly phenomenal people -- well adjusted, confident, and secure in a way you don't normally see. It's just a bedroom kink, not a personality. Let the haters hate 🤷‍♀️
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/24 02:30 PM
8

Cucking has an intentional, fetishized degree of degradation to it. "Compersion" is the word sex communities use for enjoying your partner having pleasure, even when it doesn't come from you. Swinging, poly, hotwifing, and more are other sexual lifestyles that involve compersion but without the degradation aspects of cucking. Since that's what separates cucking from these other lifestyles, it makes sense that's what conclusions people draw when they can't relate to the kink personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/24 02:19 PM
1

I've never had a boyfriend taller than me, but that's just chance as I don't seek out men based on their looks and prioritize characteristics. I don't let my fear of men influence anything other than whether or not I give men the chance of an initial conversation. Once I've had that conversation, I judge based on the person in front of me. I'm also just not that afraid. I've been raped several times, the only thing that could be worse is... something with permanent, non mental damage. I think th…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/24 06:34 PM
3

I recently had a man come up to me and say "hey, excuse me, do you have a minute" and then he sat down next to me. I already knew where things were going then, but the next thing he said was "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable and I'm happy to leave if this does, but" and he paused a little bit to give me time to interject, and the "I was just wondering if I could get your name?" it was incredibly sweet and I felt very safe. I was happy to chat with him for a bit and give him my number after…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/24 10:12 AM
1

It sounds like you're not dating people who are very compatible with you. I never said the guy I was with was unattractive. He was just a friend I hadn't seen that way until that moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 09:01 PM
37

Multiple failed relationships leave some women (over?) valuing very specific qualities, primarily the main things that went wrong or were the most stressful from past relationships. It becomes easier to compromise on this or that for those qualities. Some have to do with the bedroom, some have to do with living together, some are personality traits. I remember dating a guy just because he put a band aid on my finger when I cut myself in the kitchen. I basically fell in love right there, because …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/24 03:27 PM
2

Trust me, I understand that. So what are your options then? Just be lonely, resentful, and complain that you don't fit the rule? Or just... Do what you can? Work what you have, not what you don't have.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/24 08:18 PM
0

I exclusively like lean twinky men, at biggest a "soccer player build". I don't care about height (5'9", dated a 5'5" man for a decade, mostly date around my height now just by chance, but never reject a good man for his height). I have no issue finding romance books where men are not described the way you're talking about, although that's obviously a lot of them. Read a diversity of books to find different things that appeal to a diversity of women! There's no one size fits all. Besides, there'…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/24 03:59 PM
1

I've survived enough SA and rape, no reason to fear it now, don't wanna lose what I have
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/24 03:09 PM
1

If it seems like we might do it again or be friends or continue to talk, I prefer honesty. If we're clearly never interacting again, then say whatever you want, I'm probably pretending too
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/24 10:06 PM
2

Vent about a friends' story (make one up) that is adjacent to something you actually want to talk about. Tell her it's just on your mind and you needed to get it off your chest. You'll be able to tell if you can tell her your actual stuff based on her reaction
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/24 01:08 AM
1

A guy asked me on a third date. He was very wealthy (had a barley farm that sold to breweries, status and looks were definitely not a problem. He would always spend the whole time going off about conservative agendas, how poor people deserve to be poor, how little he pays his workers. His little brain could not comprehend why I wasn't interested in him - I had given him a couple chances in case he wasn't really like that and was just trying to show off, but no more. And he was clearly not used t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/24 12:57 PM
7

Few if any women want to date or have sex with a man who will fuck anything. Those men are particularly at risk for STIs and terrible, unsatisfying sex. Careful, you're criticizing OP for his generalizations while making your own! I just wanted to say that the women who do want to fuck anything definitely don't mind the men who also do. I'm a weird demographic - nonmonogamous, go to sex clubs, orgy parties, swinger resorts, etc. in my experience, the hyper sexual communities are actually some of…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/24 09:35 PM
1

I'm choosing the bear with the hope it's horny 🙏
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/24 04:32 PM
–

This is entirely discretionary and why individual people have their own standards. You're allowed to have higher ones. It's the collective of men's desperation that allows the disparity you see - be the change you want to see man.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/24 01:38 AM
2

Can you not use a toy to speed things along?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/24 12:44 PM
1

I've broken up with people for: Not being liberal and/or a vocal advocate for civil rights and liberties Not being plant based or willing to eat this way at home Only cleaning when expecting guests instead of regular habits Not playing league of legends Not waking up early in the mornings I could keep going. But it's my life, I'm happy alone. So if a partner makes my life harder, I just end up deciding I would rather be alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/24 12:42 PM
–

I had 60 last year. I also go to sex parties tho so I'm skewing the numbers.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 03:50 PM
2

I never let anyone pay for my dates because I believe equality goes both ways. Should always be split fairly. I don't know any other women who see things that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/24 12:21 PM
–

Men rely on their partners for more psychological needs than women do for their partners, because women get closer to their friends (in terms of emotional availability) than men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 06:06 PM
0

I'm sure this is a component. In my experience, the vast majority of women who don't have a good sex life with their husbands, it has to do with house chores.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/24 12:52 PM
1

Well I suppose maybe not "an algorithm thing" but more of a biased selection of news sources. You could make fair conclusions about how X or Y demographic group responds to a political issue based on the comments left on news posts, but if you're only looking at right-wing media news sources, it's not really going to represent the population either. I would refrain from drawing conclusions without making fake profiles on a few infidelity based dating apps/sites, as you'll see predominantly men. …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/24 01:08 AM
2

I think this might be an algorithm thing for you, because I see the opposite. If you make dating app profiles (fake) for both genders on infidelity sites it appears to be mostly men. Maybe female cheaters just are more willing to discuss, which is consistent with behavioral patterns across genders for... basically everything?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 08:25 PM
2

As a woman I do this a lot. I'm generally the most sober. Most of the time I'm doing a safety check, to make sure my friend wants to be in that conversation, not trying to stop it. Sometimes it's a girl's night and we there's some sort of agreement that we're not there to go home with strangers. Sometimes they're in relationships and I'm trying to make sure they don't fuck that up without embarrassing them. Sometimes it's a safety check because the guy seems really drunk, perhaps a little pushy,…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 06:20 PM
2

This is a really difficult question to answer. I am far, far, FAR more willing than the average person to take matches on apps as a friendship first, long term invest into a mutual understanding. As a poly person, if you do this with every monogamous/open minded person who is interested in you, one of two things happen: 1) You burn yourself out on attempting dating mono, or 2) get so tired you don't do the explanation/introduction of poly its justice/fairness. And this is obvs ignoring people wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 05:07 AM
2

I've been in polyamorous relationships for a decade now. I've definitely noticed an increase lately. If someone ENM swipes/is interested in you as a monogamous person -- chances are they're pretty inexperienced with poly (most people who do it healthily, sustainably, etc. do not get involved with mono partners), so tread carefully
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 10:52 PM
1

I like to have a perception of whether or not they're finally stable, what their date budget region might be, if they're a risk to need to depend on me for money, etc. I have a very good career and make more than most people my age (30) and I don't care what they make as long as they're stable. I wouldn't really be interested in someone who is, say, a DJ or EMT, because I like consistent and regular work hours that align their schedule with mine. Some careers tie you to locations or types of cit…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/24 08:13 PM
1

You can be extremely promiscuous and still expect the opposite from a partner. Your expectations can be whatever you want them to be! You just need to be wary of: 1) Not framing your personal preference as a way that all women should be that way or that it makes a woman better in any way. It's your preference, that's it. 2) Being realistic and accepting of how having a preference might limit your dating options without blaming culture for it. For example I'm a vegan and it hurts my options signi…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/24 08:43 PM
1

When one partner doesn't do any housework without the other one telling them it needs to be done and when, it builds up. It simply does not matter if you two agreed to this dynamic or not -- when cleaning up after a partner feels the same as cleaning up after a child, you're going to feel like your partner is a child and lose attraction. The constant mental state of remembering to buy more X, to change out the Y, etc. is exhausting to do for the household.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/24 08:31 PM
1

Absolutely! The thing is, I don't want to date. Even if I accidentally catch feelings for someone I just let them pass. There's too much going on in my life, I don't need/want a partner until I sort some things out. When I'm looking to date, and find the right person, I'll put effort into a working sexual relationship and growing together. That's just not where I'm at now.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/24 07:06 PM
10

I am very sexually active. From my POV: as soon as I have any interest in a man, I want to know as early as possible if we're sexually compatible or not. I don't want to risk falling in love with someone and then being stuck in a sexually unfulfilling relationship. So personally what ends up happening is that I'll text and have conversations for quite a long time, because I'm making up my mind on whether I want to sleep with them. Once I decide I want to, I will ask them on a date, and suggest m…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/24 06:18 PM
25

Being well dressed and fit is half the battle. If you can be funny also, it won't be that hard. Being social and outgoing in general. Sleeping around doesn't mean you can't also be sincere. I think most women like myself who enjoy sleeping around still like the interactions to feel kind and thoughtful. I want to connect enough that it feels like there could be a connection, but I don't actually want to pursue that. So for example I'll still take dating app conversations very slow, have a dinner …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/24 06:07 PM
7

I don't understand why this is a problem. I have very specific needs for partnership. I fully understand how unlikely it is I'll ever find someone who checks every box. But I love my alone time, and I don't need partnership. As long as I have friends, I'm fulfilled. I don't understand why that's problematic. I often feel like if men had the same perspective, it would very much help the toxicity in the dating scene. If men (well, all people, really) didn't need partnership so much and instead wer…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 06:05 PM
5

There is definitely a cultural aspect where women are less willing to do so. I am not denying that by any means. However, this is extremely hard to quantify or study. So I'd rather look at factors that might explain why they are less likely. A huge factor is women's capacity to be able to provide (your scenario didn't cover whether or not her income was capable of doing so comfortably). There's a lot of different ways to break down the factors of the gender wage gap that "women make 80 cents to …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 03:40 PM
–

Why are the birth rates below replacement in all of the west? Increased education is a big factor in birth rates. COL is getting out of control and it's becoming increasingly hard to have kids. Awareness of how difficult pregnancy and parenthood can be, and the lack of scientific advancements in gynecology and obstetrics play a part. This only affects modern dating if having a child is a must for you. Cultures change for all sorts of reasons. Dating will always be difficult if you are in a minor…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 01:17 PM
1

When I was 21, I dated a 56 year old and had a very meaningful relationship my last year of college. I'd say that as long as you have a good career (don't have to be loaded, just stable) and are in shape, it never really is?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/24 04:20 PM
1

I don't want to develop feelings for someone and then find out we're sexually incompatible. I only want to date them if we are. Therefore, I've got to have casual sex to figure that out, and then move forward with emotional intimacy. How do I know what my sexual needs are, and how important they are to me? By having lots and lots of casual sex, being exposed to different body types and styles and bedroom activities. If I had done things your way, then I'd have always been a wife who borderlined …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/24 09:35 AM
1

If you're judging based off looks alone then I've settled. I don't see it that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/24 05:53 PM
9

I would look at the comments she gets on her Instagram posts. Do you see other girls hyping each other up using that emoji? Look at the photos her friends have posted with her - I guarantee you'll see her using that emoji to compliment them
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/24 08:18 PM
15

So? She probably sees the fact that she's treating you the way she would treat any friend regardless of their gender as more respectful than changing her behavioral patterns because of gender. She's just being a person dude. You're the one who is making it all something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/24 07:42 PM
21

Women hype each other up like this all the time. She's just treating you as she would treat a friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/24 07:21 PM
3

I'm 5'9" woman, make $150k, in shape at 130 lbs, own a home, am 29. I'm also ranked top 1% in a couple particular competitive video games! Regret not going pro when I was a teenager but I had no idea video games would ever be something cool, much less something to make money off of. I have no kids also, never will. That seems to make me ineligible for most men, but I'm also in that percentage for not having a uterus (anymore!). I'll keep happily enjoying my life, waiting for the perfect one, bec…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/24 09:00 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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