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espressolover18 Archive

View 0 posts and 121 comments by espressolover18 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

just get him a few items of clothes you like you think he'd wear as a gift. then compliment him enthusiastically when he wears them, saying how handsome he looks and how it turns you on, etc.
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/22 04:36 AM
1

Any advice on how to avoid getting enthusiastic too quickly? This is one is tough because, at least for me, it's not a specific thing or specific set of strategies, but rather a general mindset I have when going into dating. I don't know where you met this guy or where you're meeting men in general, but especially if you're on dating apps, go in with a mindset that you're looking for red flags and green flags. Go in with a mindset that you will be nice and sweet BUT you will be observing and con…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 10:12 PM
1

NO.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 09:01 PM
1

Nope, don't wait for him. Don't tell him that you're willing to wait around until he's figured out his ass from his thumb. Just move on. If you must text him, text him something like "sorry it didn't work out, good luck" and then delete his number.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 08:18 PM
1

I think you're correct in your thinking, but I get the feeling that you put A LOT of thought, emotion, future hopes, etc. into this guy, which was completely unwarranted because it's SO early. I understand you have massive insecurities about relationships, and I'm sure you really really want to find a great guy and this guy probably seemed great at first and you got your hopes up, but were still scared, but really wanted it to work, so you waited 2 weeks without dating other people (even though …
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 08:17 PM
1

I agree with you, but telling him he's lying isn't a good look, especially this early in a relationship/datingship. The fact that she's immediatley jumping to "he's lying to me" instead of "meh, alright, on to the next" in what is ultimately a very new and still very uninvolved dynamic makes it seem like she's coming on too strong, or bringing a ton of baggage this early on.
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 08:10 PM
1

I think he may have certain goals for himself and feels like a failure or like he's not a success yet if he hasn't achieved them. I think that's a pretty masculine characteristic, actually. So I think that being there to support him in his goals might help. Like others have said, also focus on what YOU like about him, but I think showing that you are willing to be a partner in his life and be there to support him in achieving his goals will A) help him move forward in that direction which will m…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 08:05 PM
1

I hope it works out but, in addition to his general immaturity and chaos, a HUGE red flag that jumps out at me is the fact the sees friendships and people in general as replaceable. I can understand a 26 year old guy thinking of fuck buddies and relationships as replaceable, but friends? and people in general? I'm not trying to diagnose some internet stranger, but that immediately makes me think of NPD or sociopathic tendencies - NOT saying he is a narcissist or pscyho/sociopath, but I do not th…
/r/RedPillWomen26/08/22 07:50 PM
0

Ok, so it's not a intrinsically masculine thing just their dynamic.... it sounded like you were saying "what would women do if men weren't around to take out the trash??"
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/22 08:15 PM
2

I never knew that taking out the garbage was a masculine trait. What is the criteria for that? Dirtiness, gross food scraps? Does that mean washing dishes and doing laundry are also masculine traits (they also get rid of leftover food debris and dirt).
/r/RedPillWomen19/08/22 01:19 AM
3

he's oblivious to you and your needs, which is a kind of selfishness. he lives in a bubble of *HIMSELF* and only really thinks of you if you knock and say "hey, remember me?"
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/22 11:02 AM
7

No, I understand where you're coming from. I don't entirely agree, but I understand your points. With the fatness, I guess how fat are we talking? If it's a little chub, I don't see that as a personality default - it could be due to a lot of things: more sedentary lifestyle (interests in typical feminine/womanly hobbies like arts and crafts, baking, painting, etc etc etc being a girly girl who doesn't like to get too sweaty or play rough), it could be stress due to whatever reason, it could be w…
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/22 10:40 PM
12

I think because girls are girls, not guys. So we tend to see it from our perspective. We think of our fat friends, who are hilarious and have great personalities, and we see their beauty, and we think any semi-decent guy would too - and if they dont, if they're rejecting her just because she's fat then they're obviously pervy misogynists. They don't see it from the guy's perspective, where if there are hundreds of attractive, slim girls in a dimly-lit space with blaring music, they're going for …
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/22 05:25 PM
6

if you dont want kids, and he seems like the typical traditional, masculine, conservative provider guy, chances are he does, so you need to let him know how you feel
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/22 07:56 AM
1

huge turn off for me. But what's most important is how YOU feel about. Do you like it? Or do you find it off-putting? That's more important than what the rest of an internet community thinks and feels about it.
/r/RedPillWomen05/08/22 02:40 AM
1

plus they're inherently "POC" so it's a win-win
/r/RedPillWomen05/08/22 02:37 AM
5

I’m in a marriage that’s picture perfect except for [one thing] ​ it’s destroyed my mental health, I’m constantly paranoid, I cry daily just randomly, I’m so depressed, I’ve started hating everything about myself. It’s the most miserable thing I’ve ever endured. I wish I had left the first time he ever hinted at being unfaithful, before we were even married. I wish I had walked away and never looked back. It’s too late for me if that's an (almost) picture-perfect marriage, I'd hate see what an a…
/r/RedPillWomen29/07/22 12:10 AM
2

burn more calories than you ingest. are you drinking your calories? Alcohol, sugary/creamy coffees, sodas, juices, slurpees, sugar in tea, etc? find ways to fit more movement into you day: make an effort to walk more - go for walks! Park further and get extra steps in. take the stairs over the escalator or elevator. Make an audit of your diet. Do you eat a lot of candy/sweets, junk food, fast food, prepackaged foods, fatty meats, lots of cream/butter/cheese? Try to start eating more fresh produc…
/r/RedPillWomen27/07/22 04:30 AM
8

get a rich husband 🤣
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/22 08:33 PM
2

I found messages of him initiating the Brazil guys trip to one of his friends because saw a YouTube video (titled “Women like this is what makes men travel to Brazil”) and there was "thick women walking around everywhere".
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/22 12:03 PM
4

... him literally talking about meeting hot thic Brazilian women...?
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/22 11:11 AM
1

oh ok. Well, I'm sorry he's suddenly made such an about-face.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/22 11:11 AM
-1

there's zero reason to bring up money or your job. masculine men don't care what your job/education/achievements/income are, as long you have something going on in your life that you are interested/passionate about. Not that your job/education/achievements/income are a turn-off for decent, kind, high value men; they just aren't particularly impressed by those. ​ like someone else said, if being a fit freak and spending so much time at the gym and eating a special diet still isn't giving you the …
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/22 02:10 AM
2

Have you thought about talking to a therapist? Therapy can be very beneficial in helping us process our emotions and past experiences that may have led to these emotions. It can be very helpful to talk to someone who is a neutral third party and can provide an outside - and professional - perspective and give you tools to manage your issues. These tools can be mental/emotional (helping you reframe certain things), behavioral (mind-body therapy like NFT and others), or chemical/supplements (presc…
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/22 04:59 PM
8

Others here have given you good advice, however I think it's also good to keep in mind that he may not be willing to accept this new lifestyle and change. You met him when you were in the more "masculine" mindset, and in that mindset you attracted men that are into that. Now, you've decided to change your mind, but you can't expect him to change as well. There is a chance that he is no longer compatible with your goals. However, you should by all means try.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 11:34 PM
6

Youtube is full of tutorial videos on how to clean and cooking shows, and it's free.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 03:29 PM
5

What do you get when you fall in love with a person? What does being in love and loving someone mean to you? I guess it depends on the value you place on love. I realize for some people it's not important. And I realize that some people prefer transactional relationships. But for others, like myself, love is important and transactional relationships make me recoil. Love also isn't just fuzzy warm feelings. It grows into something deeper, stable, grounded, it becomes your support, the shoulder yo…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 03:20 PM
14

Oh my gosh, I wish I could hug you right now! I think what's at the bottom of this is a deep underlying insecurity and fear of not being enough, and of having to prove that we're enough. And since our society and our culture is built on a 2000 year old patriarchal civilization, the way we're overtly or covertly told we need to prove our worth and ourselves is by doing and achieving. But that is masculine energy. And there is nothing wrong with it in the professional setting. I by no means am sug…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 02:49 AM
7

And realize that it does take two to tango, and that some men are just dead set on just having sex and they simply won't be compatible with you. And honestly, you really can't tell if a man is a HVM from just 2-3 dates. You actually have to get to know him and spend more time with him and observe him for a longer period of time. Because being a HVM isn't just about a job, money, status, or even public displays of piety.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 01:23 AM
17

Are they asking you directly to have sex? I saw that you're meeting these guys on dating apps. I am very much not a fan of dating apps. It is literally the lowest-effort form of trying to get female attention. How are you defining HVM? A good job/salary? A HVM is way more than career and money. Even if there are HVM on dating apps, the fact that they are on a dating apps indicates to me that at this point in their lives they are looking for something easy - even if they claim they are looking fo…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 01:18 AM
3

oh, girl. While there are exceptions, for the most part dating apps are like catalogues for sex for men who are looking to put little to no effort in for sex.
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 12:50 AM
76

Are you telling them straight up "I don't have sex before explicit commitment"? If so, I think you're being way too direct and kind of killing the pursuit, mystery, and thrill of the chase that comes with starting a new relationship. You kind of have to be coy about it. Dance around it, say everything but that. Bat your eyelashes, say you're scared of being hurt again, say you want to but your religious guilt is stopping you, say whatever, give them the old song and dance until you've reeled the…
/r/RedPillWomen09/06/22 12:46 AM
5

water is great for hydrating and it's free.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/22 07:26 AM
8

sugar is sugar. its the same sugar that's in sodas. sometimes it can have even more sugar and calories. i picked up on the fact that you said you're chubby but you don't like food as much as you like drinks, and that you like to order a lot of sugary drinks. I'll bet you anything if you cut out or largely cut down on the sugary drinks, you'd lose weight. see if you can get those same drinks with zero-calorie sweeteners.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/22 07:25 AM
5

I'm sure most places have some salad options that are pretty healthy but not the most expensive item on the menu.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/22 07:19 AM
1

Ina Garten
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/22 11:55 PM
13

This sounds like a nothingburger. You fiance didn't actually start a fight. It's normal for him (or anyone) to been feeling heightened emotions in this situation, especially if the guy at fault was being belligerent. Unless you have witnessed/experience specific evidence to the contrary, have enough trust that your fiance is healthy adult with normal self-control capabilities and isn't going to fly into a fit of irrational rage and violence at the drop of a hat.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/22 10:46 PM
8

right? plus the n count discussions here are plentiful... they seem to directly contradict this idea that women must allow men to "test them out" sexually before expecting commitment.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/22 07:23 AM
2

wow
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/22 07:22 AM
2

she's way more emotionally mature because she was raised by a narcissist, which forces you to become very self aware and hyper aware of other people and their feelings, emotions, behaviors, etc. ​ He sounds like a narc, so by definition he's not emotionally mature.
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/22 06:47 PM
2

this is the truth according to whom? To him? He's a biased party. if he actually wanted to help you improve your behavior, he wouldn't be screaming at you and calling you names. Instead, he would say something like "I know you don't mean this in a bad way, but when we agree that you should do something (like turn off the light) but then you don't do it, it makes me feel like you don't care or respect me enough to follow through on things that are important to me." or something like that. NOT tel…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/22 06:45 PM
3

well there's your answer
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/22 06:42 PM
5

He is abusive. Please leave. This is your first relationship, and your only prior close relationship was/is a highly dysfunctional relationship with your mother and your home life. So you have no healthy starting point or blue print for how a healthy relationship should be. ​ Nothing about what you described is ok. ​ Also another red flag for me is your large age gap. I am not saying age gaps are ALWAYS bad or a red flag, but in your case in seems like yet another clear imbalance of power that k…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/22 06:40 PM
1

Why are you so angry and offended? You have not been able to provide me and explanation of how my comment was offensive or snarky to housewives. How...... was my comment snarky towards housewives? Is merely mentioning housewives snarky or mean? I truly do not understand. If you feel insulted by me telling a 15 year old to not be like 30 year old insecure housewife, then the only conclusion I can come to is that somehow you 1) relate to a 30 year old insecure housewife and 2) you feel that's an i…
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/19 08:46 PM
1

Yeah, I also think there's a little bit of "we live in the 21st century, where stifling 50's social mores about what it means to be a lady are dead, lol! I'm being so bad, but whatevs... I'm not a perfect housewife and I embrace it - pour me another one, tee hee!" Yeah.... getting drunk at home on your husband's dime is super empowered and progressive!
/r/RedPillWomen29/04/19 08:35 PM
5

I think so. Traditionally in many cultures, the wife was in charge of the home finances, in addition to raising children and keeping house. Just because someone is a woman (or a feminine woman) doesn't mean they're automatically bad at math or scared of numbers.
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/19 03:06 AM
12

I personally find it a little concerning... just because you advertise it all over your social media it in millennial pink and rose gold doesn't make alcoholism cute.
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/19 03:03 AM
1

How did I insult the community?
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/19 03:18 PM
5

1 million% this!
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/19 05:19 AM
1

You DID NOT mess anything up because you wanted to hold off on sex. ​ You're only 15 and 16. You're still in school. This isn't the middle ages where people got married and had kids in their mid-teens (if they were lucky). ​ Both you and him are still growing physically AND mentally AND emotionally. People's brains continue to develop until about the age of 25, give or take. This means that your maturity and decision-making centers of your brain aren't at full capacity until then. ​ You said you…
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/19 05:18 AM
9

1 million % this!!!
/r/RedPillWomen25/04/19 05:12 AM
38

You could live on a farm, or cultivate something to sell. Make cheese, make wine, cultivate livestock or some other fruit/vegetable/etc. You'd have to find a man who wants to do that too. Or make things like furniture, etc.
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/19 06:02 PM
2

"When someone tells you who they are, believe them the first time." Exactly. I mean someone saying they think they're a sociopath might be either a joke, or them just being troubled and confused, or overly worried there is something wrong with them. But the actions we have had described match.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 09:42 PM
31

Is this a troll post?
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 08:45 AM
4

Sounds like he's looking to you to take the lead. It just depends what kind of guy you want. ​ Do you want someone who is always looking to you to see how he should act/react? He also sounds like he's kind of playing mind-games - whether he means to or not, maybe he's just insecure or young. But either way, I personally would pass on him. ​ And to answer your question, I think he was just a lost cause from the beginning. ​ We can only control our own behavior and our reaction to other people. We…
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 08:38 AM
2

You did nothing wrong and most certainly didn't lie to him.This isn't lying. Your mind has set up a complex web of coping mechanisms you are now slowly unwinding. Hamster alert. Disregard. ​ ​ She was sexually abused as a child. Please, a little human decency.
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 07:59 AM
2

It's not an "extreme" to point out that someone's behavior is a red flag. That's a big part of the job of this community is to point out the warning signs others are missing. EXACTLY!!!! ​ Vetting is a huge part of RPW. Just saying "well, he's the man so by default that means that he must be right and I must do better" is NOT RPW and is a fast track to an abusive relationship, and then if you're lucky, to being bitter and man-hating once you've managed to get out. ​ I think the real eye opening …
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/19 07:58 AM
11

I never said he was a psychopath or a narcissist, and even pointed out that we don't have enough information to make that judgement. However, the behavior in that particular instance, out of context, does point to those tendencies. How is that "a bit extreme."? How is it "a bit extreme" to point out that narcissistic/psychopathic behavior may point to narcissistic/psychopathic tendencies? Please reread what I wrote. Thank you.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/19 02:55 AM
28

Ok, I think it reflects very poorly on him to break up with you because you "lied" to him about your past sexual abuse. ​ That is something very private, very painful, and something you haven't processed yet (if you ever fully will). It's despicable what he did, and trying to throw the blame on you, as if you did something bad. ​ I know very little about it, but his behavior here definitely does point that he has psychopathic or at least narcissistic tendencies. ​ YOU were sexually abused, but h…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/19 02:14 AM
11

OP's post referred to her grandmother and her great-aunt, so I think it is safe to assume that when OP says "women in the past," she means women at least in the 20th, maybe 19th centuries, not ancient Rome, or, say, the prehistorical era or even before that.
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/19 09:25 PM
1

You're right! Thank you! I'm not sure how I came to the number 6, but I've edited my comment. ​ So it's EVEN worse! He spent/spends almost 65% of his waking time (assuming he sleeps 8 hours a day) playing video games!
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 09:48 PM
1

Posing the question: "Was that a much larger amount of time than usual" to me sounded that you were asking if 72hrs/wk was normal for him or if it was out of the ordinary. I interpreted this as implying that, given the situation, 72 hrs/wk might be ok (for example, if it's more than usual, it's ok that once for 2 weeks he was playing games 72 hours/week). I interpreted it with that implication because otherwise what point was there to ask such a question in the first place? The reason why I resp…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 09:46 PM
8

Don't marry him. He's a narcissist and sounds like he could turn abusive. ​ Also, watch the film "Big Eyes."
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 08:00 PM
5

I'm perturbed by all the comments here rushing to blame/question/bash you and say that the husband is probably gaming 10.3 hours a day because you don't give him enough love/respect or nag him too much. ​ Yes, your communication skills could use work, but he is just NOT captain material, point blank. gaming an average of 10.3 hours a day every day for the first two weeks of your daughter's life?!???! ​ Withholding money for food or clothes?? The anal sex? ​ He sounds abusive in addition to havin…
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 07:57 PM
4

It could be a genuine addiction Gaming an average of 6 hours a day every day for 2 weeks, and when it's the first two weeks of their newborn's life no less IS, what I and I think any reasonable person would call a "gaming addiction."
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 07:18 PM
13

144 hours in 2 weeks is 6 hours a day. THIS IS NOT NORMAL. Dude has a gaming addiction, regardless of whether she's nagging him or not. ​ EDIT: As u/__some_person__ has pointed out, 144 hours in 2 weeks is actually 10.3 hours a day, not 6. Not sure how I came up with 6. Anyway, so it's even worse.
/r/RedPillWomen08/04/19 07:16 PM
2

Also, I think for most men (even the ones who say they want feminist women), splitting the bill kind of signifies that you don't see him as a romantic interest/provider - even if this is really subconscious for them. I always offer to split the bill with guys whom I am not interested romantically in because I don't want to give them an excuse to think that we're on a date or that something romantic could happen. (Of course, many still don't get the message, but at least my conscience is clear). …
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 04:02 AM
1

Trust your intuition.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 03:47 AM
1

Start watching "Tidying Up with Marie Kondo." It's on Netflix. ​ What do YOU like? What re you favorite colors, what is your style aesthetic? Start looking on pinterest and instagram for design photos/accounts to give you some idea. s
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 01:21 AM
3

The biggest factors being showing admiration and respect for him, caring for and nurturing him, and being sexually available. That's exactly what she's been doing, and he treats her like an afterthought after an afterthought. ​ There is no saving this relationship, I think. Either for whatever reason, she's just not "the one" for him and no matter what she does or doesn't do, he won't ever commit to her; or she ruined the dynamic by being too available, too pleasing, too much of a doormat and by…
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 12:13 AM
16

For me him having you sit on another table is outrageous and a HUGE red flag. Yes. I read that and I was like "WTF??"
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 12:11 AM
10

In a nutshell, I think I do more, and am more into him that he is into me. ​ ​ I'm sorry to say, but this is what it boils down to. It may be because you bent over backwards to please him, and you put him on a pedestal, and as you say, sold yourself short. But at this point the why doesn't matter (except that it's a lesson for you to learn from). I think at this point, you're just wasting your time. It's convenient for him, but you're making a feast out of it for yourself. You're getting more an…
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/19 12:10 AM
5

But little boys can be associated with sexuality? It had nothing to do with sexuality. Color associations are based on culture, not inherent nature. In 19th century England, adult men wore red, and boys were considered "little men" so they wore pink. Up until the 1940's in the US, pink was considered a stronger, assertive color: An article in the trade publication Earnshaw's Infants' Department in June 1918 said: The generally accepted rule is pink for the boys, and blue for the girls. The reaso…
/r/RedPillWomen30/03/19 12:14 AM
13

First of all, fashion is made up by humans, and as such doesn't really have much to do with femininity and masculinity. ​ In the early part of the 20th century, pink was considered the color for boys because it was considered "too aggressive for girls," and light blue was considered the color for girls because it was "soft." Today, you can't go to any toy store without the girls aisle being covered top to bottom in pepto-bismol pink. ​ 17th century France, men wore heals, make up, wigs, and all …
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 09:31 PM
12

Why do you want to cook for him? Is this desire genuine? Or is this more of a ploy to try to get him to like you, or think of you as wifey material, etc? (Think long and hard about this, deep down). ​ ​ Be authentic. Do what feels right. People can tell when you're doing something with an ulterior or not 100% genuine motive. ​ Strangers on the internet telling you "by x date you should do y" is not helpful.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 09:20 PM
1

I don't find it unreasonable, to clarify, he's ... doing this ... to teach me a lesson that will get me on a trajectory that we both need to be on in order to have a balanced family. Not true. IF he wants you to let him lead regardless of right or wrong, that's not a Captain, that's a DICTATOR. ​ ​ And STUPID dictator at that, who will most likely lead you to ruin. That's the thing with the red pill and finding a CAPTAIN. Make sure you find a captain, not some schmuck whose ego outweighs his act…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 09:14 PM
1

I should have put my need to be right away, become aware of the reality and take the steps to change. See... this isn't about "a need to be right." If you're driving recklessly, YOU'RE WRONG. There's no two ways about it. There's no "Well, I need to be right, but I'll sacrifice that so we can marital harmony." ​ A "need to be right" would be "I took the long way to drive home because I thought the traffic would be less, but he insisted that I should have taken the regular way because the traffic…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 09:12 PM
3

You should challenge him when he does something WRONG, like putting bleach where motor oil should go in your car. ​ You shouldn't challenge him when he does something DIFFERENT, like putting the dishes in the opposite order of how you put them into the dishwasher.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 09:04 PM
2

I disagree. Submission is a big part of femininity. That's why women tend to want to "talk about it" (with their partners, their families, their friends, etc). A female-led group tends to try to be diplomatic towards its members and values group harmony over "being right" if "being right" with hurt others feelings and threaten group cohesiveness. ​ Submission allows women (generally speaking) to take critique better than men do. (This, incidentally, also can help women in the workplace). Submiss…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 08:53 PM
1

I don't know, I think those apply to femininity as well. You don't think femininity has honor or courage in it? Or mastery? ​ Femininity and masculinity are opposites. The opposite of honor is dishonor, the opposite of strength is weakness, the opposite of courage is cowardice, the opposite of mastery is ineptitude. ​ Do weakness, cowardice, dishonor, and ineptitude represent femininity? ​ This is just my opinion, but I think much of our society applies concepts to either masculinity or feminini…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 08:45 PM
1

I think this really depends, and you have to vet the therapist. Google therapists in your area. Read reviews. Ask people who know for recommendations, maybe ask in your church. Many therapists offer an initially free consultation. At the end of the day, you will have to vet them like you have to vet a potential partner. There some therapists that are messed up themselves and that paints their entire approach to clients - not good. But there are also some who are open-minded, and who realize that…
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 08:33 PM
0

I read your initial response. Why so angry? The OP sounds like she IS trying to work through her issues and improve herself, misguided as she may be. She came on here to ask for help in improving herself, and you unleashed an angry, hateful tirade on her telling her to work on improving herself.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 08:19 PM
2

Chevvron's point was, I assume, to break up with current boyfriend, and find a suitable romantic partner eventually, when the time is right and you've found the right person, rather than "trying to make it work with this guy." It doesn't mean start dating and sleeping with new guys tomorrow.
/r/RedPillWomen29/03/19 06:20 PM
–

I've recently discovered them and really like them. Just FYI, if you add salt during the cooking process, the lentils will be tough. However, red lentils, as opposed to brown lentils, don't have that little skin and so they disintegrate on their own whereas brown lentils don't as much. Still, I add the salt in last.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 01:38 AM
2

Yeah, I understand adults communicate and all that. But at the end of the day, if it's not working for someone it's not working. It's better to rip the bandaid off and move on. Anyway, he did you a favor. You need him like a fish needs a bicycle. He shouldn't bottle it up and deal with it alone in my eyes. I'm there to help if you know what I mean? Shoulda, coulda, woulda. You're not his mother. It's not your job to coddle him and coax out his feelings. There's a difference between two mature ad…
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/19 01:35 AM
1

Take off all mentions of sex in your profile. That's the reason everyone is zeroing in on the sex when they date you.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 09:17 AM
1

You may see it as a heart and soul but I see a woman who cannot detach herself from a toxic situation. It's her 13 year old sister. ​ ​
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 09:10 AM
1

I understand where you're coming from. ​ I do a lot of it in your case has to do with emotional/psychological issues like trust issues, control issues, etc. It'd be good for you to work on those, maybe therapy, look into some self-help books. Marianne Williamson is good. ​ But from the little I've read here about you, it sounds to me like you're a pretty darn sharp, intelligent woman. Of course, you will never ever truly submit to man who is less intelligent than you. No matter how much therapy …
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:55 AM
1

just eat more.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:50 AM
7

Just be yourself. If you're a woman; chances are you're naturally feminine, it's just that you've covered up the femininity with masculine behaviors society tells you to do. Don't try to be cool or strong. Get in touch with what you really feel. What do you like? What are you interested in or passionate about? Don't worry if it's feminine or not - your femininity will shine when you do something you're truly interested in and passionate about. Otherwise you'll be playing dress up. There are plen…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:49 AM
1

After nearly 4 years of dating he recently decided to end the relationship without consulting me. ​ ​ HUh? How exactly does one consult one's (soon to be ex) partner about an impending breakup? ​ "hey honey, so I was just wondering if it's ok with you if I break up with you?' ​ "No!" ​ "Oh, ok. Well, just thought I'd ask, no biggie. So, what's for dinner?" ​ Honestly, that threw up tons of red flags to me... you may have some control issues you need to deal with. ​ That said, he's a complete tra…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:39 AM
5

I don't know if and how it benefits her to tell the girlfriend her bf if cheating on her, but it certainly did benefit the girlfriend, wouldn't you say! ​ Not everything is all about oneself. Sometimes it's nice to do something for another person. ​ If I was that girlfriend, I'd want to know.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:22 AM
3

Well, he's not a stranger, you were sleeping with him. regardless of whether you and this guy were bf-gf, or just casually sleeping together, the fact is that you and him had a relationship together. I don't know why this person choose to completely discount YOUR relationship with this man and YOUR feelings regarding him lying to you and treating you like this. The fact that he lied to you about having a girlfriend could point to that he felt he did have some sort of official relationship with y…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:17 AM
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Southwest red lentil soup/stew or Indian-inspired red lentil tikka masala. ​ Caramelize onions with some olive oil. When the onions are translucent, add in chopped garlic and cook some more until onions and garlic are slightly browned. Add in chopped parsley and/or cilantro. Add in diced veggies like: celery, tomato, carrot. I also sometimes add in chopped green bean and/or diced eggplant. Cook for a bit, then add cumin powder, chili powder, garlic powder, and turmeric (optional, but it's very h…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 08:13 AM
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( you know the kind, where they are telling a story about how they got their first period and their nana took them to the farmers market where they bought amazing tomatoes and later turned into sauce). YES! Dude, I don't care that these lemon shortbread bites remind you of the summer days you spent at your mother's step-mom's sister's house running through the yellow daisies and then your grandma showed up and gave you some lemon drops (the candy not the drink) and tucked you with a yellow blank…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 07:03 AM
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roasted cauliflower ​ break up a head of cauliflower into florets, lightly coat with olive olive, salt and pepper. Roast at 450 degrees for about 20 -40 minutes, depending on how you like it. The longer you bake, the softer it will be. You can even broil it a bit at the very end if you prefer it more charred/browned. ​ Toss this with various toppings/sauces. ​ My favorite is chopping up tomatoes, cooking them in a pan with a bit of seasoning (no oil). When they've cooked down, add some olive oil…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/19 06:57 AM
1

Yeah.... so I think you'd be better off with someone more motivated, mature, and responsible. This dude has way too many issues and you're not his therapist.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:39 PM
4

walk putting one foot directly in front of the other. That will start to give you a natural hip sway. ​ Why are you embarrassed to say "thank you" "please" etc? ​ One thing that has helped me with negative thoughts is to actively counter-act them. When you hear yourself thinking a negative thought, talk back to yourself and tell yourself to stop.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:26 PM
1

- Be kinder, I'm a bit of an introvert (INFJ) and used to just hide away a bit. But now I always make an effort to be kind to people I meet. I smile at people on the street and am just generally more pleasant and sweet. It's scary sometimes, but rewarding! I'm an INFP, and I've realized I tend to hide away, and I need to be more social and get out of my comfort zone!
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:18 PM
7

Nails - natural, clear, or neutral/classic colors like pinks, bieges, creams, browns, reds ​ style/outfits - classic style and usually form fitting ​ hair - long with long layers. natural hair color ​ makeup - natural makeup, I just use it to highlight my features. Occasionally I'll do a winged eye. Sometimes I go for darker more dramatic makeup for a night out ​ diet - whole foods, very little processed or prepackaged, almost no junk food. I love cooking and most of my food is made from scratch…
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:16 PM
2

tights and sweater dresses ​ tight fitting sweaters ​ tight pants. ​ Just basically tight and form-fitting. ​ All of those are very feminine. Look up female superheroes or sexy female agents/spies/etc in movies.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 12:07 PM
1

Ah, makes sense then.
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 11:57 AM
4

Be prepared to take the test when it's scheduled, or drop the class. The purpose of a test is to assess your ability. If you tell the professor you need extra time to study, or you will fail, you are telling him you deserve to fail. If things are getting hot and heavy, and you have to put on the brakes and say "not yet, I need you to commit to me more", then he knows you're think you can't pass the test. You are telling him right up front your girl game isn't good enough, and that he won't want …
/r/RedPillWomen13/03/19 11:18 AM
1

I don't think you understand the meaning of the word "inherently." And please explain to me how saying "men like math more than women like math, therefore being good at math is a masculine trait!" is an analogy. I guess you also don't understand what the word "analogy" means, either!
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/19 08:19 PM
1

I did. I read them both. I cannot judge what you MEANT, only what you actually wrote.
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 07:56 PM
1

How did you come to the conclusion that just because more men than women tend to be interested in math that aptitude in math is inherently a masculine trait? ​ Are rainbows inherently homosexual/bisexual/transgender? ​ ​
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 07:53 PM
1

Oh ok, can you explain how it is "male brained"?
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 07:49 PM
1

Nope, didn't say that. ..... you actually did literally say that: ​ It's kind of difficult to force those things if you really do enjoy more simple/superficial things. I would actually go as far as to say that those kinds of simple interests are much more feminine. ​
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 07:49 PM
1

Especially since we're talking about math here, my definition of "good" in the context of being good or not at math is: either you understand mathematical concepts and are able to consistently and correctly manipulate them in order to arrive at desired or expected outcomes, or you don't. I don't see how that's a question of masculine or feminine traits. Either you can put two and two together, or you can't. ​ I'm not sure what the rest of your post had to do with my question. ​ ​
/r/RedPillWomen11/03/19 07:47 PM
7

100% this. Honestly surprised to see many comments that basically amount to: "omg girl a man supporting his woman is totally the woman being a princess bitch who doesn't respect her bf, going dutch/paying for all plus cleaning and cooking for him is the way to go! Don't be a greedy bitch, after all!"
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/19 07:00 AM
11

A women doesn't add to a (masculine) man's life by paying his bills. ​ I'm NOT advocating gold-digging behavior, but there is a middle ground. A relationship is two ways, and there are many ways to contribute and give value to your partner. ​ In a healthy relationship, both people contribute to the relationship emotionally, mentally, and sexually - i.e. the man and woman provide support, love, understanding, etc to each other in non-materialistic ways. ​ But there are also materialistic ways tha…
/r/RedPillWomen17/02/19 06:51 AM
2

Take a shower. Wear deodorant. Wash your hair, comb it, and put it in a nice pony tail or a bun, or blow dry it and wear it down. Wear clean clothing. Stand up straight. Make sure your nails are either neatly cut and clean, or have some clean, unchipped nail polish on them. Wash your face, don't pick at it, use moisturizer at night and sun block during the day. Sounds like you're pretty active, which is good, so keep that up. Go to Target or elf.com and buy yourself some inexpensive foundation, …
/r/RedPillWomen16/02/19 06:24 AM
1

So to you feminine=superficial and simple? ​
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 11:31 AM
3

for the record, just because someone is outgoing and extroverted doesn't mean they are "more able to keep up mentally." You basically just said that outgoing and extroverted people are more intelligent than quieter/introverted people. Which is completely false. A lot of the time, more thoughtful, introverted people are better to talk to about intellectual things because they actually think about what the other person is talking about and think about what they want to say, instead of shooting off…
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 11:30 AM
2

Having a well rounded liberal arts education, being able to think deeply and critically, being able to maintain and nourish our species physically and intellectually is just as valuable. These are feminine traits, and the ones that feminism has put to denigrating. Which is interesting, given that feminism and so many feminists have liberal arts degrees, yet lack the ability to think deeply and critical and certainly don't nurture femininity in any of its aspects.
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 11:28 AM
3

​ I mean... I don't think women are inherently unable to be good at math. i don't understand how being good at math is a "masculine" thing... can anyone explain?
/r/RedPillWomen15/02/19 11:25 AM
2

Is it possible for you two to organize a getaway or staycation - even for one night? Maybe your or his parents can take care of the kids? And just be with each other. Without the kids, without the dog, with an imperfect, disorganized house. Just try to bond with each other and see what's really important?
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/19 07:28 PM
2

Out of curiosity, why did you guys get a dog? Neither one of you seem particularly happy with its company. ​ I think any healthy, honest relationship needs two healthy, honest people. ​ I'm going to zero in on the dog. The dog doesn't seem to make either one of you particularly happy, yet the decision was made to get a dog. Why? What inspired you, or him, or both of you to get a dog? What was your motivation? Think deep and hard. Did you feel that a dog is what makes the picture perfect family -…
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/19 09:34 AM
12

I know that he feels really drawn to me, but he cannot make up his mind and his action now is based on a huge misunderstanding. If he cannot make up his mind, that means he isn't that drawn to you. Saying "make up his mind" implies that he is deciding between 2 choices: coming to you, or leaving you. If he was truly SO drawn to you, he would not be entertaining the choice of "leaving you." ​ I'm not saying this to be harsh, and I am truly sorry and empathize with what you are going through, but …
/r/RedPillWomen13/01/19 09:06 PM
1

However many you like/wear...
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/19 01:50 AM
16

Just say "Thank you for letting me know." and move on. ​ In a world fo ghosting, it's actually stand-up of him to let you know, rather than just ghosting you and dragging it out for you. ​ I know you really liked him and it's hard not to feel like this was an opportunity that was snatched from right under your nose. But things happen for a reason. Just take this experience as something positive - be happy you had that one great date with another person, that you clicked so well with another pers…
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/18 10:26 PM
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