~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| 3 | Would you like to have a husband who is still a virgin?Mine was. It wasn't a factor at all in my attraction - neither for nor against. I was not. Been together 18 years now. It was a bit awkward and slow to get started at first. But he's an amazing person, both in and out of the bedroom. 10/10 would marry again. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/05/25 07:24 AM |
| 6 | Women, in order to avoid abusive males, shun the completely opposite demographic.It's bizarre to me how much this is misunderstood. My first husband was quiet, socially awkward, soft-spoken, extremely nice. A soft, short teddy bear of a man. Very much not the "extroverted agressive Chad" guy everyone assumes women should "know" to be wary of. He also did a 180 after the wedding, cheated on me multiple times, put holes in the walls, revealed an explosively violent temper, and acted on an attraction to a 12 and 14-year-old neighbor girl. No one, not any of our family, friends … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/05/25 07:46 PM |
| 6 | Women are basically miny celebrities. Which is why the dating climate is badYep. My sister and I started getting hit on in the 2nd grade by pervy adult men. It's unfortunately common. Boys our age? Were just sweet, innocent, fumbling kids. The adults were predatory, disgusting, aggressive. Completely different and absolutely alarming. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/05/25 06:08 PM |
| 12 | How many of you have ever mocked a guy based on dick size or know a woman who has?You've never seen the roast beef meme? Really!? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/04/25 11:58 PM |
| – | I've tried helping a few younger guys get dates, something is wrong here.Do you think I would be better off insisting your hypothetical guy pair off with me instead, when I'm clearly not what he wants or would make him happy? How would that do anything but make both of us miserable? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/04/25 08:01 PM |
| 2 | Whats the true minimum?Gotta be frustrating for "just gimme the cheat codes damnit" crowd but...it is what it is. Closest thing? Learn to tease/flirt. But that'll just crack open the door. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/04/25 12:38 AM |
| 9 | Whats the true minimum?Men reading this will assume "X factor" is code for "money/hotness/status/height/dick size" etc. I can only speak for myself, but at least for me, it's really not. I've crushed hard on guys who were ugly, or broke, or socially awkward, or dorky, or short, young, or middle-aged, balding, fat. Sometimes several of these in the same guy. The attraction for me is usually rooted in a unique chemistry between our personalities that makes time with them zing, makes me hungry for more. Throw in the comf… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/04/25 11:53 PM |
| – | Being able to have sex at any time is still a privilege.You mean the experience of being penetrated by a horny man you're not attracted to is more unpleasant to you than it is to me? Why do you think that? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/03/25 06:08 PM |
| – | Why do women adamantly refuse to admit that the way they talk about penis size affects how men view themselves?Both can be true. I can not care about the size of men's dicks (I don't), and also recognize that 'small dick" jokes are body-shaming and gross (they are). | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/03/25 07:29 AM |
| 2 | You Can Never Trust a Woman Who Doesn't Have Intense Lust for You Nearly ImmediatelyI never have. To anyone. I have a high sex drive. Always have. It just doesn't work the way you assume it does. Also never cheated, even after 17 years of a very happy marriage with lots of great sex. But I guess I can't be trusted, according to an internet stranger. What a valuable insight! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/02/25 02:56 AM |
| 20 | why won't women engage with men?Not all women are the same, but I am (probably) the type of woman you're addressing. Attraction builds (or doesn't) slowly for me over time as I get to know someone. I don't actually feel it at all upon first seeing someone, regardless of how physically gorgeous they are. Like I have eyeballs, I can tell if a person is good-looking, but it means nothing to me. Like looking at a nice painting. So no, I don't know on first meeting/seeing a guy if I'm going to end up attracted to him or not. Even i… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/01/25 12:08 AM |
| 31 | Q4W: Do you want a submissive man, or do you want to submit to your man?They hate this one simple trick! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/01/25 10:12 PM |
| 1 | There are no consequences to being a "bad person" and no incentives to be a "good person" when dating for short-term.Where did I call myself good? Why did you spend four sentences making fun of something I never even said? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/12/24 04:22 PM |
| 0 | There are no consequences to being a "bad person" and no incentives to be a "good person" when dating for short-term.You think the point of anything I said was to claim I had the "correct morals and values"? Who were you quoting? Because I never said that, and certainly didn't think it or imply it. But enjoy knocking down your strawman, I guess. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/12/24 04:20 PM |
| 7 | There are no consequences to being a "bad person" and no incentives to be a "good person" when dating for short-term.Where did I put my morality on others? I didn't even share what my values are. I encourage you to identify your own values, and live consistent with those. No, I don't think you can just "choose" to not feel bad. If you value kindness, you will feel bad when you are unkind. If you don't, then you probably don't actually value kindness. That's what it means to have values. It means identifying what actually is and isn't important to you, on a deep fundamental level. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/12/24 12:37 AM |
| 7 | There are no consequences to being a "bad person" and no incentives to be a "good person" when dating for short-term.I don't love the tactic here of taking a term like "religion" which already has a definition, and then trying to expand that to include everything and anything that we humans find fulfillment in, or any framework of beliefs we ascribe to. But if you really want to do that, fine. It's your business. If what you mean is that people crave meaning, purpose and living consistent with their values, then yeah, that's essentially what I just said. I feel like this has strayed a bit from my original inte… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/12/24 11:57 PM |
| 18 | There are no consequences to being a "bad person" and no incentives to be a "good person" when dating for short-term.This reminds me of the way religious apologists will insist humans "need" religion because without the promise of heaven or threat of hell, people will just be selfish assholes chasing their selfish desires with no empathy or concern for others. It's a sad, immature worldview, and honestly, I just feel depressed thinking about it. I am not going to praise someone as a "good person" if they would have been a monster without the fear of hell. That's just an asshole with a sense of self-preservatio… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/12/24 08:19 PM |
| 13 | Q4W: If a man is unwilling to get into a physical fight for you, is he not a real man to you ?Not me. I'd be disgusted. I'm attracted to men who solve problems with their brains, not their fists. Men who solve problems with their fists are likely to find their SO "the problem" every now and then, as well as land themselves in unnecessary trouble all the damn time. No thank you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/12/24 07:46 AM |
| 3 | Is there anyone here who feel like they did everything right but their relationship failed regardless?Even the OP's idea of a standard relationship "playbook" is so sadly autistic and out of touch with reality. While there might be some sense in trying to follow a formula to appeal to as wide a pool as possible when trying to find a relationship, once you're in one you're dealing with a very specific person with individual, specific needs, preferences and desires. It doesn't matter that people in general prefer pepperoni pizza, if your SO is vegan and you keep showing up at their house with pepp… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/12/24 09:35 PM |
| 10 | It's beneficial for society when women experience negative consequences for choosing the wrong manYou know why. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/12/24 06:14 AM |
| 14 | Women with at least one son: Did having a son make you more sympathetic to men's issues and more disturbed by the prevalence of mainstream open misandry?I have two sons and a happy marriage. Most of my favorite people in my life have been men. I have always felt protective and empathetic toward the people I care about, especially men. Yes, I read about men's issues and have spent a lot of time working to understand them. I also identify as a feminist and humanist, because it shouldn't be one or the other. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/11/24 11:56 PM |
| – | The conversation has been hijacked by undesirable men, the REAL issue is that actual DESIRABLE men are being viewed as beneath average-below average womenDon't. We're happy and very lucky to have each other. Idk what weird scenario you've invented in your head to require "grief" but it's imaginary. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/11/24 05:12 AM |
| – | The conversation has been hijacked by undesirable men, the REAL issue is that actual DESIRABLE men are being viewed as beneath average-below average womenNo, see, the real problem is all the uppity women who think they're "too good" for Elon Musk. If a man somewhere with some positive attribute doesn't make a woman wet, she's broken! Society is doomed! Guys need to realize they're not competing with us. They're not even competing with each other. They're competing with how good we can make our lives without them. And I say this as a happily married woman genuinely in love with my husband. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/11/24 01:06 AM |
| 1 | Many women and men on this sub are willfully ignorant about male genital mutilationI am not crazy about the practice, but when I asked my husband how he felt, he honestly does not care. Doesn't mind that he was circumcised, and hasn't ever given much thought to the policy in general. He cares about a lot of issues...just not this one. I'm hardly going to tell him how he has to feel about it. I respect him and it's his body, not mine. No, I don't think we should be doing it. But you're right that a lot of people, even men, just don't care about the issue. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/11/24 06:54 PM |
| 3 | Question For Women: How often in your entire life would you say you saw a guy that you were attracted to whose number you would’ve liked to have, but he didn’t make a move/direct IOI and you also didn’t with him?I would love to see actual data on that too. I know women hate it when men pretend to want a friendship but really want to weasel into her heart and think of friendship as a strategy to do that. And we hate losing a friend after we don't return their feelings, though obviously that can just happen through no fault of anyone, and it sucks for everybody. I'm not sure I've ever heard any woman say "I hate falling for someone who used to just be a friend." My parents were friends first. My sisters a… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/11/24 10:05 PM |
| 3 | Question For Women: How often in your entire life would you say you saw a guy that you were attracted to whose number you would’ve liked to have, but he didn’t make a move/direct IOI and you also didn’t with him?Sure, but at least for me, it wouldn't matter if no men cold approached me, because I'm not open to starting anything that way. I'm not interested in strangers. I have pursued relationships with friends that I knew well and had time to become interested in. So it's not like I'm completely passive and make the guy "do all the work". | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/11/24 09:16 PM |
| 2 | Question For Women: How often in your entire life would you say you saw a guy that you were attracted to whose number you would’ve liked to have, but he didn’t make a move/direct IOI and you also didn’t with him?That's a weird take. I'm not approaching strangers, but I don't want strange men approaching me either. When I really know/like a guy, I'll pursue the relationship every bit as much, if not more, than he does. But I'm just not interested in strangers, period. Not approaching or being approached. All my relationships started from mutual friendships. I'm an equal participant in making/maintaining friendships, and romantic relationships. I'm not sitting around waiting for "dicks" to throw themselve… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/11/24 07:53 PM |
| 9 | Question For Women: How often in your entire life would you say you saw a guy that you were attracted to whose number you would’ve liked to have, but he didn’t make a move/direct IOI and you also didn’t with him?Just seems like a weird question, but maybe I'm the weird one? I've never wanted a man's phone number because he was physically attractive. Never. The thought wouldn't even cross my mind. I'm not blind, I can enjoy the sight of a pretty person. But that's where it starts and stops for me. If I don't know the guy really well and feel that personality chemistry between us based on who he is and how we get along, I am frankly not interested. It always seems strange to me when guys hit on strange wo… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/11/24 07:35 PM |
| 23 | Women can't have it all..Women know life is about making choices, and that sometimes those choices will involve trade-offs, sacrifice, delays, or things not going as we originally planned. We just want the choices to be our own to make, individually, according to our values and preferences. Not to be dictated to by others as if there's only one right choice and they have it figured out for us (and coincidentally, it always aligns with their best interests). Even the people who say they "want it all" don't mean what OP d… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/11/24 07:32 PM |
| 2 | AI gfs could change everythingI would be, because I snoop frequently over on the deadbedrooms sub to know that just getting off isn't the point. Connection, human intimacy, being wanted/desired is. If the fake version was enough, then don't we already have sex workers? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/11/24 12:47 AM |
| 1 | If Women Don’t Know Who They’re Attracted To Until They Get To Know Them (Demisexual), Why Don’t Women Give More People A Chance?I'm demi. For me, it's not "I don't know who I'm attracted to until I get to know them really well." It's "I'm NOT attracted until I get to know them really well." So no, I have zero interest in "giving someone a chance" when I am emphatically not interested in them in a romantic or sexual way (yet). It would feel really gross. Their interest in me would be off-putting, too. It would be like asking a man to date a fat woman that he's not attracted to, on the off-chance that she could lose weight… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/10/24 12:53 AM |
| 1 | Why don't women care about promiscuous slutty men?Oh the SDA church has them all over. And they tend to be highly-educated and well funded. Not quite as much as say, the Mormons, but not too far behind, either. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/10/24 09:04 PM |
| 1 | Why don't women care about promiscuous slutty men?We are in the PNW, and grew up in a very religious community (SDA) that included expensive private school and college, etc. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/10/24 08:46 PM |
| 8 | Why don't women care about promiscuous slutty men?This will vary a lot by region, economic and social class, religion, and age, etc. It was extremely rare for anyone in my social circle growing up, to have casual sex. Most of my childhood friends did not hookup, ever. Still none of my sisters or I have. My husband didn't. Since then, I've branched out and made a lot of friends through gaming online. It's more common with them, though obviously still not crazy common, bc gamers tend to be introverted. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/10/24 04:03 PM |
| 21 | Women shouldn't defend women who are obviously wrong just because they are women.Agreed. Looking is not the same thing as ogling. And no one should be filming others at the gym, or accusing others of "harassment" for just innocently glancing their way. Harassment happens, but not every interaction or glance is harassment, and they trivialize real harassment if it's framed this way. That said, you are the one who introduced the term "violating modesty" and that's the bullshit you're being asked about here. Kindly explain it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/10/24 05:13 PM |
| 8 | What advice would you give a man who claims he has "tried everything"I wish more people would read this because it's so true and also a HUGE element of attraction. The "Are you what I'm looking for?" approach gives the impression the two people are on an even playing field (or the dude might even be a little above). It exudes an air of calm confidence. Curiosity, a touch of interest, but with reservation, not desperation. On the other side, the "Am I good enough for you?" approach does exactly the opposite. It portrays the woman as on high, the prize to be won, a… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/09/24 05:59 PM |
| – | You Can’t Argue your Way to Success in DatingAs a woman, few things are as annoying as the assumption my hoohaa is supposed to be a "reward" doled out to incentivize men to behave decently. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/09/24 08:03 PM |
| 5 | There's a huge difference between what younger women want and what older women want which I believe causes a lot of confusion between what works best for dating"Friends first" is the only thing that has ever worked for me, in my entire life. At age 16. At age 30. Doesn't matter. I don't feel attraction otherwise. Maybe red pill tactics work on some women. I don't deny that. But it's a complete miss on others like me. Just makes me wildly uncomfortable. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/08/24 06:51 PM |
| – | Do you actually only find a tiny fraction of men attractive?I definitely would have agreed with you in the past, as it's certainly how I am and how I assumed every woman was. Basically demisexual. Having spent some years on PPD I can conceed that a lot of women really do care a great deal about looks, even if I don't. They talk about it all the time. So we're definitely not all demis. But even the most pro-looks women on PPD still seem more reserved/selective than men in general, willing to do without completely if their particular "type" isn't available… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/08/24 11:12 PM |
| – | Do you actually only find a tiny fraction of men attractive?As a fellow demi yes, this is what it's like. I do feel sexual attraction, but it is built up over time with familiarity, trust, closeness, compatibility. I'm extremely attracted to my husband, but it took a long time to establish that, and none of it had anything to do with his looks, which are fairly ordinary. I've had men tell me here that being sexually attracted to my husband isn't good enough because I'm not panting at the sight of him, based on just how he looks, which is apparently what … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/08/24 10:56 PM |
| – | Do you actually only find a tiny fraction of men attractive?Maybe one man in 20 seems physically attractive in an objective sense, like "oh that person has really nice features" or "that guy could model." None of that makes a man "attractive" to me if we're going by the definition of "attraction" that means I'm turned on, desire him, or even am interested in him. None, zero zip nada. Good looks are fun to look at, but that is all (for me). So is a fucking painting, and so what? I have no desire to sleep with attractive men, date them, or even talk to the… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/08/24 10:39 PM |
| 37 | Why is it wrong to say that if men are in the mood and women are neutral (but not agaisnt it) they should have sex with their SO?The percentage of men who don't understand women's arousal and why it is important for sex - and why sex can be very unpleasant and painful without arousal - is too damn high. It shouldn't be considered optional. Arousal lubricates, but that's just the start. It also changes the shape of the vagina to prepare it for penetration. Increases blood flow. Produces chemical changes that reduce stress, pain, and sense of disgust, and encourages bonding. Without arousal, an experience that should be int… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/08/24 09:49 PM |
| 2 | Most ppl want to be the AdorersMy husband and I read the OP and just laughed, because... what!? How are these "roles" not shared by both parties in any healthy, lasting, loving relationship? Doesn't everyone want to be both adoring and adored? And of course you can, what kind of nonsense suggests otherwise? Any alternative (either where you adore your partner, but they don't adore you back, or your partner adores you, and you don't adore them back) sounds dreadful. It doesn't matter that "you can't love exactly the same amoun… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/07/24 11:37 PM |
| 2 | The current rhetoric is that men and women have unrealistic expectations for potential partners. What unorthodox or off-label quirks or unconventional features do you find attractive?Likewise. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/07/24 06:20 PM |
| 5 | Question For Women, Which Of These Men Would You Rather Get Into A Relationship With?I'll take Jake, and enjoy him. I'd prefer someone in better health, no one wants to bury their partner young, but he sounds lovely otherwise. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/07/24 08:02 PM |
| 7 | Why exactly do you think dating is easy?I'm sure lots of people have different experiences, that's fine, but I grew up in a high income, conservative, religious, private school culture and almost no girls/women wanted or participated in casual (non committed relationship) sex. The idea that getting it should be "easy" for guys seems actually kind of nuts to me. I don't want it, I know a lot of women (obviously not all but a significant amount) don't want it, how could it possibly be plentiful and easy to come by for men? That math isn… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/07/24 12:39 AM |
| 9 | Men Admit: This Is Why herPast Drives you CrazyHonestly I don't have a problem with this take. I mostly feel the same about men. My husband was a virgin and I like it. I don't there's anything dirty or wrong with sex, casual or premarital or otherwise. But I'd be lying if I said I don't think it's at least a potential indicator he'd be more likely to cheat, the higher his body count. Not a hard and fast rule, but a possible concern. The bigger issue, of course, is past history of cheating. That's a deal-breaker for sure. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/24 12:28 AM |
| 0 | Men here only think they have low standards because they are blind to most things Women do as defaultI don't disagree. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/24 05:04 PM |
| -1 | Men here only think they have low standards because they are blind to most things Women do as defaultYeah every other guy on PPD: "I'm not asking for a model. I'd settle for an average woman, you know, pretty face, not overweight, no kids, low body count, agreeable and sweet. I'm not picky." Okay but you just described the top 10%-20% of woman, not the least bit average. The average woman is overweight, has children. Maybe pretty or sweet, but probably not both. This girl exists, of course she does, but she's in demand and rarely available because no one wants to lose her once they have her. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/24 05:02 PM |
| 4 | If you don’t agree with no fault divorce, how much are you willing to change?Many marriage ceremonies don't explicitly include "till death" anymore, especially if couples write their own. Ours didn't. Even if they do, I think it's fairly well understood in modern society that the couple are stating their intention to form a lasting partnership, not giving up their freedom in any kind of legal or permanent sense. I can't imagine coming out and admitting "I want to trap someone to be stuck with me until one of us dies regardless of how miserable I make them," out loud and … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/06/24 05:41 PM |
| 0 | What drives women to settle for guys they're not attracted to in the modern era?I kind of see that. It is so hard to really love/value a friend, and then lose that friend because they fall in love while you cannot. I think what women mainly object to, though, is the deliberate trickery - pretending to be interested in a friendship as a means to get close and push for more. When it just happens (and it happens to women too) it's just sad and unfortunate, nothing a reasonable person would get angry over. An analogy would be one person in a longterm committed relationship losi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/06/24 10:15 PM |
| 0 | What drives women to settle for guys they're not attracted to in the modern era?Nuance and variation in how attraction works? No freaking way! /s You're fine. My husband is the same way. I'm the same way. And according to most of the red pill guys on here who think human behavior is a simple and universal formula, we're all lying liars. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/06/24 06:05 PM |
| 11 | What drives women to settle for guys they're not attracted to in the modern era?Idk about the rest of you, but my attraction develops over time as I get to know a person. Initial (stranger, first glance) attraction means nothing to me, because I have no desire for casual sex or sex with someone I don't know pretty well already. It doesn't just rule "the bottom 80%" - it rules out everyone. I became attracted to my first husband because he was sweet, gentle, romantic, thoughtful. After marriage and a baby I started seeing the hidden side though, the cheater, emotionally vola… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/06/24 05:59 PM |
| – | Men don't hate women; men hate that women deny their privilege.Ok my personal experience then. I am in my 40's, have never had, nor wanted, casual sex. I have been repeatedly sexually harassed and even sexually abused, starting when I was a very young child. It's NOT a privilege when people keep repeatedly trying to shove onto you things you do not want, but they do want from you. Even in my marriage, I want sex at least as much (probably a little more) than my husband. I acknowledge man's sex drive in general is higher than women's in general. However, 1) … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/06/24 11:37 PM |
| 11 | How can a man with insecurities remain unruffled by women's predominant preferences in terms of tastes?Body shaming is repulsive and I wish we went after this one more aggressively. Using "tiny dick" insults doesn't just hurt the man that's the target of the bullying, it hurts every other man that reads/hears it, if they're concerned about their own size. It's not okay, and we need to be better. Though I agree that I've heard only a small (vocal) minority of women actually want big dicks. Men's obsession with this one betrays an (unfortunately typical) penis-centric notion of sex, that continues … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/24 10:05 PM |
| 4 | Are the gender ratios on dating apps actually skewed?"It's a numbers game." They know the odds of finding a horny hottie that drools on sight of his dic is excessively rare. They're just perfectly willing to crawl through broken glass (and thousands of rejections) to find her. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/24 08:35 PM |
| 25 | Ladies with high standards, no judgement, what are your standards and how do you justify them?The average woman is overweight, but most men would not agree that they had "high standards" for wanting a woman of healthy weight. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/06/24 05:32 AM |
| 3 | Women always say if men paid attention they wouldn't be shocked by the breakup, but is it even possible for the man to save the relationship?You know you're with the right person when their good traits are things you can't live without (kindness, respect, etc), and their bad traits are things you can easily live with. Because we all have them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/24 07:51 PM |
| 0 | Men. In the following either or scenarios, which man would you advise a woman to choose?Bizarre. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/05/24 01:33 PM |
| 1 | Men. In the following either or scenarios, which man would you advise a woman to choose?You don't think he's forming a profoundly deep connection with that sex worker? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/05/24 01:07 PM |
| 4 | Women's shame related to masturbationI have masturbated (to climax) since I was in diapers. I absolutely loved it, loved how it felt during, and how it relaxed me after. But it horrified my parents, who were convinced I was over-sexed (I wasnt) and that I'd turn into a huge slut (I didn't). They worked hard to shame me for it, and for a long time I was convinced there was something wrong with me (there wasn't). I wasn't thinking about sex or boys, and I didn't want any of that. As an adult now I know how ridiculous it was to make a… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/05/24 07:57 AM |
| 2 | How important is "feeling masculine" or "feeling feminine" to you?I've always felt like "femininity" was a box I resented, because society wanted to force me into it. Even today, while I have some "feminine" traits, I probably have just as many not considered feminine, and I like them too. No shade to hyper-masculine guys or ultra-feminine women. You do you. But I just want to be myself, without feeling forced to perform a role the other gender wants from me. I wouldn't be surprised if many men felt the same. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/04/24 05:37 PM |
| 10 | Why do you women vilify some men who are doing nothing to them?Yeah this isn't a "why do you women" question. Some people are shitty, judgmental and immature. Some people are paranoid and err on the side of caution a little too much, or carry around a chip on their shoulders from past bad experiences. None of these faults are intrinsic to women or exclusive to women. People of both genders do the above on this sub every single day, and you wouldn't need to look too far to find it, either. Sometimes some people make mistakes, or just suck in general. Why wou… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/04/24 08:56 PM |
| 7 | How do you feel about the fact that women aren't really expected to give the same level of care to men's consent as men are to women's consent?Completely agree and I don't see any gray area on this as a woman. We need more emphasis on this in our education systems. Women NEED to hear that they can abuse/assault/rape; these crimes are not gender locked, and to be shown examples of what this may look like, NOT just the typical agressive violent stereotypes. I am middle-aged now, but I was a married mother of two before it hit me like a truck that some of the "teasing" I'd done with my religious boyfriend before we got married wasn't just… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/04/24 07:03 PM |
| 21 | Why does society treat women with kid gloves, especially when it comes to relationships?Men complain about women not being "held accountable" for their relationship choices, because they actually view choosing "incorrectly" something women should be punished for. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/04/24 06:04 PM |
| – | "You're not competing with other men, but her peace of mind" actually you are competing with her situationshipsI've never had casual sex, and never plan to. It has no appeal to me. Even after my divorce, I waited to have sex again until I got married again. I think this is just indicative of the kind of women these guys are paying attention to, or are attracted to. No shade, they can like whoever they like, but there's a ton of non-flashy, non-showy women just living our lives privately, not on apps, not going out partying, not posting ourselves all over social media, etc. If you start out filtering for … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/04/24 10:42 PM |
| 1 | How does the average woman feel about sex?Oh Jesus. I'm sorry. You're a good dude and patient in your replies. I appreciate that. I get it, you have it tougher than most, and I'm sorry. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/04/24 06:22 AM |
| 0 | How does the average woman feel about sex?Maybe someday you will. He was an adult virgin when we got together, and he's just learned to be so good along the way. Anyone can learn! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/04/24 06:14 AM |
| 1 | How does the average woman feel about sex?Ah dang. I hope things get better. I'm sorry if my comment put you in a bad mood. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/04/24 06:09 AM |
| 12 | How does the average woman feel about sex?I've masterbated heavily all my life, even as a very young child. I have a very healthy drive. I have no way to know if I'm "average." How would I know that? But partnered sex is very different from masterbation. If I'm not with the right person, my desire is zero for partnered sex. And even with the right person, the experience can range from mind-blowing, to meh, to downright traumatizing. Being penetrated can be tricky, even risky. Getting sex to actually feel good can be difficult or elusive… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/04/24 05:48 AM |
| 9 | Do you consider a woman having tons of sex with you every single day a way to deter cheating?He really loved me. I really loved him. We had an infant we both adored. The birth had not hurt my sex drive or mood swings at all. He was an incredibly easy baby. It's been 15 years since the divorce and he's had very bad depression off and on since. No gf either. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/04/24 08:26 PM |
| 5 | Do you consider a woman having tons of sex with you every single day a way to deter cheating?I've lived my whole life trying to find external solutions to it. Turning it in was done on the advice of my (male) therapist. It worked better than I would have guessed. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/04/24 08:19 PM |
| 13 | Do you consider a woman having tons of sex with you every single day a way to deter cheating?Oh man, I hope not. But working on my own internal language, and showing myself care and compassion, has really helped my own self-esteem. Maybe that could help you too. It's all down to habits, and habits can be changed! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/04/24 05:43 PM |
| 67 | Do you consider a woman having tons of sex with you every single day a way to deter cheating?My first husband and I were very much in love, newlyweds, banging like rabbits. Our landlady (not even attractive) came on to him while I was at work, and he caved immediately. We hadn't even been married a year. For him, the external validation was irresistible. He had an incredibly low self-esteem. Getting tons of sex, affection and affirmation at home didn't matter; nothing could fill up that black hole of neediness and truly satiate the part of him that was broken. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/04/24 05:05 PM |
| 7 | Which is harder? Stay-at-home Parent? Or sole-provider for a family?I've done both. For me, being the SAHP was much, much worse. It isn't even close. I don't know what you're looking for when you say "feeling aside," or "difficult to perform." It feels a bit like you're fishing for a specific answer. I did not love being the sole provider. It was stressful. But I would do that again immediately over being the SAHP. I was absolutely miserable 24/7 doing that. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/04/24 07:21 AM |
| 8 | What exactly do women mourn after a heartbreak?Source: my feelings. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/03/24 06:54 PM |
| 11 | What exactly do women mourn after a heartbreak?You are basing too much of your worldview on a handful of stories. Let me turn this around the other way and see if you can understand the mistake. The most dangerous period in a woman's life is two years before and after a break up/divorce. That is when she is the most likely to be abused/stalked/assaulted/killed by her romantic partner/ex romantic partner. This is a factually true statement based on real data. But obviously that doesn't say anything about the inclination of all men or even mos… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/03/24 06:23 PM |
| 19 | Is it true that most people cannot lower their standards biologically?Everyone wants a happy life with a great person that contributes to their happiness and doesn't add a bunch of unhappiness. That doesn't usually change, and I would argue that it shouldn't change. But it is completely normal for the kind of partner you seek to fit into that happy picture to change over time. I had a guy friend, a hotshot highly paid software engineer, who married the gorgeous young receptionist at work. It was 50% lust and 50% ego. He took exactly one look and said "I'm going to… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/03/24 12:42 AM |
| 3 | Men are not blindsided by breakups/divorce as much as they thinkI agree with you on that. A lot of HL partners (both man and women) find themselves on the receiving end of dismissiveness, and that's just a harmful dynamic no matter what. I agree that no one should just give in to their partner's wants, actually regardless of what the issue is, but especially wrt sex, since doing so can lead to the reluctant partner actively disliking sex, disassociating, or even developing a full-on aversion. And that's quite bad for BOTH parties, so should be avoided at all… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/03/24 06:36 PM |
| 21 | Men are not blindsided by breakups/divorce as much as they thinkI don't believe it is a gendered issue. I see a ton of these posts by both men and women, though they tend to be discontented over different issues. The underlying cause is one or both spouses evaluate complaints with the same dismissive attitude. "I didn't think it was important, because it wasn't important to me." She's complaining about him not helping around the house? Not important to him, so therefore not important enough to take seriously. Why is she always nagging about such stupid stuff… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/03/24 10:18 PM |
| 5 | Female intra-sexual competition on display and the misunderstanding of what men find attractiveJust makes it more bizarre that OP made this entire argument laying out in great detail which he finds most attractive, when he has access to neither women, so the whole exercise is just fantasy fodder. His attraction or lack thereof is irrelevant both to these women, who don't want or even know him, and also to himself, once he breaks out of his delusion that he gets to pick one of them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/24 04:52 PM |
| 31 | Women have so many options that it's hard to sympathize with those who say they can't find a man.It's not even just physical attraction. Living with someone is freaking hard. Think about how difficult it is to pick a roommate! Only now it's for life...and they will be heavily involved in your kids' lives...and you have to mingle finances with them...and let inside your body/share body fluids etc. Even if you have zero physical standards whatsoever, it's still incredibly difficult to find someone you won't eventually hate or be miserable with. This goes for men too. The amount of trust requi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/03/24 09:50 PM |
| 3 | What happened to "if she is like that, she's not really worth being with"?I'm mostly here to try to understand, but nine times out of ten get too defensive to see what's under the anger, so it's not great for me either. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/02/24 11:26 PM |
| 3 | What happened to "if she is like that, she's not really worth being with"?I've wondered about this and so yeah, your explanation makes sense. Thank you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/02/24 11:21 PM |
| 8 | What happened to "if she is like that, she's not really worth being with"?Solidarity sister but...they're only listening to each other. Apparently we're all lying, even about our own dating history. Their ideology trumps everything, including evidence. Also you'll notice even the women who prefer tall men aren't just "not attracted to" short men. No, women must hate them. There's basically no neutral space between "actively getting wet for" and "wishing death upon" any man. It's either one or the other, ladies! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/02/24 08:07 PM |
| – | I think before anything, The system of men chasing and women choosing needs to changeI liked the point you made about attraction types forming in early childhood, as this at least partially explains why sexual preferences tend to lag behind the culture. It also gives hope, I think, that as we push gender norms into ever-widening boxes (or better yet free them entirely) we can make a difference for future generations and what they find attractive. I wonder if part of what has held men back in discarding traditional male roles is that due to a somewhat higher sex drive, they have … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/02/24 09:08 PM |
| 11 | Relationships are not 50/50For just once I'd love it if people who have no direct experience asked questions instead of spouting off like this. "Hey couples in reddit in egalitarian relationships, how does that work for you? Is it literally 50/50 in all areas, and does it work differently? How do you account for factors like different strengths, disagreements, attraction etc?" Instead, those of us actually in this situation and making it work, have to listen to the inexperienced and ignorant go off about a topic we actual… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/02/24 11:12 PM |
| – | People can't blame men for the " procedure" of dating when it wouldn't exist without their actionsI'm guessing he's seen some tiktok reels of Saudi princes flying hot young thots to Bali or something? I mean if so okay, but that is a) astonishingly rare and b) not princess treatment, I thought it was well-known those girls are expected to perform group sex and really demeaning stuff (like eat actual shit as a sex act) for the "privilege" of their luxury trip. I've never once in my real life heard another woman compare middle eastern men positively to western men. This isn't normal or common.… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/02/24 09:46 PM |
| 22 | If personality is so important, why wont women fall for their male friends more?Every time I've fallen, it was for a friend. No exceptions. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/02/24 06:13 PM |
| 9 | At a 50/50 male to female ratio, why are there so many men left out?Only if they are being forcibly raped. You would not see all 100% of women choosing to "be laid." | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/02/24 03:24 PM |
| – | Q4W: How much do you value factors like what your friends think or how he looks on paper to other people when it comes to choosing a man?I don't value my friends' or family's opinion of my love interest much at all, and I probably should more than I do. My silly, goofy, weird, dorky dad was my favorite person in the world when I was little. I thought he was literally perfect. Then my stepmom came on the scene and was embarrassed by all the stuff I adored, and gradually shamed it out of him. As a result I tend to be fiercely protective of "my man" and defend to the death all the things others don't like about him. That can blind m… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/24 07:42 PM |
| 16 | The Data Show that Most Women Can Orgasm from Penetration AloneSame. I just spent ten years having tons of PIV that never got me anywhere close, convinced I was "broken". | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/02/24 02:52 AM |
| 3 | How important is penis size in modern dating? Are men getting the wrong ideas about Penis size as a result of porn and vindictive women?That's totally fair. My sister and I are, and growing up all the stuff I heard about female sexuality sort of echoed our experience (the stuff you said was BS), so I assumed we were just normal women and almost all women were like us. Genuinely this sub has been eye-opening to me for that reason. I have no idea about percentages, but it startled me that some other women really do place so much value on looks. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/02/24 11:27 PM |
| 5 | How important is penis size in modern dating? Are men getting the wrong ideas about Penis size as a result of porn and vindictive women?I'm going to take issue with both the statements you say are sugarcoating BS. Maybe they would be if YOU said them, but they're not automatically when someone else says them. I've been called a liar more than once on this subreddit, but always by men. It's disappointing and frustrating. I'm demisexual and looks don't turn me on or off. They are irrelevant to my sexual attraction or lack thereof. And the best, most amazing, brain-exploding sex of my life had nothing to do with penis size. I reall… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/02/24 11:14 PM |
| 9 | How important is penis size in modern dating? Are men getting the wrong ideas about Penis size as a result of porn and vindictive women?That's surprising. I've never felt dick size has any impact at all in how fast or easily I finish, nor can I remember hearing that from anyone I know. Mostly we roll our eyes and say it's not about his dick at all but about the rest of his bed game. I see guys say this all the time, that women have a super secret preference but they won't tell in order to spare a guy's feelings, and also that dick size is the key to orgasm but until today, I've never seen a woman actually agree to it. I just tho… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/02/24 10:39 PM |
| 7 | How important is penis size in modern dating? Are men getting the wrong ideas about Penis size as a result of porn and vindictive women?Also a woman, and I can't relate to any of it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/02/24 10:18 PM |
| 9 | It seems for the average guy every woman is suddenly "demisexual"Yep. I'm just annoyed I got baited. I am demisexual. Which means Chad is basically an NPC to me. His looks don't mean shit...no more than they mean to straight men, asexuals, or lesbian women...because that's how sexuality works. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/02/24 07:37 PM |
| 11 | It seems for the average guy every woman is suddenly "demisexual"Clickbait title? Nothing about OP's post had anything to do with demisexuality. I kept waiting for it, but I don't think OP even knows what it is. "Making you wait unless you're Chad" isn't demisexiality. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/02/24 07:30 PM |
| 1 | Is maturbation looked down upon for men?Masturbation is fine. The nerve endings on your body belong to you and no one else - they exist to bring YOU pleasure, and how you use them is up to you. I only get uneasy with the extremes on either end of this discussion. People who "shame" their partners for mastubating, call it a sin when their kids do it, get controlling of others over it. Stop it. Those nerves are there to feel good, and attaching a bunch of extra emotional bullshit to it actually makes it more charged and problematic, not… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/02/24 11:16 PM |
| – | Why is Taylor Swift seen as a role model for young women when she has so many traits representing what’s wrong with the modern woman?Shameful! /s | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/02/24 08:57 PM |
| – | Why is Taylor Swift seen as a role model for young women when she has so many traits representing what’s wrong with the modern woman?But he does go. And no one is furious about it at all. We think it's adorable. Do you think her boyfriend is "obsessed with attention" when he goes to her concerts? Is he trying to get attention, or is he just getting it as a natural consequence of being a famous person while supporting his significant other in public? She's not making it about herself. She's living her life, doing things other perfectly normal people do (go to their partner's events?). But yes she also happens to already be abs… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/02/24 08:54 PM |
| 4 | Who is your favourite example of positive masculinity?Ted Lasso. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/01/24 12:25 AM |
| 42 | "You have to work 10 times harder than your grandfathers for women 10 times worse."My grandmother went straight from her abusive father's house at 16, to her "rescuer" (also turned abusive) husband's house. She had no money or education, and had 5 children in extreme poverty by the age of 25. Her husband abused the children as well, emotionally, physically, and yes even sexually. She had no money, no means of escape, and even the church the family attended shrugged off the abuse because my grandpa sometimes preached and served as a leader in the church. She tried to leave him,… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/01/24 06:39 PM |
| 8 | Why do men crave a stay at home wife so much?I only mentioned it because someone above used it as an excuse to avoid therapy. I don't think it's relevant at all to the quality of the therapy. But if someone else has concerns, it could be a data point for them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/01/24 06:59 PM |
| 9 | Why do men crave a stay at home wife so much?I'm a white woman with a male POC therapist, and it's been immensely helpful. I think the biggest thing working against therapy, for men especially, is that media's depiction of therapy is, frankly, utter horseshit. The media is dominated by ridiculous outdated tropes like laying on a couch rambling about feelings for hours on end, or moronic "personalities" like Dr. Phil. It's no wonder people don't want that. Real therapy is work, and damned difficult. But also, so incredibly transformative an… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/01/24 06:30 PM |
| 10 | Is cheating in women ultimately a matter of time and place?I'm trying to not be rude, I promise, but do you have any real-world experience with sex outside of porn or fantasies? Sex with any co-worker is problematic. You know the saying "Don't shit where you eat"? That exists for a reason. Sex with a co-worker is messy and full of potential landmines, doubly so if it's someone you work directly with or report to. And when it blows up - which it often does - who do you imagine is going to take the most collateral damage? The big boss man in charge, or hi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/01/24 07:04 AM |
| 15 | Is cheating in women ultimately a matter of time and place?At my very horniest, I just went to the bathroom to masturbate. Or my car. I never wanted to just fuck the closest co-worker. Look: you are giving WAY too much deterrent power to solo masturbation (oh no, dirty fingers! Stigma!) But not anywhere near ENOUGH deterrent power to coupled sex with a coworker. Masturbation: I do not even remotely need to touch my actual skin. Fingers pressing on underwear in the right spot works fine. And if I'm already that horny that I can't wait until I get home la… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/01/24 02:33 AM |
| 10 | Why is it so hard for taken women to ignore other men who show interest in her?Clearly not to her. People use emojis for different reasons. Not necessarily the ones you ascribe to them. You gotta learn nuance and context. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/01/24 09:34 PM |
| 3 | Do BP Women actually believe you can be truly egalitarian and 50-50 with children?Ying yang is true for most couples, even BP ones. Except I think the couple can choose which things make sense to split up, not socially-enforced gender roles. Yes, only a biological female can be pregnant and give birth. No one is denying that. But unless you earn money, or mow the lawn, or bathe kids, cook dinner etc with your reproductive organs, those jobs can be done by anyone. There are no rules. My husband loves to bake. I am better at spreadsheets. We get to decide ourselves where our Yi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/24 06:42 PM |
| 1 | Do BP Women actually believe you can be truly egalitarian and 50-50 with children?The first two years of our marriage my husband was unemployed, and for a good maybe eight years after that he was underemployed. Only recently has he started making about the same or a little more than I do. Your definition of why women "respect" or divorce is interesting, but seems maybe a bit wrong to me. I read the "unhappy moms" subs. They don't divorce because they don't need men. They divorce because the men have gotten intolerable (lazy, unpleasant, difficult to be around, demanding, addi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/24 06:35 PM |
| 5 | Do BP Women actually believe you can be truly egalitarian and 50-50 with children?I have what I define as an egalitarian relationship. It isn't as granular as you might expect. Our marriage is characterized by mutual respect, mutual care and consideration, and a lack of enforced gender roles or authoritarian decision making. At no point in time is either of us busting out a calculator to determine exact percentages of who is doing what. That would be ridiculous. And unnecessary. We operate fairly with each other because we want to, not because we have to. Our general expectat… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/24 06:17 PM |
| 16 | CMW: Most women have little to offer a high value man in a long-term relationshipYeah this "objective value" stuff is nonsense. I am sure I have little to offer that OP would be interested in. Just as OP has nothing to offer that I would be interested in. So he can call himself "high value" all he wants...it won't make someone like me value or want him. I'm sure he's "exploding" with the gold diggers though...I wish him the joy of them. I hope he gets what he's looking for. I did. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/01/24 04:52 PM |
| 2 | CMV: As a man if you're incapable of quickly getting a new girlfriend / hookup whenever you want, you cannot hope to have a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship with your current one or the one you're going to work hard to get.You don't need "quick options" in order to stand up for yourself and have good healthy boundaries. You just need a little self-esteem and grit. My husband was an adult virgin when we got together, and I still knew beyond a doubt that he'd willingly walk away from me if I treated him badly. He earned every ounce of my respect, and 15 years later, he still has it. Do you really think so little of men? That they'll all put up with abuse just to keep the possibility of sex on tap? I'd like to think … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/12/23 11:27 PM |
| 14 | We cant expect women to care about the inequality in the sexual marketplace. Its just wishful thinking.OP seems to think if they couldn't get casual sex, young women would forgo college and their careers in their 20's, and be happy pumping out babies and running the households of the men they are rejecting now. I don't see that happening at all. Women on average have lower sex drives than men, so sexual desperation alone isn't going to be sufficient to drive them into the marriage beds of men they aren't even attracted to. In the past there was also immense social and economic pressure to marry y… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/12/23 09:17 PM |
| 1 | Mens wants dont matterThese perspectives are just so weird. My husband and I are gamers, and we each have lots of male and female gamer friends. Friends are awesome, and neither gender has a monopoly on amazing, interesting people, so it would be downright strange to restrict your friendgroup to just one gender. As for "benefits," we play games together, joke around a ton, trade tips on new classes or mechanics, exchange gifts, commiserate if one of us is going through something hard, but mostly just have fun togethe… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/12/23 06:16 PM |
| 19 | Women are against the legalisation of prostitution because they want the "hoeflation" to continue, and are ok with men being miserable.I have never heard a woman say anything remotely like this. Where did you get this idea from? Like, I'm actually trying to imagine a woman saying "No, we can't legalize prostitution because then men will have more options," and I just can't. It doesn't make sense. It sounds like something dumb the redpill made up. I'm sorry but it does. Single women are not competing with sex workers. If a guy is alone and desperate and sees a hooker to take the edge off, he was already undesirable to women for … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/11/23 12:31 AM |
| 5 | For those who believe it’s impossible to find women who aren’t promiscuous - do you believe promiscuity is natural in women then?I appreciate the detailed response. When I said "unrewarding" I simply meant "It won't feel good." I won't enjoy the experience, and I'm quite sure I won't feel great afterward, either. There are plenty of times you can anticipate a "reward" before trying something new. I've never worked in a soup kitchen for the homeless, but I would expect that to be rewarding. I can also anticipate that cheating in a video game wouldn't be "rewarding" - in fact that's why I've never done it: because I'm so su… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/11/23 11:38 PM |
| 10 | For those who believe it’s impossible to find women who aren’t promiscuous - do you believe promiscuity is natural in women then?I know my body and sexual arousal enough to know nothing about that is going to feel good. This isn't a big mystery and makes me wonder if you know how women's arousal works, tbh. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/11/23 10:56 PM |
| 16 | For those who believe it’s impossible to find women who aren’t promiscuous - do you believe promiscuity is natural in women then?How do you know you don't want to sleep with a different gender? Or an animal? Or a really sexy dead person? You just know. You don't have to try it first. Just not wanting to is enough. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/11/23 10:52 PM |
| 17 | For those who believe it’s impossible to find women who aren’t promiscuous - do you believe promiscuity is natural in women then?I am neither conservative nor religious. Casual sex has 0 appeal to me. I've never had it and never will. It's risky and unrewarding. What's the incentive to do it? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/11/23 08:18 PM |
| 6 | The one factor that causes the breakdown of the relationship that we're apparently not allowed to discuss: children. (part 2)Easy. So abusers can wait until the wife is trapped with a kid or two, to let the monster out. My grandfather was kind to my grandmother when they were dating. She had a horrible childhood, and he was her savior that was going to rescue her. She thought. My ex-husband was a teddy bear. The sweetest, gentlest man ever. No one who didn't see them firsthand would believe the violent rages he could get into. I certainly didn't see one before we were married with a baby. And I definitely didn't know … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/11/23 04:33 AM |
| 11 | The one factor that causes the breakdown of the relationship that we're apparently not allowed to discuss: children. (part 2)My maternal grandmother was "able" to stay home with her 5 children while her husband worked. In actuality, he was emotionally, physically and sexually abusive to all of them - in different ways - and she couldn't leave because she had literally no means of support. My family on that side is still dysfunctional because of the disaster of this "sensible line" of family organization. The trauma that man inflicted unchecked - for decades - will never be fully healed. No, a system that gives all the… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/11/23 09:52 PM |
| 6 | A woman wanting her man to be emotionally vulnerable is selfish.Genuinely I think this is the biggest factor in the "disconnect" in PPD. Men and women both crying "Why are all the opposite gender shit!?" And then wanting to defend their own gender as basically decent. But there's a HUGE difference between our gender, generally (which is comprised of mostly decent stable people, doing our best to make good decisions and treat others well) and the portion of our gender that is constantly stuck in or circulating the drain of the dating pool, never picking and/o… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/11/23 04:34 PM |
| 1 | Wanting a low-maintenance partner doesn't mean you're controlling or insecure, its just you have limitsHe's picky. I'm picky. It's okay to be picky. To the OP: I do find it weird to be picky but try to characterize your standards in this judgy way using terms like "reasonable," "appropriate," etc. Those are your value judgments, not universal value judgments. It's okay to have them, but at least own it. Especially if it's stuff that's increasingly rare as you get older, like virginity, no health issues, or not having debt. Over time it's probably going to be harder and harder to find anyone who m… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/11/23 07:08 PM |
| 2 | Married people give crappy dating adviceAs a married woman, I've come to at least partially agree with you, but for different reasons. The "dating pool" I had, is not the same dating pool you have. Not so much because of OLD, or the rise of social media, though I won't deny those had some impact. The pool is drastically different, because we're not in it. Every year that goes by, smart, decent, emotionally stable people, people with a strong desire for a lifetime bond, good social and relationship skills and reasonable "standards", pa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/10/23 05:16 AM |
| 3 | CMV: There was never an expectation to have sex early or to have an "active sex life". Who came up with that?Social economic class might be a factor too. My parents started out broke but wanted us to do better, so even before they could afford it, they sent us to expensive private schools in the 90's. Almost all of my classmates were virgins. If there was a freak or two in your year, everyone knew it and they were looked down on as trashy. I lost my virginity my freshman year of college, with my boyfriend (who I later married), and I was the first of my friend group to do so. And it was generally consi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/10/23 04:53 PM |
| 18 | Ever notice how it's always AI girlfriends in the news? Why not AI boyfriends?AI girlfriend: "light housework" AI boyfriend: "plays video games" PPD: "Women demand so much more." | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/10/23 04:38 PM |
| 11 | Not receiving sexual attention causes lot of issues and society doesn't acknowledge itYou also have to spend money on AI bots, right? Money is exchanged either way. And machines can't care about you. You might fool yourself that the sex worker does - many men do, we see it on reddit all the time - but a machine? That's quite a leap for the "logical" gender. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/09/23 12:20 AM |
| 1 | CMV: Women would be best suited in a society where women who the ones approaching men for relationships.So do some women, but it's rare, and it should be apparent why. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/09/23 12:16 AM |
| 13 | Not receiving sexual attention causes lot of issues and society doesn't acknowledge itBut we already have actual real women who will do all of this. Sex workers "talk like real humans" and "behave like real women" and they are already here. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/09/23 11:40 PM |
| 15 | Not receiving sexual attention causes lot of issues and society doesn't acknowledge itHow are sex bots helpful if the problem is a lack of sexual validation from the opposite sex? Machines can't provide that. If the problem instead boils down to "I just want something to pretend with, while not actually having any human feeling or desire for me" sex workers are already a thing. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/09/23 11:24 PM |
| 2 | CMV: Women would be best suited in a society where women who the ones approaching men for relationships.If you had interested women approaching you and asking you out, flirting, trying to pick you up...would you ignore them and instead try to start something with a woman who doesn't appear interested in you? Because that's what you're suggesting women do. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/09/23 08:49 PM |
| 2 | Happily partnered folks, does your (heterosexual) relationship seem at all similar to RP beliefs or is very different?Mostly does not fit. When I met him on a hobby website, he was an adult virgin. No success with women at all, but very easy to talk to and get along with. We became friends immediately and stayed friends for years before things got romantic. He is not at all conventionally attractive - skinny, terrible wirey hair, glasses, bad teeth, etc. I am his first and only partner, we have a lovely egalitarian relationship full of mutual respect, caring and trust, and we've been happily married now for 15 … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/09/23 10:51 PM |
| 14 | Women are happier "single" because they're aren't really single at allIt's bizarre seeing men say women are only happier single because they "can" have casual sex any time they want. May be true for some, but I can't relate at all. I've never had casual sex because it's completely unappealing to me, so no, it isn't a "comfort" to me that I could, if I wanted to. It certainly wasn't in any way useful in making my single life happier. Like, if you hate seafood and never eat it, are you "lucky" to live in a seaside town where you could eat fresh fish anytime...if you… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/09/23 07:15 PM |
| 3 | "A lot of men are not desirable." Do you agree or disagree? Why or why not?Why would you assume I don't "show him" I'm attracted or "fuck his brains out?" Our sex life is incredible. What did I ever say to indicate otherwise? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/09/23 11:53 PM |
| 5 | "A lot of men are not desirable." Do you agree or disagree? Why or why not?Idk, this is like another language to me. I literally said I lust after him, in fact he's the only person in the world I feel that way for, and you respond with "not desired, not special." But I said exactly the opposite of that. How can you get more special, more desired, than "I am literally the only person on the planet that gets her going."? I don't just "love" him for who he is. I WANT him for who he is. I crave him. Why is it important that sexual attraction be visual? What's so special ab… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/09/23 11:24 PM |
| 4 | "A lot of men are not desirable." Do you agree or disagree? Why or why not?As a demisexual, I don't think it is better at all. I feel genuine lust, but it's based on the strength of our relationship, how much I like and respect him as a person, and our connection to each other, not looks. I don't feel ANY sexual attraction based on looks, and frankly I'm glad I don't, because I'm not lusting over every ridiculous attractive guy out there. Just my husband. And that attraction won't fade with time, either, if he goes bald or gets liver spots. I am madly in love. I'd take… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/09/23 10:50 PM |
| 1 | Q4W: in a scenario in which the man is providing financially 100% for the family and the woman doesn't work, what would you consider to be the justest way to split house chores and child rearing?Work is work. As much as is possible, the couple should try to balance their lives and tasks so that both have about the same amount of leisure, non-working time. It doesn't need to be more complicated than that. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/08/23 02:22 PM |
| 5 | Why are women often bothered by male attention, but men absolutely love female attention?I wasn't even developing that early. I am, however, an identical twin. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/08/23 10:05 PM |
| 7 | Why are women often bothered by male attention, but men absolutely love female attention?I was curious, so I asked my husband. He said cat-calling would feel flattering...at first. Mainly because it's a novel experience. If it happened frequently he would get annoyed by it quickly. He's an introvert, fwiw. The inappropriate touching, though, he said would be immediately traumatizing and he very much objected to it characterized as a "welcome" experience. I wouldn't be surprised if many guys agreed with that. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/08/23 08:35 PM |
| 33 | Why are women often bothered by male attention, but men absolutely love female attention?Another point I think is often overlooked is, this "attention" starts when we are very young. Much younger than most men are probably aware. I started getting unwanted "attention" when I was eight or nine years old. Church youth pastors who wanted to be creepy and too "chummy" all of a sudden. Anonymous calls by a man who would spew the most vile perverted stuff as soon as he had me on the phone. A stranger asking me to play the piano with him and then immediately trying to kiss and grope me. It… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/08/23 08:25 PM |
| 10 | Would you consider dating or even marrying an Average Joe or Plane Jane?This sub is such a head trip. My husband is objectively less attractive than those guys, but he's super attractive to me because he's literally my favorite human on the planet. He's honest, hard-working, witty, loyal, intelligent, thoughtful, patient, and despite having been a virgin before me, can play my body like a fiddle in bed. Looks schmoocks. I feel sad for everyone NOT married to him (sorry ya'll) and if anything ever happens to him I'll probably drive my car off a fucking bridge. Ok may… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/07/23 04:15 PM |
| 2 | In 2023, should men still be expected to pay for dates? Why?So yeah, there is a rule of etiquette that says if you ask someone to dinner, you pay. Same as if you're hosting dinner at your home, you bear the expense. You don't ask your guest to pay. That said, I'm an egalitarian girl and don't love this rule in dating, myself. I pay half, and if I like you and want to see you again, I do some of the "asking" too. I am extremely uneasy taking favors from or feeling in debt to someone I'm seeing. We'll both be happier if we know I'm spending time with you b… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/23 09:26 PM |
| 3 | WOMEN DONT ENJOY SEXWhat are the "resources" I can get from the masterbating I've been doing all my life? You think I was pre-planning for my "rich husband" or male attention, or a baby, when I was 5, 10, 15 years old and didn't want ANY of those things, but still masterbated daily? Nah man, I was horny and getting off. Like, you know, humans do. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/23 04:07 PM |
| – | Women, what do you think of men who have never had a girlfriend?Yes, he was. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/07/23 05:48 PM |
| – | Women, what do you think of men who have never had a girlfriend?He's 5'9, which is a little taller than ideal, but only because I'm 5'5 and have to tip up to kiss him. My first husband was my height and that was easier. It really doesn't matter much though. I'd be with my husband if he was 4' or 6', because he's literally my favorite person in the world. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/07/23 05:46 PM |
| – | Women, what do you think of men who have never had a girlfriend?I didn't fully trust my perspective, so I asked my husband if he pursued me. He said technically I pursued him. He was the first one to admit to having feelings, but he said I'd made it clear in other ways that I felt the same by the time he did, so he already knew. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/07/23 03:30 AM |
| – | Why are "happily married" people browsing these subs?Other perspectives are important. I've learned a lot. And sometimes I want to add my little 2c to the mix as well. It's not that complicated. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/07/23 07:24 PM |
| 3 | Women, what do you think of men who have never had a girlfriend?My husband was an adult virgin when we got together, and he's my favorite human, so it wasn't an issue for us. It helped that we were friends for a long time first. He wasn't a big unknown mystery I had to unpack ("Is there something hugely wrong with him?"), I knew who he was, and really liked who he was, before I went into it. Yes, he had a learning curve. But he's quite frankly better at learning than I am at teaching so he's more than made up for any lost time. 10/10 would recommend. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/07/23 05:45 PM |
| 21 | Before you can get a partner, you need good friends.Friends also provide a wonderful buffer to your self esteem. Spending time with people who like and accept you is super reassuring and keeps the howl of insecurity at bay. Trust me, you do NOT want your SO to be the only person shouldering that burden. It will make you needy, controlling, and desperate for her validation, which in turn will leave her smothered, resentful, and unable to respect you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/07/23 05:47 PM |
| 1 | What something you wish the other gender understood about yours and something you want to understand about there’s?I'm demi so I'm super malleable on stuff like physique, even grooming I can roll with a lot of flaws. I don't care what you look like; if we get tight enough for me to fall for you, I'll automatically be attracted. Yeah even if you have food stains on your comic con t-shirt, bad teeth, out of shape, whatever. It's not an issue. Income isn't really my issue; but ambition is. I don't want a super aggressive type A, but at least have a plan and make an effort. I don't want to be killing myself whil… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/07/23 01:00 AM |
| 5 | It's not possible for a man to have authority in the household if the woman is able to divorce him.Alright, that explanation makes a lot of sense. Game of Thrones-style families tend to end up with a lot of corpses (metaphorically). I hope that's not in your future. Maybe you'll find some friends who can show you a better model, or you can read some good books on the subject, or therapy. That really sucks that you were given such a rotten starting point. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/23 08:50 PM |
| 2 | It's not possible for a man to have authority in the household if the woman is able to divorce him.If you value efficient decision-making that much, I would encourage you to either seek a partner who respects your mind so much, she is genuinely happy to submit to your authority, or a partner whose mind you respect so much, you would genuinely be happy to submit to hers. You are certainly free to try that route. I personally think it would be far easier to get a little training or therapy aimed at clear communication, healthy conflict resolution, and advocating for yourself in the context of a… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/23 05:41 PM |
| 7 | It's not possible for a man to have authority in the household if the woman is able to divorce him.I see this argument all the time and I have to wonder about the unfortunately limited experiences of the people making them. Have you really never observed two people respecting each other's different viewpoints, listening to each other's input, calmly discussing the different options, and reaching a harmonious and mutually beneficial conclusion together? Your two eyeballs don't each see the same exact thing. Because of their different physical perspectives, they are able to add to the other eye… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/23 05:15 PM |
| 1 | Women who take time to develop attraction/are demisexual/etc do fine in the dating world. Men in that same boat are just screwed.My demi husband is really good at making and maintaining close friendships. Better than most people, probably. I think he developed feelings for those friends 2-3 times before we met. It didn't work out because they weren't interested and probably also not demi. With me though it was an incredibly smooth process - we clicked so well as friends we wanted to be spending every waking minute together, and over the months that connection got closer and closer until bam, romantic attachment. If you're… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/06/23 05:59 PM |
| 9 | Women who take time to develop attraction/are demisexual/etc do fine in the dating world. Men in that same boat are just screwed.I'm demi and this idea of casually dating men I'm not attached to yet is really unappealing. I've never done it and can't imagine wanting to. All my relationships have started as friendships, gradually becoming closer and more intense, and then finally blooming into a romantic attachment and a "dating" relationship. Trying to go on dates before that feels gross, I don't want the romantic attention, or worse yet, expectations, of some guy who is way ahead of me in terms of developing attraction. … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/06/23 04:46 PM |
| 8 | Those in happy LTR's, what has been the key for your success?A fuck ton of mutual respect. Great conflict resolution skills. Shared interests and outlook on life (politics/religion etc). I've been with my husband 15 incredibly happy years. It isn't "hard work" or even "work" at all, and while we have gone through rough events (job loss, family problems, health and financial struggles etc), they brought us closer together instead of straining the relationship. He's my favorite person in the world. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/23 05:28 PM |
| 2 | In this hypothetical, were women wronged?This hypothetical pops up all the time and it's never made any sense to me. Don't men realize they can already buy sex? The existence of escorts/prostitutes has been a thing pretty much forever, and it hasn't resulted in a mass exodus of men from the dating market. How is a doll better than a decent escort? It's still just a nut with a side of pretend intimacy/validation that you had to pay for. Clearly that's not enough for the vast majority of men. But as to your specific example, if I could g… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/06/23 03:27 AM |
| 1 | How many people on this sub actually want casual sex?I haven't ever wanted it, and don't see how it could be even remotely satisfying. I've had two sexual partners and both of them were in the context of a serious LTR + marriage. That said, I don't really advocate waiting until marriage or having only one partner for life. I do think there is often a bit of a "learning curve" with sex, where most people would benefit from maybe 2-5 partners so they can sample what's out there and see what they like or what works for them. If you "waited" and struc… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/06/23 04:14 PM |
| 1 | CMV: It's perfectly valid for men to want a low N woman BECAUSE he's insecure about his sexual performance compared to all of her other loversI married an adult virgin man. I was married previously so obviously had years and years of sexual experience with my first husband, while my second husband had none. A few things I would like to point out. My inexperience with my first husband (before him I was a virgin) didn't make bad sex "feel better" because I didn't have anything to compare it to. That argument just doesn't work. I knew it didn't feel good, I knew I didn't orgasm. Lack of prior experience won't convince your virgin bride t… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/06/23 05:56 PM |
| 21 | Shaming men for being virgins or not getting women is cruel, mentally damaging and by far way worst than slut shaming is for women, in fact it severly affects women more than slut shaming doesI think there's validity to OP's statements here (leaving aside the pointless competition to shut shaming). The ridicule doesn't have to be direct to be damaging. Say a virgin man tells everyone he's had sex, so he receives no direct bullying. But he goes online and reads lots of virgin shaming aimed at other men. "Tell me you've never seen a woman naked without telling me you've never seen a woman naked," "Good thing this guy will never get a chance to spread his DNA," etc. The message is clear… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/06/23 03:44 PM |
| 4 | Why do so many men here want casual sex?I've always had an extremely high sex drive. I was masterbating - at least daily, to orgasm - when I was still a toddler. In school I would often have to slip out of class and hide in the bathroom to do it, because I couldn't even wait until I got home. That said, I'm sitting here in my 40's with only two sex partners in my history - both of whom I was married to. Casual sex has never appealed to me in the slightest. So I'm wondering if it's not so much libido as risk aversion, as I'm pretty ris… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/05/23 08:49 PM |
| 2 | If your husband/boyfriend would have oral sex with all of his past exes but would never do it for you even if you enjoy it, would this cause problems in your relationship?Oh look, this question again. God, no. If he doesn't want to do something, doesn't enjoy something, what possible benefit could I get out of pressuring him to do it anyway? Even the thought is repulsive. I love this man entirely, and respect his likes and dislikes. I want him to engage sexually with me in ways we both like and enjoy, so sex can be a wonderful, positive experience for both of us. How is this a difficult concept at all? How could a sexual relationship stay healthy and thrive if on… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/05/23 03:03 PM |
| 6 | Marriage in AmericaI'm a happily married woman with children, so this might be surprising, but no, I don't think marriage is such a great idea for a lot of people. And maybe the world would be a better place if fewer people did it. I'm not against loving, long-term commitment between happy couples or anything. I just don't really see enough positives that a marriage license could add to that equation that is worth the potential downsides. The legal protection (for both parties) is nice I guess. Though if marriage … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/23 07:01 PM |
| 2 | Do dating age men have any interest in having a friendship with a woman who is solidly nailed down?Yeah, I don't really care about convincing them. It's okay. I've gone down similar rabbit holes before. It was just a waste of time. Several years ago I won a contest on a popular internet forum for a luxury all-expenses paid trip to Paris. Four-star hotel. $300 dinners and $200 bottles of wine. Limo transportation, the works. I got home and logged in to find the entire forum had convinced themselves the contest was a hoax and no one had really won the prize. I tried...posted every detail I coul… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/05/23 07:47 PM |
| 1 | Looks are NOT close to the most important thing for womenI agree with you. Honestly I have no idea what the actual breakdown in terms of % might be, but I agree that the "average" woman probably cares to some degree. Just reading the comments here have convinced me a lot of PPD women care, at least. I'm demi and couldn't care less, that's just not how sexual/romantic attraction works for me. But data on demisexuals is a new thing and so who knows how many people - men and women - work this way. I think historically a lot of women were more or less for… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/05/23 06:47 PM |
| 2 | Looks are NOT close to the most important thing for womenI didn't say that at all. My point was that a) as you said, different looks will appeal to different women, buffed vs lean, shaved vs hairy, etc. And b) some women literally don't care about physical appearance at all. I didn't say those women are searching for 300 lb men...because that's not what "don't care" means. They highly value specific other things, and if they find those things they'll fall for the guy, regardless of what the physical package is. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/05/23 05:47 PM |
| 1 | Looks are NOT close to the most important thing for womenSome women care a lot. Others don't care at all. My guess is on average it is important to most to start the initial interest, but shortly after it becomes a non-factor and other qualities will be necessary to keep the attraction going. But that's just "on average" because women vary a lot here, not just on how important looks are (from very to not at all), but also on what is considered attractive. Going on a strict gym and diet regimine to get yourself super pumped up will put you into one gir… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/05/23 04:49 PM |
| 7 | Do dating age men have any interest in having a friendship with a woman who is solidly nailed down?It's funny to me, because I know the two of them. It's fine if he wants to make up his own narrative. It's kind of what we do on the internet. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/05/23 04:31 AM |
| 9 | Do dating age men have any interest in having a friendship with a woman who is solidly nailed down?They really haven't, but go on. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/05/23 12:50 AM |
| 49 | Do dating age men have any interest in having a friendship with a woman who is solidly nailed down?My husband has been good friends with this chick he games with for 15 years. She goes way out of way to befriend me and never ever do anything even remotely flirty around my husband. She tells my husband how amazing I am, always invites me to everything they do, comes to me for advice about her personal life, and when my brother passed away she sent me flowers. I trust her entirely, and appreciate how hard she's worked to reassure me that she's really "just friends" with my spouse. It makes a bi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/05/23 11:18 PM |
| 3 | CMV: Most men would be content with women at least acknowledging how atrocious dating has become for males, rather than gaslighting them and insisting it was invariably something they were doing wrong or that it was their “personality.”I hear you. It sucks that you are judged for not obtaining something that is just naturally going to be in short supply. Not your fault necessarily at all, and not a reflection of your personhood or manhood. I am married to an adult virgin (I mean obviously he WAS, he's clearly not now), and I am grateful this "shame" seems to have dodged him. He admits to feeling "a little worried" in college, but nothing major or painful. And his self-esteem is completely intact, in spite of his lack of sexual… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/05/23 05:58 PM |
| 8 | CMV: Most men would be content with women at least acknowledging how atrocious dating has become for males, rather than gaslighting them and insisting it was invariably something they were doing wrong or that it was their “personality.”I absolutely DO sympathize with men who find it hard to find someone. Loneliness is awful and I don't wish that on anyone. I genuinely hope everyone here can find love and companionship, if they want that. After this it gets weird, though. As a person who never wanted casual sex and accepts many other women are like her, do I feel terrible for men seeking it and getting frustrated that no one will swipe them on whatever app they use as Amazon-for-Hookups? Not...really? I don't want these men to … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/05/23 05:17 PM |
| 0 | Women you have 5 points to create your ideal man. What are you picking,No worries. As long as everyone knows that, so this doesn't get turned around and weaponized later (see, all you ladies want is blah blah blah) or whatever. Not that this could happen...not here, on PPD! Ha. But genuinely a lot of these items are super unattractive to me. A giant, muscular rich guy who won't play video games with me, spends all day fiddling in the garage, and then brings his horse cock into bed, would be an absolute nightmare. Fortunately, as another poster pointed out, my husba… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/05/23 03:38 PM |
| 2 | Women you have 5 points to create your ideal man. What are you picking,I get it...but if you put up a bunch of cartoon options, you'll just get cartoon versions of our ideal man back, you know? Not really what we actually want. I wonder if you'd get completely different responses if you listed stuff like honest, hard-working, strong personal integrity, calm under pressure, good self control, smart problem solver, kind/thoughtful/considerate of others, good listener/good conversation, etc. All of the above missing makes "Elon levels of wealth" sound like a super vil… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/05/23 03:25 PM |
| 1 | Women you have 5 points to create your ideal man. What are you picking,I don't even like most of these, so this should be easy. If I HAD to choose from this list I'd take 3, 8, 9 and 11. But even those are just "nice to have" and in no way what I would consider essential. You're missing pretty much all the stuff I consider necessary. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/05/23 02:48 PM |
| 5 | Female women, how would you feel if you learned that your boyfriend/husband used to do things for his ex that he never does to you?She's an ex for a reason. Maybe him doing stuff he didn't want to, is a part of that reason. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/04/23 02:13 AM |
| 2 | Scenario. Imagine you’re with your EX boyfriend, and your CURRENT boyfriend comes into your life at work or a social event etc. Now what do you do?My first marriage was over before we separated, in my mind. And he knew it. After one particulrly awful violent outburst (his temper was one of the two catalysts for me checking out, the other was him cheating), he started to cry and grabbed my legs and begged me to not leave him. But it had been ten years of this crap. I was done. At that point, I was just waiting for my dad to clear his schedule so he could be present when I told my ex. I was afraid of him. That said, if my current husband had… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/03/23 08:33 PM |
| 1 | Women, what is your opinion on domenstic violence towards men?I don't know of any instances in my circle, personally. But I agree it's awful. Violence and sexual assault by women against men should be more well known and better prosecuted. We shouldn't excuse or tolerate it. I watched a documentary recently showing two egregious stories like this. And while the women abusers were obviously garbage people doing garbage things (and deserving of full punishment for it) they also seemed to genuinely not know what they were doing was every bit as abusive as if … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/03/23 08:04 PM |
| 13 | Women of Reddit, what is your actual body count vs. the body count you tell the men you're with when they ask?Oh look, this again. Two men. Both my first and second husband. There is no "versus". I don't see the point in lying about it. Why would I want to be with anyone who isn't okay with the truth of who I am? I'm not into casual sex. If that's what you're looking for, I'll be a disappointment to you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/03/23 07:48 PM |
| 5 | Have you ever shut down a man BECAUSE he talks normal with you, barring other external factors?Yeah I can only "give advice" on how I personally work. It would be insane for me to try to roadmap a guy on how to get women who are not like me. And most of the advice I see would be a complete miss with me. I know it's frustrating, but that's normal when people are different and respond to different things. Lonely men want the cheat codes for the hot girl they've been eyeing (I don't blame them) but it's not in anyone's ability - other women OR other men - PUA's included - to provide them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/03/23 07:32 PM |
| 4 | Have you ever shut down a man BECAUSE he talks normal with you, barring other external factors?I've never dated anyone I didn't already know, really well, as a friend first. My first husband and I were friends and co-workers in college. My current husband and I were online friends and co-admins of a hobby website. Personally, I would find it awkward and off-putting to go out with someone I didn't know. Until I get to know the person fairly well (read: probably a few months friendship at least), I feel zero attraction. Since I won't be interested any earlier than that, it feels very dishon… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/03/23 07:11 PM |
| 3 | Women, how often have you ended up sleeping with a guy whom you were not attracted to right away?Exactly the same. I really need to get to know someone first. Even though I can objectively "see" if a person is good-looking or not, there's no connection to my sexual desires just from someone looking good. I can enjoy a lovely sunset...doesn't mean I wanna fuck it, you know? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/08/22 12:11 AM |
| 2 | Q4W: Have you ever lied or concealed parts of your sexual past in order to have a man like you more, or make him feel special? If so, why? Did it work out?No, it doesn't make sense to lie. I want a partner who likes the person I actually am, and telling the truth is the only way to achieve that. Who wants to live in the hell where your partner likes a made-up person instead? That would seriously mess with your head. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/08/22 11:26 PM |
| 4 | Roe v. Wade Mega-ThreadSo if you, a man, smoke cigarettes, should you be prevented from getting medical help for the resulting cancer? If you eat salty food, you'd be okay with a law that prevents treating your high blood pressure? If you drive a car without a seatbelt and get in an accident, you'd support a law that prevents hospitals from treating your injuries? As a man who takes full responsibility for the consequences of his actions. Pregnancy can be the consequence of having sex (even protected sex). And in lite… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/22 09:13 PM |
| 4 | CMV: No fault divorce makes marriage pointlessExcept, wedding vows are just promises spouses make to each other at their wedding. They are not legally binding. The wedding itself and the wedding vows are just ceremony. To the law they as meaningless as what flavor of wedding cake you picked; they are not part of the marriage contract. It's not the officiant saying "I now pronounce you man and wife" that make a couple married legally in the eyes of the state - it's his signature on the properly-filed marriage license. And the state doesn't k… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/04/22 05:27 PM |
| 2 | Q4W: How many "Chads" did you sleep with before you met your current partner?0. Current partner is my second husband. First partner was my first husband. These are my only two sex partners, and neither of them comes anywhere close to a Chad. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/03/22 06:55 PM |
| 2 | How many of you actually love your partners?It means exactly the opposite. Men on here constantly claim that women only (or primarily) care about things like good looks or dick size, so it makes sense to frame our objection this way. Like, "no dude, my guy doesn't have good looks or a huge dick, and I love him more than my own life." YOU'RE framing that as hateful, because you can't grasp what she's actually saying, that those things you think are so terrible aren't, at least not to her and plenty of other happily partnered people. I don'… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/22 07:48 PM |
| 1 | How many of you actually love your partners?Married thirteen years. I love him more than anyone else on the planet. He's quiet, thoughtful, smart, patient, loyal, honest and hard-working. A wonderful conversationalist, with a disarming sense of humor. Great in bed. My early life was filled with a lot of disappointment, drama and trauma. Finding this guy, mature and consistent and trustworthy, who shows up to solve problems instead of create them, was like winning the lottery. We also make an excellent team with a foundation of considerati… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/02/22 07:28 PM |
| 1 | Women, how many female friends do you know that have had casual sex while on a trip?I mean I personally am not religious or conservative, but I'm basically here for the same reason. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/10/21 08:51 PM |
| 2 | Women, how many female friends do you know that have had casual sex while on a trip?This will probably vary a lot by region, culture, religion and social/economic status. I don't personally know any friend or relative who has done this. Because in my particular "bubble" this would just be completely weird behavior. Almost all of us have had only 1-3 sex partners in our lifetimes, and only in longterm romantic relationships. My "bubble" tends toward mid-to-high income, religious, well-educated, and mostly substance free. I do have a few friends from outside this bubble, and one … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/10/21 08:46 PM |
| 1 | Men Mistake Being A Passive Doormat As Being Nice Then Claim Women Don’t Want Nice Guys.My first husband was both - he put me way up on a pedestal, doormatted hard for me, AND had a violent, abusive temper. And yeah, the temper did not make an appearance until after we were married. My second husband is my ideal partner. Quiet, thoughtful, egalitarian, but also doesn't let anyone push him around or take advantage of him. Solves problems with his brain, not his fists. Expects to be treated with respect, but gives the exact same respect to me. At least for me, the perfect mix of "alp… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/10/21 05:22 PM |
| 3 | Looks are THE ONLY thing men care in a woman. Unattractive girls have no chance.I get it. One of my good friends in high school was like that. Not fat at all but looked fat because her face was piggish and chubby. Not her fault at all and yeah, she was perpetually single. Sweet girl. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/10/21 09:13 PM |
| 1 | Women of Reddit, why would you cheat?I would not. I'm in my mid-40's now. I've been in a bad marriage, and been in a great marriage. I have not, and will not, ever cheat. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/09/21 03:09 AM |
| 1 | Can someone please give me some good reasons why any financially successful man (or woman) should ever get married in today’s day and age?I got married because it was a deal-breaker for him. I had been divorced before and didn't believe in a lifetime commitment anymore, but I wasn't willing to lose him, so I said yes and went along with it. I'm still not a fan of marriage or lifetime commitments. I think it encourages people to misuse each other, take each other for granted, and also stay much too long in unhealthy situations. But I'm a huge fan of the person I'm married to. 10/10 would marry again. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/06/21 07:33 PM |
| 4 | How many women actually have more than 5 sexual partners?I know of maybe two women that have had more than three, including myself, my sisters, other female relatives, friends and coworkers. The vast majority of the women I know have had 1-3, and all in the context of serious, long-term relationships. That said, I come from a somewhat privileged, religious, upper middle-class background. So it probably varies a lot due to a lot of factors. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/06/21 11:30 PM |
| 19 | Most of the women on here have perfectly realistic standards and demanding they lower them is bad adviceIt goes like this, in order of what would make the person happy: A "standards-meeting" partner Being alone Anyone else So by definition you are either getting your top 1 or 2 choices. You may not be thrilled with 2, but you believe sincerely you'll still be happier with 2 than 3. The problem is when someone comes along and insists you change the order of 2 and 3 or else you're doing something wrong. But that's for the individual to decide. No, remaining alone is NOT what determines if your stand… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/06/21 03:06 AM |
| 1 | As a man, one of the most important moments in your dating life doesn't even involve you (a reflection on status)Yeah guys here seem to think Sex and the City is practically a documentary. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/05/21 08:46 PM |
| 6 | I’m confused- what makes women’s standards unreasonable?I think the problem is that the RP guys realize NF wouldn't have given them a chance, and they're taking her (completely reasonable) deal-breakers as a personal rejection. People are allowed to be as selective as they want, and nobody "owes you a chance." Like NF, I'm demi and none of my requirements have anything to do with looks. But that doesn't make me any less picky...I'm probably a great deal more picky than normal, honestly. I've had one bad marriage and one fantastic marriage, and believ… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/05/21 12:51 AM |
| 10 | Who are some female celebrities you find to be absolutely stunning?Straight woman here, but Milana Vayntrub (the AT&T girl) is something special. My God that lady is beautiful. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/05/21 07:04 PM |
| 1 | Let’s talk about arranged marriagesI don't think anyone here has argued that love matches are anything close to a "magic bullet." We know things (frequently) go pear-shaped. My argument is that the easier it is to divorce, the easier it is to see when marriage has gone wrong. But the availability of divorce didn't cause the problem of unhappy marriages, nor did choosing your partner based on love. Divorce just "reveals" what was there all along. The harder it is to divorce (be it from pressure from society, family, religion or cu… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/21 06:57 PM |
| 1 | Let’s talk about arranged marriagesI have no idea if it is better. It may be better, or worse, but divorce rate is no barometer. That is my point. For all we know, love matches result in more happy, blissful unions than arranged marriages. You cannot substitute the rate of divorce for the rate of unhappiness, as it appears you are trying to do. If you have an arranged marriage, you almost certainly belong to a society, family, religion or culture that makes it quite difficult to divorce, even if you are miserable together. So the… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/21 06:25 PM |
| 9 | Let’s talk about arranged marriagesYeah equating marriage without divorce as "success" is one of my biggest pet peeves with arguments like this. There is no work to isolate happy marriages and find out what makes them happy. It's just assumed that if they stay together, they are happy. But most of us know from a multitude of real-life experience that marriage is often a mutual suffering pact. I do not consider that a success. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/21 06:19 PM |
| 2 | Let’s talk about arranged marriagesI'm generally wary of arguments that assume higher divorce rates = bad, and lower divorce rates = good, without taking a closer look. For many demographics where divorce rates are lower, marriage satisfaction is also fairly low. Unhappy people resigning themselves to stay unhappily yoked because of family, religious, financial or societal pressure is not a win, in my opinion. For every divorce out there, you have at least one (if not two) partners who have weighed the pros and cons, and believe … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/05/21 06:15 PM |
| 5 | For men who complain about AWALT, and the CC, why don’t you just date a religious girl?Sure, and if OP's question was "Women of FDS, why don't you just marry CEO's of fortune 500 companies?" your response would make sense. But that's not what OP asked. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/05/21 12:10 AM |
| 2 | For men who complain about AWALT, and the CC, why don’t you just date a religious girl?Trust me, the guys here are NOT the ones the ultra-religious, submissive virgin women are looking for. They're holding out for a deeply religious, high-earning, "alpha" leader type. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/21 05:21 PM |
| 1 | Divorce is worse for children than never having married/two parent householdMy parents fought like crazy, and had an ugly divorce. It hurt and confused us, but for the most part, we were still fine. They still loved us and were devoted to us. The REAL, serious and lasting damage came later, from the (mostly decent, hard-working and well-meaning) people they remarried. It was incredibly harmful to live with people who didn't actually like us much, even though they tried to do their best anyway...kids can tell. We felt we were suddenly in the cold, not good enough, not wo… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/21 05:15 PM |
| 3 | Q4M: Can you post examples of photos of an average guy?I don't know what's holding you back, but it's not your face. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/05/21 04:48 PM |
| 4 | Just world phenomenon and its consequencesIt's astonishing to me how often this is ignored on this sub. I sometimes think the guys here believe all women are fucking like rabbits all the time, and the 80/20 "rule" is the reason they're not invited to the orgy. For every unlucky virgin guy out there, you probably have a woman like me (and most of my women family and friends), that never had casual sex at all because it's unappealing to us. We like sex just fine in the context of a close, loving relationship, but we never let ourselves ge… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/21 05:49 PM |
| 3 | Are dick pics as common as people think they are?Hint: those 1-2 are men pretending to be women. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/05/21 09:02 PM |
| 2 | Women of this sub, would you be okay with your bf not finding you pretty but being attracted to your personality and character?I'm demisexual, and I would be perfectly fine if I was valued the same way I value men. So yes. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/05/21 03:21 PM |
| 1 | Men have misconceptions about what "being attracted to personality" means for the dating sceneWe are both having exactly as much sex as want, with who we want. That is all I meant. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/04/21 05:19 AM |
| 2 | Men have misconceptions about what "being attracted to personality" means for the dating sceneI mean, I'm not selective because I "should" be. I'm just not interested outside a close, intimate relationship. I'm as liberated as the next lady, it just happens we want to do different things with our freedom. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/04/21 04:56 AM |
| 3 | Men have misconceptions about what "being attracted to personality" means for the dating sceneI'm like OP, and the answer is, I don't. I'm in my 40's, have fallen in love three times, all based on personality, and I've never had (or wanted to have) casual sex. I am just plain not sexually attracted to anyone, ever unless we're already very close. I don't date strangers either - I have to be friends, in fact pretty good friends, first. I can't help it; that's the path to my heart. I agree with OP. A person like me sounds great (I can happily fall for, date and marry ugly men) but I bet I'… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/04/21 04:24 PM |
| 2 | What is the average n-count of men/women?Idk, I'm including in my list friends and colleagues in their 20's and 30's as well. It sounds like OP is working with a sample size of a handful of teenagers he knows, and trying to extrapolate a lifetime average for men and women based on that. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/04/21 06:09 PM |
| 5 | What is the average n-count of men/women?Mine is 2, and I'm 44 years old. Ffs I know zero women in my life with even 10, even my most casual, attractive friends. Are we including literal sex workers to tip that "average" higher? I don't have a clue how else OP could get there. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/04/21 03:41 PM |
| 3 | men/women who won't date a promiscuous person why?Why was he "devestated"? A person with a very high n-count has a fundamentally different view on dating, sex, and relationships than I do. I wouldn't look down or shame the other person, but I would consider us incompatible, and move on. I don't really understand your friend's angst. If he considers n-count a big enough factor to ask about it, then wouldn't he have ended things with "Ms. Past-is-in-the-past" anyway? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/04/21 02:03 PM |
| 1 | Are men who are effected by the unfairness of sexual relationships socialists of the dating world ?It is perfectly fair, in the sense that you don't have to be fucked by someone you don't want, and neither do I. In the same way, we both can choose to have sex (or not) with anyone where there is mutual attraction. Yes different people have different "pools" of mutual attraction they can access. No one has the same size pool. An attractive 23-year-old blonde woman's pool is different than a 65-year-old granny, which is also different from the 19-year-old gamer, and the 30-year-old pro athlete. … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/04/21 10:59 PM |
| 17 | What's an advantage that the opposite sex takes for granted?I agree whole-heartedly that it's easier to find connection in social groups as a woman. People just approach you assuming a higher degree of openness ( or less stoicism ) if you're a woman. I will mull over your first point, but on the face of it I will say that it may not be as big an advantage as you think. You say "people will specifically like you for." But what you mean is "men will want to fuck you for." My body type doesn't make people like me. It just makes men want to fuck me. And if y… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 17/04/21 02:31 PM |
| 3 | What is commonly said by people of your sex on PPD that you feel doesn't represent your personal experience?Yeah for sure, the occasional role-play is fun, within the context of an established egalitarian relationship. But that goes both ways - please be the type of secure guy who enjoys a little bit of being dominated from time to time! All kinds of things can be sexy and fun, when we love and trust each other. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/04/21 04:26 PM |
| 1 | What is commonly said by people of your sex on PPD that you feel doesn't represent your personal experience?Yes to all of these! I'll add: Good looks don't "get you in the door", at least not with me. They work against you. Give me a guy with a compatible personality, integrity, intelligence and kindness, with under average looks, and I'll be well and truly hooked. I'm short (5,4"), so tall guys make for physical awkwardness. I just want a guy "around" my height. I don't care if you're shorter, either, as long as it's not physically awkward. I do not like beefcake, muscled guys. I do not want a protec… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/04/21 04:14 PM |
| 3 | How much is love worth?I wouldn't trade my husband for ANY amount of money. No way on earth. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/04/21 04:31 PM |
| 1 | Q4All: In your opinion, at what age is it still pathetic to be a virgin?Is it speaking out loud in particular that's hard? Or combining that with the pressure of a physical meeting in person? I'm in a number of gaming groups, and sometimes when we play online together, we use discord to talk to each other while we play. We're all just a bunch of gaming nerds, so there's no pecking order, or cruel cliques to deal with. Have you tried something like this, and if so did it make anything easier at all? There's no "in-person" component, but I wonder if you'd get used to … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/04/21 04:16 PM |
| 0 | Q4All: In your opinion, at what age is it still pathetic to be a virgin?I'm sorry, man. Have you found "socializing" online helps at all? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/04/21 03:59 PM |
| 0 | Q4All: In your opinion, at what age is it still pathetic to be a virgin?I don't want those guys either. Virginity might be fine. I married an adult virgin dude, and he's the best. 10/10 would marry again. The virginity itself isn't an issue, necessarily. But it might also be an indication of a bigger problem. If that's the case, I'm not going to try to fix you with my body. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/04/21 11:02 AM |
| 3 | Q4All: In your opinion, at what age is it still pathetic to be a virgin?I don't think virginity is pathetic at any age. I believe even viewing it that way is adding fuel to a dangerous societal fire. The reason for the virginity might make you completely unappealing to me ( for example if you are so awkward you literally can't string a sentence together, or if you boil over with a toxic level of hatred etc), but again I would still stop short of using the term "pathetic" to describe my aversion. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/04/21 02:57 AM |
| 1 | [Q4W] Do you dislike men with too few previous partners, similar to how some men dislike women with too many?I was 28 when I met my husband. He was a virgin. We were very good friends for awhile, then fell in love and got married. The "vetting" happened naturally as part of getting to know each other. We talked about everything, and got really close, before anything turned romantic. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/04/21 03:35 PM |
| 1 | [Q4W] Do you dislike men with too few previous partners, similar to how some men dislike women with too many?0 is fine. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/04/21 02:27 PM |
| 2 | Have You Ever Built Love Slowly?All of my relationships started like this. Friends first, gradually spending more and more time together, realizing how much we enjoyed each other, opening up with long talks that gradually became more intense and intimate, and forming a genuine attachment. By the time we officially "started dating" we were already really close because of this slow and natural build up. I honestly cannot imagine going on a date with someone I barely knew. It would be so weird and awkward. I would feel like I was… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/04/21 03:43 PM |
| 1 | What do you think of the Derrick Jaxn situation?You're ignoring a lot of details in order to cram this story into your narrative. She DID leave him, and stayed away, for a long time. To win her back, Jaxn had to put on a long, convincing display of the contrite, "changed" Christian man. Obviously, his display might just be for show, but my point is that she did not at any time demonstrate a willingness to "give him a pass," or "share her alpha" husband. Clearly, she expected his complete faithfulness in this marriage, and refused to reconcile… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/04/21 05:31 PM |
| 2 | Do you think that most relationships really start as friendships?I bet this varies a lot by personality/attraction type. All of my relationships began as friendships. I can't really conceive of it going any other way for me personally, because as a demisexual the concept of sexual or romantic attraction before getting to know someone really well just doesn't work the way it does for other people. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/03/21 06:52 PM |
| 4 | Let's say sex is indeed a need. What now? What do we do with this information?It's a bit ironic that this is a top-rated reply since the reason men here usually argue sex = need is that people really do need affection, touch and warm human intimacy. VR provides none of that, and prostitution almost none. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/03/21 12:46 AM |
| 1 | Q4M: I don't understand the complaints about women "riding CC". Do you want women to engage in casual sex or not?This comes up all the time, and basically this is at the bottom of it. They imagine 1) a gorgeous woman, who 2) is crazy-attracted to men of whatever average looks they have, and yet 3) has been able to control that raging sexual desire perfectly up until the moment she meets him. Seems a little bizarre to me. /shrug | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/03/21 05:11 PM |
| 0 | Women who give “ugly guys” a chance should stop acting like they’re being charitableYou're kinda if assuming I haven't befriended or dated ugly men. That's incorrect. Two of the three guys I've "fallen for" were objectively ugly. Plenty of my friends are. Doesn't matter to me. If I like them, then I like them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/03/21 10:07 PM |
| 1 | Women who give “ugly guys” a chance should stop acting like they’re being charitableIdk, that goes for pickups sure, but pickups aren't how most couples get together. I have personally never dated anyone I didn't get to know and be friendly with first. I can't say that any of my friends or family did, either. I have a hard time believing most people are going out with perfect strangers, even with the increase in OLD popularity. Maybe I'm speaking from my bubble, but I don't think I'm wrong. In general, you already know the person you're going out with. And you already have a se… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/03/21 09:53 PM |
| 6 | Women who give “ugly guys” a chance should stop acting like they’re being charitableIf she likes the guy, she's being rewarded by the pleasure of his company, and it's not charity. Who cares about how ugly either of them are? Do they like each other? That's what counts. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/03/21 09:29 PM |
| 5 | How much work does it take for the average man to get laid?I have lived a good, happy life, without casual sex. I care about actual struggles, and men definitely have their share. I just don't consider not having ready access to casual sex a hardship. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/03/21 10:26 PM |
| 1 | [Q4All] Do you think it’s important to go through a “Ho/Slut” phase?No, and I don't really "get it" either. I've never been interested in casual sex, and I don't understand its appeal. That's one of the reasons I keep coming back here -the intense focus on and desire for casual sex is fascinating, if difficult to relate to. I had one "serious" BF in high-school (though we never did more than lightly make out, we were "good kids"), one serious BF in college that I married and later divorced (after he cheated, became dangerously violent, and sexually assaulted a 1… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/03/21 10:12 PM |
| 1 | What really is the "spark"?This is something I wish I could figure out, because I've definitely felt it, and couldn't quite put my finger on just what "it" was. I felt "it" the first time I read a forum post written by my husband (we were both working as admins and editors on a website). I didn't even know who he was, didn't know anything about him, but I immediately wanted to. Everytime he showed up on the site, I was drawn to him. When he wrote to me specifically, it was like all the light of the sun directed on me alon… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/03/21 09:49 PM |
| 3 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?Sure, okay. You seem pretty attached to your convictions so I'm not going to spend a lot of time trying to pry you loose. Be well. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 02:50 PM |
| 3 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I have seven or eight years of reddit history and I talk a lot about us, but yeah I guess I saw this question coming and it's a very elaborate set up. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 02:27 PM |
| 5 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I wasn't. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 02:24 PM |
| 3 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I'm bad at this. He's told me, but I never remember. I'm short (5'4") and he's a little taller, but not so much that either of us have to crane to kiss. I want to say 5'9" but I'm probably wrong. Btw I really don't care beyond "is this physically awkward?" - my first husband was my height and I never had an issue either way. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 02:20 PM |
| 4 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?He hadn't gotten any woman before me. And I definitely wasn't obese. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 02:14 PM |
| 9 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?Dont take that personally. It was meant to be self-deprecating humor. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:49 PM |
| 8 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?Yeah the whole point of the 80/20 thing is arguing that women go for the top 20% regardless of their own looks. I didn't, so they gotta move the goalposts. If they want to restrict the question to the top % of women, they're defeating their own argument. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:40 PM |
| 2 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I'm really not. It's the internet. I could post pictures and people would still pick it apart, if they were heavily invested in defending their own narrative. So you do you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:38 PM |
| 5 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?People should be with someone who makes them happy. We make each other incredibly happy. Forgot to ask internet strangers for permission first. But carry on. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:29 PM |
| 2 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?Because he isn't. Believe what you want though; you're going to anyway. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:23 PM |
| 3 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I am decent looking, but the weight comes and goes. Sometimes it's "damn, girl!" and sometimes it's "okay okay, working on it" After a knee injury, I'm currently in the "working on it" stage again. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:20 PM |
| 6 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I don't even know what you're getting at, but no. And I married a virgin, so I feel like you're kinda barking up the wrong tree here. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:10 PM |
| 1 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?I mean he's a cartoon. But I googled him and it's not the worst comparison. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:07 PM |
| 6 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?Well I'm in my early 40's now, so most guys on PPD might not even consider me human, but I think I'm pretty, if average. Maybe better than average for my age. It's the internet though - I could say I'm a total bombshell and you'd have to take my word for it. (I'm not though.) I have some great features and some I dislike, like most everyone does. We met online. We were admins/editors on a website for amateur writers, and we got to be friends and gradually very close. I thought he was incredible … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:05 PM |
| 7 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?No? We are both professionals, work hard, and make a decent amount. We live simply and well below our means. And I've only slept with two men (my first and second husband), but IMO he's incredible on that score. The guy is everything to me. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 12:25 PM |
| 3 | What is a common opinion you hear from your own gender in PPD that you vehemently disagree with?Agreed. I married an adult virgin and he's fucking amazing. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:51 AM |
| 7 | Who should be in control of the relationshipI honestly feel like we're getting trolled by a 13-year-old. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:47 AM |
| 110 | Q4W: Is your current boyfriend in the top 20% of men looks wise?Definitely not. He's a typical STEM dork, ginger-ish, glasses (and not the cute kind), skinny, bad teeth, wirey hair that stands straight up. Was an adult virgin when we met. He's also thoughtful, hard-working, loyal, smart and kind. I've loved the hell out of him for the last 13 years and have no intention of stopping anytime, ever. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/03/21 01:23 AM |
| 4 | Q4W: What is the difference between romantic and sexual attraction for you?Plenty of people, both men and women, are demisexual. Looking at an attractive stranger is like looking at a beautiful sunset - I enjoy the visual experience and find it pleasant, but it doesn't send blood rushing to my nether regions. I experience tons of happiness, and good sex too. I just don't have any sexual desire for people I'm not already super close to. Do a little digging and you'll find this is not really unusual. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/03/21 08:09 PM |
| 0 | Q4W: What is the difference between romantic and sexual attraction for you?By your definition, I haven't ever experienced "sexual attraction." Which is strange since I've been married twice and had a lot of great sex with my husbands. For me, the intimacy/trust/caring comes first. The deeper that connection is, the more I'm likely to see someone in a sexual light, and desire them. Sexual attraction just doesn't flip my switch without that attachment. In the meantime, I have a perfectly healthy libido and will enjoy my "private time" but there is zero desire for any per… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/03/21 06:27 PM |
| 11 | Study: Most couples have ‘matching’ sexual experienceTrue for me, at least. I've slept with (and married) two men. The first had one other partner before me, the second was a virgin. And what you say about lifestyle rings true as well. I'm a working professional and a gamer. My friends are my gamer buddies, and to a lesser extent, my co-workers. I don't go to bars or parties, and everything about the casual sex lifestyle seems hollow and depressing and soulless to me. To high-n count men (or those trying to be) a woman like me probably doesn't eve… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/03/21 05:27 PM |
| 6 | A scientist explains what men don't understand about dead bedrooms. I think she's right.I mean, please keep in mind too that penetration isn't pleasant when not aroused. It's at least uncomfortable, and likely painful. Arousal doesn't just lube us up, it also changes the shape of our vaginas, to prep us for penetration. This is in addition to the psychological stuff mentioned already. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/03/21 06:44 PM |
| 1 | Why are most men never taught how to attract women?I was raised in a religious, upper middle-class home, and I was definitely not "taught" to attract men. I was mostly "taught" behaviors that would benefit my parents: to work hard, not talk back, be respectful and clean, polite and educated. Everything that would make a kid easier to tolerate having around, and reflect well on my parents in our community. If anything, I was "taught" NOT to attract men. Wanting attention from men or boys was considered low-class, and getting it considered downrig… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/02/21 07:20 PM |
| 2 | CMV: Women don't really like or love their boyfriends/husbands, they are just settling for the best they can get.Same. This is such a shallow, bleak idea of "love." It doesn't bear any resemblance to the real "love" in my life. I've been married to my husband for 12 years. Twelve years of inside jokes, of getting to know each others' deepest selves, of laughing and crying together, of long walks and long talks, of hungry or sweet or tender sex, of falling asleep while he reads to me, of waking up with his arms around me. Twelve years, the best years of my entire life, where I love him more every year, and … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/21 01:17 AM |
| 7 | Which gender likes the other one more in aggregate?Both the examples don't feel like genuine "liking" to me. A man trying to increase his odds for pussy, or a woman maximizing her friends who can help her move furniture - both are just acting in self interest. It has very little to do with (or even runs counter to) having warmth or respect or regard for the other person. We don't attempt to use people we like. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/21 09:35 PM |
| 18 | Which gender likes the other one more in aggregate?Men are thirsty. Why are we equating thirst to liking? Women learn by the time we're 14 that men don't have to like us one iota to want desperately to dick us down. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/21 09:18 PM |
| 2 | Q4W: Which body do you prefer?Yeah 4 is good for me. Mostly looks normal, healthy. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/12/20 02:45 AM |
| 0 | Is it fair to say most women wouldn't have swiped right on or hooked up with their husbands?I've never swiped right or hooked up with anyone. Casual sex doesn't appeal to me. Doesn't mean I'm not completely devoted to my husband though. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/12/20 01:09 AM |
| 1 | For those who have a tall preference, what does seeing a tall guy feel like to you?I don't care about height, but I wasn't bothering to post about that here because you specifically asked for responses from the women who do care. Ffs. Imagine me posting "guys who like big boobs, what's that like?" Then when the guys I asked to respond answer my question, I moan about how see, all guys love big boobs!! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/10/20 03:47 PM |
| 7 | For those who have a tall preference, what does seeing a tall guy feel like to you?So... The top rated comments on a question for women, are written by men? Okay. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/10/20 03:41 PM |
| 7 | Why are men mostly the perpetators of sexual harassment?I've said before, the fact that millions of people still consider this an ideally romantic moment in cinema history, is deeply fucked up. Looking at the plain facts, divorced from the emotional background music and audience's intense desire to ship them, here's what actually happens. She snaps at him in an obviously annoyed tone, calls him a derogatory name, backs away from him when he tries to move in close, literally says "stop" not once but twice while he takes her hand and blocks her exit pa… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/09/20 03:49 PM |
| 1 | So I've been reading this sub for a while and it gives the impression that men and women just hate each other. As a straight man/woman, do you resent the fact that you're straight?I have a kick ass marriage with my favorite person in the world. No way would I want to lose that. I don't have a problem with men, but with imposed gender roles. Not a big fan of mysogeny or sexism, either. This sub is just a train wreck I can't seem to look away from. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/09/20 08:32 PM |
| 5 | Unpopular Opinion: Whoever asks the other person out should pay for the date, regardless of genderHey maybe edit your post to say "the majority" instead of "every". I get where you are coming from. Norms can be slow to change. I think they are changing though. I don't blame people for challenging the norms and asking if they still make sense. This one made a lot more sense when men had most of the jobs and disposable income. I don't think it really makes sense now, so we agree on this. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/09/20 08:13 PM |
| 3 | Unpopular Opinion: Whoever asks the other person out should pay for the date, regardless of genderI am a women and do not hold it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/09/20 08:07 PM |
| 2 | Unpopular Opinion: Whoever asks the other person out should pay for the date, regardless of genderI rather like paying for myself, even if a guy asks me out (or alternatively, taking turns). It sets the tone from the start that I am not taking advantage of him, and that my acceptance was because I also looked forward to enjoying his company, not just wanted a free meal. It also makes me extremely uncomfortable to be "beholden" too much to my date - too many awful experiences in the past where guys tried to ply me with gifts/favors in an attempt to gain some kind of leverage in return. NO tha… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/09/20 08:05 PM |
| 1 | When all of your opinions about the opposite sex and dating comes from a sample size full of only teens and young adults in their 20s, you’re ALWAYS going to be disappointed, disgusted and angry. But isn’t that obvious?I met my husband in my early 30's, and we've been married now for twelve years. I absolutely adore him and we have a wonderful, loving and mutually supportive relationship. It's fantastic. Since my first marriage (to an immature cheater with anger management issues, zero self-control and an attraction to children) ended in divorce, I "should have been" all the things you describe - toxic, jaded, bitter etc. I was skeptical when I met my current husband, but that has never kept me from loving him… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/09/20 07:45 PM |
| 5 | An experiment in hypergamy/polygamy theoryThe question itself seems bizarre. I love my husband more than anything else. He's literally my favorite person and I feel lucky to be with him. I can't imagine doing anything so foolish and self-destructive as you're asking. I'd destroy my life. Beside the very real issue of devastating the person I love most. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 01/09/20 10:26 PM |
| 1 | "Gender wars" will always exist in society, because the male and female sexual imperatives are diametrically opposed.Sure, but most secure attached individuals are already in relationships, and what's more, those relationships tend to last. What then circles the drain of the dating pool are the avoidants and anxious, who are naturally inclined to make each other miserable. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/08/20 06:31 PM |
| 1 | Q4W: For attractive women, is dating in any way mysterious to you?That's my ideal guy too though. My husband is like this, and I adore him. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/08/20 03:23 AM |
| 1 | Q4All: How true is the idea that women give “bad” advice to their male Friends/family members?I can only give advice based on "what would work for me," but that's not terribly helpful overall. First, I have never wanted casual sex. I have less idea than you how to "get" casual sex. It doesn't appeal to me at all, and no one's ever overcome that hurdle to "make" it seem appealing and convince me to do it. I can't even imagine a scenario where I would want some random dude's dick in me. So I'm no help at all there. Second, although I have fallen hard for three guys in my life, what made ME… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/08/20 06:02 PM |
| 3 | How common is it for men to genuinely care about battling for custody?My dad wanted full custody and he got it, no problem. And this was over 30 years ago. My mom wasn't a criminal or on drugs or any of that. But she was emotionally unstable due to having been severely abused as a kid. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/20 10:26 PM |
| 1 | What is your body count? Questionnaire.2 (my first, and second, husbands) My first husband and I slept together before marriage; my second husband and I did not (his preference, not mine). F 43 No ONS, I'm not at all interested in casual sex. Three LTR's, the first of which was when I was in high school, and did not become sexual. Introvert, also prefer introvert men. I'm fine with my history. I was married to my first husband for 10 years, so obviously we had plenty of sex. It may not have been the best marriage, but I learned a lot… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/20 10:04 PM |
| 7 | Why are men bothered that they wouldn't be a woman's first choice?Men automatically eliminate everyone outside of their desired race/weight preference/age range, and then call the remaining women "average". That's not average, dude. Of course you're attracted to "pretty much all women" when you start out by eliminating all the women you aren't attracted to. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/07/20 09:24 PM |
| 4 | Is it the same group of men who simultaneously look down on women for having casual sex yet also expect sex within the first three dates?Right? Guys on here will say the "key" to unlock her "true" n count is whatever she says, x3. I'm like, "Well fuck me for being truthful then. What I really meant to say was my count is 2/3." /eyeroll | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/07/20 02:30 AM |
| 3 | If men magically turned into women for a day, they'd do the same thing as us and deny casual sexDo you imagine it's really easy for a lesbian to pick up women for casual sex? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/07/20 04:07 PM |
| 1 | If men magically turned into women for a day, they'd do the same thing as us and deny casual sexRetaining male brain and drive...and plumbing, though they don't realize it. Otherwise they'd be profoundly disappointed by their first sexual experience when they realize all that heavy PIV thrusting that felt heavenly when they were still a dude, doesn't actually feel that great with a woman's plumbing, and maybe even hurts. Seriously, you're going to run around doing that all day. Okay. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/07/20 04:03 PM |
| 1 | Paternity tests should be mandatory at birthYou're right though. I'm not against paternity tests, but it's a free country, go buy one. I can't imagine the government enforcing a rule that only serves to potentially hurt...the government. Governments like the assumed paternity from marriages because the more children that don't have identified fathers, the more welfare/benefits can't be recouped from presumed fathers. People forget that the reason states got involved in collecting child support in the first place wasn't to protect the inte… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/07/20 09:38 PM |
| 1 | Why Are So Many Dudes Here Worried About Raising Secret Cuck BabiesI think as a woman we just don't see it from a dude's perspective. To us, it feels like an absurd lack of trust in us. It can also seem like a weird over-importance placed on biology (adoptive parents still love and bond with their adopted children, why can't you?) But think about how emotionally devestated you would be if you loved and adored a child, that could one day be ripped away from you forever. To suddenly have no rights, no future, the connection severed permanently. You would want som… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/20 06:24 PM |
| 1 | Would you marry a man who uses a sex toy (e.g. flesh-light)?Yeah, it's hot! | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/20 06:16 PM |
| 1 | If you’re in a relationship, is it important for your partner to post about you?It's not at all important to me, but a) he's very private, and I respect that, and b) he's extremely trustworthy, so I don't have to worry about him. Also girls...guys who are willing to cheat can still do it, easily, even while publically professing his great love for you all over the fucking place. Social media tags are not protection. Don't fall for that shit. My first husband frequently told his affair partners how much he adored me, and how terrible he felt about cheating on me. Didn't magi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/20 06:11 PM |
| 1 | To what degree do you prefer your partner take the lead in your relationship?We are very eglatarian, and both prefer that. Neither of us wants to be led, or lead. It's great to have a teammate. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/20 06:04 PM |
| 1 | How many of you have a truly close platonic friend of the opposite sex?I have had casual friendships with guys, but since I'm "demi" I definitely can start getting feels if I get too close. That's just how attraction works for me. It's not guaranteed but it is a big risk. The last time I developed a very close friendship with a guy, well, now we've been married for eleven years. My husband, on the other hand, has had close friendships with girls pretty much always, and he's able to manage it just fine. One of my best girl friends now was first his friend for years,… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/20 05:37 PM |
| 1 | CMV: Boys need to be socialized to be neutral towards women collectivelyYou posted a "change my view" but don't want to engage with people who have different perspectives unless "forced?" | /r/PurplePillDebate | 02/07/20 02:20 PM |
| 1 | How many partners have you had?Sexual attraction can be a spectrum, though. Just because you are repelled by the thought of sex with men doesn't mean all straight men are the same, under all circumstances. I'm a straight woman, but if all men disappeared from the planet, I am sure I would eventually pair off with a woman. When there's no other options, things happen. People tend to fall into this pattern in prison, too. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/20 04:33 PM |
| 6 | How many partners have you had?2 men. My first husband of 10 years, and my second husband of 11 years. As long as he doesn't tragically die young or anything, this is it for me. He's all I want. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/06/20 04:27 PM |
| 1 | Have you/Would you date someone conventionally unattractive?I'm lucky that I don't need good looks to feel sexual attraction, so good looks are meaningless to me in the context of a fulfilling, romantic relationship. I'll vet for other factors that actually matter to me, thank you. In short, yes I have, and yes I would again. I don't mind. And I respect the fuck out of them and would not cheat. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/06/20 02:39 AM |
| 10 | Femininity is deadMy grandmother lived that nightmare. She got married really young to escape an abusive father. Then her husband became abusive. By her early 20's she had five children, all of which were beat by her husband, and at least one of which was sexually abused too. She tried to leave him, but had no options. Zero higher education. Zero money, zero ability to support herself or her five children. Zero help from her family, community, or church (in fact the church elders were the worst at trying to smoot… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/20 07:56 PM |
| 3 | I think social media and online dating is mentally ruining women"You may not get what you want, but you can give some guy what he wants!" ftfy | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/20 07:43 PM |
| 3 | Do you ever get approached sexually?And the ones that are, are most likely planning to rob you. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/06/20 07:26 PM |
| 2 | So it’s slowly becoming common knowledge that oral birth control can an effect on women’s libido and mate preferences. Has anyone else noticed this?Yeah I alarmed my sister so bad telling her about "insertion day" that she genuinely wonders why I stay with the IUD. Because yeah, it's awful. Not just from the pain from insertion, which is pretty severe, but the following dizziness, nausea, and overwhelming sadness I feel afterwards (usually have to curl up in bed and cry). It's just hormones I know, but it's truly a miserable afternoon. But then...nothing! No lingering hormonal effects, no weight gain, no loss of libido, no needing to rememb… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/06/20 03:46 PM |
| 2 | Question for Women: How does your ability to have casual sex with really attractive men affect your perception of your attractiveness and expectations for the men you can marry?Not even a little bit. I'm not interested in casual sex. Also not interested in "really attractive men." I have extremely high expectations for myself and my partner. I just don't care about his fucking looks. I care that we make a great team, have fun and good conversation together, share values and goals, and treat each other with integrity, honesty, loyalty and respect. I'm not at all willing to settle for less than that, but I'm holding myself to the same high standard. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/06/20 06:43 PM |
| 7 | Another Post About HeightIs a height requirement a mandatory field? If not I'd probably leave it blank. I think it would likely be weird and awkward to date someone way taller or shorter than me, but even then I don't care enough about it to list it as a "requirement" because that could eliminate too many really great guys. BTW honesty is fantastic and should be appreciated. But I get a little annoyed when women post different things (different height preferences, different N-counts, penis size preferences etc) and the … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/06/20 05:57 PM |
| 2 | Women don't need a man in their life these days. Their needs can be fulfilled without one.I may not "need" a man, but I love my husband so much I want him more than anything. If something ever happened to him, I'd probably drive my car off a bridge. Isn't that better, though? To be had because you are wanted, respected and adored? Isn't it better to know you're not just tolerated because I can't get a decent job without a penis? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/06/20 07:40 PM |
| 7 | It's not womens responsibility to have sex with any type of man or any percentage of men. There is no sex quota to filled.I like a functioning society as much as the next person. Maybe more. And I'm willing to do a lot to support it. However, "a certain level of solidarity and goodwill" does not mean allowing someone to thrust themselves into my body. How can you seriously suggest that it does? Would you let someone you're not attracted to do this to you, for the good of society? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 13/06/20 09:37 PM |
| 2 | How would you deal with a son or close male family member who struggled with the opposite sex?I don't have disgust for men struggling and failing with the opposite sex. I married an adult virgin man, and he's my favorite person in the world. If a guy asked me for help, I would try to help him learn confidence (I had to learn it too, and it made a big difference in my life), maybe a little personal style (you know, basically the Queer Eye treatment). But if he never asked, I would not assume it was my place to butt on in. I have two sons that I do my best to raise to be good, decent, and … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/06/20 05:58 PM |
| 2 | Does what women constitute "asshole behavior" muddy the water?You said it analyzed responses from 2000 unattached women. So attached women (married or committed women) were excluded. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/06/20 04:30 AM |
| 3 | Does what women constitute "asshole behavior" muddy the water?I don't claim to know the real percentage myself. But I think that if a study starts off excluding women in LTR's/marriage, you're also skewing the results in the other direction, right? I will say anecdotally that a lot probably depends on culture/background/wealth status, etc. In my family and among my private-school friend group, casual sex was almost completely unheard of. It wasn't seen as desirable at all. We all dated pretty chastely, maybe slept with our long-term boyfriends/fiances, and… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 11/06/20 04:24 AM |
| 1 | Q4W: Who do you think is more likely to cheat, the guy you invested in as a young woman or the guy who you picked up at the finish line?Yes, I was used to a guy who did everything I asked and always deferred to me. He thought he didn't deserve me and I was too good for him, and there was likely some pathology involved with how worthless he felt as a person. It was surprising (at first) to get to know my current husband, who was a really incredible person and friend to me, but also had firm personal boundaries in place and unwavering personal integrity. It made me respect him tremendously, a respect that has persisted through our… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/06/20 06:33 PM |
| 1 | Q4W: Who do you think is more likely to cheat, the guy you invested in as a young woman or the guy who you picked up at the finish line?We are not completely in disagreement here. It is very attractive that he stands his ground on some important things. You don't respect a doormat, and I'm not calling him one. So I am not just trying to pick a fight with you here. But I also think you're twisting my words a bit to support your dogma, and the result are two people who don't actually resemble my husband and I very much at all. I wish you would not do that. He is a far cry from an "alpha" man (in fact he was a nerdy adult virgin wh… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/20 04:56 AM |
| 1 | Q4W: Who do you think is more likely to cheat, the guy you invested in as a young woman or the guy who you picked up at the finish line?I think you're reading things into my post that I didn't write. My husband and I have been married for eleven years. Over that time, we have compromised and accommodated and changed a lot for each other. I'd hardly still be with him if he was completely intractable. What I was referring to here is a refusal to budge on moral issues, deeply-held principles, or personal boundaries. That's admirable and reveals a strong, reliable character. It's a far cry from "never change, never give in." | /r/PurplePillDebate | 09/06/20 04:09 AM |
| 1 | Q4W: Who do you think is more likely to cheat, the guy you invested in as a young woman or the guy who you picked up at the finish line?Yep. I've known three people in my life who, no matter what, would never cheat. These weren't necessarily the most moral people, or my favorite people to be around. But they all had identities firmly rooted in their principles. And along with that, a willingness to be completely and totally obstinate if anything tried to push them to go against those principles. I'm not a stubborn person. I'm a bit of a people pleaser, and I don't feel really strongly connected to my principles. A desire to be g… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/20 11:54 PM |
| 3 | Q4W: Who do you think is more likely to cheat, the guy you invested in as a young woman or the guy who you picked up at the finish line?Having been there, I would say you vet for stubbornness. Not to the exclusion of everything else (you still want kindness, respect, honesty etc), and of course you have to watch out for guys who are, well, dicks. But look for a guy who demonstrates with actions that he can hold his ground. You'll know it when you see it, this stubbornness. You push up against his boundary, and he doesn't budge. You turn on all your charm, all your persuasiveness, and he still calmly refuses to move. He is willin… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/20 04:17 PM |
| 3 | Q4W: Who do you think is more likely to cheat, the guy you invested in as a young woman or the guy who you picked up at the finish line?Seriously. I did all of #1 with my whole heart, and he cheated on me repeatedly. I got divorced and remarried in my 30s to a guy who will absolutely never cheat. Both situations have actually nothing to do with me (I am a loving and generous spouse regardless). It's all about his character, period. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/06/20 04:06 PM |
| 2 | What is your body count?43F, N=2. Just husband one (10y marriage) and husband two (11y so far, going strong with this one). I'm not interested in casual sex at all, so automatically men who expect that would be a no-go-zone for me. If something tragic happened and I found myself in the dating pool again, I'm sure I'd prefer low counts to high. My current husband was an adult virgin, and that has worked out amazingly. I don't really "get" the appeal of high count men. It just tells me we are probably running in very dif… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/06/20 01:35 PM |
| 1 | Do you think it's fair to say most Relationships failed because the two shared no goal?Right. Many times financial and business success requires an aggressive kill mentality and the skills to dominate ("I win, you lose"). That's exactly the opposite of what makes a relationship thrive - mutual respect, empathy, and skills to pursue shared goals ("We win, or lose together"). | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/05/20 03:08 PM |
| 8 | Men and woman develop a distorted view on their attractivness after highschool/college.Yeah I'm honestly very confused. OP is interpreting the "shameless" behavior of his coworkers to mean that they believe they are more attractive than they really are. But there's no evidence given to support the conclusion. They could just be experiencing normal adult professional life and reveling in it, enjoying the loss of the strictly enforced pecking order that children/young people frequently impose on each other in school. OP seems to believe the less attractive should be carrying around … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/05/20 03:15 PM |
| 9 | The level of student debt a girl has should be more prominently considered by men when choosing a girl to commit to.That's a cute turn of phrase. But (gasp) we are still teammates and in an extremely happy marriage. I've been a leader in a long relationship, and I did hate it. (BTW I also disliked "following") This relationship is different. We've been together 12 years, it's a true partnership with mutual devotion and respect, and I don't see that changing anytime soon. It's worked really well for us. I'm sorry you haven't seen it work, but that doesn't mean it can't. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/05/20 02:54 PM |
| 18 | The level of student debt a girl has should be more prominently considered by men when choosing a girl to commit to.Dude, you're talking out of your ass here. If you want a "leader / follower" dynamic in your relationship, go for it. But there's no rule that says this is the only way to make it work. My spouse and I are teammates and doing really well with that approach. A lot depends on the individuals in the relationship. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 25/05/20 02:45 PM |
| 9 | Self-reflection is an important practice that many people lack, resulting in a lot of entitlement.It still doesn't work. It's assuming everyone has the same standards, when they don't necessarily. OP is saying if you're not physically fit, don't expect a physically fit partner. But that's silly. Not everyone values fitness in their partners. What he should have said was, "if you're not fit, you can't attract someone who wants a fit partner." But of course he didn't say that, because it's painfully obvious. If you're not fit, you can absolutely still attract a fit person, if they're still att… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/05/20 04:42 PM |
| 3 | Q4all: could you forgive your cheating spouse?My first husband cheated on me before our first anniversary, when things were very good between us and we were in love. And then cheated again several times in our ten-year relationship. I really loved him, and never doubted that he loved me. He just had an incredibly weak character, no self-control, and couldn't resist a woman coming on to him. I forgave him, and I shouldn't have. This kind of character flaw eventually gets into all kinds of trouble. Money issues, temper issues, and much, much … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/05/20 03:00 PM |
| 16 | Pessimistic thought of the day: People say they prefer to have sex with someone they feel attached to, but what happens is that they feel attached to any sexy person in their surroundingsI am the same. I have had two sex partners in my life - my first and second husband. Casual sex sounds awful. I need trust, intimacy, and a very close bond first. I've said before that a sunset might be astonishingly beautiful, but I don't want to stick it in my vagina, either. I fell in love with my husband without ever even seeing him. He lived on the other side of the country. We were on the same hobby website, and I was just drawn like a magnet to everything he wrote. We became friends, and … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/05/20 06:11 PM |
| 1 | Do you believe in love? If you don’t then tell us why.I know it's real, because of my marriage. I don't think many people find it, not really. I consider myself very lucky to have it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 15/05/20 06:12 PM |
| 2 | Q4M: How would you feel if a man rejected/broke off a friendship with you because you weren't interested in a sexual relationship with him despite having actual chemistry?I think so too. That said, if a friend ever approached me romantically before I started to develop feelings for them, it would be as off-putting for me as for anyone else. The timing plays a significant role, unfortunately. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/20 05:59 PM |
| 2 | Q4M: How would you feel if a man rejected/broke off a friendship with you because you weren't interested in a sexual relationship with him despite having actual chemistry?I have done so, more than once, yes. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/20 05:55 PM |
| 2 | Q4M: How would you feel if a man rejected/broke off a friendship with you because you weren't interested in a sexual relationship with him despite having actual chemistry?There's a big difference (to me) between physically and sexually attractive. Lots of people are physically attractive. But I still have no desire to have sex with them. Like nothing, zip, nada. I don't find anyone sexually attractive until I get to know them pretty well, and fall for them as people. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/20 05:46 PM |
| 1 | Q4M: How would you feel if a man rejected/broke off a friendship with you because you weren't interested in a sexual relationship with him despite having actual chemistry?Yes, after. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/20 05:09 PM |
| 2 | Q4M: How would you feel if a man rejected/broke off a friendship with you because you weren't interested in a sexual relationship with him despite having actual chemistry?I have never dated anyone I wasn't friends with first. But I have also dated relatively few people. I have exponentially more friends that I was never interested in dating. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/05/20 03:49 PM |
| 1 | Which of not young (not particularly too old either) women would you still give 10/10?Really surprised not to see Milana Vayntrub mentioned here. Is 33 "not young"? Because I'm a straight married woman but I still turn into a puddle on the floor when she shows up on the screen. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 12/05/20 05:11 PM |
| 5 | The future is female indeedI love how you are using data from ten years ago. You should try harder. Maybe you can dig up a graph from the 1950's that will make things look even more skewed! Also, this is tracking one year's data across age groups. It's not two gender's data across a lifetime (which is how people are interpreting it). It should surprise no one that an older women ten years ago (who had even fewer education and employment opportunities when she was college-aged than young women do today) under-performed com… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/05/20 12:23 PM |
| 1 | The future is female indeedThe data is from ten years ago. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 08/05/20 12:21 PM |
| 1 | Q4W: How Many of You Want To Marry and What Does Marriage Mean To You?I am married. It was important to him, and he was important to me, so I agreed. I did not particularly want to get married myself, and wasn't sure I even believed in marriage as a positive thing in society. Almost every married person I know is some variation of unhappy and "stuck." But I was head over heels for the guy, and marriage was essential to him. What I've learned is, sometimes you just get lucky. I still can't say I see the evidence that marriage is a great for everyone else, but it tu… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/04/20 01:27 PM |
| 13 | To promiscuous/high-N women: what unique insights to men men do you have that non-promiscuous women and other men lack?She didn't say "women are turned off" by virgins. If anything, she's implying the reverse - that if women are inclined to sleep with virgins, they'll probably be disappointed. That they won't know how to fuck, and as a woman you're unlikely to have a good time. Seems like a completely reasonable position if she's just horny and wanting a one-time hookup. If you're hungry right now, you don't go to a restaurant where they'll take your money but can't figure out how to cook you a meal yet. It woul… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 29/04/20 11:41 AM |
| 6 | What do women have against men who speak elegantly?The main goal of communication is to facilitate understanding. Not to please yourself, not to impress others, not to challenge your brain like your daily sudoku puzzle. Understanding, first and foremost. If your preferred style of communication makes understanding more difficult or less efficient, you are, put simply, bad at it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/04/20 04:01 PM |
| 2 | Can I ask what your N-Count is and if it affected a relationshipF43. N =2, both of whom I married. No, I don't think it's ever been a problem. I gravitate to long commitments, and don't understand the appeal of sex outside of them. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/04/20 02:01 AM |
| 1 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?I've been horny plenty of times. It's never made me want stranger dick. That's what I'm trying to tell you. Just like I've been hungry plenty of times, but none of those times left me salivating over, say, laundry detergent. And for good reason - laundry detergent wouldn't solve my hunger problem. And stranger dick wouldn't solve my horny problem. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/04/20 02:49 AM |
| 1 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?I swear I'm not trying to be argumentative, but that makes no sense. The situation presented (random dick glory hole) is the opposite of arousing - it's repulsive and a turn off. Why would I want some stranger's dick inside me? Furthermore, PIV sex alone isn't sexually satisfying, for me (and the majority of women, who do not orgasm from it). Why would I first go to the trouble of getting myself worked up and aroused, just so I can power through this unappealing and unfulfilling act? I have a hu… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/04/20 02:23 AM |
| 2 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?Are you really claiming that a penis would need to be spiked for penetration to be painful or unpleasant? You can't actually believe that, can you? Arousal is necessary to make penetration not painful; it causes lubrication, the swelling of the clitoris, even expanding and lengthening the vagina to prepare it for penetration. If I'm not sufficiently aroused, sex is going to hurt. That's entirely normal. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/04/20 07:00 PM |
| 1 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?No? | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/04/20 06:48 PM |
| 3 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?I can't even imagine how shoving a random dick in my vagina would feel anything other than terrible. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/04/20 05:50 PM |
| 3 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?If it doesn't seem unpleasant to you, you might have a hard time relating. For me, it would feel terrible, both emotionally and physically. I'm not sure how else to explain it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/04/20 05:42 PM |
| 3 | Forget what RP says about women who are sluts, forget about the platinum blonde cliches - what do you think a N-count over 20 says about a woman in her easly 20s?I would assume there's an emotional neediness there that she's seeking, and mostly failing, to fill. And that might be unfair, but it would still be my knee-jerk assumption unless I knew a lot more about her. For the women I know, including myself, the idea of rampant casual sex is repellant. It's not about "choosing not to" as if we are denying ourselves a thick, calorie-laden slice of cheesecake or something. "Oh, that looks amazing, but I shouldn't." On the contrary, it sounds awful. The chee… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 20/04/20 04:46 PM |
| 1 | Think about the hottest sexual encounter you’ve ever had. What about the other person or situation made it so unforgettable?Just a random Saturday at home with my husband, when the weed had us exactly the right amount of fucked up. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 16/04/20 06:09 PM |
| 3 | Do you find being called cute to be an "insult" or take offense to it?Context matters. I'm a professional woman with a great career, in my early 40's. Being called cute at the workplace would be fairly disquieting. If my husband does it? I'm charmed. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/04/20 02:17 AM |
| 9 | What are your height preferences/requirements for a potential boyfriend?Honest answer: I don't give a fuck. I can't really see myself dating a literal dwarf, because that seems pretty physically awkward, but if you were 6'5", we couldn't kiss or sleep in the same bed easily, that's also awkward. I have no preference at all on the range in between. My first husband was my height (and I'm a little on the short side), and it never bothered me a bit. My current husband is a couple inches taller, and I still don't care about it. I believe the evidence that most women car… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/04/20 01:55 AM |
| 1 | Q4All: Have you ever been in love?I'm in love with my husband of 11 years. We're both pretty close to the "center" in terms of masculinity/femininity, and enjoy a very egalitarian relationship. I adore him, and I adore our life together. I wouldn't want it any other way. PPD is just like a car accident I can't look away from. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/03/20 11:04 PM |
| 7 | Q4A: If a man and woman switched genders, what is something they would both be most surprised by? What "advantage" that they were expecting would turn out to not be so great after all?And they'd be profoundly disappointed in the sex itself. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 19/03/20 10:08 PM |
| 1 | When women talk about what they want in men they are (unintentionally?) only talking about men who are already physically attractiveCaveat: I think you have to change "are physically attractive" to "they are attracted to". It's not the same thing. It's very possible to be attracted to someone for lots of reasons, but the attraction itself is key. Then, yes. A guy will say "I am looking for a nice lady to settle down with" and the entire world knows the "...that I'm attracted to, of course," is implicit. But if a lady says "I'm looking for a nice guy to settle down with" she will be demonized for rejecting any "nice guy" she … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/03/20 10:01 PM |
| 1 | Q4W: Would you marry a man that couldn't provide for you?This is so foreign to me. I've always worked hard and provided for myself. Both times I married, my husbands made less than I did. I don't expect anyone to support me, in fact the implied helplessness of needing/wanting a guy to provide for me makes me fairly uneasy. That said, finances are one of the primary sources of stress, fights and breakups, so it is important to me that a guy I'm involved with share roughly the same principles I have wrt work and money. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/03/20 07:42 PM |
| 9 | The Telegraph: "Women are being strangled, choked, slapped and spat on during sex - we need to stop pretending this is normal"Yep, same here. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/03/20 07:25 PM |
| 1 | Is height the most important attribute for male attractiveness?Two things. One, attractive people don't turn me on. I think I'm demisexual or something because I have sexual desire, but it's not triggered by the sight of attractive bodies, even if I can recognize, hey that person is beautiful/handsome, etc. I get all the lovely tingles and desire from other things, like closeness, intimacy and trust. There's zero connection between my eyeballs and my genitals. Looking at cute people feels good the way looking at a nice sunset does. It doesn't make me want s… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/03/20 06:36 PM |
| 1 | The orgasm gapSome women do have amazing orgasms from it. Many others feel nothing but pain. The clitoris is weird like that - it's not positioned internally the same for all of us. This is also why only some of us can cum from PIV. It's not rocket science to see that if you were one of the anal-orgasm girls, you'd seek out more anal sex. And if you were one of the pain girls, you'd avoid it. OP is being really obtuse to suggest the problem with women not cumming is not having enough anal. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/03/20 10:57 PM |
| 1 | Q4W - Any of you ever knowingly date a criminal or know an EMOTIONALLY STABLE woman who dated a criminal?Nope, not ever. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 03/03/20 06:18 PM |
| 1 | Men making slightly above average salaries have a right to be wary of gold-diggers since they are the prime targetShouldn't everyone be wary of dating someone who doesn't make a modest effort to pull their own weight? One of my sons is a gay guy making barely above minimum wage, and even he has to be on his toes. The desire to latch onto a SO to cruise through life without work isn't limited to hot 25 year old blonde women. We should all be on the lookout for it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/02/20 05:50 PM |
| 1 | The Sexual Revolution and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race.The whole post is off base. OP isn't mad no one is sleeping with him. He's mad no one has married him. And that has MUCH less to do with the sexual revolution, and a great deal more to do with equal education and career options for women. Women don't have to hurry and settle for any man to support them, because they can support themselves. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 27/02/20 10:08 PM |
| 12 | Let’s play devils advocate - Men, what issues do you empathize with women on that they have to deal with, and women, what issues do you empathize with men on that they deal with?As a woman, I can wear my hair short or long. I can wear pants or skirts, in every color of the rainbow, go out with makeup or barefaced. I can cry when I'm sad and expect my friends to try to comfort me, including with physical acts like hugs. I can be vegan or eat meat. Follow sports or reality TV. I'm allowed to be timid and afraid, and not always pretend to have 100% of my shit together. We do not afford the same to men, without a lot of derision, and I don't think that's right. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/20 10:12 PM |
| 1 | Men paying for datesI like splitting, or take turns treating. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/20 07:24 PM |
| 23 | Let’s play devils advocate - Men, what issues do you empathize with women on that they have to deal with, and women, what issues do you empathize with men on that they deal with?It can be hard to find love if you're not an attractive guy. It can be rough for anyone, but I do believe guys have it harder. Especially if he's introverted, and definitely if he's socially awkward. Also, masculinity standards can be fucking brutal. So many stupid rules governing what is and isn't "manly." As a woman I hate it when people try to impose their idea of "womanhood" on me, and I think this happens far more often to men, and that's got to be just plain exhausting (and infuriating). | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/20 07:22 PM |
| 2 | Let’s play devils advocate - Men, what issues do you empathize with women on that they have to deal with, and women, what issues do you empathize with men on that they deal with?Down voting is against the rules. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/20 07:14 PM |
| 2 | Let’s play devils advocate - Men, what issues do you empathize with women on that they have to deal with, and women, what issues do you empathize with men on that they deal with?I see what you're doing there. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/20 07:12 PM |
| 6 | Let’s play devils advocate - Men, what issues do you empathize with women on that they have to deal with, and women, what issues do you empathize with men on that they deal with?So it's just "No, not all women. Yes, any woman?" I don't have a problem with that. It's basically another version of the "No, not all men. Yes, any man" thing women have to employ when thinking about their personal safety in dating. Yes, we know not all men are serial killers. We still want to meet you at the restaurant instead of you picking us up from home on the first date, etc. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/02/20 07:06 PM |
| 6 | How is sex NOT a need for women?I need sexual release, but masterbating works perfectly well for that. Sex with a partner, I do not need. I am fortunate to be married to a guy who is great in bed. I enjoy that. But prior to him I was married to someone terrible in bed, and sex was "for him" only. So I just masterbated, and that was okay. Exactly the same as before getting married. I've heard from both men and women who get something else critically important out of sex (validation? Connection? Love?) who lose their freaking mi… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 18/02/20 11:20 PM |
| 2 | (For Everyone) On a scale of 1-10 how lookist are you?Somewhere around 0-1 or so. I have fallen hard for ugly/smelly/bad teeth etc guys and would do so again, if our personalities really clicked. I'm a woman. Eta: No, I don't think this makes me a "good person". I'm probably way pickier than the average woman when it comes to dating, in fact. I'm just picky about different things. I need to be very, very attracted to a guy's personality. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/02/20 09:30 PM |
| 12 | Q4W: Do you regret not dating/marrying the guy who really wanted you when you were younger?Right? Exactly the opposite of OP's question. I regret, very much, that I married my first serious relationship, the first guy I slept with. That I had kids with him, stayed with him for a decade. If nothing else, I should have left the moment he stopped being so gentle and loving, and put his fist through a wall, or the first time he cheated on me. I very much regret that I was so devoted to him and my commitment to "making it work" in spite of his increasingly bad behavior. If I could live my … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/02/20 07:16 PM |
| 2 | Do men have a moral obligation to fix what other men broke?"Women should gamble with their lives because my ego hinges on being trusted implicitly." | /r/PurplePillDebate | 06/02/20 07:46 PM |
| 1 | Do all women desire/expect a man with a high-powered career, six figure income, and big dreams for the future?Post history says no. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/02/20 10:46 PM |
| 3 | Do all women desire/expect a man with a high-powered career, six figure income, and big dreams for the future?My husband makes an average wage, lives in an apartment, and plays video games. (I also make an average wage, live in an apartment, and play video games.) I wouldn't trade my guy for anyone else on earth. He's my favorite person, and the notion that I might have passed on him because he wasn't rich, or super aggressive about his career, is horrifying. I love him to bits. I love our life together. And our two average wages is more than enough to live comfortably (if a bit conservatively) and save… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/02/20 10:33 PM |
| 2 | Q4Women: How many of your ex boyfriends were absolute pieces of shit?Boyfriend one: decent guy, super smart dork, I fell damn hard but we were just kids and it did not work out (16/18). No sexual activity, no pieces of shit. Boyfriend two/husband one: Adorable teddybear sweet softie guy with... Poor self control, which manifested in him occasionally breaking out of teddybear mode to lose his temper in a terrifying rage, spend money we didn't have, or cheat. I loved him a hell of a lot, but once broken, some things can't be fixed. Separated to gain perspective, th… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/01/20 12:25 AM |
| 1 | Are you observing more or less successful realtionships in your day to day life?No. Almost every couple I know is just some variation of "marriage is hard work!"-ing it, not happy 90% of the time, holding deep disappointment and/or resentment, but gritting their teeth and putting in their time because they believe, deep down, that this is all they can get. There are exceptions, of course, but they seem to be startlingly rare. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/20 01:13 AM |
| 1 | Women: what about tall men is so appealing to so many of you?It doesn't do anything for me. But you won't believe me anyway. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/20 12:46 AM |
| 2 | Ladies, what would you say most guys you have rejected have in common?I'm only attracted to people I get really close to, first, so by definition, everyone else is on the "no thank you" list. I know this isn't normal, but I can't personally imagine trying to do it the other way around (date first before even knowing if it's possible to feel close and connected to someone). That's just not how attraction works for me. Until we put in some time and build a connection, I feel nothing romantic or sexual. Dating under those conditions would feel like lying. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 28/01/20 12:33 AM |
| 1 | How can the sexual marketplace be “regulated” without basically forcing people to be intimate with those they don’t desire?Of course they do? Incest porn is extremely popular because it's just pretend. Not because everyone secretly wants to bang their sister/father/mother etc. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 26/01/20 01:23 AM |
| 11 | How hard is it really for proactive female online daters to screen out the men they consider undesirable for relationships or hookups?"hey" "hey" "nudes plz" "hey" "smash?" "heeeyyyy" "stuck up cnt, u think ur 2 gd 4 me?" "hey" | /r/PurplePillDebate | 24/01/20 08:17 PM |
| 6 | (For women) What is it that men don't get about women's sexual selection?For me, everyone starts out as an unfuckable NPC. This includes extremely attractive men. I might enjoy looking at them, but nothing else is happening. It's the same exact experience as looking at a beautiful sunset...no matter how lovely it is, I don't want to stick it in my vagina, either. When I get to know someone, when we start liking each other's company, when there begins to be trust and affection, that creates a "warmth," that makes me open to more. Trust, intimacy, closeness, opens me u… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 23/01/20 09:35 PM |
| 3 | Q4A: Is there part of your personality / behavior that you are embarrassed about that proves RP / BP / FDS right?I made one stupid choice when I was young. I had been a pretty good, smart kid, wasn't promiscuous, but then in college I lost my head and chased a good-looking, broody guy because he made me feel special and sexy and gave me a thrill. I lost my virginity to him, we got pregnant, got married, and then over time his true colors came out. He had an occasional violent temper, was unfaithful, uneducated, unmotivated, undisciplined. It still took me years to make the difficult decision to kick him ou… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 22/01/20 05:10 PM |
| 4 | Physical and physiological harm are just about equal in the damage they cause.only one is illegal. Suppressing the emotions of anyone is extremely damagingAre you arguing with someone else? Emotional abuse is still abuse, and can be devastating. We should absolutely be fighting abuse, in all forms, regardless of the gender of the abuser. Please show me where anyone has implied otherwise. All forms of emotional expression are not abusive. Crying is not abusive. This isn't rocket science, and your continued blurring of the lines makes me think you are not arguing in good faith. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/01/20 11:57 PM |
| 3 | Physical and physiological harm are just about equal in the damage they cause.only one is illegal. Suppressing the emotions of anyone is extremely damagingThey are both abusive. If you really don't understand the difference between lashing out in a destructive manner, and crying, well I guess that just underscores why we need better education. Apparently it's not obvious. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/01/20 11:06 PM |
| 2 | Physical and physiological harm are just about equal in the damage they cause.only one is illegal. Suppressing the emotions of anyone is extremely damagingI agree all forms of abuse (including emotional abuse) should be taken more seriously, and everyone (men and women) should be better educated about it. But don't conflate expressing emotions with abuse. You literally started complaining that women were "allowed" to cry, because that did significant harm to someone else. Dude, please. Make a good argument if you want to be taken seriously. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/01/20 10:56 PM |
| 1 | CMV: the women having lots of casual sex before settling down are only a small subset of the female population and more likely than not they have equal status to the guys they have casual sex with.The problem with your perception, OP, is the problem with all our perspectives, and that is that "average" sexual behavior is a myth; there is altogether too much variation across different cultures, income levels, geographic areas, etc to land on any one version of "normal." You and I might have a very similar idea of what the "average" woman is like, but that is only because we have a reasonably similar background. The reality is that outside our little bubbles, human behavior can be extremely… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 21/01/20 07:42 PM |
| 1 | Women Overtake Men as Majority of U.S. Workforce - How will it impact dating and long term relationship prospects?So... We're losing our shit because while it's still not equal, it's less unequal than before? The end of civilization, surely. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 14/01/20 10:22 PM |
| 2 | Q4Women What are some things about a man that would make you automatically unattracted to them?Men who try to solve their problems with their fists. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 10/01/20 01:55 AM |
| 3 | Do guys honestly think that virgins are more likely to try new stuff out?I will guess there is some truth to it, based on the trend that in general, women do not have as much sexual pleasure when young, but gradually learn what "works" for them, and how to assert themselves as they get older. That young woman might view sex as something she needs to "perform" for her partner, and so might agree to all manner of things that he is interested in, even if they don't feel good to her. She thinks, "I guess this is what sex is." Later on, she may get to know her own body be… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/01/20 10:56 PM |
| 3 | Is height the most important attribute for male attractiveness?I don't care about height, and I've never selected for it. My first husband was 5'6, and my current husband is 5'9. These are the only two men I've had sex with. Is it nice if they can reach the top cabinet? I suppose, but that's such a trivial thing when choosing a partner, that nearly everything else is more important. I think the four most attractive attributes are Self-respect, Intelligence, Integrity, and Honesty. I would much rather be with an ugly man with these characteristics, than an o… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 07/01/20 10:30 PM |
| 8 | [Q4WOMEN] You have two options: become someone you would hate to be and get laid, or stay true to yourself and get, at best, two lays from fives every six months. Which do you choose?You're assuming I want "lays." I don't. Casual sex isn't something I'm into, which is pretty logical when you consider that it carries a ton of risks and is unlikely to be physically pleasurable. You're also assuming I care about your numbering system, when I don't. The love of my life is not at all good looking, but he's a fantastic person, and if I was single I would be searching for someone like him. Until I found him, I'd use a vibe and be fine with it. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/20 08:47 PM |
| 1 | Imagine how easy dating would be if average/ugly people stopped chasing attractive people.I can argue this both ways, and I bet you could too. I have known great looking people who were just awful, or boring, or assholes, because their looks got them by and hid the truth about them. I can also think of lots of ugly people who never got a chance to develop good traits, because society isolated them and treated them like human refuse. No one is going to know how to be a witty conversationalist if he's never had a single friend, etc. It can cut both ways. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/20 06:42 PM |
| 5 | believing in blank slate equalism is the root of mens frustration in dating.Speaking from my experience, if men had to have a woman's experience with casual sex, they would no longer want it. While I have a sex drive, it's nowhere near as strong as men seem to experience, so when I'm single, masterbation keeps me happy. Partnered sex is almost guaranteed to be unsatisfying the first several times. It takes awhile to get comfortable enough and "work out the kinks" to where I can even enjoy it with a new person. In the meantime, it may be unpleasant or even painful. We ar… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 05/01/20 06:18 PM |
| 1 | So do women communicate what they want in bed or not?When I was younger, I definitely did not. Part of that is because I had no idea what I wanted. If all you know is that people are supposed to love sex, but it doesn't feel great to you, you might worry that you're "broken," but have no idea how to fix it. And at least he likes it. And seems to have no idea that you're faking it, and you worry he will take it personally if he finds out otherwise. So you just put up with bad sex. It's the least scary option. This seems to be the case for quite a f… | /r/PurplePillDebate | 04/01/20 08:15 PM |
| 1 | The Bem Sex Role Inventory - Where do you stand ?M 87, F 97. "Undifferentiated." I had a hard time relating to any of the questions. Almost all the male questions had to do with destruction or violence. Almost all the female questions were too childish or sensitive for me. None of them had anything to do with sexuality. Pill, no. | /r/PurplePillDebate | 31/12/19 05:10 PM |
| 0 | [Q4W] In what areas do you expect the man to treat you equally and where do expect dominance?Well I mean, we're not a hive mind. I've discussed this with my own identical twin sister and gotten some differences. Personally, I do not want to be dominated at all. Not even 1%. Not in the bedroom, not with the kids, not with finances, not showing off in public. I have a brain, and I expect to use it. If you and I disagree, let's try to persuade each other. I can recognize good sense when I see it, and I'm not at all allergic to admitting I was wrong. We probably each have valuable insights … | /r/PurplePillDebate | 30/12/19 07:12 PM |
| 0 | How To Get Women To Chase YouI've literally never done this in my life. I spend a ton of time picking outfits, doing hair and makeup, and NONE of it is to get attention. I want to look professional, or polished, or respectable, or pretty enough. I want to be accepted by my friends and/or colleagues. Also I want to avoid criticism or people thinking bad things about the way I look. Women are subjected to tons of criticism regarding their looks, even the "hot" ones, anytime something isn't perfect. So you try to protect yours… | /r/seduction | 21/10/19 01:25 AM |
| 16 | I feel basically all success can be defined under neediness vs non-neediness.I am a woman who reads here for the entertainment (some posts are, sorry to say, hilariously wrong-headed), but this one is absolutely on point. When my husband and I were getting to know each other, this was a key thing. He was not good-looking. He was a virgin. I should have held all the cards, right? But I didn't. He let me know, in little subtle ways, that he was willing to walk away. That he liked me, but didn't need me. That he had his own self-confidence well in hand, and wasn't going to … | /r/seduction | 28/07/19 09:05 PM |
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