| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Is he a player or just not that interested?You def did imply it, because you said that being single means the friends is give bad advice. If being single wasn’t “bad”, then the advice leading to being single wouldn’t be “bad”. If being in a relationship wasn’t the goal, being single wouldn’t be “bad” | /r/seduction | 05/07/22 08:50 PM |
| 2 | [23M] How to make up for crucial social milestones I missed out on during my youth?Just a note, I always thought that I had to be interesting to find love and get people to like me but that turned out to be wrong. It turns out that people want to be around someone who brings the emotional tone that they want to feel. So… someone who makes them feel interesting (listens intently to them, laughs at their jokes, remembers what they say, makes eye contact, maybe compliments them), doesn’t talk too much about themselves (nobody wants an “interesting” person who doesn’t seem to care… | /r/seduction | 13/03/22 01:25 PM |
| 2 | [deleted by user]Eh, there's a lot to be said for just being a nice person who pays attention to someone | /r/seduction | 29/12/21 01:07 AM |
| 2 | It's not that 'nice guys' finish last, it's men forced into acting nice as a result of them being too weak to stand up for themselves or their beliefs that will never prosper.I realize this is too late for anyone to see it, but I think that this is the same with "low-maintenance" girls. It begins with a situation where you want to get closer to someone who doesn't seem to see your value. You think they're great. They think you're alright. For whatever reason, they are not inspired to lavish you with gifts, sex, or love. You suspect that if you made your needs clear, and set boundaries saying "I want to get xyz out of this relationship or or I'll leave", they would sa… | /r/seduction | 08/01/21 03:10 AM |
| 22 | Woman in her late 20s with a history of partying, sex, drugs and alcohol now looking for a stable marriage and to settle down isn’t exactly breaking newsThis logic makes sense if physical attractiveness mattered for stable relationships. But it's more like: "attractiveness" determines the pool of who you match with, then after you match, the attractiveness factor fades and your actual behavior/compatibility determines if the relationship works out. It doesn't matter how hot you are (or they are) if you aren't happy together. So... Given that you can find a woman to date you, you have the same chances at long-term success as an average Joe as the… | /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen | 05/12/20 10:02 PM |
| 2 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingI agree with that, for sure. It's definitely a sliding scale. And there are a ton of factors that muddy it. Like, there are factors that will bring you up and down that most people will agree on, like your looks (face and body), competency, confidence, job, education, age, family, history... Plus there random other things about your personality that people will idiosyncratically find attractive. Like, someone might be objectively the best looking, but if they're a jerk then they're not for you. … | /r/seduction | 03/12/20 08:38 AM |
| 54 | Say it louder for the male lurkers who claim we're misandrists huh 😂>Calmly pointing out something that you don't like This is so real. It's amazing how holding up a mirror by simply pointing out their unsavory behavior is seen as an attack. If you're triggered by me calmly describing your behavior and its consequences, then maybe that's a sign that you need to rethink your behavior. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/12/20 11:53 PM |
| 51 | Say it louder for the male lurkers who claim we're misandrists huh 😂And if it happens, it was your fault for letting it happen. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/12/20 11:45 PM |
| 1 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingI think that you are making the "mistake" of thinking about this like a normal human being who sees women as people, not just holes. The person you're replying to seems to be on a different wavelength. | /r/seduction | 30/11/20 07:34 AM |
| 2 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingNot sure what the issue is for someone wanting to check out out with low investment? That's kind of how intimacy works; you start out as strangers and each open up a bit more and put in more effort over time. Like... isn't dating just a way to check out someone as a marriage partner with low investment? Why not just skip the coffee date and get married? | /r/seduction | 30/11/20 07:29 AM |
| 3 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingWow that bit about vibe setting is so true. Imo, setting the vibe is like how a grade school teacher has to set the classroom culture. If they start out a little too strict, they can always lighten up. But if they don't start out with any boundaries or expectations, they're setting themselves up to fail. Success is a very deliberate choice. It takes planning, communication of expectations, and following through when boundaries are crossed. Yet we expect relationship vibes to just magically show … | /r/seduction | 30/11/20 07:24 AM |
| 2 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingThere is a lot of hatred of women (and men) as an entire block on Reddit. It really is disheartening. It doesn't add much to the conversation, mainly because so much of it ultimately does a poor job of mapping onto reality. I think you're dead on as far as it revealing deep feelings of inadequacy. A skilled observer who was playing to win would have more nuance, since noticing and playing patterns is how to win. But a pathetic player, who is resigned to losing, but wanted to make themselves feel… | /r/seduction | 30/11/20 07:19 AM |
| 1 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingCome to female dating strategy! This is the general view there. Don't find someone and try to change them; just don't put energy into people who aren't adding value to your life. (Warning: a lot of people hate the sub because they "misunderstand" it). | /r/seduction | 30/11/20 06:56 AM |
| 2 | Sometimes, it’s just not worth pursuingIt's called assortative mating. Basically, we are in a big market, trying to get the best bang for our buck. So you're trying to get the highest quality mate using your currency, and so is everyone else. And yeah, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But we also all tend to agree generally on who is attractive, and it tends to correspond with youth and health, or resources and stability. How does it happen? Say you're a 6, and you see a 10. You want to date her. She rejects you. Why? Because sh… | /r/seduction | 30/11/20 06:52 AM |
| 73 | Man negs me first, gets violent when i neg him back lolMen: the emotionally stable sex. Just think, if women were in charge, we'd be at war all the time! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 06:09 AM |
| 27 | If This Ain’t A MOOD!!Don't just play the good part of what is going to happen. Play out the entire scenario, and see the consequences too | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/11/20 01:22 AM |
| 36 | Petition Signed 😎 💅🏼Ah, yes. Too much sex: the source of the dreaded pencil dick. Or the source of a short, fat lil sausage. Whatever is the most convenient for shaming. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/11/20 05:53 AM |
| 7 | #YesAllWomenI've been feeling this pressure also (27F). Growing up, my mom was a SAHM, and did an amazing job. On the other hand, my dad was a doctor who worked 60 hours a week for pretty much his entire career. It felt like both of them were in a competition to do 75% of the work required to run a household. Now, I feel like being a housewife isn't good enough; it's been scorned. So instead of just being like my mom and being proud, now I feel like I have to be both of my parents. It's really overwhelming. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/11/20 08:56 PM |
| 19 | Most men my age are permanently undateable because of porn. Yes, permanently.I wish I did. Unfortunately I didn't stand up for myself. He was my "friend". | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/11/20 10:00 AM |
| 80 | Most men my age are permanently undateable because of porn. Yes, permanently.Yep, had an ex co-worker tell me (unsolicited) that I was a "small tits brunette", and proudly say what a boob man he was. Also he watched porn not in incognito because he "wasn't embarrassed". He was a TA. I'd be mortified if anything popped up in my suggestions, but nope he didn't care. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 09:59 PM |
| 62 | Sharon Alger wrote a fantastic article about FDS in Medium titled ‘Why Men Really Hate Female Dating Strategy: It Works’Men from the trash subs all want to marry a virgin. But, if you're pretty and relatively sociable, the truth is that you'll get a lot of male attention. So to stay a virgin, you will actually have to a) recognize your worth and b) shoot down a LOT of people. ...Aka FDS strategy. Men who don't get this truly don't understand what it's like to move through the world as a female. They want some naive, perfect woman to be overwhelmed by them, a moldy potato in a fedora, being the first one to tell h… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 08:48 AM |
| 84 | Sad but true, gotta just laugh at this point 🤣Wow. This. Recently realized that going from happy and confident to "hating myself and feeling like I'm worthless, incompetent, and unlikable compared to my partner" ISN'T actually a sign that my partner is so amazing and that I'm lucky to have them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/11/20 07:59 AM |
| 7 | She flew across the world to go on a date with him and he broke up with her when things got tough. They are married now, so happy ending, I guess!The YT comments are so supportive of her, too. Stuff like "wow this IS like a Bollywood movie" and "you're an angel". Like, he tried to dump you multiple times, and you stalked him? Yikes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 11:36 AM |
| 3 | He keeps telling me he's "relaxed"?I agree with this! It sounds like an affirmation of who he wants to be. Whether or not he actually IS that thing is a different story. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 10:55 AM |
| 20 | Saw this floating around on Twitter and thought we could do an FDS version. Please share your examples of non-compliments from LVMOoof this one cut deep! SO true. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 10:51 AM |
| 20 | He simply does not want to meet your needsAnd when you do come across a woman who does seem to be clingy/needy, 9 times out of 10 she's in a toxic relationship and the way she's behaving is in response to the way she's being treated by her SO. This. I was listening to a podcast recently where two exes were talking, and the guy was blaming the girl for being cRaZy and "toxic" with her "trust issues". Turns out that he had multiple VERY close female friends, including exes. Not that that is inherently bad, but in one example, one of these… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 09:27 AM |
| 61 | Awaiting the matriarchal overthrowI wasn't allowed to watch Rugrats because my parents didn't want me to think it was okay to act like her. :/ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 09:04 AM |
| 64 | Quick Survey - How Did You All Find FDS?Yes! Me too! I heard that there were "a lot of crazies". Then I came and found this life-giving sanity. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 06:23 AM |
| 19 | Why did he ask these questions?This sounds a lot like these questions, taken from a psych study where they used questions with increasing intimacy to form bonds. Note #30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself? https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.amp.html | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 09:27 PM |
| 24 | I’ve felt like this belongs here 💅🏼I've learned that an early sign of this is "my mom is crazy". My LVM partner told me how annoying and crazy his mom was. Meanwhile she was the breadwinner for his family (and LVM dad, my exbf's favorite parent, who rolled his eyes every time his wife talked and made skeezy comments to female grocery store employees). My HVM partner told me how his mom is the strongest woman he knows, and a personal hero. How she has strong opinions, and they drive each other nuts, but he loves her anyway. Meanwh… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 09:15 PM |
| 39 | I called myself hot and a man said I was being conceitedIt's very dangerous for women not to know/acknowledge their own attractiveness. If you don't think you're attractive, you aren't watching for signs of predators. You will not be watching for signs that a co-worker or professor is crossing the line, because you'd just assume he didn't like you. Then suddenly you're in a situation where you're alone with this person and he is making you uncomfortable or trying to coerce you into sex. And his rationale is "well, when I joked about sex with you, you… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 09:09 PM |
| 21 | Don’t let a relationship make you “comfortable” and lazy; always be increasing your personal value and earning potentialAgreed. And so often, they don't recognize the investment. All they see is that they're doing so much better than you, and your life has stalled while theirs has taken off. Which they assume is entirely because they're awesome and you're a dead weight. ... conveniently forgetting about the times you did emotional labor to pick them up and encourage them when they were feeling overwhelmed, read and edited their essays, sat them down and pushed them to work, talked through their work social issues… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/11/20 08:56 PM |
| 8 | If he doesn't make you cum he doesn't care about you or respect you!Honestly, even with an eager partner it can take a while to train them. People have different tastes, and they sometimes need time to learn what you want. Also sometimes I need time to trust them. What matters to me is that they're a) putting in the time on their own accord, and b) genuinely taking my input. As long as those things happen consistently, they will learn and we will get there eventually. I try to say "I like it when you do X better than Y". It tells them what they are doing right a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/10/20 08:03 PM |
| 6 | If he doesn't make you cum he doesn't care about you or respect you!Lol reading the comments on this thread got me over that fear pretty fast: https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/comments/ido254/my_bf_prefers_to_eat_me_out_when_im_ripe_instead/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=shar All of the comments are about men who not only love giving oral, but also prefer it when their woman is unshowered. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/10/20 07:52 PM |
| 2 | If he doesn't make you cum he doesn't care about you or respect you!I'm allergic to being eaten out, and my significant other was actually devastated when I told him that he wouldn't be able to. Instead of giving up (like my previous significant others) he invested in some allergy pills which he now surprises me with in the middle of the day. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/10/20 07:43 PM |
| 1 | Spotting red flags is self-protection ✌️ Have a good day ladies!I have started to ask "would I ever do this to someone I cared about?". If the answer is no, let em go | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 08:38 PM |
| 88 | Why can’t men get this through their brains?It's all about who controls women's bodies. "I hate men" because they're trying to control my body and get something from it. Men "hate women" because they can't control their bodies and get what they want from it. It's the difference between saying that you hate robbers and you hate the people who have locks on their doors. Just not comparable. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 08:13 PM |
| 47 | Everyone’s on their phones everyone can shoot you a five second textI also have ADD, and sometimes I don't get back to my friends and family for a couple of days. That being said, they know me well enough at this point to know how I am. On the other hand... when it's a new crush? I can't stop thinking about them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/10/20 01:06 AM |
| 24 | I'm not easily accessible anymore. My energy is something not everyone gets to experience. I feel like a Queen having a say on who I even allow to enter my personal space.Yes! The pandemic has been a wonderful lesson in the difference between friends and acquaintances. So many people don't deserve my extra effort, my secrets, my care. Focusing my energy on a few key people has done wonders. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/20 11:43 PM |
| 17 | Moved to the US.. can't believe how men treat women hereHow are European women different in their dating behaviors? I've been trying to figure this out for months. My current SO is European, and you just eloquently described a lot of the differences that I couldn't put my finger on. Like, that he has real female friends that he isn't trying to sleep with. He is real friends with his exes. He pushes me with my goals and expects me to push him. He doesn't see me as a sex trophy. He gets flowers and eats me out without expecting to have sex for it, etc.… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/10/20 05:31 AM |
| 3 | Why Being “Funny” Is Killing Your Attraction [Dancing Monkey Syndrome]Yikes | /r/seduction | 26/09/20 07:22 PM |
| 3 | Why Being “Funny” Is Killing Your Attraction [Dancing Monkey Syndrome]It's not about being "too funny" it's about having a one-sided conversation. Women laugh at a lot of stuff, and sometimes it's just to be polite. If you're just talking AT someone it becomes very clear to them that you are using them to feel validated, and they as a person are irrelevant to you. They quickly feel that they're just an audience for your insecure ass. If you're not letting them talk, then they don't have any control over the conversation so you don't even know if they are vibing wi… | /r/seduction | 26/09/20 07:20 PM |
| 6 | Mens' biggest advantageYes haha and the comments by OP are super cringey... | /r/seduction | 19/09/20 12:50 AM |
| 3 | Mens' biggest advantageYikes | /r/seduction | 19/09/20 12:48 AM |
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