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fookengruvin Archive

View 1 post and 25 comments by fookengruvin on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

20 years of marriage in Oregon and you may end up paying lifetime alimony. My ex knew this and used it to leverage me.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 03:47 AM
1

Only the married time counts for alimony calculation. The attorney told me to roll with it. And as horrible as it looked, it was still a good deal. I could have been much worse had the ex tried to max me out. Once the paperwork was filed it went through within a month. I'm free and only paying child support. The key is getting your alimony set to 0 so it can never be increased. It sucks that I gave up the house, but it is better than almost completely giving up my future to that woman to get may…
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 10:01 PM
1

Thanks to everyone who said lawyer up. It was well worth it just to hear that the deal was not a bad one given the situation. It sucks to be pressured into a situation to avoid lifetime alimony, but it's better than shelling out for the rest of your life.
/r/Divorce_Men11/01/23 04:08 AM
1

It makes even more sense where I'm at since it's for life and doesn't automatically stop in my state when they cohabit or get married again. As I understand it, it is very difficult to get adjusted downward too.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 11:46 PM
1

I'm going for long-term comfort by not paying alimony. Waiting on word from the lawyer to see where we stand.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 12:32 PM
1

Lawyered up.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 12:28 PM
2

Totally agree. The problem is that I can't find any resource that shows how to calculate the lump sum in Oregon. And that's where the lawyer comes in. Right now, going up 255k in net worth to avoid around 1.2m alimonybover life seems like a deal. In the longer term, equity distributions, ESPP, and bonuses will make me whole again.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 12:27 PM
1

Doing exactly this. I'm SOOO glad I got the legal insurance through my work... I'm waiting to hear back from the lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 12:19 PM
1

Agree totally. I'm not signing shit until I hear from my lawyer. All the deals she has sent me are all lopsided in her favor.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 12:17 PM
1

Dude, I totally agree on avoiding that alimony. Im avoiding that with about 255k of my net worth after the split. The deals we've been working on have all excluded spousal maintenance/alimony by including that lump sum payout. I negotiated her down in a lot of areas, I haven't signed anything yet, and I lawyered up, too. I've been crunching numbers to figure out where I'm going to land and how hard it's going to be. I have a nice income stream now- It's going to take me about 3 years or so to re…
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 12:13 PM
1

6k total month. I'd have to stop the 401k and stock buy and give her one complete check a month at least.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 03:15 AM
1

If she didn't have my kids, it'd be a much simpler decision.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 03:13 AM
2

Yeah. It wasn't just the weight. Changes in her personality were even more of an attraction killer. She used to use sex to manipulate me or came after me when she was in the fertility zone on her month chart. It was always on her terms.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 03:11 AM
3

I'm don't think she really is looking for a man at this time. But the possibility is there. The weight loss is mostly from the stress of fighting all the time and walking on eggshells. I doubt she will get down to hot again. I think what will happen is she will just gain it back like she has on every other diet she has been on. I'm not going to stalk her. Don't care. Don't want to know. I'm in a no-fault state, so it won't impact the divorce. I'm ready to move on from this and start my new life.
/r/Divorce_Men06/01/23 03:04 AM
2

She's my niece and came from a pretty bad situation.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 09:01 PM
10

This was my experience. She was pretty hot at 5"4" 140lbs, but not so much blown up to 250. We had both been in the military and were fit. I lost interest in sex too when she gained that much.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 04:39 PM
1

In Oregon, the long term marriage spousal maintenance does not stop when they marry. It's lifetime after 20, but it can be adjusted when income changes. But their spouses or live in mates do drop the amount.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 04:35 PM
1

I make around 176k and she 45k.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 04:24 PM
2

I'm shamed to admit it, but I did look there. Plenty of places do citizenship by investment or real estate. I'm not sure I could live with myself if I did that, though
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 04:21 PM
0

2700 for child support and 3600ish for maintenance by the calc. She dropped the child support to 2k with the lump sum agreement. Monthly alimony would exceed the lump sum in over 5 years. I'm expecting to live 25-30 years. It seems like more of a bargain when looked at that way. But at the same time, I highly doubt Im going to be able to maintain this income level until I retire. As I understand, I could be left with as little as 40% of my take home between both. And I'd be able to pay off a dec…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 04:19 PM
2

The child is also my niece who's been through abuse too. She's family.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 03:20 PM
2

I agree with you on the lawyers. I'm pushing for mediation. Even with this current deal she proposed, she could go back to court to modify the CS. We could go somewhere else and get two places cash for the equity in the house and cash we have. And yeah, I totally feel like it is punishment without counting what I went through. Things got a little heated last night. But we both don't really want to involve lawyers in anything but a very minimal way. And she really loves the house. I suggested a d…
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 03:16 PM
3

It's lifetime in Oregon after 20. Doesn't even stop when she marries. It only ends when the income disparity does. If I were to maintain my income level for life it would come to over a million.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 02:55 PM
3

I came to the same conclusion. And yeah, we are trying to go it without lawyers. We have been planning to adopt her since we took her on qround 4 years ago. Oregon is no-fault state and I dont really have proof. I could end up much worse off going to court. I'm consulting one today.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/23 01:51 PM
1

I'd avoid the shots. They have the potential to permanently reduce your body's ability to create testosterone. Look up doctors willing to prescribe chlomid for the off-label use of blocking the hormone/signal that shuts off testosterone production. You will take blood tests periodically to measure progress while taking it. I went from under 400ng to 1000ng in a few months. I'm going through a separation right now- my libido is pretty much killed. I'm probably going to hit up a doctor myself soon…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/23 10:07 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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