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free_as_a_tortoise Archive

View 0 posts and 64 comments by free_as_a_tortoise on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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30

Without hyperstumuli like porn, people often find themselves attracted to what's in front of them. Works in all male prisons and among residents in old folks homes.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 11:29 AM
1

I've dated lots of women who wouldn't have even noticed me if I didn't first confidently strike up a conversation with them. Otherwise I'm just some short brown skinned guy they know nothing about.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 04:05 PM
0

Are you aware that men are individual human beings, who often have very different values and perspectives, and don't necessarily hang out with other men whose values and perspectives clash completely with them? I don't know why "BY OTHER MEN!!!" is meant to be some mic drop moment like we're part of some telepathically connected network. Men who act like assholes are assholes. We don't hang out with them. Or have any influence over them. Because they're assholes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 02:49 PM
–

If there's no attraction at all, why even try to have sex? I'm assuming that 2 people having sex are attracted to each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 11:30 AM
–

Still there are often many things that can obscure that. A lot of people have first time nerves but flourish once they feel safe.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 09:27 AM
2

I don't know if I'd say it's all BS. But it's made out to be a totally intrinsic quality instead of something which has some intrinsic parts to it, but most of it needs to be built by the two people.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 01:12 PM
4

I think a sex life can't be absolutely determined from the first time. They're built more than found. But it doesn't stop people looking for a finished product that's perfect for them that they don't have to put any work or communication into shaping. A bit like their criteria for relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:26 AM
6

The opposition wing of women not finding Jeremy Meeks attractive was extremely quiet when he was becoming famous. The comment sections weren't exactly even handed.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 12:52 PM
–

One of the hottest girls I've ever dated was an average looking girl who consistently and progressively weight trained for 4 years (with proper weights in proper lifts, not stupid pink dumbells or body pump classes). But when I see her pictures now, I see she had a very average face. I actually decided I needed to speak to her before I saw her face. Just from how she looked from behind in jeans and a short coat in winter. I think women often say a fat girl is so pretty, but for a man, a woman be…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 11:36 AM
1

Really depends on his circumstances and goals. If he was recently divorced after 15 years, do you expect him to just jump back into marriage?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 02:37 PM
1

Is the human family still based on the pater familias?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 04:09 PM
1

Not really. I became a better looking man (and most importantly more confident/charismatic - I've been lifting since I was 13 and had abs most of my life) in my 30s and had my promiscuous phase. Now I'm in the best relationship I've ever had. Your failure to address any arguments put forward but instead use strawmanning and ad honinem attacks is noted. I would suggest in the future you keep the focus on what people say rather than imagining what their life must be like.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 06:01 PM
1

Can you find where I said "good looking = bad personality" or are you insistent on projecting extremes that I haven't said, like the idea that you choose not the hottest guy in the world = "3 and below"? Prisoners are more likely to be chosen by women for sex and having children than the average man without a criminal record. Hybristophilia is quite a common thing. And I wasn't talking about custody. I was talking about who gets access to sex and reproduction, then doesn't stay with their partne…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 05:24 PM
3

So the higher standards are simply superficial and not anything to do with vetting for good character. As I suspected. The number of single mothers being multiple times the number of single fathers (I.e. Many women getting pregnant by the same irresponsible men) suggests the "not an obvious douche" standard has not yet been implemented. Those of us who matured know that it doesn't matter how physically attractive someone is if they treat you like crap. So we start to value other things more than…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 04:46 PM
1

Are the standards now "not obvious douche" (glad you finally got around to that) or "now he has to be at least 6 foot 14!!! with 12 pack abs and makes at least 16 gazillion dollars!!!" and still choosing the obvious douche because he's hot?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 03:33 PM
0

Exactly this. And many women find a man who asks her if she's enjoying something to be a turn off. It's not dominant enough. There's no toleration of a learning curve or figuring out what both people like. To one girl I'm too rough to another not rough enough. Both expect me to "just know". You know, like in the movies. If you're not great the first time, there won't be a second time. Most women that I ended up having one night stands with, I never intended to just be one night. I wanted it to b…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/24 06:02 AM
6

I married my first girlfriend then later divorced, got into pickup and rapidly increased my body count. Now I'm in a relationship again and it's definitely much harder to remain monogamous than when I had much less experience. So I think it also works this way with plenty of men too. Maybe some can totally hit the brakes and change their life on a dime, but for me the dopamine-bonding habit of new uncertain variety was harder to break.
/r/TheRedPill19/11/24 09:59 AM
1

I've met a lot on there. I live in Poland.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 12:18 PM
3

And both are entitled to the consequences of their choices
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 05:50 AM
6

Th idea that men aren't attracted to hot but broke women is wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 05:46 AM
0

Yeah the communicating with a real person with sexual intent would be the cheating part for me. But my girlfriend and I have watched porn together and we understand it's fantasy and not real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 09:04 AM
4

Engagement with a real person in real life would see much more detrimental to a relationship than looking at a photo/video of someone's boobs (for a man) or imagining a scene in an erotic novel (for a woman), both of which won't happen in the real world.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 06:49 AM
4

Instagram has entered the chat
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 03:50 PM
0

Well, for a one night stand maybe. I don't think women lose desirability as such through promiscuity and tattoos. They just shift it from "wife material" to "hit it and quit it" material. Different audiences with different intentions. Someone still wants them. They might just not want them for keeps.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 03:49 PM
2

For short term, the promiscuous girl with tattoos is going to be way more fun in bed. For building a life together with someone less impulsive and more long term focused, the less promiscuous one without tattoos is a safer bet. Sex lives which are satisfying in the long term are built intentionally more than found.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 03:47 PM
3

I saw the stats yesterday. Way more girls have tattoos than guys. Something like 36% to 21%. I always thought it would be something I have to tolerate, but I'm actually really grateful that my girlfriend does not.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 03:40 PM
3

Not particularly. If I could have married a virgin (as I was) I would have. There weren't any available in the very secular and promiscuous country I lived in though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 03:38 PM
9

Every human being can make choices which make them less desirable to many members of the opposite sex. Not every member, but there are things they are preferred by many. It doesn't make someone worthless if they make a choice that makes them less desirable to the majority. Why are they measuring their worth only in terms of their desirability? Also there are things that make women more desirable for short term relationships that are antithetical to being desirable for long term relationships, so…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 02:33 PM
2

First half was spot on. Second half seems to greatly misunderstand what ebo psych says. It can point out trends as having evolutionary origins. It never expected us to be perfect or excluded cultural practices (themselves evolved in specific locations and times and not successful outside of them).
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 05:06 AM
2

You can like and respect someone without even having a honeymoon phase. It's a much better base to walk into love than to fall for a mirage then get upset and resentful when it's not real. And I think many men notice the correlation between attraction and emotional instability because of the following: 1) exceedingly physically attractive women suddenly being given huge amounts of preference and power in relationships with most people not daring to call them out on negative behaviour. 2) the muc…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 09:33 AM
4

There is also the fact that the most emotionally stable woman with good values, probably isn't as hot as the crazy hot girl who he knew would not make the best mother to his children. And some of them also have anxiety around relationships so might sleep with a guy but never be comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship with him. Some really beautiful girls, even those relatively normal, even choose "safer", less physically attractive men as they feel safer with them than someone who c…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 05:59 AM
–

I'm so sorry for your loss and the difficult circumstances that led to this.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 05:52 AM
–

I'm curious as to how you ended up owning a preschool. I always imagined that demographic was always comprised of people who were pro- having kids of their own. "I love kids" always seems to go with "I want some of my own someday".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 04:23 AM
1

How typically US-centric of you
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/24 05:57 AM
1

It still doesn't determine if they like her or are just trying to pay for the privilege of looking at her outward appearance
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/24 05:56 AM
-1

When someone is a stranger, anything more than a token gift of drinks is elaborate. I have no problem paying the bill when she deserves it. I never even thought of just paying for one person. That's not really in the remit of men if they want to date successfully in most countries. She cannot deserve it, and I cannot know that she deserves it, by simply existing and being pretty. I need more connection than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/24 10:22 AM
1

Where are you getting a meal for 2 for $20?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/24 10:08 AM
5

Exactly. I love that I can be really generous with my girlfriend but I only do that after the relationship has been established. Why would I pay for the meal of an equal human being I don't yet even know? It's the financial equivalent of love bombing. Many women don't look at the downstream effects of their filters.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/24 09:15 AM
–

It just illustrated to the world that women in their feelings can't calculate statistical probabilities, and see men as a hivemind, where each member is collectively responsible for the actions of those he has never met nor associated with.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 04:02 AM
2

I'm 40 and have been dating my 23 year old girlfriend for a year. There aren't many girls in that age range who are thoughtful enough to enjoy my time with but a handful exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 12:18 PM
–

Yes. But still the men make the first move, even if they're shit at it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 02:16 PM
–

In the more traditionally feminine parts of Europe (not saying France qualifies for this), like Poland where I am, you're more likely to get struck by lightening than approached by a woman you don't know. I've had girls I know suggest meeting up with a large helping of plausible deniability though.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 11:52 AM
–

My experience: 1. Want genuine love and connection so don't want to rush things 2. Always end up losing the girl because some other guy swoops in and fucks her even if he doesn't want her for more than one night 3. Do more sexually escalating, end up racking up bodies but not finding that deeper lasting connection 4. Realising that the type of girl who has been chasing guys who won't text her back after they fuck, isn't going to be wife material. 5. Become extremely selective and happy to lose g…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/24 07:40 AM
3

Don't be overweight. If you can't fix everything, fix what you can. Sincerely, A short brown 40 year old guy with a hot, intelligent, kind 22 year old girlfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 05:16 AM
12

Inherently, nothing. But societal norms aren't based on inherent values. I'm half Asian and half European. My mother's culture would find nothing wrong with telling someone they look fat, or talking about bowel movements. But the culture I grew up in would find those things to be taboo. It's all arbitrary but it's a game that has to be played if you want to fit in.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/23 06:14 AM
7

Don't focus on the part. Just say she looks pretty.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/23 05:59 AM
1

Been there. The girl I had the biggest emotional highs over ghosted me out of the blue. Twice. What my emotions tell me and what I logically know are best for me are not always aligned. That's a feature not a bug of life outside of hunter gatherer society.
/r/TheRedPill02/12/23 04:28 PM
3

Join the ROCD subreddit And do the exercises in the book How to Stubbornly Refuse to Make Yourself Miserable by Albert Ellis (one of the greatest figures in psychology). I've struggled with the same feelings. I felt like ditching my hot, beautiful, loving 22 year old girlfriend most of the time I've been dating her. Sometimes I felt no attraction to her and the idea of playing the field again seemed very attractive. But rationally I knew she was a great girl and this quest for certainty would ne…
/r/TheRedPill30/11/23 09:44 PM
52

This. I wish there was a world in which you could have all upside and no downside in your choices. The most stable LTR partner and best mother to your children probably won't be the hottest girl you've ever fucked. But choosing one thing means you miss out on others. And you can't get all you want because you want more than you can logically or logistically get. That's not a bug, but a feature of existence. Don't be led by your feelings. Have something bigger than that to define yourself.
/r/TheRedPill30/11/23 08:52 AM
1

I'm 40 and dating a 22 year old medical student who speaks 3 languages and is very thoughtful and communicative. It's the healthiest relationship I've ever had. We have similar senses of humour and both love to dance the dance style. Although we haven't danced with each other that much since we got together.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/23 06:27 AM
14

I know redpill is supposed to be amoral but this is the type of shit that makes us look like psychopaths.
/r/TheRedPill10/07/23 12:58 PM
5

I think many women don't realise that height is a visual and superficial trait that they're filtering for well before they even consider personality. I'm fairly short and realised that I shouldn't take too seriously what women say are their minimum standards for height in a partner, or treat what they filter for online as identical to what they would filter for in real life. What they say and what they do are entirely different. But if I did take it seriously, I'd also be really depressed about …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/23 06:52 AM
2

Maybe because he made a career out of fitness modelling and coaching. Strength training is training that works for those who don't have a lot of time. It doesn't have to take a lot of time or take over someone's life. It just requires effort and a scientific approach. Stop being in denial about this and projecting all sorts of things onto people who have this approach.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 01:56 PM
2

And how do you know he is affected by any of that? I haven't seen evidence that that's true in his case.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 01:21 PM
3

Because this is what happens when a male with his genetics trains for 2 x 20 minute workouts per week. What if he doesn't have lots of time to spend on cardio like you're suggesting to try to achieve a fraction of the health benefits that strength training does?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 01:10 PM
4

What purpose does it serve? How about: Stronger bones, tendons, joints, heart and lungs Less fatigue during daily life Improved testosterone production leading to improved sex drive, self confidence, and sustained youthfulness Improved immune function Improved neurological health, reducing the risk of neurological diseases Improved mental fortitude from pushing oneself out of one's comfort zones How is any of that narcissistic?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 12:55 PM
5

Most bodybuilders don't hit the gym every day. You're speaking in imagined hyperbole. Check out Jay Vincent on instagram. He trains a max of twice per week.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 12:46 PM
5

You really can't tell someone's intelligence or education just by looking at them. Every "sapiosexual" i ever met believed she could and discounted intelligent people who didn't look like nerds because they didn't fit the predefined character she had imagined.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 12:44 PM
3

I spend literally one hour in the gym per week over 2 workouts to be in good shape. The level of intentional ignorance you have about exercise science and presumption about people who have standards for their own fitness, is off the scale.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/21 12:37 PM
1

Related to this topic... Does anyone else also notice that a girl's height has very little correlation with how big her vagina is? I've had loose small girls and super tight taller girls.
/r/askTRP20/04/21 12:34 PM
8

The nofap reset is hard as fuck but it works. It changes perspective over time. I ended up wondering why the hell i lowered myself to get off on watching a girl who was fucking someone else (or in any case not fucking me).
/r/askTRP09/04/21 09:37 AM
1

"vast majority" Nope. Only the loudest. For years I listened to women complaining about how much they hated unwanted approaches so much that I had to be 1000% sure it was the right thing to do before approaching. Thankfully, in my mind 30s I stopped listening to them and my life has been much better as a result.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/21 02:42 PM
2

This is absolutely not the case. There's a huge amount of red pill content about the excitement and attraction you got together with your girl through being necessary to keep her. And lots about avoiding mentally ill women.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/21 02:30 PM
1

I'm also living in Poland (I'm British). I think things are still much better here than the UK. And the Ukrainians and Belarusians here are helping to keep the femininity standards high.
/r/TheRedPill21/03/21 12:32 PM
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