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fussyfish Archive

View 2 posts and 33 comments by fussyfish on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
21

fussyfish/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 02:02 PM
2

fussyfish/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 08:45 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Teledogvt, The divorce was rough. That is no lie. She still tries to contact me about every little thing, even after two years, even though I've blocked about 70+ phone numbers and social media accounts. I made the mistake of wanting to care for her until the very end by paying for both lawyers. She racked up an almost 20k bill just asking stupid questions. My lawyers cost about 5k. Under their direction, they split the house's profits by 70/30 and gave up only one of my 401k. My lawyer and the …
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/24 04:08 PM
1

No no, I wanted to pay the lump sum. The goal is to be free of anything with her.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/22 11:27 AM
1

Story of my marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 03:02 PM
1

I do not know. That is why I posted.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 05:25 AM
1

Unfortunately, I don't see that happening.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 02:02 AM
1

Sure the more intelligent financial decision may be to pay the alimony. With BPD, I have effectivity been in an emotionally abusive relationship where she has preyed on guilt and manipulation to get what she wants. I want no contact afterward.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/22 02:01 AM
1

How would I get it down to five years if she doesn't want to negotiate?
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 11:05 PM
11

Dating during a divorce is generally a bad idea overall imo
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 10:23 PM
1

I feel for you, man. I'm in the beginning stages of divorce with a BiPolar and BPD wife. Every day is a rollercoaster. I can't wait to get off this ride.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 08:12 PM
1

Well fuck. I KNEW my wife had Rapid cycle Bi-Polar/Major Depression when I met her. I went to support groups for this, and I was ok with this for the longest time. In the last 5-7 years, it has gotten worse to the point that I am looking at divorce, posting in this forum. I finally started to listen to the audiobook: "Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist," as u/gattsama suggested. Holy shit, this really hit home. I'm only a few chapters in but yeah, she has BPD, and I am in the caretaker…
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 11:56 PM
1

Congrats!
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 01:32 PM
3

Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 01:30 PM
2

I read this last night, but nothing sunk in for some reason. Rereading it this morning and answered those questions. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 11:36 AM
1

Thank you for the comment. I hope it does get better.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 11:21 AM
1

That is a fair comment. I'm not going to say it is only her fault. Over the years, I've attempted to pull her out of the house and do things together. I've made a very clear point that if she needed anything or to interrupt me playing online, she is the priority. I wait on my wife hand and foot; I, until recently, doted on her all the time. The feeling is that it isn't returned, and I'm being used for the home and medical insurance, plus I take care of her.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 11:20 AM
1

Thank you, Mate!
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 11:06 AM
2

Fair point, but where does that weigh in for alimony? Having a job and potentially being able to get a job are two separate things
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/22 12:58 AM
3

Borderline Personality Disorder I was just stating what the 20 years of doctors have labeled her since I've been involved. I will head over to that channel shortly. Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 11:49 PM
1

I'm sure that is the case. This is what she is currently labeled as.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 10:08 PM
5

That is the plan!
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 10:07 PM
1

Sorry to hear this. I hope you are doing better nowadays.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:43 PM
1

I guess I will find out when I meet with the Attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:32 PM
1

Valid comments. Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:31 PM
3

The comment made by a user Gattsama in another post is what got me thinking. I haven't read, watched, or listened to anything suggested but the book's title: "Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist" by Margalis Fjelstad, had me say, "Wait, that is what I'm going through" out loud. https://www.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/y3e4si/on_the_fence/is9t66a/?context=3 Again, super thankful for this insight, Gattsama!
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:30 PM
2

I feel stupid for asking but how do voice recordings work? Do I need to carry something with me around the house at all times and if I get a phone call? Are you open about it or try to be sneaky?
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:21 PM
3

Wow, there is a lot of tough love in this response and that link you provided. Knowledge is power, and this is something I needed to hear. I appreciate it.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 09:18 PM
2

To clarify, she got her degree before I met her, and we are in our 50's. However, when she is upset, you are correct she is very sharp and will go for the jugular during arguments. The last paragraph is a toss-up; I think she would when she has a full head of steam. Down in a blaze of glory, so to speak.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:55 PM
1

I feel for you! What you can do to help me is tell me the rest of the story. Did she calm down? Where are you in the process? How long do you think it will take to be free?
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 08:29 PM
2

I've tried that for about ten years now. I get maybe a week of bliss each year this way.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 04:38 PM
1

an option to consider, thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 04:36 PM
2

I hope it goes well for you in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 02:47 PM
5

A restraining order may be the way to go. The pill is very hard to swallow, indeed. I can say all this logically, but emotionally is very different.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 02:43 PM
3

The illness prevents her from holding a job. I feel like I'm on the hook for keeping her financially afloat - at least in the eyes of the divorce court.
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/22 02:40 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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