~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| 1 | How do I love?I'm in a similar boat. My view of it is this: Everyone's heart opens up differently. That's why your buddy might love someone who you can't see anything good in, but its still love. Your heart might be 'picky'. It might be in a 'dormant' stage. There wouldn't be anything wrong with that. Sometimes the heart has a long winter, and then it comes out again, in Spring. Trying to love others is good. You can focus on and meditate on what is good about others. But this may not mean that your heart ope… | /r/seduction | 28/09/14 09:10 PM |
| -1 | Where do y'all meet the intelligent and intellectually curious women?C'mon, goofballs -- how much frigging time can you spend walking around an art museum? Especially if your interests aren't even the reason you're there. How wonderfully incongruent. "I think this is an early Matisse--- oh wait, I dont give a sh*t!" The world isn't a vending machine whose buttons you press to avail your own loneliness. You don't reach into it, like a candy jar, and pick out the sweet-treats you want. People are brought together by higher forces, and standing around at libraries w… | /r/seduction | 24/09/14 03:56 AM |
| -1 | How do you know when they're just being friendly?Don't bother assuming they're attracted. You will be wrong about that so often that it isn't worth it, in my view. Wait for the one's who give unambiguous signals. You might think now that grasping for each attractive girl is a "good strategy", but its an exhausting lifestyle that will burn you out after a year. Most guys who talk it up haven't done it for any length of time. Making a bunch of attempts to get close to people you don't click with is exhausting. So if you're talking about "young m… | /r/seduction | 24/09/14 03:18 AM |
| 1 | Can't tell if I have impossibly high standards or if most women I meet aren't worth dating."Which imperfections should I put up with and which should I not?" Maybe you could move from an analysis-based view of your own sexuality to a feelings-based view. If a girl turns you off, you have to trust that, and follow it. Even if it means having dry spells. You can 'hack' your own process and sexuality, and use mental scheming to "convince myself to lower my standards" -- but it just results in one never-ending mess after another. Your feelings are already giving you an answer, just follow… | /r/seduction | 22/09/14 09:55 PM |
| 1 | Seddit, I really, really, really need some help on thisSame here. I had the same feelings. Basically when you digest difficult feelings, it causes your soul to blossom. You actually made a decision, prior to being born (or your soul made a decision), that it would swallow large quantities of difficult feelings. This is so that it would become very strong. So those feelings are there for you to swallow, digest, and absorb. Other people didn't want that much pain, possibly because they sensed they couldn't handle it. When you absorb it, through feelin… | /r/seduction | 22/09/14 09:33 PM |
| 1 | Going out with people. It's important to be authentic. It's important to bring positive energy. How can I be both real and positive if I'm extremely depressed?my view: You cant be positive with others when you are nursing internal wounds and are stuck in a funk. That is your real state, there is no reason to conceal it, or spruce it up. Your difficult inner world is authentic. That is therefore the only thing you can authentically convey. Developing a layer of societal shlack on top of that is hardly going to be useful to anyone. Any manipulation of appearance to save face is inauthentic. That is the definition of inauthenticity. It is well-intentione… | /r/seduction | 20/09/14 02:30 AM |
| 2 | Was told I'm not a "good time charlie." How do I change that?"I want to be the good time charlie." Generally the pattern on pickup boards is this: psychologically complex guy finds relating problematic; complex guy idolizes psychologically simple guy who gets laid without conscious effort. [ complex is not superior to simple, but it is a more advanced stage of expression ] The issue is this: psychologically undifferentiated, group-(herd)-mentality persons are able to mate with a larger amount of people, because their hearts and minds, while unique, have n… | /r/seduction | 02/09/14 11:20 PM |
| 3 | What could be the reason a man only attracts marriage minded women but never the ones interested in flings, hooking-up, FwB, casual sex?Possibly because you yourself are unconsciously seeking out a deeper connection than what you believe yourself to consciously want. You think you want "sex", but at a deeper level, YOU are looking for something more. Thats why they come. | /r/seduction | 29/08/14 01:51 AM |
| 1 | Is Zan Perrion's stuff legit? What are your opinions on his philosphy?I can say my opinion on this, since I do in fact have one. Zan has a powerful, very unique, and extremely poetic worldview. Women are a central part of this worldview. His positivity towards women -- which goes above and beyond what even 'normally positive' guys tend to put out there/experience/feel -- is undoubtedly a very potent way to explore intimacy. A person with such a positive view is likely to have positive experiences, because like attracts like. There are no guarantees, because love i… | /r/seduction | 27/08/14 12:49 AM |
| 1 | How to give love/value? [CYC&Models]Value is a tricky concept. I will act like a temporary tour-guide through this tangled forest of concepts, and you see if any of these thoughts are worth keeping... Right now, your viewpoint is focused on a specific kind of value: The obvious, undeniable contribution of a loudly positive person who "brightens everyones day". That is one kind of value. Do you know what another form of value might be? I've known several brilliant, but also "fatalistic" or "cynical" or "jaded" dudes. Actually some … | /r/seduction | 17/08/14 01:52 AM |
| 1 | I'm kinda confused right now, some advice would be awesome.You wrote: "Now the obvious thing is probably simple, go out there and get shit done, start approaching and break out of the shell. Or would it be wiser to work on issues beforehand? I feel these things kinda crawl out and show themselves when I interact with people." There are two sides to self-development. There is an outer side, which is just feeding yourself with new experiences. Those experiences can unlock insights and lead you to realizations. Its for this reason that people say -- "Get o… | /r/seduction | 17/08/14 01:39 AM |
| 2 | [meta] Sometimes this sub feels like it's the blind leading the blind, am I the only one with that impression?You're onto something with this. Pickup has a 'textbook'. Guys can and do memorize this textbook, and then quote it off to one another like holy scripture. I dont agree with the textbook at all. I think its a blueprint for playing cat-and-mouse games with bar-hopping 20-something ugs. That's not what I want for myself. At one point, though, I was so confused that I did not know the dirty secrets of pickup (e.g. the lies and self-delusion baked into its frame), nor did I know what I wanted. And g… | /r/seduction | 07/08/14 02:01 AM |
| 1 | How do I tell the difference between confident and creepy?Creepiness is forcing something that shouldn't be. Like expressing sexual interest to someone who you barely know at all. You can both 'feel' where the boundary is, and when you consciously overstep that boundary -- perhaps because you have rationalized that 'this is how I get laid'... As an aside, its also just a general slur term for anything that makes a woman uncomfortable. Women who are sexually uncomfortable will find almost anything creepy. Some women get creeped out by almost any sexual … | /r/seduction | 20/07/14 06:18 PM |
| 1 | Here is a challenge for /r/Seddit. How do you reach the Hook point, explain this in one sentence.True. But the circuitry you are engaging will be 'polite socializing'/'flattery'/'curiosity'. This leads to lots of numbers and very few relationships. | /r/seduction | 20/07/14 06:13 PM |
| 8 | How often do you realistically get rejected?Cold approach game was analyzed by Good Looking Loser and he said that a good looking guy who is a beginner will realistically get laid 1 in 100 times. If you are good looking and have some charisma, you may get laid 1 in 30 times. Its the deep dark secret of pickup. One of them. | /r/seduction | 20/07/14 05:45 AM |
| 2 | Anyone being completely them selves and still have trouble?Being completely yourself is a wonderful thing, but doesn't guarantee that anyone will click with you. You can only ever have relationships with women whom you 'click' with. Forcing, coercing, rushing, or in any way manipulating that click mechanism is impossible. Yet that is the goal of pickup. Its largely an impossible goal, but that doesn't stop people from trying. It may take many years of experience to realize that this is impossible. | /r/seduction | 20/07/14 05:42 AM |
| 1 | Here is a challenge for /r/Seddit. How do you reach the Hook point, explain this in one sentence.Recognize that only a very small percentage of girls will ever be 'hooked' by you, and that your intention to hack the mechanism of female choice is an impossible and childish fantasy. | /r/seduction | 20/07/14 05:36 AM |
| 2 | I've had trouble bonding emotionally with women my entire life. Where do I begin to fix this?Desiring to have a bond with someone is a pretty wonderful first step towards having a bond with someone. If you suspect you've been valuing something below its worth, you can decide to try to value it more. For example, if you feel you have undervalued connection and communication, you can decide to try and value that more highly. Please don't blame yourself if you're personality is naturally a more 'inert' one -- e.g. tending to connect less. There may be very deep reasons for this, and they m… | /r/seduction | 18/07/14 11:30 PM |
| 1 | How to.. well.. not give a fuck?"You know that there is always another equally hot and equally awesome girl just around the corner, and you know you'll be able to talk with her and see what sticks" -- Thats actually not true, by the way, guys. How do you not give a fuck? I'm not even sure that thats an appropriate goal, honestly. I know a bunch of pickup industry luminaries have sold and oversold it a million times. Not caring is your key to freedom, etc, etc,. Sounds like a great idea. But its very unnatural to not care, and … | /r/seduction | 05/07/14 09:58 PM |
| 2 | Do I need to have all those "tricks and cards" like DHV etc. if I want to become better with women?No way. Most of this process is about clearing up your own confusion about how dating, mating, attraction works. Its less about 'becoming' a certain type of guy, and more about realizing that its OK to chill out and let whatever happens happen. Its framed as some kind of social adventure, its actually more like ongoing therapy for guys with severely distorted worldviews. Here's a paradox- doing the things you mention, will make you suck WAY more with girls. But because you will have chosen to ob… | /r/seduction | 30/06/14 02:01 AM |
| 1 | why people mock PUAs, and the unintentional game of disinterested men: dual realities.So clearly we're of different opinions, and maybe there's no need to resolve it. But I will respond to what you've said. "If men's looks were all women responded to, then the same would apply to men who are gaming her. But it has been proven time and time again that looks are not all a woman responds to and the right opener can spark attraction, this isnt theory, its experimentally proven, tried and tested." Actually it was never proven, because attraction is not something that can be objectivel… | /r/seduction | 29/06/14 05:09 PM |
| 3 | why people mock PUAs, and the unintentional game of disinterested men: dual realities.I disagree with a couple things. "When they see PUAs like us making an effort to actually create attraction they go apeshit bc of the implications: if it takes this much game to get a woman attracted, and he used no game, then she's not w him bc she's attracted. That is the hidden offense of the PUA. So mock the PUAs "these guys have to use tricks bc women aren't NATURALLY attracted to them" but he ought to be saying this about himself." 'Creating attraction' has got to be the central fallacy/co… | /r/seduction | 29/06/14 02:39 AM |
| 1 | Eliminating MysticismDissolve the barrier in your mind that makes you think you are not a woman. You are a woman, in some spiritual sense, just as much as you are a man. Believing that you inhabit some well-defined conceptual boundary doesnt mirror the reality of our being. We put on these masks, our chromosomes differentiate a certain way, and we somehow believe in them too strongly. There is a spiritual reality that reigns supreme over this material reality (study actual mysticism if you want to understand this ) … | /r/seduction | 29/06/14 02:06 AM |
| 10 | After years of self improvement I still don't feel a whole lot more confident in myself. Why?There are wounds within each of us that do not heal by themselves. They are there in everyone, but they express differently in everyone, and everyone hides/ignores them. So welcome to the Open Secret. Everyone else is confronting the same abyss, and most don't even have the honesty to acknowledge it. That includes whoever you've been reading and getting advice from. You "bought the lie" that a series of external lifestyle changes would alter the emotional reality you experience on the inside. It… | /r/seduction | 26/06/14 12:41 AM |
| 2 | Something about RSD just rubs me the wrong way...There is a darkside to RSD and the Game, just like each of us has a shadow side to his persona. Its like a spice which, taken in large amounts, becomes a poison. Many people are taking this spice/drug at dosages where it could be considered poisonous. But thats a part of their learning, I guess. I wont hate. Some of you guys are obviously new to this, but I've been shooting the shit about this stuff on message boards since 2007. RSD has been around a LONG ass time. And for just as long, guys hav… | /r/seduction | 24/06/14 02:18 AM |
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