| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 12 | 36M, how is dating | Dating After Divorce | giantblueasian | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 12:30 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | 36M, how is datingLol fair. I've always had a young look. I probably looked like a 12 year when I learned to drive, and I was carded until close to 30 and still occasionally. I've exercised, played sports, or lifted for nearly my whole life so there was only a brief time I wasn't in shape. People at my current wife's work tell her they robbed the cradle so at least I have that going for me. The number of years just feels like a lot of wear and tear on me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 09:37 PM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingI generally don't have issues woman being attracted to me. I just feel like I'm aging to a point of being an old dad or something if I have kids. I was really looking forward to starting a family | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 09:35 PM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingIt is very reassuring to feel you're not alone. I've reached out to a diverse group of close friends that I have. I'm lucky to have as many as I do that I can trust with this. The supportive people on here have also been great like yourself. It really is building a strength in me I forgot I had or didn't know. Knowing and hearing many others have survived this gives me strength to carry on. It gives me hope for my future that I was losing in dark thoughts. Thank you again! I definitely will reac… | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 04:07 PM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingThat is definitely a goal of mine to know myself in a more complete manner and present that person to the world. I've hit a point where I am starting to feel my power back. The stuff I used to have. My situation is intense, but I'm fighting through it. Whatever doesn't kill me only makes me stronger. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 03:56 PM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingThank you for this thoughtful reply! It gives me hope and strength in this really rough time. I've been struggling for weeks, but now I'm just feeling like I need to prepare myself. I have been trying to work on my own issues, 5 therapy sessions deep in 3 weeks. I know my worth is very high. It definitely hurts to see my spouse do this to me, but I know I'm valuable. I take care of myself, I have a high paying job, I'm good looking, I'm intelligent. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 03:35 PM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingShe makes about the same as me so if we're talking half, there really shouldn't be any give or take. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 01:26 PM |
| 2 | 36M, how is datingWhy not both? | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 04:49 AM |
| 3 | 36M, how is datingI'm in the top 10% of earners by region. I don't have the luxury of having a child yet. I was hoping to plan that this year with my wife... | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 02:52 AM |
| 5 | 36M, how is datingBipolar disorder | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 02:22 AM |
| 4 | 36M, how is datingI guarantee you it's not all of them. Just avoid the ones with BP | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 02:15 AM |
| 2 | 36M, how is datingYeah, I know. My brain plays chess 20 turns ahead so unfortunately this is a move that I see in my future. I'm trying to line up to be okay if this happens. I'm already in therapy, I have several close friends that are aware this is happening and are all behind me. I guess I'll have more time for the gym too. She'll likely take our dog, so probably need to adopt for some companionship. But being alone feels like the hardest thing. It's going to hurt at night | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 02:13 AM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingWell fuck | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 02:01 AM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingShit. I used to do pretty good for myself in my 20s. If it's easier now being a more whole person, that makes me feel like it'll be okay. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 01:45 AM |
| 1 | 36M, how is datingThat's good to know. I'm well put together. I feel like I wouldn't have that patience either. It was fun in my 20s, but I just want someone to be with. But I feel like I'd be picky. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 01:43 AM |
| 2 | 36M, how is datingYeah, I don't want to be thinking about this, but my mind is trying to protect itself so I'm rationalizing myself being okay after all of this. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 12:48 AM |
| 3 | 36M, how is datingI'm very fit, well educated, good looking, and caring. Thank you for your feedback! It helps to know that | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/09/24 12:45 AM |
| 1 | Hurting and feeling aloneText or call your friends. Let your close ones know what's going on. They'll have your back and support you. Get a therapist. You need people to talk this out with. It's good to know there are others out there going through stuff, but talking with those close to you is best. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/24 03:03 PM |
| 3 | Hurting and feeling aloneI'm going through my own version of the OP's post. I'm trying to be stoic. Did you just one day do it or did you work on it? Any suggestions? Still cohabitating. She even still says she loves me and is in love with me, but that's almost feeling like gaslighting at this point. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/09/24 02:57 PM |
| 3 | Infidelity of the soulIt will. We will all be better. You're not alone in this world. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/09/24 10:05 PM |
| 3 | Infidelity of the soulBelieve me, I'm right in the middle of it, so I have all the raw emotions too. You have to want to forgive. If it's not normally within you to forgive, you have to want it and invite it in. It may not happen all at once. I had a previous relationship cheat on me, and it took time, but I ended up pitying her in the end but no hate, I was able to let it go knowing it wasn't me or my choice. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/09/24 09:42 PM |
| 3 | Infidelity of the soulThese are all rationals we tell ourselves because we are rational beings. They live in emotions, so the world can look very different to them. And if your wife has any mental issues. That just exacerbates it. But yes, she has at least 50% of the blame. Try not to hold in anger for her. I am working my best at not being angry because it will only hurt you in the end. Yoda said it best, "Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering." You need to be able to forgive her and your… | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/09/24 09:17 PM |
| 1 | How long til the pain fades?I'm not divorced...yet. I hope I won't have to. I have different circumstances of why it's degrading, and now another person is involved. She says she still loves me and is in love with me and finds me romantically attractive, but at the same time, our romance has been bad for a while due to some internalized stuff from me and a health issue of hers. I also have an anxious attachment style. She is distant with me and then close. All of your emotions are ones I'm feeling too. I don't have any foo… | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/09/24 09:02 PM |
| 3 | Infidelity of the soulMy marriage of 5 years is teetering on a knife's edge. Our romantic life has been rough both due to some of my weird internalized shit and her health issues. I came to this sub to find hope for myself if things go to hell. But seeing your post, I've been doing a lot of therapy and reflection. It takes two in a relationship. Sure you might have not done something right, but forgiveness and love is what a relationship should be. Both parties need to want it. You can take ownership of your part in … | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/09/24 08:52 PM |
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