| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 101 | First message asking me to travel 85 miles to meet him | ROAST-A-SCROTE | h_witko | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:00 PM |
| 45 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'? | SEEKING ADVICE | h_witko | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 01:32 AM |
| 31 | Cervical screening support needed | SEEKING ADVICE | h_witko | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 06:40 PM |
| 27 | I hope he picked her | PICKMEISHA HALL OF SHAME | h_witko | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 02:01 PM |
| 20 | Haven't had a good neg in a while. Also, it's quite clearly a rabbit not a hare... | #JustLVMThings | h_witko | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 02:31 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 8 | Was this lovebombing? I still think he can do no wrongHis behaviour and treatment of you is not a reflection of you but of himself. Men like this don't care what you are like and you can't fix them. FDS has loads of posts and info on this sort of guy, but that's the gist of it. You were 100% expressing valid things and the fact you're questioning that is likely that he engaged in gaslighting to make you doubt yourself. | /r/askFDS | 28/09/20 12:58 PM |
| 37 | FDS helped me change my competitive views on other women, thank you all so much!This is amazing! It takes so long to undo the damage that our misogynistic society does to us. Don't be too harsh on yourself when you slip up, you're learning and putting the effort in. That's the important thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/20 08:32 PM |
| 63 | Was this lovebombing? I still think he can do no wrongThat's 100% lovebombing. That is like, textbook lovebombing. He did what he did to get you and get you to do whatever he wants. Then when he was done, he dumped you. People who behave like this don't respect you. The want something from you. Whether that's as simple as sex or validation or whatever. Combine that with the negging, and you've got a grade A LVM. He took the trash out when he left and you should be grateful for that. He could have engaged in years of abuse, but his goals were differ… | /r/askFDS | 27/09/20 02:18 PM |
| 37 | In this episode of “which kind of maid am I today?” we’re hair-cutting maids.I don't like it when you get it wrong but here we are! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 07:36 PM |
| 26 | Another proof you shouldn’t tell men your insecuritiesThis is my concern when I re-enter the world of dating. I got out partly because of Covid but also because I need to get to the point of leveling up that following the FDS handbook is easier. I joke with my friends that I'm going to marry for money because if you're going to get cheated on then you may as well make some money out of it. But I know that it's partly true. So many men value themselves as to how easily a woman will sleep with them, how can they ever genuinely enter into a monogamous… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 05:18 PM |
| 13 | How to buy a car without getting taken advantage of?If you go to a dealership, do a lot of research as to the specific branch, not just the company. When I bought my car, it had a service package attached. I got the service done in the city I live near and they tried to screw me over on my tyres, saying they needed replacing. Luckily my dad knows about this sort of stuff and told me they were fine and perfectly safe. This was in January and I had my MOT last month and there was absolutely no issue. This was done at a place my parents have been go… | /r/askFDS | 24/09/20 05:12 PM |
| 33 | I'm grateful to my (male) friend who got me to stop being a pickme!Probably stuff like 'I prefer to hang out with guys because girls are too dramatic'. That's the standard one Edit: grammar | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 04:57 PM |
| 4 | All good until the last one... Why is it so difficult for women to realize that porn and sex work is not liberating and exists solely for male pleasure?I'm pro sex worker in the sense that I'm glad that prostitution is legal in my country, but also glad that brothels and pimps are not. I support those that do the job and believe that they should have access to support, healthcare, security and justice if things go wrong. I do not support those that pay for sex. I don't support those that make money off of other people's sex work. I don't support people who abuse sex workers. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 04:56 PM |
| 9 | Breaking up with the best boyfriend I've ever hadThat's the perfect way to describe him, he was so bland! Until after the rejection and I got his 'post break up rejection texts' where he tried to make himself feel better, that was amusing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 05:09 AM |
| 15 | Breaking up with the best boyfriend I've ever hadYeah exactly. I dated someone for about a month and he was really lovely to me. For me it was a little much and a little suffocating but I'm just not big on that sort of thing and he was listening to me. But just a few things he said rubbed me the wrong way. I called my friend about it (the sex was horrific as well) and she was like, you actually hate him, why? And I realised, he'd shown his true colours and I just didn't want to trust my gut and judge him on that, but I had to. Like he'd claim … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 04:34 AM |
| 15 | Breaking up with the best boyfriend I've ever hadYeah that's exactly right! There are things that can be disagreed upon and things that can't. A lack of respect or love for others cannot be disagreed upon and still have a healthy and happy relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/09/20 04:21 AM |
| 74 | Breaking up with the best boyfriend I've ever hadThis is a different situation than I had with my ex but it's ringing bells for me. My ex was also great with his words. He was so manipulative and could twist anything to mean the way he wanted it to. I have to admit it's an impressive skill but it took me ages to realise that I wasn't crazy and that he was actually being emotionally abusive because he was just so silver tongued! You know you did the right thing. People can think different things but in a relationship, your morals and ideals sho… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 11:56 PM |
| 50 | How can I atone?Firstly, this is a question for a therapist. Your first step in atoning should be to find a good one and commit to regular sessions. There is a lot of damage to undo and then you need to learn to forgive yourself whilst holding yourself accountable. That's a difficult balance to get right and you need a licensed medical practitioner to help guide you. However, I will give some advice and some insight from the other side. Don't reach out to your victims. Don't post a blanket statement online to a… | /r/askFDS | 23/09/20 12:30 AM |
| 25 | The “Blood in the Water” TestAww well I love when women ask me for help. I like knowing that I seem approachable and happy to help others. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 12:17 AM |
| 76 | The “Blood in the Water” TestYou. Are. A. Genius. This is crazy smart! It's super fucked up that it's necessary but it's genius. I'm definitely going to use this when I start dating again. I'm 6' tall and I used to be really self conscious of it. I love my height now, I get little old ladies asking for me to reach high shelves in supermarkets, it's helpful for my job and gaining 5 lbs on me is very different than if I were 5' tall. But obviously it's an standard (but unforgivable imo) insecurity for a man to have so it woul… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/20 11:35 PM |
| 1 | I love you guys and I need some last minute support.This has been shared on FDS before, I'm sure but it just really hit home for me. I hope you enjoy it and find strength in her words like I did. Also, the glitter in her hair!! https://youtu.be/tCWRdp5NAFI But seriously, you are doing the right thing. It's scary, of course it is. Any time you start something new that could be amazing, it's scary. But you know what you need to do. Stay safe and stay strong Queen 👸🏼💝 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/20 07:47 PM |
| 44 | It bothers me so much that most men see sex as something humiliating and degrading done to women and that they see woman as an submissive sex object, just body parts to use. And this is why i hate porn so much... It basically traumatized me and ruined sex for me forever.I've never watched it. I've had a few 'friends' (mostly male but some female) try to convince me to watch it and some even tried to force me (I just closed my eyes). This was before FDS and before I understood why I don't like it. I just knew the idea of it creeped me out. I guess I don't understand why it's so important to anyone? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/20 10:00 AM |
| 10 | Boy do I wish I could not watch my kids because I feel like shit...God you have a nightmare of an ex, but at least you have FDS now! Record this stuff and have a back up, you may want or need to amend your custody agreement in the future and examples of him dropping the ball over long periods of time will help you immensely. I just hope your kids aren't too hurt by his lack of consistency and interest. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/09/20 02:36 AM |
| 7 | What are your favorite things about being single?I love the fact that I can do everything on my schedule. In particular, I love my job but struggle with insomnia and other health issues. I'm fortunate because within health and safety etc, I can dictate my own hours and work when is convenient for me. This often means I'm working until 9pm and my food schedule is out the window. But I'm not letting anyone down and I'm getting my work done and I'm happy. (My work life balance is fine, I swear! Most of my socialising is online anyway due to frien… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/09/20 02:20 AM |
| 30 | I bet it's a man pretending to be a woman.Yeah in my pickme days I did it (infrequently) with the first 3 guys I dated. The only time there was no pain was with a guy who had a micropenis and I was really drunk. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/09/20 01:09 AM |
| 18 | May the fires left by Michael’s errors light your path. 🤣😂🤣😂This grandma's petty sass is inspirational. I'm definitely going to remember this when a man tries to mansplain to me again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/09/20 02:43 AM |
| 10 | How to move on from someone you didn’t even date?It's hard because you're stuck with all the 'what ifs'. FDS is all about block and move on. Which I agree with but during that move on, sometimes you need to grieve and acknowledge that your emotions aren't always logical for the situation/relationship you're mourning. Like he could be the worst NVM but if you had an emotional attachment, you may still need to grieve before you celebrate them being out of your life. Or vice versa in my case. The sadness comes after the relief. First things first… | /r/askFDS | 16/09/20 02:02 AM |
| 1 | If the sex is bad the first time, move on.Thank you, you've explained what I meant better than I could have. Yeah definitely, I had one guy who put decent effort in but I wasn't sure and the bad sex was the final nail in the coffin. It felt like I was just being humped. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 11:37 PM |
| 5 | If the sex is bad the first time, move on.I meant not great compared to what it could be. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 08:24 PM |
| 15 | If the sex is bad the first time, move on.I think it really depends on why it's bad. Like your example is a no brainer, but the first time you have sex is never great, so it's hard to know where to draw the line. I think it's to do with attention and focusing on your pleasure. And definitely learning as it goes on. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 06:39 PM |
| 80 | Should I Reach Out?No, you did the right thing. He was testing your boundaries very early on and while you had a good first date, this is way more telling. Don't text him. | /r/askFDS | 14/09/20 06:37 PM |
| 17 | I don't want to be a "forever girlfriend" but I don't want to get married youngThe thing with the FDS handbook, is that it's great advice but it's never going to be 100% perfect for everyone. It's not one size fits all. When it comes to engagements, the two year rule is great when you start dating at a point in your life that you're ready to get married. Before that, personal timelines are also important. You need to make sure you both have the same timeline in mind and he knows and agrees with your earliest/latest times or events. I'm 25 and am not in a position to get ma… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/20 02:53 AM |
| 8 | Where are we heading?? What's wrong with society? This shouldn't happen or be acceptable. What sort of pickme would accept this? This shouldn't be normalized.Yeah exactly! Ooo I've never thought of myself as a person... It reminds me of an official list of side effects that was printed with some medication I have. It listed 'sexual disfunction' and 'female sexual disfunction' as if the norm is a man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 10:50 AM |
| 6 | Where are we heading?? What's wrong with society? This shouldn't happen or be acceptable. What sort of pickme would accept this? This shouldn't be normalized.So true, but tbf that's usually the case. I've never had sex that wasn't slightly disappointing in some way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 01:27 AM |
| 9 | Dated a guy for a while, broke up due to him showing his true colours, randomly met him at the airport during corona times. Then he tried to keep the ‘conversation’ going. Nothing left to do but block him, if saying no doesn’t take. Thanks for helping me find the determination!Not even just can. They think they deserve it. The audacity they have is probably their most admirable quality IMO | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 01:25 AM |
| 31 | Where are we heading?? What's wrong with society? This shouldn't happen or be acceptable. What sort of pickme would accept this? This shouldn't be normalized.God reading this is just so cringe. Like any woman will jump at the chance of fucking a bloke that's this cringe 🙄🙄🙄🤢 Also, just reading the title made me really want pizza and it's like 2am and I have no pizza. This is really sad 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 01:10 AM |
| 13 | Never let an angry man in your house!Pfffft a man's mind is a crazy place 🙄 the internet is just a tool. I guess that fake name is him showing how little he should be trusted! That's a really good idea, I might start using a nickname, I don't have one I use in person but I do use a mildly linked one on mobile games etc that I can use 🤔🤔 tbf I'm avoiding OLD and just dating in general atm! The last date I went on didn't understand the meaning of the word no and it took me too long to leave, so working on my leveling up and FDS princ… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 12:24 AM |
| 26 | Never let an angry man in your house!Jesus Christ that's terrifying. Was he proud of what he'd done? I have a really unique name, like until about 3 years ago I was the only one on Facebook. I'd be pretty easy to find at work anyway. This is scary! Why do men have to be such freaks? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 12:17 AM |
| 17 | Never let an angry man in your house!That's terrifying!! Did you ever find out how he found you? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/09/20 12:10 AM |
| 3 | I am a pickmesha and I'm marriedYou're not a pickme. You're in an abusive relationship. The user Ebbie45 has so many amazing resources for people who are leaving abusive relationships. The first thing is you don't tell them. You research, you collect your important documents and stockpile cash where possible. Then you leave when it's convenient and safe for you to do so. On their profile, there's so many resources that will help you. You are not alone! And until it is safe for you to leave, you can talk to us. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 02:05 PM |
| 31 | Bet he'll still want her to go half on bills and dates. lolYeah this is written by someone who has never done any of these chores. Filling the water filter takes half an hour? Who goes food shopping twice a day? Why is a meal on the table half an hour before people are due to eat? This is what happens when people only sleep an hour a day! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 01:30 AM |
| 16 | My girl just dropped a LMV thanks to this community!Cool as ice, I love it! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 12:32 AM |
| 4 | All the indicators...'I dunno, is it' was beautifully done. But you're giving him too many hints for how to behave. It makes it too easy for him to pretend to be HV if you do it this way. You can't teach him how to behave well. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 07:13 PM |
| 39 | This scrote is divorcing his wife while she is healing from a broken leg. He hid all the money from her and she is completely financially dependent on him.Spend it setting yourself up, before the divorce proceedings start. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/09/20 01:08 PM |
| 12 | What’s your favourite FDS principle?Don't lower yourself to someone else's level, expect better of those around you and accept no less. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 02:00 AM |
| 15 | LVM bamboozled me into a shit date where i starved and froze to deathI really struggle with this! The audacity leaves me speechless for waaay too long! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 01:46 AM |
| 6 | My LVM ex-boyfriend’s girlfriend called me! What the hellI think you did more for her than would class as the right thing. You helped as much as you were able to, but in the process you opened the can of worms for yourself. Blocking her sucks, but was definitely necessary because she doesn't want to tell her friends about this shit so will keep unloading on you and staying with him. It's not fair on you and you did the right thing to protect yourself! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/20 05:01 PM |
| 12 | Looking for help from my fellow strong ladiesI've only found time to fully help, as cliché as it is. There's other stuff you can do to combat the feelings side of it: Like if you're feeling lonely, do something that makes you feel whole and complete, like talking to friends or something arty that you enjoy or reading or gym per whatever. If you miss the dates you used to go on, make an effort to do dates for yourself. Like go to a bar or restaurant or get a nice takeaway or go for a massage or a walk or whatever. It's partially distraction… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 03:40 AM |
| 12 | Male boss upset that I wouldn’t add him on FBThe British have always had beautiful insults! 😂 It's weird because my boss is amazing, and it's so easy to forget how many horrible people there are. I'm doing a PhD in physics and there's the full spectrum of people in the department, but my group is not sexist or boundary pushing at all. Just a group of weird, lovely people. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 03:30 AM |
| 19 | Male boss upset that I wouldn’t add him on FBYour insta sounds so peaceful! Your boss sounds like an overprivileged wanker though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 03:26 AM |
| 79 | I broke up with my boyfriend because he wanted me to lower my expectations.Yes sis! This is like textbook FDS. It's one thing to know and agree with the theory, and another entirely to be able to do it in practice. V impressive! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 03:06 AM |
| 53 | I know FDS is true because ... (a message for those not-yet-sold and those who deny FDS altogether...)When people say 'not all men are like that' I just reply, 'No, but all men benefit from the shitty ones lowering the bar'. It shuts them up pretty quick. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/20 11:58 PM |
| 21 | Thank you, mods! ♡We love you Queens! You give us a safe space to be women and love each other ♥️💖 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/20 10:58 PM |
| 69 | Peak LVM right hereI have vaginismus and this reconfirmed my avoiding men/sex in general for the time being. The thought of my pain being used for them to get off disgusts me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/20 10:54 PM |
| 4 | What I have done since my separationThis is amazing! Well done you! Sounds like you took leveling up to the extreme! I went to university in York and I cannot recommend a trip up there enough, it's about a 2 hour train ride from Kings cross. If you do want to go, drop me a message, I've got loads of recommendations that you can only really get from someone who's lived there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/08/20 01:33 AM |
| 19 | Thank you, ladies. I told a man to fuck off for the very first time and feel incredible.Fucking yes Queen! Was a gross character. Definitely get your evil eye ready for if he approaches you at work to ask why you blocked him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/08/20 12:03 AM |
| 9 | It’s the effort for me!As well as it being a nice way of making sure there's things she enjoys to eat there, it's also a really good method of making sure there's no special dietary requirements etc. Always nice to not poison someone on a first date... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/20 07:54 PM |
| 7 | Pickmeishas in the comments bragging about being proposed with a recycling project 🤦🏻♀️True but man made diamonds are fine? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/20 07:08 PM |
| 30 | Pickmeishas in the comments bragging about being proposed with a recycling project 🤦🏻♀️It's also that the glass stone won't last. It'll get scratched and will age quite quickly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/20 03:53 PM |
| 6 | I’m so lucky to have my mom (FDS’er by nature). My LV husband keeps using the ‘pity poor little me’ move and this is what my mom wrote me this morning.You are 100% using that right. Saps the value from you because he has none himself. Sounds like you did right by yourself! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/08/20 03:39 AM |
| 1 | Will this ever end? I know I’m enough, that I would rather be single than with an LVM. But I feel sick w loneliness—I live alone and we’re a communal species. The lockdown is fucking me up. I re-downloaded OLD in a moment of weakness and this was the first guy I matched with. JfcThis is a really great answer. It was really straightforward and called him out on his bullshit without giving him room to be aggressive. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 09:49 PM |
| 11 | Honestly, how dareI had a guy approach me in a pub (at like 6pm on a sunny summer day) and say he really liked my 'unique style'. Obviously this was a ridiculous neg that my friend an I saw through immediately, but also, my style is the opposite of unique. It's just completely basic bitch. I was wearing a demon jacket with a corduroy skirt. He proceeded to sit down without an invitation and wouldn't leave us until we left him a to 'go get more drinks'. He definitely had audacity! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 12:06 AM |
| 14 | "Where can you lead me? Not up."The Definition of a Queen 😍👸🏿 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 01:22 PM |
| 14 | Something I madeSo much 'Done with this shit' is portrayed in her face. It's v impressive! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 05:02 AM |
| 24 | Being a Tall womanThis is why I don't date shorter men anymore. I can't be arsed dealing with all that crap. It's emotional labour that I'm not willing to do. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 01:01 AM |
| 7 | paying for dates as a college studentFor me, it's not just about investment and interest from him but also acknowledgement that life as a woman is more expensive. Plus it takes us a lot longer to get ready for a date, and so it's a reflection of their appreciation of that time. As a uni student, (and pre FDS) I never did a dinner date for a first date but in did do drinks. And although I was willing to pay (and probs be less than willing to see the man again), I would never expect or want to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 02:12 PM |
| 13 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'?Oh no, I agree with you, it's often a necessity to stop people getting their wires crossed. However it can be used by LVMs to check they've found a pickme willing to sacrifice herself to be with a man. I definitely want to answer it honestly, but also tactfully and not inviting sexual questions as so often happens. That's a really good response though, I especially like your use of 'partner'. It shows that's what i'm looking for and that I'm not going to be a bangmaid or new mommy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 03:38 AM |
| 11 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'?Exactly! But I also don't want to sound like I'm desperate because that lets them think they can manipulate me and nah | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 02:10 AM |
| 19 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'?That's my concern! I fucking hate dealing with that shit because I still have residual guilt about it. I'm working on it, but would rather avoid that completely! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 02:01 AM |
| 30 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'?Good way of introducing a bloke to my sass early on! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 01:48 AM |
| 19 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'?Ooo I like that! Very non-sexual implications there! Definitely stealing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 01:36 AM |
| 2 | A lesbian who had to learn about men even though she doesn’t date them.Was sorting my notifications and only just saw this, I'm sorry! This thread made me get up off my arse and get him to drop it off at mine, so yes I do thank you! Have you read it yet? I'm the same with spoilers, I need a happy ending! Oh they sound exhausting! How do you deal with them? Yeah I mostly ignore the politics chats because the annoying ones are not interested in listening but only about sounds smart. So I just talk to someone else while that's going on. Oh wow, that must have been a l… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 01:17 AM |
| 6 | Today I broke up with a nice guy. Explanation in comments. Trigger: mentions deathYeah exactly, being a good person is the bare minimum we should expect in a person, it's not a reason to ignore your own intuition! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 11:48 PM |
| 11 | Tried to have an open conversation about our relationship 😬 yikesI will never get over how confident straight men are. It's not 'I feel that you...', it's just 'you are this way'. He thinks he knows you better than you know yourself and honestly sounds exhausting. Isn't it ideal when the trash takes himself out! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 11:37 PM |
| 7 | If I could turn back time......You will feel whole again. It just takes time and some self love. I know for me, some of the pain wasn't about what he did to me but about what I allowed to be done. I had to acknowledge what boundaries I allowed to be ignored and forgive myself for it. That is the only way you can heal and protect yourself in the future. One of the reasons men like this drag you down is because they are unable and unwilling to be on your level, so they have to drag you down in order to feel superior. You are so… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 11:25 PM |
| 13 | 10,000 Km away from home to visit this guy I met online. Did I made the right decision?Oh my god, you definitely did do the right thing! He sounds like a complete arse. I lost my virginity to my first boyfriend, he loved me (and vice versa) and it was actually really great. Obviously there was pain and it was weird and new and the sex wasn't amazing, but I felt loved and respected. He wanted to have sex with me because of who I was and he loved all of me. Yes the relationship ended about 18 months later and he wasn't perfect but losing your virginity is so fucking scary. You need … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 05:31 PM |
| 1 | We can do that after we normalize women needing emotional support😒So. Fucking. True. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 03:14 PM |
| 21 | We can do that after we normalize women needing emotional support😒This always annoys me because it's always the female feminists who have to put in all the work. And why? Because we're expected to do the emotional and mental labour. It's just an extension of sexism. They want the benefits without having to do any work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 12:42 AM |
| 8 | He almost broke up with me after 1 month, now we’re taking a break.The fact that you acknowledge your behaviour is a really great start, well done. And being in therapy too. Both are definitely big steps towards levelling up! However, you shouldn't be in a relationship until you are able to be without traumatising the other person. That's basic levels of respect. It sucks to leave someone that's great, but you're not great for him and you should respect him enough to leave him or let him leave without emotionally manipulating him into staying. We all have bagga… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 12:15 AM |
| 2 | Fds has my block finger strong. Even asking annoys me.Ah okay, I was thinking that he was a colleague or something super creepy like that. It's scary how good they are at hiding their real selves | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 02:21 PM |
| 5 | Fds has my block finger strong. Even asking annoys me.Yeah this is weird, who is he? He obviously had your WhatsApp. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/08/20 12:51 AM |
| 5 | Fds has my block finger strong. Even asking annoys me.Your response was beautiful! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/20 11:52 PM |
| 6 | LMAAAOO another queen out there driving away her scrote. We support you sis. If a man is uncomfortable with this sub, he's NOT A HVM.Gosh golly how awful it must be to feel objectified by someone you're interested in 🙄🙄🙄 sounds like he's not an HVM after all | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/20 11:55 AM |
| 5 | Why are men so 🤮......stay safe ladiesI would have broken his fucking hand. My system, which I've only needed to use once is: They touch me or try to touch me against my will. I say 'Do not touch me, if you keep trying, I will be forced to physically defend myself' If he tries to touch me again, use appropriate force to defend myself. For the situation I had, he was trying to hug me and we were with a group of his friends who were uncomfortable and trying to get him to stop. I realised that demeaning him would be more effective than… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/20 04:04 PM |
| 1 | Getting sh*t for not wanting to move in with a man...thoughts?I personally would need to, because it's a lot harder to hide who you are from someone you're living with. You see the good, the bad and the truth. I guess it would be an extension of the vetting process for me. But I wouldn't buy a house with a man I wasn't married to. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 11:53 PM |
| 4 | First message asking me to travel 85 miles to meet himYeah exactly! Like how ridiculous to ask that of me. He is either insanely ignorant or just awful | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 02:32 PM |
| -20 | This is the kind of guy that would say "wOmEn aRe ToO pIcKy" despite listing TWENTY-NINE extremely specific things he wants in a woman...Tbf freckles and goes red but doesn't tan was one of the only things in this list that I feel describes me! I'm stereotypically English and hate bugs so avoid the outdoors. I think the toenails and terrariums are used to demonstrate a sort of basic bitchness that he wants her to have because he wants to feel like he's with the 'cool girl' without him ever having to put effort into being cool himself. (no disrespect meant to basic bitches, I definitely fit in that category) For the record, I do r… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 02:03 AM |
| 3 | First message asking me to travel 85 miles to meet himOh yeah, big time! They have their flaws but are insanely supportive. My dad's sort of got logic rose tinted goggles for the world, which can be annoying but meant growing up I wasn't treated any differently than if he'd had boys, because logically there's no reason to, and my mum's a fucking badass who gave her super scary evils to anyone who dared say 'Ooo a girl who likes physics' or anything like that. My mum was horrified that her sister said that! Her reaction was very funny. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 01:50 AM |
| 9 | First message asking me to travel 85 miles to meet himAhahaha that's hilarious and I'll definitely be using that. It's her daughter's wedding next year and I'm a tad worried she'll try to introduce me to guys my age. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:26 PM |
| 22 | First message asking me to travel 85 miles to meet himIt's crazy! I will always be in awe of how much confidence straight men have. Luckily I'm only 25 so have a few years before that crap happens. Although when I was explaining to my aunt that I'm perfectly happy alone until (read: if) I meet a man that ticks all the boxes on my list, she told me that the only two things that matter are that he makes me laugh and he's good in bed. It explained a lot about my uncle... Also my parents are very on board with me being single unless I meet the perfect … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:20 PM |
| 16 | First message asking me to travel 85 miles to meet himI haven't blocked him because I'm interested in his response. If he does respond, I won't reply and will block him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 09:16 PM |
| 4 | This man basically accused me of being a user and a slut then asked me to split the bill of our first date. Lmao they are exhausting. Also ever message he sends is a novel and gets mad I don’t respond to every single point made in a timely manner. 🙄He sounds so exhausting! No wonder you don't reply super quickly if you have to put in a solid 10 minutes worth of work to read and respond to his message | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/20 02:37 PM |
| 3 | FDS changed my lifeWow you sound like the definition of a glow up! I'm so sorry you've gone through so much shit but it sounds like you're in a really great place now. I hope you continue to level up ♥️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/08/20 03:53 AM |
| 2 | Cervical screening support neededOh what a nightmare! How long did it take you to get diagnosed? Is it under control or are you still struggling? I've got hypothyroidism and am so fortunate because my mum's friend has it so my mum did loads of reading about the medical sexism, as all the experiments were done on men as out cycles make things harder. So I just made sure to do my period maths before I got more blood tests! I'm on good drugs now and honestly feel so different. It's crazy. I have energy, am losing weight despite ea… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 02:21 PM |
| 2 | Cervical screening support neededYeah, my nurse was very gentle but it was just so invasive. Especially as she was getting near my cervix, it was just awful! A xanex would be really helpful. Oh god that sounds awful. But I'm sure you're a kind face when they need it most! I would have but I had to go back to the lab. I'm doing my PhD and Covid sort of knocked us back, experimentally. I'm going to the pub with my friends tomorrow though 😊 (socially distant and Covid safe of course) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 10:38 PM |
| 2 | Cervical screening support neededOh my god that's awful! At least the other staff treated you properly and she's gone! Now you mention it, I had a snotty nurse who said my cholesterol was high because I wasn't eating right or exercising enough (I was an international athlete at 17, so I love exercising and I love cooking good quality food so always get my veggies in etc). My mum nagged me to go back and it turns out my thyroid is crap and that causes the cholesterol issue. I complained and nothing happened of it but I'm now wor… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 10:32 PM |
| 2 | Cervical screening support neededThank you for your support. I'm so sorry you suffered that and get these lovely invasive reminders. I'm really proud of you for looking after your health in spite of all that! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 10:06 PM |
| 3 | Cervical screening support neededI think it was more to do with the fact I do have a traumatic sexual history. I really appreciate your thoughts but the nurse was great. Really tried her best to put me at ease, stopped when I needed her to and checked in with me the whole time. She was really great. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 09:30 PM |
| 8 | Please share your list of deal-breakers and must haves in terms of values, career, physical, etc.I'm 25 and have dated a few NVM and a few LVM and have compiled this list through them Must haves: - Similar beliefs about social responsibility, not treating people like shit, doing good for those around you etc. - Passion about their chosen career - Be able to afford their lifestyle/to join my lifestyle. - Not be emasculated by a woman succeeding (I plan to succeed, by my own standards anyway) - Must have an (imo) healthy attitude towards mental health, therapy, drugs if necessary etc - Must d… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 09:21 PM |
| 1 | Cervical screening support neededYeah thanks, I'm not that bothered about the personal aspect. I was expecting to be but I guess I realised that it's like when I was a waitress. You don't remember anyone unless they're a wanker! The physical discomfort really surprised me, I think that's why I'm so weird about it. Like, it was so much deeper than anything has ever gone before! (More info than you were probably expecting!) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 08:53 PM |
| 3 | Cervical screening support neededThank you! Yes I'm very proud of myself because I was terrified but booked it about two months after my 25th birthday in the middle of a pandemic! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 08:29 PM |
| 2 | Cervical screening support neededThat's what I was really trying to do but I just couldn't separate it. My sister works in healthcare so I hear a lot of stories that makes it suuuper clear that they don't see it the same way but it was the physical feeling that I really struggled with. I appreciate it, and you're probably right, that's the easiest way to deal with it and move forwards. I just hope my results are clear so I can forget it happened for the next 3 years! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 08:20 PM |
| 2 | Cervical screening support neededThank you! I felt so silly posting this and almost didn't, but I just knew that I'd get the support I needed from this amazing community! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 08:15 PM |
| 5 | Cervical screening support neededThank you, I am doing. I bought my favourite drink and made a huuuuge sandwich and am currently cuddling my teddy bear on my sofa. My female family members were like, 'yeah, it's not fun but it's fine' and while they were lovely and supportive, it did make me wonder if I was reacting differently than everyone else | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 08:12 PM |
| 8 | Cervical screening support neededThat's a great idea, thank you | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/20 07:33 PM |
| 8 | Am I being nitpicky or is this guy being selfish?Legit been in a very similar situation. They blow of your clear concerns about something because they don't care, so they don't listen. He's showing you his true colours, sorry! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/08/20 10:55 PM |
| 23 | Sending me home with an extra mealI hate these sorts of posts. Like you are so clearly the asshole, why even ask? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 10:40 PM |
| 14 | Sending me home with an extra mealThis is so sweet and thoughtful! Sounds like you've got a decent one there 😊 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 10:39 PM |
| 5 | More Pickmeishas normalising abuse and male depravity to appeal to boys on TikTok. What self respecting woman thinks like this?Yeah I can genuinely see how that would help, but the issue is the other person in that. Like for me, my anxiety was so bad I struggled to make decisions so being submissive was a release that allowed me to let him make all the decisions etc. But it went too far and I ended up feeling disrespected because he got off on hurting me and seeing the pain on my face. And that is not someone you want in your life! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 10:35 PM |
| 47 | More Pickmeishas normalising abuse and male depravity to appeal to boys on TikTok. What self respecting woman thinks like this?Literally exactly me. But if you voice it anywhere outside of FDS, it's seen as kink shaming | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 04:01 PM |
| 2 | Why are male dating app profiles literally the most bland things one can waste her time reading with?Ahahaha my favourite is Gouda fucking got me 😂😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/08/20 03:39 PM |
| 20 | Why are male dating app profiles literally the most bland things one can waste her time reading with?At least it didn't say 'rawr, it means I love you in dinosaur' I guess! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 10:50 PM |
| 8 | Does this seem controlling? I’m no longer dating this guy, but he would tell me I couldn’t wear certain things or make any new guy friends and if I objected, he said that I didn’t give a fuck about him. If I thought he was being controlling he frequently called me crazy and irrationalThis is terrifying. He was genuinely trying to completely reprogram you into who he wanted you to be. I'm so glad you've left him. Please stay safe and keep your phone on you, you never know what these sort of control freaks do when their power is broken | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 10:49 PM |
| 33 | Why are male dating app profiles literally the most bland things one can waste her time reading with?Yeah so true! I had this one guy in Hinge, who for all his questions/prompts he just said how much he loves cheese. Like don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of cheese and it was sort of funny the first time, but 3 times just shows he has no actual personality | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 10:46 PM |
| 9 | In addition to questioning my modesty he also told me I wasn’t submissive enough and that he thinks it’s fine to hit children. Dodged a bullet here 🙃What would have been a legitimate enough reason for him? It always baffles me how LVM feel it is up to them to police what we wear. It's like they can see women getting more comfortable with themselves and being in public and they feel the need to put us down. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 06:39 PM |
| 3 | FDS approved movie recommendations?Same here!! It's one of my go to movies when I need to laugh. Yeah, I really like how stubborn he is about doing the right thing. Also, so many quotable lines! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 11:15 AM |
| 1 | FDS approved movie recommendations?I wasn't really a fan of Sean of the Dead. And don't get me started on the world's end! Weird since they're so bloody similar! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 11:14 AM |
| 23 | FDS approved movie recommendations?Knives out. Really good murder mystery, female main character. If you haven't already, definitely watch Hot fuzz. There's a lot of men, including the main characters but zero romance and definite character growth, although there is scope... It's also one of the funniest British movies ever made. (If you're not British don't be surprised if you need subtitles, some of the accents are pretty strong). Also, one great book is called the psychology of time travel. All the main characters are female a… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 01:32 AM |
| 5 | Please tell me if I handled this the wrong way. I can’t tell if I am executing FDS incorrectly, or if he’s gaslighting me.I think you've handled this really well. You've not allowed yourself to be dicked around but you've also not been vindictive either and communicated your unhappiness with his disrespect. The only thing he can bitch about is that you said tomorrow, but everyone knows that just means not today, maybe tomorrow if I've gotten over it. And you shouldn't have. He doesn't understand what he's done wrong. He is unwilling to be in the wrong so is bringing up something he can claim you've done to make you… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 12:21 AM |
| 42 | You Don’t Have to Do ItI've shaved my legs twice since lock down started and while I do enjoy being freshly shaved, I also love the fact I can feel the breeze through my leg hair as I walk! It's like I get a moment of non-conforming pride when I feel it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/08/20 02:07 AM |
| 22 | Don't marry the first freakin' guy who gives you attention. NSFW due to strong opinion.I know what you meant, and what I meant is that unless the guy is an actual good person who respects you, they will see you are not as perfect as they made you out to be and get bored. Or get pissed off. They make a fantasy of you and then get annoyed when you're a real human being who isn't exactly what they thought they wanted. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 12:37 AM |
| 68 | Don't marry the first freakin' guy who gives you attention. NSFW due to strong opinion.They don't. I'm pretty hot, tall, blonde, curvy and athletic with a nice face and I've been treated like absolute shit by shitty men. The only way to be treated right by a guy is to refuse to be treated any other way and walk away from people that treat you wrong. That personal power attracts the right sort of people so much more than aesthetics. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 10:51 PM |
| 1 | I was nervous to share my last post about having a hard time leaving my husband. But I know yall support other women and you proved it to me yesterday. Thank you 💛Yeah same here! I'm 25 too, and had an abusive relationship at 18-20 and I'm still dealing with some of the fallout now. If I'd had FDS back then I might have been able to avoid it! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 05:39 PM |
| 5 | I was nervous to share my last post about having a hard time leaving my husband. But I know yall support other women and you proved it to me yesterday. Thank you 💛♥️♥️♥️♥️ Fucking love this community. I feel like as well as love, learning and respect, there's so much appreciation here too ♥️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 12:47 AM |
| 6 | American dating style?I think it's more like don't limit yourself. Like if you're dating someone and meet someone new, you have no commitment to the first unless there's commitment from them and you feel they're HV? I struggle to find anyone worth dating, so it's not really something I need to consider! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/08/20 05:05 PM |
| 3 | Surely, no high-value couple is 100% compatible. So then what is considered "compromise" vs "Settling"?I personally see the difference as depending on how important that thing is to you. If your ideal partner would work in a similar field to you but you'd be happy with someone who was as passionate about their job as you, that's a compromise, but settling would be for someone in a deadend job. (Used that example because it's important to me) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/08/20 01:03 AM |
| 45 | Scrote Wont Leave My Apt and Im SUPER DepressedHe's not on the lease, call the cops and get him escorted out! He's basically squatting and expecting you to foot the bill? Nah, get him out. You shouldn't have to change your whole life to dump a LVM | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/07/20 12:14 AM |
| 6 | To ghost or not to ghostI have this issue and honestly, I always regret not ghosting. Just do it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 11:54 AM |
| 1 | I sent my husband to jailSounds perfect! Now write that bucket list for your LVM-less life! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 01:17 AM |
| 5 | How do you forgive yourself for past pickme behavior?You remind yourself how hard you have worked to undo the crap that made you a pickme. You remind yourself of the HV people you are working to surround yourself with. You remind yourself that you are so strong that you went against the grain and educated yourself to be better, happier and healthier than society wants you to be. You're doing so well, just by being on this journey. That's amazing and you deserve to celebrate how far you've come, not be embarrassed by your starting point. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/20 10:10 PM |
| 1 | Had a self-care day after a break-up with a toxic guy, and I'm feeling much better! Even though it was just a manicure and lunch, making myself a priority again is so refreshing!This looks/sounds amazing! Love your nails! The best thing is taking yourself on dates doing things that you love 😍 Also, is that a Mac and cheese toasty??? That looks amazing and I can't believe I've never thought of making it before. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/20 08:43 PM |
| 8 | When Pickmes tell you that “you’re too picky” and you think...While I really think dating is important to learn how to actually be a good partner and learn what will make a good partner for you, this is so true. There's a big distinction between settling and dating around. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/20 08:07 PM |
| 1 | I sent my husband to jailThis is amazing!! Well done! Start thinking about what you want from your life, how you want it to be. Think about anything and everything you've ever wanted. Big and small things. Get excited about making those things happen. It's so scary but amazing. Doing the small things makes the big things seem more possible. You will also need to get some sort of support, a DV shelter is probably your best bet as you should get a restraining order and start looking at the ways to protect yourself from hi… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/07/20 08:03 PM |
| 4 | Male socialization means earnestly expecting women to act as charities that do everything for themIt's funny that they've read some of the posts and completely ignored the message. Don't accept a project for a partner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/07/20 06:59 PM |
| 6 | Possible red flag: men referring to accomplishments as "sexy"It reduces you down to being a sexual object. He's reminding you that he only thinks about you as that. I get that a lot, ooo you're so smart, it's so sexy. As if that's why I chose my career, to appeal to a fucking man. It's also an easy thing to 'compliment' because if the job/degree title sounds smart, it's a fairly obvious one and doesn't require any real evaluation of the woman. It's also not a good compliment, I've been told my whole life that I'm smart. I'd rather be told I'm funny or kin… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/07/20 10:27 PM |
| 16 | 'You should feel lucky that I picked you, because for our first date I will cook for you, fuck you for free, and judge you for being promiscious while doing so' SMHLegit so true. Also I work with diamonds and even ones that have just been left to their own devices for a year or so get dusty and need cleaning. So not only is he misogynistic and gross, he's a complete moron. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/07/20 05:15 PM |
| 10 | Ever had your career mansplained to you on a first date? Did a boyfriend tell you that you're too emotional/men are the more logical sex? Then the nine types of reply guy list is for you!I could definitely do with some advice on dealing with the gaslighter! So my dad does this stuff. Like 'Well when I was working at [company], there was no sexism. There were lots of female senior managers. (Lists like 2) Then when I explained how disrespectful he is when saying stuff like this, he gets in a huff and won't talk a lot for a few days. Not so much in a silent treatment way but in a bad mood because he can't cope with being wrong/told he's wrong. I had to explain that by being a woma… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/20 02:12 AM |
| 366 | Here is the follow up to my post from last nightAmazing. He wasted your time, you made him waste his own. Hilarious that he thought you'd still want to meet him after all that shit! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/07/20 05:08 PM |
| 2 | Please let you imaginations run wild picturing the man attached to this bioI definitely pictured Trump saying this | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/07/20 02:24 AM |
| 31 | What the fuck lmao.And he knows it. Negging and emotional abuse is the only way this poor woman will stay with him | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/20 02:05 AM |
| 6 | I finished the handbook and broke up with my bf of 1.5 yearsCongratulations, I'm so glad you're feeling more clear headed already! And good luck on your journey moving forwards. It's a scary but really exciting place to be | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 05:50 PM |
| 62 | 2️⃣🙅🏻♀️1️⃣🤦🏻♀️3️⃣🙎🏻♀️😂😂😂I prefer a more simple, 'why would you show off something so small?' | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 01:53 AM |
| 2 | is my boyfriend a HVM?Yeah that's exactly the same as me, except it wasn't a life time, just a 2 year emotionally abusive relationship. I'm putting a lot of work into overcoming the trauma and this sort of reflection is part of my process to make sure I respond to the situation rather than react. Thank you! It took me a good 6 months to fully believe that, and that I wasn't being a bitch or whatever. But he finally got the picture when I ignored all his messages. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/20 02:28 AM |
| 2 | is my boyfriend a HVM?Yeah that's a really good point actually! Phew, nice reinforcement that I'm not nasty! 😂 That's such a great way of putting it. I once cut off a 'friend' (read LVM) who wanted more than friendship and we were sort of seeing how it went and when I said no to sex, he said 'aww but it'd be fun' and continued to push. A guy who's only had sex with one girl and a fwb, so probably not going to rock my world on the first try! I know that sounds bitchy but meh But then when I explained the next day that… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/20 02:00 AM |
| 8 | is my boyfriend a HVM?Yeah exactly! Like I sometimes struggle to understand how I'm feeling, and need time alone to work through it. But I always explain this, and that it's not a reflection on what they've said or how they've said it, but that I just need to figure it out on my own. Then I come back and we discuss. So to some it could be the silent treatment, but the difference is communication! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/20 01:44 AM |
| 9 | Never forget what manosphere "red pill" men are all aboutWhat. The. Fuck. I can't even comprehend how anyone can think this is acceptable? Why would anyone want a slave for a partner? It's disgusting. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 01:47 AM |
| 9 | FDS when seeing pickme nonsenseGod I know! That's amazing!! My cousin got engaged too and her style is a bit different and out there and the ring is so perfectly in keeping with her style. It's amazing how HVM can really understand the importance of a great ring. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 11:08 PM |
| 15 | FDS when seeing pickme nonsensePlus the rings they buy are always fucking hideous and shitty quality | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 10:44 PM |
| 6 | Toxic ex sent me a “friendly” email to try to get in touch with me again. Don’t fall for it!The 'I understand if it's too difficult for you' is such a manipulative section to this already manipulative message. Like he wants you to 'prove him wrong' by doing exactly what he wants you to do! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 09:22 PM |
| 4 | A man who tells me when to stop and continue talking.He got off lucky. Christ, was this the first time he did something like this? Also, this sub is making you strong, savagery is a side effect of strength when wankers get involved 😜 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 02:30 AM |
| 12 | Know exactly what you deserveThis book sounds amazing! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 02:15 AM |
| 6 | Left my boyfriend of almost 4 years.I know you're in pain but I really hope you also feel the relief of knowing your future will be better without him. He sounds like he was dragging you down. You deserve to be happy and at peace at home, I hope you get that soon! (And pets once you're in a flat that lets you!) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 02:08 AM |
| 25 | Males will deny sexism exists..until they have their own problems and then they come crying to feminists asking us how we will solve their issuesTHIS! I had to explain to s supposedly HVM (thought he was before this) that it shouldn't matter if he personally benefits from feminism, he should support it and it's not the women in feminism's responsibility to do the work for both men and women. Men feel entitled to everything a woman has, and so if they've fought for over a century for something, they think we should fight for them too. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 12:28 AM |
| 11 | Circe transforms into a HVMCirce by Madeline Miller | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 05:47 PM |
| 12 | Circe transforms into a HVMSo weird! I just started reading this last night! I got really annoyed with how pick me she is with the fisherman though so stopped reading. She actually improves then?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 04:23 PM |
| 10 | How to let go of the yearning for marriage/ children?Firstly, I do not think you have to let it go, but be really careful not to settle. I definitely want that in my future, but if I don't meet the right guy, that's fine, I'll foster kids and be happy that way. Secondly, I found this peace by addressing why I want that. I definitely blame Disney etc, I want the 'perfect' relationship. You won't figure it out over night, but I find sporadically writing in a journal to be really helpful with this. Good luck and I hope you find the peace you're looki… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 02:20 AM |
| 6 | LMAO Sounds like she's awakeningYeah seriously, how do they think single people live?? We work 40hrs a week but eat good meals and have a clean home! Admittedly I'm a bit forgetful with taking the bin out though... 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/07/20 02:16 AM |
| 5 | Mood: disappointed but not surprisedWhat would you recommend saying here? I'm not someone who's desperate for a relationship (obv, cos FDS) but I also don't do casual dating/Fwb. I find if I'm too vague is sounds like I'm pick meing. I haven't found the right combination of words! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/07/20 10:07 PM |
| 8 | Do any of you gals ever go to r/deadbedrooms and just feel so glad you're single?So so true! Plus they always talk about how amazingly perfect their partner is in every other way. Like seriously depriving your partner and severe lack of communication isn't an issue in non sex related components of the relationship | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/07/20 06:43 PM |
| 16 | Is this a red flag?I see it as a red flag because best case scenario, he needs therapy and has either not gone or made no progress. He wants you to fluff up his ego whilst also lowering your expectations of him. 'I told you I'm bad at buying presents!', 'I told you I'm lazy' etc etc. I wouldn't date someone like this because I look for a partner, not a project. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/07/20 02:50 AM |
| 14 | Are there any older women here who are happily single?This was what I needed to read. I'm 25 and have recently decided to stop looking. If the perfect man appears, lovely, if not, I'm very happy with my life as it is. I get home from work (pre-covid) and after dinner I have a few moments have a few minutes of appreciating how genuinely content I am with my life. It's so weird but such an amazing feeling. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/07/20 11:54 AM |
| 6 | A lesbian who had to learn about men even though she doesn’t date them.The Binding by BR Collins As I say, the first part is really confusing but bear with it because it all makes sense and it's so good! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 03:54 AM |
| 5 | A lesbian who had to learn about men even though she doesn’t date them.Thanks! I was actually super proud of myself. The last guy hasn't given it back because he loved it but didn't have a chance to finish it, then Covid 😂 I feel bad that I had to spoil part of the book but it's genuinely amazing, but you have to sort of accept that the beginning is really confusing. Yeah I have that issue too, I'm doing a physics PhD so there's a lot of men around. We talk about politics a lot though and they do listen and ask questions, so I feel pretty safe with most of them. Ca… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 03:28 AM |
| 4 | The cesspool that is Relationship_AdviceAhaha you definitely win that hand! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 03:18 AM |
| 14 | A lesbian who had to learn about men even though she doesn’t date them.It's ridiculous how often men think that that is acceptable. Although I also have the opposite type of friend, who's always trying to make any tiny issue (like a hard day at work) into a huge issue so he can feel good about himself for helping me 🙄 It sucks, but that's probably the best option. I'd be careful about who you tell that to, secret pick-mes could take issue with that. Also, try to find a way to secretly vet the men that you have less choice about. I found a good one: I found a book t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 03:17 AM |
| 18 | The cesspool that is Relationship_AdviceBest way to communicate with them is serving them divorce papers/restraining orders! Yeah it's scary how toxic people are the loudest! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 03:05 AM |
| 26 | A lesbian who had to learn about men even though she doesn’t date them.Urgh god he sounds absolutely exhausting! That's amazing work from you though! Sounds like you're self worth just leveled up 🍾🍾 you shouldn't have to tell someone that you're fundamentally never going to be interested in them for them to actually respect you as a person rather than a sex doll to fuck. Me too. Sometimes I worry I'm pushing people away by not dealing with their bullshit, and this community is really helpful in reminding me that I don't want those people around me and I deserve bet… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 03:03 AM |
| 81 | The cesspool that is Relationship_AdviceYeah and then they bitch that a lot of advice is to leave? Well a lot of the relationships are abusive! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 02:54 AM |
| 50 | A lesbian who had to learn about men even though she doesn’t date them.Lesbians have to deal with LVM as much as any sexuality that dates them, so of course this sub is for you! That guilt of 'leading a guy on' is so real. I remember the first time a friend really stood up for me after being accused of it, 7 years on. It was a really important day because I realised that fuck them, it's not my fault if the only reason they're talking to me is with the intention of fucking me. That's their issue, not mine. (Obviously safety is more important, but I went to a really … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 02:47 AM |
| 6 | I'm too petty to receive dick pics.Amazing, well done! Often public shaming is the only way! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 02:38 AM |
| 15 | I'm too petty to receive dick pics.It's sexual assault. He has forced you to look at his genitals. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 02:23 AM |
| 9 | I'm too petty to receive dick pics.Good for you! Unsolicited dick picks is sexual assault. Did you go through with send the conversation to his family/friends? Also your baby dick comment was beautiful. I saw someone who pretended to freak out about being sent 'child p*rn' because the dick was small. Seems like a great way to turn the tables on them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 02:21 AM |
| 12 | No one that loves and values you will allow you to self-sacrifice like this...Pretty sure you just stole my story 😂😜 it's crazy how we're taught to want to be so different to 'other girls' but we're all so similar in a lot of ways | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/07/20 12:36 AM |
| 5 | I was a pickme before, but not anymore. This subreddit is helping me be better alone.God he seems annoying. Also racist saying that travellers can't be trusted. (In England at least that's the correct term, no clue else where!) Edit - grammar | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 12:21 AM |
| 5 | Thoughts on this post? Everyone is blaming OP, but all she wanted was to spend more time with him instead of playing video games for hours.Yeah tbf I was probably a little harsh | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 08:52 PM |
| 2 | Thoughts on this post? Everyone is blaming OP, but all she wanted was to spend more time with him instead of playing video games for hours.I think it's a pretty aggressive move to unplug the console. But I wouldn't put up with this. I completely understand the need for alone time and time to decompress after work but she shouldn't be sacrificing herself to his desire to only play video games after work. I'm a little concerned that he didn't think time with her watching a movie or whatever was decompressing enough and he definitely wasn't putting any effort into the relationship. I'd have ditched him long before this happened, but u… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 08:04 PM |
| 5 | UPDATE 3: We've cleared our website application backlog! If you have NOT received an 8 digit code or membership approval - PLEASE READ!Amazing work! I'm just looking to sign up now. What is the URL of the userpage that you're talking about? Is it the desired username or something else? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 07:18 PM |
| 15 | An interesting follow up to my last post where I’m “insensitive” for not letting this douche string me along for week after weekOh yeah god I completely agree. I meant, if he'd actually gone through something. He sounds like a huge wanker though. Weird how FDS has made it so much easier to spot these signs! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 01:24 AM |
| 42 | An interesting follow up to my last post where I’m “insensitive” for not letting this douche string me along for week after weekIf he wanted you to be more understanding, maybe he should have given you more information, so you could understand... Hey at least he identified himself as an LVM and saved you some time and effort! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 01:19 AM |
| 5 | Oh boy, play the cancer card but tell me more about how you’re “always the smartest guy in the room” and how “you’ll give us a chance” 🙄It really is, but honestly I just use it as a test for how a potential date will behave. It's sort of accidental but it's definitely a good way of filtering out wankers! I'm a lot more confident now than I was back then. Now I'd call both of them out fully but I was recovering from a pretty severe mental breakdown so didn't have the confidence/strength to do that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 10:14 PM |
| 1 | Oh boy, play the cancer card but tell me more about how you’re “always the smartest guy in the room” and how “you’ll give us a chance” 🙄Ahaha that's amazing. I can imagine his jaw just flapping because he doesn't know what to say! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 09:48 PM |
| 1 | Oh boy, play the cancer card but tell me more about how you’re “always the smartest guy in the room” and how “you’ll give us a chance” 🙄What did you do?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 09:42 PM |
| 3 | How do I talk myself out of online dating?Seriously this! Took me way too long to figure this out and you wrote it so much more clearly than I ever could! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 09:30 PM |
| 5 | Oh boy, play the cancer card but tell me more about how you’re “always the smartest guy in the room” and how “you’ll give us a chance” 🙄Seriously!! His was a really stupid question as well and I had to find a way to tell him that without being a dick because he's actually a good friend, just doesn't understand enough to know he doesn't understand. I could have done with some help from you last week when I was learning about spin orbit coupling! That sounds so interesting! Yeah that sounds so annoying. Sounds like you dealt with it well though! I actually had a massive issue with an engineer who was mansplaining the physics of my… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 09:13 PM |
| 31 | Oh boy, play the cancer card but tell me more about how you’re “always the smartest guy in the room” and how “you’ll give us a chance” 🙄Yeah seriously!! I had a friend ask me about a Bose Einstein condensate the other day and when I said 'it's when shit gets super cold and becomes another state of matter' he got really sarcastic with me. Like he's going to understand statistical mechanics well enough to understand how the 5th state of matter is different to a solid?! He then asked me about why time isn't invariant and was surprised when he didn't understand the equations. Thank you!! I did my undergrad in essentially theoretical… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 08:50 PM |
| 53 | Oh boy, play the cancer card but tell me more about how you’re “always the smartest guy in the room” and how “you’ll give us a chance” 🙄Seriously!! I'm doing a quantum physics PhD so when I call them on this crap they either suddenly get all excited because they think I'll teach them about the stuff they claim to know about (for free) or they try to put me down because they don't like that I know more about it than them | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 08:42 PM |
| 6 | I hope he picked herYeah it was originally on unpopularopinions but was shared to menwritingwomen and I thought people here would find it as irritating as I did! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 02:33 PM |
| 4 | I hope he picked herLink to the full post: https://www.reddit.com/r/unpopularopinion/comments/hn9oaz/men_have_fragile_egos_because_the_average_woman/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/07/20 02:02 PM |
| 10 | You ladies really have a sista's back! Thank you!So true. I've got a friend who clearly wants more, and there is chemistry. But we want different things from life and because of this community I know not to even consider it because I deserve better than that! So thank you ladies! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/07/20 06:00 PM |
| 3 | Must be under 5’5, fit, submissive, and stepmother to 4.He's looking for a nanny not a bloody partner! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/07/20 07:38 PM |
| 8 | This sub is going to get banned soon. It’s time to leave Reddit ladies.I only joined this sub a few weeks ago and you lovely ladies have helped me so much by reinforcing my beliefs in our worth and allowing me to feel like part of the community. Hopefully it won't happen but if it does, thank you!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/06/20 11:40 PM |
| 22 | Thank You 🙏I had a gross situation when I was a waitress in a hotel restaurant where a lot of business people stayed. A guest who was 25 years my senior left me a note with his phone number and room number saying he'd enjoyed our conversation. I showed it to the guys I worked with, they ran around the hotel with it and showed it to any staff they could and then it was pinned on our staff notice board for about a year. We also put his number into Facebook and found he had a long term partner and 3 children … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/06/20 10:03 PM |
| 2 | Scrote believes men are victims because women sadistically enjoy refusing to have sex with them.This is a man who has never treated women with respect but believes he is entitled to their bodies. He has also watched a few episodes of Criminal Minds and thinks he sounds smart using phrases like 'Sexual Sadist'. His bitterness just leaps off the page. It's hilarious that scrotes like this think we spend so much time thinking about them and their desires! Spoiler alert: we don't give a fuck. We can get attention/sex by literally walking into a bar. If that's all you want, it really doesn't ta… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/06/20 01:11 AM |
| 3 | AS IF! LOOOOOLI'm finally at that point too. Plus 'needing' to nag is also a dumping offense. I'm their partner not their mother! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 01:56 AM |
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