happylittlefaerie Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Curious what women view as "good guys" Kindness, especially to elders, customer service employees, children, and animals. Devoted to their people, whomever that might be. Positive. Understands that health encompasses mental and emotional health as well as physical health, and strives for growth in these areas. Intellectual curiosity (> nuanced understanding > compassionate worldview). No, I would not be interested in settling. Rare, but yes.	/r/PurplePillDebate	02/11/24 09:58 AM
2	Sometimes it's Okay to blame the Victim No survivor loves to rationalize abuse. That’s absurd. In many ways it’s a coping mechanism that the survivor may not even be aware of. We are even conditioned by our abuser to rationalize it. Many survivors of abuse have been accused of being too sensitive, too clingy, too much of everything – this has caused them to excessively look inward for someone to blame rather than seeing the true culprit. The abuser works very hard to implant false insecurities as well as exaggerate existing ones; they…	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/10/24 04:18 PM
8	Sometimes it's Okay to blame the Victim This! I have my own story too, it’s rarely as simple as blame being the impetus for leaving an abusive relationship. My ex blamed me, the police blamed me, I blamed me. Everyone (police, hospital, family, myself) asked the question: why didn’t you leave sooner? Why did he have to put you in the hospital for two days before you left? The abuse was…not enough to overcome my love for him and I saw hints of the old him throughout that I hoped…Until he nearly killed me, and I found out his assault wo…	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/10/24 10:55 AM
4	What's the things you consider a red flag? Red flags are supposed to indicate unhealthy or manipulative behaviors. A lot of these sound like preferences. Getting into fights is the only one that sounds unhealthy.	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/10/24 11:11 AM
3	Normalize saying you have a big vagina instead of "size queen" It is a problem. It’s laughably, embarrassingly uneducated.	/r/PurplePillDebate	18/10/24 09:41 PM
11	Normalize saying you have a big vagina instead of "size queen" He shouldn’t be ridiculed for having a small member, he should be ridiculed for not knowing that during sex if a vagina feels “small and tight” then it is unaroused.	/r/PurplePillDebate	18/10/24 03:54 PM
1	Women, what’s the one quality in a man that instantly makes you interested? I’m having a hard time thinking of one word to describe this but I see this with my partner still and it still makes me 🫦 Whenever he walks into a room, he commands attention. It’s not just confidence, he has that something that draws people in and he’s in his element when he’s sharing stories or delivering a joke with razor sharp precision. His laugh fills up the room. I’m partial to his smile AND the dimples that appear, so there’s that too. He’s such a happy and bubbly person and people want …	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/10/24 10:43 AM
1	Men struggling with OLD need to better curate their profile to the feminine gaze, shitty profiles dont get you likes Silly question…what does OLD stand for?	/r/PurplePillDebate	01/10/24 10:26 PM
6	Do you genuinely believe men have it easier or advocating men’s right is bad? I agree with you OP, I do think men’s rights should be talked about more, in a serious and compassionate manner. In my short time on Reddit, I have seen more often than not that it curates spaces for extremist thought and little room for nuanced thought. Sometimes Reddit feels like an echo chamber. That being said, if we use Reddit as a measuring stick, the opposite sex will likely come up short because of the rampant toxicity found here. I think traditional ideas of masculinity (stoic, strong, …	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/09/24 10:09 AM
1	What advice would you give a man who claims he has "tried everything" Receding hair line? Use it and rock a buzz cut, slicked back look, or taper fade. This link has a list of 29 haircuts that you can try if you have a receding hairline: https://www.styleseat.com/blog/haircuts-receding-hairline/ Take care of your skin! Do you use a moisturizer and antioxidant serum? If you are in your 30s, you really only need to do these two things and apply SPF. What do you mean by dress well? Do you know what looks good on your body type? Try clothes or fits that are outside of…	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/09/24 08:42 PM
2	Women: What do you bring to the table? You are very welcome! I hope it was of some help :)	/r/PurplePillDebate	28/09/24 03:57 PM
14	Women: What do you bring to the table? Girl, I love this. You should be singing your praises! ❤️‍🔥	/r/PurplePillDebate	28/09/24 03:55 PM
4	Women: What do you bring to the table? I am kink friendly, I have a robust sexual appetite, I work and thus I contribute to the household finances, I’m well educated on a variety of topics, I can get ready quickly, and specific to my partner…I am a gamer, bookworm, and a horror movie aficionado and he is as well and we have fun sharing these hobbies together. I am also much younger than him, look younger than my age, and dress well. So honestly? He enjoys showing me off and I enjoy it as well. He also has a stressful job, that does r…	/r/PurplePillDebate	28/09/24 03:44 PM
1	Is being a member of this sub actually improving your life? I came here out of curiosity and my short time here has helped me express myself more succinctly. It has also helped me practice what I preach, that of being kind, even when others are not writing kindly and respectfully. I don’t think I will manage to change anyone’s mind, and vice versa, but it is a good place to sharpen your debate skills.	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/09/24 04:20 PM
0	Why do girls make the biggest deal about getting approached/hit on, even when done respectfully by a guy they find attractive? And? Listing a myriad of potential reasons is more accurate than saying, it’s because I’m ugly! That reasoning reeks of self-pity, self absorption, and refusal to acknowledge the woman in question is her own person with a life of her own and how that plays a big part in the success of a cold approach. But you can’t acknowledge that because then you can’t vilify women as shallow.	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/09/24 02:46 PM
-1	Why do girls make the biggest deal about getting approached/hit on, even when done respectfully by a guy they find attractive? I have never heard of this thought process before. If a man I find unattractive hits on me I don’t assume that I must be unattractive as well. I just assume that…he finds me attractive. And ruin a woman’s day? Not at all. She might be flattered. She might simply be unavailable. If she is bothered or annoyed it’s because she might have had a rough day and just wants to be left alone. She might be with friends. She might be under a lot of stress. She’s a person. There are many reasons why she migh…	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/09/24 02:38 PM
1	Why do women feel upset when their guy friend rejects approaching a girl? What makes a man good looking? From what I have seen in this sub, by the sub’s standards, my partner can’t be good looking. Except he is. And I know I will be unattractive to some, average to others, and pretty to some. That’s fine. I contend that people are not as narrow minded as you make them out to be. There’s no way that I am familiar with that can alert you to whether or not you are attractive to someone unless you try.	/r/PurplePillDebate	25/09/24 03:40 PM
3	Why do women feel upset when their guy friend rejects approaching a girl? I have not experienced this so this is speculation. OP, they are your friends and they care about you. It likely means that they are sad that you don’t put yourself out there because they see your worth. And they want you to see your worth as well. That doesn’t excuse the behavior of course. If you don’t want to approach a woman you don’t have to and you shouldn’t have to defend yourself or appease your friend’s feelings about your decision.	/r/PurplePillDebate	25/09/24 01:43 PM
2	Most of the advice here just tells men to NOT be proactive in finding a girlfriend I care about the lived experiences of men, I have done my best to be respectful in this sub reddit. I said that men should be encouraged to be proactive, I acknowledged that for a number of reasons men feel like they can’t or shouldn’t pursue a woman. I tried to provide some context and acknowledged that it doesn’t change how difficult it is for both sides to navigate. I mentioned in one comment that my DMs are open and I messaged another poster that had asked for help. I am not the person to co…	/r/PurplePillDebate	25/09/24 10:32 AM
2	What advice would you give a man who claims he has "tried everything" Seconding this post!	/r/PurplePillDebate	25/09/24 12:32 AM
7	The “sisterhood” is an echo chamber of narcissism and emotional manipulation. Everyone can be manipulated. Men cannot be controlled or manipulated is a wild blanket statement to make. We see evidence of men controlled by their dislike or hatred of women, their desire for sex, their desire to be attractive, and their fears in this sub. And that’s fine. What’s not fine is pretending that the opposite is true.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/09/24 04:36 PM
1	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men I have already addressed but sure, I can do that again. First, I don’t know how many men struggle with those feelings and attitudes and I certainly didn’t specify that most men do. I also don’t know how many women struggle with those feelings and attitudes but yes of course, women that do are less viable and attractive as partners. I cannot reverse the genders and give you a number, however. My intent was not to say most men struggle with this but rather these qualities are what make a men less …	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/09/24 04:12 PM
–	Modern women want conservative masculine men but who are politically liberal, to go along with their other long list of demands. I love this! My partner is 5’8, loathes lifting, but he runs, and exercises with sit ups and knuckle push ups, and that man’s stomach is hard. He’s also a nerd (written with the utmost fondness, I am one as well), chivalrous, and conservative. He’s not outdoorsy or handy, loves sports,(played them / watching), cooking, and he does make plans for us (but it is not his sole responsibility). It’s almost like people exist on a spectrum regardless of their political leanings.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/09/24 04:06 PM
1	When women tell men "you need to vet better" what are these men realistically supposed to even be doing different? I do agree with you on this. I was asked over and over why I didn’t leave, what I was wearing, and how much I had to drink (it was assumed I had been drinking). I was also told it would be a he said, she said case and that it would be difficult for me but oh yes, they would be happy to help if I pressed charges. I didn’t. I was young, scared, and let myself be talked out of it.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/09/24 11:31 AM
–	What are some of the ways in which we shame each other's dating preferences My partner is much older than I am and I have heard in jest and seriously: that I am a gold digger and that I have daddy issues. It’s not that deep, I love a zaddy 🫦.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/09/24 12:33 AM
–	What are some of the ways in which we shame each other's dating preferences My partner is much older than I am and I have heard in jest and seriously: that I am a gold digger and that I have daddy issues. It’s not that deep, I love a zaddy 🫦	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/09/24 12:33 AM
1	Older men dating younger women: A youngish woman's perspective Oh, that’s my bad! I’m sorry about that. Yes, I agree with that. 100%.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 11:34 PM
3	When women tell men "you need to vet better" what are these men realistically supposed to even be doing different? The “crazy” isn’t always evident though. For a yearish my ex was sweet and loving and if anyone had told me then that he would nearly kill me two years later I would have scoffed at that. If we extend that grace to me, we should extend that grace to men.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 09:27 PM
2	When women tell men "you need to vet better" what are these men realistically supposed to even be doing different? Also, if you want to chat about this I am happy to talk and my DMs are open.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 06:14 PM
3	Most of the advice here just tells men to NOT be proactive in finding a girlfriend Speaking for myself, as a domestic abuse survivor, and as a woman that made the first move with my current partner, I do think that men should be encouraged to be proactive, to befriend and socialize with the hopes and intent of meeting someone. Relationships don’t just happen. I also acknowledge that for a number of reasons men feel like they can’t or shouldn’t pursue a woman. But I disagree with you OP about why these guidelines exist. Just like I am trying to understand your lived experiences…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 04:29 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men I was really torn but now that I know it’s a source of anxiety and oppression for some men I’m going to keep doing what I was already doing 💅🏼	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 04:06 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men Not at all because when I think of a woe is me attitude it’s just that - an attitude, a complaint and can lead to frequent complaining. Suffragettes knew that actionable steps are the foundation of advocacy and lead to genuine, long-term change and modern feminists should and do follow in those steps. If there are woe is me feminists, yeah that’s not attractive or viable either but I don’t think it’s most feminists. Maybe most feminist Redditors? I think feminism is often confused with misandry …	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 03:46 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men But very funny though 😏	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 03:29 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men Boy, you are cooked.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 03:26 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men Of course, a women that has a woe is me attitude is not attractive and viable either. I did not say most men and your most women comment is very telling and reinforces my comment about your low opinion of women. Your comment is not the gotcha you thought it would be.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 03:24 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men In my opinion, what makes a man less viable as a partner is the insecurity, woe is me attitude, me me me attitude (what’s the upside for most men?) and an unwillingness to celebrate women’s gains. These are not behaviors and beliefs indicative of a well adjusted, supportive, confident, and loving partner. When I was getting to know my partner, I wasn’t like, yeah he makes me want to kick my feet up and down and giggle but oh darn can’t get too ahead of myself, have to compare incomes. The attitu…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 03:16 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men I was not talking about the studies and the studies cannot speak for me and I was in fact talking about me.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 02:51 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men Girl, you ate.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 02:38 PM
–	The fight for Equality has become a weapon to sideline most men I don’t care if I make more or less than a man but I do care about a woe is me attitude.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 02:36 PM
1	Older men dating younger women: A youngish woman's perspective That’s fair! I was thinking about non-physical attributes that younger men tend to have and overshadow (for me) the qualities you listed. I like my men with some gray but that does imply they have hair, heh. I have been with a man 55+ and yes, he is fit and that adds to the attraction because he had at me gray, generous, experienced, established, and nerdy. 🤭	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 02:21 PM
2	Older men dating younger women: A youngish woman's perspective What appeal does a younger man have? Genuinely curious.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 02:09 PM
2	Older men dating younger women: A youngish woman's perspective Younger woman that loves older men here. I think there are other considerations we need to keep in mind. Does the older man in question have friends his own age and is he open to dating women his own age? If he is specifically attracted to younger woman, that’s not a red flag in and of itself but it does merit wariness on the younger woman’s part. That’s because the greater the age difference the greater the power imbalance can be. Speaking from experience, these relationships can be navigated a…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/09/24 02:05 PM