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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
176

DISCUSSIONheadlights-/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 01:11 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Well yeah I wouldn’t sleep with a guy again if he couldn’t because there would literally be no point in having sex with someone who doesn’t care about the woman finishing too, would feel like a waste of time. Incompetence in bed is unattractive
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/24 10:23 AM
3

I recently dated a guy who was friends with and spoke to all of his exes, including a recent breakup. I missed so many red flags, including him talking about her all the time and being unsure of his feelings for her. He ended up sleeping with her and turning it around on me, so yeah avoid!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 05:47 PM
5

That makes sense, thank you! I suppose it would happen as you see each other more. He also hasn’t mentioned meeting again, so it probably is breadcrumbing. I wish they could just be honest!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 02:23 PM
4

How do you know the difference between a purposeful slow fade and a natural reduction in texting? I know that it’s not sustainable to text all day for lots of people. I have recently been talking to a guy for about a month and think that he’s fading, he used to text quickly throughout the day, and we would text back and forth for a while in the evening, but now he’ll only send like 2-3 messages. I know that texting all the time is often something that happens more at the start, but I think I’m j…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 01:28 PM
3

True, I would definitely catch feelings, and these type of situations don’t generally progress into relationships. A lot of women seem to take it as a consolation prize, which is a shame as they just end up getting hurt!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 12:41 PM
63

I’ve literally had this said to me before from a guy friend, he suggested having fun and “meeting each other’s needs” until we get into real relationships 🤢 he didn’t understand why I was shocked! We’re no longer friends, unsurprisingly
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 11:07 PM
81

So FWB? Sounds stressful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 07:48 PM
3

This is so true! My ex used to believe that I did things purely to annoy him, and couldn’t understand that it was unintentional. I’ll have a look, thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 12:22 AM
32

I am thank you, I hope you are too! It’s so easy to just accept things like that when there is an element of the truth there, such as being scatterbrained sometimes. I feel like people with ADHD are often infantilised too! I’m glad that people noticed his behaviour for what it was, it’s never ok to speak to someone like that, especially for an accident!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 02:57 PM
130

I also have ADHD and this is how I was treated for years in my previous relationship. I’m so glad that she got out so early!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 01:35 PM
110

🙋‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 12:49 PM
10

Send him a dictionary 🤦‍♀️😂 congratulations on your publication, the trash really took itself out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 12:56 PM
3

It’s the easy way out, but it shoudnt be hard to send a quick message. I’ll definitely be more careful next time, and won’t just believe what I’m told! Apparently most seem to, at least I can call him out if he does 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 07:58 PM
48

My ex knew about the song and thought that it was no big deal, then quickly changed his mind when he discovered that it was sung by women! Apparently it’s fine for men to sing about women’s bodies, but not for them to sing about their own. I don’t love the song, but it’s hardly the worst thing out there!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 01:08 PM
7

How would you respond to ghosting after sex, just let it go or would you call them out?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 10:05 AM
13

The same sort of thing happened to me recently! The communication went from all day every day to minimal, and then he said that he would call and never did. I just left it after that, but it’s such a disrespectful thing to do!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 10:04 AM
4

This is so interesting. I always wondered why I fell for these guys whilst having such a great father, but it makes sense as I’m not good at seeing the red flags. It’s so easy to take people at face value when they put on a performance as you haven’t had to question it before, and so don’t question their facade!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 08:47 AM
3

This is true in my case, I have trouble seeing past pretences and assuming that they mean well!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 08:43 AM
16

My first boyfriend would text random girls that he met whilst with friends and would assure me that it was nothing to be worried about. He also basically went on a double date to ‘support’ his friend who was meeting a girl for the first time. I wanted to be a ‘cool’ girlfriend so didn’t say anything about it! 🤦‍♀️I ended it after he threw a tantrum about me having guy friends, the double standard is crazy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 12:11 PM
2

Thank you, I needed to hear that. I am in therapy after being in an unhealthy relationship so should definitely work on myself before attempting dating again! My ex was also 8 years older, so maybe it’s a bad pattern
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/03/21 09:42 PM
20

That’s great advice, thank you. The constant texting definitely gave me a false sense of intimacy! I’m not planning on reaching out to him again now. He would also ask me lots of questions about myself and I definitely opened up too quickly, I imagine that played a role too. This is great to know for the future- my naivety must have been so obvious to him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 02:54 PM
14

I saw a post on this today! I definitely think that this applies, I suppose I took it as him showing commitment and seeing a future together. His inconsistency is definitely not showing that though!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 02:49 PM
11

Thank you! I think my issue is falling for who they portray themselves to be when I don’t really know them yet. When I get feelings I stop looking at their behaviour critically, so I will keep the guidelines in my head and try to be more critical next time!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 02:35 PM
30

I have been reading about love bombing, which is really interesting and I can definitely see elements of it! My issue is ignoring the signs and just going with my feelings, so I need to set better boundaries. Thank you! ❤️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 01:50 PM
54

They are good points. think the initial intensity was a bit of a red flag too, constant contact, compliments and talking about the future. I feel confused about the whole thing which isn’t a good sign!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 01:31 PM
40

That’s a good point! I feel like it’s pretty obvious to them that I’m insecure, and am probably not in the right mindset to date right now because of it. I’ll check that book out
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 01:24 PM
3

I once had a guy tell me on the first me how he used to control his exes phone, I’m relieved that he wasn’t stupid enough to hide his behaviour! They’re doing us a favour
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 03:29 PM
10

My psychology teacher literally told us that this is the reason why her marriage has lasted so long and advised us (pretty much all women in the class) to date someone who loved us more than we loved them. After being with someone who didn’t really care, I can see why!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 03:23 PM
9

I was once told by a guy I barely know that I was the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen. I know that I’m average looking so it was just ridiculous! They will literally say anything to win us over
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 03:17 PM
21

My ex’s friends should have been the first red flag, he turned out to be just as shitty as they were! They took drugs, saw prostitutes and some were cheaters and abusive to their girlfriends, but he was totally different of course 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/21 12:09 PM
24

I’ve never had one and would never want one, I can’t see how it would benefit me. The guy isn’t going to care, and is just going to use me instead of his hand that night!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/20 10:49 AM
51

This reminds me of my when boyfriend’s friend didn’t believe that I had never had sex with another woman, despite knowing that I’m straight. He assumed that all women have sex with other women, and was offended when I asked him the same. I literally don’t understand their logic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 08:35 AM
6

I found this after a while, he always had excuses for not doing things with me. There was never the time or money to do things together, but he somehow was able to spend most nights at the pub! I don’t know why I put up with it for so long. I was 19 and he 28, so it’s definitely not just an age thing!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/20 10:25 PM
3

I’m only 5”3, so just not shorter than me. I don’t mind if a guy is a bit shorter than average if he’s muscular Muscular, in good shape- not too skinny or chubby Well groomed hair, not long and no huge fringe Not too hairy, beard fine if well kept Well spoken, nice voice Tanned is nice but I’m not too bothered
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 08:33 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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