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hisnameistylerdurtin Archive

View 0 posts and 17 comments by hisnameistylerdurtin on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

You are married until your divorce paperwork is filed and processed by the government. You can be separated but still married. So: Phase 1) married Phase 2) separated ( can not file for divorce until separated for a year) Phase 3) divorced.. and no longer married.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 05:04 PM
1

As far as I know you need to be separated for a year, then you can file for divorce. The 1 year must pass before they even let you try to file for divorce. I think there are circumstances that can shorten that time period like Assault or other violence between the two of you, but i don't remember the specifics. If we talking tax forms you can be separated but not divorced.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/22 08:21 AM
4

Thanks for sharing this. I can relate so much to this. Been separated for almost a year and a half now as she no longer loved me and didn't want to be married anymore and asked me to move out. Have a 7yr old and a 5yr old. I'm 43 and honestly can't remember the last time I cried. . I've been teary eyed a few times but I instinctively hold it all in. .. I bottle it up. It's been so long I don't even know how to let go of it all. .. I don't know how to let loose. So many years of anger and resentm…
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/22 03:29 AM
5

I've been separated from my STBXW for a little more than a year and I'm still realizing how messed up things were, still questioning how little she actually showed love for me. And coming to terms with how I could have been a better husband and to own my part of the marriage and not blame everything on her. If you don't take time to deal with your disfunction you are bound to drag it all into any new relationship you start.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/22 07:05 PM
1

What's Sock Day ?
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/22 02:28 PM
1

I've been doing a lot or reflecting back on our marriage in the last few months. Questioning her love for me and how she chose to show it or not show it. Realizing how little she actually pursued me We had a dead bedroom for some time... even before having kids.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/22 06:22 AM
2

We were in what turned out to be our last counseling sessions back in December and when I asked her if she loved me or was attracted to me anymore she looked me in the eyes and said no.. I sat there a bit stuned. I suspected this was the case but to hear her actually say it still hit me like a truck. Looking back I can tell she felt this way for some time but I had never directly asked her. Took some time for that to really settle in me.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/22 10:49 PM
5

I've been in this sub for a bit and I constantly see guys recommend going to the gym etc. I've been lifting consistently for 12+yrs and have been separated from my STBXW for almost a year now. Going through marriage counseling I figured out I have been depressed for at least 2 yrs specifically related to not being loved and appreciated. I truly can't imagine where I'd be if I wasn't lifting in the gym. I might not be here anymore seeing how bad my headspace got while lifting if that make sense.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/22 10:38 PM
1

She kept giving me percentages. Before we started counseling she said she was 70% sure she wanted a divorce and 30% she was not certain. Before we even started.... Then as we progressed through it, and found the long list of issues we had in our marriage, she just became more sure of divorce. She agreed to go through counseling at the start because she didn't want to quit without even trying to fix things. Because that's the advice she would give a close friend. ... and I think she told herself …
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 11:42 PM
3

My kids are 6 1/2 and 4 1/2 yrs and aren't old enough to understand why Daddy doesn't live at home anymore. Our oldest girl is very attached to me and she still asks me "When are you coming home Daddy??" " I don't want to leave Daddy" ( when I'm tucking her into her bed at night ). Those times just kill me inside. I'm not looking forward to the day when we have to sit our kids down and tell them that Daddy will never be coming home. That Mommy and Daddy are not married any longer...
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 03:56 PM
11

From August to November of last year we were doing marriage counseling and I had been doing everything I could to mend things in our marriage but nothing seemed to matter to her. Nothing I did moved the line at all. Not once did I feel like she gave me a chance. Then in December we had our last serious relationship conversation and she felt like she didn't trust me enough to open up and be honest with me. In our last counseling session she said she wasn't attracted to me anymore ( hearing that c…
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 03:42 PM
1

We have 2 little kids under 7 and things have been going down hill since then and we've been growing more and more apart. Becoming more and more disconnected. Then covid hit and the stress level at her work skyrocketed and that pushed our marriage off the cliff.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 03:31 PM
8

Looking back I remember thinking " oh that will never happen to me.. " and " gee that would suck to get divorced.." and seeing divorced couples portrayed in movies and TV shows and not being able to connect with them thinking my marriage was safe from "that sort of thing"... well I got totally blindsided almost a year ago when she asked me to move out... I never saw it coming. Never even imagined it would ever happen to us.
/r/Divorce_Men05/05/22 02:14 PM
5

I resonate with your post alot. I've got 2 little munchkins, 4 1/2 and 6 1/2. STBXW asked me to move out 11 months ago and one of things that tears me up inside the most has been being away from my kids. Even though I see them a few days a week I feel I have missed so much already. I've been through alot of darkness so far and my kids consistently have been a beacon of light in my life when I struggle to find purpose and hope. The first few months living on my own was especially hard. Now my tim…
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/22 06:50 PM
3

STBXW had her family thing last weekend ( I had no idea intil i saw pics on FB ) and I was supposed to take the kids out to my parents place for Easter dinner yesterday. But then one was sick and the other wasn't showing symptoms yet... not wanting to expose my parent to whatever the kids might have I went myself. .. and that was my Easter.. an oddly quiet dinner with my folks.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/22 12:19 AM
2

I clung onto hope she would have a change of heart or at least give me a real chance ... but I never saw that at all. Looking back it really seemed like she had made up her mind from the start and had no intention of opening up ever again. I know she went through counseling because thats the advice she would give someone else. Even now I have many questions about her actions over the past year but realize I will never get any answers or closure.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/22 03:23 PM
2

Wife initiated separation (i moved out) and ultimately divorce (not final yet). First we did discernment counseling to figure out if we should get divorced, stay together but nothing changes, or start marriage counseling. She agreed to start counseling. Our counselor took us through the Gottman program. After a few months of this we find out that there are issues in pretty much every area. Looking back she was maybe 80% out the door before we even started counseling. Our counselor was really goo…
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/22 01:56 AM
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