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hungry_frenchy Archive

View 1 posts and 138 comments by hungry_frenchy on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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14

hungry_frenchy/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/22 09:55 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Long time ago, I saw a study, saying that people in relationships, experiencing love and sex felt much happier than rich people living alone. And I can understand it. I always had modest needs of money, I am not into consumerism, so I don't benefit the tyniest of being rich.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/22 08:36 AM
1

I agree on the first paragraph, but less on the rest. I still experienced being loved. But I wasn't feeling like it's Disney magical world.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/22 08:32 AM
1

Being rich and alone I would largely prefer the second one
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/22 08:03 AM
4

I can't say I have a physical type and I don't prefer a celebrity over another woman, my neighbor is just as attractive to me as I don't know which actress. I like women, as long as they are not obese or anorexic. I don't care much hair color, I don't care if she puts makeup (but there definitely is too much makeup), I don't care is she shaves daily or twice a month. But I prefer when she has not short hair ( 10cm long is already good for me, a bit longer is even better) I don't care if she dres…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/22 02:26 PM
1

I think the dating market is really absurd, for both genders. Yes, lying to get sex is a common strategy for men, just as is lying about being single or monogamous... But I was never dishonest on my intentions on dating app. Let's be real, I followed the advice to be 100% honest on my intentions with women during a year. Honestly only 3 women were up to meet knowing it would only lead to hook-up/FwB with me... but I actually didn't meet them because they all canceled the dates hours or minutes b…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/22 01:33 PM
1

I was as well constantly horny. But I wasn't as successful as you and always have preferred a relationship over a hookup (I actually don't get why people like ONS. Imo having sex with someone becomes much better when I know them, the chemistry is rarely perfect from the very first time). So I started an antidepressant a few months ago and it changed my life. Since that day, I have absolutely no sex drive. And the impact of this isn't completely clear yet but it is interesting. It has been severa…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/22 09:06 AM
5

Why would you hate a percentage of men that did nothing to hurt you? I am not hating women for rejecting me and not hating men who are successful. Yes there are times in which I wish it would be easier with women. But there is absolutely no hate involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/22 08:40 AM
–

That is the exact reason. 2 years ago a female friend, mid 30s with various life experiences, told me that I had everything a woman could wish for, that I would do a wonderful husband and a great father, that one woman one day will be very lucky to get me... but that I wasn't hot and that it explained my whole struggle with dating and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/22 04:23 PM
–

I am not sure it is entirely true. But I guess as well women have a different definition for casual sex than men, due to stigmatization. But I agree that most women don't look for casual sex as men do. A friend with benefit, sex on a 2nd/3rd date when there isn't a clear relationship potential, holidays relationship, are things some women wouldn't call casual sex (as well because they look for an emotional connection), whereas most men would count it as casual sex. Half of my ex-partners and sev…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/22 10:22 AM
–

Just as feeling safe, living in house/flat, having a family or friends aren't a life need, aka you can survive without them... But who wants to just survive, most people would prefer to thrive.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/22 10:07 AM
–

You can do pretty well in dating by being a normal nice person, that is true. But by being just it? Or we don't have the same definition of being a normal nice person. I was my whole life nice, I have friends, hobbies, a good job. I am not the most normal person ever but I am not a complete outsider. For info, on Photofeeler where anonymous people can rate your pictures, I am between 4 and 6 on the attraction level and above average on the trustworthy and intelligence scale... But my dating life…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/22 10:04 AM
–

The first part of the sentence is very true. The second part was in my case totally false. The pain und suffering during a decade of being single and unwanted isn't disappearing that easy. It was as well part of the reason why I was in a relationship with these women (not because they were my dream partners, but because they wanted me and passed very basic requirements even if they all lived hours away/in other countries)
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/22 09:55 AM
1

Do the calculations using the GSS data. For example 1 man with more than a 100 partners had more sex partners than 100 men with 1 sex partner. You just have to multiply the % of people in each category with the average amount of sex partners of this category to have an estimation.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/22 10:11 AM
4

Say that to the income tax administrations. I lived in various countries where married people paid much less income tax than single people, even when they have no kids (I can understand to pay less taxes when you have kids).
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 06:02 PM
2

I took the data from https://datepsychology.com/how-many-sexual-partners-did-men-and-women-have-in-2021/, which took them from GSS 2021. An interesting read even if I disagree with some conclusions
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 04:08 PM
11

whereas in reality they just get less action, not none. Well I agree with you. But less action can still be 1 time sex over 5 years... a situation I wouldn't wish to any non-asexual person. Another suprising point in this study is that contrarily to what some belief, slightly more women than men are actually having sex with a non committed partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 03:14 PM
31

Actually when you check carefully the GSS data, you see that 6% of the men are having 50% of the sex partners and that more or less 25% of the men have more-or-less less 75% of the sex partners. Close to the 80/20 rules we hear here Warning: this doesn't account only heterosexual men.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/22 02:23 PM
2

Humanity would collapse XD
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/22 03:50 PM
4

I am currently taking an antidepressant for the first time in my life... and for the first time since I am a teenager, I have a really low sex drive (I could still want sex if I was in the right situation but I am not constantly thinking of it as I do normally). The thing is, as a single with a low sex drive, I still would love to have someone in my life but I absolutely don't want to go through the nightmare that is finding this person and seducing her (which is the just marginally less frustra…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/22 12:15 PM
2

I traveled as well. I actually lived and worked in 4 different countries, I speak fluently 3 languages. My career is pretty successful. As for social media, I always disliked them. People bragg too much, show their dream life but not their real life... for me they are quite toxic. Plus many people are behaving really poorly online. For eating healthy and being fit, that is already the case. I will never be muscular or strong but I am doing 3-5 sport sessions a week. And for being sexual... I ack…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/22 08:56 AM
1

Everything I said is true. Then I certainly have various issues, such as a low self esteem, low confidence and a lack of positivity regarding dating, some of these issues coming from the lack of a dating life I have been through. And then, I am not really bragging, aggressive, egoistic, dominant or charismatic. I am as well a bit naive, I rarely know how to flirt. I always was the good guy, helping everyone and I don't have enemies and I don't like to make others feel bad. In the end several wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 04:23 PM
1

And yet, I am not the extra extrovert guy, but I had some extroverted phases... and even when I was introvert, I still wasn't shy: I traveled alone in 4 countries, sleeping in hostels to meet more people, I even lived in a hostel during several weeks when I moved to a new country. I actually lived in various cities and spent 5 years abroad in 3 different countries. I speak 3 languages fluently and there are 2 or 3 in which I have some basic level... And I went to university and worked in various…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 03:52 PM
1

For example, I’ve dated rich men... Yes I can get that. But your dream partner will not be a guy with huge debt living paycheck to paycheck nonetheless. I guess you would prefer a somewhat comfortable financial situation, even if the person isnt rich But I still think that universally, there’s much more diversity in what’s considered a dream partner. I believed the same as you for a long time. And I think it was my biggest mistake regarding dating. This is an extract of a scientific paper I disc…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 03:41 PM
1

You know, until I was 26, I was a virgin. And I couldn't give the name of one woman who had ever wanted me. If I had known any woman wanting me, I would actually would have liked to get the experience even if the woman wasn't my type. And I was not never leaving the house: I went to university, then had a job in a laboratory in which there was more women than men, most of my flatmates were women. A female friend even tried to find me someone once, she lived to be the matchmaker... and she didn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 03:28 PM
1

What do you call solely relies on OLD in order to date? I am a man mid 30s, I was single most of my adult life, I had phases of my life in which I was super social and others in which I was more introverted, I have many friends, men and women... and yet, I just ever dated 2 women I met in real life, both of them I met abroad. I honestly don't expect to get any date from my everyday life anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 03:22 PM
1

Lots of other girls who will find you attractive out there. That is something I personally never saw. Seriously some men are not attractive to most women. Many of my last dates ended in the same way: My dates liked my personality but felt no attraction. I had women even tell me that they wished they would be attracted to me because they weren't used to have similar values and to be treated that well.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 03:11 PM
1

Not really. I can get dates... I just have few of them and they rarely lead to something. So I am on these communities to understand why
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 03:07 PM
1

That is why I ask you, not all women
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 02:44 PM
1

Yes I get that the compatibility may not be there on the personality level. But my point is more global. As you said, your dream partner has not only an attractive personality for you, but he has as well a somewhat attractive situation or a somewhat attractive appearance. And I doubt someone who would be your dream partner not only personality wise but on the appearance and situation level too could be someone else worst nightmare. To go to an extreme, I never heard a woman saying a short, poor,…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 02:43 PM
–

I used dating apps as a man during many years... I tried many things, various pictures, various bios, no bios... and my results are, the impact of the bio varies a lot. I found that I did much better on OKCupid with a long bio. On Bumble, I didn't get much matches with or without a bio... and several of my matches didn't read my bio On Tinder, I had more matches with a bio, but once again, many women apparently didn't read it. On another app only available in my country, I did much much better w…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 11:43 AM
1

Interesting. And what proportion of men are according to you 8+, 6/7, 5 or 5-?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 11:29 AM
1

Do you really believe that your dream partner could be the worst nightmare of another woman ? That she would prefer 90% of the men over the one you think is a top 10%? Because from what I have seen and heard, that was never the case. Some women may not be attracted to the one you call a 10, but they would agree than many men are even less attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 11:27 AM
3

At least for looks that isn't the case. "For each female rater, we computed the correlation between her ratings of the men's attractiveness and the men's actual physical strength (as measured in the original studies, table 1). These correlations were examined to see if any women in our samples showed a significant preference for weaker men. They did not. None of the 160 women in our study who rated attractiveness produced a statistically significant preference for weaker men (all p > 0.05). In o…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/22 11:23 AM
17

I think you have it right. If you put your intentions clearly, many women are suddenly not wanting it anymore, or at least less interested... I saw it several times. Just this year, I was upfront on my dating profile that I just wanted casual. 3 women were interested, we chatted a bit, they were enthusiastic, we planned a meeting... and they never came. But if you are just being flirty, without saying anything on your dating intentions (you don't need to lie), then you go further away.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 07:25 PM
9

"How hard it is" is really people dependent. If you look ugly and you have an unattractive personality, it will be a thousand time more difficult than the other way around. My best friend is always honest with women and never understood why it was so difficult for others... until a few years ago. I gave him my Tinder, I told him he could change whatever he wants, he could match any girl he wants, the goal was to get 1 date... After 3 days he asked me what the problem was because he had just one …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 07:20 PM
13

Not exactly! I didn't have much casual sex and I never lied on my intentions. But everytime I said that I just wanted casual before having sex, I didn't have sex. The women were not really interested anymore And everytime I said it after having sex... well it didn't bother the women. Some became sex friends, other I just saw a couple of time... Honestly, this year I was tired of playing games and I tried during 6 months to be really straightforward. I didn't have a single date that way. And it g…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 07:09 PM
0

Hahaha you are clueless yourself. Many people I know have no real clue about attraction, and quite some of them are in a relationship... some of my colleagues above 30 have absolutely no idea, they didn't even need to understand anything to get a girlfriend. Grooming is quite obvious. But grooming doesn't involve muscles... I learned just recently from a scientific studies that actually all women prefered a physically strong men. Well I am not strong and never was even if I do push-ups/pull-upss…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 06:55 PM
1

Man, I grew up in a small place, I was the only one my age there. There were a few people a few years younger or older but I never had any romantic connections there. The was a girl in high-school with whom it could have worked. But she lived 30-40 minutes away and I had no driving license at that time. Edit: and the second woman with whom I had a chance in highschool... well some of her older male friends thought I was a threat and assaulted me one evening. 3 guys above 20 vs 1 who was 16, by s…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 06:19 PM
1

My parents and family didn't do everything right for sure, especially in socialization. Still I wouldn't call them dysfunctional. They never studied, always lived on the deep countryside, were wed at 22, were state-employee, never went abroad... and they somehow managed to get somewhat successful children. But it is true that the life environment in which they grew in did not exist anymore, and that the values they taught us are greatly outdated.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 01:21 PM
1

In which way?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 01:01 PM
5

Everything about the red pill that works is mainstream knowledge outside the red pill. Is it? Because I grew up in an environment telling me to be myself, to be a good guy and that love would just happen along the way. It didn't happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/22 05:14 AM
3

Why are you so aggressive? I tell what imo could change something in men body's perception and your reaction is that it is the fault of men. Your generalization brings nothing... not all men behave or think as you describe. And once again, it is not only about fucking but about feeling desired.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 04:52 PM
3

Yes we all did (except maybe one guy, he maybe did but I have no contact with him since years and at that time he didn't). Most people meet someone if you take life as a scale. But some did a depression and went through very dark phases before meeting their girlfriend. A guy I know attempted suicide at 25 and spent a few months in a psychiatric hospital, mostly because he never had a girlfriend and had been badly rejected/humiliated in public some times... And not all the relationships were happ…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 04:31 PM
2

Come on, messages on men getting no compliments, feeling invisible/undesirable to women are widespread. Honestly the first time I felt desirable to one woman, I was 26 years old. I am 34 now, and I still have never been complimented or asked out by a woman (but I have been by a gay man lately). Imo, we could agree that we should find a solution to make sex more easily accessible to men, without forcing women to have sex with them. One thing could be working in the media on the image of men (and …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 04:23 PM
2

I really only have one male friend I've had for a while who's been single for the entire time I've known him (that I can think of atm at least), and he's indifferent to dating atm and isn't trying at all. As a guy who has been in this situation, you cannot mentally be continuously trying to find a girlfriend over years. Don't forget that failing continuously is having quite a big mental impact, and that looking for a girlfriend is a huge energy expense (when I am looking for a girlfriend, I am g…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 04:06 PM
3

How many friends is many friends? Because if many friends is a 3-10 good friends and 20-30 "hobbies/parties" friends, I was in this situation until I was 26 or 27 (depending on what you call a girlfriend). And among the guys who studied with me, there were quite some guys fitting your criteria who didn't have a girlfriend before they were 23-25.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 04:01 PM
3

Sex is only one part of the issue. Feeling wanted is the other one. And no amount of masturbation will make me feel wanted. (Plus honestly, orgasm is not the best thing about sex. I enjoy the foreplay, seeing and hearing my partner, I enjoy the cuddles afterwards...)
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 03:49 PM
3

Just as an insight. I am a man and didn't have much success in dating. Dating actually wasn't important for me before I was well in my 20s. But it is actually having more a d more people around me speaking about dating, love, sex, which made me feel like more and more of an outcast. I met cool girls at that time, but they just wanted to be friends, nothing more. It started to be tough when I became 24-25 without any experience. I could relate less and less to others and I start feeling really ba…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 03:46 PM
1

I am a man and I don't get it. For me it was just a stupid kind of harassment since I believe it was probably always failing. But I discuted with a few female friends and one said that if she is horny at that moment, she may react by sexting or meeting the guy. Which may explain that some guys continue to do it. A date once told me too that her male friends are frequently sending nudes or asking for some and that it wasn't bothering her. And a good looking male friend regularly receives unsolici…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 11:53 AM
1

Man, I was seeing a therapist at the time. So yes he didn't say I was cured right after I met my ex gf. It took time to validate it. And no one ever credited her for ending my depression. The change of situation and self esteem of having a girlfriend did it. And I had to add that I had no other issue beside it. I was healthy, had a good job and great friends
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 11:11 AM
1

It's not like having a gf or bf cures depression. You just have no clue. Having my first girlfriend at 26 was the biggest change in my mood and confidence in my whole life. The effects lived much longer than the relationship (which lasted only 3 months) and it did indeed cure my depression (which was partly linked to the fact I never had a relationship). In average, people having sex from time to time are much happier than people who don't have sex. The amount of money needed for someone having …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 10:50 AM
8

What you say is true up to a point. work on everything else and trust me you will be fine. Also, life is unfair, deal with it. That is where I disagree. It won't necessarily be fine. Luck is important in dating. And you can't control it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 10:37 AM
2

I think as well that what many don't see is the luck factor. Many people think that their success are due to them, that their failures are due to others. But the truth is that dating for many men is the result of an action with a low success rate but with important consequences. And confidence, a quality increasing a man's odds in dating is higher after a success and lower after a set of failures. But who knows what would have happened if someone's first partner had decided not to date them, or …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/22 10:14 AM
1

And it says as well that men's profile are not inherently worse than women's profile
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 12:25 PM
6

I think you have it wrong. Personality is attractive, yes, important for long term relationship, yes... but only if you are attractive enough. I studied in a good university, have a good job (even if people don't find it interesting), I cook well, I play music... Let me tell you none of this seem to matter much in dating because women don't find me hot. My best friend looks good, he doesn't play music and doesn't cook much... and he never had issue to get a hook-up or a girlfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 12:15 PM
10

what convinced you that redpill ideas are valid? I grew up as a very reasonable, nice, romantic and caring guy. I never got into trouble, I had great academic achievements and I had many friends, guys and girls. I followed what people around me said, to just be yourself and patient, to not be aggressive or sexual with women... but I never was the guy they chose. The way I got my first girlfriend at 26 was to do the opposite of what I have been told to do. When I was 30, I started to get more hon…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/22 10:58 AM
2

I experienced something similar and could state as well that it is easier to date in a country in which your nationality is fancy or well seen. In my own country, I have huge troubles to get a date. In some other countries, just as rich as mine, some people have stars in their eyes when they hear where I am coming from. And as for status symbol, it is true as well for poorer people in my country, which isn't poor at all. Quite some poor people try to stand out, either with fancy looking or loud …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 03:18 PM
6

Women approach this from love side, but can't fathom love without sex. And men approach it from sex side, but really seeking love. As a former late virgin myself, involuntarily celibate, I couldn't agree more. I wanted sex, yes, but not in a context in which I wasn't wanted, desired. Sex work was not appealing me at all, because I would not have felt wanted.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 03:05 PM
1

Well, I partly disagree on one thing. 10 years ago, there were plenty of forums about dating, PUA and men having some troubles with dating already.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 10:26 AM
2

There are many truths in what you are saying. But I think there are other things at play. I never had much success on dating apps but in the last 2 years, the only 2 women who wanted something with me were 10 years younger than me and wanted only something casual. All my friends, men and women, tell me I would be the perfect father and husband, but women around my age have absolutely no interest in me. One of my friends, a woman who is 30, complained that often good guys on dating app have no co…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 09:51 AM
2

That is exactly that, and for both genders. I was at a music festival and a woman approached a friend (the only friend I have that is approached by women). They talked 2 min and she directly told him he is cool and ask him where he is sleeping. My friend said he has a girlfriend and therefore is not interested but that he has single friends at the festival and asked her if she wants to be introduced to them. Her answer was "No thanks, I will just open Tinder and find someone quickly enough"
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/22 08:39 AM
1

You have just no idea. It is OK, you didn't experienced it. But you shouldn't judge people. You know that even babies will choose a warm body over food? The only thing you have right is that it is an emotional hole. There are different strategies to cope with it. And I did well for years... until I broke down mentally and went to therapy. Unwanted life situations such as celibacy may lead to depression, loss of life purpose, anxiety, stress, immunity issues and suicidal thoughts... in addition t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 11:06 PM
1

I don't think it would be that difficult, and I think people would give money... or worst case, you make them pay a fee when they register and you reimburse them if they don't find love. The difficult part is to make people find the good partner
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 09:27 PM
1

Wow, I don't know what you take but it is powerful. Are you comparing sex to cheap fast food? If that is the case, I really pity your partners ;) I was sexless most of my adult life. I am not especially worshipping women, I am not watching porn, and I don't get your reference to Onlyfan. The thing which is hurting is not only not having sex, but being touch starved and feeling unwanted/undesirable.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 09:25 PM
1

But the business is not thesingle person anymore... but the ones you paired up. Just send them a reminder that they meet on the app after 1 month, 3 months, a year... and ask them kindly to give you a bit of money for it. How much money would you give if you found the perfect partner? I would give much more than for useless superlikes, boosts or premium features
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 09:16 PM
1

Women don't want the whole bangmaid mother to a man deal. They want a loving partner and a man who can step up and meet needs and not the alpha male man child who can lift some weights at the gym. Since financially the world is becoming 50/50, money isn't it but a man who will do dishes and fold laundry? Yes. A man who listens when you have a problem and instead of gaslighting or dismisses actually listens and is an active participant in the relationship yes. You know, 2 years ago a good friend …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 09:13 PM
1

Who the hell cares if sex rates are down? Unless your personal sex rate is in question (male only) then other than you fixing yourself to more match whatever women claim to want these days, it’s meaningless. Who cares if people in the society you are living in are becoming unhappier, more frustrated? Yes for many people, having sex more or less frequently is increasing their happiness. People having frequently sex are as happy as sexless people who win a lot more money.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:38 PM
1

If those apps were good at getting people paired up(and they certainly could be if they gave two fucks about it) then they’d be out of business. I disagree! Imagine one dating app which would find quicky good partners to their members. This app would take rapidly 50% of the market because every people looking for a relationship would flock to it (women first... and when there are women, men just pay to enter). The thing is, it is absolutely difficult to say who would be a good partner. And yes, …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:25 PM
1

I agree with many of the things you say except your last sentence. I don't think many men with a normal sex drive who don't have sex are not having sex per choice or just because of their standards regarding women's hotness... Really I was in this situation, I would have slept with almost any women who would have wanted me. Weight, face, disabilities... nothing of these really mattered.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/22 08:14 PM
1

I know one of my fwb had a somewhat high body count and that didn't disturb me. I could have entered in a relationship with her if we both didn't have planed to move to different continents. But she was very honest so I could trust her. On the other hand, my other fwb and one of my girlfriends lied about their sexual past and body count and that is a somewhat orange flag for me. And I turned off one woman due to her body count because she made me really insecure and frustrated with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 03:22 PM
1

You're not a victim of other people's judgement. It only has as much power as you give it. That is the way I tried to grow up with. And it destroyed me. No it is not ok to be judged by society for who you are. Tell the same sentence to a racial or sexual minority, you will here how well they liked it and what impact it had on them
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 01:29 PM
1

I am maybe stupid but I still don't see the generalization about porn and incels. I was an incel, I never watched much porn. Of course porn gives extremely biased referenced on sex. But I don't see the link between this story and a potentially teenage virgin guy penetrating raw his girlfriend when she told him she didn't want to. And for the other redditor... I don't see what his views have to do with porn, or being an incel (per definition, an incel would not be in this situation in the first p…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 01:21 PM
5

There is some truth in it. I grew up in a catholic environment. That was one if the major reason why I wasn't able to get a girlfriend before I was 26. Sex is bad, you should only date someone for mariage, you are a sinner...
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 11:48 AM
1

Hahahaha wow! Who was needing a therapy?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 11:41 AM
1

What has this situation to do with incel... please! It is a rape, but involuntarily celibacy has nothing to do with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/22 11:37 AM
10

I think you have it wrong at least for some incels A lot of times these incels are unattractive inside and out, but still demand a woman to have sex and be in a relationship with them. They have low standards for themselves, but have ridiculously high standards for women. Majority of the time, the women they want don’t even want them. Why would an attractive woman with self worth would want a man who puts no effort in himself? I have been involuntarily celibate during most of my adult life. Yet …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 05:00 PM
3

I am a man, myself educated and somewhat intelligent... and not that good looking. I find intelligence attractive and being dumb incredibly repulsive. And even more for a meaningful relationship. I would a 1000 times prefer an intelligent 4 to a dumb 7 or more. And most of the woman I dated had a master's degree and I found them pretty even if they were not steeming hot. But that being said, I am invisible to most women too.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 04:37 PM
1

One woman told me that she just wanted hookup or Fwb with men who were open for more, because "who knows if we really match". But she was not looking for a long term relationship on the platform, she just wanted to keep the possibility open. And all my 3 Fwb were swiping left on every profiles mentioning something casual on OLD. It wasn't that they were against anything casual, but it had to happen "spontaneously", without expectation of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 11:49 AM
1

I lived most of my life in small cities and worked male dominated fields and I struggled. But the years I was in a major city or surrounded by women, I still was struggling. I remember celebrating my birthday with 80% of women, I still didn't date any of them. The only time I wasn't struggling was the year I went back to university at 28. I was standing out: older and richer than most other guys there and way more confident than when I was at university when I was young... It was the only time i…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 11:00 AM
1

I would not advise to lie about intentions but OP is somewhat right Women who are open to hookups and fwb won’t be scared off by you being honest about that. My experience is the exact contrary. I don't pursue women who tell they just want a relationship and I just had once sex with a woman who was fully up to casual and interested in me when I told her before having sex that I am just open to casual. I met other women who were up to it and with whom intentions were clear but we never had sex. T…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 08:11 AM
1

I think lying on your intentions is especially bad. But let's face the truth: If you’re honest you can still have sex: maybe not with her. But some woman will be open to having a casual relationship with you without you lying. I am 34 and I spend most of my life single and I was open to casual everytime I was single. In all those years, I frequently told my intentions when Iwas just interested in sex while chatting with the woman and it just worked once. A few other women said they were up to it…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/22 08:00 AM
1

For me, I would say that I find approximately every second woman my age physically attractive. Not necessarily hot, sexy or super pretty. But attractive enough for me. And I am not thinking I am an exception
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 04:55 PM
1

Then ask yourself the question: when you go out, when you go to the supermarket or to the office. How many men your age you see and how many you find physically attractive? I asked a few friends and I read polls about it. The numbers were awfully low.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 04:35 PM
1

Seriously, did you ever ask your friends the ratio of men their age they find physically attractive... when a woman says more than 10%, it is shocking. As a man, I cannot tell you how many time I met a woman who liked me as a person, who was open to dating, but who had no attraction to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 04:26 PM
1

You are a funny one. I am training since years and I am eating like a pig. Yet I am still very slim with not much muscles. Not every man has the genetics to get big muscles. And you can't change that by surgery.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 04:20 PM
2

This is the worst advice ever. It is meaning well but ut isn't exactly true. Yes everyone can eventually find someone even if you are underweight or overweight... but it is way easier for men if they are healthy and fit/strong. I shared your opinion during a long time. I was a tall skinny guy, doing endurance sports. I was happy with my body. I actually disliked the gym and it was extremely difficult for me to get muscles. I believed that intelligence and humor could compete with muscles... haha…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 04:12 PM
1

an average-looking guy of reasonable height and weight can get laid if he can keep all of his other traits hovering around average. I 100% agree. But he may need years to get laid. If a man is medium in look (aka slightly overweight and not especially good looking, without style), if he is medium interesting/boring and medium funny, medium charismatic, medium social and medium on the mental health balance... he won't get laid easily. Average is a convenient word, but no one is average. Yet a cer…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 03:54 PM
3

True. But honestly it stays very rare. I have never been asked out in my life and I am a man in my 30s. Actually, I just have seen 2 men ever been asked out.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 03:42 PM
1

It is true. But as a man, it is extremely rare that I think a woman is unattractive because she has too much or not enough boobs...
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 03:31 PM
2

True up to a certain point. Everyone can be somewhat attractive to someone. Not everyone can be super hot to someone. An obese or an underweight guy will have a more difficult time to find a partner than if he had a bmi of 23. Honestly, I am a man in my 30s... I don't know if I met one woman a year who found me attractive, and women who found me hot were super rare, even my girlfriends were not seeing me that way... and I am relatively tall with a normal weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 03:29 PM
1

Also men can raise their requirements for a relationship at any point in time but most men choose not to. This is not always true. Or yes, you can raise your requirements, but good luck then. Already without much requirements, I am not flooded with women’s attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 03:20 PM
2

You have no idea man. Even when you look for a relationship and are desperate and have no threshold, it isn't easy... believe me I went through it and I am not a 1/10 looks wise: I could not even name one woman who was into me during many years of my life. And for the record. A friend of mine is a woman who has many qualities but being pretty or having a nice body are not parts of them. She is still the one picking her partners and boyfriends... not the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 03:11 PM
4

I heard this again and again. Many guys are frustrated assholes, no one can deny it... But as a guy who never said anything degrading to anyone, I can tell you that I don't get dates out of my normal conversations either. For sexual messages, I don't know. I rarely sent them and never early in a conversation but I was surprised by how well some women reacted to this type of messages. After discussing with friends, men and women, some women are at least sometimes being interested in them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 02:59 PM
10

I disagree somewhat. I created an empty woman account just to see if men's profiles were as bad as I heard. I always swiped no on guys... but I was surprised. Most guys' pictures were at least ok. The bio were not always amazing but I had few walking red flags. That explained why it was that difficult for me. I put effort in my profile, selected good pictures but I never was handsome... and in that environments, I can't compete
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/22 02:52 PM
1

you lie to them No I lied once. Then I didn't need to. And I am no fan of ghosting or one night stands. I stayed 3 months with that girl and I still hold her dearly in my heart for all the good things she brought in my life. And that is my whole point. I am an honest person, I hate lying, I hate bragging. This is not my personality. And I believed for a long time in the "be yourself, the right person will come for you in time". But that isn't true. The old virgin man is not a fantasy for women. …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/22 06:20 AM
1

Maybe he did it but didn't find the right person. Or maybe he focused on a career. I am looking for the person to start a family with since ... always. I am 34 and never found her.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 02:42 PM
1

By telling it in the long conversation with a match
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 12:29 PM
1

Confidence never was being able to talk to women. That I always did, I always had plenty of women as friends. Making friends never was my issue. But I had no confidence than one of them wanted anything romantic or sexual with me. Because I had been rejected enough times before, that no woman was ever flirtarious with me and I never had any woman expressing any sexual or romantic interest at me. What I meant by pretending I was experienced and confident was pretending to be sexually experienced a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 09:35 AM
2

What you don't need to do is start trying to fit into a mould of the perfect man by societies standards. I partly agree... but just partly. You don't need to be the cliché perfect man by society standards. But good luck if you are too far from the standards of society and the most common expectations women are having regarding relationship, you could be as yourself as you want, you will be lucky to find a woman who would have interest in you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/22 06:05 AM
11

I not a fan of pity-party either. But your sentence is easier to accept for the people who lives in a confortable situation. When you are in the lowest strata, it is way more difficult. I had my first kiss and first girlfriend at 26. Before that, I had a hard time with my self esteem. Don't forget that every movie, every second song and every second conversation with friends are about things you never experienced, you try to experience them but failed everytime. People are making fun of you and …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 01:55 PM
2

And generally speaking, most women are turned off by guys who try to be something they are not, trying to mould themselves to some perceived standard that isn't them If you knew! I was myself my whole youth, a shy guy, respectful, nice with everyone... but a virgin without experience. I was the kind of guy who didn't give a fuck about social standards, I had my values and was proud of them. But I never had any romantic or sexual interest coming from women. I am a very passive guy, I am no leader…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/22 01:45 PM
1

Agree! I never was charismatic. I had periods of my life in which I was funny, had many friends and was having good social skills. But I absolutely never have been charismatic. That is fully different.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/22 11:30 AM
4

The same for me. Dating apps are a nightmare! But I never dated someone I met through friends, and just one person I met at an university activity.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/22 06:57 AM
1

I lived with a lesbian and our experience was pretty different. None of us had sex at that time. She told me that life would be better for both of us if we moved in another city with easier girls.if such a city exists, I didn't find it
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 02:35 PM
1

I think I was tested more than I had unprotected piv...
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 02:30 PM
1

You can date someone without thinking he/she is the hottest person on earth. It doesn't mean you don't like/love them. But if your point is that looks is irrelevant in dating, I would gladly emigrate to your planet, because it okays a large role in my world and it makes my dating life way more complicated than it could be
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 02:13 PM
1

I did the same on Tinder. A friend was complaining that the guys on Tinder were awful, like having just a bathroom selfie and no bio. So I created an account to check. Well 1/3 of the profiles were bad, and some of them really really bad, that is true. But I was surprised by the amount of ok and good profiles. Many had bio, they were not always amazing but not as bad as I expected. The same for the pictures. If I was using for men the criteria to swipe right that I used for women, I would have s…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 02:02 PM
1

It happens when there is 10 hot guys for 1 hot girl on a platform. The gender ration isn't 1 to 1
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 01:43 PM
1

98% of people (US) have dates, relationships, sex, and often marriage throughout their lives. Most of these begin with pure physical attraction I wonder what is the source of your 2nd sentence. Similarly dudes who think they are '2's here, are someone's '8' or even '10'. They just don't know it. Well, most men/women prefer the same kind of people from the other sex. It doesn't mean men/women commonly unattractive will never find someone. But it is exaggerated to say that some people will see you…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/22 01:30 PM
1

That is exactly the thing. I was at a music festival with a group of friends. A cute woman approached one of us as we were about to leave. She told him she needed a guy to get home with her. My friend said he was already taken but said that 3 of his friends were single and would gladly get homewith her. He showed them and her answer was, "no thanks, I will find someone on Tinder then!"
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 02:08 PM
1

I disagree on this. I tried my while yourh to not put sex first and never managed to interest a single woman except for friendships. I started having romantic success when I started trying to fuck women.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 01:52 PM
2

Well, is getting a 6 rolling a dice luck? Yes, especially if you absolutely need a 6 at that exact time. If the "after a certain amount of time" had no effect on the person waiting this amount of time I would agree. But the life experience of the person who has a consistent and relatively fulfilling dating life or relationship since he/she is 17 is absolutely different from the one of the person who never experienced anything romantical at 25, at 30 or at 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 11:55 AM
2

I think you didn't get the definition right. Not all nice guys are entitled, calling women sluts for being rejected or looking for a virgin woman. Some are just good guys, respectful, but thinking that they have to be nice in social situations and with women. They are not assertive or flirty, not pushy and can't enforce their boundaries. I guess being a nice guy comes from education. Boys growing up in an environment where dating, sex, superficiality are shameful and where mariage was the sole m…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 09:21 AM
7

Well have you been involuntarily celibate? I have been. Yes lack of sex is one important point. But sex isn't exactly what most man who is involuntarily celibate is looking for. I was looking for validation: being desirable, wanted, loved for who I am. And in that context, having sex with a woman who wanted me was just one major form of validation. I really thought about paying for sex. And I realized that it would not bring me anything. Yes I would not have been a virgin anymore... but being a …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 01:05 PM
1

What you say is mostly true. But from my own experience, a lack of relationships and the fact I am not feeling desired by women is having major effects in my depression. So would your mental life still be healthy if you couldn't have sex but wanted it? I am not sure of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 11:45 AM
1

Well, monks used plants which were known to reduce desire
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 11:42 AM
0

That is actually wrong. Their was a study made on daughters and their mothers. The mothers had to choose the best partner for their daughters among 3 men based on pictures of the men and positive/negative adjectives about the personality. In each set of 3 men, a man was above average in look, one was average and one was under average. There was not a single time in which an under average man was chosen, even when he had the most desirable personality
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 11:35 AM
1

If that were the only 2 reasons, I would never have problems with women. Obviously something is missing
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 11:23 AM
12

standards are the reason 99% of incels are incels. A lay is only a short drive and 100-200 bucks away for most people. That is the most absurd thing I ever heard. Just as saying as they are not incel because they could have sex if they were gay. That is not due to standards. Sex with a hooker is not what these men are looking for. And I understand them. But that doesn't mean that they are not involuntarily celibates. That is the same as saying standards are the only reason a woman can't find a r…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/22 10:46 AM
3

I think the proportion of men who have never been asked out is far greater than the proportion of women who have never been asked out. I am 33, I have never been asked out. Last time I discussed it in my friends group, only one of us has been asked out by women... but he is asked out fairly frequently.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/22 10:25 AM
2

https://theblog.okcupid.com/a-womans-advantage-82d5074dde2d Same website says it doesn't balance out. Men send 3 to 4 times more messages than women. Both sex send messages to people more attractive than they are but women have more chance to turn a message into a conversation. Plus the original study was done 13 years ago... at a time where swiping was not prevalent. I am pretty sure an updated study would give different results.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/22 07:49 AM
11

This is such a cliché. I don't watch porn, don't play video games and still struggle with dates and women. On the other hand, I know plenty of men who watch porn and play video games who are in a relationship or don't struggle with women
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/22 09:07 AM
1

I don't get your answer to my comment. Plus being a man who isn't like the men you describe, I think you generalize a lot
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:48 PM
1

Just as a remark. You need to get at least a woman to be a loving partner or a dad. So according to your own reflexion, how would a man build self worth through a fulfilling relationship or being a father if he can't get at least one woman in the 1st place?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:37 PM
1

You are not wrong. But the amount of time you need to be around to be there at the right time can be years or decades. And unfortunately, after a few years without success, you have extra challenges to overcome because you will likely not be that confident in your sex-appeal anymore. I have several friends, men and women, I had very social years, between music festival, pubs, sports, various activities... I just had two dates starting from being around... in 10 years as a single adult
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:11 PM
7

It took me years to understand that there is just no way to emulate that. My best friend is the kind of guy I would like to be, regarding women. Many women just find him hot and flirt with him: he is tall, dark hair and has apparently a good looking face... and that is enough, he does no do sport, put no make up and buy his clothes in basic shops... I just can't compete... I spent the last years going to the gym, I had a skin care routine, bought better clothes... I still hardly had 2 first date…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 12:39 PM
2

There are a few basic things that women want to see in a man: ... If that was really what women wanted from men, I would have had a huge success with women, because I am doing all of it. Yet, I have far from a successful dating life. You are right that some women want these qualities, but other criteria come far before them... I have seen who my female friends dated, physical attraction was 99% of the time a major criteria.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 12:14 PM
4

the reason why you're more appealing to women when in a relationship is because when you interact with these women, you're not hitting on them. you're treating them like a normal person. that's it. that's the magic. Let me disagree. I am a man and I had a whole lot of platonic female friends. I never hit on any of them, I treated them like my male friends actually. Yet, I never had any one of them hitting on me or showing any interest regarding dating/romance/sex. We are speaking about hundreds …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 12:04 PM
1

Most of the men here don’t like women’s brains very much, in contrast to their bodies Isn't it not only relevant to men here, but to people of any gender and everywhere ? I say this as a man speaking 3 languages, having 2 university diploma and a successful career in research. I cannot say that my brain was very valued by women (or by men), especially with regard to dating/relationship/sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 11:47 AM
1

This post such a joke. I guess I find 60% of the women between 25 and 40 physically attractive, and probably 75% of the younger women. I am in Europe, so we have less overweight people, but I dated overweight women and I am as thin as a straw. Ask men below 40 with whom they would sleep with if they could. Most single men would accept to sleep with 75% of the women below 40. Ask women below 40 the same question, most single women would be up to sleep with less than 5% of the men below 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 01:08 PM
1

I agree with you message but just yo say one thing. My SO for example gets harassed a lot. We couldn’t even run a festival booth without women and girls (and some men) being literally all over him. And he doesn’t even work out or look like a model or anything. He just looks kind and like he probably won’t hit you for harassing him. Your SO is probably pretty good looking and charismatic. I have plenty of male friends, all of them are kind and not the kind of violent guys. Only one of them get hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 12:55 PM
1

So you would start a relationship with someone you are not physically attracted to and for whom you have no desire? That is the whole point, being hot and being attractive are not the same thing. I think 5% of the women are hot, but a good 70% are physically attractive to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/22 12:07 PM
1

My best friend is super hot according to many female friends. He is a great guy and my best friend, but I and the other guys of the group rarely had a chance with women when he was around... As you say, it can be really flirty to the point you think you will not go home alone that night... and suddenly my friend arrives, the switch turns off, the woman is not interested in me anymore
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 03:43 PM
0

You have to admit that Men need to adjust to what women want And We are all different Are somewhat contradictory. How do you want men to adjust to unclear criteria which varies from person to person? I am a pretty communicative guy and I am flexible on many things. But I don't read minds! And most women (and most people actually) don't give feedbacks or say what they want or how.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 03:09 PM
1

4h is a ahort time frame but honestly, on Tinder and Bumble, I always received more likes on the 2 first days than on the following 2 months due to the new user boost.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 02:35 PM
1

Well, from this study, the experiences from average men and average women on dating apps are pretty different
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 02:27 PM
1

I don't say that the previous message was true or false. Life is economically speaking much better now than it was in the past. But an economically better life doesn't mean a better life. Men need to adjust to what women want, not like it was before where they could just simply take advantage of women. That is true. But the big issue is to understand what women exactly want, because there is frequently a huge discrepancy between what they say they want and what they really want
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 01:46 PM
2

Economically? Probably. But on the social level, the integration of everyone into a society or community... not exactly. To come back on dating/relationship... people, and especially men, are in average happier when having sex at least once a week or being in a relationship than without sex or relationship... on the contrary, money doesn't really make people happier.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/22 12:53 PM
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