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i_am_j_o_b Archive

View 6 posts and 46 comments by i_am_j_o_b on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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4

Bro you gotta fix your mindset first. Just by this post you’re overthinking this way too much and you have outcome dependence. Online dating is a cesspit. You have hoes looking for validation with no intention of meeting up, women who just plain suck and have no personality, women who are time bandits etc, etc. You’ll have different experiences and a cookie cutter approach won’t get you far. Relax, have the girl qualify herself to you for being worth your time, and if they’re cool suggest a meet…
/r/askTRP27/05/21 06:54 PM
7

I have an ex that I broke up with in 2006, and she still to this day hits me up once a year on my birthday so say, “Happy Birthday.” I have another ex that took our dog when we broke up and she knows that’s a sore spot; and if she stalks my Instagram stories and sees me with another woman will text me pics of the dog to try and elicit a reaction. Another ex is still friends with some people that are my acquaintances. I don’t see them often; but the last time I did they said she told them I was h…
/r/askTRP27/05/21 06:46 PM
4

Excellent points. Honestly, I’ve done a lot of work on myself and improved my SMV, and since then things that used to bother me don’t anymore. The one thing i can key on is avoiding eye contact. I’m not looking to make friends when out and eye contact is something subconsciously I only give when I’m interested
/r/askTRP26/05/21 07:21 AM
9

That’s funny as fuck.
/r/askTRP26/05/21 03:53 AM
16

We don’t? Shit after I order a drink and before I take a sip I’ve been doing it wrong.
/r/askTRP26/05/21 03:24 AM
17

Exactly this for me as well. The more in shape I get, the more someone wants to take me down a peg. A buddy of mine went from overweight to jacked, and is a semi pro fighter and he said the same thing.
/r/askTRP26/05/21 01:52 AM
41

Good point, and being the star of my movie I internalized this as something I was doing to bring it on. It’s the environment and it’s what guys do, rather me being personally targeted.
/r/askTRP25/05/21 10:53 PM
62

Oh, I totally get that. When I was in my early twenties I was the same way, but now it’s not even worth it to me. Anything negative from someone I don’t give a shit about isn’t worth my effort or emotion to react. Still though, really don’t get why some guys do this
/r/askTRP25/05/21 10:50 PM
5

Shit I’ve been doing it wrong
/r/askTRP25/05/21 07:47 PM
3

You said it in your post, you got oneitis after that second date. She sensed that and pulled back majorly. So how did those two dates go? You said you escalated but did you close? Unless you got a firm no, you didn’t escalate enough and she figured you weren’t interested or you put yourself in the friend zone. Since then you hit her up waaay too much. A good rule of thumb to gauge interest is if someone can’t meet up but actually wants to, they will reschedule. If they don’t, cut your losses and…
/r/askTRP19/05/21 09:10 PM
8

TRP is ultimately about being the best version of yourself that you can be. That includes mental and physical health, achieving your goals and dreams and not giving a fuck about what others, man or woman thinks. It’s also highly subjective. Some have goals to own a business and be wealthy, while another persons goals could be to live on a beach in some exotic country. Both are accurate since we all have different wants to make us happy. Personally I hate long hair, and would never grow mine out,…
/r/askTRP19/05/21 07:01 PM
6

It’s a sign of low interest or she’s just on there for validation with no intention of meeting up. If you get this line dropped on you, the odds are stacked against you and your effort is better used elsewhere. I used to get around this by saying “that sounds great, let’s “meet”’for a virtual drink tonight.” And video chat them. After 20 mins or so move that to a physical location or set up logistics. In my experiences tho, these women never wanted to actually meet up and it was a wash so now I …
/r/askTRP18/05/21 06:19 PM
3

The one good thing about TRP is, no matter what age you are, we all are faced with the same shit / comfort tests. Im going to try to break this down. A lot of posters here are black and white. Anything bad and automatic next. You obviously don’t subscribe to this or else you wouldn’t be asking internet strangers. What I saw from your story is this: you have a good thing going. Private beach access, jacuzzi, lift so your SMV isn’t the problem. Seeing her for the better part of the year with no co…
/r/askTRP18/05/21 05:10 AM
2

Exactly this OP, but spoiler alert, she’s not going to take you up on your offer. When someone genuinely wants to meet up, but has a legit reason for not doing so, they will suggest a time when they can. The fact that she didn’t tell you she had work and didn’t suggest a reschedule, you’re not worth her time so why is she worth yours.
/r/askTRP18/05/21 01:09 AM
17

I was in an LTR for a long ass time, and just got introduced to dating apps about a year ago. Holy shit, the rude awakening was deafening. There is a lot of trash on there, I got about 10 matches a week but the effort to weed out the crazies/just there for validation/and time bandits felt like a full time job. I did go on a shit ton of dates, but even if they were cool on text, the majority of them sucked in real life, and about 10% of the dates are what you’re describing, the lowest common deno…
/r/askTRP17/05/21 07:43 PM
3

So two things. Love-Bombing by itself isn’t indicative of BPD/NPD, but it’s the most blatant and is usually accompanied by other red flags and warning signs that you ignore because you’re so smitten. The fact that you’re posting on here to get advice from internet strangers tells me that something in your gut doesn’t feel right. The biggest tell tale sign is lack of empathy for others, and an inflated sense of self righteousness and importance. Nothing is ever their fault and all their past rela…
/r/askTRP17/05/21 06:38 PM
9

You get the fuck out of dodge, immediately. This is a tell tale sign of borderline personality disorder and/or Narcissistic personality disorder. They love bomb and mirror you so you think you’ve found your unicorn, then when you’re smitten they devalue you because it’s easy AF to lose frame and let your guard down. Once the devaluation begins, get ready for a rollercoaster of emotions. They will start gaslighting and resenting you, the shit they loved about you they start hating and there will …
/r/askTRP17/05/21 05:41 PM
10

Block her on EVERYTHING. Seeing a WhatsApp conversation of your ex tells me that you need to chill dude. Out of sight / out of mind, social media, texts, and when you know there’s legit no way of her contacting you, the healing can begin.
/r/askTRP12/05/21 09:07 PM
11

Is there something else to this story that you left out? Your girlfriend reacting this hard to your schedule is a huge red flag if it’s only about that. Not a shit test IMO, but a warning sign of things to come when she doesn’t get her way. Tread carefully.
/r/askTRP12/05/21 09:04 PM
19

I try and offer a different day we can meet up, and they’ll either say they also can’t meet up that day or they tell me maybe. You come off as thirsty. If someone wants to genuinely hang out, and cannot make it for something legit, they will reschedule, if they don't, not enough attraction was built. Dating apps are a cesspit, and there's so many hoes on there looking for validation and a lot of weirdos to boot and girls with shit personality that aren't worth your time in the first place. The o…
/r/askTRP12/05/21 08:40 PM
2

By not trying to fuck her she either thinks you're not that into her or that you're a pussy. I posted a question years ago about this same type of shit, and someone commented something that stuck with me. "A woman wants a man to take her, not someone who needs his mommy to hold his hand to pound town."
/r/askTRP12/05/21 08:34 PM
13

Move on. She has. You sound young, so take this as a learning experience. On dates. Always. Be. Escalating. No exception. Start with leading her with your hand on her back walking somewhere, touching her on the arm if she says something funny. If she was “crushing” on you on the first date, “let’s go back to my spot and hang out” and you should’ve tried to close. If not, build comfort and try again on the second date. What happened here is she put herself out there and wasted two dates and you d…
/r/askTRP12/05/21 08:09 PM
5

Exactly this. In addition to loose meaning she’s turned on, her extreme wetness can also make you lose sensation. Have her lay on her stomach and try that, one of my gotos when this happens.
/r/askTRP12/05/21 08:01 PM
6

“I just need time.” “I’m not ready for a relationship” are things women say to needy dudes with low SMV. When a woman goes through a breakup they go through a rebellious phase. Dying their hair, piercings, tattoos, riding the CC, all that shit. If the guy that breaks up with them doesn’t clamor or chase them, their hamster starts running and they have sellers remorse even if he was beta, toxic and needy. Once that attention gets pulled and they realize it, they try and get it back. Your friend s…
/r/askTRP11/05/21 05:30 PM
4

Second girl, “well let’s find out, drinks at my place tonight at 6?” As for the first go in with outcome independence. A girl keeping my attention for 2 weeks via text is a bet I wouldn’t take more so, keeping a girls attention via text is not worth it. If it happens, cool, if not send a cold text in a few weeks.
/r/askTRP05/05/21 08:15 PM
8

“I’ll let you know over a margarita. How’s tonight at 8 at xxxx’s sound?” Edit: women asking stupid shit like negative qualities about yourself are not only the easiest elementary shit test to pass, but it also skyrockets your SMV to a stranger because you’re already mysterious, she wants to find out for herself so cut to the chase. “I heard you’re a player. Is that true?” “Only one way to find out, movie at my house tonight?” “I bet you say that to all the girls” “Only the pretty ones, you feel…
/r/askTRP05/05/21 07:49 PM
22

Solid post. I think all of us have some narcissistic traits because thinking highly of oneself is just self preservation.... but to a degree. Years ago I had back to back LTR’s. First was a BPD, second was a covert NPD. I had just gotten out of a 6 year long LTR and was spinning plates, one jumped out at me. Gorgeous, accomplished, demon in the sack and we had the best time together. Dropped all other plates and entered a LTR with her. Almost immediately she started telling me lies about my frie…
/r/askTRP24/04/21 06:40 AM
6

You came off thirsty as hell. If a girl is going to friend zone her, let her and just cut your losses. If a woman who has a boyfriend is asking to hang out with someone that isn’t an orbiter, that’s really shitty LTR behavior. You asking if she had a boyfriend and then saying you cared for her is playing right into her frame, you made the decision for her so now she has to find someone else if she’s gonna branch swing.
/r/askTRP08/04/21 08:51 PM
13

Easier said than done, but you look at it as a learning experience. There are friends who will be nice because your LTR is your LTR, but if they start straight up hitting on her, they’re not your friends and you need to revise your relationship with them. Treat it as anyone showing you disrespect and next them. No point getting bent out of shape.
/r/askTRP08/04/21 08:24 PM
0

This right here, OP. Always always ALWAYS pay attention to a woman’s actions, not her words. Women are emotional creatures, and they’re not stupid. Any woman worth their salt can give an academy award worthy speech about how great you are, how they don’t want to mess things up, etc, but when it comes to action she’s still doing shit that she knows you’ll find questionable.
/r/askTRP24/03/21 10:40 PM
11

This 100% If you think you can relax and be vulnerable and talk about your feels with your female friends, you’re dead wrong. Female friends boiled down are interactions with women that you don’t have sex with. I had 2 female friends that I thought had my back unconditionally and both were in relationships so I didn’t think much of it. One saw me as the confident dude who had my shit together, didn’t take any Shit from anyone and was protective of her. Once I fell into a low point after a breaku…
/r/askTRP24/03/21 08:21 PM
7

110%. As you said in the OP it really puts into perspective how much cadence we put into normal conversation, and how easy that is to overthink. I can’t really explain it, but since I’ve adopted dirty talking my plates and being more dominant in bed, and seeing their responses, it’s transferred over big time to my inner game in normal life.
/r/askTRP23/03/21 10:36 PM
26

I was in an LTR for 9 years and my n count is about the same as OP. During my LTR and before I was the strong silent type. I had some freaky shit I liked to do, but never verbalized it. After my LTR a ONS brought it out of me, I figured what the hell try something new. Has it been a game changer for me, confidence wise. I’ve never realized how much women respond to strong and dominant dirty talk, I’ve been using it ever since and am disappointed I didn’t start sooner.
/r/askTRP23/03/21 09:56 PM
2

I don’t think so either. In the moment I overreacted and did some BP shit and accused her because I was insecure and my frame was weak as hell. Not my best showing. The reason I nexted was because of the lying corner and I agree. I did assume the worst and brought a firestorm. I’m taking this as a learning experience to work on myself.
/r/askTRP17/03/21 06:58 PM
2

I’m always looking for ways to improve myself, and I connect with what you’re saying. I definitely got comfortable and resorted back to behavior that’s not suitable for an LTR. Shit, I wouldn’t be with anyone who I had to walk on egg shells around, and I’m surprised I let myself be perceived that way. It’s a total learning experience. Should she have done that? Nah, but every action has a reaction and my inner frame needs some architecture. Thanks man
/r/askTRP17/03/21 06:49 PM
1

Zero point. And even wondering I’ve found out you’re playing a losing game. After I told her to leave I did block her on everything, so if she tried to reach out I wouldn’t know, but solid points.
/r/askTRP17/03/21 06:33 PM
2

Reading the responses here have been eye opening to say the least. I think you’re right on the money. Looking in hind sight MY disposition changed from being stoic and not caring to more emotional. You’re right, if she did tell me the truth I would’ve overreacted, just like I overreacted the next day questioning her. Back to working on myself to establish inner frame, I have some work to do.
/r/askTRP17/03/21 06:30 PM
1

I retract my initial comment of plate her but don’t catch feels. After you shared this, my foolproof advice is run the fuck away. What you just shared is the archetype of BPD. As someone who has lived through false rape accusations from my ex, being a victim of fraud, identity theft, fake pregnancies I’ll break down exactly what their cycle is. BPD’s are sad, pitiful excuses for human beings and they know it: They have absolutely nothing to offer anyone so they get through life manipulating weak…
/r/askTRP03/03/21 11:06 PM
3

That’s some shit dude. Sounds like you’re shell shocked by the turn of events. My ex LTR of 6 years took any reason to stay over at my house when we first started dating. In the past year I’ve had 3 plates ask if they could keep a drawer at my house for their clothes for when they spend the night. Current LTR that I promoted recently started subtly (to her knowledge) leaving bath stuff at my house and hinting hard to let her move in. The one piece of advice I can give you is look at this as a bl…
/r/askTRP03/03/21 08:36 AM
30

As someone who has made the mistake before. If a woman tells you she loves you too soon it’s a classic sign of BPD / NPD known as lovebombing. It’s classic manipulation and is kryptonite to guys that don’t have abundance mentality. I was there, it’s like a drug to yourself be put on a pedestal and be adored. But it’s short lived. They turn into a different person and end up resenting you. The old saying don’t stick your dick in crazy is derived from sticking your dick in BPD / NPD. If you have s…
/r/askTRP03/03/21 08:11 AM
6

It’s never too soon to fuck a new girl after a breakup. However, you have to be honest with yourself of why you’re doing it. I caught oneitis with an LTR and was with her for 6 years. She left me but it was long overdue, and I met and fucked a new girl the next week and it was liberating,, like why did it take so long for me to do something. However when I was younger I had an LTR leave me and I was devastated. Heartbroken I fucked a few girls shortly thereafter and it made me feel worse. Point …
/r/askTRP03/03/21 08:01 AM
4

Winner winner
/r/askTRP03/02/21 09:36 PM
8

Man does this hit home but it’s so true. I had a friend who I viewed as a sister who I dated in the past but it never panned out. She’s with a dude now that she doesn’t love and we reconnected and I thought she was ride or die. I went through a breakup a year ago but showed no emotion, she was chomping at the bit to come over to hang out and when she did suggested we drink and voluntarily got naked and before I knew it she was sucking me off despite my moral objections to her having a dude. Went…
/r/askTRP31/12/20 02:42 PM
16

Ain’t this the fucking truth. What is it about 3 months? Last 3 that’s when all the red flags came at me at light speed.
/r/askTRP27/12/20 12:46 AM
1

That's a good question, The other guys who were sitting with us knew, but I'm not sure if he was around or not when we were talking about it. Regardless though, since I was tipsy I let my emotions get the best of me. Banter would've been a lot better.
/r/askTRP28/06/16 08:35 PM
1

I saw him leaning against the chair and turned to talk to the bartender for about 5 seconds before she nudged me. So not long. But hat was my initial thought, she should've taken care of it and shot it down immediately.
/r/askTRP28/06/16 08:31 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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