~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| 1 | What a funny way to tell on yourself... If they ask you for an open marriage and you never gave any signs of wishing for such a thing, better be looking for lawyer ASAPShe didn’t love him. She’s just upset that people might think she’s a bad person for what she did. She wasn’t infatuated with him any more, wasn’t “in love” so time to kick him to the curb and seek limerence elsewhere. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/07/24 08:31 PM |
| 2 | Married a dentist full of ego and I am a software engineer who makes almost same as her. I can’t take anymore of this verbal, mental and physical abuse.After a while, get a backup recorder and then let her know that you are recording her and watch her go ballistic and get violent - on the backup recorder. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/02/24 12:07 AM |
| 1 | Married a dentist full of ego and I am a software engineer who makes almost same as her. I can’t take anymore of this verbal, mental and physical abuse.Contact some safe family or friend and create a plan to move yourself and your kids away from her - some place where she can’t find you. When you are gone, save, borrow or beg for the money for a restraining order divorce. In the meantime, use a voice recorder and document the abuse. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/02/24 12:04 AM |
| 4 | Met with Ex After 7 MonthsIs she a narcissist? Kinda sounds like somebody missing their narcissistic supply. Or she finds that men want her body, but nothing more, and the one man who knows her best, rejected her. She was testing whether you wanted her body. It is validating when somebody finds you attractive. It is not validating when somebody gets to know you and what they know about you makes them not even want to touch your sexy body. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/01/24 04:24 AM |
| 7 | In case you are missing your ex-wife today...That’s brutal. I’ll bet she never asked you what kind of garbage can her “partner” wanted in the bathroom. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/01/24 11:26 PM |
| 8 | My ex just got a ridiculous OFP against me and 3/4 children. I can’t believe she did this. This was easily the dumbest thing she’s ever done.TBH, they are so concerned about “protecting” women and children that they don’t care if they screw over men. It’s misandry. The judge in my FIL’s case apologized, because he didn’t think the screwing would go on for so long, because he thought it would be quickly resolved through mediation. But he didn’t change anything and allowed the screwing to continue. Eventually, he gave him a higher percentage of the sale of the house after MIL pissed off judge by repeatedly defying court orders and her … | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/01/24 01:29 AM |
| 2 | Cheating playbookSo the AP’s wife (AP2) wants you to cheat on your wife with her to make it even? Not content to have wrecked your life with their selfishness, trying to suck you into their web as well? | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/01/24 11:41 AM |
| 3 | This is not meThat’s true. But most of those women and men who would react negatively are 1) only familiar with the toxic parts, the asshole influencers, the misogyny, etc., or 2) steeped in misandry. Even people who think they are “normal” now, and don’t hold anti-male views, are steeped in misandry because the entire culture has oriented to negative connotations against men. You tell a room full of people that a man stabbed his girlfriend 25 times and the consensus will be that he is evil. You tell them a w… | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/01/24 06:38 PM |
| 0 | This is not meThe problem that I have is how bitter and anti-woman they are, to the point of dehumanizing them and using them for sex and denigrating any man who doesn’t hold the same view. Like I said, a lot of the information is pragmatic and valuable for dealing with women. It works. It works in relationships. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/01/24 05:34 PM |
| 4 | This is not meOne of the problems with women is that they don’t value what they are getting from some men because some women have conflicting desires. For example: they want a good, steady man who will provide stability, treat them right and capably provide financially and be a good dad. But then they get bored because they want to feel the excitement of doing things that don’t coincide with steady, safe, fiscally responsible living. So safe, steady, stability becomes ordinary, normal, boring and they feel li… | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/01/24 12:00 AM |
| 8 | This is not meIt’s because of how they define abuse. “He didn’t give me a remote property with a cabin and a creek and it was the ONLY thing I ever asked him for. Denying me this for years and years was emotional abuse!!!” | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 11:37 PM |
| 2 | This is not meYes, a problem with red pill is that many of the influencers and a lot of the members are very bitter from having been too trusting and having been used and abused by women. Once burned, twice shy. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 11:35 PM |
| 3 | This is not meAlpha males don’t attack women. They defend the weak and helpless. Alpha males are capable of doing great violence and possessed of great restraint. He’s posing to compensate for his low self esteem. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 05:41 PM |
| 2 | Haven't Filed Yet, But Soon, Asking For Advice & InputI have stopped talking to my wife about my appearance or my weight or whatever. She is overweight and has no empathy. In fact, it was a goal of hers to fatten me up so that I would weigh more than she did. It was close before I started dealing with my depression and coming to grips with a lot of this stuff. I would love for her to appreciate my body or the efforts I put into it. Instead I get talk of genetics. “Must be nice.” Now I do it solely for my self, because I know I will never get a “goo… | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 05:17 PM |
| 10 | This is not meSome of it is very good and very pragmatic. Some of it is toxic and misogynistic and shallow. In the end, which is more important, a constant stream of hot, self serving, vain, vapid babes through your bed, or a truly loving, giving, caring long term relationship with someone? They claim the former because the latter is a unicorn. Mythical. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 04:04 PM |
| 6 | Haven't Filed Yet, But Soon, Asking For Advice & InputI’m sorry. I just don’t buy the “it’s not you.” Neither should you. You should absolutely take it personally. Because if you don’t, it’s going to hurt you so badly when she gets into the next relationship and they are very sexually active - until her resentments towards that dude kills her sex drive. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 04:00 PM |
| 3 | Cheating playbookSome people have a remarkable way of compartmentalized things or justifying them or minimizing them or creating a perspective that differs from most of us. For instance, told your wife that you had to work late, but you took off and went to a sports event with your buddy that she didn’t want you to hang out with? Years ago. And she found out. And she wants to divorce. You’d be like, “yes, I shouldn’t have lied to you and yes I know you didn’t like that I hung out with him, but he had tickets to … | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 03:52 PM |
| 3 | Cheating playbookGood questions AP. From other posts you’ve made it sounds like these are some of the answers: These are some of the questions I asked. Why did you do it? -20yo, curious about their lifestyle Are you in love with your affair partner? -no Why did you have his child? -I thought it was yours until 3yo, noticed eyes and nose. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 03:37 PM |
| 2 | People in western world are lucky - not stuck forever like IndiaI see a number of issues that contribute. 1) courts being biased towards women so that a divorce doesn’t hurt them very badly, coupled with, as you indicated, a lack of societal judgement for divorcing without cause, and a societal acceptance for such a woman being promiscuous after divorce. 2) women making their own money and often out learning men, leading them to think they are better than men and deserve better - coupled with all of the other factors above. 3) men having generations of accum… | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/01/24 03:10 PM |
| 8 | I'm terrified.One of the attributes of a narcissistic abuser is driving away your friends to try to isolate you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/01/24 09:11 PM |
| 6 | People in western world are lucky - not stuck forever like IndiaMaybe you’re right. It seems like there is an increasing number of women that are realizing nobody wants to settle down with a 40 something, but nobody is telling them that. They have to find out for themselves after they’ve been told that they deserve better. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/01/24 01:15 AM |
| 10 | People in western world are lucky - not stuck forever like IndiaWhere does mental health factor in here? Or the discontentment fostered by modern misandristic feminism? I see videos of women who divorce their husbands because they think they deserve better and then realize nobody wants a 45yo single mom with lots of emotional baggage who left a man just because she wasn’t happy enough. “I left the ‘good man’ and it’s ok to leave a good man to pursue your happiness” they tell each other. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/01/24 12:03 AM |
| 10 | People in western world are lucky - not stuck forever like IndiaMy wife hasn’t cheated, but she gave me a similar story about how much pressure she was feeling … as a stay at home mom who didn’t clean anything except the kitchen and who only cooked a few times a week where literally everybody in the family was oriented to making her desires reality and doing what we could to relieve her from stress and expectations. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/01/24 11:41 PM |
| 12 | People in western world are lucky - not stuck forever like IndiaIt’s like it incentivized women to cheat but not men. Yikes. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/01/24 10:25 PM |
| 4 | Cheating playbookDid she give any kind of full confession, say why, how, when, how long? Like WTF??? She had an affair and then made you raise his baby and then continued to work with him and let you interact with him, while he smirks, knowing he cuckolded you and made you raise his kid??? Sheesh. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/01/24 10:19 PM |
| 8 | Cheating playbookYour lawyer may be able to confirm, but it seems like you can sue for back child support. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/01/24 10:17 PM |
| 1 | Walked away from my wife and her daughterAnd we see stories on Reddit every day about women wanting to end their marriages because men want a paternity test, even in cases when the men have been cheated on many times in the past and have extreme insecurities. And all of the misandrists just tell her to divorce his ass. He’s not worthy of her. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/01/24 10:11 PM |
| 4 | Someone talk some sense into me.It doesn’t matter if you created the environment. It’s great to acknowledge that and improve yourself. But she made her decisions and she has shown herself to be a woman of low character. So IF you make the changes that you think you should (which are probably NOT the changes that you need to make, just the changes SHE wants you to make which will put you in a worse position) or IF you make the changes that you should, and IF you miraculously win back the heart of your wife and she is remorseful… | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/12/23 06:42 AM |
| 3 | Someone talk some sense into me.I feel so bad for you right now. I have felt the same in the past. Recognize that the wife that you knew and loved is gone. The person that replaced her doesn’t care about you. Every single thing that she does for you now is either habit, last vestiges of common decency, or manipulation. You’re her safety net if her monkey branch doesn’t work out, but she would leave you in a heartbeat without any present regrets or empathy for your feelings if she got the right signals from AP. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/12/23 06:38 AM |
| 2 | Seeking Advice: Wife Left on Thanksgiving with Kids and Dog, Claims Lack of TrustMan, I wouldn’t let her touch me. Maybe it is counterintuitive, but rejecting her may be better for getting her back than letting her have which parts of you she wants when she wants them and rejecting you the rest of the time. “I’ll take money and sex when I want it and you doing the heavy lifting and you coming running every time I need you, and I reject you the rest of the time, you have to take care of yourself, meanwhile I’m going to start sampling the fare and see if I can completely repla… | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/12/23 05:40 PM |
| 2 | This is gonna be harder than I thoughtMerry Christmas. Being lonely is hard. It sucks. And it seems like the one who betrayed you so badly gets everything, without consequence. That won’t last. There are lots of lonely people out there. Start talking to people and you’ll find them. Make new friends. Today, watch a movie where the good guys triumph. That’s going to be you. The Bible says that the wealth of the sinner is stored up for the righteous. So yes, she has the truck, the house that you worked on and paid on, the kids, the bf,… | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/12/23 05:00 PM |
| 3 | This is gonna be harder than I thoughtSounds like she was just angry at you for being a good man and doing loving things while she was screwing somebody else. It seems common that cheaters need to nitpick and be angry in order to justify their betrayal. I’m sorry for your loneliness. This will pass. You need to find a purpose beyond just making it through a day. They were your purpose and that’s gone. She has revealed her true colors as a user and and abuser who took advantage of you. At some point you will realize this and that you… | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/12/23 04:22 PM |
| 1 | She is going to have to work for the first time in her life hahahaStill with her AP? | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/12/23 04:13 AM |
| 1 | It seems the less attention you give them the more they want to be with youBefore you you cut them off they perceived you as weak. They didn’t respect you. They didn’t think you capable of doing anything except capitulating to their manipulations, sucking it up, acquiescing and moving one. They have a new found respect. Build on that. Be strong and then stronger. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/12/23 03:52 AM |
| 1 | I'm such a chump but just can't take it anymoreShe will be in bed with the next guy. She seems like a user. And she is going to use you. But the next time she wants to use you, you’ll be ready and able to establish the boundaries that you need. If something bad happens, tell her you’ll watch the kids. No more than that. She abandoned you and your marriage and with it your emotional and logistical support. Just say no. No to everything except taking care of your kids. When she asks, “do you think you would be able to pick up dinner for all of… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 11:12 PM |
| 1 | I'm such a chump but just can't take it anymore“Suffering daily” Why? Because her AP dumped her? Certainly not because she drove a knife through your heart. She cause your pain - and is doing nothing to help you heal from it. But, she wants support for her pain. And what you are doing might be hysterical bonding. It feels good. But it’s not real. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 11:07 PM |
| 1 | Rant: I’ve been doing well protecting my peace until tonight it hit me like a brick wallAgreed, from what I have seen, it’s all fun and games until they have to do life together. Which is why by she still wants OP in her life. She wants OP to do the hard part of life with her and walk through all the shit with her so she can keep everything clean and perfect and stress-free with AP. OP has to grey rock her. I would even suggest that if she isn’t asking about the kids, you don’t tell her about the kids until handoff. Then give her a piece of paper with anything pertinent, assuming t… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 09:00 PM |
| 1 | I need more boundariesShe wants you to eat all of the crap, while she saves all of the good stuff for AP. You’re the emotional support for all of the hard things so that she can be bright and happy with AP and their relationship can be all roses. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 07:48 PM |
| 1 | I’m trying to figure out how to best be there for my kids while simultaneously processing this divorce process.You forgot: - emotional support, dumping on you all of the shit she needs to get out about work, friends, family, even AP, stuff she doesn’t want to clutter up their relationship with. - you being friends with her is absolution for all of her cheating: she can excuse herself and she can use it to show other people it wasn’t bad, cuz you’re ok with it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 07:47 PM |
| 2 | After 14 months...Sock DayIs ex-wife happy and contented now and enjoying the bed she made instead of being “discontented” and “miserable” with you? | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 05:28 PM |
| 2 | I don’t want a relationship again because I’m worried what it will do to my two boys.Am I The Asshole? r/AITA | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/23 01:39 AM |
| 5 | Wife trying to come back after leaving me for affair partnerI think, go through with the divorce. Then if you want, if the stars align, make her win you back. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/23 04:12 AM |
| 3 | Came across this on IG, made perfect sense to me. What do you think?TBF, most men are pretty simple, so there is some truth. But also, without success at work and at home, a lot of men don’t branch out to have other purposes, hobbies and activities. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/12/23 04:24 AM |
| 3 | Came across this on IG, made perfect sense to me. What do you think?For me it is the “all I’m asking for is XYZ.” Provide (solve problem) XYZ, nothing changes except the excuses: “all I’m asking for is ABC.” | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/12/23 04:22 AM |
| 3 | Came across this on IG, made perfect sense to me. What do you think?Seems pretty spot on to me. When you pour love into your kids, you get love back. When you poor energy into work, you get success back. When you poor energy and love into your wife and all you get back is discontentment, why would you keep trying? | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/12/23 04:21 AM |
| 5 | Party Invitations…Ex-wife on E-mail ListI’ve read your story and it makes my heart ache. I hope you find all the happiness and success that you can and that those two find the misery and destruction they deserve when the seeds they planted grow. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/12/23 04:15 AM |
| 1 | I asked for it, so why do I feel like the failure?I can see that you are triggered by this information. I will not bother you with more triggering information. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/12/23 05:09 PM |
| 5 | I asked for it, so why do I feel like the failure?“Wow, you’re moving on already?” Reply: “you moved on a while ago and didn’t even have the decency to inform me ahead of time.” Or: “finding out your wife moved on from you and cheated kinda kills all the love, so, yes.” Or: “do you think there is something special about you that you can cheat on me and I will pine for you and forever?” | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/12/23 07:55 PM |
| 3 | I asked for it, so why do I feel like the failure?https://www.cbs.nl/en-gb/news/2016/13/lesbian-couples-likelier-to-break-up-than-male-couples https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/03631990221122966 Psychology today says that gay is most likely to breakup followed by lesbian. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/meet-catch-and-keep/201710/are-same-sex-or-heterosexual-relationships-more-stable | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/12/23 03:14 PM |
| 6 | I asked for it, so why do I feel like the failure?I can’t tell you how many stories I have read of lesbian women preying on women with trauma, destroying their marriage and then breaking up with them within a year or so. You need to be prepared for when her lesbian relationship ends. You need to expect it and have planned how you will react to it when your STBXW comes back begging and playing the victim card. I’ve read that statistically, a lesbian relationship is the most unstable. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/12/23 06:48 AM |
| 2 | My Desk and ChairIf you live around TN, I have a large all wood desk with a marble inlay top. I’ll sell it to you cheap. :) | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/12/23 03:26 AM |
| 1 | I changed and it still wasn’t enough.I don’t think you said what you mean. Try again. It’s simultaneously pathetic AND empowering? | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/12/23 07:28 AM |
| 12 | I changed and it still wasn’t enough.If the opportunity ever presents, let her know, “I vowed to spend the rest of my life with you taking you just as you were. I didn’t marry you and then demand drastic changes in order to remain with you. I would have stayed with you forever because I loved you for who you were. You never loved me for who I was. You loved who you thought you could make me into. You never loved me and it’s taken me until now to realize this. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/12/23 01:32 AM |
| 3 | Wife realized she is too gay to stay with me-“She won't, but I would say no.” Good for you. I wouldn’t be so certain. I read so many of these stories now. Sometimes it is 6 months. Sometimes 3 years. Sometimes 10 years. There is a pattern of seeking new relationship energy and then after a time, realizing how empty and lacking substance it is compared to the boring life they left behind. Be strong. I’m sorry that you’re hurting. Be the best man you can be for yourself and your kids. Save your kids from the inherent instability of her rela… | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 02:50 PM |
| 5 | Wife realized she is too gay to stay with meThat’s what I thought. It’s not true. Men will never be obsolete until there are no jars to open. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 06:02 AM |
| 2 | Wife realized she is too gay to stay with meIt is doubtful this relationship will last a year especially if she’s already making contingency plans. What are you going to do if she comes crawling back and is very apologetic? | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 05:48 AM |
| 5 | Wife realized she is too gay to stay with me“Exploring her sexuality” was just an excuse to have fun while you paid all the bills and eventually to interview and select your replacement - while you paid the bills and baby sat the kid. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 05:47 AM |
| 1 | Wife realized she is too gay to stay with meWas it a woman saying that? | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 05:44 AM |
| 3 | Wife realized she is too gay to stay with meThis sounds like a good plan. Kick her out. Tell her that if she is truly leaving you for her lover, she leaves now. Other option is to cut off ties and close the marriage. In the vanishingly small possibility that she chooses the latter, divorce her when it is most advantageous to you. I’d be shocked if she was actually sorry for the shitty way she treated you. It would make far more sense to me that somebody cautioning her that being cruel to you is going to end badly for her and is coaching h… | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/12/23 05:43 AM |
| 2 | Do you think divorce is contageius?It certainly seems plausible that once the ice is broken, the stigma is lifted, even if the divorcees weren’t spreading poison to the married couples, which of course is quite possible. Read so many stories where wife meets new divorced friends and her whole demeanor and language changes, she starts making accusations of emotional abuse, expresses her need for independence, talks about how controlling the husband is, etc. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/23 03:55 AM |
| 16 | Passive aggressive stbxw (rant)Judging by your other posts, she’s deliberately trying to hurt you to provoke a reaction. It could be she wants a reaction which proves that you still love her. It could be she wants a reaction to relish your pain. Don’t give her a reaction. Also, and this is pretty sound advice in all areas of life, don’t hinge important plans on the actions of others. For instance let’s assume you setup something like this again. Let her know that if she doesn’t text you that she’s on her way back by x time, y… | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/23 03:51 AM |
| 2 | She fucked another manShe’s trying to hurt you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/23 03:45 AM |
| 6 | Wife wants divorce, but promised if I changed we’ll be back together.She has women from the battered women shelter whispering in her ear. That’s why he has to change. Of course, no change will ever be good enough. It’s just a lever for control. Always dangling the carrot of staying together and waving the stick of divorce to extract whatever is wanted. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/23 12:04 AM |
| 2 | Wife wants divorce, but promised if I changed we’ll be back together.Nvm. I just read the other post you made. I still think you need to work on yourself. But your marriage is over as long as she has these new friends. She has a bunch of women who have been damaged by men and are bitter and have adopted misandry as a defense speaking into her ears and coloring every interaction she relates to them and you will NEVER be able to do anything right again in their eyes. Everything will be categorized ss abuse. And your wife will ALWAYS exaggerate what happened in your… | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/23 12:02 AM |
| 6 | Wife wants divorce, but promised if I changed we’ll be back together.Depends on what she wants you to change. If she wants you to stop being an womanizing, wife-beating alcoholic who spends all of his time out of the house and barely speaks to his children, maybe she has a point. If she wants you to stop eating cheese puffs, playing video games, lose 50lbs and get a job, it may be something to consider. If she wants to emasculate you and establish a matriarch my where you are constantly not good enough and she can hold the specter of divorce over you for the rest… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 11:53 PM |
| 9 | Had a chat with my wife - finances -- went better than expectedI feel bad for you. She is using you right now for resources while openly planning her soft landing for when she exits. She is going through the motions and doing the minimum required to maintain her current security. It sounds like it is time to show her to the door next time she talks about leaving or feeling trapped. Grab a bag and help her start packing. Pick up some boxes and start packing up stuff she never uses. When she asks what you are doing just tell her you’re getting a head start on… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 10:31 PM |
| 2 | How screwed am I?Beg, borrow and beg some more to get money for the lawyer for the divorce. I’m not exactly sure what the benefit of fighting the CPO would be except to get your truck back. I’m assuming there will be a court date and you can petition the court at that time and tell them that you don’t want to have anything to do with that woman and her lies, you want to stay far away from her lest she falsely accuse you of something else, you just want your stuff back, and both of your cars. But you need a lawye… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 10:10 PM |
| 1 | Just want to be heardYou don’t think there should be consequences for cheaters? You think you should keep their secrets for them? | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 09:56 PM |
| 1 | Legal downsides to being a jerk to my cheating SBTXW once the divorce is final?It’s probably not a bad thing to send an email with all of the ways that she wronged you. Not how she hurt you. Not how destroyed you were. But objectively the ways she wronged you. No name calling. Then let it go. Don’t respond if she responds. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 06:17 AM |
| 1 | Legal downsides to being a jerk to my cheating SBTXW once the divorce is final?Good job. You need to pre game some responses to her complaining. If she complains over the phone or in person, consider, “hey, I’ve got to run. Can you jot that down in an email to me so that I can give it the time it deserves?” I don’t know your situation but maybe, “Thank you for your input.” “I’ll consider your critique.” “<silence>”, hang up the phone in the middle of a haranguing. IDK. One thing I have learned is that arguing with my wife is not productive. I can only imagine it would be w… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 06:15 AM |
| 1 | Legal downsides to being a jerk to my cheating SBTXW once the divorce is final?You shouldn’t do it for a lot of reasons. One of them being, it shows her you still care. You still have strong feelings for her. Ignore everything. Every false accusation, every jibe, every bit of bait. Ignore it all. Grey rock. Strictly business and use the fewest words possible. She’s not worth your time. Some women get off on knowing that they hurt you and knowing that you are bothered. It’s amazing the stories from women who get this grey rock treatment. “He must really hate me.” There is n… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 06:09 AM |
| 2 | Being led around by my dickWell, first I would say stop the hysterical bonding. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 05:31 AM |
| 2 | Anger turning into bitternessSome people say to forgive. That might work. IDK. I’m religious. I don’t believe in forgiveness when it hasn’t been asked for or when there is no remorse and no fault has been admitted. This is a Biblical principle. Another is that you tell somebody exactly how they wronged you. What I do though is this: again I said that I was religious. I give it to God. In the Bible, God says, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay.” I believe that. Others believe in Karma. Most of use believe in natural consequenc… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 05:23 AM |
| 2 | Tomorrow I get my stuff backDid you ever find out her reaction when she came home and found you gone? Did you ever confront her about the cheating? Did she dump you/initiate the divorce? | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 05:15 AM |
| 0 | Just want to be heardMan, if there was another guy, if the divorce is finalized, I would make a vague post about “the other guy” on a social media platform, not with any specific accusations of cheating, just vague references based on the evidence that you have. Something like, “while I was working hard to improve our family’s station, she was making accusations to friends and family that I was angry, scary and controlling. While I was trying to be fully engaged at home and with my kids, there was another guy. I was… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 04:08 AM |
| 1 | Ex Called to Meet UpI wouldn’t actually suggest an option just to see what she comes up with by herself. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 03:00 AM |
| 2 | Ex Called to Meet UpWhy does it have to be meeting in person? Why would you do that with somebody that was abusive? Why can’t she tell you her news over the phone or video chat? Regardless, even if you are ok meeting up with her, it would be an interesting experiment to tell her that you’ve thought about it, and don’t want to meet up, and see what her next move is. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 01:53 AM |
| 1 | STBX sending mixed signalsMan, I read a story a few days ago about a woman who told her husband sometime after the divorce, while she was shacked up with her AP, that she expected him to show up at the courthouse and prevent the divorce from being finalized. That sounds like delusion. My wife separated from me. Prior to that she spent a lot of time out of the house with friends, just announcing she was leaving and that the kids were with me. No timeline, no checking to see if I had anything else going on. When she was ho… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 01:34 AM |
| 2 | Meeting ex's new BF for the first time tonight - suggestions?Re your update: sounds like they are both afraid of you/ashamed (which may mean she cheated with him). Honestly, I’d be tempted to keep that going and let them wallow in it and not do anything to hasten a meeting that might normalize relations. But I’m open to contrary opinions. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 12:13 AM |
| 7 | So my wife wants to buy me outI rejected an offer on a house in 2007. I had already moved out. I rejected the offer because it was too low. Took 8 months to sell and I got $20k more. I pretty much broke even and had the headache of it for 8 additional months. Cash out. It’s not a great market. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 12:09 AM |
| 9 | So my wife wants to buy me outIf you are looking at netting $22k, you are far better off taking $20k now. Here’s my reasoning: Your half of mortgage and utilities is probably at least $1250/month. If you got an offer for $400k tomorrow, it would probably take 5-6 weeks to close, although perhaps faster since the market is slow. It might just be 4 weeks. So best case scenario you would be looking at $22k - $1250 = $20,750. Yay! You’re ahead $750. If it takes 60 days to get an offer and close, you’re behind by $500. And it jus… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/23 12:04 AM |
| 2 | Well, wife wants to go to the streetsYou’ve been talking about divorce for two years. Either do it or don’t do it. Also, I would get paternity tests. Document all of the time that you spend with the kids and what you do around the house and the amount of time she is gone. May help in custody. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/12/23 03:02 PM |
| 2 | Wife postponed mediation and is text harassing me trying to emotionally blackmail me.He could. But it’s pointing out their hypocrisy then he offers the exact same thing and outrage ensues. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 10:35 PM |
| 2 | What’s a man to do?I’ve had friends have CPS on their doorstep for taking a nap in their car with their kid in a parking lot while their spouse was in the store. CPS said they had to do a home inspection in order to close out the case. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 09:32 PM |
| 1 | Wife postponed mediation and is text harassing me trying to emotionally blackmail me.Delusional. Greedy and selfish. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 08:46 PM |
| 4 | Wife postponed mediation and is text harassing me trying to emotionally blackmail me.Excellent. $40k for her, you keep the childhood home of the kids where they can spend 50% of their time, and you have 18 months to pay it off. I would imagine if you fix it up it would sell for a lot more. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 08:44 PM |
| 2 | Ex keeps emailing me about financial problemsThat’s a serious level of discontentment that you were never going to be able to satisfy. And neither will the bedding, or anything else she buys, or any new relationship. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 08:40 PM |
| 3 | Ex keeps emailing me about financial problemsThat’s a serious level of discontentment that you were never going to be able to satisfy. And neither will the bedding, or anything else she buys, or any new relationship. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 08:24 PM |
| 1 | Ex keeps emailing me about financial problemsMorbid curiosity … did something drastic happen to the old bedding? | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/12/23 07:48 PM |
| 2 | Walk Away WifeI know it is probably hard to write about this, but when you get in a better headspace, I wish you would take some time to write about what conditions were like before she took her life. There are so many cheating stories, a few of them end with one partner or the other taking their life and more of them where they tried, and many more where they considered it. Basically, did you see any warning signs we might be on the lookout for? It just seems so strange to me that she went from basically an … | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/23 12:35 AM |
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