j_middlefinger Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
16	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse?	Marriage/Children	j_middlefinger	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 02:06 AM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
-6	British Army soldier, 24, hanged himself after being told to 'man up' when he asked for time off to look after his four-year-old daughter during lockdown while his nurse wife worked on NHS frontline Ok, hold the fuck up. So after being told to man up, he killed himself, thereby denying his daughter a father for the rest of her life? I’m sorry, but something about this narrative isn’t making sense to me. It’s bullshit that he would be denied the ability to care for his daughter under such circumstances. It’s more bullshit that he took all of his pain and put it on the shoulders of his wife and child. I don’t care who you are or what you’re going through - if you love your kids, you take ever…	/r/MensRights	20/03/21 02:52 AM
8	A man was brutally beaten and sexually assaulted (by having batteries forced inside him) by two women and half my town are laughing about it and cracking jokes It’s obviously in poor taste considering there is a very real victim here, but we as humans tend to be able to easily distance ourselves from things like this when we don’t know the victim, can’t see it happening to ourselves, or we don’t have an innate protectiveness toward that subdivision of humanity. As an example, most of us, male or female, have an innate protective response when we hear stories about children being victimized. Many men feel the same way about women. We generally don’t hav…	/r/MensRights	19/02/21 10:31 PM
2	My daughter’s birthday.. Man, I feel you. I’m afraid to even go to court in the first place because of how much worse things can get. I would definitely suggest documenting everything at a minimum.	/r/MensRights	02/12/20 01:12 AM
-2	Toxic masculinity That was a really sweet story. Let’s be real, though. Not every guy would’ve been so awesome and helpful, but I’d like to think that a lot of them would be. However, I think that a large number would simply steer clear of the little girl, even where they might be willing to help a little boy. Society has kind of wired us to be fearful in this regard, as even when acting in only the most upright of ways, all it takes is a misperception by another to tear your world apart. It’s really sad. It’s sa…	/r/MensRights	18/02/20 07:32 PM
1	Openly harassed on the bus this morning. If I were in your position, I would totally rock an eye patch. That way people such as you mentioned would automatically realize the issue, but a significant majority would think I looked badass enough to just wait patiently instead of bothering me. I suppose it depends on your appearance though. It would certainly work better for, say, George Clooney than it would for Danny DeVito. Might be kind of fun to try for a time, and if it ends up not being your thing, at least Halloween is near.	/r/MensRights	04/10/19 02:17 AM
2	Wow... could you imagine the uproar if a man had 3 topless woman on a leash? Nikita Dragun is a male-to-female transgender YouTuber, so it’s not exactly the best example to use though the point is still well taken.	/r/MensRights	28/08/19 06:24 AM
1	I was extremely excited about this hackathon in my high school (I am 16 M) because I love coding. But then, I realised it said empowering girls and now I can’t go to it. I am very pissed off and sad. Idk where to post it but here. Realistically, I think girls are being empowered whether or not any males take part. It seems to me that if females truly need empowerment in this area, a passionate male who wants to take part in this event even though it is geared toward empowering women, would be a welcomed addition. Talk to the organizers nicely and just see what they say about you taking part. If they give you a firm “girls only”, then you can obviously take further action of some kind if you feel it’s warranted. That said,…	/r/MensRights	19/05/19 05:20 PM
1	Emily doesn't seem to get it... Yeah. It’s a price she’s willing to pay because she isn’t paying it. What a bitch!	/r/MensRights	28/04/19 03:05 AM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? I’ll order it now. Thanks!	/r/MensRights	17/04/19 01:45 AM
2	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Interestingly, I’ve long suspected she is borderline, too. The primitive affect component absolutely fits her like a slipper, and interestingly, I found out that BPD is rather common amongst deaf people who were mainstream educated. I’ve gone so far as to purchase and read textbooks from the leading authority on BPD and even e-mail and consult him about her. It’s really tough to deal with, as you well know, and I wish all of my research was more helpful in dealing with her. She refuses to even c…	/r/MensRights	17/04/19 01:31 AM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? You are quite right, and I thank you very much for reminding me just how good I actually have it. Interestingly, during my time in the Air Force, I got to spend a lot of time in the Gulf as well as several years in the U.K., and it really saddens me to hear just how stacked against you the justice systems in both countries have been. I wish you success in getting your legal divorce put through, and I hope that you will find a way to have the relationship with your child that you deserve. Again, …	/r/MensRights	17/04/19 12:56 AM
2	Smash the Patriarchy I’ll drink to that!	/r/MensRights	17/04/19 12:31 AM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? That is true that it’s of my own making. Firstly, I didn’t do a very good job of vetting her, and I created this situation because I had sex with her. I was content taking things slow and getting to know her, but I allowed her to pressure me and got in way over my head. It’s not gifts for mom, though. It’s things like heating oil, food, fuel, clothing/shoes/coats, etc., that the kids need and she can’t provide without my help. Mom is actually pretty selfless in that regard - she spends almost no…	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 11:38 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? It hasn’t been ordered officially. Not providing support would make me a scumbag of the highest degree and unworthy of being a father. I talked to one attorney a few years ago, and she suggested I stop, but how on Earth could I do that? I’d rather the courts refuse to recognize my financial contributions over the years and order support going back to their births, thereby breaking my back, than to not provide for their needs. She doesn’t work - she just gets a small amount from social security. …	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 10:21 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? You’re absolutely right on all counts. Thank you for sharing this wisdom with me. I’m still fearful, but I know that it’s only getting worse and it’s only hurting me and the children more by allowing it to continue. I’m not worried or upset about the potential of there being a stepdad. My concern is that stepdad will get to be more of a dad and have more time with my kids than I’ll get, and that would destroy me. I’ve already lost so much time with them. To be paying so much child support that I…	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 10:09 PM
3	Smash the Patriarchy That is some spot-on analysis. I don’t understand how anyone could read what you’ve written and come away not seeing the truth in your words. It really is messed up that this discussion has to be had in the first place	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:59 PM
2	Smash the Patriarchy Nathan E. Michael can’t hear it, but I’m giving him a heartfelt standing ovation right now...	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:51 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? This is exactly the same thing that I fear happening, because your description of your ex is so shockingly similar to how she is. I have the advantage of having the support of the child welfare department, but in the end, there was nothing even they could do because she is so stubborn, shrewd, and smart. I really picked a winner, huh? Truth is, I know that it’s something within me that brought me to such a woman. Unlike her though, I’ve been receiving psych care since like 2003 when I was in the…	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:44 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Thank you very much. I’ll certainly do that	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:35 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Sadly, that is probably very much the case. I’m very, very glad that you were able to disprove her malicious lies and get the support of social services and the courts. It’s really heartbreaking to think of all of those men out there who have been in that same position and weren’t able to disprove those kinds of allegations because everyone was too sympathetic to her because she’s a woman	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:34 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Yeah. We weren’t ever married. I’m on the birth certificates and a voluntary acknowledgment of paternity form was filed at the time of their birth, but that does nothing with regard to custody. We’re technically still together, like I said, because the only reason I get to see my kids is because of the relationshit. Otherwise, I just feel like an ATM card and a rube. Anyway, as such there is no CO at the moment. She’s smart and shrewd enough to where the child welfare department has had to basic…	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:30 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? As it turns out, I am terrible at reddit and my replies keep mistakenly going to the main thread and not in response to those I am wanting to reply to...	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 09:27 PM
2	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Thank you very much. Unfortunately, MA is a two-party consent state, so it’s really tough to make that work. She’s smart enough to know that she just has to not consent to be recorded. Their mom is very anti-counseling/therapy. Go figure. I mentioned I thought one of the older girls would benefit from talking to someone and the result was a massive blowup about how she doesn’t believe in counseling and how “it doesn’t work for us”, doing her usual passing her feelings off as those of the kids. S…	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 08:05 PM
1	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Thank you very much for sharing. I really appreciate it a lot. I am really concerned about my girls developing the same neuroses as their mother because I’m not there enough to be a balancing influence. I’m really glad you mentioned that.	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 03:34 AM
2	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Thank you very much for sharing, man. It’s bullshit that the courts aren’t able to actually compel testing to ensure that the child is actually being educated. I am grateful that I was out of the military before having kids - I had several deployments and a 3-year long tour assignment overseas. I can only imagine how terrible that would’ve been trying to deal with custodial issues like you did.	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 02:45 AM
2	Men of Reddit who have gone through custody battles with an extremely unreasonable, controlling partner: did the courts actually make things better or did things get worse? Thank you very much for sharing, man. It’s bullshit that the courts aren’t able to actually compel testing to ensure that the child is actually being educated. I am grateful that I was out of the military before having kids - I had several deployments and a 3-year long tour assignment overseas. I can only imagine how terrible that would’ve been trying to deal with custodial issues like you did.	/r/MensRights	16/04/19 02:44 AM