lavenderhoneywoods Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
3	GSA (genetic sexual attraction) is so weird and seems to be against what evolution intended for us. I’ve heard of siblings & half siblings who weren’t raised together meeting as adults and being attracted to each other. So I think being raised together & cognizant that you’re related from a young age has a lot to do with our brains saying “gross! incest!” at the idea of that person.	/r/PurplePillDebate	02/06/22 06:17 PM
1	"Above a certain income level, all men are paying for sex" Scott Adams Isn’t Scott Adams the Dilbert guy? What happened? Dilbert was actually pretty good too.	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/06/21 09:55 PM
1	"Above a certain income level, all men are paying for sex" Scott Adams “Deciding to get rich” oof.	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/06/21 08:14 PM
–	How many of the men complaining about the dating scene are actually worthy of dating? I think many guys who are struggling have a major issues in one or more areas. Most often I’ve encountered guys who are otherwise dateable (good personality, not bad looking, decent to good job) who have a hygiene issue. I don’t get how someone who’s otherwise pretty good can just not ever wear deodorant but I’ve seen it often. Sometimes it’s more grooming than hygiene, if you always look unkempt and wear clothes that don’t fit and are very outdated, you sell yourself short. I bought one ex of m…	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/06/21 09:27 PM
1	What argument here has changed your mind? Most women by that age realize they’ll have to rush to find a partner willing to commit if they’re not in a serious LTR. I’ve seen women freak out around 28-29 because they’re not in a relationship or they’re not in a serious one	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/06/21 02:26 AM
7	What argument here has changed your mind? They are more grounded. At this point 90% of my friends are from Europe, not the US. US culture is kind of harsh in a way that I think messes with your head. You’re encouraged, as a woman, to have fun, be independent, go out, be silly, be promiscuous if you want, enjoy your single years...but then once you hit the wall around 28-32, people say “well you should have done xyz...” and very few people outside of religious communities are encouraging young people to focus on being ready to get marrie…	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/06/21 05:40 PM
3	What argument here has changed your mind? It’s not everywhere in the US, I suspect. I’d never seen or heard of anything like it until I read this sub. I’ve lived in the Midwest, both rural and urban, and in the rural Northeast. I did ask my husband and he said that behavior was common in NYC. Maybe it’s regional. Who knows.	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/06/21 01:20 PM
3	FDS being as large as it is shows how out of touch some women are and that doesn’t help get women results. If you’re on a “dating strategy” suffice to say you’re not super successful at dating. Most subs are echo chambers. Choose what you wanna hear.	/r/PurplePillDebate	11/06/21 12:42 AM
1	What is the best way to ease a date into me eating a special/restrictive diet? I would seriously consider seeking someone with similar dietary needs—vegan, celiac, gym bro type, someone who is maintaining a weight loss, etc. They’re more likely to be accommodating and get it.	/r/RedPillWomen	08/06/21 10:32 PM
0	What do you think is the cause for the supposed disparity between what women say they want and what they actually respond to? So I’m gonna cut through all of this and ask: if men who are otherwise happy in their LTR fantasize about hot-crazy, and if men who are out playing the field like to hookup with hot-crazy, but settle down with a more stable but less exciting partner, why does any of this matter? I’m willing to accept the reality that my husband probably has fantasized about other women. He has definitely had sexual relationships prior to our relationship. But I’m a mature enough person to recognize that none of …	/r/PurplePillDebate	30/05/21 04:14 PM
1	I’m 30 and I don’t know how to apply make up. Aaaah my skin also looked noticeably tired after I had my daughter (sleep deprivation is great huh?). What helped was making sure I’m eating a balanced diet with plenty of fruit and veg, exercise (makes skin look more rosy), and just sticking to a very basic skincare routine (just cleanser, cleansing cream, sunscreen, and moisturizer). My husband also dislikes makeup. I find a tinted lip balm and a little powder to mattify my face goes a long way. If a little concealer and blush helps you feel l…	/r/RedPillWomen	30/05/21 05:17 AM
22	I’m confused- what makes women’s standards unreasonable? Right? The list was long-winded and wordy but the actual criteria were pretty fair and reasonable and not endless.	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/05/21 02:44 PM
2	Two rational but opposing hypothesis about beautiful women. I’ve seen the second more often than the first. Most really beautiful women I’ve met are also very nice people. I think people project their jealousy and bitterness and such onto beautiful women and say “oh they’re bland/they’re bitchy/they’re stupid” because of their own insecurities.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/05/21 02:24 AM
1	Virginity or modesty in women - seems like it’s both looked down upon and cherished I think many men fantasize that a woman will be a slut just for them. It’s a nice fantasy, not different from the common female fantasy that a cold or mean or jerk guy will be kind and loving to only them. In the real world there are more conservative and more liberal approaches to dating and sex and people seek out what they want in a partner. More conservative men seek our more conservative women and vie versa.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/05/21 02:17 AM
7	Virginity or modesty in women - seems like it’s both looked down upon and cherished Imagine having a dress code on your mind and typing it out like this. Is this the dean from from my HS? 😆	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/05/21 02:13 AM
1	There is NO correct way of approaching women without potentially coming off as creepy or intrusive I think a big, big part of this is most guys on subs such a PPD don’t seem good at reading social cues. Most women will signal that they’re open to you making a move. There’s not really a handbook for this, it’s more subconscious. And I’d add that in all fairness, there are women who are also bad at social cues who don’t send out proper signals and either end up never getting asked out or getting asked out by guys they aren’t into. I’ve only ever dated guys who I met irl. When they asked me out,…	/r/PurplePillDebate	17/05/21 07:50 PM
1	Female dating coaches are the most selfish people on Earth. Can you not sea-lion? I have plenty of examples but they’re quite personal. I don’t think I owe them to you. I’ve described my experience. I work in mental health and I’ve seen 5 different therapists over my lifetime.	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/05/21 02:07 PM
6	Female dating coaches are the most selfish people on Earth. I agree, my issue I’m describing is more that the therapists interpret unconditional positive regard as always validating the patient rather than simply as assuming the patient had good intent/is doing their best/is fundamentally good, if that makes sense. Sometimes when someone has good intent and is doin their best they still are hurting themselves or others and need to look critically at their thinking and actions, you know?	/r/PurplePillDebate	15/05/21 10:06 PM
8	Female dating coaches are the most selfish people on Earth. Yes and no, I’ve had trouble finding a therapist over the years because they tend to just over-validate and agree with me too much. Unconditional positive regard doesn’t mean you have to condone everything the client does but some take it that way.	/r/PurplePillDebate	15/05/21 06:20 PM
8	Female dating coaches are the most selfish people on Earth. Most “coaches” (like life coaches, dating coaches, etc) are scammers. They prey on desperate people, have no credentials, and imo are profiting from how disconnected we are from each other, and the lack of honesty between friends and family members. A friend who has a good marriage’s blunt advice or an older relative’s honest feedback is very useful. We have come to dislike any negative feedback or criticism and instead have begun to use others in our lives for validation. When pure validation i…	/r/PurplePillDebate	15/05/21 06:18 PM
4	CMV: Women who pair up only with taller, richer, prettier men than them, shouldn't be surprised they're expected to compensate by taking care of house chores, or overcompensate by being great partners. These kinds of posts are so sad...you really don’t believe people might just love each other and because of that make an attempt at treating each other fairly?	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/05/21 02:33 AM
3	Married women/post partum with children How old is your baby? I also gained not so much weight (around 25 lb) and tbh a lot of it is mental and not so reality based. We perceive these huge changes and others don't see them as a big deal at all. Nursing does give you crazy munchies. All I can say is keep healthy snacks around and switch to eating more small meals a day, that helped me keep the hunger in check. My research and my doctor confirmed that you need 300-400 extra calories per day for nursing if you're exclusively breastfeedin…	/r/RedPillWomen	10/05/21 05:17 PM
10	I'm not too sure what I truly want. I’m a nurse and used to live right next to a med school and 2 teaching hospitals, so while I obviously haven’t lived it from your perspective, I’ve seen a lot. Firstly, I got my education and then had a kid. My education was much shorter than yours will be, but I do kind of wish I’d been able to first establish myself in my job and then have had a baby. But that wasn’t really possible so it is what it is. But it has set me back in terms of getting experience and taking time off will make it hard…	/r/RedPillWomen	09/05/21 04:56 PM
5	Men are not made of porcelain It also depends what it’s about. Everyone has touchy areas that require extra sensitivity, so you also have to know your partner. My husband and I are both ADHD so we don’t take offense at all when we point out something we did that’s forgetful. But we give each other a lot of grace in those areas too.	/r/RedPillWomen	08/05/21 06:11 PM
11	Looks plays a massive role in men’s value in women. How can I work on this when I'm average-looking? I am also not a very agreeable girl. How old are you? I was more opinionated when I was younger and have generally chilled and become more understanding of others perspectives over time. Sometimes it’s just a maturity thing. I think the question “what’s the point in arguing about this?” Is relevant. Is the position held by the other person presenting any real harm to you? To those you love? Are you likely to change their view? If you start with asking questions to understand the other persons perspective, that’s a conversation, if …	/r/RedPillWomen	03/05/21 03:47 PM
2	Exercise I do a combo of bodyweight strength exercises--3 core, 3 legs, 3 arms. 3 sets of 10-20 each depending on the exercise (so like 3x2:00 planks, 3x15 V-ups, 3x20 mount climbers, 3x20 plyometric lunge, 3x1:30 wall sits, 3x20 single leg bridges, 3x10 push-ups, 3x10 triceps dips, 3x20 shoulder pinches) I change up the exercises, this is just an example, but keeping a simple formula helps me keep focused and motivated.	/r/RedPillWomen	29/04/21 04:08 AM
2	If being poor/low income is what makes a man a loser in women's eyes, is there a singular (near) universal thing that makes women a loser and undatable in men's eye's? Yes, seems they’re often unfairly lumped together though.	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/04/21 07:39 PM
3	If being poor/low income is what makes a man a loser in women's eyes, is there a singular (near) universal thing that makes women a loser and undatable in men's eye's? I mean over a certain age it’s a red flag if a woman hasn’t ever been married, so a lot of the more desirable partners will have kids. I think men need to accept that if they dork around in their 20s to early 30s, they won’t have good options when they decide to get more serious. Same as women. A divorced mom with a kid or two, decent job, stable, nice person, keeps fit, is a pretty darn good compromise once you’re older. Yeah, I’m sure most guys would like a never married 25 year old with no ki…	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/04/21 04:49 PM
1	if it is evil for women to even consider income wealth and career in a mate... Let’s put it this way, I’ve met plenty of men I’ve liked who would not have been good providers, so it was a no because having a family was a priority. I also met plenty of guys who were in a position to be a good provider but I didn’t like them/there wasn’t chemistry. So yes, women probably consider these factors of having a family is their goal, but you also want someone who you love and enjoy spending time with. I don’t think men are that different. If they were really attracted to and had ch…	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/04/21 03:48 PM
6	How can so many women be this delusional about men past the age of 30? I think what most single men over 30 don’t realize is that if they’re not wealthy, charismatic, or incredibly good looking, they’re in the same boat dating wise as most women over 30—the most desirable of the marriage-minded potential partners have already been “taken”‘and they will probably have to compromise in some way if they’re seeking a LTR/marriage	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/04/21 02:32 AM
1	Why does it seem like attractive people with the personality of an old, wet, dirty paper bag expect to find someone who is more than that? Imagine not believing there are naturally good looking women! I’m cracking up.	/r/PurplePillDebate	26/04/21 02:51 AM
1	Why does it seem like attractive people with the personality of an old, wet, dirty paper bag expect to find someone who is more than that? Idk most really beautiful women I’ve met are also really accomplished and educated, I think they felt they had to prove they were more than just their looks.	/r/PurplePillDebate	26/04/21 02:48 AM
10	For RPW who value themselves and are in a LTR, what are ways you try to show some effort in the relationship (small things) & how do you know it’s being valued or appreciated? The important caveat here for OP is that men want to feel appreciated when they provide, so definitely show gratitude and tell them how much you appreciate them and how good it makes you feel when they do xyz.	/r/RedPillWomen	25/04/21 11:51 PM
3	Feeling done He has OCD? Does he see a therapist? It sounds like you need individual and couples counseling. It’s not a quick fix but truly having an objective 3rd party is helpful. He either doesn’t fully comprehend how hurtful his behavior is or he does and doesn’t care. A therapist can help with the former, and if it’s the latter, you can re-negotiate terms for your marriage with a therapist together. I would also advise spiritual counseling with clergy if you are religious. I understand you don’t want to…	/r/RedPillWives	25/04/21 10:21 PM
4	Q4A: How do you treat your friends who are cheaters, if you have any? I judge them. In today’s culture it’s generally accepted to have multiple FWB or hookups. So why the need to deceive and cheat? If you don’t want an exclusive relationship, don’t enter one. It’s so entitled to cheat. I wouldn’t want to stay friends with someone who cheated and thought it was ok. If they did it once and knew it was a mistake and deeply regretted it, that’s different. But someone who cheats and doesn’t see an issue with it isn’t someone id want to be friends with. ETA: afaik none …	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/04/21 04:03 PM
1	Women aren't attracted to dad-bods. Women are unattracted to the expectations of fit men. It’s called farm strong! And yes, it’s definitely a thing, I know men and women who aren’t ripped but they do physical jobs and are strong as hell.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/04/21 03:11 AM
2	[Q4All] Why do women simultaneously like being "strong" women, but also enjoy being physically small, dainty and weaker than men? Same. I develop muscle crazy fast. But my dads side of the family includes pro athletes so I attribute it to just genetics. I have to be careful of how much weight I’m using and how much protein I’m eating or I do end up a bit bulky looking. I find focusing on core and body weight exercises plus using resistance as instructed by my PT is generally best for maintaining my strength without getting too jacked. I do a little weight training just for bone density tbh, way less than I used to, and my …	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/04/21 04:39 PM
2	Is it just an American thing to want a woman who doesn't work? Yes but you’ve also got a government that’s made loads of family friendly policies. Including free healthcare. In the US we pay for everything. Many people want a more traditional lifestyle but our government doesn’t prioritize families.	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/04/21 05:21 PM
3	Is it just an American thing to want a woman who doesn't work? No. I have noticed that more traditional men in the US do not want a partner who views their career as a huge part of their identity—but in general never working is a red flag and most people need 2 incomes anyway. In more traditional/conservative circles, women often do careers like nursing or teaching which offer some benefits to a family in exchange for lower salaries. A lot of the “I don’t want a woman who works” posts are downright delusional. The US offers no benefits to families and so mo…	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/04/21 05:14 PM
1	He wasn't a Chad/Fvckboy. She just wasn't interesting enough to keep his attention. I think you’re probably just in a liberal city. When I lived in a small Midwestern town, the other girls there were fun, had interests and hobbies, and were overall pretty nice. I met lots of interesting women I befriended at the gym and library. Girls I meet in bigger cities tend to think knowing which restaurants are good is a skill and that brunch is a hobby. (In case it’s not clear I am a woman)	/r/PurplePillDebate	22/04/21 12:26 AM
3	Feminine Etiquette There are many ways to express femininity. Burping and cursing are more external. There are, imo, more important relational and internal measures of femininity to address first. Do you tend to be domineering? Do you always want to be in charge? Do you seek to resolve differences first or do you go on the warpath first? Is it your way or the highway? To me those issues are the core of femininity, the rest is external. I know plenty of deer shootin’ truck drivin’ ribs n beer girls who make their m…	/r/RedPillWomen	21/04/21 05:20 PM