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lespetiteschoses Archive

View 3 posts and 375 comments by lespetiteschoses on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

I also think late 20s is a good time to get married rather than early 20s. I value those early years of independence that I had as a true adult making my own way in the world and sure, making tons of dating mistakes along the way. I completely disagree with the notion that women become irreparably damaged goods if they have a lot of dating history. Absolutely. If I'd married the kind of men I was chasing in my early 20s life would be pretty miserable right now. I think it takes most women at lea…
/r/RedPillWives15/08/18 03:51 AM
5

There's no solid definition, it varies from person to person. It counts to you, to other men it might not.
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/18 01:50 PM
2

That's all debatable but not at all the point that I was making. We could go back and forth all day about whether a blow job constitutes a notch in her bedpost or not, but it doesn't change the fact that she's had sex with one guy and BJs with 3. Calling her n-count one or calling it four is just semantics and not useful.
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/18 01:40 PM
2

Stop obsessing over a number, it really doesn't matter what you call it.
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/18 09:06 AM
3

Sure, but why would he talk at us about these "alpha women" if it's literally a one on a million (if that) type of person?
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 08:27 PM
2

Uh I don't think Elizabeth Holmes is a great example. She's a failure in both business and relationships. Broke up with her LTR when she fired him from her company.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 07:52 PM
3

Ok yeah fair enough. It's pretty rare that I need to actively "switch off" to avoid my masculine work-self spilling over to home life, maybe I'm just lucky :)
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 07:22 PM
7

Yes I love all of this :) Especially these two: Make lots of friends who have varied interests and lifestyles. Say yes to fun activities. Concerts, weekends camping, avante garde plays. Expose yourself to as many different things as you can to help you refine the type of lifestyle and husband you are looking for. I think having broad experiences while you're young really does help you figure out who you are and what you want in life/marriage. I know quite a few girls who stuck to what they knew …
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 07:16 PM
3

It's not that difficult really. I'm sure you don't speak to your LTR the same way you talk to the navy guys? Same kinda thing. My husband inspires that kinda softness and femininity in me, so it's actually pretty easy to from Mrs big boss lady at work to sweet doting wife when I get home. I brought my husband along to a work function once and he was so bemused seeing me in that role. He found it really funny and cute that all my (male and female) co-workers were so deferential to me.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 07:06 PM
1

I didn't realize RPW advised rolling over and submitting to every sorry excuse of a man who wanders in here.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 05:46 PM
7

I'm not sure why you posted all this at me. Is it somehow related to what I said?
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 03:48 PM
1

Take your amused mastery elsewhere. It's contrived and boring.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 07:49 AM
1

I don't want to debate with men over Rollo's post and a women's sub. That's not why I come here
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 05:34 AM
11

I can only speak for myself, not the other women, but I think that he uses a ridiculous amount of words to say something very simple, and in this case wrong. But again, I didn't post to complain about his "essay" or the fact that he's allowed to keep posting them. I was just pointing out that women are indeed capable of holding valid opinions that are not in line with Rollo's.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 05:20 AM
11

You are not disagreeing with anything specific he has to say. You are disagreeing with his right to post here. I said nothing about his right to post here. I took issue with you dismissing the women's response to his post as emotional. The women clearly aren't interested in what he's said here (and I agree with them on this, but that's beside the point). He's posted this in two other male oriented pill subs, why don't you go discuss it there rather than complaining that the women in redpillwomen…
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 04:47 AM
21

He posted the same over at TRP and MRP, why don't you go discuss it there with other men rather than coming here and trying to convince the girls to talk to you about it?
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 03:31 AM
17

Why does every post you make sound like you're addressing the pope. I don't think Rollo is anywhere near as good a thinker or writer as he does, but that's not the point. Obviously the guys like him, and that's fine. To say that the women here who disagree with his ideas are shortsighted or simply thinking with emotion is just insulting and superficial. Just because you don't understand someone's objection to the post doesn't mean that the objection is unwarranted.
/r/RedPillWomen13/08/18 02:11 AM
2

You said you're on a hormonal treatment and your sex drive became a problem after that? Why are you on hormones? Is it something you'll have to be on forever? I would talk to your doctor and tell them the effect that they've had. They may be able to change your dosage so that you're able to control your drive a bit better.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 11:27 AM
6

I didn't say it was healthy or normal. I said that experimenting alone is. Stop repeating that she was molested as a child. You have no idea why she's doing what she is.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 04:28 AM
7

No, you assumed she'd been molested and went from there. You could have asked her if that's something that had happened and given advice based on her response.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 03:22 AM
7

Hi OP. Can I ask what it is that you get out of posting nudes online? Is it purely a sexual release, or do you enjoy the attention that comes with it? Do you feel part of it is the taboo of rebelling against your religion? Does your religion place a lot of shame on sex and sexual pleasure? It's not a great habit to indulge in regardless, and I hope you haven't included your face in any of these pictures? I'd suggest to explore your sexuality without shame, but alone and without taking pictures. …
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 03:21 AM
10

I'm not offended, just rolling my eyes at your silly assumptions and need to prove yourself as oh so edgy. It's juvenile.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 03:17 AM
10

I've seen it in plenty of girls who were raised in overbearing religious homes. Making assumptions like this isn't useful.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 03:12 AM
9

Oh for heaven's sake enough with the internet psychology.
/r/RedPillWomen10/08/18 03:09 AM
14

Then you're fine. You're specifically targeting a subset of men who value and expect virginity. I'd suggest actively dating for marriage through your church.
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/18 11:17 PM
5

What kind of man are you looking for? Are you religious?
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/18 12:03 PM
6

How old are you?
/r/RedPillWomen09/08/18 07:51 AM
1

For many (I'd guess most) women, marriage is far more than a legal technicality.
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/18 10:29 PM
2

And while their fear of divorce has some basis in reality (particularly for those who watched it in their families as my husband did), they are terrified of losing what they have worked to build - which is itself an emotion justified by statistics. Absolutely. My husband also came from a broken family, and takes marriage and his role as a husband very seriously as a result. In his case, his dad was objectively at fault (sleeping around, abusive to the family, etc) so a lot of what drives him in …
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/18 10:05 PM
1

My husband's esteem of me certainly changed after marriage. I know girlwithabike had the same experience. My husband told me that having me as his wife made him feel more invested in my happiness and safety, and like I was an extension of him rather than a girlfriend he enjoyed having around.
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/18 09:56 PM
2

This is a wonderful explanation and I agree with it 100%. Men will always look for the logical reason that women want to marry, and can't seem to accept that it isn't based in logic. We are creatures of emotion, and that's ok. That's femininity, and it isn't something men will ever understand on a personal level. That feeling of ultimate emotional security is a big, big deal, and even if it isn't something logical with a mathematical series of pros and cons, it is still real. I always shake my h…
/r/RedPillWomen08/08/18 08:33 PM
4

Oh dear, I'm sorry you're going through this. It must be so stressful. I am personally against abortion in situations where the mother is not at risk, not for religious reasons, but because I feel that life is such a beautiful and special thing that I couldn't imagine ending it (even if it's just a fetus at this point). It is true that having a child now will make dating in the future more complicated, but as other posters have said it isn't a death sentence. Single mothers can and do go on to d…
/r/RedPillWomen31/07/18 05:52 AM
1

he has a habit of drive-by dropping his awful essays on this sub and never sticking around to engage on them. he's just trying to direct traffic to his web$ite. i believe the other sub banned him over this and i can see why.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/18 02:25 AM
5

We can actually choose a different reality for ourselves by virtue of what we choose to focus on. If all women are like that, so it is. After a traumtizing experience with the opposite sex or several, its normal and healthy to go through that rage. What isn't healthy is to keep re-living it by seeking evidence to sustain it. very well said. if you spend all your time consuming this stuff, of course all women are going to look like that. it's not healthy.
/r/RedPillWomen24/07/18 11:42 PM
4

A man who cheats is generally filling a need that isn't being filled at home. Maybe he isn't getting enough sex, maybe his wife doesn't listen to him, maybe she doesn't respect him, maybe something else. There's usually a specific need that isn't being filled and so he looks outside the marriage to find it. The structure of the marriage itself, remains intact. There are plenty of men who cheat simply because they enjoy variety and don't have the self control to not pursue that. Regardless of the…
/r/RedPillWomen24/07/18 04:19 AM
10

Do you think that a 35 year old woman is as attractive to men as a 25 year old woman? How about a 45 year old? 55? 65? Is there any point at which a woman becomes sexually undesirable to men or is it all just revenge fantasy? Is a 65 year old man as attractive as a 35 year old man? Is his dating pool going to be the same size?
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 04:41 PM
9

So running with your definition, if the wall separates hideous women from everyone else, and if men are sexually attracted to everyone on the good side of the wall, then logic follows that all a woman really needs to do looks-wise is be not hideous? Why would she maximize her looks if sexual attraction is a binary switch of pre/post wall? If it isn't a binary switch, then how does this differ from men's declining looks as they age?
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 04:38 PM
10

What is the difference between "the wall" and common sense then? Why coin a term and write stumbling essays about it if it boils down to "it's smart to use your looks and fertility while you have them"? I agree with the other poster that it reads like a revenge fantasy for men who are upset about a SMP that favors women.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 02:05 PM
1

Is this an attempt at English?
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 10:29 AM
19

Yep. I'm not sure who the target audience of this post is, but I don't see its value beyond instilling discomfort in the women here. We all know our most beautiful years are on a timer. Let's work at extending those years while cultivating our timeless traits.
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 09:11 AM
22

And while other attributes like strength, character, and success may be more valued by women seeking men, they absolutely play a role in men seeking women too. Otherwise, the ideal mate for men would be vapid Barbies and that's just not the real world. This is a really interesting point, and though you'll hear guys on the internet claiming that a woman's achievements/smarts mean nothing to them, in the real world I see something very different. High value men do not go after the vapid hottie for…
/r/RedPillWomen20/07/18 06:49 AM
7

If marriage is important to you and he's clearly stated he doesn't want to ever marry, then why are you trying to save this? Are you hoping he'll change his mind? You've obviously got issues to work on with yourself, but I think you should consider if you're compatible with this man before going any further with him.
/r/RedPillWomen19/07/18 01:33 AM
3

Ignore this. If phone sex is against your religion, then it's against your religion. I agree with the other posters that you do not sound compatible with this man, and that you should reconsider the engagement. A difficult break up now will be SO much easier than a divorce down the road or a miserable life together.
/r/RedPillWomen17/07/18 05:18 AM
8

You're going to need to chill a bit on your requirements and your punishments if you want a happy marriage. She's making an effort to meet your agreement, life throws us curve balls. If you can't manage 3 minutes on your own without coming down on her you're going to struggle when something actually goes wrong.
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/18 07:08 AM
2

you're being downvoted because you're wrong.
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/18 12:50 AM
5

actually in this case she can control what he does - by reporting him to her boss. men making overtly sexual comments to minors at work is a part of the "mating dance" that we should absolutely be shutting down.
/r/RedPillWomen11/07/18 12:47 AM
5

I'm saying that the points you've raised represent a vanishingly small percentage of the conversation that happens on TRP. I see what you're trying to do, but I don't think you're being intellectually honest in picking out these nice little sound bites in an effort to convince women that TRP are on their side. The sexual strategy of most TRP posters is diametrically opposed to that of RPW, and that's ok. Trying to argue the opposite is just dishonest. The men of TRP do not have our back.
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/18 04:52 AM
7

Why ask for our thoughts if just to tell us they're wrong? The fact is that the overwhelming majority of conversation on TRP is not at all in line with what you've said. Do you not agree that male and female sexual strategy are at odds?
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/18 04:40 AM
9

I think it resembles maybe 0.1% of the discourse on TRP, and conveniently ignores all of the aspects of TRP that actively work in perfect opposition to the female sexual strategy. I think it's intellectually lazy and insulting to the women here to cherry pick points and rebrand them into fluffy truisms that sound good.
/r/RedPillWomen04/07/18 04:12 AM
1

You're his booty call. You're overthinking the whole thing - you need to cut him off and find someone who wants the same things as you.
/r/RedPillWomen25/06/18 09:11 PM
2

You completely misinterpreted what I was saying.
/r/RedPillWomen25/06/18 08:42 PM
2

I meant in terms of the problems she's brought here. Obviously it's not all that matters in a relationship. His weird Asperger behavior doesn't matter if she's attracted to him.
/r/RedPillWomen25/06/18 08:20 PM
22

Are you attracted to him? Does he turn you on? This is all that really matters. Women have a very sensitive "weird" meter. We're very good at picking up on social incompetence because we've evolved to find a man of good social standing to be attractive. Social skills are important in choosing a good mate and ultimately mixing our genes with, so there's a good reason we're usually turned off by socially clumsy men.
/r/RedPillWomen25/06/18 11:13 AM
10

I agree that it's mostly a concept coined by men out of insecurity. Most women who break up with a high value man will be heartbroken for a while, and then carry on to have normal, healthy relationships when they're ready. Being sad about a breakup is normal and not "alpha widowhood". Most women deal with breakups just fine after the normal mourning period.
/r/RedPillWomen18/06/18 02:52 AM
2

Ugh gross
/r/RedPillWives17/06/18 09:18 PM
1

If a woman has a choice between a great partner and and man who has the potential to be a great partner, she shouldn't take the risk. This is obvious.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/18 09:17 PM
18

The mods actually messaged me after that exchange to suggest I act "more submissively" toward that male poster. I like that RPWives teaches that your submission should stop at your own man, and not "men" in general.
/r/RedPillWives17/06/18 09:01 PM
3

here?
/r/RedPillWives17/06/18 08:41 PM
1

I am really hurt I am also deeply crushed Does he even like me? It leaves me feeling numb towards him It was such a complete turnoff How can I come back from feeling so repulsed by him now?
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/18 02:16 AM
1

so the point of MRP is to get sex out of your wife, even if she is deathly unhappy and hates you?
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/18 01:47 AM
1

She's repulsed by him and considering leaving. It's not working.
/r/RedPillWomen17/06/18 01:15 AM
10

She is full term with his child. Of course the sex would have dropped off. That is no excuse to humiliate her and flirt with other women.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 11:33 AM
6

She already has children with him
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 10:44 AM
1

He needs to understand that the way he's applying TRP/MRP is not working. He probably sees your distress as shit testing so will double down on it. He is doing it all wrong and it's about to destroy your marriage. If I were you I would tell him clearly and directly that you are at the end of your tether and that unless he starts treating you like a wife, you'll leave. And you need to mean it. I don't usually like ultimatums, but I don't think he understands that the way he's implementing MRP is …
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 08:05 AM
1

I remember your previous post about this man, and I'm not at all surprised. This is a man who was using his unborn child as a bargaining chip to extract porn star sex from his pregnant wife. I'm not sure what you were expecting. He's trying to dread you, sweetheart, and it's working. I'm not sure on what planet dreading your full term wife is a good idea. It looks like he's taking MRP canon and applying it with a shotgun all over your marriage. Your problems run deeper than flirting at a party. …
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 05:06 AM
9

I would never date a man who visits TRP/MRP. If he has so much potential why isn't he improving himself? Why does he need a woman to "fix" him? I'm glad it worked out for you, but dating the "fixer upper" is a bad bet almost always.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 12:47 AM
7

Yup, even with a great woman most losers stay losers. Not a wise investment.
/r/RedPillWomen16/06/18 12:03 AM
12

/u/cercieness do not marry a man because he "has potential". It is a terrible idea to marry a man in the hopes that he will change into something better. Some men can level up, but there's also a good chance you end up stuck with the heavy drinker who can't take care of himself.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 10:30 PM
4

It is absolutely possible for 80% of men on OkCupid to be below average. You're looking at a small subset of men that doesn't necessarily reflect the norm.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 10:26 PM
9

What makes you think your boyfriend won't become that venomous snake?
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 05:27 AM
5

Honey you are a woman with agency, not a venomous snake.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 04:31 AM
5

I can't believe people are entertaining this as an actual option.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/18 04:30 AM
2

I think that taking in a bunch of unrelated kids is more virtuous than caring for your own. Raising your own kids is the bare minimum, bringing in stranger's kids is something else altogether! I don't think it's weird that his friends would consider that more "noble" than having and raising your own kids.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 11:05 PM
1

You really don't see the difference between caring for your own children that you chose to create and are genetically related to, and bringing in other people's unwanted children?
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 10:40 PM
2

Read the other responses, they showed her some books
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 10:22 PM
15

/u/beat_of_rice ignore these shaming tactics. You're not silly for having your preferences, there are plenty of great men who are fully satisfied without being dominated or pegged in the bedroom. Not wanting to fuck your man in the ass is not going to ruin your bond with him. Just find a man who is compatible with you.
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 02:31 PM
9

rather than go down a rabbit hole and back out lol
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 01:59 PM
5

Where does she mention hypergamy?
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 01:58 PM
10

Hey, don't worry too much about it :) sexual compatibility is a big thing, and you want to make sure you're on the same page as any future partners. It's not your fault if you're not into that stuff, you're better off finding someone who has the right sexual personality for you. I could never peg a guy. I've been asked and it was an immediate turn off so I know what you mean. It is a very submissive position for him to be in and for many girls that's a no. You don't need to learn to like these t…
/r/RedPillWomen14/06/18 01:55 PM
3

where are all the good men? certainly not over there! :P
/r/RedPillWives14/06/18 02:04 AM
2

You're welcome :)
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/18 02:00 AM
1

Try reading the post before you respond with garbage.
/r/RedPillWomen13/06/18 12:33 AM
25

If it does come up, and you do feel like you are ready to have sex with the man, I would simply be honest with him. Just say that you've been intimate with a couple of guys, but have never had actual sex.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 10:48 PM
3

The word has a contextual meaning that I quoted. You don't get to just invent meanings for existing words. I'm checking out of this thread, it's an absolute waste of time.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 04:02 PM
4

Yeah, you're wrong. I won't waste my time explaining it to you again, but the word hypergamy has a meaning. I copied it's meaning from the TRP glossary. It involves sexual strategy (which IS mate selection for a female, not just getting laid). It does not involve provisioning in the absence of a mate in any form. You're just making things up to suit your narrative.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 03:24 PM
3

You're preaching to the choir. No child should be born out of wedlock. Loneliness was talking about the breakdown of marriage and it's causes specifically. Single parenthood is a result of that, among other things. It is not the cause.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:57 PM
3

everything feminism does is trying to provision women without having to depend on men This is true, but it is not hypergamy. The term hypergamy has only ever been used in the context of a relationship with a man. Wanting to get in on the work force is not hypergamy. Accepting welfare is not hypergamy. No matter how many words you and /u/loneliness-inc write trying to change the definition to suit you, that's just not how it works. Words have meanings, and you're using the word wrong.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:53 PM
2

that would all be fine, but whatever his intentions are he's filling the "gaps" with inaccurate information which is not helpful.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 09:03 AM
8

Well he's not presenting history, or politics, or even basic RP theory accurately. To be frank, he has no idea what he's talking about. Even if his intentions are good, how much can women expect to gain from it?
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 08:29 AM
3

Exactly. If I had married the type of guys I was dating in my teens I would have been absolutely miserable. I met my husband when we were both 26 and it was perfect imo. He'd figured out what he wanted to do with life and was past the sleeping around phase, I was mature enough to be able to recognize a good man.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 07:20 AM
3

Thanks /u/KittenLoves_ :)
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 05:52 AM
7

I'm not trying to convince you of anything. You asked what I thought about your posts and I told you.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 04:53 AM
17

Ok, I'll put it here, as you requested. Mods can delete if they find it inappropriate. I see a pattern in your posts where under the guise of sharing "basic knowledge" you essentially keep on repeating the same "women are awful, poor men have to deal with them" narrative. It goes beyond RP theory, and is often way off the mark. You seem to be someone who takes pleasure in watching women fail (WAATGM), and your participation here reads as someone who enjoys taking women down a peg, rather than tr…
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 04:35 AM
3

I think you understand what I'm getting at, and you'll just deny. There's no point discussing it.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 03:24 AM
3

You state all those things as if they're facts rather than your personal feelings. Even so, your definition of hypergamy has become so mangled now that nobody has any idea what you're talking about.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 03:23 AM
6

You've seen what kind of pattern? i suspect my comments will be removed if i go down that road so will just leave it there.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:42 AM
4

no, not in other words "being unhappy with what she has". the stretch you're making is just too far and going in this direction strips words of their functional meaning. To discard the old thing you're unhappy with in favor of the new one is a function of hypergamy. Is a man who quits his job for a better paying, more prestigious one displaying hypergamy? Would you call him hypergamous for discarding his old job that he's unhappy with and taking a better one?
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:39 AM
5

i'm not salty, sorry you read it that way :)
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:27 AM
8

Because hypergamy is the endless desire for more and more, better and better. no, it's not. hypergamy is a sexual strategy whereby women seek out the best mate possible. From the TRP glossary: Hypergamy – The instinctual urge for women to seek out the best alpha available. This is marked by maximizing rejection (therefore women are the selective gender). A woman will vet her alpha through various shit tests to ensure his "health" on the alpha scale. She is conditioned to recognize a declining al…
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:16 AM
8

i think you should ask /u/loneliness-inc about that. i strongly disagree with his point that sexual strategies like women's hypergamy flow into other aspects of life, causing the desire to vote or have a job. but hey, he's the 'endorsed contributor' around here ¯\(ツ)/¯
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:11 AM
9

yes, i've read your posts, and i've seen the pattern. i can't find a solid point in this post beyond "women = bad, men = good".
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 02:01 AM
7

the total breakdown of marriage hadn't occurred until the sixties i assume you're referring to the introduction of no-fault divorce? this is a product of second-wave feminism, but i still fail to understand how you're making a link between female nature/hypergamy = feminism = breakdown of marriage. so much of your post is incorrect/poorly worded that i'm not sure what point you're even trying to make.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 01:57 AM
9

it's historically and politically inaccurate and feels more like a cheap "female nature = bad, male nature = wonderful" post to me.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 01:12 AM
6

It was only the second wave who descended into sexual promiscuity. This just isn't true. The 1920s was a period of sexual liberation and hedonism. Flappers, film, the Femme Fatale, booze, adultery was rife. Have you heard of the Petting Parties of the 20s? Promiscuity was around long before the second wave, and women had plenty of outlets for their hypergamy. In the 1950s a third of men and a quarter of women admit to adultery. Divorce wasn't as common, but the pre-second wave world was far from…
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 01:01 AM
2

yeah there certainly comes a point for both men and women where, barring religious belief, being a virgin is a red flag.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 12:17 AM
5

Whatever she and her partner are happy with. N-count is important to some men, and not important to others. Some men who care about it want it to be zero, some prefer a highly sexual woman. It's all very personal.
/r/RedPillWomen12/06/18 12:08 AM
19

Only once women found themselves living the most privileged lifestyle known to man up until that point did they start demanding more and more. The reason they began demanding for more is because hypergamy has no ceiling. It's an endless desire for more and more. Hypergamy is a female sexual strategy, it is not any conceivable push for more rights/privilege made by a woman. You don't call it hypergamy when a woman applies for promotion at work, or when she complains that she's mistreated. It exis…
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/18 11:52 PM
3

How is your vague anecdote any more encompassing than one woman's personal experience?
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/18 10:12 AM
1

My question is to you women who have been the third wheel or “unicorn” of the threesome, why did you do it? Did you regret it more than any regretful one night stand? What mentality does a women have to agree to something like this? I've been the unicorn, and it really wasn't more complicated than being someone who enjoys sex. Some women indulge in sexual experiences, some don't. It doesn't mean that the prudish women don't want to do it, and it doesn't mean that the promiscuous women are "damag…
/r/RedPillWomen11/06/18 09:49 AM
9

I'd avoid at all costs. Good mental health is a must for me.
/r/RedPillWomen10/06/18 07:24 AM
5

yeah, we're just not going to agree on this. This FR is descriptive- good girl game inspired exclusivity ... We're technically not exclusive, but I've dropped my other plates just out of lack of desire for them now this is not what exclusivity looks like.
/r/RedPillWomen10/06/18 02:26 AM
5

Your anecdote is also a sample size of 1
/r/RedPillWomen10/06/18 01:27 AM
5

Through good Girl Game, the woman described in OP inspired the man to voluntarily give up his other prospects, BEFORE she invoked her female prerogative to define the terms of the relationship. From the sound of it, him offering exclusivity without her explicitly demanding it is the next step of this relationship. That's great, inspire commitment. That's our job. But, He has not "offered" exclusivity, he's stopped seeing his other plates. This is an important distinction for a woman. Until he's …
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/18 07:23 PM
1

agree to disagree :)
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/18 01:44 PM
3

I always took the "don't clarify exclusivity" idea to be an attempt at getting towards "don't negotiate commitment" clarifying exclusivity is just that - asking him "are we or are we not exclusive?" (in more elegant words). negotiating commitment is taking a man who you know is not as gung-ho about it as you are, and trying to get the answer that you want out of him. I think having to request commitment or exclusivity well in to the relationship you're getting the two mixed up. asking "are we ex…
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/18 01:02 PM
3

i think you're probably right that the comment is chest beating, but then what is the point of sharing it if the meaning is lost? i believe that the point here is that whisper is using this anecdote in an attempt to reiterate his "don't have the talk" spiel. clarifying exclusivity (i.e. having the talk) is completely different to negotiating commitment, and i don't see anyone advocating for the latter. i don't know why people keep bringing that up. if he's not clarified his exclusivity to her, t…
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/18 12:46 PM
17

yeah cool, but "technically not exclusive" isn't good enough for me, or any high value women that i know. "technically not exclusive" is not a prize.
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/18 08:48 AM
3

uh-huh, spot on this is why we should be sceptical when men tell us the talk is socially retarded, don't do it who is that advice actually benefitting?
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/18 08:34 AM
5

You mention drinking a couple of times, do you think he has a problem with alcohol? You need to have a very honest conversation about this with him. If there's something he's unhappy about at home he needs to tell you so you have a chance to fix it. Hiding in the car and leaving you confused is not helping anyone. What's the point in being in a relationship with him if he's never around?
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 11:40 AM
10

Thanks, but I asked OP. This isn't helpful. Edit: the downvotes aren't helpful either but go nuts.
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 06:31 AM
12

That fact that he pushes for it even when he knows he'll be hurting you is a bit of a worry in my opinion. Sex is important, of course, but unless you're both into it then 3 times a day is excessive. Sex should be something you both cherish and look forward to, if you're being pressured into painful sex you're going to end up resenting sex altogether. You need to decide how much sex you can realistically have (and enjoy) and have a serious conversation about it with him. If you can come to a com…
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 06:17 AM
2

Have you told him that having sex 3 times a day leaves you sore?
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 05:33 AM
3

If you're 90% sure that you don't want to do it, there's no point bringing it up with him and muddying the waters. I agree with you.
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 02:24 AM
12

Yes this is weird. Do you fight? Have you had issues recently? Have you asked him why he hangs out in the car rather than in the house with his family? How long has it gone on for? You say he comes in to put "his" kid to bed, are you the stepmother? Are you married to him? Sorry for all the questions. It's a really odd situation and more info will help.
/r/RedPillWomen07/06/18 02:07 AM
3

What should a woman do if she has a 'high' SMV ("looks good for 35 or 40") the man has a high SMV (due to looks but with heavy impacts from ambition, success and 'game') - but they are completely unequal in their RMV with each other??? Does he seem happy with you in general? Your RMVs may not be as mismatched as you think :) Remember that men and women get their RMV in different ways. While he's done well professionally, I suspect that you've always been around to support and encourage him, yes?…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 11:37 AM
6

your husband sounds like an incredible man. truly. that kind of devotion to a woman is exactly why we do all of this (all of "this" being RPW, self improvement, etc). gaining the love and protection of a man like that is a beautiful thing, and i'm lucky enough to know that first hand :) we're very lucky ladies to have that kind of love. i understand this feeling of wanting to give more than you know how to. just being overwhelmed with love and not knowing how you could ever compete with that sel…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 10:06 AM
2

i think it's just a coincidence. maybe the pretty girls don't feel the need to broadcast their sex lives.
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 02:43 AM
4

Emotions aren't rational. Amen sister
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 01:03 AM
6

Yeah, I jumped on that a little hard lol. I was mainly responding to the "This can mean putting your sexual/emotional needs on pause while you let her and your husband explore each other sexually." Falling into a mindset of "her feelings are just as important as ours and we all need to mind ourselves so as not to hurt her" is super dangerous. If it's possible to keep everyone happy, then of course you should aim for that. But if a situation comes up where that's not possible, then this extra wom…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 01:00 AM
10

You have no idea how you will feel until it happens. Whatever mental preparation you do and however you think you will feel, you simply cannot know the reality of it until it actually happens. This. Every woman who's considering a threesome because "I'm not the jealous type" needs to tattoo this to the inside of her eyelids. Some women can handle it just fine, some women will fall to pieces and ruin their marriage over it. Unfortunately there's no way of knowing which type of woman you are until…
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 12:35 AM
5

Also OP needs to consider the feelings of the other woman (“unicorn”). Keep in mind she is a real person with real feelings, not a sex toy for you to pump and dump. This can mean putting your sexual/emotional needs on pause while you let her and your husband explore each other sexually. I couldn't disagree more. Your priority is your marriage, not some strange woman you've brought into bed. You should be protecting yourself, your husband and your marriage at all costs, and if that means booting …
/r/RedPillWomen06/06/18 12:30 AM
2

Have you slept together? Have you discussed exclusivity and whether you're in a relationship yet, or is it still casual? Has he had any other emotional outbursts since you've known him?
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:56 PM
1

I think this is a different issue. Being a bit anxious about uncertainty in life is normal, but you're right that asking your husband over and over about something is not helpful. I would say to look at your husband's track record. Does he usually take good care of your family and make smart decisions? Trust that he will continue to do so :)
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:53 PM
11

You don't take advantage of his vulnerability to get what you want. He's all over the place right now, he needs time and space to figure himself out.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:43 PM
4

How long has he been out of his marriage, and how long have you been dating for? I would probably assume he's still an emotional wreck from his divorce, and take some space while he straightens himself out. The alternative is that he's just overly clingy and emotional, which doesn't bode well for a relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:42 PM
29

Full disclosure - I've had and enjoyed threesomes before. I don't think they're always a bad thing, but the chance of it bringing up negative feelings in a marriage is huge, and the effects of those feelings can be nuclear. I think you're coming to the idea of a threesome for all the wrong reasons. Not being able to think of a better gift for your husband is not a good reason to bring another woman into your bed. After 10 years of monogamous marriage, I think this is likely to bring up more prob…
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 10:54 PM
3

Men who chose not to marry/have children have always existed, and no one's ever paid them much mind. The only difference nowadays is that they've given themselves an internet presence and a name. I wouldn't worry about them.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 10:33 PM
1

Ok yep that makes sense :) I thought that it was a more pressing concern and was wondering how you were so chill about it lol. I'm glad you two are on the same page with things anyway!
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 12:10 PM
1

I'm curious how your partner responded when you told him that you'd like to get married one day? Did he express agreeance? How long would you have waited around without a proposal if it hadn't come up?
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 11:02 AM
6

I liked the sentiment of the /u/kittenloves_ "say it once" post, but personally would have handled it differently. I prefer an approach of telling my husband my problem, and agreeing together on a solution. This allows him to solve it in the way that he wants to, and clears up any "will he or won't he" ambiguity on my end. In her case I would have explained my anxiety over the future and asked him what he thought a good solution would be. I would have offered the information that my preferred so…
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 10:38 AM
3

yuck. go away.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 04:51 AM
13

He is also perfectly fine with being just a friend with me. On the last day of school, he had gotten me a boquet of flowers oh, honey... Do you ladies have a physical preference when it comes to men? I'm not super specific with my "type", but being sexually and physically attracted to him is a must. I tend to prefer tall, lean white men. Definitely not overweight, and I don't mind muscular as long as it's more "I lift logs for fun" muscular and less "I take roids and live in the gym" muscular. H…
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 04:46 AM
1

Considering you post on /r/braincels, I get the feeling you're not in a position to be picky.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 04:38 AM
2

Thanks for linking your blog. I've found this exchange really interesting so will be diving into your posts when I have some time.
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 03:49 AM
13

I think it's dishonest, emotionally immature and manipulative. Why bother being in a relationship with someone if they are only "temporary" if you lead your partner to believe you're dating them seriously, then yeah it's a dick move to just keep them around for now. i don't think there's anything inherently "wrong" with dating casually though, if that's what both parties are into. obviously if you're looking for a serious relationship and he considers you only a placeholder, things won't end wel…
/r/RedPillWomen05/06/18 02:01 AM
–

I think she's asking the question because the line has been crossed.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 02:12 AM
–

It's very true for me. Once love comes along other men become more or less invisible to me.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 02:09 AM
6

Yeah, I can see the answer you're looking for and I don't really like "gotcha" posts. If you have a point to make about showing appreciation to your man, I think you'll get a better response just saying so. I naturally show a lot of appreciation and affection and sympathy toward my husband, so it's not something that he needs to fish for with subtext. This is why in the many years we've been together I've never received a text like the one you describe.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 01:50 AM
4

This is very cryptic and not helpful. I know my husband very well, and he appreciates when I ask what I can do to help him.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 01:35 AM
1

No, I don't see it as a bid for sympathy. I wouldn't know what to make of it, which is why I would ask what he wanted me to do in this situation. I would respond with sympathy because that's just in my nature, I'd do that for anyone who messaged me with a complaint.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 01:28 AM
3

My husband has never in the time that I've known him messaged me simply to complain about something, so this is an odd hypothetical. If he wants me to do something, he'll ask me directly. If he's just venting and looking for sympathy, well he doesn't do that so I wouldn't know. If I did for some reason receive that text from him I would show sympathy and appreciation and ask him if there was something I could do to help.
/r/RedPillWomen04/06/18 01:20 AM
4

What power balance did she destroy? He wasn't ready to commit, what do you suggest she should have done?
/r/RedPillWomen02/06/18 12:28 AM
–

I've never personally been in that situation luckily but have friends who were. In one case it was salvageable, and in one case it was not. In the relationship that survived, they both had been under a huge amount of pressure, death in the family, sick child, etc. During a bad argument he lashed out. It happened once, he immediately realized the mistake he'd made, and was ashamed and apologetic. It was tough but they were able to move past it. In the case where it didn't work out, he was a viole…
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 10:55 PM
5

Possibly. Anecdotally though, my husband and I are both high n. I know some couples have different views on this, but we're both very social, sexual people and i would have found it unattractive if he'd asked.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 06:45 PM
1

I don't know. I just know that if man made a big deal out of knowing mine I'd be very turned off. Like a visceral reaction.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 02:54 PM
3

Near Christmastime I boil a pot of water with orange peel, cinnamon, cloves, etc and it fills the house with a beautiful smell. You could easily replace the spices with whichever ones you prefer. My husband also comments on the smell when I cook hearty savory pies :)
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 02:24 PM
3

I find men who are concerned with n count to be excessively neurotic and jealous, which are very feminine traits in my mind. It's a huge turn off for me when I come across a man like that.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 02:17 PM
6

I have already made it known to him my insecurities about being an ethnic minority, growing up as an immigrant, with parents coming from a poor culture, and not being as successful as his Ivy League friends. He claims it is not an issue, but to me I don't see how it could NOT be an issue. Stop this.
/r/RedPillWomen01/06/18 12:12 AM
9

Just because your exes ended up with white girls doesn't mean your race had anything to do with it. Minorities are called that because there's less of them. It's just more likely they'll end up with a white girl if there's more of them around. It sounds to me like you're dead set on your race and background being a disability in your dating life and that's going to be a self fulfilling prophecy if you're not careful.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 11:58 PM
2

so you've tried going after these men and failed?
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 11:37 PM
1

weird, i've never dated a guy who was into video games beyond his teenage years
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 11:32 PM
2

you're right, i re-read our exchange and you did not. i took your "i apologize for this mess" after i pointed out how you were carrying on to be in agreement.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 11:25 PM
9

it's a very specific and often contradictory list of requirements that you've got there, and something's got to give on your end. in the other post you referenced, it was quite a simple case of i'm upper class, he's lower class, we don't mesh so well. in your case you're looking for someone who: wants traditional, conservative roles at home wants you to continue your challenging and passionate liberal career appreciates you artistic mentality fits in well with your family who is somehow old mone…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 11:17 PM
2

What do you mean you're sophisticated but with working class manners?
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 10:38 PM
9

Hi there, I think it was me that made that comment you're speaking about. It sounds like you've certainly got a lot of conflicting culture going on :) you may need to have a think about what the most important areas of compatibility are and be prepared to make some compromises in the other areas. You don't want to date your exact copy anyway! From reading your post, it sounds like the most fundamental things for you are: The traditional home life/gender dynamic Your worldly artistic life I think…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 10:02 PM
2

Yeah for sure! I asked her about a million questions in her "I come from a very different place" thread and it was morbidly fascinating. Very glad to live where I do!
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 09:45 PM
1

I'm absolutely not giving anything a pass. Just pointing out the vast cultural difference.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 08:44 PM
1

Oh yeah she was totally being pig headed about it, which I pointed out to her and she admit to. Not making any excuses for her, just think it's interesting to take her very different background into account.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 08:43 PM
2

not at all. a couple more questions if you don't mind. are you married yet? if not, have your parents suggested any possible husbands to you? you said that almost everyone is a virgin until marriage, what would happen if it came out that a woman or man was not a virgin? would they still be able to find a spouse? what if it came out later once they were already married? would the consequences be different for men and women?
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 02:23 AM
-1

i'm sure it's a little more nuanced than that.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 01:35 AM
7

yup. while it's very romantic, the Aladdin/Princess Jasmine dynamic usually doesn't work out in real life.
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 12:50 AM
5

i don't think anyone doubts that you believe what you are saying. you must try to understand that you are talking with a group of people are predominantly western and do relationships in a western way. what might be good advice in Libya could be awful advice for an American. instead of understanding that this is a difference of opinion (and you by nature of where you live are in the minority) you are pushing back and insisting that you are right. this is why you are getting the strong reaction t…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 12:45 AM
6

sorry, i don't mean to troll. it's just something i hear about a lot on the internet but haven't seen in real life. i would also be curious to see actual numbers on this, as everyone seems to have very different experiences!
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 12:33 AM
5

yeah, understood. on the other hand, i worry that blowing these things out of proportion might cause women to settle with someone pretty lacklustre for fear of being left on the shelf. we should strive to look at the dating situation clearly and make decisions based on reality, not anxiety. in my early-30s and older professional circles i know quite a few more men who are single and looking than women who are, so i personally wouldn't take much stock in the MGTOW or sad old cat lady tropes. perh…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 12:26 AM
40

it may not be very PC, but it's my view that marriages will usually work best when the cultural differences are minimized. i think you have the best chance of it being harmonious and satisfying when partners are from a similar culture, religion, race and social class. people might tell you it's snobbish or superficial to look at someone's class when vetting them, but really i would look at class differences in the same way you'd look at a difference in religion or worldview. my husband and i are…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 12:19 AM
1

what is the average age gap in a marriage there? does it vary depending on the social status of the family? what percentage of marriages would you say are polygamous? do many women refuse to enter into polygamous marriages? is monogamy/polygamy discussed and agreed upon before you marry? what happens if you marry a man expecting monogamy and he later decides to take another wife? do parents usually do the match-making for their children? are the partners usually chosen based on their financial s…
/r/RedPillWomen31/05/18 12:01 AM
2

you're welcome :) i have to say that you're coming across as really sweet in this thread and handling all of the difference of opinion with a lot of grace.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 11:51 PM
2

i think that with the cultural differences you will struggle to make peace with how things are done in the west. couples over here greatly value transparency and openness above almost anything else. it's a cultural thing, and you won't be able to convince many westerners that your approach is appropriate or useful to either the man or the woman in the situation.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 11:48 PM
3

i agree with what you're saying, but i think it's worth noting from her other post that /u/HarshaCity is Libyan so is from a very different culture to most of the posters here. Perhaps in Libya it's more normal to keep parts of your history to yourself? i certainly wouldn't recommend women in the west lie or actively hide their history, but i have no idea how relationships work in North Africa or what a wise move might be in a place like that.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 11:46 PM
7

I've never had a man ask about my n count, or any specific details about past relationships really. I wouldn't lie if my husband did ask of course, but if during the dating period he'd really pressed to know how many people I'd slept with I'd find that pretty weird and reconsider if we were a good fit. My husband and I know the general gist of each other's histories, I haven't ever felt the need to avoid any topics that have naturally come up and he hasn't shown any discomfort with what he does …
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 09:04 PM
7

Are you serious? Your wife said she wants to go on tinder? And what... find a side piece to sleep with? This is so weird. Have you been monogamous up until now? She was either making a really, really bad joke, or she's done with the marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen30/05/18 07:20 AM
1

I'm assuming you mean a 7, 8, and 9 in terms of looks, and I don't care a ton about looks/am not necessarily most attracted to the most objectively physically attractive guy. OP mentioned further down that her attraction to a man is based on everything, not just looks :) physical looks is just a small part of attraction for most women so i think you'd agree with her there I often rank them in my head, and while I like the #1 guy the most, I can still find the others attractive i think /u/torridt…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 11:55 PM
1

Yeah, it could be that I'm in a happy bubble. Our views on these things are certainly persuaded by the people and the ideas we surround ourselves with, and my circle tends to be happily married. I also think though that internet places like MGTOW and whereareallthegoodmen are another kind of bubble, and if you spend time in these communities you're likely to develop a skewed perspective on how common these things are. The beauty of, and sometimes the problem with, the internet is that niche idea…
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 11:21 PM
3

Yup you've got the right idea, just move along. What he's doing is very childish and you'd be better off looking for guys who are more secure in themselves. Good luck with it :)
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 11:04 PM
1

I'm glad :)
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 11:01 PM
1

You're very active in a community that goes out of its way to mock our members. Not trying to convey anything, just think it's odd.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 10:52 PM
1

So entertaining
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 10:03 PM
5

"the wall" is just a fancy word for getting older and attracting less attention than you used to. For a woman who looks after herself, the wall can be very soft. For a man who doesn't, it can hit him like a ton of bricks. Take good care of yourself now and you can be very attractive well into your 30s, keeping in mind that a woman has far more to offer than just her looks. Once you've got a good man, the position of wife and mother attracts an almost superhuman kind of respect in his eyes.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 09:26 PM
1

OP please ignore the garbage over at /u/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen. That sub reeks of bitterness and they're using you to validate their sick revenge fantasy. It's pathetic.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 09:13 PM
2

You're looking at it backwards. You won't be truly attracted to another man until you begin to forget this guy.
/r/RedPillWomen29/05/18 03:14 AM
15

Don't feel ashamed, it happens to the best of us! If I were you I would tell him very clearly that you are not interested, and to please stop contacting you in any form. Make sure he knows that you don't appreciate his contact, be rude if you need to. Just know that you won't be getting over him while he's in your life and take steps to fix that. It will fade with time, I promise!
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 02:00 PM
29

How long has it been since you were with guy 2? Take space from him. Block his number, delete him on social media, do not put yourself in a position where you'll run into him, don't even think of him! The female brain is very good at blocking out all other men when it thinks it's found a good one. As painful as it is, take this as a good sign - it means you're built for monogamy. This feeling for him will pass, and you WILL feel real attraction to other men. It won't happen right away, but the m…
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 01:34 PM
1

That's fair enough, you know what's worked for you in the past and that's more than most people :) You've got this
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 12:28 PM
6

You don't know any women in their 30's and 40's who are painfully single and desperately want to find a man? I actually don't. I know a couple of single men who are looking, but I'm in my 30s and all the women I know are married or paired off happily. I'm sure they do exist, but it's certainly not some kind of epidemic. Though I can see how you might feel that way if you spend a lot of time on /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen But that bachelor in his 30's, 40's, 50's and beyond who "just hasn't found th…
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 12:11 PM
3

2 days is a start! I'm on MFP too, you can pm me your profile there if you'd like to follow each other :) no stress if not though, I know it's personal. Are you following any particular way of eating for your weight loss? I personally like keto when I want to lose. It's restrictive, but I find my appetite disappears when I'm on it which makes everything a lot easier! Sounds like your friends are just jealous. Have you heard of tall poppy syndrome? I'd start looking for more fitness minded friend…
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 02:29 AM
3

This is not the place to debate religion. Please respect OPs beliefs and move on if you don't have anything useful to say.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 02:01 AM
1

What do you mean by people not taking you seriously? Because they're feminists? If your friends have a different view on feminism to you, that's fine. Just connect with them over things you do agree on and enjoy their friendship in that way. I have plenty of feminist friends and we have a great time together, I just make sure not to be that person who's always trying to force my opinions on them. If you can find additional friends who share your beliefs, then that's great. As for the weight, you…
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 01:58 AM
4

You should mind your own business. Live your own life and let her do what she wants.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 01:51 AM
2

I don't think what you're describing is specifically a feminist opinion, it's just reality :) A lot of men in this sub might think that everything we do is targeted at getting/keeping a man, but in reality men and women are both complex beings with a whole host of drives and behaviours. Of course it's important to be aware of what's attractive to a man if our aim is to get/keep one, but to overlook all of the other aspects of a woman's life is just disingenuous.
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 01:28 AM
10

The ever increasing numbers of women complaining - where are all the good men? is because they overpriced themselves to the point where men aren't interested in buying what they have to sell. I don't see this happening either. I see men and women both wishing they could do better with the opposite sex, but that's a normal thing that's been going on forever. I certainly don't see women in particular pricing themselves out of the marketplace, or men responding by going "MGTOW". It's just an intern…
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/18 01:25 AM
2

Does family mean the girls' parents or their husbands? If they're married women visiting with their husbands, I wouldn't worry too much. Unless he's given you reason to believe there's something going on, I'd just try to let it go. If they're unmarried women, I would definitely speak to your fiance about it. Having single girls stay with you as a single man is fine, I don't think it's acceptable for an engaged/married man to be having single women stay while you're not there. Depending on their …
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 04:47 PM
2

You might want to ask in /r/femininenotfeminist. They often talk about things like LYS and kibbe :)
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 01:05 PM
3

That depends on your salaries and priorities in life. I'll gladly spend $50 on my nails, and my husband will gladly spend $50 on some fancy hiking socks. Neither of us understand the other's interests, but we respect and appreciate that they exist.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 12:44 PM
3

Exactly :) And also, even if it was expensive, a hobby is a hobby! I don't have anything to gain from my husband's expensive shooting or motorcycle or sailing hobbies, but I love that he has them. Likewise, my husband loves that I have hobbies that he's not necessarily interested in. He doesn't care about my stupidly expensive piano, but he loves that I have interests that I'm passionate about. Being a well rounded woman is very attractive to most men, and things like fashion and yes even "Mona …
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 12:38 PM
4

I disagree. She's saying she wants a man who values her RMV over her SMV. I know plenty of women who feel the same. I'm not saying it is or isn't a good strategy, but as a woman, saying that you want to be judged on your intelligence is very different to saying that your intelligence makes you sexy.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 12:17 PM
3

She's saying she wants to be valued for her intelligence, not her looks. She's not saying her brain makes her sexually attractive.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 07:01 AM
2

Ah yep that makes perfect sense and I agree entirely! When things get busy at work I have no problem hiring a cleaner, and would definitely be open to cutting down hours if I wasn't keeping up.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 04:01 AM
1

I think the problem is the underlying (often feminist) assumption that earning income / going to work isn't a choice but who does the dishes is. Could you expand on this point at all? I don't think I get it. I feel like the biggest problem comes from these women feeling unappreciated, whether that's justified or not. I do know men who don't seem to understand or acknowledge what goes into running a household, and I think I would also find that really frustrating. I'm really lucky that even thoug…
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 03:30 AM
5

This is so true. I also spend a lot on my appearance and my husband loves the results. Once you're beyond 25 or so money makes a huge difference.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 03:17 AM
1

This is a good point. I do think that women tend to end up in the household manager role as a default, and in most cases it makes sense because women generally are more skilled in that sphere. I don't personally relate to the comic, but I do understand where the sentiment comes from. If a couple are both working full time at demanding jobs, it could absolutely feel overwhelming and unfair to come home and have another job on top of that. In the past household management was often a full time gig…
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 03:10 AM
1

That's great he's so understanding :) my husband had ADHD and I'm the opposite, so it was a steep learning curve for me. It wasn't easy at first, it sounds like you've got a good one
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 03:03 AM
9

Hahaha yep if my husband had his way I'd be looking a lot sluttier on our date nights. Some looks need to stay indoors :p
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 02:53 AM
11

On a similar note I don't feel like many women think their job/education triggers sexual attraction in a man. Maybe some women think this way, but most women I know see it as a complement to their RMV, and in many cases it does. My husband loves that I'm educated and have an interesting career, he's never dated a woman who isn't intellectually stimulating. Not all men care about this, but in my experience it's certainly important among smart, professional men.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 02:38 AM
14

Yeah exactly. Not everything I do to my appearance is for my husband's sake, I enjoy fashion and beauty in itself and have a lot of fun with it! I wouldn't do anything that makes me unattractive to him, but he couldn't care less about my nail color lol.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 02:33 AM
40

No woman thinks that men find her Mona Lisa nails attractive, that's not what they do it for. A huge part of fashion is targeting the female social matrix.
/r/RedPillWomen25/05/18 01:51 AM
6

i'm sorry, where does RPW say not to live together before marriage? i understand that it's not for everyone and we need to be careful not to fall into a forever-girlfriend role, but if done correctly living together can tell you a lot about your compatibility and prepare you well for marriage.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/18 06:04 AM
15

/r/badwomensanatomy
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/18 09:01 PM
1

How many men will become sexually aroused from soothing their crying wives? Almost all. I don't know where you're getting this weird idea from but it's just not true
/r/RedPillWomen14/05/18 08:56 PM
3

One year ago you said I was having sex with other men happily 2 months ago. Three days ago you said I was a virgin until marriage You're full of shit. Why waste your time making up weird online personas? Who are you trying to impress?
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/18 06:03 AM
2

Bingo
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/18 03:56 AM
2

Well that sounds healthy 🙄
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/18 01:10 AM
1

Perhaps then you want to update your post where it says that men's powerful drive to love their partner is absent in women. This is entirely untrue.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 01:01 PM
4

Yes exactly. You really can't compare male and female love, they serve entirely different purposes. When a man complains that a woman doesn't love him in the way he loves her, it's like complaining that an apple isn't an orange. My husband also doesn't respect me in the same form that my respect for him takes, but I would never complain that he respects me less. He feels a huge amount of respect for me, it's just different.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 12:24 PM
1

Are there no expats in your country? Can you travel abroad for study?
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 12:17 PM
3

Yup I'm going to throw in another vote for neither. I would never date a TRP guy or someone who seemingly enjoyed making me wait. I want a man that's mad about me, and beyond playing silly power games. I would also not date a man who didn't have his life in order. Being healthy and established is a must for me.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 12:04 PM
1

Yeah. I've clearly struck a nerve with some of the guys here. Of course if you only look at love from your own perspective it's going to look like you're doing more of it - but that's just solipsism. It's natural to feel that way but it's not right.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 11:58 AM
2

this is a great explanation :) love is what we feel in order to carry on our relationships in a way that works and has worked for generations. of course it's going to manifest differently in men, women and children - it doesn't mean one loves less, just that our love serves a different role in the family unit.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 04:36 AM
2

sorry, this isn't a place for men to ask relationship advice.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 03:46 AM
0

women absolutely do love men, and yes to the same degree than men love women. it is a different kind of love with different characteristics and requirements, sure. loneliness is simply using a male-centric definition of love which is why he sees a discrepancy in the "amount" of love.
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/18 03:44 AM
6

You're going to have to decide if this is a deal breaker to you, because if you really like the guy I'd suggest just letting it go. You've got that buzz of attraction with Oliver, that's good. You should come up with a short list of what traits are absolute necessities in a man beyond that intangible attraction. Maybe 4-5 of them. To give you an idea, mine would be: emotionally stable, smart, wants marriage/a family one day, good with money, has interesting hobbies. Think of yours - is "pays for…
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/18 11:02 AM
1

A lot of this kind of behavior is just habitual. If you stay really vigilant for the first little while, you'll probably find that it tapers off on your own until it's not a habit anymore. In the meantime, I would second what another poster said about a gratitude journal. This along with just being extra mindful in all of your interactions with him should help.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/18 01:59 AM
3

If it's just a summer job and you don't think it will lead to any resentment, I say go for it. Like the other posters have said though, make sure you iron our the details and be clear on what's expected on both ends. If you know where you're headed career wise, I would use this extra time to progress yourself there. I don't know your field, but maybe put aside a couple of hours a day to work on networking/skills/experience/etc.
/r/RedPillWomen08/05/18 01:56 AM
11

but it's so easy to fall into doubting myself and what I contribute to our relationship Uh, how about that child of his you're brewing? That's a pretty big contribution I'd say! I feel like it's important for me to make up for all the crap I put him through What crap? Do you mean not being able have sex while you were pregnant with his child and very ill? This is understandable. This is normal. You're not expected to be a sex goddess while you're that unwell. Of course give whatever intimacy you…
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/18 09:03 AM
4

For now I would focus on keeping yourself relaxed and healthy for your impending childbirth. Pregnancy is always going to be a difficult and stressful time, especially if it's your first. It's totally normal for sex to slow down and for there to be some tension between you. It's a new experience for you both, you've got hormones flying around and he's probably nervous about the big changes that are coming and how he'll look after you both. My advice would be to enjoy your last few weeks you have…
/r/RedPillWomen07/05/18 08:30 AM
4

Yeah this is spot on. It's so damn easy to be the cheerleader when everything's going well. It takes a lot of work to maintain that when he's struggling to fulfill his own end of things.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 11:54 PM
5

I'm really enjoying this series you're writing up, thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 11:45 PM
2

I agree with you completely. I think 99% of the time if a man's concerned with n count it comes from a place of fear or anxiety over his own history.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 11:33 PM
4

I'm more talking about the self defeating attitude. If you assume no man will want you, you won't get far. If you're doing well these days then I don't think a reasonable guy will turn you down over some old scars. We all have our histories. Focus on what you have to offer and in the name of all that is holy please don't listen to the guys on TRP. They are not your target audience!
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 11:06 PM
8

If the way you carry on in this thread is indicative of your attitude with men, then yeah I think they'll be turned off.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 09:49 PM
2

DBT is not meds. Have you tried therapy?
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 05:40 PM
2

Forcing someone is bad. But not getting any sex while desiring (involuntary celebrate) is bad too. These are not at all comparable
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 11:52 AM
10

DBT
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 11:39 AM
2

Good looking socially adjusted men are not entitled to a woman's body, they incite lust and love so that a woman wants to sleep with them.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 09:39 AM
8

I absolutely believe that sex work should be legal and destigmatised, but I don't think incels are a good reason for that. The incel violence we've seen is caused by mental illness. The lack of sex is surely frustrating for a man, but it is usually also a result of the mental illness. Simply letting these guys buy sex is not going to solve the bigger problem that they feel alone and unwanted. People want to feel desired, and a prostitute will never solve that problem.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 09:38 AM
1

My husband and I are very forward with this stuff, so if it was me I would just tell him that I love the idea of receiving a nice gift from him, and it would make me really happy. Maybe tell him that you'd be so excited to open something he's chosen out that you can keep and remind you of him. Men want to make us happy, so being clear with him is actually doing him a favour :)
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 08:46 AM
3

I think that in general, relationships tend to work out best when the couple have a lot in common culturally. Big differences in religion, language, ethnicity or social class may not be insurmountable, but will make things more difficult. In my experience men from the upper class prefer women who present well and make him look good to his peers. When I go to events with my husband, my education, career and upbringing serve us both well.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 08:41 AM
3

We're similar. My husband never asked my number but we go to sex parties together so I'm sure he doesn't think I'm virginial lol. Some men get bored of good girls, and these are the men that I like. My history and our dynamic hasn't affected our ability to bond in the slightest, I'm sure he'd laugh if I suggested such a thing.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 08:25 AM
4

Yeah I think there's a big distinction to be made between religious or non-western men and the rest. I've only dealt with non religious men, and none of them have cared in the slightest.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 02:35 AM
5

Agreed. By all means cause a fuss over n count if you want, but that's not a man I would be able to look up to. Neuroticism and jealousy are very feminine traits in my mind and that kills attraction for me.
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/18 02:27 AM
20

No man has ever asked about mine. I agree with you that it tends to be the insecure ones who obsess over a woman's experience.
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/18 10:12 PM
2

A BMI of 18 is underweight.
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/18 02:44 AM
1

You're welcome :) hope it all goes well!
/r/RedPillWomen04/05/18 02:42 AM
6

Ok first off, you need to find out any dietary requirements - once you know of any vegetarians/allergies you can start planning a menu. What is the formality of the dinner? Is it for a special event? For more casual events I like to do a kind of station where guests can assemble their own meal. A sort of buffet style means that guests can pick and choose what they'd like, and takes the pressure off you to serve everything and wonder if everyone is getting enough of what they want. Start with a t…
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/18 10:28 PM
3

He sounds like a pain in the ass. Have a clear talk with him and say you want to remain business partners but not romantic in any way. If you can save the business relationship great, if not then move along. By all means work on your emotional regulation if you think it's a problem, but from what you've said here he sounds like he's deliberately upsetting you and then complaining when you react. This is how teenage girls carry on, not boyfriends.
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/18 02:48 AM
3

Good on you for getting out there! Mental health can be really disabling so it's admirable that you're going to the effort of improving yourself and overcoming that. Online dating sounds like a good route if you have social anxiety. I wouldn't feel the need to advertise your inexperience on there, but maybe when you're messaging a man you could let him know a bit of your story. Be honest, but present yourself in a positive way. For example, instead of saying "I'm a virgin because I suffer from c…
/r/RedPillWomen03/05/18 02:35 AM
–

Yeah, I don't quite understand that either. I feel like they mostly have the best of intentions, but without having experienced actually being a woman and dating as a woman, I wonder how accurate the advice can be.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/18 10:52 PM
–

I agree with you wholeheartedly. I think the biggest understandings for red pill women to come to are: attraction and respect for your partner is absolutely crucial to a happy marriage. attraction is non-negotiable. You cannot "RPW" your way into adoring a man who is not worthy of adoration. men worthy of adoration are not committing to sub par women. If you want that man, you need to work hard and become the right kind of woman. RPW can't teach you to love a man you're not already crazy about, …
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/18 12:56 AM
1

I would allow your bf to dictate how much contact is acceptable between you. Different families are ok with different levels of public affection, so let him take the lead here. Be kind and supportive of him, and please don't engage in any teasing or harsh joking about him, even if it's something his family does.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/18 12:22 AM
1

Try asking at /r/marriedredpill As a general rule, men tend to be better at giving advice to men, and women to women. The men over there have likely dealt with similar problems and can tell you what worked for them. Strictly from a woman's perspective, I think that women tend to nag a lot when they're unhappy, especially if that unhappiness is coming from a place of stress or too much responsibility. If she feels like she's floundering and failing to keep on top of things, some women will resort…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/18 12:17 AM
1

For the relationship stuff, she really needs a female mentor, not her brother. Is there a woman she can talk to about this stuff? Maybe a happily married aunt or family friend?
/r/RedPillWomen01/05/18 08:36 PM
2

Yeah good point. I was thinking of never married.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 02:01 AM
0

Oh yes. I was thinking never married. Would sooner go for a divorced guy with all his baggage than a never married 40 year old.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 02:00 AM
11

If a woman meets an unmarried 40 year old she's going to wonder what's wrong with him. Good relationship prospects aren't usually single at 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/18 12:49 AM
6

My husband is close in age to me, and I like that. I feel like it makes things quite effortless between us. We had vastly different lives before meeting, but a similar amount of experience so that works really nicely. I have dated older in the past, the biggest gap I had was about 15 years (23 and 38). It was fun and I did enjoy the dynamic of him being the more experienced one in life, but ultimately I prefer the smaller gap. It just feels more relatable. I feel like a bigger gap like that woul…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/18 10:30 PM
15

Yes, marriage has always been a hard requirement for me and something I vetted for. If a man doesn't want to marry that's his business, but I wouldn't stay with him. I grew up in a very loving, stable household and I believe that with the right person and enough work almost anything can be overcome. My husband and I spoke at length about this while we were dating and were on the same page about it. For us, divorce just isn't an option. I think the modern west has fed us this narrative where marr…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/18 10:19 PM
2

I agree with all of this and had the same experience with my husband! When I met my husband and my hypergamy settled right down I knew I was on to a good thing. If I had ignored my hypergamy in my previous relationships I would have ended up with someone who didn't really light my fire, and we both would have been miserable. That nagging feeling of "maybe I can do better" was actually right, and I was able to use that feeling work on myself until I was the kind of woman my husband would want. I …
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/18 09:42 PM
1

Well yes of course, if a woman's standards are too high and she's not able to improve herself/won't do the work to reach them she'll have a bad time. That's not at all what I'm talking about though. I'm talking about using your hypergamy to drive you to improve yourself and land a man who will make you happy. My hypergamy made me realise what kind of man would make me truly happy, and that I had to work on myself if I was going to land him. I did, and it worked. There's a lot of space between a …
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/18 09:36 PM
0

Hypergamy isn't about the woman improving, it's about finding a better man. It absolutely is about improving if you can't land the kind of man you're attracted to. It drives women to be worthy of a high status man.
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/18 01:41 PM
12

This is all true enough, but please keep in mind that hypergamy is not always a negative thing! I know it looks that way from the perspective of a man trying to keep his woman, but it is also one of the forces that keeps women pushing forward and improving. Hypergamy is what prevents women from staying in relationships where she will feel never feel true attraction (which we all know is non negotiable!), and a marriage without that is no good for the woman OR the man. A woman should use her hype…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/18 06:17 AM
2

Cute!
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/18 05:41 AM
13

Congrats! My husband is the same in that he gets really touched when I make an effort to look after his family. When so many people are bitching about their inlaws, he likes that his family is important me and it sounds like your husband feels the same way.
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/18 05:39 AM
25

Yeah, you're overthinking! If you make a big deal over it he will feel emasculated. He wants to ski, he knows you're better at it, it's no big deal. Don't fuss over him, if he tells you to go off and ski alone, then do that. Enjoy your days skiing apart, and spend some quality time doing couply things when you're done for the day. Congrats on your marriage :)
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/18 05:36 AM
5

That's right. Even if you did "level up" you would still maintain a lot of middle class tells and would always appear a bit of an outsider in UC circles. Class usually correlates with income/net worth but is ultimately a culture.
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 11:01 PM
1

Good job!
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 09:29 PM
2

My husband has slowly opened up to me over time. It used to bother me when things were new, but I found that once i stopped trying to drag it out of him it started to come more naturally. He's certainly not as forthcoming as I am, but nowadays he seems to actually enjoy sharing these parts of himself and even asks my advice on emotional/personal matters. The biggest things I try to remember are being encouraging and non-judgemental, as you said, and also to actually thank him for opening up when…
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 10:18 AM
30

Take a break from the internet and especially pill subs. The stuff you read here and on TRP can be pretty extreme and is often targeted at the minority of people who are having serious trouble getting/keeping a good relationship. Focus on you, your partner and your relationship. Be grateful for what you have and take good care of it. No need to overthink it if it's causing you stress, you'll do just fine.
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 10:11 AM
4

Lol I only saw one person finger-wagging in this thread and it wasn't you!
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 04:59 AM
9

My husband is naturally more reserved and private with his emotions than I am, but I've learnt the ways that he shows his love and that he is very affectionate in his own way. His shows of love and affection tend to be more practical, and I love him for that. If he was overbearing with his emotions I would find that annoying. Likewise, if he deliberately withheld affection from me to meet some silly rule I'd be turned off. I think that men who are already masculine and attractive don't need to b…
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 01:55 AM
8

Perhaps she wants to have a discussion about female sexual strategy with other women?
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 01:46 AM
15

This is an excellent post, and definitely something that should be discussed more openly. The only point I would add is to be careful not to conflate pure net worth with social class too strictly. A working class man who suddenly comes into a large amount of money may be a 1%er, but culturally will still like a lot of the same things that working class men like. This is why you see sports stars or DJs pairing off with porn stars, when a man from old money would not. In other direction, my husban…
/r/RedPillWomen23/04/18 01:44 AM
0

No, the post I linked did not talk about nagging vs asking. It advised against clarifying exclusivity in any form at all. I'm all for avoiding nagging, but telling women to just go along with it and sleep with a man blindly is silly. Great for a man who wants to get laid, not so great for a woman who wants to save her notches for an actual relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 11:44 PM
0

Where did I suggest nagging? Whisper's post advised to not have "the talk" full stop. I'm saying don't nag, don't negotiate, simply ask and move on if his answer isn't what you're after.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 10:44 PM
3

I'm glad it worked for you, but I still wouldn't recommend this tactic to women. Lots of men will feign affection in order to bed a girl, but if asked outright "where is this going? Are we exclusive" (more carefully worded of course lol) will show their hand. I've made this mistake before and ended up in OP's position. It doesn't need to be negotiating commitment, simply putting your cards on the table and making sure you're after the same thing before jumping into bed. If he's not after commitm…
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 10:43 PM
5

The post gives advice that is detrimental to the female sexual strategy, and this post here is a perfect example of what happens when someone follows it. The point of this sub is to use a red pill lens to discuss female sexual strategy, not how to make yourself sexually available to a man with no plans to commit
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 06:00 PM
2

https://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/7za0r6/the_talk_is_socially_retarded_dont_do_it?sort=confidence
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 04:38 PM
41

It's my opinion that a relationship where cheating has occurred is not worth trying to save. It rarely works out, and after just 9 months together it's not worth the investment. Move on, find someone new, and make sure that your next partner is someone who values monogamy.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 11:04 AM
1

Check out Tim Ferris' 4 hour chef. He starts from the absolute beginning and teaches you all the skills as you work through the recipe book.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 01:19 AM
14

Avoiding the commitment talk was terrible advice in my opinion and should never have been taken seriously. I'm not sure what the mods were thinking allowing that to be pinned. OPs situation is the obvious endpoint of that. Avoiding the commitment talk is helping the male imperative, not the female.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 12:42 AM
6

This is why you clarify exclusivity. Always always always.
/r/RedPillWomen22/04/18 12:40 AM
2

I don't think you did anything wrong, from what you've said he was unclear. If he wanted to pick out your ring, he should have said so before ordering it. I would say to him clearly and gently that you didn't realise he wanted to choose the ring and that you were trying to be helpful. He's clearly unhappy about it, so ask him what he would like to do to make it better. If he wants to sell it and look for another, be ok with that. If he doesn't have a solution and just wants to grumble for the sa…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 05:13 AM
23

I personally think that splitting the bill is impersonal and a bad idea for dates. Alternating who pays on dates is a good compromise I believe. A man will generally want to treat you, accept this graciously. Perhaps after he's paid for dinner, you treat the both of you to dessert somewhere else or drinks in a bar. This shows that you're willing to contribute without potentially emasculating him or giving him the impression you're looking for friends.
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 05:08 AM
13

Usually having "commitment issues" is code for not seeing you as wife material or not being ready to settle down, unfortunately. I think the worst thing you can do at this point is chase him, you need to give him a little time. He'll come back to you if he decides that this is what he wants. When you see him at this event, be sweet and friendly, but not over the top or flirtatious. Let him see you in your best light and maybe it will stir something, maybe it won't. Maybe a few days after the eve…
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 05:04 AM
2

The "problem" is that she wants a relationship with him. Commitment is the goal of all the women here, why do you sound surprised?
/r/RedPillWomen16/04/18 04:55 AM
1

I would save it for when it appears clear that you're headed towards exclusivity but before you've slept together. Maybe when you have the "are we a couple" talk. Don't drop it as being a huge thing, but have a good think about what you can both do to help you move past it. Perhaps not sleeping in the same bed for the first little while?
/r/RedPillWomen15/04/18 04:10 AM
1

Title says 18
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/18 08:36 AM
9

Tell your parents. This has nothing to do with RPW.
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/18 10:51 PM
2

virgins religious people don't get divorced
/r/RedPillWomen11/04/18 11:57 AM
5

His view is quite extreme. Normal men don't expect virginity anymore. Make sure your first time is with someone special who you would like a future with, and definitely wait until there is clear exclusivity, but there's no need to wait for marriage/engagement. Having a couple of sexual partners before you find your husband is just fine.
/r/RedPillWomen09/04/18 05:32 AM
23

I wouldn't put my money on him changing. If he's not doing it for you now he never will. Go out there and find someone more suited to you.
/r/RedPillWomen06/04/18 03:31 AM
7

i think that once you're married, your money is his and vice versa. if his business idea is something you both believe in, then i wouldn't see it as you "gifting" him the capital, but as you making a financial decision together and funding that as a married unit. if you treat yourself as the benefactor, it will lead to a really odd dynamic where he's asking you for money and you're doling it out. you'll become his "boss" again and he'll feel the need to live up to your contribution. lend your ex…
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/18 05:24 AM
3

Give him words of reassurance with his head in your breasts. this comes across as weird and infantilizing imo. you want him to feel like a man who can achieve anything, not a coddled baby.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/18 05:19 AM
7

Careful with birth control. It turned me into an emotional wreck.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/18 09:52 PM
4

I love this comment and learnt a lot from it. Thank you!
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/18 09:51 PM
1

Beta does not mean low status.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/18 09:45 PM
–

Avoid men who act like the ones on TRP. They tend to be angry and not looking for commitment. There are plenty of attractive, masculine men out there who are looking for marriage, concern yourself with what they are looking for.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 02:18 PM
5

Agreeing with the rest of the posters. Let it go. You don't want to date a carbon copy of yourself. Unless it is a serious, serious deal-breaker for you just let it go.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 02:06 PM
1

I know, but those women are outliers and I'm not talking about them. I am specifically talking about women who behave that way unnaturally in order to impress a guy.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 02:04 PM
3

I'm also reading the stranger! I read it in French a couple of years ago when I was learning the language, reading it in English now I'm realizing how much I missed haha.
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/18 02:03 PM
9

right? people act like the 50s was some kind of prudish social utopia where everyone behaved themselves.
/r/RedPillWomen28/03/18 10:47 PM
3

Eating low carb or even keto will allow your body to let go of extra fluid and bloating. I always feel slimmer and tighter when I'm eating very low carb, even before any fat has come off.
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 10:55 PM
19

wow, i must be really old because i don't understand what half of those quotes mean. i think i do understand what you're getting at, though, and i agree. there's certainly a trend of young women trying to act like the "cool girl" in an attempt to get in with the guys. acting like she doesn't want a relationship, doesn't care about romance, never wants to marry, is ok with nonmonogamy, etc, etc, and it always backfires on her from what i've seen. it's really sad watching these girls who desperate…
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 10:17 AM
1

No, I would never be ok with fully committing myself to and having children with a man who refused to marry me. I understand that there are financial risks for a man, but a woman is also taking risks when she gives herself to a man. She risks giving up her fertile years, the physical burden of pregnancy and most of all, she risks that he impregnates her and abandons her with his children. Marriage is his formal promise to her and their community that he will continue to protect and provide for h…
/r/RedPillWomen27/03/18 10:06 AM
11

that's great advice from your mother :) i heard a similar sentiment put differently when i was single - "stop trying to find the right partner and focus on being the right partner". it worked a treat!
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 11:54 PM
3

i disagree that there needs to be a middle ground. if marriage is a requirement for her, and it is a deal breaker for him then they are incompatible. she should not agree to lifetime de facto status if marriage is what she wants.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 11:51 PM
7

if they're having children together it's assumed that finances will be joined. once your lives are permanently joined by children it doesn't make a difference if they are married or not. if he's supporting a de facto partner and their children then he will be on the hook for child support and alimony whether or not they marry.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 11:49 PM
20

i don't blame you - i certainly wouldn't have remained a forever-girlfriend to my husband. you simply need to be clear with him that this is a deal breaker. don't fight or nag or show excessive emotion about it - just be calm and be honest. tell him that you love him deeply, that you want to share your life with him and to have a family together, but that marriage is a necessity to you and that you'll need to find that elsewhere if it's something he's opposed to. you shouldn't blame him for not …
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 11:45 PM
5

if they are living together with children and joint assets, then marrying will not give her any extra power.
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/18 11:36 PM
2

I made these salmon burgers recently and they were an absolute hit. My husband asks for them all the time. www.seriouseats.com/amp/recipes/2017/04/salmon-burgers-remoulade-fennel-slaw-recipe.html A couple of tips: It is labor intensive dicing fresh salmon fillets, but it's worth it. Do not use the canned stuff. Dice it small! Pop the fillets in the freezer for a bit before you start so that they're almost frozen. Makes it much easier to dice. To make it more worth your while, dice 3 or 4 times w…
/r/RedPillWomen18/03/18 12:01 AM
6

I'm sorry but substituting ginger for tumeric made me laugh. I can see how they sort of look the same but it hurts the cook in me!
/r/RedPillWomen17/03/18 11:47 PM
1

Yup he's just looking to get laid. Move along.
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/18 10:31 PM
7

Like other posters have said, the sex talk is uncomfortable but I don't think it's a sign of something seriously wrong. I would also find it disrespectful if my husband spoke like that, and I would probably ask him gently why he does it, and let him know that it's hurtful. The lies about wanting to settle down are far weirder in my opinion. I could see it coming from a guy in his early 20s, but at 35 it reeks of insecurity. I don't doubt that he wants those things, but it sounds like he's suppli…
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/18 10:28 PM
13

What are your husband's work hours like? Is he able to take care of some of the housework for you? Is he able to hire a cleaner to share the load?
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/18 10:21 PM
1

aw cute <3
/r/RedPillWomen07/03/18 10:48 PM
3

Ok it's not YouTube but check out the 4 hour chef by Tim Ferris. It's a cookbook with a program of recipes where you learn a new skill with each one. He goes through technique, nutrition, flavor combinations - it's super useful for a beginner cook.
/r/RedPillWomen04/03/18 11:27 AM
–

Sure, will have a think and write something up :)
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/18 12:11 AM
–

Aw I'm glad it spoke to you. I can't remember where I first heard it, but it really helped me see the good in people :)
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 10:16 PM
2

This is a really interesting perspective, thank you
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 07:06 PM
3

1- what would you say is a submissive mentality? in my opinion healthy submission is a choice, and that's what makes it so special. plenty of women are naturally submissive, and it backfires on them. submission without careful thought can land you in abusive relationships or have you taken advantage of. a true submissive mentality is waking up every day and deciding that you respect your partner so deeply that you are handing the reins over to him. it's about careful vetting and trust and eventu…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 07:21 AM
1

Before exclusivity I would be exclusive anyway. Just because I wouldn't be bothered to go out with others and I don't particularly like the thought of it. What is your opinion of this? that's fine! i also preferred to focus on one man at a time when i was dating. just understand that he may be seeing other people, and that until that exclusivity talk has been had, you need to be ok with this. In the past I've had bad sexual experiences with my boyfriends and all of them have had low sex drives /…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 07:04 AM
–

what happens if you disagree on something? who gets the final say? would you trust him to take control of these big decisions?
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:55 AM
–

traditional relationships will only make a woman happy in the modern world if you have a good man. if you find yourself a good man, who is not just attractive but caring and protective and capable then there is no greater feeling than giving yourself to him. it's difficult to describe to a man as our psychologies are so different, but being able to hand over control to someone we deeply trust is very comforting and rewarding. i remember as a child i asked my mom why it is that when dad's friends…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:50 AM
–

one thing that helped me early on was little exercises in changing my attitude toward men in general. i came from a feminist social circle, so was constantly surrounded by "men are dumb/rapists/dangerous" rhetoric. i heard a tip somewhere to make an effort to think kindly of the men in your life often, and make it a habit. for example, next time you talk to your dad on the phone, take a moment to appreciate how clever or caring he is, how well he takes care of your mother. a man helps you take y…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:46 AM
–

it depends on the state of your marriage i think. if you're already pretty solid and you're both happy, then i find they're a bit basic and you'll be going "well, duh!" the whole way through. not to say they're no good, they just seem to be aimed at unhappy couples. if you're having problems and either of you are unhappy then absolutely they're a great starting point. surrendered wife is a great one for anxious, control-hungry women i think.
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:38 AM
8

you're right that you shouldn't blame yourself for his infidelity - i strongly believe that both partners are wholly responsible for how they behave in a marriage. however, people do make mistakes and you can change your behavior to hopefully prevent him making those mistakes again. you've recognised your own mistakes in how you treated him leading up to his cheating, and it sounds like you've changed that for the better. hopefully this is enough to keep him happy and home with you. did you only…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:35 AM
2

exactly :)
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:31 AM
1

this all sounds really tough, i'm sorry you're both going through it. it sounds like you're in a position where you're in a habit of fighting and drama and have made this your normal behavior on both ends. this needs to stop. it really, really needs to stop. it is not normal and it is not acceptable for either of you to carry on this way. if it was just your bf misbehaving, i would say to leave him and don't look back, but it seems like you're both struggling to be a good partner. my advice to y…
/r/RedPillWomen02/03/18 06:23 AM
0

SMP, not SMV
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 05:36 PM
1

Oh my husband is an engineer too :) The majority of his circle are fellow engineers, lawyers, doctors, pilots, etc, so we do get a bit of a mix but I understand that it's limited to UMC professionals. Interesting that this is the way your circle has gone, but it's just not something we've seen in ours.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 02:48 AM
1

Yeah, that makes sense. I am speaking though from conversations I've had with my husband about the men he knows. We married recently so have spoken a lot on these topics lately! I'm sure it's different in different demographics, but in our (admittedly quite homogenous white, professional, UMC) circle it's just not a thing. Men are looking for a wife and a legacy.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 02:41 AM
1

Women need men, but once they have a man, they act in a way that says - I don't need you, I only need what you provide (provision and protection). Men need what women provide. Namely, sex, children and family, but once they have a woman, they act in a way that says - you're my whole world, I need you and can't live without you! this is a huge generalization and doesn't reflect what i've seen in the real world.
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 01:59 AM
1

interesting. i'm in my early 30s and just about all of my friends are married or soon-to-be. i do know a couple of people in very committed LTRs (have children, own properties together, etc), but they're certainly the minority and people tend to be pairing off either way. i personally don't know of any men who have opted out of LTRs altogether. i guess it depends on area and demographic. in my circles it's considered quite unusual to not be married beyond a certain age (or to be married before a…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 01:58 AM
3

oh i agree with you entirely. a male-female team is always ideal for these things! i was more referring to OPs somewhat one-sided view (which I may have misunderstood, hence asking him for clarification) that because men don't need us to cook, clean, be sexually available for them anymore that the SMP is now inherently lop-sided. things have changed on both sides of the coin to the point where neither sex really requires the other in the way that we used to. we continue to seek each other out an…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 12:59 AM
1

do we agree that men and women don't need each other anymore, but continue to pair off because there are other drives at play beyond resources, protection, sex and cooking?
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 12:31 AM
3

i did If there's anything that might bring about the next paradigm shift and pendulum swing, it will be when enough men go MGTOW
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 12:10 AM
1

ok, i'll reword it. the western world is now relatively safe for women when viewed historically. we are no longer dying from exposure, from lack of food, in childbirth, from predatory animals. sure there might be are some non-western men causing issues in some european cities, but overall women are much safer than we have been in the past, and don't need a man's protection in the same way we have in the past. don't get me wrong, i feel much safer having my husband around, but he is not necessary…
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/18 12:04 AM
4

However, women have a propensity for neurosis yes, and many men feel a drive to pair-bond and protect a woman and their children. these drives may not be strictly rational in the 2018 western world, but they exist and shape the current SMP. marriages where the woman out-earns the man are few and far between and have a much higher chance of ending in divorce this is not what i am talking about. i was saying that women no longer need the resources of a man. what they look for in a partner is a dif…
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 11:58 PM
2

Was that reply meant for me? I was agreeing with you.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 11:46 PM
5

Men have both instincts. It is in his his best interest to protect a women he's impregnated and provide resources to his offspring. It's not the only strategy but it is a common and successful one.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 11:32 PM
5

Yes exactly. Many men feel a deep satisfaction from looking after and protecting a loving wife and children. It's not difficult to inspire this feeling in a man that you look up to and respect.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 11:22 PM
27

In the same way that men no longer need women for cooking and cleaning and so on, many women do not need men for their resources and protection. The world is now safe for a western woman, her education and earning power is now pretty much on par with a man's. She can even buy sperm from a donor if she chooses. Humans continue to pair off because it feels good to do so. We don't need each other anymore, but we can and do continue to enjoy each other. It's in our nature to want a life partner to s…
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 11:13 PM
2

You don't need to be carbon copies of your friends :) I have plenty of friends who I disagree with on certain things, as long as they're good people they can still be wonderful friendships. If you're good at keeping your cool, it can actually be fun having good natured debates about things you disagree on.
/r/RedPillWomen27/02/18 01:35 AM
1

It sounds like you've made a really good start to feeling better about yourself, it's wonderful that you've been so proactive about it! You've got some great responses in here already, but I'll also offer myself as a friend :) please PM me if you'd like to chat, I'd be very happy to get to know you.
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/18 05:38 AM
5

Not a book, but I'd recommend looking into some interesting hobbies and skills to learn. It may not seem this way right now, but your late teens/early 20s will be a period of your life where you've got a great deal of free time. Use it well! Think about instruments you might like to learn, painting, rock climbing, surfing, anything! Investing your time to learn now will make you a more interesting and well rounded woman for the rest of your life. Having productive hobbies is a great habit to get…
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/18 05:31 AM
2

Sounds like things are going well. Congrats!
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/18 05:25 AM
5

When you're 20 I'd say to look at men in their late 20s. The good ones are established and settled by then, and they're not so old that you'll be widowed young. Most quality men I know started looking for a wife around 27 or so. Watch out for older single men. Beyond their early 30s or so it's very likely he's got an ex-wife and kids, or there's some kind of good reason that he's not yet married. The best ones tend to get snapped up quickly, so if they've made it so long without a marriage it's …
/r/RedPillWomen26/02/18 04:51 AM
9

Haha I don't know where you're getting the idea that I'm pissy. Men and women have different goals much of the time, making sure we're on the same page is wise. This is the extent of what I'm saying. Chill :)
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:54 AM
9

Where did I say a man should bend to our wants and needs? Quite the opposite. I'm saying we should be clear about our wants and needs on both ends so that we don't end up staying with a man who has different plans to us. How is that at all demanding?
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:48 AM
12

Most women are not pumping out babies at age 20. Say you get into your first serious relationship after college at 22, date for a few years, and it goes bad at say 26. It happens. Start a new relationship at 27, think he's committed, 30 rolls around and he's out of there. "Oh you were looking for a husband? I didn't know." This is not an usual scenario and is not slutting around. You've now got say 5 years of viability left before things seriously start to slow down. 5 years to find a new man, b…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:33 AM
3

Agreed. Women and men are very different creatures, and we are not mind readers on either side. It is very wise to clarify where you both stand. As you say, there's no need for it to be a demand, a simple question is fine though.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:22 AM
7

Women are not good at reading these cues you're speaking of. It is safer to just be honest and forthcoming with your goals rather than playing mind reader. I know far too many women who have spent a lot of time with a man who was 'acting' commited. Moving in together, holidays, support and care, and yes, making "sacrifices", but when push comes to shove he's gone. "Oh I never said I was looking for a long term thing! I never said I was interested in marriage one day! If you were looking for a hu…
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 02:18 AM
4

I'm not saying to sit down and write up a contract lol. But there's nothing weird about have a frank conversation with someone you're considering spending your life with to make sure you're on the same page.
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 01:15 AM
9

Running out of time to reproduce because a man had strung you along through your fertile years is no small problem. Men also having risks in dating does not change that fact. Is this not a community for female sexual strategy?
/r/RedPillWomen23/02/18 12:18 AM
7

But women don't think like men. How are we supposed to know what actions scream 'commitment' when they are entirely foreign to us as women? Why not just ask the man? And what about the woman who (like most women) wants to marry one day. How should she figure out if this is in her guy's plan? All this guesswork is very dangerous for women.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 08:11 PM
4

My husband has a couple of female friends that he's very close to, but they're butch lesbian types that are involved in his hobbies. I feel no threat whatsoever, they're just like his male friends. There's a couple of exes floating around trying to spend time with him, which I am not so cool with. We'll see them from time to time, but always as a unit. It's not a good look for a married/commited man to be socialising with exes in my opinion. In the same manner, I've got a couple of gay friends, …
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 05:50 AM
11

Agreed. Commitment is far more complicated than sex, and with a short fertile window women need to know that you have complementary goals if she's going to invest precious time in you.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 05:40 AM
25

I think this is a poor analogy. A woman will show her attraction to you by having sex. There's no ambiguity there. A man may act like he's committed to you, but unless you have the conversation and make exclusivity clear, you have no idea if he's seeing other women on the side. You also have no idea what 'commitment' means to him. If you're a woman aiming to marry, you need to find out his views on this and make sure you're not wasting each other's time.
/r/RedPillWomen22/02/18 05:39 AM
1

I'm looking for as many opinions as possible from the three subs I like and respect. Many of the responses have told me straight up to leave him. This is not an option for me right now, so I'm looking for advice on how to manage his temper and turn things around in the long term. I'm not sure why your getting aggressive over this, I'm just looking for advice.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/17 09:51 AM
1

I told him that I can't stay in the same house as him until he has a plan to deal with his temper. He's turned it all around on me, saying that I push him and push him until he snaps. Told me I'm emotionally abusive.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/17 02:47 AM
1

Yeah, I think I need some space anyway, and hopefully that will let him know that this can't go on. He's messaging me now wanting to make up, and I've told him that I need space. He's offered to go stay with his family until I'm ready, so I might take him up on that.
/r/RedPillWives15/12/17 12:29 AM
1

I really don't know, honestly. If they'd had a happy marriage prior to this last 6 months or so, I think I'd tell her to work at it. Maybe spend some time apart and only come back under the condition that he does some kind of therapy or something. I just don't know :(
/r/RedPillWives15/12/17 12:28 AM
1

Thank you <3 I have asked him to see a therapist once before, but it was immediately after a fight and he refused. After the last fight he told me he thought it happened because we've recently starting discussing having children, and he had a really awful upbringing. He said he was stressed about whether he could raise a functional family and was self-sabotaging. We talked a lot, I reassured him and told him he'd make a wonderful father. Things settled down for a short while. I would love for hi…
/r/RedPillWives15/12/17 12:21 AM
1

Thank you, it is hard :( After the last big fight I went out for a long walk the next day to clear my head, and he started texting me saying "I love you like crazy, I miss you" etc etc. I wrote back to him saying please to not ever speak to me again the way he had spoken to me the night before, and he told me he regretted it, he was sorry, and so on. We booked a weekend away to recover together, he sincerely apologized and I told him I'd try harder not to upset him. I really thought we were ok. …
/r/RedPillWives14/12/17 10:56 PM
3

Sorry, I think you may have misread that? I asked how not having a title would benefit her. /u/loneliness-inc was asking her why she wants him to call her his gf, and I'm saying that's a silly question to ask. It seems obvious that she, and all women, should strive for their commitment to be recognized.
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/17 06:50 AM
1

How does not having a title in the relationship assist her sexual/relationship strategy?
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/17 02:24 AM
1

it's perfectly normal to want a title in your relationship, it's an indicator of your status and that he's willing to display that status to your community. i don't think you're being at all insecure in wanting that title of girlfriend. if it isn't something you've spoken about openly, i wouldn't call it a red flag. you don't know his reasons, it could just be an oversight. i would approach him in a warm and open way, without any accusation, and tell him that it's bothering you. tell him you fee…
/r/RedPillWomen25/10/17 12:51 AM
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