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librarylady1980 Archive

View 0 posts and 44 comments by librarylady1980 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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15

Thank you for sharing this. The self reflection and growth you've had is amazing and you should be so proud of yourself. In terms of resume gap... I didn't work for almost two years to work on my mental health and to just live a simple and happy life. I had the financial means to do it, so instead of "waiting for retirement" I went ahead and took the time to do things I wanted to do (and sometimes what I wanted to do was nothing LOL). When it came time to start working again, I dreaded the quest…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 10:46 AM
3

Willie Nelson's gospel album is soooo good!
/r/RedPillWomen21/04/21 10:48 PM
4

I enjoy HGTV magazine for decorating. I also agree with others, Southern Living is good.
/r/RedPillWomen07/04/21 12:08 PM
4

Speaking as someone who is married to a porn addict, porn of any type in and of itself is bad (in my experience and situation...not trying to start a debate on porn). If the issue was child porn, I would have been gone long ago. Prison record or not, you have to ask yourself...would be comfortable having children with this man? Would you be comfortable having this man around your friend's and family's children?
/r/RedPillWomen20/10/20 09:40 AM
2

Mine is super colorful too. I love color, I ain't scared!
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/20 07:37 PM
1

So I love and hate Sex in the City...but the episode when Carrie marries herself and registers for her stolen shoes is epic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 12:09 PM
18

Gosh, I think of curly/wavy hair as the epitome of feminine. It's a "wow" moment for me that others don't. But alas, I don't have waves or curls, so I guess I see it as the grass being greener on the other side type of thing.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/20 01:40 AM
8

I feel this so hard. In my 20s, I was a pickmeisha and just wanted anybody, somebody to love me (or "love" me since I didn't know what love was and I really needed to love myself). I got with a guy who checked off all the items on my "list"...but he was abusive and narcissistic, a truly shit human being. And when I finally got out, thank God, I felt like I had failed as a woman...because a good woman is supposed to be able to "fix" a man right? Ughhhhhh so much wrong with this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 11:31 AM
61

And everyone saying behind your back "oh she's such a bitch"...uggghhhhhhh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 01:09 PM
2

Great points!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 10:59 PM
3

Absolutely this!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 10:52 PM
0

I like this. And I like and admire that you have the confidence and sense of self worth to know you had/have that choice. Seriously, that's awesome. And I say this coming from a place of just now seeing my own worth and having the confidence to know I have choices and that I don't have to be "the cool girl" to get/keep a man or be valued by men. It's unfortunate that so many of us drank the kool aid that we had to be promiscuous to be cool or valued or wanted or that in order to "take control of…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 10:31 PM
4

What great timing with this question! I watched an OxfordUnion talk this morning, with Pamela Anderson and Rabbi Shmuley Boteach, about the dangers of porn and one of the things Pam Anderson said that resonated with me a lot was that (paraphrasing) the sexual revolution actually created a culture in which women and men don't feel special to one another anymore (and said the same for same sex relationships as well) and that in light of what happened with the sexual revolution, we now need a sensu…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/20 10:24 PM
4

So I've been watching a lot of old school tv shows recently, and I have to say I love how the women on Designing Women deal with things like this. I think the character Julia Sugarbaker does a fantastic job of dealing with bullshit in a classy yet firm way (whether you agree with what she says or not). She is a total lady and a badass at the same time.
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/20 11:57 AM
6

Her fans...her OnlyFans you mean?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 01:14 AM
3

I honestly don't know anything at all about Taylor swift...legit asking, what makes her a strong feminist and fds role model? (I don't listen to her music, but if her songs are about true female empowerment, maybe I need to check her out.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 06:11 AM
54

And the fact that these women have the means to hire personal trainers, personal chefs, top of the line health care, etc
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 03:02 PM
3

A Different World (that show was my jam back in the day!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 05:45 AM
15

And it stems from your "insecurities"...ummm whut?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 05:42 AM
12

Masturbation and porn are not the same thing.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 01:54 PM
8

OP isn't trying to impose her views on everyone else, she's trying to create and maintain a healthy relationship for herself and her husband. Porn use is not healthy period. Porn isn't about expressing sexuality...if you really think about, there's very little sexuality in porn, it's just fucking and getting good camera angles of body parts. That's not real. Porn is not real sex. And using porn for "education"? NO. I also, like OP, did not grow up religious...I am not "constrained" by religion. …
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 01:00 PM
4

Exactly! You don't have to just go along with something out of "respect for that person's autonomy"...when we enter into a partnership with another person, we lose some of our autonomy...it's not just about me anymore, it's about US. So if I'm doing something that is hurting my partner, I need to examine that and make changes. Porn is disrespectful to humanity overall.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 12:54 PM
14

Very much so. So now when I'm called a prude or people say I'm not "sex positive", I let it roll off my back. My husband knows I'm no prude, and that's all that matters. And being antiporn is absolutely sex positive...porn kills real sex.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 12:51 PM
3

One of the amazing things about being a woman is that we have an incredible intuition and "gut". For me, I always knew my husband watched porn (but ya know, I was "cool" with it, I was the "cool wife", I wasn't "crazy" and "insecure" like all the others...blech!), but I had a gut feeling things were getting worse. And I was right. And every gut feeling I've had since that discovery day has been right. So I always tell other women, trust your gut. And even now, 10 months since my husband started …
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 12:48 PM
2

It's not controlling to set boundaries about this and it doesn't stem from your lacking self esteem or having insecurities. It's not a YOU problem. If your SO respects you and your relationship, they will be willing to not watch porn. If it's not a big deal for them, they can easily let it go.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:52 AM
11

I'm so glad you pointed out that masturbation and porn are not the same thing.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:47 AM
4

Truth! "Sex sells"...so it's EVERYWHERE. I'm so tired of it. I'm tired of seeing it normalized, I'm tired of seeing women sexualized alllllll the time, I'm just tired of it all. Nothing is sacred anymore. PM me if you ever want to talk. This is a topic I am passionate about and if nothing else good comes from my situation, helping other women through this is the silver lining. I used to be "cool" with it (but I wasn't...but I wanted to be the "cool girl" and thought that's how you keep a man). N…
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:39 AM
-1

If it's a deal breaker for OP, that's all that matters here. If you're okay with it, then cool, you do you. OP is not okay with it.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:26 AM
5

And that's the most important thing right there, if it's wrong to you and your relationship, that's all that matters. It doesn't matter that everyone else is all "it's no big deal" and "you're just insecure" and "all men do it" blah blah blah.
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:24 AM
4

I remember this post and I had saved it because you did such a phenomenal job of articulating on this!
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:22 AM
7

It's not an insecurity issue...it's not a YOU problem. This goes against your religious beliefs, your moral compass, and your concept of monogamy. Porn IS a big deal. I am married to a porn addict....I am still with him only because he has taken the necessary steps to change. Addict or not, though, there is no place for porn in a relationship. Porn kills love. Porn kills respect. When they watch porn and masturbate to it, the brain can't distinguish between that and real sex with a partner...the…
/r/RedPillWomen21/06/20 11:21 AM
7

Go over to r/loveafterporn for support. We do not have to be "cool" about porn in our relationships.
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/20 05:38 AM
20

Or this one..."I'm fine with porn...it isn't cheating...it's no big deal...all men do it...it's totally normal...only insecure women have a problem with it...I'm not a nag like other women..." All it got me was a marriage with a porn addict because I didn't love myself enough to honor my true feelings...because I wanted so badly to be "cool"
/r/RedPillWomen15/06/20 04:52 AM
11

Yes! When I was teaching, I was reading a book called One Night Stands in American History...it was small points of interest about historical events...the first part of the title was bold and big, the "in American History" part was smaller...one of my students saw it and was all "ummm WHAT are you reading?!". I can only imagine if it was a book with the word porn in the title! Ughhhhhh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 04:15 AM
7

Right, that argument doesn't explain the popularity of 976 numbers back in the day or the gone wild audio or the erotic ASMR.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:44 AM
33

Most women don't want to be pounded for an hour. I'll take 10 minutes of amazing sex with a partner who is completely in the moment with me over an hour of watching his face as he tries to last longer by thinking of porn, mediocre sex any day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:43 AM
5

I just saved it and I'm going to make it the wallpaper on my laptop!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:39 AM
11

I fucking love your list and it's inspired me to make me own!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:38 AM
17

I think his friends are absolutely a reflection of him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:34 AM
12

You are my fucking hero.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 02:33 AM
3

Saving this post as a reference to go back to continuously. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 09:51 AM
2

But at least it makes a little bit harder on these sites, a little more of a headache. Like, I know if an addict wants to get their fix, they'll get it, but I'm sure as shit not going to let it be easy for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/19 02:26 PM
6

Zones out or in his head during sex... big YES on that one!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/19 12:43 AM
14

I always thought my husband having a lot of "platonic" female friends was a good thing, showed he could maintain healthy appropriate relationships with women blah blah blah....and then I found out he's a porn addict. And since one of my boundaries is now transparency with devices and accounts, I have read all of his FB messages with said girls...and boy was he crossing boundaries! Not in an overtly sexual way, but he was all about being the "white Knight" guy friend who was always "there for the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/19 12:37 AM
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