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likethemonkey Archive

View 1 posts and 150 comments by likethemonkey on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

I don’t think OP has a job nor hobbies
/r/seduction08/09/21 08:57 PM
1

Tinder is how I met my wife.
/r/seduction08/09/21 08:56 PM
6

You stopped short on important details. What did you do on the date? Did you dress well for it or just wear your work clothes? It takes two to tango. In the same way you react to her behavior, she could have been reacting to yours. You discuss the kino but little else. Too many responses here are putting the onus on her for not acting the way you expect her to. The first date is just an interview and you didn’t get the job. Buck up and be a better date.
/r/seduction22/08/21 05:12 PM
1

My craziest story: met a girl on the elevator of my building. She was visiting some dudes in a band that lived in the building and I was going in to grab a jacket before heading back out. I took a chance and invited her to keep talking to me. She walked into my apartment. We were making out within 3 minutes of meeting each other. She was giving me head before I gave her my name. We fucked twice that afternoon. Then I had to kick her out and run to go see a client. Gave her my card but never hear…
/r/seduction21/08/21 05:53 AM
1

Yes I do.
/r/seduction09/08/21 04:57 PM
47

"Lunch break" is a common term used for the break required for work shifts that last longer than 6hrs in America. While it used to refer to the meal we eat at noon, the shifting of work culture to include more and more later shifts did not adjust the term so some people still say "lunch break" despite working the second or third shift of a job.
/r/seduction03/06/21 04:40 PM
2

To your point, it doesn’t seem to be his concern and it doesn’t seem to be yours, either. It doesn’t have to be. Or it can be. That is your choice. You seem to also set up this straw man argument by turning it into someone that is afraid of their own shadow and I’m not here to argue this extreme example you set up. Also, your finding someone unattractive is different from feeling physically unsafe. Good luck to you, sir.
/r/seduction02/06/21 03:14 AM
1

Like I said, good luck.
/r/seduction02/06/21 03:09 AM
2

You keep setting up this straw man. I am telling you that people I know personally sometimes feel threatened. It is possible for you to accept that as true while still believing that it is worth it for you to pursue in situations where the person looks visibly disinterested. Again, it is something I have done in my past. To ask yourself whether or not you are doing harm is not the end of the world nor does it condemn your actions. It is to be reflective.
/r/seduction02/06/21 01:56 AM
1

Yes. I worked as a matchmaker and dating consultant and keep tabs on how the scene changes.
/r/seduction02/06/21 01:48 AM
4

We're getting into a meta-disagreement about conversation flow and I don't think that's helpful. I'm going to aim to avoid that. Thinking about physical safety (dark spaces, confinement), while helpful, is not the end of it. Again, you're focusing on how you perceive safety. I'm trying to tell you that women do not perceive it that way. You can disagree — I don't think I'm going to change your opinion on that. Good luck to you.
/r/seduction01/06/21 09:51 PM
5

I am asking you for points of clarification in a thread where someone is asking for advice. I do not believe that taking a woman's feelings of safety into account is a pointless rabbit hole of hypotheticals. You can and that's fine, I'm not here to change your opinion. Seeking indicators of interest does not seem like a big ask. I do not assume you are violent nor a creep. I do think there are times where we are misinterpreted and there is a big difference between intent and impact. You answered…
/r/seduction01/06/21 08:16 PM
10

I asked the question because your post assumed absolutes ("That's a limiting belief and it's totally wrong") and seems to focus on how it made you feel without discussion of post-conversation results. I also asked because I have talked to women, including my wife, who tell me about these kinds of interactions from the other side. Yes, it would be ridiculous to assume the straw man you just posited. I didn't assume that. I asked you a question about your results. You specifically reference approa…
/r/seduction01/06/21 07:31 PM
50

How often did the conversation with the disinterested girl extend beryond that single interaction? How do you know she wasn't, as my wife and friends tell me they often do, just keeping you placated because she has a fear of men getting violent when things don't go their way?
/r/seduction01/06/21 03:48 PM
2

or call the police ? Hi emergency? Yes, someone is smiling at me with his eyes. Yes, he's wearing a mask. Arrest him immediately.
/r/seduction24/05/21 03:01 PM
-2

Interesting. You thought my comment was unneccessary and then made a comment on it. I thought your comment as unnecessary and yet, here I am...
/r/seduction23/05/21 08:17 PM
3

Don't tie yourself down with what you think society thinks you should say/do. ... unless what you want to do involves harming someone else physically or mentally, and/or is considered illegal.
/r/seduction23/05/21 05:24 PM
1

You want 1 or 2 times a week to be okay.
/r/seduction17/05/21 05:59 PM
0

Don't make or buy coffee. When offered it, ask for a glass of water instead.
/r/seduction17/05/21 05:58 PM
1

Your logic is fun. You say the sun wasn't meant to be harmful but it is now due to fucked ozone layer — yet you stop short of recommending we adjust our behavior to account for the fucked ozone layer.
/r/seduction17/05/21 05:55 PM
3

1) Video humanizes you in a way photos can't — if they find you less attractive in photos they're likely to find you less attractive in-person 2) Same concept as above. You can also work on your voice. 3) With good lighting, clean and tidy is likely enough. You're not giving them a tour — just enough to signal you've got your shit together.
/r/seduction10/05/21 04:56 PM
7

https://lmgtfy.app/?q=exercises+to+deepen+voice But seriously, Puberty gave me a relatively deep voice despite my size and frame, but doing some voice exercises over the years probably helped. Also: drink water first — even now, I'll drop an octave with a few sips learn to relax your throat through meditation, breathing exercises, and therapy — you're likely carrying extra tension around your vocal chords
/r/seduction10/05/21 04:52 PM
43

I agree and would like to add: when you consider the context — that there are a lot of dudes who aggressively flip out, demand explanations, or start arguing — it's helpful to signal that you're not a d-bag.
/r/seduction10/05/21 04:45 PM
2

Dude, I'm not a coworker or neighbor. There's no reason for imaginary fears about me, or anyone else that looks at your reddit account, holding your therapy as a secret over you. It's relevant to the conversation because you seem to have very strong opinions about therapy — something you specifically describe as between two people in a private room. Your opinions on therapy are much stronger and more valid if you've experienced it yourself since there is no way for you to form opinions from obse…
/r/seduction09/05/21 08:56 PM
2

Again, have you done therapy? You seem to writing off an entire profession because it doesn’t have perfect information. Have you written off doctors because there are still new medical discoveries being made? Are economists quacks because their understanding of economic systems keep shifting? You’re working really hard at writing off a field that no successful person, aside from Tom Cruise, disagrees with. What makes you an expert?
/r/seduction09/05/21 05:06 PM
2

Therapists are attempting to change you for the better from their experience but even hedge fund managers make the wrong bets sometimes. In my experience the person who knows your bias the best is the person living it. In the same way it would be ill-advised for a lawyer to represent themselves at court, for a surgeon to operate on themselves, or for a professional athlete to coach themselves — it is objectively better to have a professional guide you through certain situations despite how well …
/r/seduction08/05/21 09:05 PM
3

It worked for me because I was willing to put in the time to seek the right therapist and modality that works for me, at that moment in life. It's not a silver bullet. It's also not a "fix" that lasts forever. You continue to change and grow and the issues you address change and grow. It sounds like you're saying self-awareness is of low value. Is that correct?
/r/seduction07/05/21 09:05 PM
10

Reframe that. It's applying time to muck around in your own head. With a trained professional.
/r/seduction07/05/21 06:38 PM
10

Finding a good therapist is as hard as dating, apartment hunting, or job seeking. It's trying a lot of different people and modalities on until something feels right. Sometimes, you get all you can and it's time to move on to something new.
/r/seduction07/05/21 06:37 PM
8

Marketers use psychology. Economists use psychology. That does not make them therapists. Financial advisors use psychology and talk to you about your personal life and help you. They are also not therapists. While there are many different modalities of therapy that look and feel very different from each other, there is a specific taxonomy of experiences from a specific type of professional with a specific type of education that is legitimately therapy. A dating coach is not that.
/r/seduction07/05/21 06:34 PM
1

What makes you feel qualified to call yourself an expert? You are making claims on all women because you spoke to one?
/r/seduction28/04/21 08:45 PM
1

While I believe increasing your empathy will help you out in life, i'm not trying to convince you of anything besides: that your posts are falling on deaf ears. You're directing your messages at those you're frustrated at, despite their not being here. What happens when you try to have these conversations with women in-person?
/r/seduction28/04/21 06:44 PM
0

for your priviliged "feel sorry for me cause I'm so picky" problems I'm a married man. I don't have those problems. You seem to conflate the people you're addressing with the people that you believe frustrate you. That's not helpful in discourse.
/r/seduction28/04/21 06:14 PM
-1

So this whole "try to imagine how though it is for us women" mentality is just laughable. Your lack of empathy could not be summarized any better.
/r/seduction28/04/21 05:53 PM
-2

Perhaps using a 300lb person was a clumsy way of saying "someone that you're not likely attracted to" — would that have been more helpful? Also, to clarify, you spoke to a you (OP's friend) in hopes that... the message gets conveyed? I'm asking: why did you direct your statements to a "you" that isn't here?
/r/seduction28/04/21 04:38 PM
-9

Who is "you" in your response? You seem to be angry at OP — she's a woman who's dating someone. She's not single, not looking, and said nothing about equality or finding men who make more than her. You seem to have taken the anger you have towards women and placed it into this one post. What was the point of your message? Get therapy. You're going to need it if you want to have any sort of sustainable relationship.
/r/seduction28/04/21 03:44 PM
5

Is the goal of online dating 1) to receive attention from strangers you'll never meet or 2) to date someone you actually like?
/r/seduction28/04/21 03:38 PM
2

It's tough to tell someone that, as opposed to a specific set of beliefs, they should go on an open and free journey across different books and be open to new experiences. While it's "correct," it's not exactly specific and actionable advice. I recommend they read Models by Mark Manson. He's former PUA and has a pretty good outlook on the whole thing. It's mainly self-improvement, being vulnerable, and being honest. He writes a fair amount on self-improvement so it's also a good lead on more pos…
/r/ExRedPill23/03/21 08:42 PM
0

When people hear the word superior to a person, they think "ruling" them. We all know that people don't like being restricted from doing anything. No, people like a worthy partner to have them submit to them. Once again this needs a little explanation. There are a lot of "strong and independent" people out there. Hell, a person reading this may consider themselves as such. However, people hate the burden that being strong and independent puts on them, so they wants a partner who they can relinqu…
/r/seduction12/03/21 07:23 PM
31

I once showed up to a Tinder date to see a woman 6 inches taller than me (I'm 5'6). We went on the day date (classical music on a barge — we snuck in whiskey coffees). We held hands while walking on the sidewalk, away from the dock. As we walked past a building with steps leading up, I gave her hand a little tug, walked up a couple steps so I would be her height, and we kissed. She was very smily and said she was impressed. I've dated a number of women who are taller than me. Height can be an is…
/r/seduction06/03/21 05:46 PM
0

Okay so therefore treat all women the same and never be yourself? How insightful.
/r/seduction09/01/21 07:33 PM
6

Same could be said for The Office or Game of Thrones
/r/seduction25/11/20 10:32 PM
11

We learn how to be adults from our parents. It sounds like your sister has fallen into the pattern that your mom inherited. Unfortunately, it is up to you to break the pattern. Therapy. Therapy. Therapy. You need to relearn the patterns you have developed. They helped you survive up to this point, but they will not take you where you want to be.
/r/ExRedPill05/09/20 09:09 PM
1

Do you plan on answering the question of how many women you consulted with before forming this strategy?
/r/seduction20/05/20 05:38 PM
1

It’s a great sample size to see how you respond to women. Thanks for your TED Talk.
/r/seduction20/05/20 05:37 PM
2

Empathy is also very basic to being a human being. In this thread, of the three women who have said anything so far, the only response you have given includes suggestions to the woman on what SHE needs to do better. Let me ask: in your real life, how many women have you talked to about this? How many women (that you know and trust) have given you their thoughts about being approached by complete strangers when they are alone?
/r/seduction20/05/20 03:35 PM
-1

Instead of your impact on others, I invite you to narcissism. Focus on your release, not the stains.
/r/seduction20/05/20 02:12 AM
4

You’re not ever going to get with “the vast majority of women” Game does not rid them of that toxic belief. Your goal could be to meet and be normal with the people who do not have that toxic belief.
/r/seduction19/05/20 06:13 PM
7

Telling the truth is an option an option that doesn’t get what you want, but it’s an option. In the same way, if something is too expensive, stealing is an option. To not steal is also an option. Therefore: everyone should steal what they can’t afford.
/r/seduction17/05/20 05:10 PM
1

I'm not selling anything. I'm also not obligated to do any of that. I also don't assume I'm an expert on marriages. I believe it's okay to make observations about trends I see. Something about this observation seems to have made you upset -- may I ask why? An easy fix would be to place your name and credentials on your site. Instead, here you are.
/r/seduction06/05/20 07:22 PM
2

From what I've experienced, nothing you've read is comprehensive. People don't fit into neat little buckets and they grow and develop in different ways. Some experience traumas that others don't and some are given advice (good or bad) that others aren't. Think about yourself, for instance. You're probably not exactly like a Natural nor a Neckbeard. You are unique and have different experiences that guide you in different ways than others. So your reactions to social interaction will be different…
/r/seduction06/05/20 07:17 PM
1

I've been there. For over three years, I chased after a specific person. We had been on dates and made out but it never got anywhere and I stuck around and her friend with a crush for years. She knew. I knew. We all knew. We had lived in the same town but we both moved to different places. Around the three year mark, after going through rounds of hot/cold from here, she said on one of our extremely long phone calls that she just broke up with her boyfriend for good. Turns out it was a three year…
/r/seduction06/05/20 07:05 PM
1

Thanks but I'm married. I've worked in dating consulting and matchmaking and hang out here to see what the current interests/opinions are. It's quite fascinating.
/r/seduction06/05/20 06:53 PM
2

Did/do you believe her when she said that?
/r/seduction06/05/20 04:23 PM
1

What’s fascinating about these posts that link back to some sort of business site is that none of these men show their real names or photos on their site. If you’re so confident about your methods, why not own up to them?
/r/seduction06/05/20 04:01 PM
3

It’s okay to hate the mental games. It is not okay to hate women as they do not ALL play these games and as a lot of MEN play these games. If you hate the games, stop playing them and seek people who don’t play either.
/r/seduction06/05/20 03:59 PM
3

Because she misses her friend? Because she’s also a person with feelings and got confused about why a person she considered close suddenly got cold with her so she wants to make sure it wasn’t her fault? That’s why she reached out. Because she’s a person with feelings.
/r/seduction06/05/20 03:57 PM
19

My comment is less about the attempt at growth and more about the didactic nature of his post and the absolutes used in his statements. I also mention the hints of narcissism in other responses found below. I've also done the work in bettering my dating life. I've made mistakes and use my learning and experiences to help others. I don't always shit on posts here, but this one had some negative tones mixed in with the positive message so I wanted to say something about it.
/r/seduction04/05/20 07:14 PM
3

If I understand your comment correctly, you're implying there is only one "game" and everyone is playing by the same rules. I'm trying to say that you attract what you put out — and it's that's a false sense of confidence to mask insecurities, then you'll get that. If it's a bunch of rules-based dating, then you'll get that. If it's vulnerability and compassion, you'll get that too. Sure, you might get rejected by the women who are operating with false confidence or women with rules-based dating…
/r/seduction04/05/20 06:58 PM
8

I believe there was miscommunication there. Let me rephrase that so we don't get hung up on the unimportant part. That's true. At some point in my life, I rode my bike around my neighborhood and kicked garbage cans because it was exciting. A woman can find that attractive and seek that. A woman can also decide it's childish behavior and seek something that would be better suited to the life she wants for herself. The point is, some women do play the game because it's more exciting, but it's chil…
/r/seduction04/05/20 06:47 PM
1

I hear you and I agree with you. I don't shit on all posts that I disagree with on this sub. I said this in another post, OP has hints of narcissism and speaks in absolutes. It neither encourages compassion nor vulnerability. To say women are driven by emotion implies men aren't. What drove them to this sub, logic? What logic causes the emptiness that needs to be filled with getting laid? What logic causes men to feel lonely at night? OP assumes he knows what women are thinking. Says to never ad…
/r/seduction04/05/20 06:44 PM
8

That's true. At some point in my life, I rode my bike around my neighborhood and kicked garbage cans because it was exciting. A woman can chose to find that attractive and seek that. A woman can also chose that's childish behavior and seek something that would be better suited to the life she wants for herself.
/r/seduction04/05/20 06:32 PM
1

You are correct. And if your goal is for your seduction techniques to only attract game-players, then by all means go right on ahead. I chose to associate myself with those that are more authentic and open to vulnerability.
/r/seduction04/05/20 06:28 PM
20

I hear you and I agree with your general sentiment. My disagreement is with the specific way OP is disseminating advice -- the assumption of correctness in absolutes. "Never confess your feelings" does not give you room to have an intimate moment. "Now she is thinking about me" ... or her studies, or her loneliness, or her friends who have boyfriends, or anything else. The general message OP conveys hints at narcissism as he doesn't seem to consider other aspects of his crush's life — just him. …
/r/seduction04/05/20 06:26 PM
5

Yup. If you're looking to get laid, why not find a prostitute? The transaction is more obvious and you are more likely to get what you're specifically asking for. If you are seeking emotional fulfillment and the chance to be vulnerable around another human being, playing games from the get-go established a standard for future interactions. But hey, fill that hole-in-your-soul with whatever you want. If it's a sloppy lay, enjoy the junk food. If you're seeking something healthier... maybe you don…
/r/seduction04/05/20 03:01 PM
12

Simp detected! lol -- quick, no one tell my wife! ​ This also depends on age Instead of age, how about emotional maturity? So you can seek someone who's emotionally mature or someone that's not. Your choice.
/r/seduction04/05/20 02:56 PM
9

This assumes everyone has the same rules -- I was never given a pamphlet, were you? We make our own rules for who we choose to be in relationships with, whether it be friendships or significant others. The goal, as far as I understand it, is not to attract all women -- it's not event to attract most women. It's to attract the right women. And if you believe that women who play games are the right women, then go on ahead. You have the option. No one makes your choices for you.
/r/seduction04/05/20 02:35 PM
303

You "finally got laid" and you're now giving advice that assumes you know what's happening in someone else's mind? A little presumptuous, don't you think? "Never confess your feelings to your crush" sounds like game-playing to me. What kind of person do you attract when you play games? People that like playing games!
/r/seduction04/05/20 01:09 PM
1

lol I promise you, there are more than 2 types of girls. To assume any type of person fits in a bucket that well assumes that they cannot change. If people don't change, neither can you, and that is never the case. I have absolutely nothing against having close guy friends but it's definitely not an either-or unless someone sets it up that way. Find you some people that you can be vulnerable with and that encourage growth and personal development. That applies for your partner and your friends.
/r/seduction06/04/20 02:56 PM
1

I'm in my late thirties and am amazed at what I'm still discovering in my therapy. Things that I could have addressed much earlier, but it took a while or a different methodology to suss it out. Things from my early childhood. Trauma. Things from my later teen years. Anxiety caused by how I reacted to trauma. Even with good techniques, changing it up is good. My wife did EMDR for a while and it worked wonders but then she moved on to somatic therapy and that's helped build on top of the foundati…
/r/ExRedPill01/04/20 04:10 PM
2

What types of therapy and how many sessions/what amount of time did you spend on each? I've done 2+ years of group therapy. Around 3 years of talk therapy. My wife and I have done about 1 year of combined couples therapy. I have now been doing about 2 years of somatic therapy with a focus on orgone therapy. Therapy has been one of the best things in my life and I give it credit for helping me past the patterns and habits that limited my thinking about how I felt about others. I am not convention…
/r/ExRedPill01/04/20 03:01 PM
1

Numb is not normal. The lack of feeling is a key symptom of depression. I'm not trying to argue with you, I'm sharing the experiences I have learned from years of therapy and being with many people that have been through therapy. My wife often goes through depressive states and the numbness is definitely a defining characteristic. There are also many types of therapy and they vary greatly in methods and results. CBT vs EMDR vs talk-therapy vs somatic therapy are very different. Different therapi…
/r/ExRedPill30/03/20 05:08 PM
6

Being numb is a sign of depression. You may believe you don't have the anxiety anymore, but that's probably because you have found a coping mechanism in the form of not-feeling your emotions. That is not attractive in a relationship. Seek counseling or therapy. If it's not available in your area, try finding it online (it's how most therapy is being done now during quarantines). You seem to have this idea that people have negative views of virginity and I want to ask who you talked to and how yo…
/r/ExRedPill30/03/20 01:31 PM
2

Fear and danger is subjective
/r/seduction29/03/20 06:50 PM
45

Hotel room. It's amazing that the focus of this story isn't on the fact that she's an out-of-towner. Think about the difference that made in HER mindset. You got someone who wanted an adventure while traveling. Congrats but I think it's equally important to discuss what was different about HER night, compared to her usual.
/r/seduction02/03/20 07:37 PM
-2

Again, you do you. Play games, get games. Signed, Former PUA-tactics-user that reformed & is getting married this month (the difference was empathy)
/r/seduction06/02/20 12:50 AM
1

So everyone in history has gone to a harem? I’m simply saying there’s more than one way to think about this because there are many types of people in the world. There is no one-size-fits-all.
/r/seduction06/02/20 12:44 AM
0

If by high value you mean: women with anxieties and insecurities that happen to react to your attempts at being something you’re not, then do march on. Or, maybe that is the true you and you enjoy manipulating people — you do you. You play games, you get games. Good luck out there.
/r/seduction06/02/20 12:42 AM
2

We have been doing it the other way and professing love for hundreds of years and, somehow, we exist. Maybe your one-size-fits-all answer is wrong. Could it be that some people play games and others don’t?
/r/seduction06/02/20 12:35 AM
5

“girls are retarded” That’s a great attitude to have and I’m sure you will find yourself in a loving and respectful relationship one day. Alternately, girls are people and every person comes from a different background with different experiences and anxieties. Being flexible and comfortable adapting to an individual’s behavior makes you attractive, as opposed to seeking a single silver bullet. But hey, it’s easier to believe in shortcuts, isn’t it?
/r/seduction05/02/20 11:03 PM
8

getting married and having all types of sexual adventures I feel like I'm missing out on. Just to reset some standards for you: getting married and having all types of sexual adventures are, for the majority, at opposite ends of a spectrum.
/r/ExRedPill31/08/19 07:00 PM
3

It sounds like you don't want to hear what people are telling you. You seem to have a rigid belief about your self worth and are seeking to find someone to change your opinion. I offered to chat with you after your last post. This is the kind of work I do as a profession. You have every opportunity to send me a message. I can help. It doesn't sound like you want the help, though. You seem to be taking a fundamentally subjective notion -- attraction -- and have assigned an objective truth to it. …
/r/ExRedPill28/08/19 11:42 PM
3

A lot of other folks here are making great points. I just want to highlight the part that tells you this data is insignificant. I have to assume that in general females find the same men attractive. I think this is the biggest flaw in this analysis, but currently there is no other way to analyze the data. "I can't think of another way of doing this" neither instills confidence nor validates the information. In case this needs to be stated, women do not find the same men attractive.
/r/ExRedPill23/08/19 02:18 PM
4

Learn to be good at doing something that you like. Think about another time when humanity awes at something beautiful: a diver doing a perfect dive into water, a sculpture that takes a lot of skill, or a musician playing skillfully. In all of those scenarios, someone spent a lot of time to get really good at something. That's attractive. Pick something. Get good at it. Someone will find that attractive.
/r/ExRedPill22/08/19 09:27 PM
35

I have a thin frame. I have acne scars. I am the broke son of poor non-english speaking immigrants in America. I am under 5'7. I used to believe these things were the problem. They were not. I have slept with over 40 women and kissed over 160. Those statistics do not make me any happier but you seen to focus on these metrics so there they are. I am not an asshole nor an alpha. I am not an artist. You have a way out but you are currently your biggest obstacle. Therapy is not something you "try" a…
/r/ExRedPill09/07/19 08:21 PM
2

I agree with everything here but need to remind everyone that this cycle, for the woman and for the man, can be broken with proper effort. It's recognizing it and changing the pattern. It often involves therapy. Some people are able to properly rechannel this energy into other parts of their lives but that's not something everyone can hope for. We all create coping mechanisms, it helps us survive our childhoods. They're healthy for some people and they aren't for others — we shouldn't judge the …
/r/ExRedPill01/02/19 06:44 PM
3

Like you, she is a person. Like you, she has fears and worries. She is not always sure of herself. She has feelings and flaws and has made mistakes, just like you. Her parents have passed down things to her — whether she likes it or not — and she has learned how to be an adult from them. She is a person, and so are you.
/r/seduction07/01/19 09:40 PM
4

Therapy. It does not mean you're crazy, it does not mean "something is wrong with you." Most people are affected by things from their past and just need some clarity in moving past it. It might be painful, but transformation is never easy.
/r/seduction04/01/19 07:19 PM
2

Are you interested in being an actual friend ho happens to hook up or are you looking for a multiple-night-stand? Becoming friends with someone is one thing. Being a fuckbuddy is another.
/r/seduction30/12/18 08:58 PM
1

Demonstrating frustrations publicly online is how we find community when we don't see it physically around us, right? That's the point of some subreddits, yes? I agree there's additional intentions — "shame on you" seems like one.
/r/seduction15/12/18 05:33 PM
2

I think that's a difference of interpretation right there. Imagine being a manager and having a front-of-house worker coming to you to complain that a customer gave you their number — what would you do with that? There's a line of customers waiting and you want to deal with this workers' grief over being hit on? I interpreted this as a way for her to commiserate with her followers. This is Instagram, a medium that skews female. There is no private female social media if she wanted to avoid showi…
/r/seduction15/12/18 05:30 PM
9

Is it possible that this was a way to demonstrate her frustrations from being hit on at work?
/r/seduction12/12/18 07:34 PM
1

You insisted on seeing her tinder? On a date? How did that conversation go? That doesn’t seem like a very normal thing to do. How did the rest of the date go? Is that typical behavior for you?
/r/seduction29/11/18 02:13 PM
9

Tell them the truth. Do the normal thing, ask questions, talk to them, and when there's an awkward silence or it starts dragging, talk about it. "I'm sorry, but I'm actually a pretty shy person and these roommate interviews are an exhausting process and awkward as hell, yeah?" They're also doing something they don't normally do. This is a weird thing. Address it. Be vulnerable. People connect on commonalities and your current commonality is the awkwardness of this process. Or, they hate it, don'…
/r/seduction20/11/18 04:04 PM
12

There is so much toxicity in this post and the ideas around it... 1) There are more than one type of woman. "Are there still any good women around these days?" implies that you're not in a place where you are meeting a variety of people and forming an opinion based on a narrow sample set. 2) "It seems like almost every woman on Instagram is calling herself an "Instagram model" who seemingly travels the world, asking random men to take modeling photos of them...even though they aren't models." — …
/r/seduction14/11/18 02:18 PM
4

Young women are immature. Most men just happen to be attracted to young women.
/r/seduction30/10/18 03:54 PM
8

Physical safety. Women are also concerned about their physical safety.
/r/seduction21/10/18 09:22 PM
6

No — adding someone on FB opens up more ways of peering into your life than meeting in person. I don't need a new date to look at photos of me from college or to see what some relative posted publicly. In person, I only reveal what I physically convey and what I say. It's safer.
/r/seduction21/10/18 09:21 PM
10

There are quite a few dating profiles (tinder, bumble, etc) that request this. For some women, it's easier to have an instagram or snapchat open than a tinder or bumble. In NYC, for example, people are looking over each others' shoulders all the time on the subway and women feel safer chatting on IG than to let the guy sitting next to her know that she's single and seeking dates. Not to say all women welcome this behavior — but there are definitely some that prefer it.
/r/seduction19/10/18 03:23 PM
13

I see you’re trying to give advice and I believe you mean well. In the future, you when someone is telling you about a negative emotion they are feeling, telling them how they should feel is never really helpful. While you may have valid advice, it is typically not the context in which the advice will be helpful.
/r/seduction08/10/18 12:32 PM
2

Yeah it's easy when you try.
/r/seduction07/10/18 05:31 PM
36

The point of all of this is to find people that are into you.
/r/seduction07/10/18 05:30 PM
3

All four panels show men. In seduction and pickup, I care more about what the women think.
/r/seduction07/10/18 02:41 PM
0

I'd argue we all have a "need for attention" — that is what dating is about, right? Getting attention from another person?
/r/seduction23/09/18 03:41 PM
9

It’s interesting because I know a number of women who don’t want to give a number because that allows more ways of getting back to them if it’s a creep. They keep it to the platform for safety.
/r/seduction12/09/18 02:48 AM
4

ARE YOU GUILTY OF THIS? ARE YOU A BAD PERSON FOR PERFORMING YOUR CHANGE INCORRECTLY? Shame is no way to elicit change. Changing behavior due to shame is toxic and causes side effects that will come up in a negative fashion later on in life. Your teachings might be good, but the approach will help others fail.
/r/seduction11/09/18 05:36 PM
1

How else does this anxiety manifest? Does it affect your work life? Do you ruminate on it in your alone time? Do you find yourself perusing avoidant behaviors like drinking, smoking, video games, or porn to alleviate the anxiety?
/r/seduction11/09/18 04:10 PM
2

Yes, you are correct. Walking into a bar, approaching the most attractive person in the room, and crying to them would be a turn-off. ​ The conversation, as I understand through the series of comments and replies, is about faking-it-till-you-make-it vs. being vulnerable. There is a lot of gray area between the two extremes and I think that extremes on either side would not "work." Using a similar logic, the faker would smile forever, never showing a sad or upset emotion. They would be plastic. U…
/r/seduction10/09/18 08:32 PM
1

We’ve been ring shopping the last few weeks.
/r/seduction08/09/18 08:56 PM
1

What attracted her the most on the first date was my ability to be vulnerable and tell her the truth.
/r/seduction08/09/18 08:55 PM
2

She was a random girl I just met when we started.
/r/seduction08/09/18 07:04 AM
–

That’s not what’s happened in my life. My gf of four+ years likes it when I display my emotions and tell her what I’m actually thinking. It feels much less toxic.
/r/seduction08/09/18 04:03 AM
4

It’s so tough to find a good therapist, it’s almost as hard as finding a relationship. It sounds like you’re either using the approval of others as a proxy for soothing your self esteem and/or you are attempting to make up for a seeming lack of control in earlier/current parts of your life. I’m obviously projecting. Keep working on yourself. Knowing is half the battle.
/r/seduction07/09/18 02:40 AM
19

Would you say you grew up in an environment where you felt you weren't in control? Like you lacked agency or power?
/r/seduction06/09/18 08:37 PM
1

Have you tried therapy?
/r/seduction06/09/18 08:35 PM
8

Therapy. Your school probably provides it for free. Do it. If you don’t like the first person, try another. Do it. In the short term, it will help you be more self confident. In the long run, it will help you speak with vulnerability. I’m in my 30s and, to this day, therapy was one of the most important things I did on a college campus.
/r/seduction01/09/18 02:39 PM
5

PragerU (short for Prager University) is an American non-profit organization that creates videos on various political, economic, and philosophical topics from a conservative perspective. The videos are posted on YouTube and usually feature a speaker who gives a mini-lecture for about five minutes.[1] Despite having "University" in its name, PragerU is not an academic institution, does not hold classes, and does not grant certifications or diplomas. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/PragerU It call…
/r/seduction06/08/18 04:04 PM
1

What I’m asking is: what have you done to raise your stats besides reading about pickup? Did you also make yourself more attractive in those 14 months?
/r/seduction09/07/18 03:51 AM
1

How much have you worked on yourself? Do you exercise more? Fix your posture? Working on making more money? Therapy for your self-esteem?
/r/seduction08/07/18 10:45 PM
4

So is it about finding someone to be with or power over someone else? What are you actually chasing after?
/r/seduction08/07/18 10:42 PM
1

Why do you need for her to make the decision? Why can't you have a conversation or make a suggestion? I hear there are apps that can help you do both.
/r/seduction15/06/18 06:55 PM
132

"A guess is when you don't know and, since you don't know, this is a great time to guess. So guess."
/r/seduction15/06/18 06:54 PM
3

That's an issue about excitement in the relationship and one dinner ain't solving for that.
/r/seduction15/06/18 06:53 PM
4

You slip the maitre'd $$$$ while confirming that you're early for your reservation.
/r/seduction15/06/18 06:53 PM
139

Ignore her desires and focus on your own!
/r/seduction15/06/18 06:51 PM
1

It doesn't seem like you did anything wrong — that night just wasn't meant to happen. You took care of your needs and went to sleep, nothing wrong with your actions there. Are you still interested in the girl? What's keeping you from a second date?
/r/seduction22/01/18 03:36 PM
1

Are you wondering how you should feel about the guy or your date? In the worst case scenario, they slept together and ate both lying to you about it. Why would they need to lie about it? Are you worried that another dude wanted to sleep with the person you were on a date with?
/r/seduction22/01/18 04:20 AM
1

You could think she didn’t want to drive home. Sounds like you don’t trust her — what has she done to warrant that?
/r/seduction21/01/18 04:58 PM
1

Sounds like the two of them went back to the club, yes? Sounds like she was too drunk to drive back to her place afterwards.
/r/seduction21/01/18 03:09 PM
1

Is it possible she wanted to show you that she was attracted but did not want to sleep with you that night?
/r/seduction21/01/18 02:57 PM
3

That's not true. Therapy. Your school probably offers it for free. See that last part you just mentioned? About people in your life just not focused on that right now — that could be you.
/r/seduction04/10/17 04:56 AM
20

Then either do something about your profile, your pictures, or your life.
/r/seduction15/09/15 11:39 AM
2

No. They're telling you they're lazy and neither "live life to the fullest" nor "take advantage of everything the city has to offer."
/r/seduction17/06/15 06:01 PM
3

What have you got to lose? It doesn't seem like you're talking to them. The worst you get is a "no" and then you're back where you started except +closure.
/r/seduction24/07/14 06:34 PM
62

STD testing is something that should be done as regularly as teeth cleanings -- every six months. Getting tested does not infer you might have STDs, it means you're sexually active and responsible about it.
/r/seduction24/07/14 06:29 PM
9

Well, it's hard to do that half way through the semester. I still strike up a lot of conversations with a lot of people, but everyone tends to be very guarded about their vices and that makes it a little hard to find out who I have stuff in common with, not to mention most people have already formed their cliques. At no point in life do people determine, "I think we all know enough cool people. Let's close this group off for a while." Cliques are not frats or sororities - there is no defined sig…
/r/seduction13/10/13 11:58 AM
1

Yeah, I'm with everyone else here about making yourself a better person, losing the competition mindset, escalating sooner, etc. The use of the word "make" made me cringe. Free will and whatnot.
/r/seduction13/08/13 11:38 AM
0

Send me a message if you're in NYC.
/r/seduction13/05/13 06:11 AM
1

Very possible. I'm currently sleeping with a girl that specifically hunts for asian men.
/r/seduction13/05/13 06:08 AM
3

Sounds great. How often do you take girls out?
/r/seduction30/09/12 01:26 AM
3

I've definitely made a point to sit next to (as opposed to across from) OKCupid first meets and this "leg trick" is part of the reason. It's a part of my kino escalation and it is a really good gauge of how the date is going.
/r/seduction12/03/12 05:55 AM
6

I have to disagree. I've made multiples orgasm with the alphabet. Also, how does it piss them off? Actually, how do they even know to be pissed? You don't have to say the letters out loud while you're down there. They don't have to know how many times you did the ABCs.
/r/seduction04/03/12 03:51 PM
3

I clicked. Got confused. Then, "Clever girl..."
/r/seduction01/03/12 07:40 PM
2

I'm surprised no one has posted this yet. you: "Well, it was nice to meet you." her: "Yeah, you're fun to talk to. If only there was a way to continue this sometime..." pause her: "I can give you my number" – or some other suggestion on how to stay in touch Yes, it may allow for her to gracefully bow out of the situation. That's okay. Like all the other posts here say, you'll get over it and move on because you're alpha, right? Give her the opportunity to suggest giving you her number.
/r/seduction29/01/12 01:56 AM
0

It's funny because my friends think I'm nuts. I do alright for myself now, but if I had opened up to asian girls, I'd be swimming in it. I would have been swimming in it all throughout college, instead of the years of draught I experienced.
/r/seduction20/01/12 03:31 AM
2

I don't have the source, but I read that, according to 2000 US Census data, the ratio of blackman&whitewoman to whiteman&blackwoman relationships was almost the same as the ration of whiteman&asianwoman to asianman&whitewoman relationships. This article also claimed the data was getting tougher for the asian man in that the ratio was shifting. I once dated a girl who told me someone called her a rice-chaser because of her series of asian guys. I thought it was hilarious. Do you live near NYC?
/r/seduction20/01/12 03:28 AM
6

Asian guy here. I'm not physically attracted to asian girls. I've only dated white girls. The closest was sleeping with a half-asian girl in college.
/r/seduction19/01/12 06:51 PM
1

Me too. NYC -> San Diego. Good luck to you.
/r/seduction06/01/12 02:27 PM
1

I freelance, so I'm always job searching. It would be nice if I could find a more permanent home, but I don't like doing sales and that's what my industry (meeting, event, and conference management) has open right now. It depends on your industry. I do know one thing. It is much easier to get an interview when the address on your resume has a New York zip code on it.
/r/seduction30/12/11 12:02 AM
1

Big dense populations. If there are enough people, you don't run the risk of having to see the same people over and over again if you don't want to. It also frees up your fear of failure (assuming that's an issue) because, more than likely, you won't see this person ever again. Density for transportation sake. You don't want to have to rule someone out/be ruled out because it would take a trip to see someone. Casual meetups are so much easier. For these reasons and more, I moved to New York.
/r/seduction29/12/11 05:09 PM
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