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malpaiss Archive

View 3 posts and 196 comments by malpaiss on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

I completely agree, I would consider myself to be a feminist but also very in touch with my feminine roles in my personal family dynamic (not a trad wife in this economy but I know where my strengths are at home). As a feminist I support all women and men in playing to their strengths.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:46 PM
–

The hard data shows that 50% of adults in the UK or US are married. Others are dating, divorced, widowed. Sorry bud but it really isn't true that the majority of men are incels.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:43 AM
11

Seconding everything you've said - I'm also a mum of 2 and I'm delighted for them to be my life's purpose, the effects on my body or career are not factors I would ever care about compared to the incredible satisfaction I get from parenting. But I would never ever suggest that anyone who doesn't really WANT this life should be encouraged or forced into it. It is all consuming and it can be so hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 06:36 PM
3

I don't think OPs point applies only to dating. I find it very confusing to hear that there is a whole epidemic of men unable to date when I know so so many totally average, or below average guys who are married with families. Fat guys, short guys, poor guys, just living their lives without any of the problems PPD guys talk about. It really does seem like the people complaining here just don't get out and see for themselves that these issues simply aren't as widespread as they'd like to believe
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 07:14 PM
–

The dishwasher comment absolutely sent me. You're completely right. A woman who feels looked after will look after her man.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 10:25 AM
-8

And when was there last a conscription in the US? Men choose to sign up.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:02 AM
2

Ok but generally the decluttering and organising needs to happen at some point. When do you suggest that happens? If not on the weekend then when? When you aren't around to notice it happening or be involved in it? My husband is the typical guy who will just shove stuff in random drawers and cupboards until nothing can be found and frankly it becomes a hazard. That means these spaces need reorganising occasionally. Luckily he does seem to understand the consequences of these actions and doesn't …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 09:24 PM
20

This is not a normal way to live. Decent men are everywhere - married and in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 09:39 PM
6

What a load of crap. My husband didn't kneel when he proposed. I didn't care at all whether he did or didn't. We had traditional Christian marriage vows, where I vowed to obey my husband and in return he vowed to adore me. It's incredibly clear that women are the subservient ones in the eyes of tradition. Women don't propose because men famously need to feel they have the final day on any relationship decisions otherwise will spend the rest of their lives blaming women for things they consented …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 06:35 PM
0

... Wow
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 08:09 PM
9

Mate if you don't know what housework is, you are the problem
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 02:03 PM
8

Women's bodies are a kind of status symbol. Men certainly treat them that way - see: trophy wives. Going out and showing off your body is a bit like going out in your freshly detailed car that you worked hard for. Sure it's a bonus if the opposite sex thinks it looks good. Tbh it's an even bigger bonus if the same sex thinks it looks good! What could be better than getting the approval of your peers and fitting in. Some people might do it for competitive reasons: "my car is better than yours". O…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 06:24 PM
3

Does it help you to know that I came into the marriage with significant savings and investments and he came into it with a huge business debt from COVID? Or that my inheritance is likely to be 10x what his will be?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 01:13 PM
6

No not at all. It was very much his idea. I am younger than he is, all his friends were already married when we met. I am very lucky because it really did/does feel romantic to have a man who readily and enthusiastically wants to share his life and all that comes with it, with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 02:08 PM
18

Romance! An eternal commitment which goes beyond looks and circumstances, it's a lovely and charming idea. It also provides a secure basis for having kids - who wants to be the woman who "baby traps" a man who wasn't willing to publicly prove his commitment to her in advance. I didn't get married because I wanted to benefit from any future financial luck that might befall my husband, and I'm pretty certain he didn't marry me because I am clearly far more talented at picking up dirty socks than h…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 01:09 PM
10

What I mean to say is there has been no negative impact on his employment. Personally I wouldn't have the option to start my own business because it would cost me my maternity rights. I can't even move to another employer. That's an unequal load. He earns substantially more doing what he does now despite the flexibility. There's nothing to say he wouldn't have taken this route even if we didn't have kids. My point re: OP is that women do still work for the most part, but their earnings and poten…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 12:42 PM
8

He definitely doesn't have old fashioned views. He left his job to start up his own business for more flexible working when we started a family. Our country has no paternity rights for the self employed. That's a sexist system but not his fault. The system is unequal, biology is unequal, but that doesn't mean that we can't recognise the effort and sacrifices made by BOTH genders. Which is what the OP is about.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 12:25 PM
2

It is totally this archaic view that only men and their labour have value. The funny thing is that I know lots of men who enjoy their jobs, and get satisfaction from doing it well, just as much as I know women (not SAHMs - I don't know any of those, this is the 21st century after all) who love looking after their families and get satisfaction from that. Which is a perfectly fine dynamic providing there is equal respect and appreciation for the roles everyone plays. The OP is absolutely correct t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 12:01 PM
1

It doesn't take me 40 minutes a day, but it sounds like it might take you that long. You should try pairing up a toddlers socks one day, and time that. The point is that housework for an entire household is cumulative, the time adds up, you can't compare the load of a single adult with that of a family (with a partner who is blind to where they leave their dirty socks, and children who distribute breakfast cereal around the house)
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:41 AM
3

Why would you be seen as an equal parent if she's doing 100% of the childcare?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:34 AM
1

That's great. You can assume that doing laundry for a family of 4 would take you 40 minutes then. Which is not insignificant on a regular basis.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:33 AM
1

I don't know dude, is it obsessive to wear clean underpants or eat from a clean plate? I guess that's pretty subjective.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:22 AM
17

It doesn't have to be a single income family. I can't take any risks with my career because I need to keep my maternity benefits in order to grow a family. Over the course of two pregnancies and maternity leaves I will have missed 4 years of opportunities. And then rightly or wrongly I will be seen as a less committed employee for the rest of my career (or until my children are adults by which time I will be aged out of many progression opportunities) Parenthood doesn't affect my husband's emplo…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:20 AM
4

Preach!! I renovated my whole apartment by myself and fitted a whole kitchen when I was single. My home was a pristine sanctuary. And sometimes it still is when my husband goes away for work 😂
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:14 AM
4

The vast majority of women do work. And also contribute a disproportionately high amount of the household labour. All of the studies reflect this (and also show that men overestimate their contributions to housework).
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:11 AM
2

How often does your fridge need moving?! If you think your wife needs to do physical labour just because of the career path you chose then shouldn't she also have equal access to funds? It sounds like you would enjoy a high earning corporate wife so you could be a house husband and live out your dreams of outsourcing male-coded labour.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:10 AM
2

Yeah so I don't know about yours, but my machine doesn't collect the dirty clothes from the basket, move them across to the dryer or hang them outside, or fold and redistribute them back to their respective rooms and drawers. I would love to know the model of your machine if it does. You sound very ignorant about how much time and effort it takes to run a household.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:06 AM
3

So do you agree that men who are the sole earners should have no access to their children after a divorce?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:01 AM
6

Lord knows my husband hates to see me coming swinging a hammer to fix the thing he hasn't fixed in the last 6 months 😂 I might not do it the way he likes but that's the risk you take when you sit on your tasks
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:00 AM
4

Yes of course a man would argue that lifting a box occasionally and mowing the lawn is an approximately fair comparison to doing all of the cooking, cleaning, laundry, and administration of a household. Sure you'd have to cook for yourself living alone, but you wouldn't have to keep track of multiple people's needs and likes. My husband couldn't tell you which days our child needs lunch and what we have in stock for them. It takes planning. It would be really interesting to compare the physical …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 10:59 AM
3

Many couples agree that it is in their children's best interests to have a present parent rather than both parents competing to have the highest powered career and the children to be raised by staff. If you don't see your partner as an EQUAL partner, don't get married.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 10:54 AM
9

You have to think of starting a marriage almost like starting a business. You CAREFULLY choose your business partner, and become 50:50 shareholders in the business of building a life together. Anyone sensible would choose a life/business partner with a skillset which complements theirs, not mirrors it. So you recognise that both parties contribute in different ways. You recognise that even if one isn't pulling their weight (which could either be financially, or domestically), they are still a 50…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 10:51 AM
10

This argument doesn't disprove the sexism of the situation. The whole point is that there is a gendered division of labour. The difference is that the tasks you described need doing maybe once a month at maximum? Whereas the daily running of a household is a constant, and thankless thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 10:44 AM
3

I very deliberately healed myself before meeting my husband. My relationships before him were not good. I wanted to be the partner that my future husband deserved (and obviously feel good in myself). So I guess he is the prize! I was the best possible version of myself at that time. I lived alone and my whole life was about being whole and content. I did therapy, I meditated, I read all sorts of books, I exercised and spent time in nature, I volunteered and I did classes and I was at my peak fit…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/25 04:34 AM
–

Oh maybe his PR team are paying to push the posts then, and it's not because they're profiling me to be among the older ladies who comment about how he's just made them ovulate for the first time in 20 years haha
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 08:23 PM
–

Confident men are comfortable and respectful communicating with anyone. Whether that's another man who is professionally senior OR junior to them or an old lady or a child. Not just about how they communicate with women they find attractive. They generally will have some expertise in some area but be curious enough to concede to other people in areas they don't have expertise in. A know-it-all never comes across as confident to me - a confident person accepts their weaknesses and most likely wil…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 06:25 PM
1

Health is attractive and health is socially subjective. Today's standards aren't exempt. Kim Kardashian in her curvy heyday would have been borderline obese compared to great beauties of the past, but her ever-changing figure has set the body fashion trends of the last decade. At the moment there is a focus on toned female bodies as that is a wealth/free time indicator as well as a health one. Pre-Raphaelite beauty standards were also an indicator of health, weath and leisure but they were soft …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 10:05 PM
1

I think your take here is actually a bit naive about how susceptible men can also be to fashion trends. Look at the beautiful movie stars of the 40s and 50s. They were waif thin with narrow hips and small breasts. Look at Elizabethan makeup styles with their undefined, small looking eyes, fake beauty spots and lips made deliberately smaller. These looks appealed to the men at the time. It's fine to like what you like, but it isn't happening in a vacuum. It's not simple biology, fashion is at pla…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 09:50 PM
2

I think that the majority of people who say they don't care what other people think of them are liars. We are social animals and we choose what peers we want to appeal to. I'm not saying all women dress for the attention of men. I'm saying in response to OP that men DO like that look and if you see a woman pursuing it, the deepest motivation will be because men like it and it makes her sexually competitive.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 09:14 PM
1

Can you reword this please as I'm not sure what you mean
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 09:01 PM
2

Yeah absolutely they do make the claim. It's not a black and white issue. You have a girl growing up in the age of abundant facial fillers and filtered photos. She sees her male peers lusting over these features and her female peers coveting them. She internalises the beauty standard and becomes insecure about her small lips/big nose/short eyelashes. She indulges in treatments that "correct" her appearance. She looks in the mirror and feels better. Men and women compliment her and she becomes th…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 08:55 PM
3

Men are 50% of the population. Around 85%+ women are attracted to men in some way. It would be ridiculous to think that women never consider men's opinions on how they look. And men are very vocal about what they like to look at. It isn't something the average woman is going to achieve without makeup at the absolute minimum.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 08:40 PM
7

You guys are so full of shit. Show me a beautiful woman on Instagram with lots of adoring male followers who wears no makeup, has not enhanced her look with procedures, and don't forget ISNT using filters. I don't believe for a second that any woman seeks this appearance only for herself or for the approval of other women - because millions of men are extremely vocal about their love of an enhanced look every single day.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 08:12 PM
1

I consider myself a pretty big feminist and I took my husband's last name. I was raised by my mother but had my father's last name, which I never felt any deep affinity with. So I already felt I had a man's last name, it cost me nothing emotionally to swap it for the name of a man I had chosen for myself. I haven't changed my name professionally, because I've been at my job for a really long time. When I get a new job I will probably use my married name. It's not really a big deal to me. If I'd …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 09:13 PM
8

Most women work. Both halves provide finances.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/25 05:52 AM
4

The mother essentially just feeds the baby in utero, after conception. The father can feed the baby after birth. Hell, the father could carry the baby everywhere and exclusively feed it for the first 9 months. Wouldnt that be fair and even? Your logic doesn't hold up. As an aside, my husband and I are both very tall but our daughter has been below 20th percentile for height since even before she was born. Genetics are unpredictable.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 06:16 AM
8

These posts about DNA tests really seem to miss the actual reality of how babies are made. If this is a casual relationship or one night stand then sure, have your doubts, take your test. But if you're in a committed relationship or marriage how the hell is this meant to work - women are only fertile for a few days each month. If you know your wife, you're going to have a good idea of when those days are (and so is she). If you don't know, figure it out, it's not hard. Did you have sex during th…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 07:58 AM
6

Seriously! In OP's example he's approaching someone to tell them they look cute but is offended that they dont automatically also find him cute? When you cold approach someone it's always 100% based on looks alone. How can it possibly be unfair for the approached person to also judge on looks alone..
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 12:35 PM
5

Hahahaha no. Absolutely not. I know you would like this to be the case but it simply is not.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 07:10 AM
19

Im sorry but this is nonsense. When I was young and free I was heavily involved with alternative communities and squatters and believe me, all the homeless, hippy or punk, dishevelled and unwashed, unemployed and uneducated male or female, were ALL having sex and relationships. Often in rotation with each other, swapping and sharing partners the same way they shared the food they dug out of restaurant dumpsters each night. My dude just go and live your life, have some experiences, you will see t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 01:17 PM
11

Is it possible that you only value the sacrifices that men make and you feel contempt towards the kind of sacrifices that women do? Do you respect and admire women? Your responses dont show that you do.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 12:56 PM
9

Have a look at historic maternal mortality rates. Countless women have put their lives on the line for their man, their legacy and their family.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/25 12:51 PM
–

We are talking about n count here. Not just approaches. And on your water analogy - if someone lived by a river would they be called disgusting for drinking from it?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 08:24 AM
3

The weird analogies dont really help here. I do understand your point of view. But surely you also see that these are individual interpersonal interactions and not a scoreboard?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 07:52 AM
5

Its weird when men frame sexual encounters as achievements. Or the number of encounters. As a woman that does not cross my mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 07:04 AM
2

What does anything you've said have to do with my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/25 01:41 PM
9

So if there was a lineup of women, all average except for a stunning porn star, men would just choose one at random and not go for the one with the porn-look?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 10:17 AM
20

Men don't want to date those women lol. I read this a lot on PPD and it genuinely puzzles me. Men may not want to date porn actresses but they certainly do want to fuck them. Is this the equivalent to a alpha fucks beta bucks situation? Because that's how it feels. Women don't want to marry bad boy criminal chad either, even if she finds him arousing. Aren't average, un-surgically enhanced women just being settled for?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 08:31 AM
8

Yep, as a natural introvert it was no trouble at all for me to spend more time at home and relieve the pressure to socialise several times a week. I actually think it did more harm to my male friends / friends husbands because they had always relied on the women to make plans for them and they weren't as used to staying in touch online like the girls were.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 07:38 AM
2

I have a good friend who does this. He's a really smart guy. I feel like he's invested too much energy into the red pill and pickup artist mindset though, and it's cost him energy he could have invested in other parts of his life. I dont believe he could ever be satisfied by a standard relationship now, even though I know he hopes one of these transactional ones will turn into genuine romance one day. It can be hard to see someone you care about being stuck in this loop, he will always see the p…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 10:00 PM
6

I dont believe that the majority of young women want to "play the field". Especially not any more than young men want to. I believe they want to gain relationship experience and work towards finding suitable partners, in general. Which sometimes means regrettably "kissing frogs" along the journey of that search. I do agree though that it is wise to marry someone who has settled into themselves and knows their life direction, whether male or female. In my experience people tend to stagnate more a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:55 PM
-1

You're being reductive and choosing to ignore a huge amount of nuance. The sample size of single father households is vastly smaller and likely to be significantly less diverse than single mothers. Rightly or wrongly, women tend to be the primary parent. For the father to become the primary parent he is likely to be unusually engaged, stable and nurturing. Whereas single moms become single moms often due to circumstances other than their personal characteristics. They are the default option, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 11:46 PM
10

These are the parameters that you alone have set. That doesn't make them reasonable and it doesn't give you a moral high ground. I can repeat myself too: trust goes both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 09:59 PM
9

Neither would a polygraph or device access. But it's the best indicator a couple can offer each other if they choose to stay in a relationship without trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 09:52 PM
12

How else do you provide an equivalent amount of reassurance that the man hasn't cheated?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 09:48 PM
17

I understand that having a baby with a woman is a leap of faith. It is for the woman as well. I trusted my husband not to leave or cheat when I was the size of a whale and in constant pain from being pregnant with his child. I trusted him to look after and advocate for me in my most vulnerable medical moment of my life. I trusted him to be faithful when we were in the trenches of newborn life while my body did super weird things, often very gross, and hormones and sleep deprivation threatened my…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 09:35 PM
7

Off topic but this post doesn't resonate with me at all regarding dating or interpersonal interactions - but it does sound like a pretty accurate summary of the Trump/Ukraine saga. The "US doesn't owe the rest of the world anything" narrative. I dont think you can force people to be generous with their bodies or affection, but empathy and generosity with those experiencing hard times should be a human standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/25 11:22 AM
3

There's asking - eg "is this ok?" "Are you comfortable with this?" and then there's asking someone to sign a formal and irrevocable contract agreeing that you consent to anything they do next. These are not at all similar
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 07:17 PM
11

I dont agree with the idea that men should date single moms (or anyone else they dont want to date) but I can understand where other women are coming from if this is something they feel defensive about. Women tend to be the primary parent after a split/divorce/accidental pregnancy. Far more single parents are women. There are lots of situations which could lead to them becoming single parents which aren't actually their fault- maybe their husband cheats, or dies, or they break up amicably for no…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 07:02 PM
11

I am in some of these Facebook groups and there are also plenty of men posted (the majority actually) who no one has anything bad to say about. Also it's not like these bad guys are being advertised like "hey this abusive drug dealing cheat is a great catch, you girls should all give him a chance!" - women are warning other women after being lied to and duped, to try and save each other from the same experiences. Obviously, serial cheats are going to have a higher volume of negative feedback sim…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 10:49 PM
59

I wouldnt trust a man who asked me to sign a document signifying that he doesn't trust me. Success of sex relies on mutual trust and respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 11:52 PM
112

I would have no choice but to assume he is trying to cover his tracks in advance of doing something terrible to me. It would be an enormous red flag. I understand you are thinking about men protecting themselves but peculiar behaviour like this is not going to inspire a woman to put themselves in a vulnerable position.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 11:36 PM
6

I answered the question the OP asked. Also note that I said "attempted" to cheat - I don't believe they were actually successful but being less attractive than other men I've dated certainly didn't stop them doing their best to step out on our relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 10:34 PM
17

The more conventially attractive looking guys I've dated have been more mentally stable and made better partners. In my experience men with insecurities were more susceptible to undesirable behaviours such as addictions and attempting to cheat.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 12:20 PM
7

Where are "all the complaints about being used for sex"? This isn't part of my experience as a woman and I only hear about it here on PPD, from men.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/25 12:17 PM
–

I find all these "passport bro" fantasies so strange because it really doesn't play out the way they think in my experience. I have male friends like your cousin who have married foreign women but they don't WANT to leave their lives and families in developing countries. These men are now happily settled with children in the countries that passport bros assume everyone wants to escape. Also when I visited one of these friends in SE Asia I saw western men being openly exploited all over the place…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/25 10:13 AM
6

Yep, my husband, who studied engineering, forgets how gravity works when it comes to dishwashers. We've even sat down and watched videos about how they work. Things still come out dirty when he loads it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/25 03:35 PM
76

So you're saying that women go to women's only spaces (like twoxchromosones) to lie that they dont enjoy experiencing sexual violence? And you're also saying they are doing this to gaslight men?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 03:45 AM
–

Ok so you believe no one is special to anyone else. That is your POV. It is contradictory with how many people choose to get married though.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 11:51 AM
–

Either people can be special, or they can't. As a woman who could have thousands of matches for hook ups on a dating app within an hour, choosing someone to date and actually hook up with because you get along with them really well and seem to be compatible surely does make them special. At some point you need to accept that what is special is someone choosing to pursue or commit to you. Not this arbitrary "what if" someone else is the same or better than you.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 10:48 AM
8

I think it's best for a couple le to do a cursory check with each other that their relationship histories are fairly aligned, regardless of what that looks like. That ensures that they can have mutual understanding and respect for each other's experiences. Even a high N count couple can appreciate that they have chosen each other from all the available options they had previously. The most successful relationships I know are between couples with similar n counts and dating timelines.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 10:36 AM
–

If you have standards for 1 man you should have standards for every men I have a problem with this assumption. If a woman makes you wait you assume she's giving it up quicker to others (AFBB) and if she doesn't make you wait you assume she's easy for all. I've seen this play out when I slept with a man I really liked early on, unusual for me and I wasn't seeing anyone else, but his self esteem couldn't handle it. He became obsessively paranoid about who else I could be sleeping with if it was po…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 10:21 AM
1

That really isn't true. I'm not talking about erectile dysfunction, I'm saying that many men cant perform with a real woman. Check out r/pornfree and listen to some actual men on the subject because it's clear that you will imagine any strange scenario about what women are looking at on social media (mens jobs? Really?) To deflect any criticism from your precious porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 06:38 AM
3

Whst a load of rubbish. Women are real people, they have jobs, pay for things, know what they cost. I dont know anyone who has broken up because they can't afford to go on luxury trips?! Porn overconsumption does cause sexual dysfunction however which absolutely does destroyed relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 02:21 AM
3

Because of my inability to morph body shape/race/taboo every 3 seconds?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/25 01:40 PM
2

No my dude, a cursory google shows these to be empirical facts. More porn use by men = higher instances of erectile dysfunction. More erotica use by women = increased libido. Anecdotally, roughly a third of the men I've been with have suffered with porn-induced dysfunction. Which has negatively affected relationships which obviously were not successful in the long run. I married a man who is apathetic towards porn and has a healthy attitude towards it and sex. He certainly wouldn't be frothing w…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/25 01:38 PM
2

I did have a little look at your profile and yeah i can see you're a woman who likes looking at men haha. Im going to be lazy and not check this but i would guess that in terms of social media follows, there are likely far more men following attractive female celebs/influencers than women following men. Of course we're all different but this sub deals in generalisations. I also suspect that the number of men whose sexual performance is affected by their porn use is higher than any quantity of wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 10:22 PM
7

Yes there are lots of ways to access dopamine hits through the Internet. Few of them affect romantic and sexual relationships and function the way porn does.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 10:02 PM
7

I feel qualified to respond to this as a working mother. I love my kid more than life itself. My days working a corporate job are 100% easier than my days solo parenting and running a house at the same time. My kid is a clinger. If they aren't touching me odds are they are screaming. Best believe no one does that in the office. No one in the office needs watching like a hawk to make sure they dont do something life-endingly dumb. People respect me at work. I'm not sure a 1 year old child can gra…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 09:53 PM
5

I absolutely assure you that the average woman is not using social media to look at, or be messaged by, hyper attractive men. That just isn't reality. Men are exposed to far more unrealistic standards via porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 09:19 PM
8

Im not saying that any other part of 21st century life is natural. I was referencing the argument I see often that 'porn IS natural'. But on your point, the west absolutely does have an obesity epidemic which cant really be denied. I would hazard a guess that porn has also played a part in a sexual dysfunction epidemic that people aren't ready to talk about yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 09:17 PM
21

It's well established that porn affects the way that brains develop and work. It feels unhealthy to train your sexual response to react to such regular dopamine hits and variety. There is nothing natural about having the ability to watch thousands of women having sex at just the click of a button. Not to defend erotica because I'm in no way attached to it the way that many men are to porn, but it doesn't actually feature any human beings- it's just words. The descriptors of people aren't even al…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/25 08:51 PM
8

Absolutely no I would not. No matter how attracted I was or how well I got along with a man I wouldn't ever choose to meet in person if that was stated on their profile, it's a huge red flag. Sex happens because of chemistry and you can't gauge that before you meet face to face. I have had sex on first dates in the past, I have also declined to have sex on other dates which were explicitly intended to be casual hook ups (due to lack of in-person chemistry, which led to some quite scary experienc…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/25 09:47 AM
1

How do you know that the fact you has to care for your family the reason why your position have not been culled yet? Are you able to rephrase this? It does not make any sense. It is a literal fact that i am paid less to work fewer hours. When I am able to increase my hours my renumeration will also increase. It is a very simple concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 10:26 PM
1

Im not talking about assumptions, I'm talking about facts. Here in the UK there is no notion of "parental rights". To elaborate: Children have rights (to be appropriately cared for) and parents have responsibilities. An unmarried man cannot be given legal "parental responsibility" without being named on the birth certificate, which he must be present to sign in person. If he refuses to attend or sign the birth certificate he is not assigned parental responsibility. He can choose to be later adde…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 10:04 PM
3

I think that anyone who qualifies for child support exceeding $180,000 is in a very good position to advocate for their own circumstances and I highly doubt this scenario is relevant to a single person who visits this sub. Don't worry too much about them, I guarantee they aren't worrying about you...
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 09:39 PM
1

Nothing in my comment suggested that women are more capable or better suited. I said that they usually are the primary caregivers, which is completely true. Whether this is biological or societal it makes no difference. The vast majority of mothers in heterosexual parenting relationships do more than half of the childcare and related tasks. That is an indisputable fact. I would suggest that men are encouraged to take 50% of the parenting responsibilities in a happy marriage to strengthen their c…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 09:13 PM
2

Of course earning potential is a thing. I am a mother who receives 80% of my full wage because I provide childcare for my family 1/5 working days, because there are no other options where we live. My full earning potential would be 100% and working 5/5 days. I earn more than my husband even on my reduced salary but my work is flexible and his isn't. I am missing out on earning more money which could be saved for the future, as well as 20% of development opportunities and arguably 20% of my credi…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 07:57 PM
0

What about rent/groceries/utilities/fuel/transport? Of course these costs will be considerably higher if you are providing the majority of the care for a child. You do surely understand that if a father contributes to the necessities for raising a child it would make more of the mothers own hard earned funds available for her to spend as she pleases?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 07:15 PM
5

Please refer to the OP - this question is about instances where children were planned and wanted.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 02:04 PM
9

Do you believe that the men in these cases take full 50% responsibility for their children prior to divorce - ie taking time off work when the child is sick, appointments, paperwork, involvement with school life, housework?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 12:35 PM
18

I agree with this. I have met more men than I can count who blame women for their lack of a relationship with their children and yet have never even applied to court for access which costs just £200 ($240) and would certainly establish contact in the vast majority of cases. There is no need for legal representation in the UK system. I do suspect men who are equal parents in terms of effort and sacrifice prior to divorce are more successful in 50/50 arrangements after the fact, and perhaps those …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 12:18 PM
17

You can't make someone parent when they don't want to - what about parents who only want part time custody ie 1-2 days per week or every other weekend due to their own schedules or prioritising their work?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:58 AM
11

This is an interesting premise but what about where parents disagree on quality of food/clothing needed? Or if one parent chooses to use paid childcare on their days to enable them to work more - would that be a shared cost? Is there any consideration for financial / career sacrifices made before the relationship breakdown?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:40 AM
9

Well women are usually the primary caregivers which is why they tend to be the default parent. Is that fair? Maybe not. Is it the fault of women? Definitely not. No woman can make a man be a 50/50 parent against his will. From what I see in UK parenting spaces it is very common for a father to be granted more access to his children than he actually ends up wanting,and mothers are constantly told they legally need to make the children available on those days even if the father consistently cancel…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:35 AM
4

Everything you have said is true but there is no convincing these people. They truly believe that they are average, all average men are single, and that they deserve a woman they consider high value, otherwise they may as well treat all other women as disposable. As if they would even have the opportunity to.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 12:29 PM
19

I can only see this being reasonable in an instance where both halves of the couple sign a contract agreeing to the terms ahead of any potential pregnancy occurring. Otherwise what's to stop men using this as a reckless form of birth control? We know there are plenty of men with breeding fetishes - should they be allowed to simply walk away from as many pregnancies as they like? Abortions are physically and emotionally unpleasant as well as carrying social shame- how do we level that playing fie…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 07:41 AM
9

I'm not disagreeing with you about parenting. I am a mother and I absolutely do the majority of the childcare. I'm the one who has to ask my husband to cover watching the baby so I can use the bathroom, he's never bought her a single toy or item of clothing, taken the baby to the doctor or taken a day off work because theyre sick, I could go on. But I would NOT want to be a father. The bond of a mother is indescribable. I had an extra 9 months bonding and my baby will always be a part of me. Bir…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 09:02 PM
3

I am a married british woman. My husband might be better at paperwork than me, I wouldnt know, because I have never really seen him do any. I dont know if this is a uniquely british thing but I do 100% of our family's paperwork. Anything left to him, eg with his own cars, inevitably doesn't get done and results in fines etc. Which I then deal with. I filed our marriage paperwork. Our child's paperwork. Our dogs paperwork. I set up all our bills. I have no doubt whatsoever that if we ever got div…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 08:54 PM
–

It's insane enough to call women a minority without then claiming that 1/5 is a "minority of a minority". That's 10% of the adult population!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/24 07:26 PM
6

As well as having equal spare time I think roughly equal energy levels and equal respect for each other's contributions are really important.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/24 04:42 PM
2

As a woman also in London I concur that there is a significant and recent decline in my peers to use hormonal contraception or IUDs. It isn't that they aren't available, they're all free and easy to access, but in my experience many women are choosing their comfort over sexual freedoms.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/24 10:39 PM
11

To offer a different perspective on a "power" dynamic - the general attitude is that sex is something that men "take" and women "give". Men are the fuckers and women are the fucked. We are all aware of the orgasm gap, and especially with a new partner the man is far more likely to finish than the woman is. That's before we even get to the physiological differences that put women at an inherently higher risk of being hurt (not even necessarily deliberately). Condoms or female condoms protect both…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/24 10:36 PM
–

Have you ever been to a club?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/24 01:02 PM
5

Have you ever seen porn? Men claim they dont want surgically altered women but then... just look at the porn industry. How are women supposed to believe that isn't what men want despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/24 12:01 PM
15

Equally if a woman offered her partner a paternity test out of the blue he's more likely to think she has doubts over the paternity than that she's just being an empathetic team player!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/23 08:58 AM
54

Have you ever considered that women are also capable of using men for sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/23 04:00 PM
1

I agree I don't know anyone who struggles to find a relationship for any length of time. I do know a couple of (average or maybe below) guys who have dabbled with PUA stuff and seem to struggle maintaining their interest in one woman for very long but could have had long term relationships if they had wanted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/23 01:00 PM
0

Not a man - my life was exactly like yours at 27. I loved my life in my lovely little house, awesome adventures and friendship circle, my wellbeing routines and my travels. It all enabled me to find and attract the absolute love of my life, who has made everything even better. We have a better house, better trips abroad, more stability and savings, I was finally able to get a dog, pursue more hobbies, and my heart is so full every single day. My old life was amazing and I don't regret a second o…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 04:37 AM
2

I know a few people who have been successful sugar babies. They don't meet families, or provide any illusion that they are in a relationship to outsiders, they are just a flashy accessory to be seen with in restaurants and on vacation.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 07:21 PM
2

They can expect the illusion of exclusivity, they are paying for a performance
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 07:04 PM
12

This is true, women have always been a part of the workforce. The 50s housewife was a short lived American dream fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 06:54 PM
4

Good!! That's exactly what they deserve! If a woman isn't able to keep up her career and earnings to rival her husbands, including any professional qualifications she needs to remain relevant to the workforce, while birthing and raising his children, cooking his food and cleaning his house (why should a man sacrifice his success to hire help - a wife can always earn more if she wants childcare and housekeepers), an Olympic level gym routine to ensure she doesn't 'let herself go', and all the oth…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 03:30 PM
10

I agree completely, because employed women are notoriously always homeless until they get married.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 12:40 PM
15

Of course it's also very important that women have no resources or time to better their own situation either. If they earn less, and spend all evening cleaning up after a man, they can never take on classes or extra activities to increase their earning potential. Of course men think it is perfectly fair for her to perform the roles of housekeeper and nanny alongside her own employment, and if he happens to find himself a side piece who has the time and/or energy to fuck him, leading to a divorce…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/23 10:50 AM
37

Most men on PPD make it known that they have no relationship experience, so they can only speak to what they think they might want out of a relationship (sex, with a young girl, nothing more matters). The reality is that men in their 30s have interests, lives, friends and extended family that they care about. Even if they would rather fuck a 19 year old than someone their own age, that's not who most balanced adult men want to share a life with. They don't want to embarrass themselves at work, o…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/23 09:08 PM
2

I see topless men all the time in the summer. And male cyclists in lycra. I assume these are utilitarian fashion choices rather than them inviting men to sexualise them. Women are no different!
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/23 04:48 PM
13

I wear leggings because I am a sweaty bitch and they dry faster / prevent chafing. I do wear baggy t shirts though. I imagine it's cooler for a lot of women (maybe less sweaty ones) to swear skimpy tops too. Just so you know it's not always an attention thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/23 02:08 PM
6

That stat only refers to managing children's schedules. Not actual childcare, or housework. We also don't know how the remaining 46% is split between "even responsibility" and "father does more"
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/23 09:41 AM
–

Justin Baldoni 💕 an awesome role model of a man, husband, dad etc
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/23 05:31 PM
6

Nothing wrong with seeking out someone who isn't interested in clubbing or having life experiences without you. But by expressly forbidding it (and being hypocritical), showing that you do not and will never fully trust her, you will not be able to make a woman happy. Which will only make you more insecure about letting her out of your sight.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/23 10:01 AM
53

Try posting this in a sub which isn't PPD and full of jaded men who are desperate to call themselves average when their attitudes are extremely clearly less than
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/23 10:11 AM
7

This is really good advice!! Yes it's creepy to approach a random woman who maybe hadn't even noticed you exist, to ask her for a drink or for her number. But small, friendly but nonchalant interactions build trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/23 04:14 PM
8

This post shows that men think women 'cockblock' their friends because they are jealous or hostile. A man is far less likely to become violent at a random person he thinks is jealous, than a woman he has been trying to hit on rejecting him and damaging his ego.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/23 04:18 PM
3

I'm not sure you know what a communist is. Or possibly even what women are
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 06:14 PM
9

"women and children (communists)" is the funniest thing I have ever read on this sub, well done
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/23 08:17 AM
27

The OOP says that they BOTH wanted a traditional family where the wife stayed at home with the kids. This agreement always acknowledges that the wife's earning ability will be stunted and the husband, whose career and earning potential is supported, bears the financial weight of that decision. Additionally, pregnancy is an unpredictable and life changing process, no two pregnancies will be the same, and their vows were "in sickness and in health". At no point did OOP step into his wife's roles a…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/23 01:04 PM
10

Absolutely, even after drinking me and my friends are super tuned into each others body language. And random other girls around us as well. On several occasions we have "rescued" other girls who have ended up separated from their own friends with a man they don't know or want to be near (who have explicitly asked for help or pretended to know us). Drunk men can easily feel like a threat, even when they think they've just successfully pulled, women have no way of knowing if they will be dangerous…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/23 09:58 AM
7

Of course women are famously not at all jealous when it comes to romantic partners
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/23 10:24 AM
3

This is partially cultural. I'm British and it's basically polite to complain here. It's considered conceited to talk at any length about your own success. Any good news is tempered with some kind of self-deprecating joke or a complaint to balance it. All that aside, I would still say that the vast majority of my interactions are positive with happy people. I know about the troubles of the people closest to me (health/fertility/money/work/housing stability) but they are still overall happy in th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 10:51 PM
1

Nice try but have you read the first sentence of this study?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 10:37 PM
3

This just shows that just because people are single doesn't mean they are unhappy - this data shows it seems to be an active choice. Nothing about how women value visual attraction as much as men do when choosing a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 09:58 PM
0

Are you trying to say that average people don't marry each other...?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 09:52 PM
1

Source this "data"? Because otherwise yeah I'm obviously going to believe the reality I live in over your words
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 09:46 PM
3

That doesn't make any sense. No one is saying you shouldn't save. What I'm saying is don't waste your life in pursuit of "I'll be happy when..." just be happy now. I guarantee you have something to be happy about today.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 09:37 PM
3

Yes, man, of course you understand women's attraction better than I, a woman, could do. How ridiculous of me. You just can't imagine any experience different from your own. LOL
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 09:33 PM
0

There is a difference between being happy and being free from all struggles. You can't be happy 24/7 that's not how it works. But very, very few people are miserable 24/7 either. Most people will experience far more moments of happiness than misery in a day. I recommend spending some time in developing countries and seeing how people manage to smile and laugh every day under circumstances that western people could not even conceive of. We have so much to be happy about - embrace it!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 08:57 PM
6

YES. I am super happy sat in front of the fire in my (average, rented) house. Hanging out with the dogs. Watching the seasons change and my garden grow. Having the time to read my favourite book. NO one is saying you shouldn't strive for more, if that's what you want. But tomorrow isn't promised, so please make sure to enjoy today and what you have as well. I honestly think if you look around you without bias, you will see people being happy and enjoying their lives despite any numbers from test…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 08:41 PM
2

Does it make you feel good to think that average people don't truly find happiness in average things?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 07:56 PM
3

I'm genuinely sorry to hear how unhappy you sound. If you are open to advice from a woman in your age group, I'd say to not waste another second on a woman who isn't what YOU want. They can't give you anything which is worth missing an opportunity for. This is a bit wishy washy even for me, but think about the kind of woman who would make you happy. What qualities would she want in a partner? These should be qualities which also feel good to you. What can you do for yourself to better embody the…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 07:48 PM
5

Is this genuinely your experience? Because it isn't mine. The people I know who have children later are more financially stable (with two established careers to support a family) than those who had children younger and limited their opportunities.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 07:30 PM
6

I dunno man I'm a liberal woman rapidly approaching her 30s who is extatic every day with my average life and experiences. Society should always strive to improve but we shouldn't ignore that we have the highest quality of life and abundance of opportunities and freedoms here in the west that any average human has ever experienced in all of history.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 07:28 PM
5

In my experience people are delaying marriage and families until their 30s because they are busy genuinely enjoying their lives and having different financial priorities before that, either with a partner they hope to marry or open to finding one. Younger marriages in working classes indicate that they have less freedom to choose how they spend their 20s, not that there's something going wrong in classes with more disposable income.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 07:22 PM
10

Totally. But there are young people here, and breaking the negative echo chamber for a minute could benefit their mental health.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 07:14 PM
5

You're allowed to be happy. Of course people experience struggles and anxieties! But if falling short of perfection means falling short of happiness then you are cursing yourself. Enjoy your average life and the choices you make to better it my man, it's the only one you're getting.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 06:19 PM
7

Average women match up with, and marry, average men every single day. We all know women are "less visual" than men and are far less likely to say "yes I'd bang" to a lineup of average strangers. But the vetting that women do, to define their attraction, is what lays the basis of successful and lasting relationships. Women are attracted to average men with similar values, goals, senses of humour. You can't tell that from a lineup. Just because they won't say "yes" to a picture, doesn't mean that …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 06:15 PM
7

It was after reading a post about how marriage advantages women and not men that I started thinking about this. The kind of divorce settlements that some men worry about are not something that the average person experiences. The people I know who are married are all totally average with similar education and incomes. It just seems like an awful lot of worrying about scenarios which are very unlikely to happen to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 06:05 PM
6

I've never met a man in that age group who has zero options. They date and haven't found the right match. The figures for the next age group are dramatically different. Single does not equal unhappy.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 05:59 PM
13

Many men in this sub are adamant that there is a problem with society and it needs urgent action to be resolved. I'm saying this is dramatic and blown out of proportion and does not represent most people's experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 05:56 PM
18

100% men on here acting like they're Bill Gates being forced to marry women who have never worked a day in their lives. Every study shows men have better outcomes from marriage. But they're here acting like it's a huge burden having someone birth and raise their kids, run their family and homes AND contribute financially while they run off to 'save the world' in their incredibly important, yet average jobs...
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/23 03:36 PM
1

The baby is the incentive, as it is in the vast majority of pregnancies. Women don't win anything extra from pregnancies. Children are expensive and child support isn't a meal ticket, it's to support the child/ren. Women have a huge amount to lose (medically, financially, career wise) with any pregnancy. The child is almost always the inventive, not any man or his 'resources'
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/23 05:56 PM
4

The men who claim to have been baby trapped don't tend to be prince charmings/chads. More likely to be underachievers who engage in risky behaviours. Women are not as desperate to lock them down as they think. Just because a woman keeps her own accidentally conceived child does not mean it was all an elaborate plot to keep that man or his genetics in her life at any cost. Women don't have romantic fantasies about coparenting with men who don't want them or their child.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/23 01:29 PM
10

People are deliberately choosing to have fewer/no children but I don't believe despising the opposite gender is a major factor in this
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/23 12:36 PM
1

I've had dates with men which have gone well but not resulted in a relationship. You can get along with someone without being ultimately compatible. There are plenty of men I would give a positive review for even though we aren't together. Thinking in this kind of binary fashion isn't logic and isn't helpful to a discussion about human experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/23 09:40 AM
9

What do you expect women to do about men's mental health? I've supported many of my male friends when they've been depressed, because men are actually more comfortable opening up in the softer, safe space of a female presence. But what I see time and time again is men feeling like they can't talk to other men about mental health, they know their friends, fathers, uncles, role models have suffered but in my experience they don't know why or turn to them for support. Myself as a self defined femin…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/23 12:33 PM
16

They feel rejected, maybe because of their looks, social standing or obsession with teenagers, and they're trying to make grown women feel rejected too. Perhaps out of spite, or to try and knock women down a peg to 'level the playing field'. They don't understand love.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/23 09:11 AM
2

As soon as we started talking, no one else compared. After the second date I deleted my profiles, before we had slept together. We are planning our wedding now. I will never love anything else as much as I love this man. When you know, you know.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/22 12:49 AM
1

If it's not that hard it can be split equally. Or maybe men should just do it all. So women have nothing to complain about and have all the time in the world for sex. After all, it's not that hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 01:45 PM
14

I am not sure this is as true as you would think. Porn related erectile and libido issues are extremely prevalent in today's men.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 01:14 PM
3

Yes sure. But every year you are out of the job market, your value diminishes. In case of divorce or some other terrible circumstances, many modern women much prefer to maintain their careers, even if the average female salary is still lower than that of a man's.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:48 PM
4

This is all completely besides the point. The post is about why women stop wanting sex. If you believe "I earn more, therefore I deserve to have my partner do my housework regardless of how exhausted they may be", it's very obvious why she might not want to have sex. When my partner was working 7 days a week I did all of the housework, even though I was paid twice as much as him. We had similar levels of energy left at the end of each day. Now he can earn my annual salary in a week and we look a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:43 PM
7

Value is subjective. Clearly the woman would be valuable to the simp. If you disagree, why not move on instead of getting upset about a woman not being worthy of attention in your eyes?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:31 PM
4

Well obviously if I make more money per hour than x, my time is obviously more valuable than x. Only to your employer. Would you expect your parents to treat your time as more valuable than a lower paid sibling? Or does this kind of 'logic' have no place in interpersonal relationships? On the contrary, the US has government backed student loans. It's literally never been easier The world isn't the US, and the ability to take out a loan doesn't magically create the time and lack of other obligati…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:29 PM
6

How do you know your assessment of value is correct and not the "simps" assessment?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:21 PM
9

This is ignoring that further education is actually a privilege that not everyone is able to attain. And insisting that your min-wage partner does all the housework to make up for your optional schooling also removes any spare time they may have to pursue similar opportunities themselves. It's lovely when people can get an education and better themselves. What isn't lovely is assuming that makes you and your time more important than your partner and their time. If you want your wife to have some…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:18 PM
3

The point of both working is so they maintain independence. You can't have your spouse quit work to handle all the chores then complain about spousal maintainance in a divorce, if they've sacrificed their independence to support your lifestyle. Sure, the higher earner could outsource their share of housework. But when they come home from their cushy office job and have spare time and no household obligations, I wouldn't expect the lower earner who has had a longer, harder day, then comes home to…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 12:13 PM
24

Basing chores on income isn't very fair either. Lots of minimum wage workers have very physically demanding jobs, and lots of higher earners have far less exhausting jobs often with shorter hours and more perks. A split of household chores is fair when both parties have a similar amount of time and energy left after fulfilling both their home/work obligations.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/22 08:19 AM
3

You've just listed hobbies, that's not a personality. The similarities OP is talking about are things like values, goals, sense of humour, communication style, maybe even a similar taste in media. No, your gf probably doesn't want to spend 24/7 with you and your hobbies, that would be unhealthy anyway. But if you have the basics in common you're much more likely to find common activities.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/22 09:47 AM
0

Women's pregnancy hormones are the whole reason you, I and everyone else is alive bro. No one said they're not rational.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:45 PM
1

This is a total fantasy situation. Condoms are not perfect, and some bitches be crazy. If you take the risks, you may have to pay the price. Choose better. Child support is means tested. No man is being billed $2k a month without any way of being able to live afterwards. Some of my friends dads were only ordered to pay $10 a week, a pathetic amount.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:43 PM
2

Yep - paying a nominal amount towards a child you have no physical responsibility for, as a consequence of your own choices, seems absolutely fair in contrast to forcing someone into a medical procedure which is potentially physically and mentally devastating, and in conflict with all of their biologically programmed instincts.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:37 PM
1

women just think men should have all of the consequences What planet are you living on? Obviously women bear the vast, vast majority of consequences with ANY pregnancy outcome. And children cost a lot more to raise than the majority of child support payments provide. Men already have very few obligated consequences from a pregnancy - this post is to argue why they shouldn't be able to choose "none".
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:31 PM
5

Men get to choose a guaranteed "no consequence" before he has sex. After conception, a consequence is guaranteed for the woman, and is a possibility for the man. That is the legal reality of the world we live in, and in my opinion a fair one.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:23 PM
2

I am simply explaining the logic behind the actual, real system used in the west - that men sign themselves up for the risk of being a father (at least in the financial responsibility sense) as soon as they make the decision to have heterosexual intercourse. This isn't misandrist - its accepting the reality that their actions may have consequences. Just as women have no choice but to accept the same when faced with choosing a pregnancy outcome.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:19 PM
4

I absolutely feel for those men, and it must be very difficult. I do think that the due diligence around this falls into the "initial gamble" category - choosing a mate with the same principles as yourself. However this post is solely about men who believe they should be able to impregnate women and then have the choice absolve themselves of all responsibility towards the situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:15 PM
4

Yep - they have 3 options: keep the child, adopt or abort. There is no "no consequence" option. None of the options are easy. Which is why men have no "no consequence" option either. Often I see men on reddit saying "she can just abort" like that isn't a potentially devastating event.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:10 PM
4

Both men and women have their chance to "opt out" before having sex. After conception there is no fair argument that a man should have the choice to absolve himself of any "side effect" - the side effect already exists and he already made the choice to accept that. The vasectomy example was to illustrate this, not a serious suggestion (in case you didn't pick up on that).
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 02:05 PM
3

No men are forced to raise children. Pay for them maybe - but no one is forced to raise a child.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:58 PM
4

5-7% of abortions result in infertility. If men are forced to buy a ticket for raffle with a 1/20 chance of being made to have a vasectomy every time they sign a financial abortion (with your chances increasing with every round!) sure - maybe that would be viable. But I don't see it being popular, even if it levels the playing field.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:56 PM
3

They have equal rights to prevent conception by using contraception, vasectomies etc, or abstaining. After conception it is past the point of equal rights as the burden is on the woman. And this is the reality of all Western legal systems for that reason. Abortions are not a pleasant or even neutral experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:51 PM
1

The paragraph starts with "both parties". The choice to take the risk is on both.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:44 PM
7

My point is that past conception, women are not able to opt out of consequences. Which is why men are not able to make the choice of "no consequence" for themselves either.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:43 PM
3

The consequences of conception can of course be positive for any or all of the parties involved - but a consequence nonetheless.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:41 PM
5

I assume by "paper abortion" you are referring to a man absolving himself of parental responsibility. This doesn't erase consequences of the act - just consequences for the man. And that is the reason why they do not exist, and if they ever would, should only be with agreement of the woman who still bears consequences.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 01:40 PM
16

Every single mother I know is single because the father exited the relationship / family after the child/ren were born. And ultimately very single mother was created by a man. I hate hearing men say "get an abortion/adopt" - as you clearly have no idea how physically and emotionally traumatic those experiences are. The same men who say they can't control their hormonal urges to think about fucking teenagers expect women to override their hormonal urges to love and raise their own child. Because …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/22 12:59 PM
-2

Controversial, but I have only ever lied to my partner. He's never asked my n-count but whenever he's asked about my previous sexual experiences I tell him I was a virgin when we met, and ask 'is he trying to tell me there are other people besides him who have penises'?!?! He knows I'm joking, I'm nearly 30 with several LTRs behind me. I will never ask about his experiences, I don't want the answers in my head. He's more secure than me in that respect, but if he ever had an insecure moment I wou…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/22 02:45 PM
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