malsell Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
2	What is the occupation of your STBXW or Ex-Wife? Office Manager at a local grocery store.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/06/26 04:50 PM
2	Since when is child support until 21? California from some of the divorce settlements I have seen	/r/Divorce_Men	27/05/26 02:55 PM
2	Since when is child support until 21? It is different state to state. I have seen some states that have it up to 26.	/r/Divorce_Men	27/05/26 01:52 PM
2	Was the divorce your fault? There were problems on both sides. I can list off all the stuff she thinks I did wrong and all the things she did wrong, but really it all boiled down to once she had what she wanted from me, and my financial situation changed, she decided to end things at that point. I am not going to say that I wasn't researching child support rates years before then myself. I just was willing to keep going for the kids sake and she wasn't	/r/Divorce_Men	13/04/26 05:44 PM
10	Opinion Needed: Splitting an Expense Hard no. She's the one choosing to send them on the trip, she needs to pay for it, or her parents can pay to stay with them.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/02/26 03:53 PM
7	She doesn't want less money despite the significant changes If you got an increase in income, I bet she would take you to court in a heartbeat to get it increased.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/01/26 06:57 PM
1	How can I help my dad? I've not dealt with this personally, however my uncle went through something similar with my cousin's mom. A few years after the divorce, he got fired from his position at one factory and went to work for another factory. My ex aunt waited until my cousin was a senior in highschool and took him back to court to argue his wages and 401k were different and had been for several years and that he should have been the one to notify the court to have adjustments made to the divorce to include his curr…	/r/Divorce_Men	15/12/25 06:38 PM
6	I just want her to admit that she regrets it! I got a laugh at mine Saturday and it was almost as good. She said the shop she takes it to said she has low transmission fluid but it wasn't low enough to be an issue. Well, I er this cold snap, apparently it had been slipping. He boyfriend "added transmission fluid" to it. I get there on Friday to pick up the kids and I'm like, sure I will check the fluid level. Well, there was an 8mm bold holding in the transmission dipstick and her boyfriend didn't have anything to take the bolt out with. On…	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/25 07:03 PM
5	Why did therapy not work? Be honest, don’t give me the polite, mature answer. Oh, don't get me wrong, she's the one that actually initiated therapy and divorce, I was just already checked out mentally. It went about how you would suspect with the therapist (also female) siding with the ex on just about everything, including that money I had made before our marriage should be spent on whatever my ex wanted to spend it on because it was now "our" money, even if I wanted it saved. That my money was our money, but the ex was "valid" in keeping her money separate for her own u…	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/25 06:09 PM
11	Why did therapy not work? Be honest, don’t give me the polite, mature answer. Because the relationship was already dead by the time it had been suggested. I had really hit my final straw about 3 years beforehand, but was just there for the kids.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/25 05:53 PM
24	“He’s a good man, but…” My ex would constantly downplay anything that was not done directly for her. Working overtime...that was more time I should have been with her. Change the oil in the cars...I could have been doing laundry. Replace the brakes on her car...I could have been doing the dishes. I talk to a co-worker about issues, that's emotional cheating...she does the same and that's "just a friend". So glad to be out of that relationship.	/r/Divorce_Men	21/11/25 03:18 PM
5	The unanswered “why?” I will say, there was, and maybe still is, a trend with divorce lawyers pulling this stuff with domestic violence claims or worse to try to get additional money for their client and try to force a full custody over to their client. Even when it is unfounded, they will often try to use this claim as hard evidence against you. I used to see it happen to a lot of my coworkers in the 90s especially. I had one female I knew that was pressured into filing an EPO and claims of domestic violence or a la…	/r/Divorce_Men	22/10/25 03:17 PM
2	Ex is now homeless. Can I get full custody? If you can (1) prove the ex is homeless and (2) prove detrimental conditions, you will have a strong case. I would, as others have said, offer to keep your son overnight (especially on colder nights) . What you don't want to do is create a hostile situation, especially if you don't have all of the facts. The thing is, unless you can prove unsafe living conditions, it isn't likely to go anywhere in court. "Camping" in and of itself isn't considered "unsafe". I understand your concerns, but someti…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/10/25 11:19 AM
6	What did you learn from your divorce? 1) never trust that a person truly is the way they portray themselves, especially in the beginning of a relationship. 2) know your partner's finances 3) make the rules before getting serious 4) stand your ground 5) be prepared	/r/Divorce_Men	13/10/25 07:10 PM
2	How do I avoid getting fucked in the divorce (ca)? Purchase a house or rent an apartment in a state that isn't an at fault state and file for divorce there.	/r/Divorce_Men	24/09/25 01:21 AM
1	"I don't care about her income" Unfortunately, it happens more often than people think because those charts are only recommendations in most states and haven't always existed	/r/Divorce_Men	16/07/25 01:02 PM
6	"I don't care about her income" The sad part is, this can vary wildly depending on circumstances. I know of couples that were coworkers and paid equally and the man still lost the house to the woman and paid alimony without infedelity or a prenuptial. Sometimes it's who has the better lawyer and sometimes it's a judge trying to send a message	/r/Divorce_Men	15/07/25 04:03 PM
1	Why Did My Wife and Kids Just Ghost Me? Seeking Insight and Support I didn't experience this personally, however, I have seen this quite a bit with others, including family members. This was a tactic I have seen suggested by lawyers to further undermine and alienate one of the spouses, most times, the husband. The other parent will often start on the kids years before the actual divorce and start telling the kids that the reason they didn't get what they wanted all these years is because of things the other parent did and at times they will even try to encourage…	/r/Divorce_Men	15/07/25 12:01 AM
1	First nights without the kids I still try to keep myself busy. It's been 2 years now and on the nights I don't have them it is still rough. I don't drink so I usually turn to gaming.	/r/Divorce_Men	14/07/25 05:35 PM
1	Should I Take Her back? Where I grew up, a wake is a somber occasion, not a party.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/07/25 05:41 PM
1	Should I Take Her back? A wake and a party are two different things. You put in your post it was a party	/r/Divorce_Men	12/07/25 04:23 PM
2	Should I Take Her back? Dude, no. No to both of these women. If your ex wanted to separate because you were "emotionally unavailable", that tells me she was already shopping around and found someone else. That didn't work out as she planned and you're her "fallback" until she finds something better again. If you're girlfriend of 2 years couldn't be there with your family and instead decided to go party, that's where her priorities are and you should just move on.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/07/25 04:13 PM
3	Deep depression Every single day. I don't have the time or money for therapy or anything of that nature. I just try to stay busy and keep going the best that I can	/r/Divorce_Men	28/03/24 09:36 PM
3	Preparing uncontested divorce agreement Any debts/bills.	/r/Divorce_Men	28/03/24 12:32 AM
1	How do you cope with the anger and frustration that your spouse triggers in you? Having my kids every possible waking moment and gaming.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/03/24 09:32 PM
2	Unsure… It sounds like you need to get away together. Even if it's just for a day and just going to a beach or a park and reconnecting on a level without all the stress. Money issues and time issues are always going to be a part of running a business and if you're working a full-time job on top of this it's just more stress. I would also advise taking a hard look at the finances and seeing if you committing that full-time labor to the business wouldn't help it enough that you could quit your other job.	/r/Divorce_Men	23/03/24 03:43 PM
2	Self-worth is gone Same here. Just have to keep pushing through it and try do do your best each day	/r/Divorce_Men	21/03/24 05:21 PM
2	What are you eating? Sandwiches, frozen pizza, just about anything quick I can nuke.	/r/Divorce_Men	21/03/24 04:54 AM
1	Today would of been the 4 year anniversary of the marriage between my ex and myself 3/15 would have been our 13th	/r/Divorce_Men	19/03/24 08:25 PM
3	She moved on super quick Yeah, one of my biggest problems now is I also hate my job. I kept the position so that I could stay home and take care of the kids and kinda feel a bit stuck because of work and school schedules.	/r/Divorce_Men	19/03/24 08:11 PM
5	She moved on super quick Don't have to worry about the creeping back stuff, that's not happening. Just trying to find ways to creep forward myself. Still getting used to the idea of being alone again. With rent, the kids, food, bills, unexpected expenses I don't have the time and/or money to meet people. Doesn't help that I work from home either	/r/Divorce_Men	19/03/24 06:46 PM
9	She moved on super quick My ex introduced me to her new "work bestie" in mid 2022, decided we were having "problems and I needed to change" in January 2023 after being together for 14 years. By February I was sleeping on the couch and looking for a new place to live. I moved out the last day of July and he moved in the middle of September. I am 47, ex is 46 and her new guy is 20.	/r/Divorce_Men	19/03/24 06:14 PM
18	What is the worst thing your ex ever did to you? When I moved in with her (she owned her house, or the bank did and she was paying a mortgage and I was renting) I opened my finances to her and she knew about my retirement account from my previous job (I quit my job to move where she lived and took another position). At first I took over finances and would pay all bills immediately, this was an issue for her because it limited her spending ability at times. So I let her take over the finances. 6 years into our relationship, I never checked in o…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/03/24 01:32 PM
1	In the shortest way possible, if someone were to ask you to describe the loving relationship you have with your son, what would you say exactly? My son is 7 and is autistic with sensory processing disorder. I just know he loves me and I love him and it's killing the ex that he cries almost every day he doesn't come home with me.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/03/24 03:12 AM
1	Sitting sick at home Been going through the ups and downs myself for the last 8 months. First she cut off sex, then started making excuses about my work and not wanting me to wake her up so I just slept on the couch, then said she couldn't do it anymore and wanted a divorce. I had to hide money just to have enough to move out and then my grandmother died the week I wanted to move and had to delay that even longer. 8 months later, I haven't met anyone new, my best friends are my family members, and I don't have any r…	/r/Divorce_Men	15/03/24 03:06 AM
7	How do you deal with the loneliness I try to fill the void with randomness and things that make me feel a bit more human. I sometimes escape into a video game or get something small for myself every once in a while. Having the kids here as much as possible helps as well sometimes, but they can also just remind me of how alone I am when it comes to a companion.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/03/24 01:20 PM
2	I am way too old to feel this way about a woman (post divorce dating) I have been much quicker to anger, but that stuff normally just blows over. Just trying to be real to myself. I am trying to better myself, but I am in much worse shape now than I was when I was still in my early 30s and got with my now ex. I will be 48 next month with 4 fairly young children (13, 11 and twins that will be 8 next month) I went from paying off the ex's house to having very little in a one bedroom apartment and making it paycheck to paycheck and even then, I am stretching things t…	/r/Divorce_Men	12/03/24 11:06 PM
2	I am way too old to feel this way about a woman (post divorce dating) I am happy for you. I doubt I will ever feel that again	/r/Divorce_Men	12/03/24 10:29 PM
10	The removed this post within 3 minutes lol: "The chores lie" My ex used to complain about this as well and never consider all the DIY stuff I did as well. Fixing plumbing, running new electrical, etc.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/03/24 03:23 AM
2	Why 50/50 I get it. I have 4 kids (13, 11 and twin 7 year olds). I, thankfully, work from home currently so it gives me more time with them, but between rent, bills, food, I don't have much of anything left over. I have my 13 year old full time and the others are with me 2-3 nights a week. I used to travel quite a lot for work in the past and I have no clue how I would juggle that and the kids	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/24 09:42 PM