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moviecooknl Archive

View 0 posts and 210 comments by moviecooknl on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Depends on the situation; did you do the break-up or is it reversed and how long is the relationship in question? In my case I was mostly the one that initiated the break-up, in those cases I was already mentally over the LTR. Still, I never had an issue to start dating soon even after I wasn't the one that initiated the break-up.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/22 10:45 AM
0

If you state you value happiness based upon on others and their relationship, you have crappy values and you’re prone to be fucked over. Happiness is something you experience on an individual and long term level, you should never experience that based upon the experience of others or how they prentend to be around you or on short term aspects. I can be happy when eating pizza for example. Me eating pizza every day will probably make me overweight and die earlier. So short term happiness will pro…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/21 06:09 PM
2

Honestly this is the most fucked op advice I’ve ever heard: surround yourself with people who have a happy relationship…. Do never underestimate the aspect of looking good for others while your life is shit or in shambles, this is extremely the case with people who state they have a happy relationships for the public but in the end are miserable and end up in divorce or breaking up. No: surround yourself who have the same core values as you and respect and accept your boundaries and vice versa. …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/21 05:51 PM
2

There's a big difference in accepting somebody's opinion every time and again for small unimportant stuff or acting like a girls best gay friend while changing his needs and wants and foregoing his personal boundaries and/or values for a woman with the sole reason to get in her pants. That last person is the definition of being a fake persona, a doormat and it's really unattractive. Not only to women, but also to others because he's prone to get used by others, he'll be at a (social and/or profe…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/21 05:25 AM
4

As you described men (and women) are human beings. Emotions in general are short term experiences and not a good sole foundation for committing to an romantic relationship, the ability to express emotional intimacy in healthy way is. Human beings shouldn't rely solely on the experience of (feeling) emotions and/or the aspect of falling in love first to have sex or to commit to a romantic relationship. Mainly because human beings can easily have sex with other people because of lust, the only thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/21 06:02 AM
1

No, PUA is part of the Manosphere which consists of many idealogies: TRP, MRP, PUA, Incel, BP, MGTOW, etc, etc. Having said that, they might use or agree on (parts of) the idealogies in question, they have different ideas on how to accomplish this in actions. For example: TRP states that aspect of game is important and game is also a(n important) part of PUA.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/21 10:49 AM
1

Your morals on that aspect is not for you to enforce on others. IMHO dating is nothing more than a vetting process to check out if your date is compatible on aspects of values, interests, goals, attractiveness and/or (sexual) chemistry. By not dating multiple people: who's to say that he or she is missing out on that better person who'll make him or her life happier/completed only because they've decided to exclusively date a single person even though their date hasn't been proper vetted and wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/21 11:15 AM
3

It's all based on values; for most of us living in Western countries the aspect of arranged marriage is frowned upon because it's an old tradition that lacks the aspect of free will and selection of a spouse in full mostly because of social pressure from his or her parents as well as the stigma on not accepting the aspects of being attracted to the same gender. And even though arranged marriages has a divorce rate of less that 10% and it allows guys to find a spouse easier compared to the curren…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/21 09:02 AM
5

Doesn't matter: dressing (up) nice and make sure you look decent and that you can take care of yourself no matter the (social) occasion or your gender is called being a fucking adult . And as such it doesn't give you additional bonus points, special considerations or a right towards a(n expensive) free dinner.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/21 02:30 PM
3

Fair enough. I would never decide to live together nor be in a relationship with somebody if we're not compatible on values, relationship goals, etc. Personally I think that 50/50 on aspects of combined living expenses should be the norm if you decide to live together unless finances are very unbalanced. For example: You can't expect a partner who works at McDonalds to pay half the rent for a condo that's 2000 a month.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/21 07:11 AM
3

Depends if they're married with a prenup (which is default in The Netherlands) and what they put in writing; but in general combined/marital finances and expenses (like debts) built up during marriage are 50/50 with exception of finances and expenses (like debts) on personal level and how it's legally notarized. So if you make the choice to setup a combined savings account and fill that up according to your example, if it's both in name of the husband and wife it's going to be split 50/50 at the…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/21 06:48 AM
2

Honest question: Why would you make a choice to be in a relationship with someone and to live together while you both work and you're not willing to pay 50/50 for all expenses considered combined living expenses, buying of new furniture, home improvements, etc?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/21 06:19 AM
18

After all, our effort goes into spending too much time and money on hair and makeup, picking out clothes we think he’ll like, making sure we smell good, shaving and tweezing, brushing our teeth a second time, wiping down our high heels, etc. I agree, we men don't do any of that; we show up in clothes that have been worn for 3 days straight, don't shave, don't brush, don't go to the barber, etc because we don't make any time and effort to look good as well (for our date).... This is the exact rea…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/21 05:59 AM
4

I expect that my partner is financially independent and she doesn't have to give details as long as she fills up our combined bank account we have setup for our living expenses (rent, gas, power, water, groceries, insurances, internet,etc) and as long as her (previous) financial choices doesn't have influence on mine or the combined bank account. We both have our own accounts and we don't have justify our spending (to each other). However, we do have a notarized document that has all the informa…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/21 05:45 AM
3

A(n established) right (as law) to a basic need doesn't mean you're entitled to it without any additional frame, boundaries and/or consquences. A right (on basic needs) doesn't mean that you as an indivual have to comply if it goes against another right or rule in accordance to laws or because it goes against established treaties: no right is absolute and every right is legally framed with exceptions. For example: there's also the basic right of free will and/orchoice with who you want to have s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/21 09:23 AM
4

In the Netherlands Sex is considered a basic need and considered a human right to such a point that people with disabilities are able to visit (specialized) prostitutes which is fully endorsed as disabled care and subsidized by the (local) government and/or health insurance companies.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/21 05:47 AM
3

It's quite easy: politics and religion is a personal choice for yourself; as long as your core values and (relationship)goals align and you both have respect and acceptance for each other boundaries than there shouldn't be an issue. From a practical standpoint: Keep in mind we have a lot of political parties and most of the time our government consists of at least 3 parties which don't necessarily has to be all right or left on the political spectrum. Also our personal choice for supporting/voti…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/21 02:08 PM
8

I will never compromise on core values and/or boundaries. If I communicate "No", it's not going to happen and I won't change my mind. Luckily my wife has almost the same core values, (relationship) goals and we do things and enjoy things (together or alone) that it's in line with our core values, our personal values and with respect and acceptance for each other boundaries. My wife is religious, I'm not and I will not go to Church for example (she does) but she doesn't try to convert me or ask m…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/21 05:40 AM
1

Yes: Finasteride and Minoxidil can have very good results for 90% of the men who take this resulting in stopping the progression of hair loss, the receding and strengthening of hair on the scalp; so yes this will result in hair growth and faster regrowth for a number of people especially who are in the beginning stages of balding and/or receding hairlines. To be precise: over 48% of men in the age bracket of 18 till 40 experienced real improvement as in hair growth, 42% didn't see it get any wor…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/21 01:58 PM
3

As a previous balding guy which runs in the guy side of the family: If it's genetical I will call BS; you can't simply beat genetics and no shampoo/conditioner/medicine/hormones will resolve that, if you're lucky your balding pattern will be delayed short term at best and it's only a delay in your execution: you'll end up getting (mostly) bald but instead at 30 it'll be around 35. Instead of delaying, accept the outcome and use a 1mm clipper or shave your head. It's not also more easier to maint…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/21 10:32 AM
1

No, the golden rule for me was: Don't shit where you eat. I've seen it a number of times that when it goes wrong and if the guy is one that does the break-up, it resulted in a problematic work environment for the guy for at least a couple of months. Mainly because the female co-workers backed each other up and made him pay for it or because there were emotional breakouts (by the one that was dumped) which makes the work environment for all co-workers crap.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/21 05:16 AM
5

I feel like 90% of women would see that as “controlling” behavior even though the men in those situations usually have a right to be paranoid. Every time a healthy boundary is in conflict with the (possible) choice of another, it's always thought as controlling and they're right imho. However boundaries are black and white and the other person can make a choice to accept and respect the boundary or not giving a fuck and accept its consequences. And yes, the "Why are you so insecure? Don't you tr…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/21 05:47 AM
2

The easiest solution for this is not to be codependent and/or to validate your actions based upon social approval or to make other people happy. Your choices are your own and you do them for your own wants, needs, desires, happiness, etc in accordance of your boundaries and you take responsibility for them and its consequences. If you solely make choices solely based upon validation, to make others happy and/or social approval (of others), that's saying you don't have (healthy boundaries), you'r…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/21 05:26 AM
–

In my opinion there's no such thing as toxic masculinity like there's no toxic femininity; there's only a healthy and unhealthy way to express traits in accordance to your values, morals and boundaries. For example: the aspect of violence (towards others) is considered an unhealthy (and therefore toxic) trait in both guys and women, unless they serve in (for example) the army or in the police. Another example: the aspect of empathy is considered a healthy trait for both men and women, however wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/21 05:27 AM
2

Taking (healthy) risks is what gives you and yourself progress and if you're not taking risks it means you will not encounter those moments, problems, personality traits, values, relationship values, etc for you to learn what's acceptable (or not) or that you don't want (or do want) and for you to use to form healthy values and/or healthy boundaries. When it comes to dating and LTR's, it's about making sure you and your date are compatible on values and/or (respecting and accepting each others) …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/21 10:32 AM
1

Depends on your values: for me a value is that both me and my spouse is to be financial independent and that any financial providing are solely for family expenses (food, rent, bills for water, electrical, furniture replacement, home improvements, etc, etc) where both pick up the family tab based upon their financial situation. My investment is to provide stability and a safe home for my family, but not to be used solely as an ATM. Especially during my dating phase when I was 34+, most of the wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/21 06:29 AM
1

Yep. Because being interested is definitely not approaching her, asking her out and spending time with her for us to get to know each other better to find out if we're are compatible on things that we both think are important with the possibility to see if we both want to do a follow-up date.... If wasn't interested, I wouldn't make the effort to ask her out and/or willing to spend time in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 02:44 PM
1

Which I - as already stated - do (or did more precise) during..... coffee dates and (possible) follow-up dates!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 11:08 AM
1

No. My result is to have a partner who respects and accepts each other boundaries, who's mutual compatible on aspects of core values, relationship goals and sexual compatibility so we can have and maintain a healthy (romantic) relationship with respect of each others needs and wants so that we (can) add value to each other life's.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 10:59 AM
1

First: Who says I don't spend money on the 2nd date? I prefer to do active follow-up dates and its a very good (if not better) way to get to know each other better. Second: Who says I do 2nd dates with all the women I had drinks or a coffee dates with? Most of them didn't resolve in 2nd dates because our core values simply didn't match. Third: If you want to get each other to know better and vet/screen each other, you can also do that while chatting with simple drinks (in a public place), you do…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 10:04 AM
1

I don't have to spend money to show my affection or that I genuinely like a person. More importantly: I don't think it's a good value from a person who thinks that my affection towards that person should solely be based upon materialistic conditions and where the condition is to spend loads of money on a 1st date for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 08:31 AM
1

When it came to serious dating: most times the 2nd date ended in staying over and having sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 08:12 AM
1

Why not? You easily state: hey, I think you look beautiful. So lets grab coffee at Starbucks to get each other to know better and see if we match on more than looks. Worst thing that happens is that she declines. If she accepts, you can still get an indication of her personality and perhaps a follow up date.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 08:01 AM
1

Being more concrete works. But it's not a good idea if he chooses an expensive club/bar (or restaurant) because his actions would still indicate he has money and is willing to spend it without knowing her. I would keep it simple at first, a couple of drinks, coffee or tea. But I would never - and have never done - do a first date or cold approach and go to a restaurant, bistro, etc. In general going out for lunch or dinner was on the table after the 4th date.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 07:55 AM
2

So if you (as a guy) approach or match a woman who fits your attractiveness, why the fuck would you want to state that in your bio or towards her? And aspects of personality traits (submissive, motherly, nurturing, kind, etc) is something you can vet and/or screen while dating, you don't have to state that as well. Personally I think a guy should use actions, not words, and don't out your physical and/or personality preferences unless they're based upon healthy (relationship based) values and/or…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 07:45 AM
1

From my perspective if somebody would state the latter (I want to take you out), I would think he wants to do something more fancy (a dinner or something) and that also states he probably has money. Instead of stating to take her out, make it more simple and go just for drinks/coffee instead. And if she pushes for (you to make) a reservation instead; simply state you don't do that, you just want to do drinks. If she keeps pushing, simply walk away.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 07:17 AM
0

If that's the case most of the time, your vetting sucks. Period. So question: Considering you solely attract these kind of women, what are your own actions (so they have that impression) and what can you do about it yourself to make sure that its kept to a minimum?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 06:50 AM
5

Even though I'm (male) not on the dating market for 5 years, from my experience and being considered average (so not the 666-Chad, I would classify myself as a 7) it's worth it if you take care of yourself and how you look (be fit, lift, grooming, hygiene, etc), that you know how to flirt (read: having game), that you know what your values and boundaries are (communicating and defending them constructively), genuine about your intentions (ONS, FWB or something else) as well as being assertive an…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 05:45 AM
1

Not BP, but I would state: know your values, needs and wants and your boundaries. Communicate and defend your boundaries in a constructive way and do not accept anyone in your life (as your partner) who does not respect and accept your boundaries.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/21 05:22 AM
9

My personal opinion on the mindset of TRP/MRP is the prospect of unplugging you from the Disney fairy tale of a soul mate or the One and that by just being yourself, just being a Nice Guy (tm) and not embracing your masculine qualities will eventually get you to to date and/or be in a relationship even though there's a huge difference in the practical outcome and what you see happening around you. TRP/MRP gives you some insight on the reason, but more importantly TRP/MRP gives you tips you can i…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/21 11:21 AM
8

My personal opinion on Black Pilled guys is that they're basically victim puking about the current sexual dynamics and don't want to put in the effort to improve themselves on aspects of game, looks, getting fit, etc so that their attraction and SMV increases because women will select a guy solely based upon looks - which they think they can't do anything about - and nothing else.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/21 05:38 AM
2

The aspect of marriage (or wanting to marry) is a personal value on what you think is important when it comes to relational compatibility and values are nothing more than a Fuck Yes or a Fuck No decision. If you have doubts about foundational relationship values like marriage for whatever reason, it's a Fuck No.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/21 07:15 AM
3

It's about not being put in a situation where you know you don't match after a while and you still haven't received the main course let alone the desert. The effort is making time available to set up a date for us to get to know each other. A first date with just some drinks or coffee allows you to do just that what you describe without spending a shitload of money or to get in that situation I previously stated.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/21 11:44 AM
2

Considering I met my wife 4 years ago using OLD, yep. Most of my previous relationships were the result of OLD, just 1 was the result of dating because we met at a concert and hooked up afterwards. And the solution for not being used solely for free dinners is simple: Don't do dates in the beginning that costs (shitload of) money. All dates were coffee/drink dates first, active dates afterwards and dinner dates were perhaps after the 4th or 5th date. If they're really into you, they won't mind n…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/21 10:45 AM
1

It's not about effort matching (in life), it's about their (current) core values and morals. Why? Upbringing, past actions and past experiences during their life eventually evolved to their current core values and morals. Instead of focusing solely at their past or their effort, look at their current core values and morals and if they line up with their actions now. If they line up with yours and you find her or him (sexually) attractive, it shouldn't matter from which socioeconomic background t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/21 06:31 AM
1

Not giving a fuck is not saying to not give any fucks at all about anything, it's saying to give a fuck what you give priority to, your problems and resolving them, what you can control, what you're responsible for, your values, your boundaries and genuinely care about and not giving a fuck about all other things like opinions of other people, bullshit from others, the need to always compromise, to change your own values and/or boundaries for others, etc, etc no matter the consequences. Confiden…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/21 08:06 AM
1

Maybe the men who are into TRP or seduction or whatever are going about it wrong when it comes to how to become one of these guys, but the fact remains that men do want to become one of these guys, not one of the guys who makes a woman attracted to him gradually over time like how typical female sexuality works. The biggest issue is with most guys who go for TRP and use it solely as a "how do I get laid"-strategy is they think it's like an IKEA manual which you can follow from A to Z and a woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/21 01:47 PM
35

The couple of relationships I've seen happening with men having Dark Triad personality is where the woman had experienced abandonment issues with their parents (mostly because their biological dad wasn't in the picture) which resulted in anxious attachment style and one of those traits is being heavily codependent. I belief there has been a couple of studies on this and if I remember on of the results was that both anxious and avoidant attached people are more attracted to people with a Dark Tri…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/21 11:23 AM
3

It's the aspect of Sexual Market Value (SMV) and his or her value in the Sexual Market Place (SMP) as well as the intention (short term vs long term). When it comes to casual sex, looks matter most. So a woman who - in your example is classified as a 6 - who wants casual sex will reject anybody considered a 6 or lower because she knows she can land a 7 or a 8 without that many issues. It's easy to test: just look at the number of potential Tinder matches a woman will get compared to a guy when t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/21 12:59 PM
1

Full Disclosure: I'm a guy (40+) and married. Yeah, it was a blame post and I quote: Honestly, I’m a little resentful towards the women that mislead me at that early stage in my life Yes, you can be pissed about somebody's bad advice; but no matter that you're still solely responsible for your own actions and its consequences. So instead you should be pissed at yourself: you followed their advice and (as I read it) for a long time while it didn't give the result you wanted and keep doing it. The…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/21 07:23 AM
3

First: advice is just advice, it's up to you and your own choice if you want to follow up on that advice. If the advice doesn't give you the desired outcome, it's your own choice to act on it and therefore your own fault and not of those who gave you the advice. Second: They advice you to be a good guy who takes good care of himself first; instead your version of a Nice Guy (tm) is not a truly nice guy, in fact your version of the Nice Guy (tm) is simply a person who's using a fake identity that…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/21 06:57 AM
2

It shouldn't matter if you do it for a date, a night going out, going to work, remote meetings or going to an job interview: dress up accordingly for the moment and looking like you can take care of yourself is not game, it's just being a fucking adult. Game is just what the previous person stated: flirtation, escalation, little challenges, seduction, etc. I still game my wife, and not because I want to have sex but to show her I still think she's hot and sexy as fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/21 08:11 AM
8

When it comes to core-values and/or boundaries: I'm not willing (and never will be willing) to compromise on them and I expect my partner to do the same. If you do, they're not core-values and/or proper boundaries first place or you simply prone to unhealthy and/or relationships which feel like an emotional rollercoaster not to mention they're doomed to fail eventually. Give and take might work for certain things (like preferences for food, color of a couch, etc), not for core-values and/or boun…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/21 10:44 AM
2

I disagree to a point because it's to detailed, I would state a potential partner requires the following: Sexual chemistry, expectations, desire and attraction Mutual core values Respect for each others boundaries Mutual future expectations for the relationship (which also comes down to values)
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/21 10:30 AM
1

Cause it takes effort and according to Cosmo and all those Romantic and/or Disney movies it's all about character and the inside that counts! It's the "They should take me as I am!"-mantra or some bullshit...
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/21 09:39 AM
1

Everybody is all for (acting on) self improvement and they'll support that unless the positive results for that person (or those persons) has negative impact on others, their values and/or their interests.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/21 06:28 AM
3

How should balding/bald men under 30 who can’t fall back on being tall or good-looking approach dating, practically and philosophically? Being tall not withstanding, being good looking - even though this is a personal preference on what's considered good looking - is something you can do something about no matter if you're balding or not on a number of aspects (grooming, working out, dress up, etc). When you experience balding I would advice - unless you have issues with pimples, warts and such …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/21 07:28 AM
2

The difference between having a "loving" relationship between friends and/or family compared to an exclusive romantic relationship between partners is sex and committment by both. Both partners need to do that, period. If not than first take responsiblity for what you can change (attractiveness, owning your own shit and/or problems, etc) and if there's no change within a reasonable timeframe walk away (divorce/break up) while not foregoing your responsibilities in case you're a parent. When it c…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/21 09:43 AM
2

The lying, for starters. "Women like nice guys! Women like good men! Be yourself and good things will come your way!" Pro Tip: No matter if it's a guy or a woman, don't ever take what people say or write for face value but instead look at the RL actions of said person. Furthermore there's a big difference between a "Nice Guy (tm)" and a "Good Guy" especially when it comes to honesty about their intentions and their identity. A good guy doesn't have an issue with being honest and stay true to his…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/21 08:59 AM
8

COVID-19 or the pandemic is not the root cause, the root cause is lack of proper sexual education within the US. Based upon figures and statistics from European countries (like The Netherlands) on proper sexual education before they get sexual active have shown that it helps prevention of STD's and (for example) teen pregnencies and abortions (especially when it concerns teenagers).
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/21 07:29 AM
4

A constant and long dry spell - medical issues and/or medication withstanding - like what you read in /r/deadbedroom is the potential end of a romantic relationship (LTR) because it states "I don't find you attractive (any more) and I don't want to have sex with you". And I specifically state potential, because if you - as a guy - don't own your shit and work on yourself to become attractive again, it will be the end. Personally I think that if you've gone through the process of self-improvement…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/21 07:01 AM
3

Short version: from a TRP standpoint the sexual strategy is spinning plaits, vetting, etc and it's not adviced to commit yourself towards a marriage or a LTR because of the idea of "The Disney fairytale", "The One" or maybe because it's the very first women you meet and will have sex with you since the TRP strategy is working (for you). Why? Because it would mean you need to implement beta behaviour. Marriage or a LTR is TRP in hardcore mode and requires both a healthy mix of Alpha/Beta behaviou…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/21 08:00 AM
1

In my oppinion casual sex or hookups are just that, no matter the reason (end of a relationship, divorced, don't want anything serious, whatever) and women don't require to be drunk, high, in a playful and/or fun environment like a party, concert, whatever to experience that because of OLD-apps like Tinder nowadays.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/21 07:24 AM
2

If you mean by elder women in the agebracket of 28 till 38, be my guess ;) In any case, divorced women counted perhaps for 60% of my casual hookups while I was 30 till 35. The other 40% had a number of different reasons; most of them had to do with not wanting anything serious like a LTR, marriage, children, picket fence, etc, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/21 08:59 PM
3

During my hookup "phase" I mostly used Tinder and explicitly stated I was not looking for anything serious and I was not on Tinder to make friends. The meetups with my matches were primarily to check each other out and to see if there was sexual attraction and/or chemistry. From my personal experience women don't need to be drunk to go for a hookup. Women also experience lust and also have needs for some casual fun (in the bedroom) with a real person but without any strings attached; especially …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/21 07:50 PM
1

Every character trait has a healthy and unhealthy side and that also goes for the aspect of being dominant (both with males and females). Being dominant is mostly percieved in a negative way to be (fully) controlling on the needs and wants of his or hers partner including his or hers life where the partner has no say in his or her own choices, values and/or boundaries (its all about the dominant person in the relationship) to a point that the partner is expected to be obedient or face consequenc…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/21 09:56 AM
1

> FDS women have unrealistic expectations when engaging with the world. If you are in public, there is nothing wrong with someone talking to you and saying hey. Doesn't matter from which perspective or dating strategy this comes from; it's a matter of decency and boundaries to and from both women and guys. So as long as they adhere to the standards of deceny while respecting the boundaries of said person I don't see an issue if a guy or woman approaches somebody else. If he or she ignores you or…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/21 07:33 AM
3

In OLD stating height preference in their profile is a thing with women in The Netherlands to a point they state not to bother sending them a message/like/whatever if your height is below a specific height.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/21 01:14 PM
1

To be more detailed: screening of the profiles on text, pictures, etc. The information provided on the OLD was not enough for them to screen men on Google/Facebook/whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/21 08:24 AM
1

Even though I'm not a woman, I can tell you that my wife told me that she screened her potential online matches with her sister, her mother and a couple of girlfriends on a number of aspects. In fact I was the 3rd in her top 5. Needless to say I became number 1 after the 1st date ;)
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/21 07:38 AM
5

This is the deal breaker for me; especially being attracted towards me for the sole purpose of being an ATM and/or I that I'm primarily allowed to have sex after spending money and/or giving materialistic items. For me the reason that potential LTR prospects needed to be financially independent.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/21 07:33 AM
4

They can't solve their own problems what so ever. They always need men to do the hard shit for them. Yes they can and no they don't men to do all the hard shit (for whatever that means). And my experience is that women you're describing is basically every woman who wasn't hot enough go get what they wanted immediately, or daddy stopped paying the bills and they need "help". No matter what, women like this will find the help they want, because men are desperate. Fuck me, I must be lucky with all …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/21 03:13 PM
3

Men try to solve womens problems, women laugh and ridicule mens A simple solution: Never ever solve the problem of a woman, be honest about your conditions if you can solve it or when they ask for advice simply redirect it with the simple phrase "What do you think you can do about it yourself to fix it?". Women are adult human beings that can solve their own problems, so let them, not to mention that most women find men who always wants to solve their problems very unattractive. My experience is…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/21 12:07 PM
1

Women get more sympathy and emotional support from other women for sure and yes, there's a difference in which emotions you as a guy can vent and honestly communicate to both men and women. Your problems are your responsibility to own and fix. So whining about an issue to get sympathy and attention as a guy and blaim it on others and/or not bringing a resolution for yourself is unattractive as fuck to both men and women because it means you're not willing to take action or not willing to take re…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/21 09:39 AM
1

If there's children involved that also means that as both the mother and a father you have responsibilities (towards them) when it comes to financial support, upbringing, being a part of their lives, etc towards his child or children; a divorce or break-up doesn't change your responsibilities. Here in The Netherlands co-parenting is the default unless one of the parents is deemed unfit, they agree different or if one of the parents decide not to fulfill their responsibilities at a later point. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/21 07:57 AM
1

It's too easy to just say "The man didn't make her happy". But that's what they say, as they empty his wallet. I've heard it a number of times, including the I don't understand, we had it good. Multiple vacations every year. I did everything for her. etc. I would simply state that the reason is that his wife lost attraction for him and maintaining attraction is (or was) his responsibility. That can be for a number of reasons, but mostly I see it happen because of loss of frame and/or becoming fu…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/21 05:26 PM
3

When it comes to casual hookups it comes down to: - Mutual attraction - Mutual (sexual) chemistry The difference between a casual hookup and a LTR (or Marriage) comes down to the following additions: - Having mutual core-vaues and mutual relationship goals - Having respect for each others values, goals and boundaries These are linked together and should be the foundation of a LTR (if not vetting your potential partner). People change and therefore values change which will eventually lead to conf…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/21 09:53 AM
7

Women will mostly sleep with guys and have (casual) sex with them if they feel sexual attraction towards that person and that could be of looks and/or impressing them with their abilities, personality, intelligence, charm, etc which translates simply to flirting and having game. Even in the modern dating scene (Tinder, dating apps, etc) this is still key for a woman to date a person and to perhaps have (casual) sex with him. Taking out these conditions will eventually mean that you're taking out…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/21 08:36 AM
2

First strategies and/or lifestyles like PUA, Tradcon, MGTOW, Black Pilled, etc are part of the manosphere and are not the same as RP as stated with TRP and/or MRP. While certain aspects/details from the manosphere versions are incorperated into all strategies and/or lifestyles to a certain degree, they also have completely different (practical) interpretations on your own responsibilities and/or role as a guy (or a woman) when it comes to dating/relationships. But if SHE wants to finesse a man o…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/21 12:36 PM
3

Question 1: Do you believe that relationships that end up long-term, won't end up in marriage and that it is a red flag, or not a good sign? No. Depending on where you live - for example Western Europe in my case - the aspect of marriage is considered an old tradition that has other options with the same legality as marriage and/or taking (judicial/fincancial) responsibility in case there's children involved. Question 2: Why do couples who are together for more than 5 years to over a decade, onc…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/21 08:23 AM
1

Effective conversations about what exactly? Your issues in dating are your issues and also your issues to resolve, you date to effectively screen/vet the other person to see you're compatible (look, appareance, sexual chemistry, mutual desire, preferences, values, etc) For the casual hook-up; looks, appereance, sexual chemistry and mutual desire is enough. When it comes to a (serious) LTR most of the time it comes down to compatibility on personal core values and/or relationship goals; on these …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/21 08:22 AM
0

It's my experience that chads and/or womanizers are not put on a pedestal by guys, instead they're mostly used as an excuse for their own failures/insecurities towards women or to be jealous off.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/21 10:31 AM
1

For wanting a relationship, both women and guys in general: 1. Looks/Appereance 2. Mutual Chemistry & Desire 3. Mutual compatibility & respect (core values, boundaries, sexual and relationship goals) Guys also require additional top 3 traits: 1. Frame/Identity 2. Game 3. Be responsible (embracing their positive masculine traits, be able to provide security and stability, be and act like an adult, etc) Women also require additional top 3 traits: 1. Feminime/Sexy (not just appereance, but also in …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/21 09:57 AM
3

First: Being attractive is not solely being physical attractive - which can help to be desired for sure - but also being in line with your own identity (values, boundaries, hobbies, long term goals, personality traits, embracing your masculine qualities, etc) which is based upon your needs and wants and not on the needs and wants of somebody else or what a women expects you to be. To get attention from others (compliments, to be desired or to see results in dating) is more of a side product and …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/21 08:35 AM
2

Your examples have never been the case with me. But I know a number of women fell for it and most of it could be prevented by doing a proper check of that person on social media or to do a simple image reverse search. For me catfishing is also using photo's of a younger self or using a certain kind of pov to give the impression that you have certain physical features while the years have not been kind (read: fit person on picture with a killer body while during your meet they look more like a Gr…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/21 01:38 PM
1

What's good? What I think is good for myself because it gives me pleasure, doesn't mean it's also good for my wife or gives her pleasure. And that's the problem; people base their relationship on things like pleasure and happy emotions. And if you happen to solely base the aspect of a good relationship on things like pleasure and happy emotions, than as soon as the pleasure and happy emotions go away it's your instinct to walk away or (as you put it) sabotage that relationship so that the other …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/21 11:44 AM
1

I think the idea of TRP is that "nice" behavior repels all women, and that it is in women's nature to not be attracted to being respected. I belief that's a misconception. Having genuine nice behavior towards women (or being a gentleman) is not wrong as long you don't have any type of cover contract. It's the Mr Nice Guy behaviour/persona what women find unattractive (in long term engagements/committments) or set you up as being taken advantage off by people in general (not solely women). Also w…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/21 11:25 AM
4

For me a Blue Pill guy is a person who believes in "The One Soulmate", "The Disney forever after romantic movie script" and/or "Happy wife, happy life" mantra's: who put women on pedestals to be referred no matter their actions, who belief that (positive) masculine qualities are bad by design and to make fun off, who make most of the needs/wants of women above themselves (in a relationship) and who take what women tell what their needs and wants are (from a man in a relationship) at face value a…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/21 07:57 AM
1

The best way to protect and strengthen yourself against emotional pain is not to pretend you can vet out all risks and harm, but actually to take risks and endure them, and inure yourself to the discomfort, becoming stronger in the process. Which in result will give you insight on which values are important for you so that future relationships will be with a long term partner that are compatible with your core and most important values. In other words: vetting and screening. I don't know where I…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/21 06:49 AM
1

For me contact with an ex is perfectly acceptable under these circumstances: - There are kids involved (co-parenting) - The ex is part of her and my social circle (hobbies, friends, etc) - When you are honest about meeting up and being in contact - During any kind of meet-up and/or contact, you both doesn't cross intimicy boundaries expected from an exclusive monogamous relationship (for example: no sexting, no flirting, no sex, no sexy pictures, no communication indicating you're still into him…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/21 08:41 AM
1

Love is not enough in a romantic relationship, it requires mutual attraction, mutual sexual chemistry and/or mutual desire and that results to sex. A romantic relationship without sex means loss of mutual attraction, mutual sexual chemistry and/or mutual desire (which includes kissing, cuddling, flirting, etc) and that kind of a relationship is nothing more than a friendship. Nobody should commit themselves to stay in a relationship where both persons are considered nothing more than roommates.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 04:02 PM
2

While a HVM might get away with it (especially if their partner is unsecure and has boundaries issues), I disagree that DADT is healthy and authentic. In my opinion using DADT is the exact opposite of being a HVM because you're putting on a front (towards your partner/wife/gf/so) since you've not been (overtly) honest about your desires, needs and wants in your relationship (read: still fucking around with other people) especially if you've stated you've committed yourself to an exclusive and mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 03:35 PM
4

Why would you get in a LTR or commit yourself to a marriage if you already know that you will have affairs? Instead of don't ask, don't tell: be a fucking adult and honestly state your needs and wants with your SO before you stick your dick in other women and knock them up by "accident" or before your gf/wife gets "accidentely" knocked up by somebody else...
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 02:26 PM
3

Depends on the values and conditioned relationship boundaries of both and if you've been overtly and honest about it. If you find or have a SO who doesn't have an issue with you spinning plates while in a LTR or marriage (Open Marriage, polyamorous relationship, etc) and you've set this as a condition while you both committed to a relation: I don't see why not. Personally I've seen a number of relationships and/or marriages fail when this topic comes when they've been already been in a LTR and/o…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 01:59 PM
1

Here's where core values and relationship values come in and these should be hashed out overtly before you go for committing to a LTR. However people change, they get older and both their core values and/or relationship values might change and its up to both to overtly communicate their values, needs and wants clearly. And yes, sometimes their values, needs and wants are opposite to each other and this can be considered unreasonable requests. The person who finds them unreasonable should be over…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 01:33 PM
2

All type of relationship with people (personal, at work, friendship, childeren, family, relationship, FWB, etc) has some kind of conditions in place (mostly based upon values and/or boundaries) and if those conditions aren't met they take distance one way or another (discplining by telling children to go to their room, break contact, move to another job, downgrade of friendship, etc, etc). The problem with covert contracts is simply not being honest about your conditions (your needs and wants, y…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 10:51 AM
1

First: you can't control every aspect of your life because there are external factors and/or persons involved and you simply don't control these. You do however have the Fault/Responsibility Falacy which basicaly means that while you might not control others, external factors and/or situations and others might be at fault, you're still solely responsible for your own emotions and/or actions afterwards as well its consequences. So if you make the choice to go celibate; that's your own choice to o…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/21 09:37 AM
1

Respect is based upon a number of personal preferences (read: values) and I don't qualify my respect nor my personal preferences solely to genders. I can have no respect for a person who is demeaning towards myself or my wife. I can have no respect for a person who comes in my home and thinks that my houserules don't apply to him or her. I can have no respect for a person who has no respect for my boundaries. Etc, etc. However, I can't love a woman and be in a relationship without having any res…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/21 01:54 PM
1

I meant external factors as war, genocide, religious persecution, minority suppresion, sexual orientation, freedom of expression, gender suppression, etc, etc. (read: basically goverment sanctioned social policy). You can't compare those topics when it comes to the dynamics of relationships (which are mostly 1 on 1), the behaviour of men and women and/or mutual attraction. External factors is one thing, howver if you keep attracting women with crappy relationship values and/or women who don't re…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/21 01:09 PM
1

That's so much out-of-scope because there so much (external) factors involved not to mention the aspect of group dimension for me to state my personal oppinion about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/21 10:57 AM
3

Depends what kind of break-up and who breaks up. If you're in a divorce (especially if you have kids), you might have other priorities to resolve before dating and committing yourself to a LTR (again). Also the person who breaks-up will mostly be mentally farther along to start dating and willing to commit to a LTR (again) compared to the guy or women who got dumped. For example: With exception of 1 LTR I (I'm a guy btw) was the one breaking up and most of the time it took me a couple of weeks -…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/21 10:52 AM
1

Be reasonable. Unless her or his values, boundaries, needs and wants goes directly against your values and/or boundaries. If you're not willing to do something or can't do something without a condition, be honest about it. Be sincere. I would rephrase this as: Be authentic and honest towards your identity, your values, your boundaries, your needs and your wants. Be mindful of your value to others. See the former and vet/screen to make sure that the other person has the same core values as yours.…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/21 07:29 AM
1

If you're unhappy with the status quo (as defined in your example or other things you're having issues with), it means you don't enforce the right values (using boundaries), have issues with your frame and therefore you're not doing the right vetting/screening. So if you're unhappy with the result of your own relationship history and/or women you attract, the only thing you can do is look at yourself and make the changes there.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/21 07:18 AM
2

They already know men will find them attractive regardless. If a guy - which I am btw - keeps dating a women solely based upon looks or because she has a vagina for the purpose of a serious relationship and you end in a relationship rollercoaster because you encountered crappy behaviour, that's entirely your own fault because you didn't vett/screened her properly. So, am I accurate with my observations or is there something that I’m missing here? Yes you missed something about settling (a big im…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/21 12:17 PM
1

There are quite a bit of dating applications where both men and women have blurred photo's and where the woman and/or man can make it unblurry based upon the number of questions if not manually. The idea is to see if you have a connection on topics/items/interests/values/etc before showing pictures to each other. However, women availability are still imbalanced on these applications (like 35% to 40%) and because of their scarcity they have the same "power" in selection standards compared to othe…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/21 08:03 AM
1

The aspect of branch swinging has nothing to do with a guy simply showing emotional vulnerability, Branch swinging is the result of her not finding her current partner attractive any more (for whatever reason) and /or she found a better replacement. Guys can show true emotional vulnerability (like for example because of loss or death, show and stating desire for his partner, etc) without any issue as long he doesn't dwell on negative emotions for a long time, doesn't have a solution to improve h…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/21 04:03 PM
2

While you have a life with your partner, you should also have a life without your partner and with others because having those social contacts, me-time and being yourself outside of the relationship is extremely important for your own growth as an individual as well as enjoying the interests - that you can't or won't do with your partner - for keeping your own identity. Honestly: It should be mandatory and it's one of the biggest requirement for me in a relationship. If I was in a relationship w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/21 02:19 PM
3

You say that, but I know a couple SAHDs. They actually seem to like their lives, but who knows what happens behind closed doors I know a small number of SAHD's who are content with their role and where their wives/gf respect his role as SAHD. Simply because these guys are still giving priority to themselves (hobby's, own company from home, interests, weekend away with their guy friends, etc), try their best to stay attractive (grooming, working out, clothing, etc) while embracing their manly att…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/21 09:55 AM
3

Guy friends are more pragmatic by looking at both past and the future actions instead of dwelling on emotions and/or feelings in case their guy friend gets dumped.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/21 02:00 PM
1

If your partner is toxic and abusive while you stay with him or her, that means you have unhealthy values and unhealthy boundaries. You can't state "we have mutual values and we respect each others boundaries" while he or she kicks the sh*t out of you on a monthly basis or he or she cheats on you while complaining about his or her behaviour. and staying in a relationship with him or her. The only thing I agree one is that experience might give you a better sense on which values are important for…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/21 01:17 PM
1

It's not because of marital status by default, it's the circumstances; in general single men get paid more compared to single women even if they have the same job, same education, same career, etc. This is mostly because a man will negotiate his salary more often compared to women during his career. However when men get married, they tradditionally have to provide additional financial resources (especially when there's children involved) and as a result they will negotiate for more money or a hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/21 10:37 AM
3

The best way to protect you from a toxic relationship comes down to proper vetting on topics as mutual values, mutual chemistry, mutual relationship goals and most importantly: mutual respect for each other’s boundaries and each other’s ability to take responsibility for them (as in stating them, defending them and/or enforcing them). If you select a LTR partner solely based upon looks and because she has a vagina, you’ll going to have issues down the road. If you’re in a relationship with someb…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/21 08:49 AM
9

The most important reason for me to have a prenup is to make sure there's a Chinese Wall so that past and future financial decisions of me or my wife doesn't have any influence on each others financial resources, that we're both responsible for our own finances and that the (financial) responsibilities towards our family and household are guaranteed by both and that changes in those regards requires both of us to be in agreement (for example, getting a loan on a house requires us both to sign of…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/21 04:08 PM
1

I noticed a lot of men can’t stand to be alone. Not only that but they’re desperate to get married and start a family. They don’t cultivate relationships outside of dating which leads them to be socially inept and needy when they do interact with other people. Most men have no problem being alone, have relationships with other pepole or be socially active without any issues. But most heterosexual men also want to have sex (both in frequency and quality) - which require women - and they don't wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/21 03:47 PM
1

Every person (both men and women) will have to deal with insecurities and fear along their lives. Dealing with it (or not dealing with it) will always have a consequence and consequences can be both negative or positive. It all depends how you deal with it and/or its consequence by taking responsibility for both. If you're dealing with insecurities and/or fear for something and if your action is not taking responsibility for it and/or instead making it (always) the problem of the other person; t…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/21 01:31 PM
1

Sexually abusing women or forcing them to do things (like certain sexual activities) against her will goes against my values, morals, etc and I don't condone this practice from no man. And I also have strict boundaries on cheating. Having said that: unjust damage is up for interpretation as well as what's considered good behaviour and that goes for both men and women. It all depends on your values, morals, culture, boundaries, etc and you enforcing them so that they escalate in behaviour don't t…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/21 10:19 AM
0

Men like stale relationships? I always thought that both sexes would prefer to try keep the fire alive. Well, in my own opinion, I don't see myself standing a boring relationship either; gotta have SOME excitement in your life god damn Men don't like stale relationships, but what I've seen numerous times is that the very attractive guy has settled down and eventually begins morphing towards full beta behaviour which eventually makes his wife/gf lose attraction and desire towards his husband/bf. …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/21 03:23 PM
2

This means, women are destined to lose attraction for their SO over any period of time that lasts more than 2 years. (in my experience. That number may vary depending on individuals. ) Which entirely depends on their SO if they go full beta or if they are also taking responsibility on aspects like their frame and (improving) their attraction while also providing security, stability and committment towards their family.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/21 03:02 PM
1

We're both around 40, both working, married with a teenager in the mix; notice comes by default when you're an adult, have different work schedules and have social obligations with friends and family ;) Her or me going away for a weekend with friends is not something I would count under "If me or my wife's needs/wants/choice has (direct) consequences for the other or the expenses, stability and safety of our household or family; we discuss this and if we both don't agree, it's not going to happe…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/21 03:25 PM
2

Ah yes. Those kind of things is not an issue at all. We're both around 40 in age and we have a shared calendar. As long as she puts it in there, gives notice and there's no important social obligations: she can go do a girl's weekend in Las Vegas including strippers for all I care. For me it's the same: My wife has never stopped me from going from visiting concerts or hanging out with friends as long as I give notice, put it in the calendar and/or as long it doesn't interfere with important soci…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/21 03:01 PM
2

The type of adult woman (or man, but we are really talking about independent women here) who makes and can manage a significant amount of money is also the type of woman who can handle consequences on her own if necessary. She can also discuss things with her spouse as appropriate. No. If it has consequences for the expenses, (financial) stability and security of the relationship (or marriage), household and/or family; it's not a should. He or she must give full disclosure, discuss this and the …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/21 02:09 PM
13

They do enjoy sex. They honestly do, escpecially if you have mutual (sexual) attraction and/or sexual chemistry. Unlike men they also view sexual as transactional. If you're in a(n unwanted) transactional relationship with a woman who only has sex with you only when her superficial standards and/or when her materialistic needs are met; you've selected the wrong woman/partner based upon wrong values. Don't blame women for that: you attract what you are so blame yourself for crappy vetting/screeni…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/21 11:21 AM
5

This is the first issue. You are completely correct here. A woman who is intelligent and good with making/saving her own money wisely is not going to bow down to her man's opinions. This type of woman has opinions based on merit. This type of woman knows that her opinions have practical value. Why pick a man that doesn't listen to her perfectly good reasoning? If you want to be equals in a relationship, the oppinion of both matters and it shouldn't make a difference who works more hours, who has…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/21 09:25 AM
1

Do you think their expectations are reasonable? Do you think they’re a bunch of clowns? When it comes to financially independent: I think it's more than reasonable and for me this is a core value based upon the aspect of taking responsibility for your own (past) actions, choices, problems, etc. This includes the aspect of debts, loans, children from a previous relationship, etc and like hell I'm going to take responsibility for that or that I expect my partner to take care of my past actions as …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/21 08:28 AM
1

I guess I'm lucky with my former gf's and now wife; In the beginning you text more obviously, but I primarily texted my gf's and now wife solely for logistical reasons or the occasional sexting. Of course there are people who need constant attention (not just women, but also guys), so set those boundaries. For example: I just state "I'm busy and we'll talk later" which most people understand with no issue at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 08:47 PM
1

Again, your values and morals are clouding your oppinion on the aspects of sexualisation and it's corrolation of have having sex and under which pretence while being teenagers or adults nor if our sexual education program is unhealthy (especially if you look at the numbers and data). We have the same music as in the US, we have the same multimedia content as in the US, we have legal prostitution, etc, etc. It's not like teenagers here are fucking like rabbits so to speak. When it comes to adults…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 03:43 PM
3

I wasn't saying sex has to be taboo, I was simply saying the way it has been portrayed is completely unhealthy for a developing mind than anything else. I can tell you from personal experience that compared to The Netherlands, the aspect of sex is considered a taboo in (for example) the US. Sexual education should be done, at a healthy age with a healthy outlook and not done in a way which is purely focusing on just the mechanical nature and losing your virginity. Sexual education is not about l…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 03:17 PM
1

From my point of view ignoring yourself (to get laid) is the exact opposite of being red pilled. Being red pilled for me is to embrace your masculinity while improving your attractiveness (both physical as with [masculine] personality traits) as well as self improvement based upon by taking responsibility for yourself, your actions, your problems, your life, your health, your boundaries and your identity. The ability to get laid or to get more sex is a by-product of your road to self improvement…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 03:01 PM
4

Which again is your oppinion based upon your values and morals. For example, there's a huge difference between the "sexualisation" and stigma/taboo on sex in the US and Europe. Hell, there's even a huge difference between Southern Europe, Eastern Europe, Western Europe and the Nordic countries for example (mostly because of religious values). Based upon my values and morals I believe that both women and men should have no constraints when it comes to sex, enjoying sex, talking about sex and expe…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 02:55 PM
1

I agree, the current generation of people in the (ask)TRP reddit have gone way extreme imho. Having said that, the MRP philosophy is more my cup of tea. Of course I don't see it as an IKEA-manual nor do I treat my wife like a sex/household slave or use toxic/abusive behaviour towards her; I use it primarily for improvement of myself, my goals, my values, etc and to improve my attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 10:58 AM
1

Vetting is simply just screening a potential partner (for whatever reason) for red flags on aspects of attraction, chemistry, values and such. While issues from the past - mainly because of mismatch in values or boundary breaking situations - can be troublesome and give drama situations, it's also a mechanism to learn from your mistakes during previous vetting of potential partners and to give you experience on what core values and boundaries are important for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/21 10:08 AM
3

Depends if you marry with a prenup or not. For example: In The Netherlands all marriages since 2018 are with a prenup (Huwelijkse Voorwaarden) by default and many couples here use a registered partnership which basically has the same legal conditions as a marriage with a prenuptial agreement. The reason for me marrying is easier handling of legal implications of pension, financial, tax and inheritence laws as well as the legal responsiblities in case of children, buying a house, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 10:15 PM
2

> When a man cheats on his parter, the woman he cheats with is more to blame than himself. No. You can blame the other person all you want: your significant other acted on it and instead of being responsible and resolve the issues or end the relationship, he or she decided to get in bed with another person. When any person in a relationship or marriage cheats - no matter the reason - that person is solely responsible for his or her cheating (or action) and its consequences.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 10:02 PM
2

Basic human decency doesn't entitle a guy who's been solely nice to a women (by performing a task for her) to have access to her pussy or to be in a relationship with her without him communicating that condition and honestly towards her. If you have attraction for a woman and you use you're niceness to get in her pants or to get in a relationship with her while not telling her about it, you're just as selfish/manipulative/dishonest and let's face it, that's being a hypocrite. Instead of playing …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 03:54 PM
3

When men demand that their wives meet their wants and needs, they get reported to police, divorce raped, and otherwise deprived. You can only demand (or more precise; state your needs and wants in an constructive manner and/or constructive ultimatum) if you've improved yourself (and your SMV) first and accept the consequences no matter the outcome. If you're stupid enough to state your needs and wants while your SMV has barely improved and/or is lower than your wive's or you communicate it in a …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 03:07 PM
2

There's a difference between a truly nice or good guy (read: a person who's actions towards a women or a person are truly unconditional, who's honest about or communicating his needs, wants and motives as well who does express his values, oppinions, boundaries and/or conditions honestly no matter the consequences) vs a Mr. Nice Guy (read: a person who's actions and motives towards women or a person are conditional and not communicated honestly, who's not honest about or communicating his needs, …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 02:47 PM
4

I know a small number of couples who did that. Hell, one of them took his wife back while she was pregnant from the other guy and his condition was: break all contact and make an appointment in the abbortion clinic. For me cheating is a matter of boundaries; if my wife would cheat on me: I would kick her out and divorce her.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 02:25 PM
15

Personally I think that it has got to do with loss of mutal attraction and chemistry first and as a result most men will cheat when their sexual needs aren't met (lust) and most women will cheat when their emotional needs aren't met.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 02:10 PM
3

Men want to get married primarily because she’s a permanent sex partner from whom he can get sex with as little effort as possible (or so he thinks). In both marriage and a LTR: Men want easy access to sex in frequency as well as creating offspring. Most men don’t get anything they want from their marriages. Were that the case: that's not the fault of the institution of marriage/LTR or their wife/gf. You're solely responsible for your own attraction, boundaries, needs and wants as well as your o…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/21 01:56 PM
1

Women do want nice attractive guys, usually with some confidence. Women want a guy who's attractive, confident, assertive, respectful, who can be nice, who can also provide security and stability while also taking responsibility for themselves, their attraction, their boundaries, their values, their emotions, their problems, their actions, etc. Don’t be a jerk, yes attraction matters, and focus on a better self. The issue with "don't be a jerk"-mantra is that when you're focussing to become a be…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/21 02:11 PM
3

To quote Dr. House "Everybody lies" Having said that: honesty towards yourself and being honest about your intentions, your own actions, your own problems, your own (lifestyle) choices, your own communication, your own values, your own boundaries, your needs, your wants, etc and (to own) its consequences; those are the things you can and must take full responsability for. The examples you state are the very opposite of taking responsability nor having healthy boundaries. Woman: Where are all the…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/21 01:05 PM
0

He/She person has a point. Currenty the dowry system is still enforced in a number of countries, marriage arrangements by parents (financial reasons, political reasons, religious reasons, cultural reasons, cast reasons, etc) are still common as well and Western Europe is filled with history about marriage between Royals for political/financial gain till at least WW1; basically marriage was (and still is in a number of countries) a contract between families and should be seen as a business arrang…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/21 01:50 PM
1

Gaining weight using lifting is a good way. It boosts your testostorone, which has shown to improve your sex drive, your mental health as well as improving your muscle and bone mass. Besides the health benefits on both physical and mental level, it makes you look stronger and the side effect is that it can improve your self confidence and quite a number of women will find a muscled/broad/fit body very attractive. My former GF's and my wife just enjoys touching my body and play with certain muscl…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/21 06:56 AM
1

Yes, in my early 20's I was fit and around 75KG at 1.88cm and no issues with dating, etc. In my late 20's I ended up being 115KG (I became lazy, working 60 to 80 hours a week and not taking good care when it came to food). I went from 115KG to 75KG using Ketodiet while going to the gym 3 times a week and running 3 times a week in a period of 12 months. I didn't need any surgery or whatever. After that I enjoyed my single life a lot when it came to dating and getting my sexual needs meet so to sp…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/21 01:29 PM
1

While I can't 100% guarantee that my male friends, family members and/or colleagues have done the things you said, I don't believe that all men are prone to all of the things you described for the women to initiate divorce as the primary reason (at least not in The Netherlands). According to Dutch statistics (source: CBS) most marriages fall apart after 10 to 15 years with a median age of 44 years where the main reasons for divorce are: - Loss of (mutual) attraction / 22% - Loss of (mutual) trus…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/21 06:46 AM
1

Sexless marriage (or a Dead Bedroom) simply translates to loss of attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/21 01:44 PM
9

Based upon RL situations with friends, family and co-workers: most are because of lose of attraction for their guy. Most of these guys were your typical beta-husbands and already complaining about lack of sexual chemistry in both frequency and/or quality for months while eventually getting the "I love you, but I'm not in love with you anymore"-speech or "The fire in our relationship has dwindled, you're not the same guy I fell in love with"-speech.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/21 01:42 PM
1

Everybody has fucking problems, issues and have their rough edges (or blind spots). Knowing them and taking responsibility for them as well as yourself in accordance to your own values, morals and boundaries while accepting the consequences no matter what others think is what makes you an adult. However: What is considered a "good" man or woman is simply based upon the values and morals of an individual which is open to intepretation, oppinions, upbringing, laws, rules, religion, politics, cultu…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/21 11:00 AM
1

There has been a lot recent debate about nice guys vs bad boys and how being ‘nice’ doesn’t get men laid, with many men observing that ‘bad’ guys or assholes are usually more sexually successful then them. The question I have is we really should be focusing the debate in such a binary way, as I don’t think personality traits such as niceness or badness are the only qualities that will predict how sexually successful a man will be. It's not binary, it's an example of opposite traits to show peopl…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/21 09:00 AM
0

Somebody who thinks that has seen to many Disney movies. Look, mainstream media barely talk about attraction or what women want not to mention that everybody can just watch series like Temptation Island, Ex on the Beach, etc, etc or read Cosmo to make up their own minds. Being kind and respectfull are plain qualities of people in general, it has nothing to do with attraction. Attraction and your SMV is based upon your appearance, social status, game and frame to name a few.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/21 01:59 PM
5

First: Just don't belief everything you read on the internet and don't belief everything a woman tells you on what they think is attractive. FFS, being respectfull is basic human decency no matter the kind of relationship and people who aren't respectfull towards you, your morals, your values and/or your boundaries should never be part of your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/21 12:28 PM
7

I am so sick of all those so called bluepilled men continuously telling me that every abusive alcoholic husband is alpha and the posterboy for a strong male (incluence). Jesus wept. Those kind of perons are just a plain A-hole and a bad human being, that has nothing to do being redpilled, alpha, whatsoever.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/21 10:37 AM
2

You’re making the assumption that your SMV - and therefore your attraction - is solely based upon your wealth and/or length, it helps but it’s not. Your SMV and your attraction is based upon your appearance, social status, game and frame to name a few. So perhaps those women left you because your wealth and length had procured you with good appearance/looks and/or social status, but your game and frame was weak compared to the other guys, perhaps you didn’t have good sexual chemistry, perhaps yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/21 08:09 AM
1

Serious LTR of 6 months, GF had to move to Asia for 6 months because of her work (which she chose to do) so my LTR became a LDR. She didn't (want to) get used to her new surroundings, had difficulty with the Asian culture, making friends and thought the best sollution was for her that I should be available 24/7 no matter the time difference of 6 hours and if I was enjoying my social life like while we were in a LTR. I told her: "My world doesn't solely consist of you, don't expect me to wait for…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/21 12:37 PM
3

A simple google query for the term "bad boys attraction women" or "dark triad attractiveness" will give you the links including referalls to their studies. The short version: it's been documented and studied quite a bit as well as the relation of dark-triad traits of men and its attraction towards women especially when it comes to short term mating strategies. One of the conclusions in a study performed in 2013 states on undergrad students: > In conclusion, the results of our study demonstrate t…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/21 03:38 PM
18

I'm Dutch, I've never heard of any study which has proved the corrolation of height with Sexual Education as well as attraction before or after WW2. Instead most studies state that our height increase is part of social economic improvements as well as consumption of more dairy products like milk and cheese.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/21 12:59 PM
1

I'm not going to deny that being broad and having muscles help nor that many women find those features attractive and that guys with those features will have it considerely easier for women to get over her threshold to be initially interested in that guy if he makes contact. Even having those features is not a guarantee: if you do not have game you won't seal the deal and you won't seal the deal while you dress like a hobo, reaking of sweat, your stinking out of your mouth and/or your mouth look…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/21 03:15 PM
1

I can tell you that my wife really doesn't want to hug, kiss let alone have sex with me after I come home sweating from the gym (or run) or smelling of kebab, alcohol and tabacco when I come home after a guys night out. And no, my face and body type hasn't changed at all. Allthough there was that one time where my face was bloody because I slipped with my bike while I had some drinks though...
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/21 02:44 PM
2

The only thing you really need is the ability to look someone in the eyes talk without stumbling over your words and to have your own personality. That's literally having (genuine) game....
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/21 02:33 PM
2

Depends on your definition of looks. If you say "A women only cares for guys who are broad, have muscles and/or have a sixpack and that's enough to get them laid" I'm going to say no, without having game they won't. Some women find guys with beards attractive, some women find only a beginning beard attractive, some women like their guys clean shaven, some women find guys with hair more attractive then being bald, some women find guys in a suit more attractive than a person who dresses casually o…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/21 02:23 PM
1

Do you think it is a myth or is there genuine truth behind it? Can you convince a woman to like you even if they're not really attracted to you physically, just from charm, confidence and good social skills? It's no myth: Game has merit. There's more than enough stories where good looking guys might be attractive physically, but he had (or resorted to) unattractive and/or toxic traits/qualities/tactics where he wasn't able to close the "deal" or lost his gf. For me having game isn't just being p…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/21 12:26 PM
1

Yes. A friend of my wife is really a genuin great guy to be around with (as in fun), but he's also a typical Mr Nice Guy (tm) towards women and/or dating who has said that line in one way or another not to mention to have gone into the friend-zone quite a bit of times. Fun fact in this case is that my wife completely agrees with the "Mr Nice Guy (tm)"-assessment, has told him that (even before I got to know her) and has also asked me if I could nudge him in the right direction of being more asse…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/21 10:46 AM
2

Women love or will be attracted to a man that bring out (strong) emotions, true that. I know certain type of women are indeed attracted to guys with heavy Dark Triad traits and fear is indeed a strong emotion (I've seen it happen IRL), if only a very unhealthy emotion for a guy to bring out in a woman not to mention a powderkeg waiting to happen imho. On that note I've never had to go down the road of using unhealthy emotions to get women's panties wet.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 03:25 PM
6

> Question for men who are attracted to women: would you prefer to be seen as more dominant, aggressive, taller, successful, and stronger, or would you prefer to be seen as more attractive? I would go for the first. Even though the conclusion is quite funny considering that the given traits in your example can be considered attractive physical and personality traits that women want to have in a man to begin with no matter if he's bald or not. Being dominant, agressive and succesfull are RL trait…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 02:09 PM
1

No worries. At least we agree on the concept of STFU :)
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 10:36 AM
3

Yes: dick move or not by somebody else, you're to blame for not having good boundaries and/or using covert contracts. Having good boundaries is all about taking responsibility solely for your own actions and accepting the consequences of your own actions. Period. Using covert contracts is a dick move on your part, because you weren't honest about your intentions and/or conditions. If you stated "I was simp. Now I think it was pathetic, it cost me a lot of money and I learned from it to never do …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 10:29 AM
1

To be honest, I've never experienced an (ex-)gf or my wife weaponize or manipulate an expressed vulnerability with exception during break-ups which I initiated (most of them ended with me hearing them out and stating "No matter what you think the reason is, it doesn't change the outcome.") To be quite frank, when it comes to manipulation in general I've simply stated that "No. I'm not going to manipulated nor change my mind. So leave it be" and STFU. I still have the question: which kind of situ…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 09:51 AM
1

I've calmy expressed the occasional "You can go fuck off. Leave" or "Get the fuck out of my house" towards individuals (while not having any contact with them afterwards) as an escalation but only as a consequence and after they were previously warned this would happen while stating my boundary. When it comes to who's responsible; you can't be held accountable for the actions of others (unless it's your child and he's/she's not an adult yet or a professional reason like being a manager) but you'…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 09:31 AM
1

That women can be more emotional man or express them more freely without negative consequences compared to guys, that's a fact I won't deny. You forgot expressing (genuine) lust, appreciation, affection and desire (also while flirting and gaming). Still, most of these "female-approved" emotions will be a turn-off if you express them in an unhealthy way. It's all about balance: if you do express them in an unhealthy way, even positive emotions can be very unattractive not to mention if you're a w…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/21 08:27 AM
1

I'll stick with red and stay, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 04:07 PM
1

The world isn't a just place. Bad people sometimes succeed and good people sometimes fail. I agree. Live's shit sometimes. However if you do action A and expect result A while you always get B and you're not happy about it, how to get result A is still you're own thing to handle. And to take responsibility in case that happens and how you're going to handle it (and its consequences), that can make a huge difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 04:02 PM
-1

Even though TRP, MRP, PUA, MGTOW, MRM, Incel, etc are part of the manosphere (and not part of the "incel" movement); there's a lot of fundumental differences in approach and/or mentality when it comes to masculinity, dating, women and sex, not to mention friction between these groups and within the same groups considering their offshoots as well. My thoughts are if you want to become a HVM in this current day and age; you need to adapt and own your shit without losing your masculin identity, (co…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 03:56 PM
3

To quote Mark Manson on vulnerability: Vulnerability is consciously choosing to NOT hide your emotions or desires from others. Being vulnerable is not a victim puke, whining, playing the victimcard and blaiming others for your own issues/problems/actions while not taking responsability for them. It's not only unattractive, those are the things that women will "weaponize".
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 12:43 PM
3

The American Way of Life (tm) is not the standard for every person on this planet when it comes to prejudices, judicial system, healthcare and/or education options for people who might be (extremely) unpriviliged; if you want to blaim someone than make politicians and goverment responsible and guess what, you have some power to do that by voting (granted, change will not be instantly and might take years and/or generations). Being attractive mainly consists of two parts: physical traits and pers…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 12:30 PM
-4

For me the incel movement is all about playing a victim by not taking control of the things they can take control of and not taking responsability for their own actions nor accepting the consequences of their own actions. The fact is: while control is an illustion and not everything is your fault; you're still solely responsible for your own attraction (which does include your status, your appereance, your looks, your body language, your masculine qualities, your ability to flirt, etc), your own…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 12:10 PM
1

If it's a guy (guys do whine about shitty dates, lack of sex in their LTR or about their wives/gf) or a woman; I will take time to hear them whining about a situation but in the end I always state: "So what are you going to do about it and/or what can you do to prevent it from happening in the future?", if it's a "I don't know" I sometimes state "If you want honest feedback and/or advice on that subject, let me know".
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 11:16 AM
1

Last time I checked you alone are solely responsible for the people that you want part of your social circle. If you have different values and morals compared to your social circle, you can either state your boundaries in a healthy way and/or find other people who do respect and accept your values, morals and/or boundaries. However if you "retaliate" in a bad way by stating your boundary in an unhealthy and childish manner, you'll experience negative consequences. The only person you can blaim f…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 11:05 AM
1

No. While you can't control external circumstances and/or all situations; you can take control of yourself, your actions, your problems, your needs, your wants, your results, your boundaries, your identity, your values, etc and all of this has consequences. Don't like the results of your own actions (or lack of) and its consequences? It's up to you to take responsability and make the change so that the results (and its consequences) will be in your favour. This goes for both women and men and it…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 10:45 AM
0

He wants women to say "Awww darling, I feel so sorry! I know what makes you feel better, let's go to the bedroom!" Whining simply isn't attractive because a guy goes in a victim-role while stating he doesn't wants to make those changes or take action to get the results he wants and doesn't want to take any responsability.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 10:28 AM
-1

If you tried to do right for years and you don't get the results you want, you did it wrong. So instead of playing the victimcard towards society and/or women, go make changes so that you are happy with yourself and get the results you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 08:59 AM
1

Depends on your location. In The Netherlands prostitution is legal and is regulated, they need to pay taxes, they have full access to healthcare and additional resources where forced prostitution is illegal and enforced rigorously for both the pimp and its customers.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 08:50 AM
1

If only ratings on bio's vs swiping right on bio's and pictures were the same and if only RL personality really matched up with bio's. You can have an awesome bio, but if you don't seem physically attractive for that person he or she will not swipe right.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/21 08:02 AM
2

To your point, sex is certainly a part of our genetics. It's literally the reason we exist. But it's ever present, and it's something we should at least shelter children from. I disagree, it can have disastrous effects if you shelter children at the time when they might become sexual active. In The Netherlands we get an introduction on sexual education around the age of 12, it goes in deeper detail during middleschool and items like consensual agreement, birth control, menstruation cycle, condom…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/20 09:13 AM
1

Assholes get more attention because they're insteresting, they have an identity, good frame and a DNGAF-attitude. They stand out from the rest and especially if they take good care of their physical appereance and have good game they'll attract women because of (sexual) chemistry. All this you can implement as well without resorting to the things you described earlier; just be honest about your identity, your masculine traits/qualities, your values, your boundaries, etc when it comes to your fra…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/20 09:03 AM
2

The only people who state that society is too obsessed with sex are the ones that: don't have a (fullfilling) sex life or hasn't experienced (fullfilling) sex. don't have a liberal/pogressive ideas about the pleasures of (having) sex (read: sex is dirty and not to enjoy so how dare you to get a wet pussy let alone sing about it). have conservative and/or religious values and morals on the perception off (having) sex in general (it's only for creating babies). lack proper sexual education are pru…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 02:47 PM
1

It’s great that certain guys think that birth control shouldn’t be free. They’re more than welcome to think that As a guy I believe that BC should be freely available for women (just like condoms or the choice for a vasectomy should be available for free for men), especially considering that sexual education in a large number of 1st world countries is lacking and to prevent future costs and/or strains on our national economic and/or health budgets because of things like unwanted pregnancies, tee…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 02:28 PM
5

Oh I agree, and notice how nearly every BP on here calls me an asshole for doing just that. Online... where it doesn't even really matter. You're not an asshole, you're simply an adult who knows what he stands for and what he wants. That people don't like it, that's their problem (if you say this, many will follow-up with "you're an asshole" btw) Ok a bit of hyperbole, but having boundaries is not the sort of 'asshole' that gets women aroused. While it is healthy, and something every adult shoul…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 02:24 PM
1

Depends on your morals and values on casual hookups and I was talking about my own personal experience within my social circle; for example a good number of guy friends who were in relationships, a good number of single guy friends/colleagues who dated, some religious family members as well as a number of female acquaintances considered it an asshole move on my part. And to be honest, before my casual hookup experiences (I was only dating seriously or in relationships) I thought it was an asshol…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 01:33 PM
6

To me it's not; I was being honest about my needs by explicity stating "I just want to date to have sex" and it's considered by a large number of people as an asshole move because it's selfish, vulgar, not in line with their values, whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 12:31 PM
6

There is a middle ground: make yourself a priority, don't conditioning any of your actions without telling a person, stop giving up your values, boundaries, needs and wants for somebody else just to make them happy (say "No" more often) and start enforcing your boundaries so that people stop abusing your good nature. You can say "No" if your sister asks you to take care of her kids again because she wants to go shopping with her girlfriends. You can say "No" to your boss when he comes 5 minutes …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 12:01 PM
1

Not mental issues, just different needs. While I was in my 30's I dated mostly women in my age-range while my profile only stated "Not looking for anything serious, just want to have a casual and fun night" and - only if there was mutual sexual chemistry and physical attraction - these ended with having casual sex. Most of these women had (recently) broken up or got divorced after a relationship or marriage of 5 to 10 years, had kids and they weren't looking for a serious relationship at all and…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 11:35 AM
10

You prefer the plain asshole because he's truly honest in his intentions from the beginning where the Nice Guy (tm) has been using a covert contract without being honest about his intentions and used manipulation to get what he wants.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 11:13 AM
1

There's no such thing as a true Nice Guy (tm) who does things out of the goodness of their hart: in fact they're manipulative and dishonest because every action is conditioned (but not known to the other person or persons) because they're afraid to state what they truly need and want and as a result they'll always settle for less and always on the terms of others to make them happy instead of themselves. Why? Most Nice Guy (tm) are afraid of conflict, have covert contracts, don't have or are wil…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/20 10:59 AM
1

While it shouldn't be this way, it comes from the cultural belief that men should be competent enough to be independent and to take care of themselves. Men lose masculinity for showing weakness, unless they have a comeback story which involves beating that weakness. You’re correct to a point. However: Men lose their masculinity and respect from both guys and women if they are constantly dwelling on and/or expressing their emotions in a bad/toxic way no matter if they have a comeback story or not…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/20 12:39 PM
0

Also men talk about women getting more attention then men or women always being the ones to get asked out as if this is a problem women can actually fix or a problem that they are causing When it comes to online dating (sites and apps) the number of women are far less compared to guys (40% women vs 60% guys), so it’s quite logical that women get more messages/likes/swipes compared to men. And because women have less numbers in availability, they’ll have the option to be more critical in their se…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/20 08:50 AM
2

It all depends which aspects of the Red Pilled theory you follow and how you interpertrate that information and put it in practice. Both MRP and TRP is for me a “No More Mr. Nice Guy” on steroids by giving you insight and assistance on the following 2 parts: Awareness about the theory on how female communication and minds work in general so that we guys can understand the dynamics and emotional reasoning from her POV with the purpose for us to translate it to or from our dynamics and/or reasonin…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/20 04:08 PM
2

Everybody lies about their n-count, both men and women. Period. Guys lie about their (succesfull) n-count to get respect from other guys, etc. Women lie about their n-count is because it can have dire consequences on social level (slutshaming by friends, family, co-workers, etc) and/or when she goes for a LTR (not many man will like a woman when she's had a lot of bed partners while enjoying her sexual experimentation phase so to speak).
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/20 08:43 AM
6

I'm sure we've all seen stories on r/relationships where the guy found out something about his gf/wifes past and is having trouble accepting it and everyone in the comments just tells him to fuck off and "get over it". It all depends on the situation at hand. To be frank: both woman and guys lie about their n-count in general or the fact that they enjoyed casual sex, had ONS or a FWB while being young or not in a relationship. In that case yeah: man the fuck up and get over it. However if the gf…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/20 12:33 PM
3

Hypergamy is not a bad thing in general as long as you know it exists so that a guy can act and/or react to it on his own terms. And that last part is something that gives friction with both guys - I’m talking about guys who don’t know it’s there or state it’s fiction - and women. Both don’t like the terms nor do they like it that we know that Hypergamy is practiced.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/20 08:59 AM
1

If you think that your partner has worse values and/or morals compared to yourself and/or your ex-partner(s), why would you commit to an exclusive relationship with that person? If you think that the sex was better with your ex-partner(s) or think that your current partner is less attractive compared to your ex-partner(s), then why would you want to commit yourself to an exclusive relationship with that person? In a LTR I've never really had or wanted to compare my partner(s) with previous partn…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/20 01:04 PM
1

The "Love yourself"-mantra is plain bullshit imho. However the aspect of self respect and what you stand for is not. And as soon as you think you're getting pressured by others to let go of your values and-or boundaries, you choose to do so for reasons like "he's going to leave me if I don't" just says "I'm afraid of conflict" is you giving up your self respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/20 03:38 PM
1

I will not sacrifice my identity, my values and/or boundaries for anthing nor am I willing to compromise on them for nobody and that includes my wife and I expect her to do the same. Luckily for me we are very compatible on our values and we respect our boundaries as well. We have a shared calendar for social obligations (family, birthdays, friends, etc) and if there's nothing scheduled; we're free to do what we want wether it's for me- or us-time. It's called being a fucking adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/20 01:51 PM
4

I had one of those deadbeat dads that decided to walk out of our life completely when I was 2 years old and my mother was pregnant with my sister. The short story: he thought that alcohol was more important than his family, left us with a lot of debt, never took financial responsibility to take care of his kids and wasn’t able to take care of himself as well (he became homeless, never accepted treatment, etc even though in my country there’s a good safety net to a point that being homeless is a …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/20 02:14 PM
1

I think you mistake the aspects of TRP that promote casual hookups and to have multiple plates compared to dating with LTR or a GF as the endgame (which is not advised). From my personal experience - as a guy - when it comes to developing romantic feelings (which I would rephrase to wanting me to emotionally commit to the idea of an exclusive relationship with the intention that we both become mutual exclusive on all aspects of intimacy) for somebody comes down not only on having mutual desire, …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/20 01:53 PM
1

No, I don't have anybody that I consider a true female friend; the only exception are female partners from my friends and female friends from my wife with who I meet up regularly as a couple. I do have a number of female acquaintances because they are part of my social circle (hobbies, work and such), but I always follow the strict guideline: Don't shit where you eat. Still, I had a small number of female friends in my lifetime. But I never had romantic feelings for them, I completely lost touch…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/20 08:49 AM
1

A guy struggling with dating is not about him not being a catch is mainly him not being lucky. No, it's not being unlucky, it's not having game and not being attractive as a man (not just looks, but also masculin qualities) while being needy for the validation of women and others. What gives you the abundance is that you don't care what other people - especially women - think of you. You have your values, your boundaries, your needs, your identity and you stick to them and enforce them no matter…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/20 11:02 AM
2

Everybody has problems, makes wrong decisions and has (character) flaws. Never should these problems, decisions and/or flaws become a consequence for others to handle, to fix or be used as excuses for wrong/toxic/immoral behaviour from yourself. It’s not that women won’t accept faults or flaws; it’s that they won’t accept that you don’t own up for them and/or take responsibility for them. For me the core of TRP/MRP is that to become HV isn’t materialistic based (read: shitload of money) nor does…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/20 10:10 AM
2

​ Don't move in with your boyfriend? Good advice. Unless you are engaged, that is a stupid thing to do. Depends on your values on marriage as well as the standards of the country you live in. In my country (The Netherlands) marriage or being engaged is not considered a standard or endgame for couples at all. In fact most (young) couples live together for years and they mostly have a contract in place that states standard fiscal standards including rights and obligations for both in the form of a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/20 03:14 PM
1

For a guy it all comes down to expressing emotions the right way, to not dwell in those emotions for a long time as well as making sure that you can handle it yourself, don’t forego your responsibilities nor that you express them in such a way you let go of your values or yourself. For me the golden rule is that unless it’s a personal tragedy or a personal boundary issue: don’t express every emotion and don’t constantly validate your own insecurities towards your partner or others. And if you do…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/20 01:51 PM
3

If she happens to be arrogant and selfish and brings this along in the relationship (a lot); she simply doesn’t respect you because you’re considered a LV guy in her eyes. Perhaps your vetting skills sucked in the first place (can happen, we've all been there). Stil in the end it’s your responsibility to state your boundary, defend it accordingly and if she keeps it up, consequences should come in play and you’re free to walk away from the relationship; plain and simple. It’s all about vetting h…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/20 03:28 PM
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