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njakubow Archive

View 0 posts and 22 comments by njakubow on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

My anniversary was Sat and court is Thurs. I went for a 30 mile bike ride with some friends. Stay busy, stay active.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/26 09:27 PM
6

My ex's first offer was 0.4% we have court in four weeks, and she's starting to come around to 50/50. We'll see what she says in the next few weeks.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/26 07:50 PM
8

Chief Technology Officer. Just found out she got a hefty raise 10 days before asking for a divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/26 05:18 PM
2

At first I had a realtor run a CMA. She didn't like the number, her realtor ran a comp on a home that was half the size, no finished basement, no garage, etc. So our numbers came out different. Ended up getting a licensed appraisal, which verified the number my realtor came up with. Appraisal was $500.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/26 11:26 PM
2

Set small, achievable goals. Planning big projects can feel overwhelming and tough to start. Setting small goals to get those projects started or planned can feel like wins.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 02:25 PM
3

It wasn't the root problem, but it probably didn't help.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/26 01:23 AM
1

The mediator told me you can refuse to pay for some items when dividing it up. My wife booked $5k in hotels and flights, I said I wasn't paying and the mediator said I wouldn't have to.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/26 08:54 PM
3

The day my ex said she wanted a divorce she said she hoped we could be friends. I said I wasn't ready for that, maybe in the future. Now 3 months into the divorce process and she won't communicate with me. Went to the house to pick up mail, I said hi and thanks, she didn't even say a word. Once I stood up for myself, assets started getting divided, her sentiment changed. I don't see a friendship in the future.
/r/Divorce_Men11/04/26 08:45 PM
2

I'm 3 months into a very similar experience. She asked for a divorce, told me she felt alone in the relationship, I tried to change, but it was too little too late. We sat down and told each other we love one another and even knowing how it all ended, would do it again. For the first three days I didn't sleep or eat. Having support to lean on is incredibly helpful, even if that support is thousands of miles away. You may even be able to find local groups for extra support. You can't dwell on the…
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 11:49 PM
8

Had a second mediation call just a few hours ago. The mediator said multiple times to her, "he has a valid concern there", "it doesn't work that way", and "that's information you need to provide". Pretty good feeling knowing you're not being outlandish or unreasonable, and there's someone to back you up.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 09:37 PM
2

Get balances and statements from the day (or monthly statement) before you were legally married. Anything invested or earned from day of marriage to today would be marital. If you're earning 3x her you'll probably be paying some alimony, at least it won't be for a long period od time.
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/26 03:18 PM
1

I considered it, but a friend mentioned it's important to be close to your support system.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/26 07:30 PM
2

I've had the opposite experience. Dreams have given me some closure. I have been stressing over the idea of her moving on and dating again. The other day I had a dream where she's telling me about her new boyfriend, I didn't get angry or spiteful just accepted it. I woke up and had the clarity that it was fine and she'll move on.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/26 07:21 PM
2

Ego is the Enemy
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/26 02:27 PM
1

How easy is it to assume a mortgage? I've heard typically doesn't happen with conventional loans. I'm hoping my ex can assume the mortgage for a home and pay me out the equity, I would like to avoid selling it.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/26 01:58 PM
2

I've noticed who or what I'm doing matters. If I'm climbing or hiking with one or two friends, everything is good. But the other day I went to a friend's house for the SB and it was difficult seeing everyone there with their spouse and kids.
/r/Divorce_Men11/02/26 04:32 PM
7

I went through something similar. Christmas was happy and joyful, New Years we're getting a divorce. Said she had been unhappy in the relationship for a while. When I started telling people everyone was shocked, never say it coming, didn't know we had troubles, etc. Reachout to close friends and family and talk about it. Anyone willing to listen, talk to them about it. Everyone has different perspectives and input. There's a flood of emotions, humiliation, self doubt, anger, and vindictiveness. …
/r/Divorce_Men07/02/26 12:05 AM
9

I'm only 4 weeks into the divorce process and am moving out in 2 weeks. The quiet, lonely home scares me. No dogs, no person to come home to, just by yourself. The last 8 years have been the happiest of my life, and each year was only getting better (in my eyes). Now it feels like I'm starting all over, with nothing. My situation is a bit similar, kind of came out of nowhere, although the signs were there. I thought we could make it work and figure it out. One of the hardest things was how we bo…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/26 08:38 PM
1

Still going through the process so nothing's been finalized. I didn't ask for anything additional when I gave up the dogs, but maybe it will help my case.
/r/Divorce_Men24/01/26 09:18 PM
3

I decided to give her the dogs. She offered to trade off every 2 weeks, but a friend tried that and it ended poorly. You end up relying on each other, plus seeing each other every two weeks. It's hard to give them up, but I know it had to be done.
/r/Divorce_Men23/01/26 07:37 PM
2

I filed yesterday and we've been talking about how to split assets. She's being very difficult and in her eyes she contributed more so gets more. I've tried explaining to her the laws laid out by our state. Trying to get what I believe is fair and protect myself for the future. She's already moved money from shared to personal accounts and canceled CC I was using. How do you communicate with someone who is being very stubborn?
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 05:21 PM
2

I'm only a week into finding out she wants a divorce and this is incredibly relatable. The amount of highs and lows is exhausting, it's a constant battle not to let the depression take over. Seek support, stay busy, and stay positive.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/26 04:05 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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